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<v Speaker 1>In the studio with me now is the executive director

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<v Speaker 1>of an organization that I want you to pay attention

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<v Speaker 1>to because we've talked about on the show before that Colorado,

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<v Speaker 1>like it or not, is a pro choice state.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, full stop.

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<v Speaker 1>There's no polling day to the shows that it is

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<v Speaker 1>anything but a majority pro choice state. Does that mean

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<v Speaker 1>if your pro life you should just throw in the

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<v Speaker 1>towel and just call it a day.

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<v Speaker 2>No, it doesn't.

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<v Speaker 1>But it means that any time energy or effort you

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<v Speaker 1>spend trying to limit abortion in Colorado is going to

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<v Speaker 1>be wasted.

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<v Speaker 2>The only way to.

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<v Speaker 1>Limit abortion in Colorado is to give women an alternative

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<v Speaker 1>that would support them in a pregnancy that maybe they

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<v Speaker 1>were not prepared for. And that's why I have Ashley

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<v Speaker 1>Graves in the studio with me right now from Alternatives

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<v Speaker 1>Pregnancy Center.

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<v Speaker 2>First of all, Ashley, welcome to the show. Thank you

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<v Speaker 2>very much. I'm glad to be here.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I'm glad to have you, and I honestly vaguely

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<v Speaker 1>familiar with the Alternatives Pregnancy Center, mostly because things that

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<v Speaker 1>listeners have sent me. We have people that are listening audience,

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<v Speaker 1>we have a lot of pro choice people are at

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<v Speaker 1>our listening audience. We have a lot of pro life

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<v Speaker 1>people in our listening audience, and even I would think

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<v Speaker 1>that a vast majority of the pro choice people in

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<v Speaker 1>this listening audience would love to think that when truly

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<v Speaker 1>do have a choice right, that it's not just the

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<v Speaker 1>choice part only means choosing an abortion. So tell me

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<v Speaker 1>a little bit about what Alternatives Pregnancy Center does what

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<v Speaker 1>you provide, and not just about abortion.

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<v Speaker 2>You guys do a whole bunch of stuff. Tell me

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<v Speaker 2>about that absolutely.

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<v Speaker 3>So we walk beside women and men that find themselves

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<v Speaker 3>in the complexity of an unplaned pregnancy. And like our

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<v Speaker 3>doctor's appointments are our nurse appointments, they're an hour long.

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<v Speaker 3>When was the last time you went to a doctor

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<v Speaker 3>and you got an hour long appointment? And we sit

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<v Speaker 3>with them and we look at the whole human being,

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<v Speaker 3>the whole person mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. What is

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<v Speaker 3>going on? How can we walk with them? We show

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<v Speaker 3>them there's other alternatives. We don't beat them into a decision,

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<v Speaker 3>We love on them, We give them infirmation.

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<v Speaker 2>The other thing that honestly.

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<v Speaker 3>A lot of pro choice people have supported is we

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<v Speaker 3>walk beside them till the baby's a year old. We

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<v Speaker 3>do mentoring, We have fatherhood mentoring. Wow, like that's been huge.

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<v Speaker 3>And then we also have counseling after abortion, and that

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<v Speaker 3>those pieces, even pro choice people can't be upset about

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<v Speaker 3>because we're still walking with these individuals.

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<v Speaker 2>We don't drop them off.

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<v Speaker 3>We still love on them, and if they choose to

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<v Speaker 3>have an abortion, we still love them. We want them

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<v Speaker 3>to have counseling, healing all of them.

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<v Speaker 1>You have them to be making an informed choice, absolutely,

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<v Speaker 1>and that is something And I've never had to make

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<v Speaker 1>this decision, and I'm very grateful that I never found

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<v Speaker 1>myself in this position. But boy do I know a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of women that have found themselves in this position.

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<v Speaker 1>And in my friend group, I have women who have

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<v Speaker 1>made all different choices. I have had women who decided,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna have this baby, I'm gonna keep this baby.

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<v Speaker 1>I have friends who have decided I'm gonna have this

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<v Speaker 1>baby and give it to a family that can provide

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<v Speaker 1>about her home. And I have friends that have chosen

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<v Speaker 1>to have an abortion. But what I find the most

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<v Speaker 1>striking is that all of them, at some point have

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<v Speaker 1>talked about that decision. And the two that actually gave

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<v Speaker 1>birth to that baby. Have never regretted it. And I'm

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<v Speaker 1>not saying every friend I have who's had an abortion

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<v Speaker 1>regrets it. That would be inaccurate, that would be a lie.

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<v Speaker 1>But the friends that have had it, more than one

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<v Speaker 1>has said later that was the worst choice ever made, right,

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<v Speaker 1>But they.

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<v Speaker 3>Didn't feel like they had a choice, and they maybe

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<v Speaker 3>didn't feel like there's someone to listen or someone to

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<v Speaker 3>talk out the process with, or maybe even ten years

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<v Speaker 3>down the road, did they find someone to talk with.

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<v Speaker 3>I personally was counseled to abort my oldest child. She

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<v Speaker 3>was testing high for Down syndrome right and we were

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<v Speaker 3>at Texas Tech Medical Center and in genetic counseling, and

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<v Speaker 3>she said, we're giving you this information and so you

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<v Speaker 3>have the information in case you and to terminate their pregnancy.

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<v Speaker 3>And my husband and I looked at her in complete shock.

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<v Speaker 3>And then we go for the next set of testing.

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<v Speaker 3>They offered us termination yet again. And if she would

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<v Speaker 3>have been Down syndrome, we would have loved her completely

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<v Speaker 3>and totally. That she has come out this genius and

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<v Speaker 3>this amazing woman of like that we would have missed.

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<v Speaker 3>We would have missed her voice.

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<v Speaker 1>Because I was of advanced maternal age when I had

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<v Speaker 1>my daughter, and my husband was five years older than

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<v Speaker 1>I was. In our first meeting with our midwife, they said, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>do you want to do genetic testing? And I said, well,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, I in the course of this, if we

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<v Speaker 1>find out there's something severely wrong, we can talk. But

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<v Speaker 1>if we have a child with Down syndrome, we've already

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<v Speaker 1>talked about it because we're older and we're okay with

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<v Speaker 1>that and we don't want to hear about termination again.

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<v Speaker 1>And our doctors, to their credit, said, no problem, marked

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<v Speaker 1>it down, said we're not going to talk about this again.

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<v Speaker 1>But there is a tremendous amount of pressure now and

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<v Speaker 1>those tests are not always accurate.

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<v Speaker 3>They are not they have and then I've heard recently

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<v Speaker 3>they're like, ashulely, the tests are better. But a young

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<v Speaker 3>woman that I've walked beside since she was fifteen years old,

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<v Speaker 3>she in the last two years got a false positive

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<v Speaker 3>and I'm like.

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<v Speaker 2>They're not that much better. You can't just trust that information.

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<v Speaker 1>So yeah, now, when someone comes to the Alternative's pregnancy Center,

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<v Speaker 1>walk me through that process. I've always thought, and maybe

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<v Speaker 1>I'm wrong about this, are people that tend to gravitate

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<v Speaker 1>towards a place called Alternatives Pregnancy Center. Maybe they're already

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<v Speaker 1>questioning if they're going to walk that path on abortion.

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<v Speaker 1>Maybe they want to be talked out of it.

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<v Speaker 2>Right? Is that accurate? Not always?

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<v Speaker 3>Sometimes they come in very determined, like they have already

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<v Speaker 3>made their mind.

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<v Speaker 2>A they want an abortion, Okay.

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<v Speaker 3>They come to us, We sit them down and we

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<v Speaker 3>do a medical grade pregnancy test with our ns, and

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<v Speaker 3>we talk through what's going on in your life right now?

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<v Speaker 3>What are you feeling, what is happening? Why are you

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<v Speaker 3>feeling anxiety about this right now? We find out a

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<v Speaker 3>lot of information, and it's amazing how often we open

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<v Speaker 3>the door for additional resources they didn't know they could get.

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<v Speaker 3>We are experts on what's available in the counties and

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<v Speaker 3>what resources are available to them.

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<v Speaker 2>A lot of them.

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<v Speaker 3>It may be I don't have housing, How can I

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<v Speaker 3>have this baby?

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<v Speaker 2>Right?

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<v Speaker 3>Let us open the door to some organizations that can help.

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<v Speaker 3>My partner is abusing me, How can I have this baby?

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<v Speaker 3>We aren't experts on domestic violence, but we know who is. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 3>and that is our goal to know who are the

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<v Speaker 3>experts that can walk with these women and empower them

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<v Speaker 3>so they don't feel so trapped.

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<v Speaker 1>And a lot of people just in general don't recognize

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<v Speaker 1>or realize how many organizations exist, and our organizations like

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<v Speaker 1>you that can kind of act as a clearinghouse to

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<v Speaker 1>help get over some of those big hurdles that people

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<v Speaker 1>are expressing and truly giving them a choice.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, that's what this is all about.

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<v Speaker 3>Because they feel so trapped, right, I mean they feel

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<v Speaker 3>trapped when they come to see us. Nine out of

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<v Speaker 3>ten times, if you look at them and say you

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<v Speaker 3>are not alone, We're here to walk beside you, immediately

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<v Speaker 3>we see tears.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, because they feel so alone. Right.

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<v Speaker 3>We even help them role play on how to talk

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<v Speaker 3>to their partner, how to talk to you. We had

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<v Speaker 3>a situation on how to talk to their parents. We

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<v Speaker 3>do role playing with them. We just give them the

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<v Speaker 3>dedicated time they need to process this information. One other

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<v Speaker 3>thing I didn't mention earlier is we do free STD

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<v Speaker 3>testing for women as well and treatment, and we follow

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<v Speaker 3>that up with STD counseling as well to kind of

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<v Speaker 3>educate and be like, why do we keep getting in

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<v Speaker 3>this situation?

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<v Speaker 1>Right?

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<v Speaker 3>What's going on behind you? Coming to see us so often?

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<v Speaker 3>Not ever a place from judgment. I can never judge anyone, right,

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<v Speaker 3>but from a place of love and hope. And we

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<v Speaker 3>want to help you find some answers.

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<v Speaker 1>Right right, And you know, I mean ultimately in my mind.

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<v Speaker 1>And I know it sounds a little patronizing, but helping

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<v Speaker 1>someone learn how to make better decisions when they've been

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<v Speaker 1>making the same wrong decision over and over and over again,

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<v Speaker 1>it's really a powerful medicine in and of itself. Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>So do you guys also offer well women care and

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<v Speaker 1>things of that nature?

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<v Speaker 2>Or is this we are tilted towards it? Oh, we are.

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<v Speaker 3>That is the long term goal. We are heading in

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<v Speaker 3>that direction. But we are funded by individuals. I am

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<v Speaker 3>over seventy five percent of our funding comes from individuals

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<v Speaker 3>and churches. So we do not receive any state or

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<v Speaker 3>federal funding and that makes it difficult. We have to

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<v Speaker 3>fund raise.

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<v Speaker 1>Why is that, without getting too deep into the weeds

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<v Speaker 1>on politics stuff, why is it that you do choose

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<v Speaker 1>not to take federal dollars because of the strings that

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<v Speaker 1>may be attached, or is it federal dollars are not

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<v Speaker 1>necessarily flowing towards organizations that are focused on life.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, the second one, for sure, they don't have many

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<v Speaker 3>flowing towards us. But secondly, a lot of times when

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<v Speaker 3>we apply for those, the second they find out we're

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<v Speaker 3>pro life, they don't want to work with us. And

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<v Speaker 3>I would also say a lot of times there's a

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<v Speaker 3>lot of hoops. I know some organizations that do receive

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<v Speaker 3>federal and state funding and they actually have to hire

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<v Speaker 3>another staff just to manage that, just for fulfillment.

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<v Speaker 1>And then there's all kinds of every every piece of

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<v Speaker 1>tax money that is given out comes with strings. Absolutely,

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<v Speaker 1>and maybe they're they're blatant strings, but maybe they are

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<v Speaker 1>just pressure, or maybe they're pressure that doesn't even appear

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<v Speaker 1>for years.

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<v Speaker 2>Yes, right as.

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<v Speaker 1>Things change or shift.

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<v Speaker 2>What are you guys seeing?

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<v Speaker 1>And mentioned it right at the beginning of the interview,

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm talking right now with Ashley Graves from the

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<v Speaker 1>Alternative's Pregnancy Center. Colorado is a staunchly pro choice state.

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<v Speaker 1>They have indicated it over and over and over and

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<v Speaker 1>over and over again at the ballot box.

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<v Speaker 2>There's no question about it.

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<v Speaker 1>So I have often told my listeners who are frustrated

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<v Speaker 1>pro lifers who believe that a child is a child,

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<v Speaker 1>no matter if it's a you know, little tiny zeyegoat

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<v Speaker 1>child or a nine month old child that's ready to

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<v Speaker 1>be born. This is the kind of stuff that I

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<v Speaker 1>would love to have you direct your time and energy

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<v Speaker 1>and your money to, because the only way to slow

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<v Speaker 1>down the rate of abortion anywhere is to let women

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<v Speaker 1>know that there are alternatives.

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely.

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<v Speaker 1>You know, what are you guys seeing just on the

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<v Speaker 1>landscape in terms of you know, do you feel like

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<v Speaker 1>people's hearts are changing at all? Because I try to

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<v Speaker 1>gauge it and it's so hard. I want to see

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<v Speaker 1>the window that I want to see the world through.

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<v Speaker 1>Right Where are you guys seeing this?

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<v Speaker 3>I would say the younger generation behind us is looking

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<v Speaker 3>at it. My daughter's generation, they're twenty and twenty five.

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<v Speaker 3>They are seeing some of the after effects of abortion,

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<v Speaker 3>and especially the chemical abortion, yeah, and the trauma that

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<v Speaker 3>goes with that, and I think they're going to be

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<v Speaker 3>the generation to speak up and go, this is not okay.

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<v Speaker 3>This is actually doing more harm than good. And so

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<v Speaker 3>that is definitely I think the generations that are getting

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<v Speaker 3>more educated on the trauma. The abortion pill brings a

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<v Speaker 3>lot of trauma with it, and we don't need to

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<v Speaker 3>get to that, but it does.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a very dramatic process, and people think it's no

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<v Speaker 1>big deal. I'm going to take this, and you know,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know what they think is going to happen,

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<v Speaker 1>but it's a very dramatic process. It's not just a

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<v Speaker 1>no big deal type thing as it's often made out

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<v Speaker 1>to be. I don't know, So, Ashley, how did you

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<v Speaker 1>get into this field?

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<v Speaker 3>Honestly, I have always discipled young women. I've always walked

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<v Speaker 3>beside young women. I don't have the prettiest testimony. I

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<v Speaker 3>don't have the prettiest backstory, and there wasn't someone to

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<v Speaker 3>walk with me. And so we ended up in an

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<v Speaker 3>area and the pregnancy Resource center needed a director and

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<v Speaker 3>my husband was the one that said, you have to

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<v Speaker 3>apply for this. This is for young women, this is you.

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<v Speaker 3>And that's what I love about what we do because

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<v Speaker 3>to me, it's.

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<v Speaker 2>Pro woman right, it's empowering women.

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<v Speaker 3>And I was an executive director in Texas for over

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<v Speaker 3>eight years and then I stepped out and became a

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<v Speaker 3>consultant to pregnancy resource centers because we were losing so

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<v Speaker 3>many leaders due to burnout, right exhaustion, all the things.

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<v Speaker 3>And then a recruiter found me here for Denver and

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<v Speaker 3>I'm never in a million years thought I would leave

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<v Speaker 3>Texas for Denver, Colorado. But my husband and I have

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<v Speaker 3>a saying you go until you get a no, and

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<v Speaker 3>we just kept getting a yes after a yes. And

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<v Speaker 3>now in September eleventh, they'll be here a full year.

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<v Speaker 1>That's fantastic. That's absolutely fantastic. You know, when you are

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<v Speaker 1>talking with young women, and you're obviously talking with young women,

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<v Speaker 1>maybe not you directly, but the people you have a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of different counselors and things of that nature. When

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<v Speaker 1>you're talking to these young women. I mean, I can

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<v Speaker 1>only imagine the fear that must come across. How do

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<v Speaker 1>you say to someone, I'm too scared to do this.

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<v Speaker 1>It's too frightening. There's too many barriers in my way.

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<v Speaker 1>How do you say on a one to one basis, Like,

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<v Speaker 1>what do you say to someone to say, I really

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<v Speaker 1>think you should have this baby. It's your choice, but

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<v Speaker 1>you got to you know, thinking over.

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<v Speaker 3>We actually say tell us what the obstacles are, so

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<v Speaker 3>we you will never hear one of our advocates say

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<v Speaker 3>we think you should do this right, that's never going

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<v Speaker 3>to come out of our mouth.

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<v Speaker 2>But I will say, by and large, we're seeing housing

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<v Speaker 2>that's a that's the biggest one.

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<v Speaker 3>It's probably the largest one of how can I have

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<v Speaker 3>another child? I'm currently sleeping in my car or I'm

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<v Speaker 3>sleeping on someone's couch.

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<v Speaker 2>How can I have a child?

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<v Speaker 3>Housing is a huge one, and so we look into

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<v Speaker 3>that and we're like, you know what, we partner with

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<v Speaker 3>some incredible organizations. Let's see if we can help you

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<v Speaker 3>find how I.

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<v Speaker 1>Don't know if you guys partner with Catholic charities, but

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<v Speaker 1>I've seen their facility that they have for young you know,

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<v Speaker 1>moms and kids, and they stay for years there until

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<v Speaker 1>they can really get their feet under them, and it's

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<v Speaker 1>just such an impressive operation. And all of this stuff

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<v Speaker 1>kind of flies under the radar. And I think part

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<v Speaker 1>of it is because unfortunately this is so contentious, right,

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<v Speaker 1>it shouldn't be. This should be a no brainer, like

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<v Speaker 1>why shouldn't we want women to have baby? I just

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<v Speaker 1>I don't understand why. It's it's such a hateful conversation sometimes,

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<v Speaker 1>But I got a couple of ways. I don't want

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<v Speaker 1>to get too long without talking about the gala and

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<v Speaker 1>the golf tournament and everything else. You guys are bringing

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<v Speaker 1>in a well known pro life advocate who has been

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<v Speaker 1>very open with his mom about the fact that he

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<v Speaker 1>was counseled. His mom was counseled to have an abortion

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<v Speaker 1>and she just said no. And that guy is Tim Tebow. Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>tell me about him coming into town.

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<v Speaker 3>He is going to be here September fourteenth for a

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<v Speaker 3>gala out at the Gaylord Rockies Convention Center, and we

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<v Speaker 3>are going to have a live auction. You can even

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<v Speaker 3>buy table sponsorships to get into a VIP meet and

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<v Speaker 3>greet with Tim Tebow. And we had someone contact our

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<v Speaker 3>development director and said, what do I have to do

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<v Speaker 3>to meet Tim?

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<v Speaker 2>He said, well, do I have a package for you?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, So he will be there on Sunday night for

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<v Speaker 3>that event, and then the next day we are hosting

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<v Speaker 3>a golf tournament and he is going to be at

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<v Speaker 3>Cherry Creek Country Club. They have partnered with us and

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<v Speaker 3>that's fantastic playing golf. We only have three foursomes still

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<v Speaker 3>available for that. So the golf tournament is almost sold out,

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<v Speaker 3>but we still have tables for the galab.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, I have all of this information on the blog today.

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<v Speaker 1>The gala is Sunday, September fourteenth, so it's in a couple

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<v Speaker 1>of weeks at six pm at the Gaylord Hotel.

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<v Speaker 2>How much your tickets for that?

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<v Speaker 3>A table is twenty and twenty two hundred and fifty dollars,

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<v Speaker 3>an individual seat is two hundred and twenty five.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, so that is for that, and you got four

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<v Speaker 1>I'm pulling up the fundraising on the website really quick,

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<v Speaker 1>and you only have four foursomes for the golf Is

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<v Speaker 1>it three seventy five or person?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes? Okay, I'm looking right now. Just makes sure so

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<v Speaker 2>you probably won't go ahead and do that now.

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<v Speaker 3>Yes, if you want to play the golf tournament, Like

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<v Speaker 3>I said, Tim's going to be walking around, He's going

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<v Speaker 3>to spend the entire day with us. Get on there today.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's get it sold out.

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<v Speaker 1>I have a couple of people that are texting in

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<v Speaker 1>right now. By the way, if you love what you're

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<v Speaker 1>hearing and you want to support this, you can say,

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<v Speaker 1>set up a five dollars a month donation. You can

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<v Speaker 1>set up a ten dollar a month donation. You can

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<v Speaker 1>set up a one time donation for five million dollars.

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<v Speaker 1>You do whatever you.

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<v Speaker 2>Want to do.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, I just feel really good about making that

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<v Speaker 1>last offer.

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<v Speaker 2>In case Steve, I don't think like that. I just

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<v Speaker 2>want to plant that seed.

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<v Speaker 1>So whatever you can do, you can participate, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>and you could do this, or you could just give

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<v Speaker 1>a little money. Here's a couple of stories I want

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<v Speaker 1>to share though. I think it's fascinating. Mandy twenty six

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<v Speaker 1>years ago, my wife and I were forty years old,

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<v Speaker 1>found out we were pregnant unplanned. We had an abortion

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<v Speaker 1>appointment set up in the twelfth hour. I changed my

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<v Speaker 1>mind and it took a lot of prayers and counsel

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<v Speaker 1>with my wife to talk or into having the baby.

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<v Speaker 1>Put a real strain between us. We had three children

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<v Speaker 1>already went through with the pregnancy, and we have a

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<v Speaker 1>beautiful adult woman now. I had to step up to

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<v Speaker 1>the plate and do most of the parenting on the

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<v Speaker 1>fourth child. Our marriage didn't survive, but I'm glad we

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<v Speaker 1>didn't abort this one. As an adoptee born during the

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<v Speaker 1>early days of Roe versus Wade. Thank you for bringing

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<v Speaker 1>on a guest who shows actual voices and not a

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<v Speaker 1>single agenda. So yes, as a guy, this guy says,

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<v Speaker 1>I love this group, but it's hard to have a

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<v Speaker 1>position on abortion. It's really not you, guys, it's really

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<v Speaker 1>not one of my I think one of the most

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<v Speaker 1>unfair things in the world are that women have to

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<v Speaker 1>do the brunt of growing.

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<v Speaker 2>That baby, because it's really hard.

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<v Speaker 1>But it's also unfair because men don't get the really

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<v Speaker 1>cool stuff about having a baby, little feet kicking from

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<v Speaker 1>the inside. Dude, there's literally nothing in the world like it.

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<v Speaker 1>It's amazing. But men should also get a say.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, and I can speak to in my previous clinic,

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<v Speaker 3>there was one summer we had three young men different

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<v Speaker 3>pregnancy tests. All three of them were literally wailing in

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<v Speaker 3>our waiting room because she was determined to get an

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<v Speaker 3>abortion and he had no rights. He offered to support,

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<v Speaker 3>he offered to provide a place to live, he offered

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<v Speaker 3>for his parents to do it. In all three incidences,

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<v Speaker 3>and a man has literally no say.

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<v Speaker 2>That's just really, really sad it is.

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<v Speaker 1>Alternatives Pregnancy Center is the place you want to put

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<v Speaker 1>a link to all of this on the blog today.

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<v Speaker 1>I so appreciate you, Ashley Graves and everyone involved with this,

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<v Speaker 1>because it's really irritating to me when I hear people,

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<v Speaker 1>and I hear this from friends of mine who are

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<v Speaker 1>so staunchly pro choice to the moment of birth that

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<v Speaker 1>they don't even want to hear that there are actual

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<v Speaker 1>organizations who help and support women, not just in making

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<v Speaker 1>that decision, but also throughout the pregnancy, after the baby

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<v Speaker 1>is born, and helping people get a start on life.

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<v Speaker 1>They exist, but they only exist because we support them.

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<v Speaker 1>So yes, thank you so much for coming in today.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you. You guys are going to.

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<v Speaker 1>Have an amazing event. Emma tell Tim, I said, Hi,

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<v Speaker 1>I will