Speaker 1: Everyone, Welcome to fuck.
Speaker 2: You want you want me to do you want me
Speaker 2: to do it? Or you got it a bit.
Speaker 1: By the way, it's not a bit.
Speaker 3: Not if you can.
Speaker 4: See my mucus if you want, oh god, sell it
Speaker 4: on eBay right nobody would buy that. Welcome to episode
Speaker 4: the Big one zero of ten Space. Yeah, Space Pirates
Speaker 4: with Me, Schwabty and Conquests are currently on tour. By
Speaker 4: the time this episode comes out, I think the tour
Speaker 4: will have finished. But if you want a reason why
Speaker 4: I currently sound like this, it's because we're on tour
Speaker 4: and we all got really sick. So Me, Swaboti and
Speaker 4: Conquests are all actively dying right now. Yeah yeah, So
Speaker 4: we're going to see how all the character voices work
Speaker 4: where we sound like this, But there are two people
Speaker 4: here who are not sick, and I am here with
Speaker 4: Rick Plan, Josh dreyfe Hayes.
Speaker 5: Ladies and gentlemen, Hello there, I'm Rick Plan, Union of Man,
Speaker 5: a disgraced fighter pilot captain who is fighting his way
Speaker 5: through this world of food with our band of near dwells,
Speaker 5: who I believe we're calling the Pack in honor of Sigma,
Speaker 5: effectively being the one who is making all of the
Speaker 5: correct decisions. I'm very much looking forward to defeating the
Speaker 5: warlords of food and getting the hell off this planet.
Speaker 4: Oh wow, okay, now you guys have to do introductions
Speaker 4: like that.
Speaker 1: Oh fuck it.
Speaker 3: I'm here with taking what a one Crag.
Speaker 1: I'm names Crag.
Speaker 2: I am a rock alien from the planet Obscarren, but
Speaker 2: I'm actually a secret agent that's here to save the
Speaker 2: pagerous virus. That's basically my whole character. I was going
Speaker 2: to reveal that in episode forty seven, but like, I'm
Speaker 2: just soilling it now.
Speaker 3: Sorry, Craig. Yeah, you said save the world? Which world? Dostova?
Speaker 2: Uh No, that one over there, it's classified. It's classified
Speaker 2: the world that I have to save.
Speaker 4: Okay, so there is a word that you have to say, yes, okay, yes,
Speaker 4: I will say here with Sigma Suavity.
Speaker 6: That my name is Sigma.
Speaker 1: You fuck.
Speaker 6: The part of my voice that I used to do
Speaker 6: Sigma is almost entirely the pot that's missing. Yeah, this
Speaker 6: one is Sma Razor Claw. I am a lichen from
Speaker 6: Epsilon benrith Epsilon. I You know, I don't know how
Speaker 6: much backstory you need, but I'm looking to get back
Speaker 6: home and make things right with my pack.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I can imagine.
Speaker 4: Actually Crumb is satting there with his with like a
Speaker 4: book and he's like, okay, that's great, I've got.
Speaker 1: That down, keeping track.
Speaker 4: And then Nevena, I'm here. We caught a quest of
Speaker 4: na Thank you Crumb.
Speaker 7: My name is Nevena. I am a Felinari from St. Marinus,
Speaker 7: and I am currently in a will they want they
Speaker 7: with mister Crumb.
Speaker 3: Wait wait what does that mean?
Speaker 1: Wait?
Speaker 3: Wait, what's going on? I don't know what?
Speaker 1: What do not break the fourth wall? Crumb?
Speaker 4: I was, I was, I was giving an in law
Speaker 4: universe to why we'll do it?
Speaker 1: These introductions well like camera confessional.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, we're starting the episode wherever we were, and
Speaker 2: we just all turned to the camera.
Speaker 1: That's just there now. I just you're probably wondering how
Speaker 1: I got here.
Speaker 2: This is Nevena's story. She's the narrator for this whole,
Speaker 2: this whole thing. Yeah, hey, guys, my day's pocket.
Speaker 1: Oh no, you can't.
Speaker 5: Go to die.
Speaker 3: I will I will throw up. Okay.
Speaker 4: What happened last time was Crag walked into the slaughter
Speaker 4: forests and he's fighting an animal monstrosity, a mixture of
Speaker 4: different animals to hyper accelerate the tastiest.
Speaker 2: I completely forgot about this, and I had a plan.
Speaker 1: And I don't remember what it was.
Speaker 3: Everybody else is really far away. I assume there is
Speaker 3: a strong assumption that you guys will follow after Crag.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm assuming we're He's going to have a decent
Speaker 6: headstart on us.
Speaker 1: But as soon as he starts.
Speaker 6: Running, yes, Sigma certainly is going to be following right right,
Speaker 6: He's not going to be so far behind.
Speaker 2: You know, I didn't take any notes. These are all
Speaker 2: for the one piece live action series.
Speaker 1: I don't have any notes.
Speaker 4: So because it would I'm going to say it would
Speaker 4: take everyone about a round before they can get there.
Speaker 4: We're going to have a round of and we are
Speaker 4: rolling initiative. Have a round of Crag versus Crag time.
Speaker 1: All right, was it good? Is it a good? Number?
Speaker 1: That is not a good? That is actually that might zero?
Speaker 1: A number? I don't even.
Speaker 5: Before combat starts. Am I able to use once initiative
Speaker 5: has been rolled? My alert feet?
Speaker 3: What does it do? In this context?
Speaker 5: It allows me to, with one willing member of my team,
Speaker 5: swap the initiative order with me and then.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I mean you totally can do that.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I would like to show you Crag don't die
Speaker 5: on our way and with Crags.
Speaker 3: Is going to get the eighteen.
Speaker 1: Wow. Oh shit.
Speaker 4: That means I've got to include this bit in the edit.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah great, I'm sure I'll make that
Speaker 4: sound great. Sure, Crag, you were in the meat forests.
Speaker 3: You see meat.
Speaker 4: Trees around you. The animal monstrosity you have tussled with it.
Speaker 4: Briefly out of the shadows came Brenda Brisket evily laughed.
Speaker 3: Pointing up a weapon towards you.
Speaker 4: She barks some sort of command, and the animal monstrosity
Speaker 4: is going to strike at you again.
Speaker 1: All right, here we go.
Speaker 4: This time it is not charging, so I'm just gonna
Speaker 4: it's going to lift up a giant what looks like
Speaker 4: an elephant's foot and slam it down on.
Speaker 3: Top of you.
Speaker 1: He critically hits you.
Speaker 3: That's it ten damage, cashing parts of your like body off.
Speaker 3: He snarls at you in an incomprehensible noise of a
Speaker 3: mixture of lots of different animals, which sort of kind
Speaker 3: of sounds like.
Speaker 1: That's not bad, that's pretty yeah, like an agamation.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Scooby Doo amalgamation. All right, all right, just
Speaker 2: stepped on by this thing, all right? Ah, this reminds
Speaker 2: me of when I would tussle with the Magma manfs
Speaker 2: back on my homeland. Calm yourself, one, I'm going to
Speaker 2: attempt an animal handling role here. Oh God, so I
Speaker 2: have so with with with my rune night. I have
Speaker 2: two runes. One was the fire rune. The other one
Speaker 2: is the frost run. It's on the fridge. I have
Speaker 2: advantage on animal handling checks specifically on this.
Speaker 4: Right, but you would have disadvantage because you're fighting it actively.
Speaker 3: So right, Okay.
Speaker 2: I am going to try to calm this animal and
Speaker 2: see if it will allow me to ride on top
Speaker 2: of it.
Speaker 1: As my.
Speaker 3: That's a that's a step start.
Speaker 1: We'll start with.
Speaker 3: We'll start with starting before you start to domesticate it. Okay.
Speaker 3: It's gonna be a good role. Has to be a
Speaker 3: really good role, and a five is not.
Speaker 1: A good role. Crag.
Speaker 2: Wait wait now I can't do I could do it,
Speaker 2: but it's not gonna to animal had leg?
Speaker 1: What did you think? What's gonna happened? I was gonna
Speaker 1: get an eighteen and so I was gonna get a
Speaker 1: crit you're gonna let me do it.
Speaker 3: You put your rockie head forwards. You have never taped
Speaker 3: an animal. Yeah, the animal doesn't even fucking understand anything.
Speaker 3: He roars, he splatters beat in to your face.
Speaker 2: That doesn't hurt me, right, Yeah, that's that's my turn. Yeah,
Speaker 2: that's my action. Yeah, that's my action. Let's see. Uh,
Speaker 2: any movement would probably trigger an opportunity attack. So you're
Speaker 2: just gonna move in front of it. I'm gonna stand
Speaker 2: right in front.
Speaker 1: Of the thing.
Speaker 3: Anything right, great? Great?
Speaker 1: Great?
Speaker 5: Ye?
Speaker 4: So yeah, okay, all right, people are spending running towards
Speaker 4: in the meantime crag.
Speaker 3: You could see in the distance bread and a brisket.
Speaker 8: Go who wandered into the wrong forest? Why does she
Speaker 8: sound like an old lady? She's like twenty. Well it's
Speaker 8: been rough, you know. She smokes a lot of cigarettes.
Speaker 1: It's all the grill smoke.
Speaker 8: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: She pulls out a weapon, a gun, and she squeezes
Speaker 4: the trigger and you see like meat slowly kind of
Speaker 4: slop out of it and crawl out of it.
Speaker 3: Comes a meat man and he onto the ground.
Speaker 1: He just scorts okay, yeah.
Speaker 4: And he stands up and he and he just sort
Speaker 4: of looks around and he goes meat and that is
Speaker 4: his turn.
Speaker 3: There is a second animal monstrosity that is going to charge.
Speaker 1: There's a second one.
Speaker 2: Okay, try to domesticate this one.
Speaker 4: He's going to charge towards you. But he's using all
Speaker 4: his movement to do so, right, Nevena. Finally you reach
Speaker 4: the slaughter forests, you run up crags right in front
Speaker 4: of you.
Speaker 3: He's got two animal monster in front of him.
Speaker 2: What do you know, Vena, I'm trying to calm it down.
Speaker 2: I think it's working. I don't think it is. It's
Speaker 2: just like it seems quite agitated. I know I'm drewing
Speaker 2: my best here. Are you good at handling animals?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 3: You, Divina. You're also going to notice Brenda Brisket in
Speaker 3: the distance here, and you.
Speaker 1: Know it's Brenda Brisket in the distance? How far away
Speaker 1: is she? She?
Speaker 4: I would say, is about seventy to eighty feet away.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go twenty feet here.
Speaker 4: You're gonna You're gonna try and run around the animal monstrosities.
Speaker 4: So crag with two giant montrosities in front of him,
Speaker 4: and you fucking duck to the side.
Speaker 1: You're like don't worry.
Speaker 4: You know what I'm doing, moving forwards towards the meatman. Okay,
Speaker 4: after dodge it, after dodging slyly to the right of
Speaker 4: cragging these wild beasts. I'm dashing as a bonus action, okay,
Speaker 4: because I can do that. Yeah, so you're you're moving
Speaker 4: to like eighty feet. Okay, so you're up to a
Speaker 4: meat man. But you meat man is now in front
Speaker 4: of you.
Speaker 3: Oh he no meat me me.
Speaker 1: Oh your pokemon. I'm gonna I'm gonna say to Brenda,
Speaker 1: is this yours? Oh?
Speaker 4: Yes, this is one of my little meat men. Would
Speaker 4: you like me to make another for you? For I
Speaker 4: can make a plenty meet men. I make them every day.
Speaker 4: And when do you step into my forest? Well, I'm
Speaker 4: about to make you pay because my meat men are
Speaker 4: made of meat and I make them very big.
Speaker 1: Keep going, sorry, I thought you could were going to
Speaker 1: keep rhyming.
Speaker 4: Oh oh yeah, right right, because my intellect is like
Speaker 4: a tree.
Speaker 3: Your intellect is like a twig.
Speaker 7: Very good, Well, no need to make You'll need to
Speaker 7: make more meat men after.
Speaker 4: This, and I'm gonna florry of blows. I'm all on
Speaker 4: the meat man, all the meat man.
Speaker 3: Oh brother, you can Josh's table.
Speaker 1: I'm just hoping it's all going. Well. I'm so sorry.
Speaker 4: So you can't flurry a blows condor because that uses
Speaker 4: your bonus action. You could just make attacks, in which
Speaker 4: case I'm going to use one of those. One of
Speaker 4: those strikes is going to have a hand of harm.
Speaker 3: Oh on the meat.
Speaker 1: On the meat man. That's just seventeen.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think you only have one attack, Connor right,
Speaker 4: because you would You're off hand attacks a bonus action
Speaker 4: as well, So so you just have one attack as
Speaker 4: your action. Seventeen does harm on it. It has a
Speaker 4: hand of harm. What does that mean? Describe it to be?
Speaker 4: It is damage equal to one roll of my martial
Speaker 4: arts dice plus my wisdom modifier.
Speaker 3: Wow, okay, that's just double the damage.
Speaker 1: Hell yeah, harm him?
Speaker 3: Harm him?
Speaker 4: How six and then your wisdom's So it's a D
Speaker 4: six plus one D six plus one.
Speaker 3: How How is this hand of home? How does it
Speaker 3: look different? It looks different.
Speaker 4: I create a much bigger hand mm hmm.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: So I'm getting I've made a big slap and I'm
Speaker 4: just slapping this meat across.
Speaker 1: Here comes the giant face.
Speaker 4: Giant hand slaps this fucking meat and he explodes fucking
Speaker 4: everywhere he's he's smatted across the slaughter forests. There's meat
Speaker 4: chunks all over the place. And Brenda looks at you
Speaker 4: quite disgusted. Well, that was that was rude.
Speaker 7: Man, You know right, he needed a hand a color.
Speaker 1: What is giving you hand of harm?
Speaker 3: Are you not the Yeah?
Speaker 1: What's some class? Subclass reveal?
Speaker 3: Is this subclass reveal?
Speaker 9: Right?
Speaker 1: Now? You used to subclass? My subclass reveal? Is whatever
Speaker 1: the subclass was that I chose?
Speaker 3: Wait?
Speaker 1: Do you not remember? Is the name of it? No?
Speaker 1: I think he revealed it's Warrior of Mercy. There feeling
Speaker 1: an impluence of mercy.
Speaker 4: Holy ship. Yeah, way of mercy. That makes sense anyway.
Speaker 4: The meat men dies. Okay, all right, Craig. Unfortunately, this
Speaker 4: animal strosty is going to attack you.
Speaker 2: No, that's not unfortunate. I'm trying to tame it. You know,
Speaker 2: we have there's like some there's a process.
Speaker 3: So he stomps down on you for a sixteen. But
Speaker 3: since your armor class is fifteen, again.
Speaker 2: That means number bigger than other number and somehow damage
Speaker 2: that damage that the crit I'm still up can.
Speaker 3: On your turn, you will be able to because you
Speaker 3: will be.
Speaker 1: Down to take a reaction to be able to see it.
Speaker 3: Okay, what what?
Speaker 4: No, you're not there yetunately, I've so sorry, but you
Speaker 4: will be able to study your turn. This is the
Speaker 4: this is the this is what Crag has had to
Speaker 4: deal with for rushing in a loan.
Speaker 1: Yep, consequences, Go ahead, turn again.
Speaker 2: Okay, well I couldn't calm it, so we're gonna do
Speaker 2: another type of animal handling. I'm gonna use giants mighte
Speaker 2: and I'm gonna grow huge.
Speaker 1: That gives me advantage. That's a bonus action to do that,
Speaker 1: and that.
Speaker 2: Gives me advantage on strength checks and strength saving throws.
Speaker 4: Right, come this large, you'll you'll you kind of a mess.
Speaker 4: I guess you're now putting meat onto your body from
Speaker 4: the surrounding area.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess whatever whatever is in the surrounding area
Speaker 2: just amalgamates into me. We can make that canon.
Speaker 3: That's that's what we said before. Anyway.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, cool, let's do it all right, Let's see,
Speaker 2: I really don't want to kill it.
Speaker 1: I'll smack it with my fridge.
Speaker 2: Damn it, you miss I am Crags rolls are.
Speaker 4: This giant might you bring out the fridge, and even
Speaker 4: with disadvantage, you get seven and seven. You slam it
Speaker 4: down on top of the animal monstrosity, but two weird
Speaker 4: hands come out of the animal monstrosity and grab it
Speaker 4: in like a weird, freaky way, and then one of
Speaker 4: them gives you the middle figure.
Speaker 2: I'll tell you what, whenever I go into Giants MTE,
Speaker 2: it's always like a week.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3: Pocket is now going to appear beside you and.
Speaker 4: Goes, oh what the fuck? Oh shit, right, well, I
Speaker 4: guess it's time to bust this out. And he's gonna
Speaker 4: because he's got two missing hands. One of them, he's
Speaker 4: gonna plug a knife in, press a button and it's
Speaker 4: gonna get really hot.
Speaker 3: Oh one thousand degree knife, I remember that, I remember
Speaker 3: that craze.
Speaker 4: Yeah, And he's gonna run up to the meat monstrosity
Speaker 4: that was attacking you, and he's going to try and
Speaker 4: jam his knife into the thing and he does hit.
Speaker 3: He does fifteen damage, cooking into the flesh of the creature.
Speaker 3: That's pretty good, Sigma. It is now your turn. You
Speaker 3: now just arrived and you're next to crag. You've just
Speaker 3: seen Sigma. Sorry, Pocket fucking.
Speaker 6: Alright, alright, yeah, I guess arriving into this forest, I'll
Speaker 6: see the monstrosities in front of Crag and I'll use
Speaker 6: a bonus action as I arrived to try and hide.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they don't see me as my approach. Let me
Speaker 1: make a stealth check.
Speaker 4: Well, ye, you're hiding behind one of the meat trees,
Speaker 4: probably because Craig is that big.
Speaker 1: I'll just hide behind him. Yeah, as good as a
Speaker 1: shield if nothing else.
Speaker 3: So you sort of sneak up behind crag.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm gonna there's like steam covering like mists, but
Speaker 4: it's obviously like cooking steam.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I like cover, like actual cover behind me.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Well, someone trying to make a range attack against me, yeah, leg.
Speaker 3: Just hit your leg instead.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I have the cover, and I'll lean out and
Speaker 6: try and shoot my blast pistol.
Speaker 4: Against the injured monstrosity that pocket the injured yeah yeah, yeah, Okay,
Speaker 4: so you're blasted.
Speaker 1: Seven Oh my god, six seven. You got whted and
Speaker 1: got six seven?
Speaker 3: What's happening?
Speaker 1: What is happening?
Speaker 3: I know your sex was fine.
Speaker 2: Like setting on the setting on roll twenty, that just
Speaker 2: dog ship dice setting.
Speaker 1: For this one.
Speaker 4: Man, I hit my role just fine, you got yeah,
Speaker 4: and now you're revealed and the second animal monstrosity, well
Speaker 4: I'm still yeah, I'm revealed, but I'm still behind Craig.
Speaker 1: So I'm sure I'm fine.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't think I have anything else else I can
Speaker 1: do here.
Speaker 3: This is where Sea Herro is gonna pop up and go, oh,
Speaker 3: you guys need a hand. Yes, I think that would
Speaker 3: be appreciated, understandable. Crag was it? Yes, I can make
Speaker 3: you something tasty to heal you up.
Speaker 2: That would be great. I'm a little I'm a little
Speaker 2: bit weak right now.
Speaker 4: She flicks her wrist in this sort of magical cook
Speaker 4: where it comes out. It's such shimmering blue, and she
Speaker 4: starts chopping up fruits and vegetables and tofu, and she
Speaker 4: cooks it into this big pot and she pours it
Speaker 4: into a container and then.
Speaker 3: She splashes it on crack. Yeah, and that is.
Speaker 4: Actually gonna heal you.
Speaker 1: Sierra Vena, Sierra right, Yeah.
Speaker 3: You can cool the giant chef. Just say thank you.
Speaker 2: Chef, thank you, magical grand chef Lady. Of course, this
Speaker 2: will give me the energy I need to properly tame
Speaker 2: this mighty beast.
Speaker 1: Did I even eat any of that or was it
Speaker 1: just splashed on him.
Speaker 3: It seeped into him? HP from that?
Speaker 4: All right, Vena in front of you, Brenda Brisket pulls
Speaker 4: out her gun. I would have say, the reason why
Speaker 4: Rick Plant it's taking so long to get to his
Speaker 4: turn is because he swapped initiative.
Speaker 1: Zero. This is how long it would take me to
Speaker 1: get there.
Speaker 5: I thought it was important that Craig, who was in
Speaker 5: the forest, was able to do something while I'm outside
Speaker 5: just leisurely strolling in and all I've heard so far
Speaker 5: is a really loud slap and then some meat kind
Speaker 5: of sprayed out of the forest.
Speaker 2: I tried, and I failed, But thanks for the opportunity.
Speaker 1: I think it was a great idea.
Speaker 6: It just didn't account for the fact that Cragton could
Speaker 6: never hit anything out.
Speaker 1: Of Absolutely, I'm just talking. He is not good at
Speaker 1: being a riz night. He's actually kind of a failure.
Speaker 3: Yeah, how sorry, what is a riz night? Because you
Speaker 3: said that before?
Speaker 1: What is that's?
Speaker 2: No, no, no, that's rude night in scar And it's
Speaker 2: just like that's the name we gave it. That's the
Speaker 2: riz is an ashcar and word. It doesn't mean what
Speaker 2: you think it means.
Speaker 3: Okay, it's a coincidence. Yes, it's how are you spelling it?
Speaker 3: How are you spelling it?
Speaker 2: Oh, it's spelled the same way.
Speaker 1: It's a difference. Okay, you know.
Speaker 3: In front of you goes, Yes, you try and disrupt
Speaker 3: my master plaid. But don't you know that I make
Speaker 3: meat man.
Speaker 1: Rhyme.
Speaker 3: You're here today to spoil the fun. But I have
Speaker 3: not one, but two meat guns.
Speaker 4: And he she presses the trigger, and out of them
Speaker 4: the meat man slowly sort of crawl all out being
Speaker 4: they're like being born and they and they both splot
Speaker 4: onto the ground. Two meat men guns. When fire, a
Speaker 4: meat man is born.
Speaker 1: I love how that's actually written on the meat.
Speaker 4: Well, it's what it doesn't it. And so there are
Speaker 4: now two meat men in front of you. And I
Speaker 4: realized I got a role initiative for the meat men.
Speaker 4: The last one wasn't alive for long enough to have
Speaker 4: an initiative role. This will be the general meatman initiative role.
Speaker 3: Ten. So if they survive, you better watch out, which
Speaker 3: they won't. They won't.
Speaker 4: Stigma animal monstrosity is rotating round towards you, towards me,
Speaker 4: towards you.
Speaker 3: It's love, that's your smell.
Speaker 4: Oh you see it has this lovely long nose that's
Speaker 4: sort of it's, you know, like a snake, but at
Speaker 4: the end is a nose off its body and.
Speaker 3: It comes around crack.
Speaker 1: Does force have a turn?
Speaker 3: And as you say that, Sigma.
Speaker 4: Just slightly slower than you, ironically because you were still determined,
Speaker 4: Force comes through the forest behind you, hovering there and
Speaker 4: goes my leash. What do you need me to do?
Speaker 4: I see there are enemies in front of us. Would
Speaker 4: you like me to engage combat mode? I think, where
Speaker 4: do you do? You have a combat mode?
Speaker 3: But I don't know. I can see.
Speaker 1: I was going to tell you to try and get
Speaker 1: me out of here, but.
Speaker 3: Oh, do you want to fight? Well, let's let's take
Speaker 3: a look.
Speaker 1: Fucking gatlings.
Speaker 3: Just well, I've done a self let me do a
Speaker 3: self analysis, real quick.
Speaker 4: Analysis loading. Wait time ten minutes. You have canceled the analysis.
Speaker 6: Oh this just like this trunk is like sniffing around craigs.
Speaker 6: I'm like, yeah, perhaps you could just let me get
Speaker 6: on your back and we we get out of the
Speaker 6: range of the enemies.
Speaker 3: Of course.
Speaker 4: Wait, oh, sorry, I have an update. Hey sorry, Before
Speaker 4: you could do that, you've got to have to restart me.
Speaker 1: How do I do that?
Speaker 3: I don't you you're the one who built me.
Speaker 1: I just upgraded you. Well, I did not build you.
Speaker 4: Well, I apparently I have a software update I need to.
Speaker 3: Well you can.
Speaker 4: I can remind you of it later, Okay.
Speaker 3: I remind you later.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 4: Sorry, First, you have to prove you're not a robot.
Speaker 4: Like there's a bunch of letters that are slightly wonky.
Speaker 4: What are these letters?
Speaker 1: Who designed this?
Speaker 3: Os?
Speaker 1: Is this even a language I speak?
Speaker 3: It's all in German?
Speaker 4: No, No, I'm space German whatever that means space German.
Speaker 3: Okay, mm hmm. Right around the capture, Yeah, yeah, you do.
Speaker 4: You do the capture, okay, and I guess yeah, you
Speaker 4: can get on that on the back of him. Okay,
Speaker 4: But but it's still the animal mostrosities turn and his
Speaker 4: nose sniffs you out, and you hear a deep rumbling
Speaker 4: from his being, and he cruels towards you and opens
Speaker 4: its jaws wide.
Speaker 3: But not that wide.
Speaker 2: Father, It's not going to swallow your entire body, any
Speaker 2: part of it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, just being bitter. You're not being swallowed. I
Speaker 4: want to stress, holy ship. Just a bite, just a bite.
Speaker 3: And he slams down with his teeth.
Speaker 4: Yeah, fifteen hits, all right, seven damage as he chumps
Speaker 4: your liking body.
Speaker 1: I was really enjoying not taking any damages coming.
Speaker 3: No Rick plan. You finally arrive.
Speaker 1: I'd like to walk into the forest and be like, right, oh.
Speaker 3: I like the reason why you will last is because
Speaker 3: you walked whilst.
Speaker 1: Everyone else ran walk into right.
Speaker 5: God, I see a classic monstrosity mead Man battle. Haven't
Speaker 5: had one of theirs in a while. Looking forward to it,
Speaker 5: right Sigma, fill me in. Who's the bad guy the
Speaker 5: meat months? Oh yeah, and there's Brenda Briskets over there.
Speaker 5: You right, okay, you gun put it down. I'd like
Speaker 5: to cast heat metal targeting one of the guns she's holding.
Speaker 4: That's all right, okay, Well, firstly, you're going to have
Speaker 4: to move a little bit closer to her because she's
Speaker 4: eighty five feet aways.
Speaker 3: Heat metal. The range of that spot anything I can
Speaker 3: see within.
Speaker 5: A range, anything within range, right within range, But it
Speaker 5: doesn't actually say what the range is on the heat
Speaker 5: metal spell.
Speaker 3: Zane, I got it.
Speaker 1: I go.
Speaker 2: Sixty feet of it at least range sixty feet Yeah.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, oh you've moved you Okay, You'll have.
Speaker 5: To walk into the forest so I'll be able to
Speaker 5: be close enough to see it.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, so you walk into you walk
Speaker 4: towards her a little bit further right walking around this
Speaker 4: month meets monstrosity and yes, you can heat metal.
Speaker 3: What does she have to do?
Speaker 5: She immediately takes two da fire damage when I cast
Speaker 5: a spell if she is holding it.
Speaker 3: Okay, well she is, so roll the two D eight damage.
Speaker 5: Okay, that's just.
Speaker 3: No.
Speaker 4: You just slash space two D eight. There you go,
Speaker 4: eight damage. She goes, ah, my hand.
Speaker 5: She now must succeed on a constitution saving throw or
Speaker 5: she will drop the object.
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, so she is going to do that. I
Speaker 4: don't think constitution is very good. It isn't.
Speaker 3: She drops the meat gun onto the floor. She does
Speaker 3: have two, but you take care of one of them.
Speaker 4: The meat gun slams onto the ground and you could
Speaker 4: see a half formed meat man sort of splooging out
Speaker 4: of it. It's like like a meatman fetus.
Speaker 1: I'll do that again in a moment.
Speaker 5: You might just need to cover me while we wait
Speaker 5: for that to kind of, you know, reach out. Apart
Speaker 5: from that, not much else I can do really, good
Speaker 5: luck everyone.
Speaker 4: At this point, now Crumb will run into the forest
Speaker 4: a sorry, guys, I'm here.
Speaker 1: I am.
Speaker 3: I have asthma. It's difficult for me to run.
Speaker 2: I totally understand, Crum, It's all right, don't push yourself.
Speaker 1: He's also he's so grumbling now because of the voice.
Speaker 3: And he looks up and he sees Brenda and he goes,
Speaker 3: I knew it was you, Brenda, Brenda, why are you
Speaker 3: fighting us? It's me Crumb from university, remember, And Brenda
Speaker 3: looks over and go, I don't even know who the
Speaker 3: fuck you are, and Crumb goes, oh, I was.
Speaker 10: You know, we sat next to each other and we
Speaker 10: both graduated early with honors and nope, it's not regular
Speaker 10: bow oh okay, right, and he he looks down quite solemnly.
Speaker 4: Well, I guess I won't feel bad when I do this,
Speaker 4: and he pulls out.
Speaker 3: His Crumb Crumb slang shot.
Speaker 4: So he's got he got a bunch of the algae
Speaker 4: from the whatever, and he's created a slimy sort of slingshot,
Speaker 4: you know, based off novena, and he puts in some
Speaker 4: fruit he picked from Sierra's trees into the slingshot and
Speaker 4: he aims it towards BRender Brisket, and he's gonna crumb
Speaker 4: crumb sling shot fire.
Speaker 3: The fruit sows through the air. Wow, And it does
Speaker 3: pretty much Max's damage.
Speaker 4: There square in Brenda Brisket's face, smashing her goggles, her glasses,
Speaker 4: bruising her across the face. She looks bloodied, and dare
Speaker 4: I say, close to death? My crumb looks over to
Speaker 4: the Vina you in the distance. You just see that happening,
Speaker 4: and she shouts over and goes, see it's like you,
Speaker 4: but smaller.
Speaker 1: Good shot crumb. Wow.
Speaker 3: Wow, do I could be useful like that? And Divina,
Speaker 3: it is now your turn.
Speaker 1: It is now me pocket now when you're doing the
Speaker 1: crumb voice, because he's tired.
Speaker 4: Incidentally, so you're gonna have to tell me a little
Speaker 4: bit of a movement thing here. If I'm here, if
Speaker 4: you're just in front of the meat man, can I then,
Speaker 4: without opportunity attack move slightly behind the meat men here? Yeah,
Speaker 4: you just can't disengage from the range of the meat men.
Speaker 4: You can but around the meat men to get to
Speaker 4: makes sense. Yeah, Yeah, So I'm gonna I'm gonna slickly
Speaker 4: dodge between these meat men as they lunge for me. Yeah,
Speaker 4: sort of like I do want to stay for the record.
Speaker 4: The meat men are like a foot tool. Oh they're
Speaker 4: gonna swiftly jump over the meatmen and just like hof
Speaker 4: over look Brenda Brisket dead in the eyes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and say, oh fuck, you are rude to my friend.
Speaker 1: What Vulinari punch?
Speaker 3: Homer class is fifteen you do not hit.
Speaker 4: Second Vlinari punch another fourteen fifteen you do not hit.
Speaker 1: That's the number again. That's not looking good. Wow, it's
Speaker 1: unlucky fourteen, guys, it is.
Speaker 4: It is unlucky fourteen. How is she dodging these attacks?
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's like meat.
Speaker 4: You try and she dodges to one side. You see
Speaker 4: her tools and gadgets on it. She's like taking stuff
Speaker 4: out of her backpack now and she's getting out a
Speaker 4: giant meat rifle to create Oh no, you can only imagine.
Speaker 1: Does it have a brisket scope? Oh?
Speaker 3: I assume that your turn Avenah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Unfortunately she was so she was so filled with
Speaker 4: rage that it clouded her mind. Yeah, you move like
Speaker 4: you move like jelly, you move like trifle. But soon
Speaker 4: you will not move when you get shot by my rifle. Yeah,
Speaker 4: terrified crag. You're gonna get audible mostrosity.
Speaker 1: Okay, I probably won't get hurt if I unlet's say krits.
Speaker 3: But probably Well, this one's gonna try.
Speaker 1: To bite you.
Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, yeah, seven damage. But it is now your
Speaker 4: turn crack.
Speaker 2: All right, you know what I'm just gonna I'm gonna
Speaker 2: hit this fucking thing, you know, like, okay, work so bad? Please, Okay,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna swing my great acts.
Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: A bunch of shit is gonna happen here. Okay, So
Speaker 2: first of all, I'm using the fire rune.
Speaker 3: So yeah, teching, teching, tecking, teching.
Speaker 4: Before the bunch of shit happens, can you just roll
Speaker 4: the damage with a great pick.
Speaker 3: Because he's on single digit HP, you kill him anyway.
Speaker 2: Oh that's great. I'm using cleave to hit the other one.
Speaker 3: Whoa, oh my god.
Speaker 2: Oh let me your creature of the melee attack. You
Speaker 2: can make another melee attack to roll a second creature.
Speaker 2: You can see within five feet. On a hit, your
Speaker 2: second target deals damage equal to the weapon without any
Speaker 2: additional ability model.
Speaker 4: Oh wow, so just be the damage of the wall pick,
Speaker 4: which is so I have to I think I still
Speaker 4: have to roll a hit, right, yeah, you rolle a
Speaker 4: hit six anyway, So you swing the wolf pick round?
Speaker 1: How are you?
Speaker 3: Are you trying to knock out this animals? Also to
Speaker 3: you kill it?
Speaker 2: Ah? Ah man, I do want to have this meat.
Speaker 2: I do want to tame the meat mammoth. Okay, I'll
Speaker 2: try to knock it out. I'll just knock it out.
Speaker 3: Wow.
Speaker 4: Okay, you bring up your warpacker, just smash it down
Speaker 4: onto the animal monstrosity, cleaving it round to try and
Speaker 4: hit the other one. It just barely grazes the other one.
Speaker 4: He doesn't even notice, too focused on wolf. But this
Speaker 4: animal is now collapses to the ground unconscious.
Speaker 1: You will be in my charge when you wake.
Speaker 4: Okay, it is now is now the horses turn? What
Speaker 4: do you want force?
Speaker 6: I wanted to get me out of here, get me
Speaker 6: out of the range of this monstrosity.
Speaker 4: Right, so it's going to be a disengage, I guess
Speaker 4: from the horse I've accidentally deleted him. It looks like
Speaker 4: that's okay, Yeah, he's gone. Anyway, just pretend he's with you.
Speaker 4: Do you want to go towards Brenda or okay? Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: so he's he's disengaging with you on his back, and
Speaker 4: he charges you towards Brenda. What galloping is a strong word.
Speaker 4: He's hovering very fast.
Speaker 1: Given his legs are moving.
Speaker 3: No, so it looks like galloping. No, they just stay still.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, he slides.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it does bob up us down to simulate sort
Speaker 4: of galloping, but the legs don't move.
Speaker 3: It sort of goes up and down and he goes down.
Speaker 6: Is the whole thing that I the reason that I
Speaker 6: originally tinkered with.
Speaker 3: Oh you didn't want to slide?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Sorry, however you think something works in Restiges world, It
Speaker 2: doesn't that way.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it feels so good to hover through these wat
Speaker 3: trees with you sick.
Speaker 4: But my lord, I apologize occasionally say your name because
Speaker 4: it's that you'll use the name in my bag base.
Speaker 1: I would prefer that you use my name.
Speaker 3: Oh I couldn't. That would be disrespectful to such a
Speaker 3: high honorable lord as yourself.
Speaker 2: You are.
Speaker 6: I don't think I meet any of the legal prerequisites
Speaker 6: to be called the lord you.
Speaker 3: Do to me.
Speaker 4: If I could weep, I would, but you didn't program
Speaker 4: me to.
Speaker 3: No, I did not know that feat you're away from
Speaker 3: me actually.
Speaker 1: But yes, you were originally able to, and I thought, but.
Speaker 3: I understand it, because what is a horse that weeps?
Speaker 3: A faulty one?
Speaker 4: Just yes, I have desired to do one thing, and
Speaker 4: that is to carry you into battle.
Speaker 3: And I shall do that. And you know us you'll
Speaker 3: need me to turn. I will do that gladly.
Speaker 6: I mean this when I when I say this, of course,
Speaker 6: you are the best sentient vehicle that I've ever.
Speaker 1: Written on this planet.
Speaker 4: Now I really do understand why you didn't program me
Speaker 4: to cry. Okay, Spud Russet's going to appear now next
Speaker 4: to you, Craig, and I don't really think he wants.
Speaker 1: You are the chosen one.
Speaker 2: You may be able to tame this beast, as I
Speaker 2: say to the giant like monster that's lording over us
Speaker 2: and like drooling everywhere the other one to try to
Speaker 2: attempt to use an animal handling to.
Speaker 1: Commos, Oh you can do it, Sun.
Speaker 3: I believe in you, and.
Speaker 4: I have to do to see my wife again. There
Speaker 4: he goes. He fucking fails. He gets same as me.
Speaker 1: We are the same.
Speaker 3: I really wish we would. Pocket's gonna run around.
Speaker 4: He's having a good tie with his one thousand degree knife.
Speaker 3: That's his pocket noise.
Speaker 1: Yeah, pocket rolls great.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I know. He does nine damage, which is
Speaker 3: less good.
Speaker 4: But Sierra now is gonna get into position and she's
Speaker 4: going to create a bunch of carrots in the air,
Speaker 4: like magical carrots, and she's going to fire them forwards
Speaker 4: like a guiding vegetable, a vegetable bolt.
Speaker 2: That's all right, yeah yeah.
Speaker 3: And will they hit on the wrong thing? Seventeen does
Speaker 3: hit the monstrosity twenty six damage. She is a wall,
Speaker 3: She's a war on guys.
Speaker 4: She carrot penetrate the animal monstrosity, and now the animal
Speaker 4: monstrosity is on I would say, like a slither of health,
Speaker 4: the tiniest amount.
Speaker 3: Of health, like barely holding on.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Sigma, I mean Siarah, did she did just roll crazy?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 6: That's almost max dam Yeah Sigma, you're on the back
Speaker 6: of your horse.
Speaker 8: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Towards Brenda Brusk.
Speaker 6: I see that she's pulled out this rifle, which is
Speaker 6: sort of my main concern because I'm scared of what
Speaker 6: she's going to do with it.
Speaker 1: So I don't want to see what she's going to
Speaker 1: do with it.
Speaker 6: I'm going to attempt from horseback to to fire at her.
Speaker 3: Well, actually question, what is your question? You will get
Speaker 3: snick attacked.
Speaker 6: I know obviously Force moved me this far on his turn. Yeah,
Speaker 6: I assume that I can't. I can use my own movement, but.
Speaker 5: I can't like have him get no, no no no.
Speaker 6: Then I wonder from here because I can only attack
Speaker 6: once with my blaster, but if I use my clause.
Speaker 1: I can attack twice.
Speaker 3: Oh very yeah, so I'm going I.
Speaker 1: Want to do that.
Speaker 6: So I'm going to like leap off the face, close,
Speaker 6: close the rest of the distance, like the twenty feet
Speaker 6: or whatever.
Speaker 3: Yeah, myself towards Brenda.
Speaker 1: I'm going to make a claw attack with my with
Speaker 1: my liking clause. I critically fail.
Speaker 3: She turns around to you and says, oh.
Speaker 4: For a second, I was very frightened, But it seems
Speaker 4: you attacked like a sickly lichen.
Speaker 1: Man. You can't kill her, can you?
Speaker 3: Nobody can hit her.
Speaker 1: She doesn't even have that, Like.
Speaker 5: I've done damage by making a drop her gun.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna I'm gonna.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm gonna use my claw maastery to attempt to
Speaker 6: make another attack.
Speaker 3: Go ahead, I swear to God.
Speaker 4: If it's going ahead, it's your hof hand claw right,
Speaker 4: So it doesn't have the.
Speaker 1: It's my offend class.
Speaker 3: It doesn't have the modifier on the damage. But that's
Speaker 3: fine damage, That is fine. She only had two HP remaining.
Speaker 3: So are you killing her or you're knocking her out?
Speaker 8: Yes?
Speaker 3: You're killing her? Okay, death tell me how?
Speaker 1: She start running her mouth so she's gloating.
Speaker 6: My other hand comes up and just quickly across her throat.
Speaker 1: Oh god, a lot of gurgling. I'm gonna, I'm the
Speaker 1: take Novena by the shoulder and just turned her around. Yeah,
Speaker 1: don't look, Nvina.
Speaker 5: I'd like to walk up to the girdling girl and
Speaker 5: grab the rifle from her and there like, are we still?
Speaker 5: Are we still the rifle?
Speaker 1: Does? Yea?
Speaker 3: The animal trust still up? So the two meat men.
Speaker 11: Did they disappear? Are we still in combat? Yeah, we're
Speaker 11: still in comba. But bread of Brisket, she was a
Speaker 11: for in death. My name was Brenda Brisket and even.
Speaker 3: And she never gets to finish her all right?
Speaker 2: Oh well yeah, well that's you guys, Sigma. I thought
Speaker 2: it's something really sick on your one offhand claw. You
Speaker 2: should just like have d E a t H on
Speaker 2: your nails. As you just like scraights like that would
Speaker 2: be cool.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, Sigma bad needs for you. The meat men
Speaker 4: are up.
Speaker 1: Oh no, and they come and they go, I don't
Speaker 1: think you can.
Speaker 3: You can't hold our mother can take a bit of meat.
Speaker 1: They killed your you killed their mom.
Speaker 3: You don't care what I now. It's time for you
Speaker 3: to get meated.
Speaker 1: I don't threatening.
Speaker 3: Oh they did to damage?
Speaker 1: How about that motherfucker took.
Speaker 5: From his meat what once his armor class? I might
Speaker 5: be able to reduce the attack.
Speaker 1: He I mean you is actually very low.
Speaker 3: I will say, yeah you can if you want to.
Speaker 4: It's damage.
Speaker 1: I could stop you from taking two damage.
Speaker 6: You you could draw the fabia from me to question
Speaker 6: my captain's progative.
Speaker 1: You want the two damage, that's fine.
Speaker 3: There is a second meat man coming, and you don't know,
Speaker 3: maybe he'll do more.
Speaker 1: Yeah no he didn't.
Speaker 3: He the second one, missus.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it'd be fun. One has a D four, the
Speaker 1: other one is a D twenty. Is there?
Speaker 3: It still rolls one somehow?
Speaker 1: It still rolls one about? Yeah? They so you okay,
Speaker 1: I'm fine, captain. I was worried.
Speaker 4: They're sort of at your knee height slapping you with
Speaker 4: their meat sort of just slapping it against you.
Speaker 3: My each meat meat is that's what they sound.
Speaker 1: Like, Sigma getting meat sloppy. What are we doing?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Sorry, I'm very sick. Please forgive me.
Speaker 1: Very sick. That's the way you said that. I'm just
Speaker 1: the level of like trying. Sorry.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, sorry, it's gonna get slabbed by a meat monstrosity.
Speaker 3: He does, he gets slammed for rick planning. Is your turn?
Speaker 3: There are two meat men by Sigma, but right behind
Speaker 3: you is a very weak meat monstrosity, one that looks
Speaker 3: seconds away from dying.
Speaker 5: Should have stayed outside the forest. You guys have pretty
Speaker 5: much dealt with all of this. Right, let's see what
Speaker 5: we've got. I want that rifle whenever she just dropped,
Speaker 5: I want that rifle. Can we all agree that I'm
Speaker 5: okay taking that rifle?
Speaker 1: Boss?
Speaker 2: The rifles on the ground, that's that's It's belong to
Speaker 2: anybody that picks it up.
Speaker 5: Now, fantastic, right, I'll turn around, you massive meat monstrosity.
Speaker 5: I'll just give up and die right now. Please, I'm
Speaker 5: about to cast vicious mockeration. Yeah I think yeah, it
Speaker 5: must succeed a wisdom saving throw or take one D
Speaker 5: six psychic damage today.
Speaker 4: Yeah, he definitely fails do the decent excellent damage for me.
Speaker 4: Please this does have a small tons of night killed him,
Speaker 4: so he and.
Speaker 3: He explodes all over you.
Speaker 4: Oh god, Yeah, I'm going to say this about the
Speaker 4: meat Montrosity. Inside the meat months Atrosity is like a
Speaker 4: normal animal, like a zebra that sort of just also
Speaker 4: explodes like a like a russianistic dog. These layers of animals,
Speaker 4: because what's the zebra explodes?
Speaker 3: Oh, there's a cat, and then it's like a giddy.
Speaker 4: Pig, and it's then it's like a rat, and then
Speaker 4: like a fly and exploding one after another.
Speaker 2: I look at the one I knocked out, like, is
Speaker 2: that the same thing for this one? You can only assume, Uh,
Speaker 2: maybe it's different.
Speaker 1: I don't know. I'm not really an animal expert.
Speaker 5: Anyway, Well that's dead. I'd like to walk over to
Speaker 5: the rifle and and pick that up.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it technically is, but I'm just gonna love to
Speaker 4: do it because the only thing left of the meat
Speaker 4: men and I.
Speaker 1: Do you need a hand with the meat man? Or
Speaker 1: are you okay that I have befied.
Speaker 3: Navina deal with the meat men?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 4: It would be Crumb's turned, but just Crumb goes Navina,
Speaker 4: can you deal with those meat men?
Speaker 3: I have to reload. I will handle the neat Yeah,
Speaker 3: that hits, and do the other one. Listen, that also hits.
Speaker 4: I want to state for the record that they have
Speaker 4: an ARMA class of one and an HP of one.
Speaker 12: So she takes one like because they're like next to
Speaker 12: her currently both on either side.
Speaker 4: Just one arm up, boom boom or boom, and now
Speaker 4: the combat is over.
Speaker 3: Two things are going to happen immediately.
Speaker 1: It was scary. Friends. Luckily we are vegetarians.
Speaker 3: The rhyme.
Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you Wow.
Speaker 4: Procket's going to walk over to the animal monstrosity that
Speaker 4: that you knock unconscious Crag and Pocket goes, all.
Speaker 3: Right, you want me to kill his one?
Speaker 2: No, it shall be the mighty Steed of Spud Russet,
Speaker 2: for he is the cross carr.
Speaker 4: Pocket's then going to look over to Rick Plan and
Speaker 4: go Cabdin. I think Cragg wants to try and tame
Speaker 4: this untamable beast. I can just put it out of
Speaker 4: its miseryview.
Speaker 1: I mean, the.
Speaker 2: Pocket, you don't know that it's untamable. Sierra goes, there's
Speaker 2: a thing that we learned in university called the scientific method.
Speaker 2: See what you gotta do is you got to test
Speaker 2: your hypothesis over and over again.
Speaker 1: Rocket.
Speaker 5: I appreciate the fact that you've got a thousand degree
Speaker 5: glowing knife and your hand rubb. Now I have to say,
Speaker 5: my personal point of view, that's remarkably cool. But consider
Speaker 5: this pocket I okay, considering how interesting do you think
Speaker 5: he would be to watch Crag attempts to tame that beast?
Speaker 5: I mean, you can always kill it afterwards, but might
Speaker 5: be entertaining to watch.
Speaker 3: That's a really good point, Rick, I didn't know you
Speaker 3: had the same sense of humor as me.
Speaker 5: Well, it's not every day you're going to get a
Speaker 5: chance to watch a Nashcar attempt to tame a meat beast.
Speaker 3: That's why you're the cats in.
Speaker 1: Rick, have a look at this rifle.
Speaker 4: Okay, you look at the rifle. You can't really decay.
Speaker 4: I mean, besides using it, you don't really know what
Speaker 4: it does.
Speaker 5: I think the best thing to do is to not
Speaker 5: use this until a moment would call for it, then
Speaker 5: use it and really hope it does what I think
Speaker 5: it's going to do.
Speaker 1: That's perfect.
Speaker 4: Make sure you put briskets rifle into your inventory as
Speaker 4: you don't forget about it, right, Oh boy, would.
Speaker 1: You search the rest of prendice things?
Speaker 9: It's very bloody, Yes, of course, I'll see what else
Speaker 9: she has on her Yeah, she has a variety of items,
Speaker 9: but they're mostly just ways to prepare food, like cookery stuff.
Speaker 3: She also has her diplomas, like her PhDs, just to
Speaker 3: like prove that she has it all the time.
Speaker 1: You know what, of course, and it has a name
Speaker 1: when it I assume, oh.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and you know it says valedictorian. That's the American thing,
Speaker 4: right where it's.
Speaker 1: Like whatever, yeah, number one in your class.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, it's like number one in the class.
Speaker 4: And Crumb looks over and he's like, oh, I only
Speaker 4: got this and it just has number two in his class.
Speaker 1: Crumb. Yes, you're given some time.
Speaker 6: I'm sure I could edit these documents to seem a
Speaker 6: lot more impressive for you.
Speaker 4: Well, I appreciate that, but if I'm going to become
Speaker 4: the world's greatest the universe is greatest food scientist, I
Speaker 4: want to do it on my own merits.
Speaker 3: I don't want to do it through forgery and trickery.
Speaker 1: Listen, you shot her in the face for like twelve damage.
Speaker 1: I think that is your own merit.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and to be fair, sigma technically by default. Now
Speaker 4: I am the greatest food scientist of that class. Very true,
Speaker 4: it was a class of two.
Speaker 1: I started to get that impression.
Speaker 7: Yeah, oh you did so well, crumb.
Speaker 3: Thanks Navina? How did you did you do it? Sorry?
Speaker 3: I feel like I I'm so hot right now?
Speaker 11: Sorry, I don't is that you or is that cre flirting?
Speaker 1: This is not the time nor the place. Open a window,
Speaker 1: turn on the do something.
Speaker 4: I was in this little room. I have never been
Speaker 4: this hot before, running d and.
Speaker 2: D oh my god, get a fan.
Speaker 4: Sure, I order one right now. I'm sure it all right,
Speaker 4: I'm a single fan. Okay, Well I have millions taken. No. Yeah, Navina,
Speaker 4: how did you You did a really good job against
Speaker 4: those the way you slapped that meat?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 1: Thank you?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Did you see that?
Speaker 4: Did you see the way that I did, the the way.
Speaker 1: I stressed work? It worked so well that you designed
Speaker 1: that off me.
Speaker 4: Yeah, because I saw the way that you you were
Speaker 4: stretched out by krag and I was able to, you know,
Speaker 4: create my chrome chrume catapult and I filled out with
Speaker 4: fruit and I have these little fairy cakes I want
Speaker 4: to put into it as well that I've been baking.
Speaker 3: And oh and the remains of these meat men.
Speaker 4: I can make it a little like like meat, like
Speaker 4: awfully meatballs and also put them in there as well.
Speaker 3: And I could just different types of pellets.
Speaker 1: It's so versatile.
Speaker 3: I know, I just I never really thought about using
Speaker 3: food as weaponry outside of making it sentient. But you know,
Speaker 3: you've showed me.
Speaker 4: You showed me there's there's more to this world than
Speaker 4: just burgers and fries.
Speaker 1: It's very true.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, well, yeah, he sort of just sort
Speaker 3: of looks around.
Speaker 4: Yeah, looks around a little bit.
Speaker 3: Well, I was very messy and very lovely. But we
Speaker 3: need to make haste.
Speaker 4: We still have a little bit of a travel to
Speaker 4: get to the slaughter fort itself.
Speaker 3: You Rick, do you agree or.
Speaker 1: Absolutely to continue moving on.
Speaker 5: I was actually going to interject after you said that
Speaker 5: lovely line there's more to this world and burgers and fries.
Speaker 5: I was going to say he's quite romantic when he tries,
Speaker 5: because I just wanted to feel involved in everything.
Speaker 1: Sigma.
Speaker 5: Also what you did with that throat thing earlier. If
Speaker 5: they continue talking, can you do that to me as well. Yes,
Speaker 5: thank you, Right, Okay, I've got a rifle. I'd like
Speaker 5: to pick up the two meat pistols as well. But
Speaker 5: anyone like these or am I okay taking them?
Speaker 3: Siera's going to look at you and go, You're not
Speaker 3: going to use them, are you?
Speaker 1: Not? Unless the situation calls for it.
Speaker 4: I think it's very morally wrong to do so, to
Speaker 4: create life to something with his purpose is to fight
Speaker 4: and die.
Speaker 5: I agree, But I believe it's more morally wrong for
Speaker 5: me to die. So if I'm going to have a
Speaker 5: choice between doing that and firing these, I'm going to
Speaker 5: fire these. It'll be a last case scenario, don't you worry.
Speaker 4: They are more important things I need to put my
Speaker 4: enerity towards. But just know that there's a pop up.
Speaker 3: On your screen right now that says Sierra dislike that.
Speaker 5: Absolutely, store them somewhere, Grab the rifle, right. How's your
Speaker 5: whole taming thing going?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, actually, boss, I was going to ask you
Speaker 2: about that. See, I was gonna, like you try to
Speaker 2: wake this up, and I was wondering if you had
Speaker 2: some kind of magic rick, human power that could, like,
Speaker 2: you know, make it listen to us a little bit
Speaker 2: more iconicact.
Speaker 5: I can try and do that for you. I can
Speaker 5: attempt to potentially convince it to listen to you. But
Speaker 5: there's two things that you need to understand with that. One,
Speaker 5: as soon as that magic wears off, it's going to
Speaker 5: dislike me. And two, No, this is a huge responsibility.
Speaker 5: Are you going to take it out for walks? Are
Speaker 5: you going to clean up after it? It's not I
Speaker 5: have I have my own my own pet, Magma mammoth
Speaker 5: back home. His name is Spud actually weirdly enough, and.
Speaker 1: That is weird.
Speaker 3: It's very odd.
Speaker 5: So you know how to take care of it, and
Speaker 5: you understand the responsibility that you'll be taking on.
Speaker 3: Wait, so I will not be You said you're you've
Speaker 3: left it at home, which I think is one O one.
Speaker 3: You're not taking care of it.
Speaker 2: I have parents and an older sister and her husband
Speaker 2: that are currently taking after it.
Speaker 5: I do not abandon my pets, Crag. You might need
Speaker 5: to understand it. When we get back to Sassy the Ship.
Speaker 5: You may need to abandon this pet.
Speaker 1: Well, you know how about I wasn't at you use
Speaker 1: like magic or something. I thought you're just have a
Speaker 1: way with words, boss, I thought you could maybe calm
Speaker 1: it down that way. And if it wants to run
Speaker 1: off and just live in the wild meat yonder, that's
Speaker 1: that's its own decision.
Speaker 5: As long as you understand Crag that if you truly
Speaker 5: do love something, you sometimes have to let it go
Speaker 5: into the meat forest.
Speaker 1: That's okay.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna try to wake up and we'll see if
Speaker 2: this works. And if it doesn't work, Spud, we'll have
Speaker 2: to find you another mount somewhere.
Speaker 13: Okay.
Speaker 5: So what I'll do is I'll be right behind you
Speaker 5: and i'll support you if needed. But I have faith
Speaker 5: that you can do this, and you do not need
Speaker 5: any input from me. I'd like to give him bodic inspiration.
Speaker 1: I'm very inspired by that.
Speaker 3: Yes, okay, the animal monstrousity up.
Speaker 1: Can I just wake it up? Or you want me
Speaker 1: to do a check for that?
Speaker 3: You can wake it up. So I'm gonna wake it up.
Speaker 3: His eyes slowly open up.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna look at it.
Speaker 3: Like four tusks are sort of bristling. He looks over.
Speaker 2: I get in a position that is very non threatening, right, okay,
Speaker 2: and I just I just like listen, It's okay, You're
Speaker 2: gonna be all.
Speaker 3: Right, right, Crag, this is your only chance.
Speaker 4: You have an advantage because of your thing, and Rick
Speaker 4: plan is giving you the extra D six.
Speaker 14: So Rick, can you row me to D six now? Yes,
Speaker 14: so we know straight away. I also have that's two.
Speaker 14: But I also have tactical mind. If I fail in
Speaker 14: ability check, I can roll a D ten for a
Speaker 14: second win.
Speaker 1: Use shit. So this might actually I might be getting
Speaker 1: a mammoth today.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, you critically hits your autible handling check.
Speaker 2: Calm, this is fuck bad. This It is alright, gentle beast.
Speaker 2: I am Crag, son of Kronk. This is Spuds, son
Speaker 2: of actually Spud. Who's your father?
Speaker 3: My dad? Sorry, I'm just dad, my son of my dad. No,
Speaker 3: I'm thinking about my wife.
Speaker 4: He could be in trouble right now and we're just
Speaker 4: standing around monsters.
Speaker 2: I will pick up Spud and set him on top
Speaker 2: of the meat abomination as his royal steed. Oh god, okay,
Speaker 2: it with like a twenty. That's a dirty twenty with
Speaker 2: the inspiration. I don't know if that'll work.
Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, I mean okay, okay.
Speaker 4: An animal handling check does not completely tame it.
Speaker 3: It just makes it non aggressive towards you. Yes, holy shit.
Speaker 4: So he's looking at you now, and he's like, and
Speaker 4: Spud is sort of sitting on top of it. And
Speaker 4: it doesn't like that because there's no easy place for
Speaker 4: Spud to sit, because he's like sitting on an eyeball,
Speaker 4: or like a shark fin randomly, or like there's like
Speaker 4: half for camel hump here, you know. So he's like,
Speaker 4: I don't you know, I think sput is going to
Speaker 4: jump off quite quickly.
Speaker 2: That's fair, that's fair, Okay, looking at You'll see if
Speaker 2: we can make that work, and want to come with me.
Speaker 2: I rip off some meat from a nearby tree and
Speaker 2: present it to the animal, and like, would you like
Speaker 2: to journey with us?
Speaker 4: He sniffs the meat and his giant mouth opens up
Speaker 4: and and takes it in his mouth.
Speaker 1: Ah, that's adorable.
Speaker 4: And and he sort of looks up at you with
Speaker 4: his eleven big eyes and he looks over and you
Speaker 4: can see in the distance now three little tiny meat monstrosities.
Speaker 3: Oh it's a dam, And he looks up at you.
Speaker 2: They can journey with us. We'll all be one big,
Speaker 2: happy family.
Speaker 1: I see what you're trying. I see what you're trying
Speaker 1: to do. And I think it's that fired, because that
Speaker 1: was just.
Speaker 3: He's shaking his head.
Speaker 1: Okay, many heads. You have your children, you have your life.
Speaker 2: Just stay away from the dangers that are about to
Speaker 2: befall your land.
Speaker 1: Be safe.
Speaker 4: And he nods his head, and I will say, because
Speaker 4: of the crit because of everything, you have befriended this monster.
Speaker 4: For if you travel through the slaughter forests again in
Speaker 4: the future, no harm shall come to you. For the
Speaker 4: beast of this forest know you as an ally and
Speaker 4: not a foe. Beautiful and he walks off.
Speaker 2: There's a beautiful moment where it walks away in the sunset,
Speaker 2: and I'm just, oh.
Speaker 5: Right, I'm glad we made an ally. I have to
Speaker 5: admit that I admire your approach of taming the beast,
Speaker 5: whereas I just effectively told one to die.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry that we couldn't get you a loyal mount.
Speaker 1: One day we shall.
Speaker 3: Pocket runs over to the corpse and starts shoving slabs
Speaker 3: of the mystery meat into his bag, into into his pockets.
Speaker 3: This could sound really good, you know, off planets where
Speaker 3: they don't know what it is. I could you know,
Speaker 3: And Sierra says, we should fucking go.
Speaker 1: I am so on your side here.
Speaker 5: You know what, maybe now that it's definitely safe because
Speaker 5: of the monster, we should camp here for the night
Speaker 5: in order to replenish all of our supplies.
Speaker 2: You know what, Rick, Boss, that actually sounds like a
Speaker 2: good idea because I am kind of hurt right now.
Speaker 5: As well with the family you've just befriended.
Speaker 2: Crame, I wouldn't say, nobody had to be honest with you.
Speaker 4: How late is it in the Yeah, well apparently sunset
Speaker 4: now according to Teching, So probably you guys regardless of
Speaker 4: the time, and you guys will have to camp out
Speaker 4: before you get to the slaughter forges. You will have
Speaker 4: to long rest at some point.
Speaker 2: Because a better time to do it. Now we have
Speaker 2: befriended the forest monster.
Speaker 4: So you you'll travel for as long as you can
Speaker 4: until you can find a suitable place to rest for
Speaker 4: the night. I assume you guys now know how to
Speaker 4: make camp pretty well. You've done it a few times.
Speaker 1: Now.
Speaker 3: You can set up your you can make a place
Speaker 3: in the camp.
Speaker 4: Sierra's brought her own like glamping set that she sets out.
Speaker 4: It's like really nice and she goes, nobody come in
Speaker 4: here whilst I'm sleeping Okay.
Speaker 1: Well, of course not, that's your personal space. I would
Speaker 1: never you.
Speaker 4: Know, before you guys do actually sleep, you guys, can
Speaker 4: I assume we'll have a moment where you can sit
Speaker 4: around sort of the campfire and kind of just like
Speaker 4: enjoy eating some food and chilling out.
Speaker 1: Can we that's the question.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well you have enough that you you have your
Speaker 4: level is enough that you could eat something. And Sierra
Speaker 4: is gonna publicly make some terrible food for you guys
Speaker 4: so that you can still eat.
Speaker 1: Thank you. This is brilliant trash shd. It's incredible. Can
Speaker 1: we see other people's food level?
Speaker 3: Uh? It's cars Yeah, it's all it's all the cards, right,
Speaker 3: So yes, you can.
Speaker 6: I just I wanted to know if we could, if
Speaker 6: we can know Sierra's food level?
Speaker 3: Yeah, So who do you want to ask her? Because
Speaker 3: you don't see.
Speaker 6: If it's not like something that we can just see obviously,
Speaker 6: if it's just on that card, then then I'll be
Speaker 6: like that. So Sierra, I was curious, as one of
Speaker 6: the warlords, as the grand chef, what what is your
Speaker 6: food level?
Speaker 1: How has this war affected you?
Speaker 3: She looks over. Ah, but you'll see I don't I
Speaker 3: don't have one.
Speaker 1: Ah.
Speaker 4: I mean, I was part of the group that set
Speaker 4: up the system we'll begin with, and we didn't give
Speaker 4: them to ourselves.
Speaker 1: I see.
Speaker 6: Now that that makes sense. That makes sense. You know
Speaker 6: you are being a leader above.
Speaker 4: Trust me, listen, trust me. It was the only way
Speaker 4: that we could maintain peace between the war we had.
Speaker 4: It was a powder keg about to explode. We all
Speaker 4: came together. We decided to create this system into which
Speaker 4: neutrality can be kept. You know, we didn't want random
Speaker 4: revolts popping up all over the place, splintering our kingdoms
Speaker 4: even more. It is yes, you may seem it may
Speaker 4: seem immoral to you, obviously, but like the people who
Speaker 4: you know, unfortunately it's gone a bit hay wire at
Speaker 4: the moment because of the war. But the people who
Speaker 4: who fell, you know, there were criminals in it, and
Speaker 4: there were meat eaters, for example, in my terrortory. You know,
Speaker 4: there were people who directly disobeyed the law of the land.
Speaker 4: And you know, in in every other society there is
Speaker 4: a pun of system for that. They would go to jail,
Speaker 4: they would be you know, some people, we don't even
Speaker 4: have capital punishment. This is just slightly changing your your
Speaker 4: menu options. Honestly, I think it's pretty tame compared to
Speaker 4: most people.
Speaker 1: I agree.
Speaker 5: In that case, you should probably have it yourself. If
Speaker 5: it is that time.
Speaker 4: No no, no, no, no no no no, no no no,
Speaker 4: I see what you're trying to do here, Rick, and listen.
Speaker 4: I'm all for you modifying the system. We I am
Speaker 4: not here to say it is the be all end
Speaker 4: or we are going to go to the machine putting
Speaker 4: all of the cards and we're going to change it
Speaker 4: so that only people can eat non animal products, but
Speaker 4: we will remove the level system completely. I'm happy. I'm
Speaker 4: happy with that. So we're not enemies here. We've already
Speaker 4: agreed to this.
Speaker 6: Yes, no, no, no, we're we're not enemies. We're not enemies.
Speaker 6: We might I hope you understand. So I'm whispering you
Speaker 6: may end up enemies with her. Yes, no, I understand that,
Speaker 6: because right now she's a very strong ally.
Speaker 5: Oh absolutely, yes, very strong ally. I mean I actually.
Speaker 1: Definitely seems the least evil of these guys.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, absolutely, that like the least evil. Like it's
Speaker 5: a low bar, the bars on the borrowing under it slowly,
Speaker 5: but definitely least evil.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
Speaker 5: But We're going to get rid of this and the
Speaker 5: planet's going to go back to everyone can eat whatever
Speaker 5: the hell they want.
Speaker 1: Oh, of course, yes, okay, go along, run the van
Speaker 1: bomble with that.
Speaker 4: Okay, right, Uh, Sierra is gonna turn to Novena. Now, well,
Speaker 4: I guess whilst you two are having that private conversation,
Speaker 4: Sierra will turn to Novena and go. I have not
Speaker 4: been outside of Yestoviia for so long. How are the
Speaker 4: you know, the Velinari planets. Oh, they were prospering when
Speaker 4: I left.
Speaker 3: Are great?
Speaker 1: You know? Yes? I was.
Speaker 7: I was wondering. I I was whisked away in the
Speaker 7: midst of all of this. Yeah, quite, in the midst
Speaker 7: of my training. I I know you have a stronger
Speaker 7: connection with the flow than I do. Yes, yes, would
Speaker 7: you mind teaching me some more? Of course, Navina, it
Speaker 7: would be my honor to do so. See, I, unlike
Speaker 7: a lot of the other warlords, I did not grow
Speaker 7: up here on this planet, hu. I came here later
Speaker 7: in life. I so, I have the fundamental teachings down,
Speaker 7: but I have developed my own style, you know, And
Speaker 7: I can show you a few things through the ropes.
Speaker 3: A little bit.
Speaker 1: I would be so grateful.
Speaker 3: I've been thinking that after this is all over, I
Speaker 3: could like vacation somewhere somewhere, visit my distant Vulinari planets again,
Speaker 3: would be nice.
Speaker 1: You should you should go to Mariness.
Speaker 4: It is.
Speaker 3: It is so quaint, but it is, I said, Marion,
Speaker 3: this sort of rings a bell to me.
Speaker 1: Is where ah?
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, that's where they're having
Speaker 4: that big celebration, the big ah the big execution.
Speaker 1: Execution.
Speaker 3: Oh yes, yes, I can't quite remember the details, but
Speaker 3: it's a lot of valinaria A traveling far and wide
Speaker 3: to go see it because it's one of the you know,
Speaker 3: it's the first time in a long time that you
Speaker 3: people are doing a big public execution like that. But
Speaker 3: you know, yes, I did not think we did those anymore, No,
Speaker 3: but I guess it is a change of ways. I
Speaker 3: guess they're doing a big for to really get the
Speaker 3: great flow. You know, there's push out some of the
Speaker 3: non believing Velluinari, that sort of thing.
Speaker 1: Who is who is being executed?
Speaker 4: I can't quite remember the name, but you know what,
Speaker 4: let me check a I definitely got a news thing
Speaker 4: about it. Give me she's gonna go into her her
Speaker 4: glamping tent. Now she's gonna like she comes out with
Speaker 4: like a one of like one of her little hollow
Speaker 4: deck things, and she pulls up this like news article
Speaker 4: and it says it is this terrible criminal, terrible criminal,
Speaker 4: it is Azarina. She has been arrested for murdering an archbishop,
Speaker 4: high treason. I mean it's never really been done for centuries,
Speaker 4: centuries even that anybody's killed an archbishop, especially a Vellunari.
Speaker 4: So I mean she's got what's coming to her. I
Speaker 4: could see why they've resorted for execution this time.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm hm, what what do you excuse me for
Speaker 1: just a moment?
Speaker 3: Oh, yes, of course, of course.
Speaker 1: The leader is going to leave and just wander into
Speaker 1: the forest.
Speaker 4: Well I mean yeah, sort of mildly keeping track of
Speaker 4: where she is, but she's just wandered off.
Speaker 3: Holy shit.
Speaker 4: Well, I think Crumb will probably notice that and go
Speaker 4: and we'll run after you and sort of follow you
Speaker 4: into the forest and go, Navna Narvina, where are you going?
Speaker 5: Of course they're going into the forest together.
Speaker 1: I mean I think we should let them.
Speaker 5: I mean, oh, you're right, crag Love, young Love, we're
Speaker 5: here for one night.
Speaker 2: With it.
Speaker 1: You know enjoy.
Speaker 2: I'm working on something, but we'll do this first.
Speaker 1: Not now, crme. I I think I need to be
Speaker 1: alone for a while.
Speaker 3: Are you Are you sure?
Speaker 4: I mean, I listen if you have anything you need
Speaker 4: to talk about. I'm really happy to. I know I'm not,
Speaker 4: you know, the greatest conversational list ever, but you you
Speaker 4: know you've helped talk to me when I feel low
Speaker 4: I have, you know, and I'm not the easiest to
Speaker 4: deal with.
Speaker 3: And I just I don't need to be alone out here.
Speaker 1: Please, just I want to be alone.
Speaker 3: Okay. He sort of walks up, but he he puts
Speaker 3: down a little small gelatine sphere that has a little
Speaker 3: face on it and says, well, when I'm gone, you
Speaker 3: could talk to to Slimy here. I made him as
Speaker 3: a little guy. I thought it'd be a nice little Okay,
Speaker 3: I'm going to go, and he he turns back to camp.
Speaker 5: Bloody hell crime that was first.
Speaker 3: Because of that.
Speaker 4: Yeah, the Vida is just gonna sort of sit down,
Speaker 4: bring a knees up to a chest and just start weeping. Oh,
Speaker 4: just just bawling just as quietly as she can. But
Speaker 4: she's distraught right now?
Speaker 5: Is mean?
Speaker 1: All right? Crumb?
Speaker 4: I think she just wants to be left alone. Right now,
Speaker 4: I'm gonna make sense to to my food tent.
Speaker 1: All right, Well, the forest is safe, so I think
Speaker 1: she'll be fine.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, And Crumb's gonna sort of leave and go into
Speaker 4: his tent. All right, Craig, what did you want to do?
Speaker 4: How many knives can I make it?
Speaker 3: Once?
Speaker 1: I don't I don't even know. I'm just I am
Speaker 1: just I want to make sure everybody's armed.
Speaker 2: Well, so I was just gonna take this time to
Speaker 2: make some obsidian knives and give them to people.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know how many I can make it.
Speaker 4: Just off your body, yeah, I mean rich, They're not
Speaker 4: even that strong. You can just rip off time.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but just hey one, hey, everybody can Okay, everybody
Speaker 2: gets it upsidian knife.
Speaker 1: I give one to Crumb.
Speaker 4: M right, Crumb's already gone, so but I throw I
Speaker 4: throw it at it and you can see him sort
Speaker 4: of half naked, like getting it through his pajamas.
Speaker 1: Now that now that's a sharp knife. I know that
Speaker 1: one worked.
Speaker 3: Well, oh my days.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, okay, okay, all right, everybody's got an obsidian knife,
Speaker 2: including Spud and Crumb and anybody else that needs I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: Those might come in handy. You never know. I'll keep
Speaker 1: up Nevina's on me for when she comes.
Speaker 3: Anything else that you guys want to do before you
Speaker 3: guys sleep for the night.
Speaker 5: I would like to have a look at I've got
Speaker 5: the meat rifle. I don't know what it does yet,
Speaker 5: but I'd like to have a look at one of
Speaker 5: the meat pistols. No, I know this just fus a
Speaker 5: splurge of meat out of the end, But is the
Speaker 5: any way that I could start the process of converting
Speaker 5: this to fire shards of crag?
Speaker 3: That's really interesting? Will I do want to say that
Speaker 3: you do also have another normal gun?
Speaker 5: Yes, I've got the Globo Bites blaster, which also doubles
Speaker 5: up as a condoment a casual must have done.
Speaker 4: You would find it'd be a lot easier to convert
Speaker 4: that because that actually has to be pulsion. The Meatman
Speaker 4: gun doesn't fire. It like they don't shoot out, they
Speaker 4: crawl out. It creates life.
Speaker 5: In that case, would I be able to take one
Speaker 5: of the meat men guns, just assemble it to the
Speaker 5: best of my ability and use the bits from it
Speaker 5: to improve the Globo bites burger gun.
Speaker 4: Probably in order to I'm going to be honest with pulsion.
Speaker 4: The best of your ability is not very high. But
Speaker 4: I think Sigma could do that.
Speaker 1: Sigma, I've had a nis away. I'd like to try.
Speaker 3: It.
Speaker 1: He's just impale straight through the hand. You have a knife.
Speaker 1: You have a knife.
Speaker 5: You have a knife. I want to fire shards of
Speaker 5: that knife out of this gun, and improve the ability
Speaker 5: to do it by taking apart this gun. However, I
Speaker 5: think you probably know a bit more about the tag
Speaker 5: behind it than I do. If I leave this with you,
Speaker 5: would you be able to possibly improve this gun?
Speaker 6: I mean none of none of the guns that I've
Speaker 6: disassembled in the past have been made of meat, But
Speaker 6: I mean, how different can it be?
Speaker 1: You know, I can give it a try.
Speaker 5: That's what I was thinking. Thank you very much. I'll
Speaker 5: know you are further. I'd like to hand my guns
Speaker 5: over to him.
Speaker 3: At this point, will go wait second, Sorry, I was
Speaker 3: doing my own thing.
Speaker 1: I wasn't paying attention.
Speaker 3: He comes storming over the meat gun.
Speaker 1: There you go.
Speaker 3: Oh wait, this is a competition. Yes, which of us
Speaker 3: can make improve this gun better?
Speaker 1: Oh? Yes? Do you wait?
Speaker 5: That's exactly what I was going for Pocket, you are
Speaker 5: one step ahead of us.
Speaker 1: As always, I'm gonna make it.
Speaker 3: So good, it will be the best. It will be
Speaker 3: the greatest gun you ever busied, terrifying.
Speaker 5: I do have to stress that I know that you
Speaker 5: probably could improve the Globo bites burger gun that I've
Speaker 5: just given you by taking the parts of the meat gun.
Speaker 5: But I am now actually a little bit scared of
Speaker 5: what kind of gun Pocket's going to give me back. Yes,
Speaker 5: I don't know what you've just started. He's going to
Speaker 5: do what I believe. What I've started is what we
Speaker 5: used to call back on Earth and arms race. Now
Speaker 5: they normally don't.
Speaker 3: Earth. We don't know if that exists back.
Speaker 5: On Panjae at the World Chap, This start what we're
Speaker 5: calling arms race, where slowly things will escalate, and what
Speaker 5: we just kind of hope is that it stops at
Speaker 5: some point.
Speaker 3: Mm hmm, Well, he goes crossed.
Speaker 15: Maybe maybe something good comes of all this, all right,
Speaker 15: Maybe Sierra's gone back into her head, as she says again, please,
Speaker 15: nobody can we do here?
Speaker 3: Whis they am sleeping? So nobody is planning to good?
Speaker 1: We do not invade each other's personal space.
Speaker 3: Okay, I don't know, you guys, I just don't know. Okay,
Speaker 3: I'm just making sure. You just do a knife at
Speaker 3: christ thing and nobody Okay. She goes inside, okay, well
Speaker 3: and pockets heads her hard. It goes.
Speaker 1: We gotta go inside there, right, boundaries, pocket respect all right?
Speaker 1: Now have this knife?
Speaker 3: Oh yes, I need that hmm.
Speaker 4: And he's okay, he's working away into the night. Okay,
Speaker 4: I guess everyone's sleeping now. Yep, Navina will come back
Speaker 4: at some point. She's been visibly visibly crying.
Speaker 3: But after everybody else is asleep. Yeah, okay.
Speaker 1: And then I will say that the stigma would not
Speaker 1: have gone to bed until Navena returned. I would have
Speaker 1: approached her when she comes back.
Speaker 6: He just would have kind of been like a semi
Speaker 6: watch things.
Speaker 1: Yes, but he's not going to approach her about it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: he just wanted to make sure she was back.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 4: So you sort of give her a nod, and then
Speaker 4: everyone goes to rest, and the morning comes and everyone
Speaker 4: gets up and you guys continue your journey. What a
Speaker 4: wonderful morning.
Speaker 1: Man.
Speaker 2: You know, I didn't think the entire forest would be meat,
Speaker 2: but yeah, the entire forest is meat.
Speaker 3: Isn't it disgusting? It makes me.
Speaker 2: I know, I mean, I don't really have normal I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't have like gooey's skin like you all do.
Speaker 2: And even I'm starting to feel it in my cracks.
Speaker 2: It's a little bit weird.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, look, I'm I'm liking we like to
Speaker 6: eat a lot of meat typically, but this is really gross.
Speaker 2: This is probably like matting in your fur and everything.
Speaker 2: It's probably like, yeah, I.
Speaker 1: Need to wash.
Speaker 4: So many pop ups on your screen. Sigma of Sierra
Speaker 4: dislike that. Sierra dislike that sire Like it's just like
Speaker 4: in the sims with the minus and then.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like a perpetual frowny face over Sierra, like
Speaker 2: every time you look at.
Speaker 4: Her, and Pocket looks over and sees these pop ups
Speaker 4: and then goes, I love a good carrot.
Speaker 3: And then Sierra gets against the plus seids.
Speaker 6: Just to clarify, I'm from a planet that has no
Speaker 6: native wildlife. We do not hunt and kill. It's manufactured meat.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, that makes sense. Then and plus plus plus plus.
Speaker 1: And I just eat rocks, m all right.
Speaker 4: So you guys, all right, Eventually you guys leave the
Speaker 4: slaughter forests and you enter the domain of the Slaughter
Speaker 4: Forge itself. Ahead of you you see what looks like
Speaker 4: a giant volcano oven type and the city of the
Speaker 4: Slaughter Forge. But importantly importantly to the left you see
Speaker 4: a horde of candy Knights charging to war towards the city.
Speaker 4: But behind the sort of fifteen or so candy nights
Speaker 4: you see hundreds of what looks to be civilians with
Speaker 4: weaponry and makeshift armor, also charging like raised levies.
Speaker 1: Oh look at that.
Speaker 3: Over there, galloping towards you. It's not a rebellion.
Speaker 4: Galloping towards you on a robotic horse much like your owns.
Speaker 4: Is a candy knight. And he's come towards you as
Speaker 4: he because he's just spotted you, guys. Come out, and
Speaker 4: he's been waiting for you guys, and he comes up.
Speaker 4: He goes, oh, rolo, sir bo. But you can call
Speaker 4: me Harry. It's a pleasure to make your own credence.
Speaker 4: I am here on behalf of Queen Marleseypan.
Speaker 1: Okay, soudle.
Speaker 4: She did warn me that you guys do that. But
Speaker 4: don't worry be rude. I will until you huddle, all right,
Speaker 4: in the huddle, what.
Speaker 5: Are we doing, boss, So uh, it seems to some
Speaker 5: kind of civil war, a rebellion going on. Marsapan is
Speaker 5: attacking the slaughter forgers, which I still think could just
Speaker 5: be laughter forgers with an S in front of it.
Speaker 5: We haven't these people yet. How How involved do we
Speaker 5: want to get on this?
Speaker 1: Well?
Speaker 6: I think perhaps we have. This is perhaps a preemptive huddle, Captain.
Speaker 6: We don't actually know what this guy is coming over
Speaker 6: to see exactly. This could be a party. They could
Speaker 6: all be getting together for a huge, big party. Maybe
Speaker 6: it's a pinata party.
Speaker 1: Do you want us to go to a party?
Speaker 9: No?
Speaker 3: You guys called our queen and told us to send
Speaker 3: men to attack Rack.
Speaker 1: Did we do that? Don't worry? I know that.
Speaker 4: Okay, let's just have to get through this part first. Yeah,
Speaker 4: you've gotta you've got to remind your captain also said
Speaker 4: that's something that you guys have to do.
Speaker 5: So yes, absolutely, it's it's the part of checks and
Speaker 5: balances to make sure the winn are rolling the right thing.
Speaker 3: Did we did we do that?
Speaker 1: So? Did we actually do yes? Yeah, we we called her.
Speaker 6: Oh okay, once we made the alliance with Sierra, we
Speaker 6: asked her to send troops to the slaughter forges to Oh,
Speaker 6: actually we could, yes, so we could sneak in during
Speaker 6: the during the confusion, just so, and then we could
Speaker 6: assassinate their leader.
Speaker 1: Well, this seems to be exactly working in our favor
Speaker 1: of this war.
Speaker 5: All right, everything's got which is all going to plan
Speaker 5: so far.
Speaker 2: Then, so we're going to be fighting with the Candy Knights.
Speaker 1: No, hopefully they're going to be doing that thing.
Speaker 5: I mean, we're on their side, but like we'll be
Speaker 5: sneaking around getting into the thing while that fight's going on.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty good at sneaking around. I think I got
Speaker 2: this will be all right.
Speaker 5: Yeah, the point of the distraction was so we don't
Speaker 5: have to deal with the bulk of their forces.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that makes sense. So should we see what Sir
Speaker 1: Bo has to say? Yeah, both get in the huddle.
Speaker 1: Oh oh oh, I got to join a huddle. If
Speaker 1: you should be you should be proud. This is a
Speaker 1: very high honor. Get in here, right, Bill said.
Speaker 5: What's going on?
Speaker 4: So after you called the Queen, she made the announcements
Speaker 4: to the Knights that we will go attack Rack. But
Speaker 4: all of the men and women of the Candy Kingdom
Speaker 4: wanted revenge for the the slaughter of our king by Rock.
Speaker 1: Which which Wrack is responsible for.
Speaker 3: Ye, because yes, yes, so and and and therefore they
Speaker 3: took off arms of all of the we we raised
Speaker 3: the levees.
Speaker 4: These are men without military training. We gave them a
Speaker 4: bit on the way, but we have the numbers. Yes,
Speaker 4: we lost many men to the gingerbread dragon, as you know.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, that thing.
Speaker 3: These are warriors in spirit and heart, if not at phazekee,
Speaker 3: and they're here for revenge.
Speaker 5: The death of the king has rallied these troops to
Speaker 5: fight more fervently than they would do before.
Speaker 3: Oh, I can't believe do something like that?
Speaker 1: Why why? Just out of curiosity? Why why? Why don't
Speaker 1: you think Rack would have done something like that? What's
Speaker 1: he like as a as a being?
Speaker 3: Oh no, I think he's I think he's an asshole.
Speaker 3: But to kill a king that's insane. Who would ever
Speaker 3: allow that to happen?
Speaker 1: I can't believe anyone, really, I.
Speaker 3: Can't drawing him back. He deserves to be sweet crucified,
Speaker 3: and he does.
Speaker 5: Okay, But just to just to clarify, your troops are
Speaker 5: going to fight extra fervently because they're fighting in memory
Speaker 5: of the king which hang him.
Speaker 3: By candy rope.
Speaker 16: All right, well that's not your but yes, of course
Speaker 16: this is to give your squad the opportunity to get
Speaker 16: inside there and fight him whilst he's undefended.
Speaker 3: His brothers a dead. Yeah, we have gathered.
Speaker 5: Yeah, okay, quick, quick, smaller huddle within the huddle without you,
Speaker 5: sub huddle team, I think at this point. But if
Speaker 5: we do reach Rack, killing him might be a mercy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, this planet faster.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's gonna be rough if we have to fight him.
Speaker 2: Let me just say the weakness of all Ashcar. I'm
Speaker 2: sharing this with you. This is very very important. Do
Speaker 2: not tell anyone else this. If you hit us really
Speaker 2: hard in the head, we die. You share the same
Speaker 2: weakness as humans. Really, you are the same. If you
Speaker 2: hit us really hard in the head, we die as well.
Speaker 2: But it has to be really really hard, like to
Speaker 2: the point you have no head anymore. That's all like, no,
Speaker 2: well we'll die way before that.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, the principle is the same, exactly excellently. Yes, okay, okay,
Speaker 5: so did I mess it up?
Speaker 1: Rustitch? I saw you were a vac It's.
Speaker 3: Just so funny at this moment, though, huddle team coming
Speaker 3: from the a different direction is a different force of
Speaker 3: people engaging with Rax army. It is a horde of
Speaker 3: Chip soldiers.
Speaker 4: A couple of Burger tanks as well is and you
Speaker 4: have somebody who's coming up now in what looks like
Speaker 4: like a delivery van.
Speaker 3: He's driving up to us, to you guys.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it has glober Bites Burger on the side of it.
Speaker 4: And it stops and and a man gets out, and
Speaker 4: he's a large man, and he's got like the Chip
Speaker 4: uniform on and a big thing that says large fry.
Speaker 3: And he goes, where's one of y'all's rick plan.
Speaker 1: Oh that's right here. I hold them up. I didn't
Speaker 1: mean that like that.
Speaker 5: I bet it.
Speaker 1: We're just like Herius. Yeah, just lift here.
Speaker 3: We have lost connection with you back there a little bit,
Speaker 3: but we have our sources. It seems like you're doing
Speaker 3: good work.
Speaker 5: Well, when the chips are down, you've got to do
Speaker 5: the best work you can.
Speaker 3: You stole the words right out of my mouth and
Speaker 3: my Google document. Uh, Carl Junior has launched a full
Speaker 3: frontal attack on Grill Master Rack to revenge the savage
Speaker 3: death of Carl Senior.
Speaker 5: I remember that I remember saying that I'm telling you
Speaker 5: harsh stuff, horrible stuff. You were there, all right, Yes,
Speaker 5: I was hoping I wasn't going to say that specifically
Speaker 5: out loud.
Speaker 1: But yeah, we really know.
Speaker 3: You were innocent. We already went through all that.
Speaker 5: That makes me feel a lot better about this groud situation.
Speaker 3: Yeah, don't worry, don't worry. My name's Wedge. By the way,
Speaker 3: it's nice to me.
Speaker 1: Wedge close to media. Wedge. I'd like to shake his hand.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he shakes your hand. It's nice and greasy.
Speaker 13: Haven't sorry, I haven't washed my hands in a wild Wedge.
Speaker 13: He looks over to see his chrome. He goes, is
Speaker 13: that chromehurious?
Speaker 3: Oh god?
Speaker 4: Sorry, that was real, But actually it is how I
Speaker 4: would react when I see that little stick. Wow, I
Speaker 4: thought you died.
Speaker 3: I'll be honest. I didn't think these lots would take
Speaker 3: you in, did he? Is he like trick at you
Speaker 3: or something?
Speaker 5: Crumb Guy actually is, as as of right now, the
Speaker 5: greatest food scientist in his class.
Speaker 2: Living spot has proven himself not Spud Crunk.
Speaker 1: Oh spun.
Speaker 4: Here too, man, I thought you died as well, And
Speaker 4: SPoD goes, hey, Wedge, what's up?
Speaker 5: Hey?
Speaker 16: Man?
Speaker 1: Whoa.
Speaker 4: Actually, well I could pick Spot up and was like, no,
Speaker 4: my wife is in no wedge, Mirinda is in there.
Speaker 4: I need to save her. Oh fine, well we're gonna
Speaker 4: we're We're attacking grill Master Rack on the right flank,
Speaker 4: and it looks like that sweet Army is doing it
Speaker 4: on the left. That gives you a wide open berth
Speaker 4: straight down the middle to take care of things. Oh
Speaker 4: and one more thing, Spork is dead.
Speaker 17: And oh okay, who was Spok? That's what I was here,
Speaker 17: That's what I was saying. He's one of the other warlords. Kaiser,
Speaker 17: Sierra Racks Bork and oh so that problem is kind
Speaker 17: of took care of itself, all right.
Speaker 1: So wait, wait, wait, wait wait is this the final
Speaker 1: battle because this feels kind of like final battle energy.
Speaker 3: A little bit this.
Speaker 6: Well, we have obviously Carl support, and we have Sierra,
Speaker 6: we have Kaiser's card, and once we take Racks, we'll
Speaker 6: just need Sporks and then we'll all be together.
Speaker 1: It was a friendly alliance.
Speaker 3: Spork is dead, Kyle Junior has taken his card.
Speaker 1: Right, so it's fine.
Speaker 4: Ally, Spork has no troops remaining, most of them blew
Speaker 4: up one of his strongest men was found dead in
Speaker 4: a syrup mote.
Speaker 1: That could have happened. Ah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, by the way, that thing is a hazard,
Speaker 2: you should probably like get rid.
Speaker 4: Of that thing.
Speaker 5: Should have been like a fend or something.
Speaker 2: There should be a lot of protections against that.
Speaker 3: Harry. Harry bo goes, oh, but did it seems to
Speaker 3: have proven useful, has it not?
Speaker 1: Hah?
Speaker 5: Absolutely, someone's died, and now all we need to go
Speaker 5: kill Rack, grab the card from him, get the other
Speaker 5: card from Carl Junior, and then we should be able
Speaker 5: to find the machine with the help of this lady
Speaker 5: whose name has forgotten, and then we can get off
Speaker 5: the planet.
Speaker 2: And Spud gets to be reunited with his wife.
Speaker 3: That's Wedge is going to hand you a fucking telephone, an.
Speaker 2: Actual telephone and rotary telephone.
Speaker 4: Where's a Global bites branded smartphone and hands it to you,
Speaker 4: Rick Plan And so it only works on this planet
Speaker 4: because of the satellites on this planet, of course, And
Speaker 4: he hands it to you Rick Plan and goes, all right, Rick,
Speaker 4: once this is all over, Carl will bring you on
Speaker 4: that here device and he and he will meet you
Speaker 4: and tell your directions to the machine Machine.
Speaker 1: The machine excellent, right cool.
Speaker 3: All right, thank you of course, And you know what
Speaker 3: they say when the chips are down and he puts
Speaker 3: his chip helmets back on, he gets back in his
Speaker 3: truck and he puts down the gear stick. He slams
Speaker 3: down on the pedal and.
Speaker 4: He roars off towards the grill Master racks terrain and
Speaker 4: he's riding through armies.
Speaker 1: I salute him as the sun sets.
Speaker 3: Yeah outside the window with like a fucking gatling gun.
Speaker 1: He's like a.
Speaker 3: Lighting people up and yeah, war is happening.
Speaker 6: Okay, well, while sir boys here, can I say something
Speaker 6: to him before he rides off to join his own army?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yes, so, Harry Bow you.
Speaker 6: You have done a fine job mustering all of these
Speaker 6: these civilians to help fight. But like you said, they're
Speaker 6: not warriors, correct.
Speaker 3: A lot of them are. But they are strong willed
Speaker 3: and they have sweet blood.
Speaker 1: I understand that.
Speaker 6: But we, I think as a group already have enough
Speaker 6: civilian blood in our hands. If just remember that defeating
Speaker 6: Rex Army is not really the goal here. Once we
Speaker 6: kill their leader, they should surrender, So then you must
Speaker 6: be quick then get in there and take care of him.
Speaker 6: We all do just be careful, you know, pull your
Speaker 6: truce back if you need to try and be as
Speaker 6: much of a destruction as we can.
Speaker 3: I'm a knight, not a general, my friend.
Speaker 1: But well, I don't know how your army works, but
Speaker 1: it was.
Speaker 4: It's good to work with you, guys. It's good to
Speaker 4: have allies in this world. And you get the snake
Speaker 4: on it, but it's like, sorry.
Speaker 1: What was that snake?
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a trail.
Speaker 1: The game.
Speaker 2: This is the most incredible game ever. I have never
Speaker 2: played a video game before.
Speaker 3: You have games on your phone, I like.
Speaker 1: Touch it once and it shatters into a million pieces.
Speaker 1: You do. Don't do that?
Speaker 2: No, I know, I don't, but I don't know if
Speaker 2: my rock fingers will be detected by the touch pad.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you have to use a phone gel.
Speaker 2: An ashcr phone glove for.
Speaker 3: This, specificly, fleshy hand glove that goes over your rockie.
Speaker 1: It doesn't have to be fleshed touch section meat would Well,
Speaker 1: you can probably make a meat glove.
Speaker 5: The snake gets longer whenever you eat the little things.
Speaker 5: When you press the buttons to make it turn.
Speaker 2: Off and write, it gets scratched up with me gooied
Speaker 2: up with Navena uses it, I get.
Speaker 1: Do with the destruction. She's gonna helping Snake. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean I get very good, Captain. Yes, I believe
Speaker 1: that the diamonds of the essence we should probably begin
Speaker 1: the assault. Absolutely.
Speaker 5: I also wanted to pass that phone across to both
Speaker 5: Crag and Avina because I believe it might be an
Speaker 5: exclosive device, and I don't entirely trust that what we've
Speaker 5: been given. We have communicators they could have used, so
Speaker 5: they have no idea what.
Speaker 2: You're talking about. That's kind of a little bit paranoid, boss,
Speaker 2: But whatever. By the way, I am playing Snake right now, so.
Speaker 1: Later on I want to have a check of that.
Speaker 5: I thought by giving it to Crag first, you might
Speaker 5: break it and the will blow up in his hand
Speaker 5: and not hurt him, and Ravena might hopefully cover it
Speaker 5: in some kind of goo.
Speaker 3: Are you worried that this small device that this new
Speaker 3: NBC has given you could be a bomb of some kind?
Speaker 5: Absolutely, because that's the entire experiences that we've had with
Speaker 5: small devices being given.
Speaker 3: Understandable. I feel that then pocket.
Speaker 1: No no, no, no, no, no, no, listen.
Speaker 6: If I know one thing about Russ them. He would
Speaker 6: never have a communication device handed to an NPC be
Speaker 6: an explosive.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's just something I would never do.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and I don't know who Rustage is, but I've
Speaker 5: been giving this little specific phone a man in a
Speaker 5: van who then drove off with a mini gun out
Speaker 5: the window. So we're going to keep close eye on
Speaker 5: this and the phone back place.
Speaker 2: Also, I'm not sure about a lot of things, but
Speaker 2: that volcano over there, that's probably where Rack is.
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, makes a good point, you guys.
Speaker 4: All right, venture forth as the armies are being distracted
Speaker 4: by the large ship army, by the large Candy Knight army.
Speaker 1: Okay, are we storming or are we just let leisurely
Speaker 1: walking like we're you know, probably trying and sneak in
Speaker 1: through through the battlements. Well, it's because there's an army
Speaker 1: on the left and an army on the right.
Speaker 4: This kind of there's a little bit of yeah, yeah,
Speaker 4: because like because we also have to keep in mind
Speaker 4: that grow Master Rack has been sending a lot of
Speaker 4: men out right. He's been quite aggressive, So you didn't
Speaker 4: even have that much to begin with at home, and
Speaker 4: now they're being fully distracted by armies. So yes, and
Speaker 4: you're a small squadron, so you kind of go underneath.
Speaker 3: The radar here.
Speaker 4: And you, guys, I guess one of you rides the
Speaker 4: rest of you walk. Yeah, I guess Sigma at the
Speaker 4: at the head.
Speaker 1: I would I know I'm riding. I am at the back. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I'll charge and it's fine. I'll go yeah, all.
Speaker 5: Right, and I'll be jogging alongside Sigma.
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, I got point. Let's just bulldoze through
Speaker 2: this and you work.
Speaker 4: You work your way through the city until eventually you
Speaker 4: get to the slaughter Forge itself, the huge building, its
Speaker 4: mouth opened like a more and it looks like an oven.
Speaker 3: Heat is sort of emanating out of it, and that
Speaker 3: feels like home. Walk inside, and as you walk inside,
Speaker 3: the ground below you starts to move like one massive
Speaker 3: conveyor belt.
Speaker 1: Okay, that that's a little bit less like home.
Speaker 3: And Sierra looks down and goes, fuck I forgot to say,
Speaker 3: and it's start.
Speaker 4: Before you know it, you're sort of being dragged along
Speaker 4: without mercy by this like this massive metal steel track
Speaker 4: until it leads you into this massive chamber that stretches
Speaker 4: open like the more of a colossal furnace below the
Speaker 4: belts that you're on this convey about is this impossibly
Speaker 4: deep pit where the bottom is rivers of lava bubbling
Speaker 4: and spitting out, lighting the entire room in this almost
Speaker 4: hell like orange is almost unbearable. Almost every breath. You're fine,
Speaker 4: You're good, everyone else this is great, okay. Suspended from
Speaker 4: chains from the ceiling and sort of maybe attached to
Speaker 4: the wall are like giant cages full of meat, both
Speaker 4: dead and alive, like animals and also meat. And in
Speaker 4: the heat of everything, they are slowly cooking. Ah, oh God,
Speaker 4: and there's like fat dripping off them and it falls
Speaker 4: down and sizzles in the lava below. And at the
Speaker 4: end of the conveyor belt that you're on, it sort
Speaker 4: of just drops off into the fiery pit. But there
Speaker 4: is more to this room below your belt. God of
Speaker 4: Going the opposite direction is another conveyor belt. There's a
Speaker 4: conveil belt in the sky top right, going across the
Speaker 4: sky and on the other side of the room.
Speaker 3: Who you know, he's looking out a window.
Speaker 4: Right now, but now he turns round is grill master
Speaker 4: rack and in front of him he has a giant
Speaker 4: meat ca and attached to the meat cannon is a
Speaker 4: funnel that goes up to one of the steel cages.
Speaker 4: That's like slowly sucking through that meat and converting it
Speaker 4: to meat balls for the meat cannon. That cage is
Speaker 4: a mixture of animals screaming and people and clinging onto
Speaker 4: the bars. Near the top of that sort of mass,
Speaker 4: Spud goes.
Speaker 1: My wife, Oh my god, she exists.
Speaker 3: Where you thinks he was lying just to get out
Speaker 3: of it. Yeah. Yeah, the world's grill master. Rack turns
Speaker 3: to you and says, oh, hello, you've caught me as
Speaker 3: I was loading my meat cannons. And then he looks
Speaker 3: at Sierra and goes, oh, hello, love, and Sierra goes,
Speaker 3: you not call me that, And I think, I think
Speaker 3: we just roll initiative.
Speaker 1: Oh, this is a battle. This is a battle between Ashcar.
Speaker 1: I denote rock Lock.
Speaker 3: And he grins.
Speaker 1: It's okay. I got this this time. I got this
Speaker 1: guy's last time. I was a little nervous. I got
Speaker 1: this now.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And he grins and he says rock Locker.
Speaker 1: Rock clock Rack, brother of rock. I start laughing too.
Speaker 8: Oh.
Speaker 3: We Ashcar so are obsessed with the rocks that were
Speaker 3: made of We eat rocks, We chew on granite, but
Speaker 3: we never realized the superiority of flame of meat. And
Speaker 3: he rips off a piece of his rocky like body,
Speaker 3: and underneath he has a slab of meat that he's
Speaker 3: sort of attached to himself. You want to challenge me
Speaker 3: to a rock lock. I want to challenge you to
Speaker 3: a food fight.
Speaker 2: You have violated the sacred temple of your body. You
Speaker 2: are no longer ashcar.
Speaker 4: On that moment, as the conveyor belt pulls you towards
Speaker 4: your enemy, we will do.
Speaker 3: A tob continued.
Speaker 2: Ha.
Speaker 4: He ran his fingers along the metal of the helmet,
Speaker 4: gold polished to a saint smile, caught the colored lights
Speaker 4: spilled through the stained glass above, and threw it back
Speaker 4: in soft, gentle hues. Beautiful thing, dangerous too. Most beautiful
Speaker 4: things were across the chambers at the statue of the
Speaker 4: Great Prophet Ellssy, serene as ever, untouchable as ever stone
Speaker 4: fragments hung around her in perfect stillness, like the world
Speaker 4: itself had decided she was worth pausing for. He stared
Speaker 4: up at her and wondered, not for the first time,
Speaker 4: whether she'd ever doubted, whether she'd stood where he stood now,
Speaker 4: Feeling the weight of belief pressing down on him like
Speaker 4: a pistol at the back of his head. When he
Speaker 4: was younger, he swallowed it all without chewing. The great
Speaker 4: flow binds us, The great flow guides us. The great
Speaker 4: flow knows best. He'd felt it, sure enough, like a
Speaker 4: current under the skin, tugging him along. Hard to argue
Speaker 4: with something you could feel in yourselves. But the organizations
Speaker 4: around it, that was another matter. He'd seen the rock
Speaker 4: early smiles, too wide, with hands too quick to take
Speaker 4: sermons that sounded a lot like orders. The floe was
Speaker 4: meant to bind them together, but the conclave wrapped around
Speaker 4: it only seemed interested in drawing lines, this one above,
Speaker 4: this one below, this one pure, and this one less.
Speaker 4: So that all changed, though, when he met the cardinals.
Speaker 4: They had hauled him in for questioning after his friend
Speaker 4: decided to attack a bishop about a year ago. At
Speaker 4: the time, he thought it was fair justice. The bishop
Speaker 4: was an awful man. Still, they dragged him in, sat
Speaker 4: him down, and started talking. There was something about them,
Speaker 4: the way they spoke, calm as the still see, the
Speaker 4: way they looked at him like they already knew the
Speaker 4: man he was supposed to be. It was like a
Speaker 4: fresh tide, rolling in steady and sure, lifting him up
Speaker 4: rather than dragging him under. Their words settled in him,
Speaker 4: warm and certain, as if something that had always been
Speaker 4: there had finally found its voice. By the time he
Speaker 4: left that room, his doubts had been neatly folded away,
Speaker 4: like old clothes that didn't fit any more.
Speaker 3: He'd been a.
Speaker 4: Child, he told himself, blind in all the wrong ways.
Speaker 4: The universe was bigger than his grievances, uglier too. There
Speaker 4: were enemies, they were always enemies. There were velunari that
Speaker 4: turned the back on the floe, spat in its face,
Speaker 4: dangerous people, people who needed dealing with. And it was
Speaker 4: then he thought that maybe he was the man to
Speaker 4: do it. He'd always been good, better than good, top
Speaker 4: of his class, quick hands, quicker reflexes, a pilot who
Speaker 4: could thread an asteroid field, a fighter who didn't hesitate.
Speaker 4: He thought that meant he was destined for something great.
Speaker 4: Turns out he was destined for something greater. The months
Speaker 4: after that were complicated. The cardinals took an interest in him.
Speaker 4: They spoke of purpose, of destiny, of being chosen. There
Speaker 4: was a process, tests, trials, other candidates, of course, but
Speaker 4: the outcome felt decided long before he stepped into the room.
Speaker 4: When they placed that mantle on him, he felt proud, honored.
Speaker 4: He looked back at the helmet in his hands. His
Speaker 4: fingers found the shard set into its crown, a silver
Speaker 4: of something dark in the dark, swallowing the light around
Speaker 4: it wrong. Somehow, like staring into our hole, the galaxy
Speaker 4: forgot to exist. He touched it anyway he always did.
Speaker 4: The feeling came same as ever, cold and deep and endless.
Speaker 4: He pulled the helmet on, sealing himself inside it, and
Speaker 4: turned towards the door. No more doubts now, no more questions.
Speaker 4: The war bishop at work to do