Speaker 1: Aro dot net. It's more than just a podcast. It's
twenty different podcasts. It is a network. It is a choice.
It's an opportunity for you to hang out without going,
oh my god, the same old news stories over and
over again. How many times can I hear that play?
By playing college basketball? I get it, man, I get it.
Aro dot net A r r oe dot net. You
can get your sports all level of sports, from gaming
to professional wrestling, college. We're talking to the biggest names.
In fact, I haven't spent some time with Kareem abdul Jabbar.
Say what Aro dot net A r r oe dot net.
Enjoy your exploration.
Speaker 2: Hey Sarah, Hey, this is vocal dfragging. Vocal dfragging is
taking the time to ask yourself the questions and then
question the answers. I get the opportunity to do this
while taking a transition walk. That's what I call it,
a transition walk through this beautiful forest in South Charlotte,
North Carolina. So it's asking those questions of yourself because
you know, we tend to run to other people say
what would you do? What would you say? How can
I do this? How can I do that? And you're
asking people that don't live in your shoes for direction,
and it's like, okay, if you were to take your
shoes off and put it on their feet, Is this
a Cinderella moment? Hell no, it's not. That Night in
Shining Armor didn't get his princess because your shoes don't
fit on somebody else. So ask yourself the questions, question
the answers. This is vocal d Frek. I thought came
to me the very moment I stepped inside this forest today,
and it was don't judge they don't judge they because
how many steps away are you from? They identify you're
they because we're all judgers. In the nineteen eighties, we
called them people who heather, people that stand on the sidelines,
and we offer opinion. We go, oh, I would not
have worn that. Where did they get that? I mean,
look at the song Baby God back? Oh would you
look at that? But you've been there? Who are they
in your life? Because we are judging they When you
identify your they then ask this very important question, how
many steps away are you from they? Do you know
what I mean? Maybe not? Let me put it this way.
In Ukraine, in Gaza, it didn't matter if you were rich, poor, sick,
in the best health that you've ever been in your life.
They were the innocent people that had to take the
impact of those bombs bursting. They and what do people do?
They judge? They? They judge people inside businesses Here in
America or around the country. We're constantly and endlessly just
judging people. And so I just want to turn it
down a little bit and ask you what would happen
if you were they? And how many steps away are
you from they? Break it down. You know, you can
take a look at your bank account all you want,
but in the blink of an eye, things can change
so swiftly, putting a current inside your heart that all
of a sudden you're finding yourself looking at a they
in the bathroom mirror, And I have to ask one
more time, how many steps away are you from they?
If we are stuck on judging people because it just
seems like the thing to do to keep up with
the jones, or just to start a conversation, Oh my god,
would you ever be caught ordering that at a restaurant? Well,
you just looked at a they and you just said, ah,
I'm not that they. I'm not going to do that,
But I do ask how many steps away are you
from they? And how do you deal with situations like
that where your judgment of others begins to seep into
your own heart? Because if you're been there, been in
a situation where you say something and then about three
steps later, you go, crap, that was a little harsh.
I gotta go back and apologize. And even though you
do apologize to that day, what happens is is that
your mind is going they don't believe me. Oh God,
I just destroyed our trust, the one thing that we
had in common, a little bit of trust. It's kind
of bit the big one right now. So I'm gonna
ask you again how many steps away are you from they?
When it comes to homelessness, do you really think you're
a long ways away from homelessness? What is homelessness in
this age that we presently live in. I know a
lot of people that went out and bought RVs, and
they live in their RVs over and over again, and
they have to move from these different campsites because you
can only be in there for fourteen days. But a
lot of people call them homeless. They don't have a
real home, They are mobile they're in campgrounds endlessly. How
many steps away from they are you? And then you
build that bridge and you start thinking, who else am
I judging? Like this guy that's in this forest right
now with its leaf flower? How many steps am I from?
They in the way of saying, why don't you go
blow your own forest, dude, instead of walking through it? Well,
the reason why being on this side of the day meter,
I kind of like the sound of leaves crunching below
my feet. I don't want a bare force when I
step out here. But that's the beauty of being a
part of this community inside this forest. We all have
different ways and textures of maintaining the forest floor and
how it's going to grow. Some people have beautiful, beautiful,
beautiful settings that they purchase from lows and home depot,
or you can have what I have, which are wild roses,
wild grapes, and a bunch of other things that I
don't know what it is, but it's there and it
grows and it's beautiful and the migrating birds come in.
But how many steps away are you from they? Now,
let's twist it. Do you think they're sitting back saying
how many steps away am I from they and you
are they? You are the one that they're judging. How
does it make you feel you're on that side of
it now? We all like to sit there and make
little comments about people, But when it's turned on us,
how do you receive it? You're just as much a
they as they are? And you deal with it how?
And you grow with it? How? And what else is
going on in your life to where them you being
a they just like they? How does that change the
playing field? How about being more compassionate and grateful of others,
being happy that you may live in a nation that's
not seeing bombs bursting in the middle of the night.
You know, because at the drop of a hat, you
do not know what these other names are going to do,
what kind of steps they're going to take. There is
so much clickbait on social media. There's so much going
on on Instagram, TikTok and as old as Facebook, And
what are we doing on so much of that? We
are judging they? How many steps away from they are you?
And how can you calm that monster down by being
honest with yourself? Write a journal, put in there this
is who I was talking about today? Why was I
talking about him? What could I have done to have
of it? What could I have done to have a
better conversation? How about a relationship? How about a community
driven talk about nothing, just about the cooler weather, the wind,
the storm at five o'clock this morning. Building a community
requires one thing, less judgment, more activation. How many steps
away from they are you ask the questions, question the answers.
I call it vocal, defragged. Do it in a journal
or do it on a digital device. I'm Meryl