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Speaker 1: Aro dot net. It's more than just a podcast. It's

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twenty different podcasts. It is a network. It is a choice.

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It's an opportunity for you to hang out without going,

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oh my god, the same old news stories over and

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over again. How many times can I hear that play?

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By playing college basketball? I get it, man, I get it.

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Aro dot net A r r oe dot net. You

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can get your sports all level of sports, from gaming

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to professional wrestling, college. We're talking to the biggest names.

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In fact, I haven't spent some time with Kareem abdul Jabbar.

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Say what Aro dot net A r r oe dot net.

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Enjoy your exploration.

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Speaker 2: Hey Sarah, Hey, this is vocal dfragging. Vocal dfragging is

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taking the time to ask yourself the questions and then

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question the answers. I get the opportunity to do this

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while taking a transition walk. That's what I call it,

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a transition walk through this beautiful forest in South Charlotte,

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North Carolina. So it's asking those questions of yourself because

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you know, we tend to run to other people say

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what would you do? What would you say? How can

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I do this? How can I do that? And you're

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asking people that don't live in your shoes for direction,

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and it's like, okay, if you were to take your

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shoes off and put it on their feet, Is this

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a Cinderella moment? Hell no, it's not. That Night in

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Shining Armor didn't get his princess because your shoes don't

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fit on somebody else. So ask yourself the questions, question

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the answers. This is vocal d Frek. I thought came

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to me the very moment I stepped inside this forest today,

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and it was don't judge they don't judge they because

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how many steps away are you from? They identify you're

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they because we're all judgers. In the nineteen eighties, we

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called them people who heather, people that stand on the sidelines,

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and we offer opinion. We go, oh, I would not

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have worn that. Where did they get that? I mean,

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look at the song Baby God back? Oh would you

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look at that? But you've been there? Who are they

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in your life? Because we are judging they When you

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identify your they then ask this very important question, how

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many steps away are you from they? Do you know

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what I mean? Maybe not? Let me put it this way.

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In Ukraine, in Gaza, it didn't matter if you were rich, poor, sick,

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in the best health that you've ever been in your life.

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They were the innocent people that had to take the

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impact of those bombs bursting. They and what do people do?

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They judge? They? They judge people inside businesses Here in

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America or around the country. We're constantly and endlessly just

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judging people. And so I just want to turn it

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down a little bit and ask you what would happen

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if you were they? And how many steps away are

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you from they? Break it down. You know, you can

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take a look at your bank account all you want,

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but in the blink of an eye, things can change

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so swiftly, putting a current inside your heart that all

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of a sudden you're finding yourself looking at a they

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in the bathroom mirror, And I have to ask one

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more time, how many steps away are you from they?

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If we are stuck on judging people because it just

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seems like the thing to do to keep up with

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the jones, or just to start a conversation, Oh my god,

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would you ever be caught ordering that at a restaurant? Well,

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you just looked at a they and you just said, ah,

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I'm not that they. I'm not going to do that,

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But I do ask how many steps away are you

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from they? And how do you deal with situations like

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that where your judgment of others begins to seep into

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your own heart? Because if you're been there, been in

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a situation where you say something and then about three

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steps later, you go, crap, that was a little harsh.

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I gotta go back and apologize. And even though you

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do apologize to that day, what happens is is that

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your mind is going they don't believe me. Oh God,

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I just destroyed our trust, the one thing that we

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had in common, a little bit of trust. It's kind

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of bit the big one right now. So I'm gonna

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ask you again how many steps away are you from they?

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When it comes to homelessness, do you really think you're

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a long ways away from homelessness? What is homelessness in

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this age that we presently live in. I know a

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lot of people that went out and bought RVs, and

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they live in their RVs over and over again, and

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they have to move from these different campsites because you

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can only be in there for fourteen days. But a

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lot of people call them homeless. They don't have a

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real home, They are mobile they're in campgrounds endlessly. How

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many steps away from they are you? And then you

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build that bridge and you start thinking, who else am

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I judging? Like this guy that's in this forest right

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now with its leaf flower? How many steps am I from?

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They in the way of saying, why don't you go

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blow your own forest, dude, instead of walking through it? Well,

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the reason why being on this side of the day meter,

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I kind of like the sound of leaves crunching below

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my feet. I don't want a bare force when I

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step out here. But that's the beauty of being a

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part of this community inside this forest. We all have

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different ways and textures of maintaining the forest floor and

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how it's going to grow. Some people have beautiful, beautiful,

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beautiful settings that they purchase from lows and home depot,

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or you can have what I have, which are wild roses,

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wild grapes, and a bunch of other things that I

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don't know what it is, but it's there and it

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grows and it's beautiful and the migrating birds come in.

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But how many steps away are you from they? Now,

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let's twist it. Do you think they're sitting back saying

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how many steps away am I from they and you

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are they? You are the one that they're judging. How

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does it make you feel you're on that side of

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it now? We all like to sit there and make

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little comments about people, But when it's turned on us,

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how do you receive it? You're just as much a

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they as they are? And you deal with it how?

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And you grow with it? How? And what else is

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going on in your life to where them you being

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a they just like they? How does that change the

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playing field? How about being more compassionate and grateful of others,

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being happy that you may live in a nation that's

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not seeing bombs bursting in the middle of the night.

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You know, because at the drop of a hat, you

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do not know what these other names are going to do,

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what kind of steps they're going to take. There is

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so much clickbait on social media. There's so much going

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on on Instagram, TikTok and as old as Facebook, And

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what are we doing on so much of that? We

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are judging they? How many steps away from they are you?

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And how can you calm that monster down by being

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honest with yourself? Write a journal, put in there this

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is who I was talking about today? Why was I

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talking about him? What could I have done to have

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of it? What could I have done to have a

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better conversation? How about a relationship? How about a community

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driven talk about nothing, just about the cooler weather, the wind,

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the storm at five o'clock this morning. Building a community

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requires one thing, less judgment, more activation. How many steps

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away from they are you ask the questions, question the answers.

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I call it vocal, defragged. Do it in a journal

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or do it on a digital device. I'm Meryl