Speaker 1: Welcome, welcome, Can you hear me?
Speaker 2: Five four.
Speaker 1: Three two one zero dire wave.
Speaker 3: Us something.
Speaker 1: Dire wave. The scientific method cannot justify the scientific method.
Therefore itself is a dogmatical physper.
Speaker 2: Submissions stop stop stop.
Speaker 4: Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop stop stops stop stop stop
stop stop stand ins.
Speaker 5: In the sticks and stop stop stop s s.
Speaker 6: S s s.
Speaker 7: Stop stop stop stops stop, stop stops stop stop stops,
snow stops shot.
Speaker 3: Start shop stop s chang.
Speaker 1: The Brazienski model, the take the craft model, is much
more interested in the incremental, slow, killed Fabian approach to
bringing the technocracy into being. So they're not going to
send the Homeland security troops to round you up and
put you in a FEMA camp. They'd much rather promote
everybody being in national video games, the Disney ulog, the
virtual reality and all this kind of stuff is in
much better FEMA camp in your home. They don't need
the FEMA camp. It's it's too messy, it's a big ordeal.
Uh and it's all the nonsense of all the patriot
crap on the radio.
Speaker 3: That's not gonna happen.
Speaker 1: They don't need to the The shadow of the global
government is already here. And as we said that, it's
in the latter stages of the mopping up process to
move it into the next phase and ig between two
ages of the next age.
Speaker 6: And you hear from me all.
Speaker 8: You can bear the now listening to the diary wave,
you can hear me now wench made Joe Oblivian.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there we go. Yeah. See you have to switch
between all these different audio things blah blah blah blah blah.
Speaker 9: So I don't want you to hear beautiful things that
I hear right and dire way, that's whe die way.
Speaker 3: You don't hear that.
Speaker 6: We're gonna stay.
Speaker 1: Welcome, welcome, which made j of O blievey boy, we're
daring of y'all.
Speaker 6: Get to.
Speaker 1: Bye great ze.
Speaker 9: All that word salad is just part of my wizardry.
Speaker 10: Yeah, what's up? Oh, I'm just on the phone. I'm
talking to the wizards talk yeah about to.
Speaker 6: Kick and come a stall here, say called Tario, come
to me, my son jump up that yeah, really.
Speaker 1: Problem crime, Why that's right, don't tire way, we're not kicking.
I got to hear the.
Speaker 5: Song.
Speaker 6: Here we go.
Speaker 1: Anyway, Soldiers of oblivion.
Speaker 6: I'm trying to die away down.
Speaker 1: I had a good song I was going to sing.
It was great during the first few minutes, and then
the microphone. What doesn't you have to switch it over
in the mixer. Blah blah blah blah blah. The riddle
of live streaming. You know, it's different when you have
people on. You have to switch everything over when it's
just me, So it's different. All right, Welcome to the
Conan Show. Damn it. I had the best Pagan Conan
song and it worked so good with the doarwave. I'll
just have to sing over the doorwave and upload that
separate or upload that. As the intro to Conan Kanan Conan,
somebody said, are you doing an episode on Conan O'Brien
and I said, no, Conan, the old barbarian, that's what
you mean. Yes, So we're gonna start with the stinkball
Red Sanja Read Sanja was a terrible movie. It ended
people's careers. It was a bunch of dirt, a bunch
of nonsense. And we're gonna start with some of the
cool movie facts about Red Sanja. It was a giant disappointment.
Cost eighteen million dollars and it made seven million, and
it was released on the same day as Back to
the Future. Bad idea, right. It killed the careers of
the two screenplay writers, George Fraser and Clive Exton. You're out,
You're done. You have a twenty million dollar bomb that
makes seven. You're out now.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 1: This was supposed to be the third in the Conan series,
but it was so difficult to get this made that
it just ended up being a big disaster. U there
was a steamy affair between Arnold and Bougitte Nielsen. Arnold
then dumped her when they got back from filming. I
think this was filmed in Mexico. Yeah, no, no, I'm sorry,
this wasn't filmed in Mexico. I don't know where this
one was filmed, but it's Conan the Destroyer that was
filmed in Mexico, which was being filmed at the same
time as Doune, hence the day Lorentis Film Company connection.
You see. But Arnie dumped Brigitte after their steamy affairs,
and then Brigette came back and married Stallone. This is
accredited nineteen eighty five with killing the Sword and Sandel
genre for many, many, many years. I don't know what
the next Sword and Sandal hit would be Lord of
the Rings. I don't know. Not much in the nineties
Sword and Sandal that I can think of that was successful.
Remember First Night I was a bunch of junk. Remember that?
Remember that Dragon movie with Sean Connery that was awful. Anyway,
Arnold is on record supposedly, now this is just from
movie facts. I don't know if this is true, but
it's funny, right, it makes for a good a good story.
Arnold is on record saying that he has no pride
in this film, and he claims that when he was
disciplining his children, he would actually punish them for their
misbehavement by making them watch Red Sonja. That's pretty good.
That was one of That's one of Arnold's best jokes.
I'll have to give him credit for that. Let's see, Yeah,
we did that. So when he started dating Maria Shriver,
she married Slash Stallone and that didn't last very long.
And then the villain sandal Bergmann, who is a wine grandma.
Now it was the hero. She was the blonde lover
to Arnold in the first one. So that's some neat
movie facts. We're gonna be including the neat movie movie
facts section, just to spice it up a little bit
so that we're so that we're not typecast. I can't
be typecast. That's the guy who does esoteric movie reviews.
Speaker 6: Uh.
Speaker 1: She has savage red hair. According to the movie of
description savage. She grows up in a savage land. She
is a pagan shield maiden of Alcyrie. Where is Vargue?
Is this does varga fan or is this Hollywood destroying
the legitimate honor and history of the Aryan shield maidens
clam It takes place during the Highborian Age, which is
a fictional creation of the comic book from which it arises,
which comes from the Hyperborean mythical ancient Greek lands, the
lands of the North where the giants come from, right
where gigantic r Martin's come from the Land of the North.
Vengeance shall be yours, right, This is what they tell
the spirits of the Valkyrie's I guess bridget Sonja when
she's raped and pillaged by the forces of the evil Queen. Now,
this is such a cookie cutter plot that it's quite
literally the same plot as Conan, But they just stuck
in the red headed chick right, and of course it's
very subtle. But did you notice that the queen, the
evil witch Queen, is a lesbian. She's an evil witch
lesbian queen. I never caught that until this last viewing.
And Sonya has a mullet. This is kind of a mullet,
I guess, but both Sonja and Conan have the same
do red mullet. We see a weird cult just like
in Conan rehash that right, and it's they're concerned with
the destruction of the talisman. The talisman is a glowing
green volleyball that is able to create worlds. This is
the white bitch Starbucks cult, the white bitch wine Mom
Starbucks cult. I don't know why. They're all white bitches.
And they have the Talisman of the Highest Gods, the
God of the Gods, the Creator's talisman. But the talisman
has become too powerful and so the priestesses decide to
destroy it. Now, this is interesting because this is an
obvious gnostic theme, right that the ability to create worlds
is merely just some advanced technology, and that will eventually
have this advanced technology. But here it's a bunch of
white bitches that got the control of it. Right now,
if they have the ability to create worlds, why don't
they just create a world where there's no lesbian witch queens.
That's my first logic question for the logic of Red
Sun Job, because we then see, in the midst of
this ritual of the destruction of the Talisman of creation,
the witch Queen, the lesbian witch queen, shows up and
she's ready to steal the talisman for its power. But
why didn't she just steal the talisman the day before
the destruction ritual? I mean, if you knew that there
was the talisman of power to create worlds, why wait
until the day that it's going to be tossed into
the abyss to hijacket. Anyway, So the eighties, by the way,
they really enjoyed glowing green things and glowing blue things.
Eighties blue lightning and glowing green orbs and talismans and goo.
If you remember John Carpenter's Prince of Darkness, the substance
of evil, the substance of evil itself is glowing green goo.
Slimmer is glowing green goo. No one can touch it,
touch it, touch it except the women and particularly the
virgins and whatnot. Right, Well, I'm not sure what this
means there's obviously a sexual undercurrent to all of the
conin series. I don't know why. No one can touch it,
but that's what the mythology of this world is. No
one can touch it. Now again, I don't see why.
If you can create worlds, you don't just create a
new world without the lesbian witch queen. By the way,
not PC. This is not PC. Evil lesbian witch queens
should have every right to steal winch maidens if they
so desire. So this is BC. That's not PC. However,
as we'll see in a moment, Red Sanja will actually
be quite PC, so there will actually be some BCPC
and some BC opp in the midst of the BC
n PC. Anyway, I don't know what it means. Somebody
was asking me what is the symbolism in this film,
and I said, I don't know. Hi, Borea, Uh, we
learned what you see. Let me skip the Hyboria note.
So we learned that she hates men, right, she's been
raped and mistreated, maltreatment, and so she is a social
justice warder. She's read Sonya Justice Warrior. She's a Sonya
Justice Warrior. And even her pie May looking handler tells her.
You can't hate all men, dude, Sonja, that's just not
gonna make you happy. I'm gonna pull him up for
you here. Uh is this guy an inspiration for pie May?
He sure looks like it. Let's see. Oh man, I
hate it when the JPEGs won't work in the damn
Now I'm gonna do this blah blah blah blah, climb
kill some time with a good I put my sword
in my mouth, locker down, barbarian. I picked my teeth
with a sword.
Speaker 6: Dog.
Speaker 1: So her handler, just like Arnold, has an Asian Eastern handler. Racious.
That's racious, Okay? Is that time? It looks like.
Speaker 6: And then.
Speaker 11: Yeah, oh come on, this is so stupid. Where's our gap?
Where are gap?
Speaker 6: All right?
Speaker 1: Yeah? I know here? We got pay may? Yeah she.
If you're gonna learn the ways of the Far East,
be sure it's under the tutelage of a guy that
looks like that, because if you look like that, you
know your ship. Dude. Don't you think I do? Now?
So he counsels Sanjaw, not the hate man. And really
she's just waiting to be conquered by a stronger man
because when she meets Arnold after she finds her lovely
Asian sidekick. Lovely Asian size sidekicks were very token in
the eighties. Short round right goonies shot around John Right.
There's a cute little Asian sidekick in this one, kicking butt.
Speaker 6: Uh.
Speaker 1: He's called Prince sounds like Prince Tart. I'm not sure
what his name. Prince Tarn I think is the name,
but it sounds like he says Prince Tart. Then concern
h Conan. What's interesting is Conan's concerned with consent. That's
what I found most fascinating about this is that Conan
doesn't just have his ways with this winch Mage. He
asked for consent, and that's respectable that Conan would have
some bc PC and he respects Sonya Justice Warrior. And
then I thought the movie is driven by the mcguffin, right,
the talisman. And then I thought, if talisman's are mcguffins,
does life have a mcguffin. That's something I want you
to ponder. That's the only takeaway from red Sonjohn A
stink bomb. That's it. That's all we have from red Sonja.
It's only entertaining if you're in the mood for a
bad movie. Next we move to Conan led Destroyer, Conan
excuse me, yes, Conan of the Destroyed, another stink bomb.
The only good film in these is Conan the Barbarian,
which is pretty good for what it is, right, I
mean's goofy, but it's good, and it has the most
esoteric stuff, the most interesting stuff, and we can thank
the great Oliver Stone for that. Although there's some interesting
facts about Oliver Stone's Conan that I will relate to
you in a moment that I didn't know. Fifteen things
you probably didn't know about Conan the Destroyer. It's based
on the nineteen fifty eight film of The Vikings, and
so for this part too. In the Loose Trilogy, director
John Millius went and hired Richard Fleischer, who directed The Vikings.
The original script had numerous changes. It wasn't the movie
that everybody thought it was going to be. It kept changing,
and it was filmed in Mexico to cut down on costs.
At the same time, out of the day lo Renis
Production company as David Lynch's nineteen eighty four Dune. I
thought that was really neat. There are some similar characters
in different roles between this trilogy and Dune Allivia to Albo.
The Princess was thirty team when the film began. Wilch
Chamberlain is in this. If you don't recall Wilt Chamberlain,
who of sleeping with twenty thousand women fame supposedly. No,
that's sure. I believe that. But that's that's the That
would be like three hose a day for twenty years. Yeah,
I'm not sure I believe that anyway, if you want to.
By the way, if you're enjoying this show, be sure
and follow me. I need followers, right, be sure and
follow me on my my Insta. There's my insta for
you nerds out there. If you haven't followed my insta.
Speaker 11: Follow it.
Speaker 1: Yes, there's boiler room tonight. If you're not Wench Maidens,
Wench Nerds, there will be a boiler room tonight. This
also has Grace Jones, by the way, from View to
a Kill Fame, as we discussed in View would Kill.
So there's our lovely couple there. This was at the
same time that Arnold got his dual Austrian US citizenship
the day that filming began, and this actually during the filming,
and this actually helped destroy there being any Conan three
because Arnold was too busy moving into politics by the
time there was going to be in the late nineties
and early two thousands Conan three. And lastly, here the
Raiders of the Lost Arc Nazi who gets knocked into
the propeller if you remember that scene, is the same
guy who plays I'm on Toss the Magician, who looks
like Alan Moore by the way, a bald Alan Moore.
He has the same little magician's clause that Alan Moore has.
Let's see. So moving on here, Andre the Giant plays
the Daygoth creature, which is interesting. I didn't know that
little cameo by Andre the Giants. The monster was a
creation of the people that made e t and there
was going to be Oh yeah. Another reason there was
going to be a sequel was Creditor foiled Conan three. Interesting.
If you're a fan of eighties movies and B movies,
you'll like this kind of stuff because there so the
third Conyan this is crazy that was going to be
made was turned into Cole the Cronker. If you've seen Cole,
that awful B movie which I think Riff Tracks has done.
Coal now or they were going to do Cole. That
was the last live one I think they were going
to do. I think they've done it Cole The Conqueror,
which has a early Liam Neeson spot in that film.
Liam Neeson is one of the one of his early roles.
Call the Conqueror is the original screenplay for Conan three.
The third Conan was going to be done again in
two thousand and two. It would have been called King
Conan Crown of Iron and it would have been the
Wolkowski sisters to direct it. So no Conan's and we'll
quickly move through this. And because this movie is for shipbirds, dude,
it's a shipbird movie. It is terrible. It was also believable. No,
I think it made money. I think you And that's
what see Arnold could make movies make money. That was
part of the reason why Arnold was. They knew he
could carry the plot and not the plot excuse you
definitely can't carry that. They knew he could carry the money.
And so he actually wasn't a big part of Red Sonya,
but they brought him in and shot scenes to put
him in, to make him a character to help salvage
what they thought would be a box office disaster, which
it was interesting facts. I love all this stuff, very fascinating.
And he's actually put into the poster when he has
this very small role, but he's put into the poster
to beef up the box office. This was still the
age when a single person could carry at the box office.
That's pretty crazy. There's a little bit of that left,
but not like it was in the eighties. And if
you watch, Arnold is a terrible actor, I mean hilariously bad.
He gets a better a little bit. It'll give us
some credit because he does get a little bit better,
But I mean I would play the Stogies clip. If
you haven't seen the Stogies clip, that's great. But I
can't play the Stogies clip because that's when I made
my joke video about bad videos. That one got flagged
for copyright. So I can't play the Stogies clip. But
you can go watch the Stogies clip on my Twitter
it's still scroll down a little bit you'll see the
Stogies clip. It's it's awesome. One of my favorite Arnold lines. Ever,
if you've not followed Jays Analysis over on the tweet stream,
be sure and follow on my Twitter there at Jay's
analysis as well as the Instagram and scroll down a
bit in the media section and you'll see the Stogies
clip Arnold on Stogy's one of the funniest clips I've
seen in a long time now. Arnold apparently thought that
acting was grunting and yelling. I'm not joking either, like
he really thought that. I think he thought that that's
what you do when you act. You just kind of
he thought that the word acting translated to acting out,
like acting crazy and grunting and you and so everything
is over the top, and that actually kind of makes
it more entertaining. It's like the story that I've told
many times about where when DVD commentaries were new and
he was watching, they were interviewing him for the DVD
commentary on something like Total Recall or something right not
like late nineties, early two thousands DVDs, and Arnold didn't
really get what DVD commentaries were going to be, and
so somebody needs to dig it up. I've heard it.
It's actually pretty funny. But he thought it was just
laughing and talking about what's happening, and so the DVD
commentaries aren't it's just him going.
Speaker 12: Ha look dah ha, what am I doing? This guy
fucking crazy ha wow. And there's no DVD commentary.
Speaker 1: It's just him like laughing at the scenes, which is
actually itself pretty damn funny. So I think it's on
total recall. But if somebody can dig that up, please
dig that up. That's really funny. I saw it ten
years ago on YouTube. Who knows if it can be
dug up. But so in this one, we're going in reverse,
right in part two, we did Part three Red Sonja,
and now we're doing Conan the Destroyer. Conan has butt
hest hurt over the loss of San dald Bergemann, his babe.
And of course in Hyperborea hy Boia, you can't go
five miles without stumbling onto a lesbian witch queen or
into the tomb from Atlantis. I mean you literally you
can't go anywhere, like you're just stumbling over you know,
magical devices and lesbian witch queens, they're just everywhere. And
a lesbian witch queen wanders in and tells Arnold that
he she can give him his desires, she can give
him back sandel Bergmann, whom Darth Vader destroyed with a
snake arrow and by the way. The tomb where Arnold
got the sword. CROM's tomb is supposed to be an
ancient Atlantean tomb. I didn't learn that until this recent viewing.
If you read about the film, you'll find that that
that was in the screenplay. So there is in this
one a dreaming god, interesting dreaming god named Dagoth and
dey Goth is this three horned god who's missing his horn,
and the princess has been taken captive by a wizard.
This wizard has the ability to keep people in their
alpha wave state almost it's like they're in a sleep
state my control, and he seems to have the key
to the princess. The Virgin princesses subconscious and it takes
Arnold to free her from the wizard. There's a very
mind control esque scene where Arnold has to break the
mini mirrors, the shatter the mirror prison world by which
the wizard holds the princess captive. So there's a woke
sleep motif throughout all. This is what I'm trying to say,
a woke sleep motif which is very MK right. Only
Jenha the Princess, the Virgin Princess can touch the key
once again, only the princess can touch it. What is
this about exactly? And there is once again a sex
magic component to this, which we will find very clear
in Conan the Barbarian. The key unlocks the treasure. The
key is a jeweled horn. Hello, we know what that's
talking about, and we have In other words, the power
of magical virginity can be unlocked, and the princess is
to be sacrificed. Of course, Conan deals with all this right,
saves the princess. We all know what happens. Kind of
a no brainer, very paper thin plot. But they did
stick in a few of those esoteric elements right. By
the way, if you want to support Jayson now, just
feel free to with super chats, no super chest to night.
I guess you guys don't like the movie shows like
movies anymore? Oh my god, I have to quit. Is
there a picture of the horn? The horn of day Goth?
By the way, they just kind of mixed the different
gods right, Daygone day Goth. So you get your rights
and rituals. Make sure you get all your rights and
rituals down, Michael, troll your winch major and use your
fallic powers. Got a channel those fallic powers. What's up
one hundred and fifty five yards. Yes, boiler room tonight
nine o'clock we'll have boiler room Eastern. Be sure and
join us for boiler room. I hope you're enjoying our
breakdown of Conyan. I had a lot of people request
Conan for a long time. They're like, do Conyan the Barbarian?
Do Conan? And I do think that there is a
sex magic component to this, and it's going to be
most clear when we look at Conan the Destroyer the
original and we went in reverse because I wanted to
save the best for last, right. I want you guys
here for the final scene. Oliver Stone writes this, and
did you know that this was really supposed to be
a post apocalyptic way into the future thing. Yeah, that's
kind of weird, right, And then they decided we're not
doing that because it's gonna cost seventy million dollars and
we can shoot sword and sandal epics for way cheaper,
bro And they did some of the interesting facts about
Conan the Barbarian. Arnold was too buff and couldn't wield
his sword properly, so he had to slow down on
the royds and get less swolled dog, get a little
less swole like me, Get a little less swoll and
then you can wield your sword.
Speaker 6: Bro.
Speaker 1: They did give Arnold a lot of weapons training, a
lot of martial arts training, and horse riding lessons. So
he had to train with an eleven pround broad sword
for two hours a day for three months. And the
broad swords cost ten thousand dollars. I don't know why
they would cost.
Speaker 6: Ten thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: But who knows that these movie sites movie fact sites
are true. I don't know, but they make for great story.
It's right the Runes. By the way, Arnold did his
own stunts, which is commendable. That's pretty crazy because there's
actually some pretty interesting stunts in Conan the Barbarian, one
of which was very fascinating that we'll hear in a minute.
So the Runes on Conan's father's sword actually did translate.
The ruins translate to SOATHO no guilt? Ye who wields
this in the name of crime. Conan's response to the
Mongol General is one of the best lines. Of course,
it's Arnold's first line. The Mongold General says, what is
the media of life, and Arnold says, famously, cross.
Speaker 13: Your enemies, see them driven before you. Here the lamentations,
all the emen. That's a great line, all right.
Speaker 1: Oliver Stone set thet in the future in the Downfall
Civilization post apocalyptic nightmare, and it was going to be
a four hour saga with a bunch of creatures. It
would have cost the studio seventy million dollars and they
decided heck no. So John Millius came on board to
direct and rewrote much of oliver Stone's script. The future
setting was thankfully abandoned and the original timeline was restored
to save money. Arnold suffered a this is the crazy part,
a crippling back injury because he fell on a rock
in that dog scene, remember the dogs that are chasing
him before he falls into CROM's Atlantean tune. Arnold was
freaked out. That was real and Arnold thought those dogs
were going to bite him. Looks like they were going
to and so he actually fell off of the rocks
in his back. They actually created a few scenes in
the film to specifically mimic the artwork of Frank Frazetta.
Everybody knows who Frank Frazetta is, of course, uh, the
orgy chamber, the fulso doomed snake, and the fight scenes
when Conan gets his sword, it's supposed to be the
tomb of Chrome from Atlantis. And that's an interesting connection
because if you don't remember, at the very beginning, Conan's
dad tells him that, right, he tells him that, uh, yeah,
there's all these gods or whatever, and and don't worry
about all that trust and steel. So Arnold trusts and steel. Now,
the most fascinating fact of the whole movie is this,
which was that during the crucifixion scene, when Arnold is
hanging on the tree. I don't know if this is true,
but it makes for a great story, they used a
live vulture to peck at Arnold's boobies. Now, when Arnold
bites the neck, he pulls an assie. It was a
bloods he might it was a blood because he bites
an actual vulture and he spits the blood out and
the feathers out, and it says that they immediately had
to rinse Arnold's mouth to avoid disease. So Arnold literally
pulls an Aussie. That was a crazy movie fact. Now,
thank you for those superchants. We'll get to those in
a minute. Be sure, of course you can now, of
course also, of course, of course horses. Of course, of course,
subscribe to Jay's analysis through the join button there. If
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The basis of a TV show called Hollywood to Code.
You can also watch that a Guy TV. Now, when
we cut to the meat, the meat the goblet, I mean,
I'm talking about meat off of a sword. Meat, we
get to Conan the Destroyer. This is where it gets
really cool. Now it begins with a quote from Nietzsche,
right Wild to power. Nietzsche. If you don't know about him,
Fred nietzschee that which has not hurt me only makes
me stronger, which is a Kelly Clarkson song. So thank
you too, Kelly Cromson, Kelly Crime for popularizing the Nietzsche phrase,
the famous Niche quote Nietsche Clarkson, Nietzsche, Crompson, Kelly Cromson.
We have another China man's sidekick. Of course in the eighties,
gotta have a China and sidekick. Chrom is a personal
god and he's related to the time of the Giants.
There was a time of chaos, out of which order
sprang Chrome goes back to Atlantis. As I said, this
is at the beginning sequence when his father's telling him
about the importance of the sword. The gods left this
secret of iron to men. Men are derived their power
from knowing the secrets of iron. Genesis six kind of stuff,
you know, Book of Enich type stuff. Right, The klan
who has raped and pillaged Arne's village raped in pillage
Arne's village is the double headed snake Klan. So here
we have the serpentine David Ike worldview, the cheetah Uri,
and we have the death of the mother. Right are loose.
There's another traumatic scenery, traumatonization and actually trauma again. This
plays into both this one and the next one, right,
because well, all three of the characters are traumatized, and
I think that makes a little more sense when we
get to the trauma based mind control of the princess
in Conan two that we just covered, right, But Arnold
is traumatized, and that's going to play into it later
because False Doom is going to try to use that
as his trigger, right, He's going to try to trigger
Conan when they confront one another. Now, if you didn't know,
False Doom has art hole bangs, and this is what
makes him exceptionally evil. If you don't know what an
art ho is, go look up the art hole meme
and my recent videos where I make front of artims.
But he definitely has art ho banks and he does
fancy himself kind of a deep arto of sorts, does
he not? Yes, he does, because there is an aesthetic
to the snake cult. And he's actually spoken of as
a demigod. Did you notice that that Tulsa Doom is
a called a demigod? Right because maxivon sideal, who's the
king whose daughter has been kidnapped by Thulse Doom says,
I'm sick of this Demi God. Can you go take
care of Tulsa Doom. Now, guess what this cult does.
They traffic in kids. They still kids, don't they. Well,
this is starting to sound real. So they still kids.
They traumatize them, and they turn them into hippies. Did
you notice it's a hippie cult. So you have like
a hippie exterior of flower power tards that are run
in secret. Buy a bunch of luciferian serpentine cannibalistic snake worshippers.
Is Oliver Stone telling us about Hollywood? Perhaps sounds like it.
So they still kids. They put Arnold to work, like Samson,
get your ass to the mill, grind on that thing,
grind that mill for the next twenty years. Arnold the
wheel of time, the wheel of struggle, the wheel of history. Right,
it's a very Nietzschean kind of concept. Right, So Arnold
grinds away at the wheel of time. And it's almost
like a clock you see, which is interesting scenery. It's
almost like a nineties exercise equipment type of thing, body
by wheel or something. And it's very very similar if
you've seen the Hollywood Sampson movie from you know, the
fifties or whatever. It's very reminiscent of the scene where
Samson grinding the wheel. There are quite a few Biblical
references sprinkled throughout this, by the way, obviously the crucifixion scene,
but there's also a Deaf Baryl resurrection motif when it
comes to Arnold two. Now, Arnold then is recruited into
becoming a gladiator. He learns the ways of pagan atheism.
Might is right, right, We see this sort of dialecticism
in paganism, which is ultimately kind of dialect I mean
not just it's it's atheistic. Paganism is ultimately subjectivist, relativists
and atheistic because the gods aren't really real and they
just kind of stand for virtues or valor or whatever, right,
and so you just kind of make it up as
you go and you follow your different online pagan figures.
So paganism is a form of relativism, and that actually
comes up. And the best part when we what are
Arnold's first lines? Literally for the whole three five minutes,
Arnold's first lines are grunts. For minutes on end. He
grunts and grunts and grunts and grunts and grunts. And
I think they told him that Arnold, if you can't
read your lines, grunt your lines, and he was actually
going to be the narrator. Did you know that they
ended up having to use Maco, the Asian guy, because
Arnold couldn't read the lines. I'm not joking. So he
becomes a gladiator, and eventually this hardens Arnold into conan,
into believing that life is death and death is life.
You know the same, right, He says something to this effect.
So then he's taken to the East. And this is
fascinating because he goes all the way to the east
to learn the Eastern mysteries. And he's initiated into the
Eastern mysteries. So he learns philosophy, which is interesting. Arnold
is a philosopher. He learns let and he learns the
ways of women. He learns the ways of women, and
all the Eastern men like to watch as Arnold learns
the ways of women. It's a funny scene. And he's
bred to the finest stock, right, So we have this
sort of eugenesis motif here, and then we have the
Mongol question what is the meaning of life? And again
I read it earlier, I won't repeat it. The great line. Now,
remember Chrome is an ancient king and he is a
successor from Atlantis, and he kind of chooses mystically speaking,
Arnold to be his successor as the new king, sort
of directly anointed. And Kanan is the king of thieves,
which is interesting. He's actually kind of a low class
sort of dude who feveries his way into the upper class,
as we'll see, and he becomes very wealthy doing this. Now,
the symbol is interesting because the symbol that Arnold is
seeking this whole time is the double headed snake symbol,
the sun, the moon, the black sun, the black moon,
which is fascinating because it's very similar to the crusier
of the Orthodox bishop synt That fascinating. Did you know that?
Now people will say the low iq nor Megellical's evangelicfish
will say that is a Satanic stamba because you got
two different snakes on a bishop's paul. That's Satanism. Uh,
that is not what that symbol means. Goofball, that is
Moses' stuph That's what that means. But everything to do
with snake gods. The cross is the bronze hole that
Moses put the serpents on. If you read John three,
Jesus explains to Nicodemus the meaning of this symbol and goufas.
Evangelicals just don't know what symbols mean. They think that
symbols always mean the same thing in the exact same
context at all times. And that's not true. Symbols are polyvalent.
That means they have different levels of meaning. So here
in this context, if you read numbers, you'll know that
Believi's number is fifteen sixteen, where the bronze serpent incident
drives the snakes away. And in the Orthodox bishop's crozier
you see the cross is identified with the bronze serpent
pole of Moses. Now, in the context of Darth Vader
snake cult, it's very different. Let's see, let's get an
image of falsea doom symbol. Here we go. You'll see
that it's and by the way, it is explicitly satanic.
Now I don't say that because I'm importing my evangelical
doctrine of what shading is. To the no. No, it's
he's identified as Set. If you pay attention to the movie,
to the screenplay, false doomas is identified with Set. His
cult is the Set cult, which is fascinating. And you
see there that the black sun is also a moon,
which is fascinating, right, and then you have the double
headed snake. Now again, the cult is a hippie cult, right.
They have a loving, peaceful exterior with a bunch of
kind of hardy Krishna looking Goophis's walking around throwing flowers everywhere.
And there's a really hilarious not PC scene where Arnold
is trying to infiltrate the cult to get up to
fulse doom and one of the less than straight priests
of the cult makes a move on Arnold, and Arnold
plays along for a minute. Instance, Ah, I'm very shy.
Could we go in private? Right? And they walk in
private and Arnold conks him and takes the priestly garbs.
Not PC, it's not PC, but it's just fascinating that
once again, I really want to stress that the cult
in the movie has the hippie exterior with the interior
of the total mind control stuff, which is literally how
the hippie stuff is, right, the real inner structure of
the hippies, right, and the CIA mind control from Tim
Leary who was tim Leary's number one guy Crowley, right,
Larry said you can thank the CIA for the whole
counterculture of the sixties. And by the way, I am
the new incarnation and annoints the successor of Crole. He
says that in the interviews, now back to my notes here.
So Arnold, as I said, you just stumble around in
Hyborea for a little while, you'll eventually fall into a
tomb or upon a bunch of orgies or lesbian witches.
And he finds the sword that he needs, and then
he happens upon a banshee. They have sex magic, and
yes it's sex magic because at the point of the
Kulitis the banshee gets possessed once again, we're back at
the Krohleian level stuff. And she prophesies that what Arnold
is going to do right Zamora is her name, the witch,
and she prophesies that one will come from the north,
the servant of Crome from Valhalla, to destroy the snake cult.
There's also an a Nietzschean element to the film too,
with the fact that Falsa Doom's cult is it's a
bunch of priests, and this plays into Nietzsche's idea of
like genealogy of morals and where morals quote unquote come
from and Nietzsche thinks that in the ancient world, the
priest class is really who had the power, and that
they were the power behind the throne, and they could
kind of hold everybody captive to the priestly ruse and
deception that they foisted. And so Nietzsche is a great
quote at the beginning because it kind of gives credence
to the idea that the warrior class right is set
over against the priest class because the priest class is
very corrupt, which is true. I mean, we can give
Nietzsche some credit there because many cases and many times
in history that's obviously true. The priest classes totally corrupt
and degenerate like our day. Hello, but when they now,
by the way, you can just also just sort of
stumble upon all of your your fellow quest comrades. You
just stumble upon, like you just walk around and you
meet your Asian sidekick. You just stumble around and you
meet you find your magic sword. You stumble around and
you find your blonde lover. I don't know what she is,
we don't know where she's She just kind of stumbles
into the scene. Oh, by the way, hey, what's up
doing to go in there? And steal some shit. That's
literally how he meets her, and so they infiltrate the
Temple of Set. It's called the Temple of Set, and
there are the snaked deceivers as they're called. By the way,
crom Crui, upon which most people think Chrome Conan's god
is based, crom Krua actually did require human sacrifice, which
I've always thought was amusing because you watch the movie
and you think, oh, Arnold is there to put an
end to the cannibalism and the human sacrifice of the
snake cult. But it turns out that in Irish Gaelic history,
Crome Cruis was a human sacrifice god that Saint Patrick
booted right when Saint Patrick christianized Ireland get rid of
the human sacrifice crom krue cult. By the way, that
there's a great scene where Arnold gets drunk and where
he begins to get wealthy and lazy, and he's offered
a bevy of women. And by the way, in the
ancient Hyborian world they did know the term sluts, right,
And so he's offered a bevy of women and he
says dal sluts and then he bunk knocks a camel
out literally knocks the camel out after saying, all the
women are sluts. Pretty based. Actually, I'd like to punch
a camel and call a bunch of women's sluts. That
sounds pretty based. They enter the Tower of the Serpent
to look for the eye of the Serpent. This is
interesting because watch my Mandy review, because in my analysis
of Mandy, I go into the idea of the symbolic
meaning of the eye of the serpent. So you have
to go over and find my Mandy in a cage
Mandy analysis to see what I think the eye of
the Serpent refers to. Now they wreak some havoc up
in here. They get rid of the cheeseball. Actually the
snake is not too bad, right, because it's I mean,
it's an animatronic puppet snake, But it's not that bad.
It's actually it looks pretty good. They get rid of
all that cleaning, all that up, and we see for
the first time the all seeing eye, the Ulsa Doom's
symbol is all so in all saying, ay, it's not
just the double headed snake with the black son. Think
of the ancient black son idea which came up in
the Midsummer analysis. Go watch My Midsummer Analysis by the way,
for there, because there was a scant subtle reference to
the Black Sun. Now. Falsodam of course runs a sex
cult and he wants vestal virgins. We also see the
or Borros president here. All seeing I in the background,
I think Stone is all think Oliver Stone is telling
us something a long time ago, right. He was probably
like bruh, I told you all what was going on
long time ago. None of y'all caught it, noney all
understood what was going on. Stogy's if you've watched my
Stogies clip, not mine everything is terrible Stogy clip, but
go watch the Stoge clip and that's exactly that's exactly
how he sounds. It's also a mind control cult enter
in the mind control So Thalsea Doom knows not just
how to run shit, right, but he also knows how
to mind control. He has mind controlled the daughter of
the king. Maxwell saidaw and brought her into his hippie
cult and he's got her under his spell. So there's
a cult that runs stuff. They do human sacrifice, traffic people, kids,
They worship snake gods, They mind control. They have an
underground base and a mountain of power. It's almost like,
do we actually live in that world of Hyborea? And
the answer is yes, I was just bewitched by a
lesbian witch queen tonight. I'm joking. I did find this
plastic sword in CROM's Atlantean dungeon. By the way, the
cult looks kind of like Oh Show's cult. By the way,
if you notice that, which is fascinating. Now, in order
to join the cult, you have to go through mystical
stages of attaining total emptiness. Where have we heard that?
Like I said, it's a new age created Eastern cult,
and you go through total emptiness so that you lose
all your willpower, all your faculties, and you just submit
to whatever tools. The doom says. It's a mind control cult,
a mind control cult with an all seeing eye at
the top of it. Oh yeah, Now, Arnold isn't just
an Arnold character. He's also a christ Like character, which
is fascinating because he's sentenced after he tries to infiltrate
the cult. He's sentenced to hanging on the tree of
what oh in a crucifixion, right, So he becomes a
christlike type of figure and he's kind of mineft by
Thulsa Doom because Ulso Done says, dude, you wouldn't be
you if it wasn't for all the trauma I inflicted
on you. So you owe me a thanks, right, And
that's kind of the abuser abuse the relationship.
Speaker 6: Right.
Speaker 1: The abuser is always saying, I've only made you stronger,
I've only helped you. You should thank me for all
my abuse, right, gaslighting type stuff. Right, And we see
the power of the mind control clt because Thulsa Doom
quite literally says, allow me to show you. Come to me,
Come come to me, my child. Come to me, Come
to me my child. Right, and the girl just sort
of walks off the cliff and power mind control cults. Now,
Arnold undergoes his death barrel resurrection ritual. He pulls an
Aussie and bites the next of the vultures. In reality,
we're told he dies sort of, but the ritual of
Maco brings him back or doesn't allow him to fully die.
He's kind of in between states. But we have a
kind of death brow resurrection ritual and Arnold is then
able to return and take out false Doom. And in
the end, what's interesting is that. I guess we could
debate the meaning of the end. We kind of have
the idea that of what his dad told him at
the beginning? Are the gods just men? By the way,
there's a cannibal cult aspect of this, dude, did you
notice that in the Mytlanta Green Peace soup that Thulsa
Doom's cooking up, there's hands and body parts. So it's
a cannibal cult that uses sex, magic and traffics people
and sacrifices them. It sounds like thualset or something, right.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And so in the end, when Arnold saves the princess,
the princess sort of bows to him and he's kind
of like, yeah, whatever, right, he burns down the snake temple.
So is the meaning of the movie the Gods of Men?
Is that what the meaning movie means? Or is it
christ like symbology? Interesting, that's up for you. I guess Now.
We will have a boiler room in an hour, so
stick around if you're interested. Uh, we'll be backstreaming the
bridle Room right clime crime Stags, and I hope you
enjoyed my brief analysis. By the way, I got a
treat for you guess what. Guess what next episode is
gonna be gotta treat. For many, many years, we've had
the request, bro, when you gonna cover some Val Kilmer,
and I have to say I've been negligent. I've been
lax in covering the gods. I'm mad I've been laxing
covering Val Kilmer. The great, great, great great Val Kilmer.
Love Valcomer. Belcomber is great. Mad Martigan, Willow Willow, you
all great, Mad Marnigan. So treat next show. I don't know,
two or three days, I'll put the show show up.
The Saint, Willow, Willow and Batman Forever a vow triple feature.
Thou killing it. We're gonna kill it with the Kilmer
in the next episode. So here's your homework. Movie nerds.
The Saint one of my favorite nineties movies. The Saint
one of my favorites. I love The Saint. It's great,
Willow and Batman forever. You're watching Jay on film. I
don't have a name for this show yet. I don't
know what the name of this is, so we're just
calling it whatever. The show that has no name. It's
not Usltarch Hollywood, although we still do have the Esotarch
Element's not what yes we do, but yes. So next
time up to the Saint Willo Batman Forever. Thank you
for watching the Conan Trilogy loose trilogy sort of trilogy.
Next up, Yes, val Vowel killing It the Vowel triple feature.
Please do your homework. It'll make the show a lot
more entertaining if you are remembering the facts so that
when I quote the lines and do the voices, you'll
be like, hahaha, that's very funny that you know the
lines and can do the voices. I just heard them,
Josh for five dollars crime. Yes, Maral Kark's nine ninety nine.
Tell me more about these phallic powers. I'm not like you.
Ah ah. Stogs stogies are phallic. So the answer to
the question about the phallic powers is in the Arnold
clip on my twitter about stogies. That's your other homework.
Go to my tweet tweeter grew it to me tree
Eater and find under the media here it is right
here under media there's the Arnold clip. It's one of
the greatest clips of all time. By the way, make
that go viral or something. Give me a zillion followers. Yeah,
and then you'll Marl Karks. You will understand the phallic
powers when you watch Arnold explain stogies to you, because
stogies are phelic g ten dollars. My god laughs, such
your god, he lasts from his mountain. Or was that
the line of.
Speaker 13: Oh, that's a thuls the Doom's line, right, come to me,
Come come to me, Vattalic Kramelski, five dollars, Thank you,
Thank you, Vatal.
Speaker 1: Always appreciate your support and everybody's support for the New Incarnation.
The second episode, well, actually we've kind of been doing
this style for multiple shows, haven't we. I mean, you
can go back to when I did Lethal Weapon, which
the out you know, the Eddie Murphy eighties cop Buddy Cop.
I did a Buddy Cop episode and the algorithm killed it.
I did Blade Monster Squad Lost Boys, and the algorithm
didn't like that. I thought that was one of the best.
That was a lot of fun. I love that one.
But you can go find all those which, for whatever reason,
the algorithm didn't like, which is annoying, But you can
go find those. Don't go to church with James Earl
Jones because it's a snake cult. Don't go to Thulsa
Doom's church. That's the other that's the other takeaway. Right wise,
words and takeaway. Don't go to James Earl Jones's church.
Other Wise words other takeaway. Don't date read Son Justice
Warriors because you're not gonna get anywhere. You're You're not
gonna get any unless you can beat her in handhand combat.
Uh yeah, I think that's it for today. Definitely get
your copies of Esoltery Hollywood that are covering up my
face one and two. Go to the shop at Jays Analysis.
If you have not got your copies, allow me to
remind you. You can get signed copies at Jays Analysis.
Don't get it from Amazon. Don't give your money to
Jeff Bozos. Give your money to me. I mean, do
you see Jeff Bozos dressed up like a barbarian quoting
Arnold to you?
Speaker 8: No?
Speaker 1: What's he doing? Nothing? Messing everything up? Right? Come on,
come on, here is the link by the way in
the chat right now to get your copy of besseltaur
Cally what in the shop at Jay'sonalysis? All right, stay
tuned for a boilerroom. I don't know who's on boilroom tonight.
Don't know what our topics are, but you know it's
gonna be great boiler room in one hour roughly probably
an hour. Yeah, and thank you guys, and I hope
you enjoyed. Conyan, please share this smash the light button.
You know, algorithms are not favoring people doing independent content,
so now we really need you guys to share the
content because if you don't, then it's just gonna dry
up and you're gonna just all be sitting back there
watching crappy mainstream content again. So please support. You have
to support us people doing the independent content, or else
it's just gonna go away and it's gonna we're gonna
have to be watching a munch of mainstream garbage again.
So support us, support your independent creators. Don't give your
money to the big zillion dollar corporations that want to
destroy you. God bless everybody, Have a good night, and
and be looking in the next few days for the
Vowel Triple feature.