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Speaker 1: I made pay sunny sound. I had a vision like nice.

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Speaker 2: I almost pointed usually I hit record and then I

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point at Lynette to start the show. But then I

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was like, oh, I'm Stott Lynnette. Hi guys, it's me

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Stephanie Wilder Taylor. Welcome to it. For crying out loud,

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I'm back with Julie Gay.

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Speaker 3: Hello, we miss Lynette. Sounds like she's having well. Sounds

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like what am I even talking about? Hopefully she's having

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an awesome time with Wendy. Aunt Wendy. We love our

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aunt Wendy.

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Speaker 2: She texted me that they spent the whole first night

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in their pajamas watching The Golden Bachelor.

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Speaker 1: I love it. This is exactly what Lynette needs.

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Speaker 2: Yes, perfect, I needed some time off. Yes, but you're here.

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We had a whole Tuesday episode.

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Speaker 3: I just told a story on Patreon that was, oh

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my god, it's so funny story.

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Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, I mean it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. But then we teased that we were going to

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tell like a more serious story because you had this

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crazy yes happen, Yes, so crazy. Say that you didn't

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need this, like you already deal with anxiety. How is

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your anxiety?

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Speaker 1: Over all?

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Speaker 3: My anxieties so much better than it was when I

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had really bad anxiety in twenty nineteen into twenty twenty,

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when I all that shit went down with my family.

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I've never had anxiety that but I mean it was

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a full on nervous breakdown. I did all the things, acupuncture, medication, meditation,

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you know, everything, and it's been really good since then.

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So now it was like five years, you know, like

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I feel like, oh, and I know I talked about it,

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but I did EMDR and I think that really was

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the clincher to help me get through all this. Oh

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my god, I am DR is the best. I mean,

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I've been in therapy since my twenties, just over stuff

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and anxiety and I have panic disorder and.

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Speaker 1: Blah blah blah, And that was good.

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Speaker 3: I mean, talk therapy has its place for sure, and

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cognitive behavioral therapy has its place. All these things have

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their place for me. The AMDR by R is what helped.

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Speaker 1: Me the most.

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Speaker 2: Do you like describe what it is?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, so I can't tell you what it stands for.

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Speaker 3: I movement to sensitization and reprogramming something or I think

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I made that up. I don't know, something like that

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but basically, it's just a form of therapy that's been

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tested and it's been researched and they've done trials and

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it has been shown to actually work. It's nothing wo

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wo I mean, it's backed by science. And essentially, you

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go back to your earliest memory of how you felt.

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And in other words, you're going into therapy because you're

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feeling something, whether you're feeling anger, or you're feeling lack

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of control, or you know, whatever the emotion is you're feeling,

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and then the therapist says, Okay, go back to your

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earliest time when you felt that emotion.

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Speaker 1: Okay. For me, it was kind of so many emotions.

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Speaker 3: But let's say it's loss of control, not being able

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to control a situation.

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Speaker 1: So I can remember standing in my.

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Speaker 3: Garage and my mom leaving at five years old and

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me just crying. She's going out to dinner, but me

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just crying and crying and crying, and that was my

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first memory.

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Speaker 1: And then you.

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Speaker 3: Take your hands and in this case, I put them

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on the desk in front of me, palms down, and

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the therapist would say, okay, assign something to it. Okay,

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loss of control, Okay, now you're gonna she's gonna tap

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my hands tap tap, tap, tap tap right left, right, left, right, left,

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So she's tapping my hands, and I myself am processing

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the memory. So I'm thinking about it. I'm crying, I'm

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whatever you're doing. Maybe you're not having any emotions about it,

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but you're thinking about it, and you think about it

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for a couple of minutes, and then she goes, Okay,

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how do you feel now? I still feel angry or

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out of control? Okay, let's keep going tap tap tap,

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tap tap. As you're processing it, processing it. That could

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take a whole session. You know, it could take five minutes.

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It could take an entire session to get through that

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particular thing. Okay, I feel better now. Okay, how do

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you feel now? Let's assign a new emotion to that

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particular situation.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I feel.

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Speaker 3: Like you know. And then she literally gives you a

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paper with a whole list of you know, how you feel,

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and then you choose like, Okay, that is how I

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feel now. I feel more in control, I feel empowered

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whatever the word is. Okay, Now you feel empowered. Okay,

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now let's go back. Okay, now go through that emotion

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feeling empowered. Tap tap, tap tap, tap, tap tap, and

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it's essentially reprogramming every memory you have into you feeling

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a different way about that. Okay, I'm not angry anymore.

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I'm forg you know, I forgive, I feel whatever. The

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adjective is that you want to feel about whatever memory

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you're having. Okay, now, when's the next time you felt?

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Speaker 1: So that was at five.

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Speaker 3: When's the next memory you can remember feeling out of control?

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I remember when I was eight and my step.

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Speaker 1: Mom blah blah blah and blah blah blah. Okay, now

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we go back to tapping.

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Speaker 3: Interestingly, I did that and in twenty nineteen it went

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into twenty twenty and it was COVID, so we couldn't

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meet in person.

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Speaker 1: So she goes, that's okay. So we got on zoom.

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Speaker 3: And I crossed my arms and I put my right

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hand on my left shoulder and my left hand on

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my right shoulder, and she's like, so on zoom. She's like, Okay,

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what you're gonna do is tap yourself. So you're going

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right left, right, left, right, left, and I'm tapping my

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shoulders right left, right, left with my arms crossed in

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front of my chest. Now we're going to go through

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those emotions again, and essentially you're literally going through from

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your first emotion up until your last you know, memory

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of feeling that emotion. So for me, it was literally

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from five until you know, I was forty five at

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the time, going through those emotions. There was one time,

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actually I was leaving for office. I was so worked up.

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She's like, I don't want you to leave, like this,

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are you okay? I'm like no, no, no, I'm fine,

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Like I'm having so many emotions, but these are all great.

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Speaker 1: It's getting out of me, you know. She's like, okay, okay,

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And I don't know, you just slowly work through all

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the shit.

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Speaker 3: You just work through it, and you assign a more

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positive spin on every memory. I don't know if I'm

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describing it the way they describe it in the scientific literature,

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but the way it felt for me was I was

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rep programming every memory to a more positive experience with it,

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like a more positive memory of it. So for me,

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it was a lot of not feeling in control, and

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now I have more control over all those memories. In

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that narrative, I don't know, that's just seems really cool.

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It's really cool, and what I like about it is

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you're working towards something With talk therapy. Although I did

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it and I needed it, there was no closure. It

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was like, well, I could talk about the shit all

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fucking day long, like I need to work through it

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and move on from it. And for some people, talking

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about it is enough. You talk about it, you process

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it with your therapist, you know whatever. They give you

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some tools and you move on. There's nothing wrong with

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any of the different types of therapies.

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Speaker 1: For me, though, there was no.

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Speaker 3: Button on it, like I couldn't close that door with EMDR.

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I was like, Okay, I closed that door, moving on

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to the next one. I closed that door, moving on

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the next one. I'm not saying I'm never going to

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have these emotions again or feelings again, but I don't.

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Speaker 1: Know what it did.

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Speaker 3: It just dulled all of those awful, awful feelings and

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I just don't really think about them anymore.

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Speaker 2: Do you think that your panic disorder, though, always stemmed

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from trauma?

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Speaker 1: So so I was diagnosed.

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Speaker 3: So I started having my first panic attacks when I

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was nineteen. I remember it clear as day. I was driving.

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Actually I had one in high school, but at the

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time I didn't know what it was I was hyperventilating

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in math class and my mom had to come pick

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me up. And then I felt okay the rest of

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the day and that was that. And then three years

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later or whatever, I'm nineteen and I'm driving on the freeway,

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I know, in Calabasis, on the one on one, and

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all of a sudden, I was like, oh my god,

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I'm going to die. I'm going to die right now.

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I'm going to die, like I just I can't even

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describe for people that have had those feelings. It's this

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overwhelming sense of doom. And then I called Kim, who

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was living in Calabas. I'm like, Kim, can I come over.

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I don't know what the hell just happened to me.

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So I go to her house and I'm like, ah,

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that was so scary. So I had had a really

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bad car accident where I was knocked on conscious unconscious

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and the ambulance had to come and I was bleeding

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from my head and all the things. So I thought

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it was PTSD because it had happened like six months prior.

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So I go to a psychiatrist at UCLA. I'm like,

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I think I'm having PTSD because I got this panic

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attack in the car and I had a bad car accident.

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Speaker 1: I think that's what I'm having. And he kind of

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like listen to what I had to say.

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Speaker 3: He's like, I don't know about that. So then actually

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I went back to my friend Kim. I'm like, I

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need a psychia like, I need a different psychiatrist. She's like,

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oh my god. My friend goes to doctor Robert Ross.

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Shout out doctor Robert Ross. He retired a few years ago.

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He saved my life. I fully say that, but anyway,

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I mean not that I was, but I'm just saying

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like he he helped me so much at that time

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when I was so scared.

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Speaker 1: And then so I went to him and I.

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Speaker 3: Explained these, you know, panic attacks I was having and

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I didn't know what they were at the time.

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Speaker 1: He goes, oh, you have panic disorder.

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Speaker 3: He's like, here's the pamphlet and I read through it

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and I was like, yes, yes, this is what I have.

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So he's like, you have panic disorder. So like, where

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does this come from?

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Speaker 1: What is this?

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Speaker 3: He's like, well, we don't really know. And you know,

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is it related to trauma?

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Speaker 1: What is it? Is it all biochemical?

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Speaker 3: And some people are just wired differently, you know all

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the things I think you know, I will always it,

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and it'll lay dormant at times, and it'll rear its

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head at times. I take Paxel. I've been on it

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since my early twenties for panic disorder. I keep XANX

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with me in my purse so if I ever get

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a really bad panic attack. I mean, I don't use

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it like I can get a prescription that'll last me

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five years because I.

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Speaker 1: Don't use it. But knowing I have it, I can

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use it.

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Speaker 3: And actually I used it in the story I'm going

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to tell you because it was so traumatic.

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Speaker 1: I had to take a xanax.

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Speaker 3: I couldn't I couldn't come down anyway. So I keep

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XANX with me, and and if I get panic attacks,

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then then you know, now I have a lot of

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tools on how to prevent me from getting them. I

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do a lot of meditation, not a lot, but I

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do meditation, and you know, ten minutes here and there

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of guided meditation and stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: But I remember, anyway, you know, many years ago, like

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kind of early on in our friendship, because you still

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lived in the Tarzana.

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Speaker 1: Yes, yes, I had a.

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Speaker 2: Panic attack and I wonder if one of the things

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about having a panic attacks you you're you don't know

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you're having a panic attack.

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Speaker 1: That's right.

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Speaker 2: You think something's wrong where you think you're mad about something.

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Then a year later you're like, oh, I was maybe

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just so you called me and you were like, can

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you come over? Something's wrong with me? And I came

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over and you were like, I don't know. I'm like

238
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have like low blood pressure and I'm weak and I

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feel like I'm gonna faint. Yes, my stomach hurts, I'm

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like having diarrhea and I can't like and.

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Speaker 3: The kids were little, and I called nine one one.

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Speaker 1: Did you call nine one one?

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Speaker 2: I called nine one one. I called nine one one. Well,

244
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I was just sitting with you were like, just sit

245
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with me, Just sit with me, and I did, and

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then finally you were like, oh my god, no, something's

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really wrong. Called nine on one. So I called nine

248
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on one and then I called Jamil and I was like,

249
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oh my god, Jamil, like I called the paramedics and

250
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he was like huh. And I was just thinking, like, well,

251
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he's not very like alarmed, you know, for the fact,

252
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like this is serious. I was like yeah, no, no,

253
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but like the paramedics are coming. He goes okay, he

254
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goes that it's totally fine, tell Julie I'm leaving work,

255
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like he but he was just so calm about it.

256
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And then it turned out that like that wasn't the

257
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first time.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I think he might have said she's okay, she's having

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a panic attack probably or something.

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Speaker 2: And I was like, why God, he doesn't know, Like, yeah,

262
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I get it. I think a little bit, you know,

263
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because you were very upset. Then the paramedics came and

264
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then they checked you out and they're like, all your

265
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vitals are okay.

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Speaker 1: Well this is what I remember so well.

267
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Speaker 3: The paramedics came and I go, okay, I have panic disorder,

268
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you guys, I've had panic attacks. This is not a

269
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panic attack. Something is really wrong, right. I think I'm hyperglycemic.

270
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I'm little blood pressure. I mean wow, my blood pressure

271
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was like one forty over ninety, like it was high

272
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in fact, so yeah, I really truly was like no, no, no, no, no,

273
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I'm having And I remember after that, I got a

274
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blood sugar monitor to check my blood trigger every once

275
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in a while because I'm like, no, I'm hypoglycemic, Like

276
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there is I have something physically wrong with me, And

277
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anybody that's had anxiety and knows this is like shaking their.

278
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Speaker 1: Head like yes, exactly.

279
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Speaker 3: You get the million dollar work up and there's nothing there,

280
00:13:07,679 --> 00:13:11,039
but it's all you know in your mind, and it's

281
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all bio you know, biochemical in your head. So yeah,

282
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so you you were, Yeah, so I've And then another

283
00:13:17,679 --> 00:13:19,480
time that happened me in graduate school when I was

284
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in Boston. I had too much caffeine called the ambulance.

285
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So those things have happened. But anyway, I don't even

286
00:13:26,759 --> 00:13:28,519
know how we got into this bit. Emdr has been

287
00:13:28,559 --> 00:13:31,720
really helpful. Oh oh, I do believe my panic attacks.

288
00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:34,639
I could be wrong. I personally think they're related to

289
00:13:34,679 --> 00:13:40,360
my childhood and feeling really unstable in my own home.

290
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You know, my mom and dad divorced. I was living

291
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with my mom. My mom was love her, she loves

292
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me so much, but she definitely liked to have her

293
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social life and went out a lot, and we were

294
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with babysitters a lot. And it's not a traumatic life

295
00:13:55,440 --> 00:13:59,559
in the sense other people have trauma that's like crazy trauma.

296
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This was trauma where I just felt very like unstable,

297
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like there was a lot of instability in my childhood.

298
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I don't want to go into all the details. I

299
00:14:08,879 --> 00:14:12,000
mean there was nothing like crazy. I didn't have anything

300
00:14:12,159 --> 00:14:15,080
personal abuse happened. I mean, nothing like that. But for me,

301
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it was an unstable childhood and I truly feel like

302
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:22,240
that's where it stemmed from. Like I just never felt

303
00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:25,200
secure as a child. I don't know how to describe

304
00:14:25,200 --> 00:14:29,279
it without going into you know, detail whatever. So So

305
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:31,840
it wasn't a traumatic incident that happened. I know, with

306
00:14:31,919 --> 00:14:33,639
an e MDR a lot of times they say, well,

307
00:14:33,639 --> 00:14:36,399
it's usually if there's a traumatic incident, And I was like, well,

308
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I kind of just had this low level of quote

309
00:14:38,679 --> 00:14:40,279
unquote trauma my whole childhood.

310
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Speaker 2: You know what wasn't also at the time that you

311
00:14:42,799 --> 00:14:45,519
went into that treatment you had gone that was that.

312
00:14:45,919 --> 00:14:47,960
Speaker 1: Was really traumatic? Yes, Yes, it.

313
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Speaker 2: Went on after your dad passed and.

314
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Speaker 3: During my during when my dad was alive, all the

315
00:14:54,320 --> 00:14:56,559
what I believed to be elder abuse that he endured

316
00:14:58,159 --> 00:15:00,879
fighting to see him before he died. Yes, that was

317
00:15:00,919 --> 00:15:05,840
sofing traumatic. And then my the lawsuits and then my

318
00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:07,120
sister disowning me.

319
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Speaker 1: Yes, that's exactly right. That's what led to the full break.

320
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Speaker 2: Out because what we figured out, Yeah, because.

321
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Speaker 1: I was like, why is this happening?

322
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:19,200
Speaker 3: And you were like, dude, because maybe you just went

323
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through some really freaking crazy You lost your dad the

324
00:15:22,440 --> 00:15:25,200
same time you were going through lawsuits and my stepmom's

325
00:15:25,240 --> 00:15:28,039
accusing me of, you know, poisoning my dad, and the

326
00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:30,399
you know, and and you know, just all this stuff

327
00:15:30,559 --> 00:15:33,080
was just crazy. So yeah, yeah, yeh yah, yeah exactly.

328
00:15:33,120 --> 00:15:35,960
So that's that's where that came from. But okay, so

329
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:41,399
go now now to what happened. So this happened in March.

330
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Speaker 1: Like March twenty first or something. I have to look

331
00:15:43,840 --> 00:15:45,480
at the calendar. Okay.

332
00:15:45,559 --> 00:15:51,000
Speaker 3: So I'm married to Jamil He back when we were

333
00:15:52,120 --> 00:15:54,279
like I think we were engaged. I was living in

334
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Boston and he was here and I came home and

335
00:15:57,840 --> 00:15:59,919
we went to a bar together. I was, you know whatever,

336
00:16:00,159 --> 00:16:02,519
and we were in our twenties with at the time

337
00:16:02,559 --> 00:16:05,919
his roommate Phil and Roll. We walk up to the

338
00:16:05,919 --> 00:16:09,039
bar where totally hadn't even had a drink or anything,

339
00:16:09,840 --> 00:16:12,639
and he was like, oh, what do you want to order?

340
00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:14,480
And I was like, oh, I'll get a and all

341
00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:16,600
of a sudden, he just drops to the ground and

342
00:16:16,639 --> 00:16:17,600
I was like, what.

343
00:16:17,399 --> 00:16:19,399
Speaker 1: The He just like passed out and I was like

344
00:16:19,519 --> 00:16:21,440
what and Phil's like, oh.

345
00:16:21,360 --> 00:16:23,320
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's done this before. I'm like, what are you

346
00:16:23,559 --> 00:16:25,840
talking about. He's done this before, and nurse there was

347
00:16:25,840 --> 00:16:28,039
like a nurse there. She's like, you know, this was

348
00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:29,600
when I was still in grad school. I didn't know

349
00:16:29,639 --> 00:16:33,000
what the hell was going on anyway. So he gets

350
00:16:33,039 --> 00:16:36,559
vasovagel syncope. For people that do or don't know what

351
00:16:36,600 --> 00:16:39,279
it is, your blood pressure just drops and you Usually

352
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:42,039
there's a precipitating event. I think for him at the time,

353
00:16:42,399 --> 00:16:44,879
he had eaten, he was out all day, well whatever

354
00:16:44,919 --> 00:16:47,320
it was. Usually it's that he never since then, he's

355
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:48,679
never just dropped on me like that.

356
00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:50,679
Speaker 1: But he gets.

357
00:16:50,559 --> 00:16:53,320
Speaker 3: Vasovagel syncope where his blood pressure gets real low and

358
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:57,240
he just kind of faints. So this has happened probably

359
00:16:57,320 --> 00:16:59,559
five or six times in our marriage, and yeah, I

360
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:02,840
know when it's going to happen, because it's usually he's like,

361
00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:06,759
you know, sick to his stomach or you know, he's

362
00:17:06,960 --> 00:17:11,359
like he has Crohn's disease, but it's it's very mild.

363
00:17:11,640 --> 00:17:15,000
But when he gets these flares, it hurts really bad.

364
00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:17,559
And so even just the pain in the belly can

365
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:20,200
cause it. So like I know, like, okay, I gotta

366
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:21,799
go be with him when he's on the toilet because

367
00:17:21,799 --> 00:17:23,839
he may pass out due to pain or due to

368
00:17:24,480 --> 00:17:27,119
just flare ups of that, you know, if he's vomiting

369
00:17:27,240 --> 00:17:31,519
or whatever. So, like I said, when he gets sick

370
00:17:31,839 --> 00:17:33,559
is usually when he's going to go down, if he

371
00:17:33,599 --> 00:17:36,119
has a bad you know, COVID or whatever the case is.

372
00:17:36,839 --> 00:17:39,319
So it's only been about a handful of times that

373
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:42,160
I'm like, okay, he's going down, and I got to like, go, okay, Jamie,

374
00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:44,559
you're going to pass out. You're turning gray. Let's lay

375
00:17:44,599 --> 00:17:47,000
you down and I'll lay him down. So have you

376
00:17:47,079 --> 00:17:53,720
ever yelled Timber, I should just add some levity, Just

377
00:17:53,759 --> 00:17:57,400
add some levity, so I know when he's going to

378
00:17:57,480 --> 00:18:00,160
pass out. Every time, I'm like, here we go, he's

379
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:02,799
not feeling well. I can see it's happening. And then

380
00:18:02,960 --> 00:18:04,680
he passes out and he comes right back and he's

381
00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:07,279
like I'm fine, I'm fine, and it's fine, and he

382
00:18:07,319 --> 00:18:08,000
comes right back too.

383
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:09,720
Speaker 1: We get him into bed, get him some gatorade, and

384
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:10,200
he's fine.

385
00:18:10,839 --> 00:18:14,920
Speaker 3: Like literally, there's never been anything worse than that, Like

386
00:18:15,319 --> 00:18:18,119
quick pass out. I'm feeling fine. Let's get some gateorad

387
00:18:18,160 --> 00:18:18,400
in you.

388
00:18:18,400 --> 00:18:20,200
Speaker 1: You're fine. He's never had to go to the hospital

389
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:21,359
because of it or anything like that.

390
00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:28,000
Speaker 3: So he had had an extremely busy week at work

391
00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:31,079
and he was on call and just not sleeping that well.

392
00:18:31,119 --> 00:18:32,519
Speaker 1: And on top of it, he was sick.

393
00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:36,599
Speaker 3: He had like an upper respitory infection, cold symptoms, like.

394
00:18:36,599 --> 00:18:39,720
Speaker 1: You know, body aches. But he does.

395
00:18:39,559 --> 00:18:41,839
Speaker 3: Procedures on patience, so it's very hard for him to

396
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,359
just be like, I'm not coming in today, Like he's

397
00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:46,640
kind of he has to go into work, especially when

398
00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:48,880
he's on call. Like he doesn't have a choice. I

399
00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:50,920
had said to him, though, get someone to cover. He's

400
00:18:50,920 --> 00:18:54,839
the only one that does those procedures besides his coworker.

401
00:18:55,799 --> 00:18:57,960
But his coworker was busy, and he's like, I just

402
00:18:58,000 --> 00:18:59,960
have to go in. So the point is he had

403
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:04,359
very busy week on top of being sick. So comes Friday,

404
00:19:05,119 --> 00:19:08,359
finish his work, he's off call. It's like, you know,

405
00:19:08,720 --> 00:19:11,400
we're just hanging out. At like six pm. We took Chloe,

406
00:19:11,640 --> 00:19:14,279
our dog, for a walk, but I could tell he

407
00:19:14,319 --> 00:19:17,000
was just tired, you know, and I'm like, dude, let's

408
00:19:17,039 --> 00:19:18,279
go eat, let's go get sushi.

409
00:19:18,279 --> 00:19:19,880
Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, that's a great idea, let's do that.

410
00:19:19,960 --> 00:19:22,880
So took Chloe for a walk and we go to

411
00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:23,599
get sushi.

412
00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:28,200
Speaker 3: And meanwhile, he hadn't had much to drink in terms

413
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:30,839
of water. He wasn't hydrating properly and take care of

414
00:19:30,920 --> 00:19:34,079
himself that week. Now we know that when he's feeling

415
00:19:34,079 --> 00:19:36,480
that way, he's got to really hydrate. He's got to eat,

416
00:19:36,599 --> 00:19:38,279
he's got to take care of himself, he's got to

417
00:19:38,279 --> 00:19:42,039
get sleep. But at the time he's like, whatever, I'll

418
00:19:42,119 --> 00:19:44,160
just go We're gonna go eat, so I'll just get

419
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:46,319
food when we get there. Okay, we go to the

420
00:19:46,319 --> 00:19:49,240
sushi restaurant down the street from our house. We're sitting

421
00:19:49,279 --> 00:19:52,720
there waiting to be seated. There was a line, so

422
00:19:52,799 --> 00:19:56,799
we're in the waiting area and there's a good probably

423
00:19:56,920 --> 00:19:59,880
like twelve people in the waiting area.

424
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,559
Speaker 1: But then the sushi bar kind of extended into the

425
00:20:02,599 --> 00:20:04,440
waiting area and the sushi bar was full.

426
00:20:04,839 --> 00:20:06,759
Speaker 3: So you've got about like ten people, let's say, in

427
00:20:06,799 --> 00:20:09,079
the waiting area, families and such, and then you got

428
00:20:09,119 --> 00:20:12,839
people sitting at the sushi bar. So we're at a

429
00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:16,640
We're on a bench that like lines the wall going

430
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:20,640
to the outside, like it's like windows. So we're sitting,

431
00:20:21,039 --> 00:20:23,279
you know, facing I'm not facing him because we're sitting

432
00:20:23,279 --> 00:20:26,480
on a bench facing out. And Bella had just called

433
00:20:26,559 --> 00:20:29,599
and she's like, oh, I'm driving home from Laguna Beach

434
00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:32,279
with my friends. We're like, okay, Bells, love you. We're

435
00:20:32,319 --> 00:20:35,799
talking or nothing. Nothing happened, nothing, And then we just

436
00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:38,559
looked down on our phones and all of a sudden,

437
00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:42,920
he slumps over onto my right shoulder, and I was like,

438
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:46,000
what did he just pass out? Like, like I said,

439
00:20:46,039 --> 00:20:47,880
I always know when he's going to pass out, he's

440
00:20:47,960 --> 00:20:50,799
usually sick. Yes, he was sick, but it wasn't like

441
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:52,720
I'm sick, I'm vomiting sick.

442
00:20:52,759 --> 00:20:54,480
Speaker 1: It was just like I have a cold kind of thing.

443
00:20:55,359 --> 00:20:58,240
Speaker 3: So I was like, what the fuck. So I look

444
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:03,799
and he's not ashen. He's not a little gray. He

445
00:21:03,960 --> 00:21:09,079
is white, ghost white. There was zero blood to his brain, nothing,

446
00:21:09,559 --> 00:21:11,839
And I was like, oh shit. So I lay him

447
00:21:11,839 --> 00:21:14,200
on the bench because there was nowhere else to go,

448
00:21:14,279 --> 00:21:16,599
and he's not light. I couldn't just lay him on

449
00:21:16,640 --> 00:21:18,079
the floor. I could not just take him off the

450
00:21:18,119 --> 00:21:20,599
bench casually. I was like, oh shit. So I lay

451
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:22,920
him down and I look at him, I'm like, oh

452
00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:26,599
my god, he's he's not breathing. Oh my god, he

453
00:21:26,680 --> 00:21:29,079
is white and he's not breathing. I was like, oh shit,

454
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:32,160
So I'm like call nine one one. I just yell

455
00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:34,240
call nine one one. There were so many people around.

456
00:21:35,559 --> 00:21:38,480
I feel for his carotid pulse. There was no pulse,

457
00:21:38,599 --> 00:21:40,359
and I was like, oh my fucking god, Oh my god.

458
00:21:40,359 --> 00:21:42,599
So I just start doing CPR. That's what I know

459
00:21:42,720 --> 00:21:44,480
to do. I just start doing CPR.

460
00:21:45,799 --> 00:21:49,319
Speaker 1: The crazy thing was I'm doing CPR. Nobody in the restaurant.

461
00:21:49,880 --> 00:21:51,960
Speaker 3: I mean someone called nine on one, of course, and

462
00:21:52,039 --> 00:21:55,079
I think people were like staring, but nobody helped me.

463
00:21:55,240 --> 00:21:57,200
Nobody was like, oh my god, let's get him on

464
00:21:57,240 --> 00:21:59,119
the ground, because you know, when you do CPR you

465
00:21:59,160 --> 00:22:01,799
need the person to be on then. But I he

466
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,920
was like essentially for all intents and purposes dead, Like

467
00:22:04,960 --> 00:22:06,559
I could not just drag him to the ground. I

468
00:22:06,559 --> 00:22:08,319
would have hit his head, like I couldn't do it

469
00:22:08,359 --> 00:22:11,200
on my own. And there was nobody that was like, oh,

470
00:22:11,480 --> 00:22:15,000
I'll do the chest compressions, you do the breathing, you know, right.

471
00:22:15,119 --> 00:22:17,400
There was no nobody there to help me or to

472
00:22:17,440 --> 00:22:19,319
say are you, okay, well, can I do you know

473
00:22:19,640 --> 00:22:21,039
someone I hear in the back going.

474
00:22:21,599 --> 00:22:23,799
Speaker 1: I called nine one one ambulance is on the way.

475
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:26,359
Speaker 3: So I'm like, okay, nobody from that worked at the restaurant.

476
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:28,400
Was like came in nobody, and I was like.

477
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:31,119
Speaker 2: And in your minder you like I got two minutes tops.

478
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:34,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm just I wasn't even thinking that. I was

479
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:38,160
just thinking, just keep the compressions going. One thing I

480
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:41,000
do know that it can help. You know, like doing

481
00:22:41,039 --> 00:22:44,039
out of hospital CPR can work if you just keep

482
00:22:44,079 --> 00:22:46,160
the compressions going. You don't have to do the breathing.

483
00:22:46,200 --> 00:22:48,440
If you're one person, you don't have to do the breathing.

484
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,000
You can just do the compressions until somebody arrives. But

485
00:22:52,119 --> 00:22:55,039
I was like, okay, I'll do thirty compressions and try

486
00:22:55,039 --> 00:22:56,960
and do two breaths, like this is what I was

487
00:22:57,000 --> 00:22:59,920
thinking in my mind. But you can just do compressions

488
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:01,920
and that can work too.

489
00:23:02,079 --> 00:23:04,799
Speaker 1: So I was like, just fucking keep compressing.

490
00:23:04,839 --> 00:23:07,319
Speaker 3: So the heart the blood is circulating, So the blood

491
00:23:07,359 --> 00:23:08,880
is so that's all I was caring about, is the

492
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:12,839
blood needed to be circulating. So I'm doing compressions, doing compressions,

493
00:23:12,839 --> 00:23:15,119
doing compression to depressions, and I was like, oh my god,

494
00:23:15,279 --> 00:23:19,000
oh my god, he's white, he's not breathing, he's not nothing. Usually,

495
00:23:19,079 --> 00:23:22,160
like I said, he passes out and within five seconds

496
00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:23,319
his eyes are back open.

497
00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:26,440
Speaker 1: And he's like, honey, I'm fine, I'm fine. So then finally,

498
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:30,519
all of a sudden, he went from ghost white, literally

499
00:23:31,039 --> 00:23:35,119
ghost white, to just red like he just perfused. I

500
00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:37,480
was like, oh my fuck, oh my god, oh my god. Okay,

501
00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:38,160
oh my god.

502
00:23:38,279 --> 00:23:41,000
Speaker 3: And then this woman out of nowhere, this angel out

503
00:23:41,039 --> 00:23:43,799
of nowhere, comes running. I think she must must have

504
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:45,880
just paid her bill and was walking towards the front

505
00:23:45,880 --> 00:23:46,480
of the restaurant.

506
00:23:47,240 --> 00:23:49,720
Speaker 1: She's like, get him on the ground, get him on

507
00:23:49,759 --> 00:23:52,279
the ground. And I just yelled then fucking help me,

508
00:23:52,839 --> 00:23:54,160
because I was so like.

509
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:56,960
Speaker 3: Nobody's fucking helping. I did just that's just what came out.

510
00:23:57,240 --> 00:23:59,480
So we both get him to the ground and he

511
00:23:59,559 --> 00:24:03,119
starts coming to and I was like, oh my god,

512
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:06,279
I'm like, you're crying, no god, no, you know, this

513
00:24:06,440 --> 00:24:10,839
is urine. Just I wasn't even in panicked at that time.

514
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:13,079
I was just like, we gotta fucking save this guy.

515
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:15,759
That's all I was thinking, like, there was no there

516
00:24:15,799 --> 00:24:18,920
was no time for emotion at that point. That came though,

517
00:24:19,480 --> 00:24:21,319
but not at the moment. At the moment, I was

518
00:24:21,359 --> 00:24:23,000
just like, I need to keep my husband alive. I

519
00:24:23,039 --> 00:24:25,519
need the ambulance to get here. So he comes to

520
00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:28,039
and he looks at me and he goes, I'm fine

521
00:24:28,039 --> 00:24:30,359
on you, I'm fine, because he thinks he just had

522
00:24:30,359 --> 00:24:32,799
to pass that moment. I go, you're not fucking fine.

523
00:24:32,799 --> 00:24:36,640
You just went pulseless, and he just looked at me,

524
00:24:37,200 --> 00:24:40,279
and then the woman was like and then he goes,

525
00:24:40,319 --> 00:24:42,480
I don't feel good. I'm feeling nauseous. And the woman's like,

526
00:24:42,559 --> 00:24:44,559
turn him on his side, turn him on his side,

527
00:24:44,640 --> 00:24:45,960
and I was like, of course I know to do

528
00:24:46,000 --> 00:24:48,279
that too, So we turn him on his side so

529
00:24:48,319 --> 00:24:50,920
that he doesn't swallow his own vomit. And god, he

530
00:24:51,039 --> 00:24:54,039
didn't vomit, but it was very close to that. Then

531
00:24:54,079 --> 00:24:57,440
he was Okay, the ambulance comes, explain what's going on?

532
00:24:59,559 --> 00:25:01,599
Oh my yeah, that just even talking about it is

533
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:03,039
so crazy.

534
00:25:03,279 --> 00:25:06,240
Speaker 2: I have chills, and I of course know the story.

535
00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:09,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, exactly. Stephanie was the first person I called

536
00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:10,200
spoiler alert.

537
00:25:11,920 --> 00:25:15,039
Speaker 3: Okay, So then the woman was like, I'm like okay, honey,

538
00:25:15,359 --> 00:25:17,240
you're gonna be okay. The ambulance is coming. And then

539
00:25:17,279 --> 00:25:19,640
the ambulance came and he's like I'm fine. I'm like,

540
00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:22,039
you're not fine. And then he really understood the gravity

541
00:25:22,079 --> 00:25:24,599
situation and he didn't feel fine at that point.

542
00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:27,000
Speaker 1: He was like, wait, no, I don't feel that good.

543
00:25:28,160 --> 00:25:31,640
Speaker 3: So they get him into the ambulance. The woman and

544
00:25:32,079 --> 00:25:34,480
she's so I walk over to the ambulance with him.

545
00:25:34,519 --> 00:25:37,799
Of course, we get him into the ambulance and then

546
00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:40,319
they're like, do you want to ride with us? I'm like, well,

547
00:25:40,319 --> 00:25:42,559
I have my car, Like, let me just take my car. Like,

548
00:25:42,680 --> 00:25:44,480
I don't know what I was doing. I probably should

549
00:25:44,519 --> 00:25:45,480
have just ridden with them.

550
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:47,319
Speaker 1: But so then it's just.

551
00:25:47,400 --> 00:25:49,599
Speaker 3: Me walking to my car. My car happened to be

552
00:25:49,759 --> 00:25:52,079
parked right in front of the restaurant, and the front

553
00:25:52,079 --> 00:25:55,680
of the restaurant's all glass, so everybody that was watching

554
00:25:55,960 --> 00:25:58,880
could see me walking to my car by myself. Nobody

555
00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:01,000
that worked in the restaurant came out to be like,

556
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:01,680
are you okay?

557
00:26:01,759 --> 00:26:03,359
Speaker 2: Do you need something? Still want your table?

558
00:26:06,359 --> 00:26:08,000
Speaker 1: Julie Julie for two?

559
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:13,799
Speaker 3: I'm like okay, yeah, up here, just me, Yeah, is.

560
00:26:13,759 --> 00:26:17,720
Speaker 1: There a seat at the bar. I just need one boy,

561
00:26:17,799 --> 00:26:20,000
my hungry. I worked up quite an apatite. Hi guys.

562
00:26:21,160 --> 00:26:25,279
Speaker 3: Dike Coke though like yeah. But the woman who had

563
00:26:25,279 --> 00:26:27,279
helped me came out and she's like, are you okay?

564
00:26:27,279 --> 00:26:29,200
She was so amazing and so wonderful.

565
00:26:30,279 --> 00:26:32,319
Speaker 1: And turns out she works with.

566
00:26:34,079 --> 00:26:37,440
Speaker 3: Children that special needs children, and she says this often

567
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:39,480
happens with them because they have a lot of dual diet,

568
00:26:39,559 --> 00:26:41,599
you know, a lot of diagnoses going on besides being

569
00:26:41,640 --> 00:26:44,000
special needs. Sometimes they have heard issues and this and that.

570
00:26:44,519 --> 00:26:46,839
She's like, I'm like, you're amazing, Thank you so much.

571
00:26:47,039 --> 00:26:48,559
I wish I, you know, would have said can I

572
00:26:48,599 --> 00:26:49,000
have your name?

573
00:26:49,079 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 1: Your number?

574
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:51,319
Speaker 3: I would have sent her something, of course, or just

575
00:26:51,400 --> 00:26:54,319
like wrote her a really nice note. She was amazing

576
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:56,319
and she gave me a hug. Thank God for her.

577
00:26:57,119 --> 00:26:59,519
Then I get in my car and that's when I

578
00:26:59,559 --> 00:27:01,039
called you and I was just like, oh my god,

579
00:27:01,039 --> 00:27:02,960
SEVENI oh my got Sevenie, Oh my god, Sephanie. And

580
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:04,880
I was like telling you, and I was shaking so

581
00:27:05,039 --> 00:27:08,759
much uncontrollably. That that's when I took like half a

582
00:27:08,839 --> 00:27:10,480
xan x point two five as xanax.

583
00:27:10,559 --> 00:27:11,839
Speaker 2: I would have gone for a hole.

584
00:27:13,319 --> 00:27:15,039
Speaker 3: I you know, I get so I hate those I

585
00:27:15,039 --> 00:27:16,240
hate that stuff, but I take.

586
00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:18,599
Speaker 1: It when I need to. I don't even know how

587
00:27:18,640 --> 00:27:19,119
I drove.

588
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:21,640
Speaker 3: I did go through a red light on purpose because

589
00:27:21,640 --> 00:27:24,599
I was very close to Tarzana Hospital.

590
00:27:24,519 --> 00:27:28,920
Speaker 2: I know, and in retrospect, you were very sure that

591
00:27:28,960 --> 00:27:30,880
you did not want me to come to the hospital,

592
00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:32,680
because I was like, I will come and meet you

593
00:27:32,799 --> 00:27:35,640
right yeah, literally down the street, and you were like, no, no, no,

594
00:27:35,720 --> 00:27:37,440
I don't even know how long he'll be there, Like

595
00:27:37,480 --> 00:27:38,759
it's totally fine.

596
00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:41,960
Speaker 3: Because he was like awake and alive, although apparently in

597
00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:46,640
the ambulance his blood pressure like tanked and they had

598
00:27:46,640 --> 00:27:47,920
to start ivy fluids and stuff.

599
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:48,440
Speaker 2: But oh.

600
00:27:50,279 --> 00:27:52,359
Speaker 3: My god, so so yeah, So I think I was

601
00:27:52,359 --> 00:27:53,440
on the phone with you when I said I just

602
00:27:53,480 --> 00:27:55,519
ran through a red light, I think because literally it

603
00:27:55,559 --> 00:27:57,440
was red and I didn't see anybody, and I'm like,

604
00:27:57,440 --> 00:27:59,599
fuck this, I need to get to the hospital. So

605
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:02,279
then I get to the emergency room and they let

606
00:28:02,319 --> 00:28:06,319
me in and he's there in the bed and he's okay.

607
00:28:06,559 --> 00:28:08,599
Speaker 1: Oh my god. It was it was crazy.

608
00:28:08,640 --> 00:28:11,359
Speaker 3: But then they they they you know, did all the

609
00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:13,759
testing they needed to do and this and that. We

610
00:28:13,799 --> 00:28:16,519
stayed there for most of the night and then then

611
00:28:16,559 --> 00:28:20,519
we went home, and I was so scared to let

612
00:28:20,599 --> 00:28:24,079
him do anything without me there, like anytime he went

613
00:28:24,119 --> 00:28:26,160
to the bathroom. Obviously, then we were like, okay, well

614
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:29,799
something's not right. You just like died in front of me,

615
00:28:29,880 --> 00:28:31,640
so like, something's not right. We need to get you

616
00:28:31,720 --> 00:28:35,319
checked out. Obviously, he's a cardiologist, so he called his

617
00:28:35,759 --> 00:28:37,559
coworker and he's like, dude.

618
00:28:38,240 --> 00:28:40,160
Speaker 1: So long story short.

619
00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:44,720
Speaker 3: They do genetic testing and he has something called Brugottas syndrome,

620
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:51,960
which is a genetic condition that predisposes you too vasovagel

621
00:28:52,000 --> 00:28:54,480
syncopee and sudden death.

622
00:28:55,559 --> 00:28:57,519
Speaker 1: So that's what happened.

623
00:28:57,519 --> 00:29:01,240
Speaker 3: I mean, he literally is the textbook Brugattas where he

624
00:29:01,359 --> 00:29:05,200
had growing up. Even like as a twelve year old,

625
00:29:05,240 --> 00:29:07,279
he passed out when he was not feeling well and

626
00:29:07,319 --> 00:29:09,920
he chipped his tooth. He lost his front tooth on

627
00:29:09,960 --> 00:29:13,720
the toilet seat. So even back then, but again it

628
00:29:13,839 --> 00:29:17,680
was like when you're sick, you're just more predisposed to

629
00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:19,920
that you pass out a little bit. This happened to

630
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:23,519
his dad, who's not alive anymore, God rest his soul.

631
00:29:25,079 --> 00:29:27,559
When he would get sick, he would get weak like that,

632
00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:29,920
and it's happened to his brother a couple times and

633
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:31,119
his sister once or twice.

634
00:29:31,599 --> 00:29:33,240
Speaker 1: So we're like, oh, it runs in the family.

635
00:29:33,279 --> 00:29:36,079
Speaker 3: They just you know, their blood pressure tanks and we

636
00:29:36,480 --> 00:29:39,240
no big deal, it's nothing dangerous. It's just you know,

637
00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,480
you have to make sure that you know you're around

638
00:29:41,519 --> 00:29:46,400
when they get sick. So then it was like, okay,

639
00:29:46,759 --> 00:29:49,680
you have brugattas, so it can lead to vasa veagel

640
00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:53,200
syncopee and sudden death. Well that's exactly basically what happened

641
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:56,960
with him. And so now he has a pacemaker and

642
00:29:57,000 --> 00:29:58,000
he has a defibrillator.

643
00:29:58,039 --> 00:29:58,759
Speaker 1: They put that in.

644
00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:02,200
Speaker 3: He talked to read different experts from across one this

645
00:30:02,559 --> 00:30:08,400
Israeli expert, one from Canada, and one from Vanderbilt, and

646
00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:10,599
he talked to all three of them to discuss these

647
00:30:10,599 --> 00:30:13,880
are bugata experts. It's so rare that like, yes, you

648
00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:17,039
learn about it in med school. Cardiologists know about brugatas,

649
00:30:17,039 --> 00:30:20,839
but they don't the cardiologists at his hospital didn't have

650
00:30:21,039 --> 00:30:22,880
like a ton of experience with it because it's just

651
00:30:22,920 --> 00:30:23,799
not that common.

652
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:24,960
Speaker 1: So he wanted to.

653
00:30:24,880 --> 00:30:27,759
Speaker 3: Talk to people, to experts that see this a lot

654
00:30:28,319 --> 00:30:30,960
and they're all like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you need

655
00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:32,359
a pacemaker like yesterday.

656
00:30:33,079 --> 00:30:37,559
Speaker 2: So how does that work? Like with a defibrillator in there,

657
00:30:37,960 --> 00:30:40,000
do you like press a button and it or no?

658
00:30:40,359 --> 00:30:42,640
It said no, it senses okay, yeah.

659
00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:46,000
Speaker 3: So what the pacemaker does is it prevents his heart

660
00:30:46,079 --> 00:30:49,920
from just stopping like that. What the defibrillator does is

661
00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:54,119
if he goes into a deadly arrhythmia, it'll shock him

662
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:58,359
out of that arrhythmia. So ideally he'll never need to

663
00:30:58,400 --> 00:31:04,200
be defibrillated because he doesn't have a predisposition to fatal arrhythmias.

664
00:31:04,319 --> 00:31:06,559
But he has a predisposition to sudden death where his

665
00:31:06,599 --> 00:31:09,000
heart just stops. So that's where the pacemaker comes in.

666
00:31:09,799 --> 00:31:13,720
So so now he's he's paced, so his heart rate

667
00:31:13,759 --> 00:31:17,519
will never go below sixty beats per minute, which will

668
00:31:17,559 --> 00:31:20,680
then in turn keep his blood pressure up, which will

669
00:31:20,720 --> 00:31:24,839
then in turn hopefully prevent him from passing out and

670
00:31:24,920 --> 00:31:27,599
so on and so forth. So we had the kids tested.

671
00:31:27,920 --> 00:31:30,519
Actually we had Bella tested. We need to get Sophie tested.

672
00:31:31,079 --> 00:31:37,240
Bella was negative. Interestingly though, his grandfather died at fifty.

673
00:31:37,720 --> 00:31:38,920
Speaker 1: Yeah just drop dead.

674
00:31:39,759 --> 00:31:42,599
Speaker 3: And back then, you know, they didn't check. They didn't

675
00:31:42,640 --> 00:31:44,680
do autopsies. They just assumed, no, we had a heart attack,

676
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:49,359
probably from brugattas. So this is his dad's dad. So

677
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:51,720
his dad, being the oldest, had to basically work and

678
00:31:51,839 --> 00:31:54,200
raise the family at such a young age because his

679
00:31:54,279 --> 00:31:58,359
dad died at fifty and Jamiel, by the way, was fit.

680
00:31:58,400 --> 00:31:59,960
He just turned fifty one. But it was fifty one.

681
00:32:00,079 --> 00:32:01,720
Speaker 1: It happened. Isn't that crazy?

682
00:32:02,119 --> 00:32:02,519
Speaker 2: Wow?

683
00:32:02,640 --> 00:32:02,880
Speaker 3: I know?

684
00:32:03,440 --> 00:32:06,799
Speaker 1: So yeah, so that happened.

685
00:32:06,799 --> 00:32:09,160
Speaker 3: And you know, he was actually just recently on a

686
00:32:09,200 --> 00:32:12,400
trip to Chicago for work and he got real woozy

687
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:13,400
at the dinner table.

688
00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:16,960
Speaker 1: But he's like, I got my pacemaker. I'm good. He

689
00:32:17,119 --> 00:32:18,319
drank water, he's fine.

690
00:32:18,319 --> 00:32:21,640
Speaker 3: So now he really hydrates a ton and just you know,

691
00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:24,240
I mean, now he's okay because he's his pacemaker, and

692
00:32:24,279 --> 00:32:27,440
now I can sleep at night. But between the incident

693
00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:30,720
and the time he got his pacemaker was like three weeks.

694
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:34,240
And dude, literally, if he was in the bathroom for

695
00:32:34,279 --> 00:32:36,559
more than like two minutes, I'm like, dude, are you okay.

696
00:32:36,640 --> 00:32:38,319
Speaker 1: I'm like texting him, I'm like, what you do. He's like, honey,

697
00:32:38,319 --> 00:32:39,240
I'm fine, I'm fine.

698
00:32:39,359 --> 00:32:41,440
Speaker 3: I wouldn't let him travel. I wouldn't let him like

699
00:32:41,559 --> 00:32:43,440
do anything without me there. I mean, he would go

700
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:45,519
to work, but work is the safest place you can be.

701
00:32:45,599 --> 00:32:47,480
So I was like, fine, you're at the hospital all day,

702
00:32:47,799 --> 00:32:50,000
that's great. If anything happens, you're gonna be fine there.

703
00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:52,599
Speaker 1: But at home, I was so scared. I couldn't sleep.

704
00:32:52,759 --> 00:32:56,000
I was just like it was awful. Oh, because with Brugattas.

705
00:32:57,359 --> 00:33:00,960
Speaker 3: The crazy thing is is most incidents sudden death happen

706
00:33:01,000 --> 00:33:04,440
when you're sleeping. It's actually when your body is at

707
00:33:04,559 --> 00:33:07,799
most rest. Is when the heart rate slows so much,

708
00:33:07,839 --> 00:33:10,000
the blood pressure comes down so much that it just stops.

709
00:33:10,640 --> 00:33:12,799
So most of it happens when you're sleeping.

710
00:33:13,119 --> 00:33:15,799
Speaker 1: It's crazy. It's crazy, it's crazy. It's crazy.

711
00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:18,200
Speaker 3: So that's why I had such trouble sleeping because I

712
00:33:18,200 --> 00:33:19,960
was like, are you breathing? Like are you really okay?

713
00:33:20,359 --> 00:33:22,359
And then you got a spacemaker. I'm like, we're good,

714
00:33:22,559 --> 00:33:27,000
we're good, we're good. So, yes, that's what happened. And

715
00:33:27,039 --> 00:33:27,960
then crazy.

716
00:33:27,720 --> 00:33:29,880
Speaker 2: Story, how many times have you had to take xanax

717
00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:32,799
between that happening and now?

718
00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:34,200
Speaker 1: None?

719
00:33:34,400 --> 00:33:34,720
Speaker 2: Really?

720
00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:35,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't take it.

721
00:33:35,960 --> 00:33:39,680
Speaker 3: I'm telling you, I get I don't take it because Stephanie,

722
00:33:39,720 --> 00:33:43,079
your your attic brain is like you grow, but you

723
00:33:43,119 --> 00:33:46,000
have it though I don't need it and I don't

724
00:33:46,079 --> 00:33:48,319
want it, Okay, I don't like it.

725
00:33:48,480 --> 00:33:49,400
Speaker 1: I only take it.

726
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:52,119
Speaker 3: I mean, I love it when I need it, because

727
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:54,880
when I'm having when I'm in a full blown panic attack,

728
00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:59,319
it no amount of meditation and breathing is bringing me down.

729
00:33:59,480 --> 00:34:01,880
It's scary, Like it's scary. My body starts shaking, I

730
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:04,960
get physical symptoms, you know. So that's when I needed

731
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:07,880
The last time I took it prior to that was

732
00:34:08,519 --> 00:34:11,079
a few years when I went to Singapore visit my brother.

733
00:34:11,159 --> 00:34:14,360
My brother was going through a really hard time, a

734
00:34:14,480 --> 00:34:15,920
very hard time, and I had to get on a

735
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:20,280
flight emergently to get out to Singapore by myself, and

736
00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:24,480
I was just I was, you know, when your family's

737
00:34:24,519 --> 00:34:26,599
going through a hard time, it's very scary, and I

738
00:34:26,599 --> 00:34:28,239
think I was just so I was by myself.

739
00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:29,039
Speaker 1: I was so nervous.

740
00:34:29,079 --> 00:34:30,719
Speaker 3: I think at that I took a Xanax on my

741
00:34:30,800 --> 00:34:33,360
way to Singapore on the flight just to like calm

742
00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:35,119
me down. Once I got there as fine, and I

743
00:34:35,119 --> 00:34:37,440
didn't need one coming home because at that point my

744
00:34:37,480 --> 00:34:38,840
brother was was okay.

745
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:44,039
Speaker 2: But yeah. Yeah, Well let's let's do a little ad

746
00:34:45,119 --> 00:34:50,039
or and I'm gonna find it really quick. Oh for hers, Okay,

747
00:34:50,239 --> 00:34:54,639
for hers, Listen, I almost don't need to the paper

748
00:34:54,679 --> 00:34:57,559
for this. We all want to get on the GLP ones.

749
00:34:58,679 --> 00:35:01,119
Speaker 1: Everybody's like doing this micro dosing, right.

750
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:06,119
Speaker 2: The micro dosing. Look, it's apparently it's great for you, you know,

751
00:35:06,239 --> 00:35:08,079
even if you don't have a ton of weight to lose,

752
00:35:08,559 --> 00:35:11,920
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753
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:15,559
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754
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755
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Actual price depends on product and fun purchase. It should

773
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be an auctioneer. That was so good. That was seamless, girl,

774
00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:30,840
That was seamless. Yeah, I was just thinking about like

775
00:36:31,360 --> 00:36:34,199
a stressful thing that happened. I've talked about it on

776
00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:36,320
the show before. But the time that I told you

777
00:36:36,360 --> 00:36:40,599
that John, yes, that I thought he was going to die. Yes,

778
00:36:41,719 --> 00:36:44,159
which if if Lynette was here, I thought I was

779
00:36:44,199 --> 00:36:49,039
gonna die, he would do her Rosanna Rosanna, And but yeah,

780
00:36:49,079 --> 00:36:51,519
he had it turned out he had food poisoning. But

781
00:36:51,559 --> 00:36:53,400
I didn't know what was wrong with him, and he

782
00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:56,880
was just not feeling well and he was in the

783
00:36:56,920 --> 00:37:01,000
bathroom for like so long and then he fell on

784
00:37:01,039 --> 00:37:03,760
the floor and then he told me to call nine

785
00:37:03,840 --> 00:37:08,280
one one then and then I opened the door. Oh

786
00:37:08,320 --> 00:37:10,800
and he was telling me he might need some aspirin.

787
00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:12,320
He didn't know if he had a heart attack or

788
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:17,280
a stroke or what was wrong. And then he told me, like,

789
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:21,199
if he doesn't make it, Alb that he loves me,

790
00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:24,480
and tell Albe he loves he loves her. Not the

791
00:37:24,519 --> 00:37:27,199
other kids. No, they weren't a lot. They weren't born yet.

792
00:37:27,440 --> 00:37:28,880
Albie was six months old.

793
00:37:29,039 --> 00:37:30,360
Speaker 1: Oh, Stephanie hadn't.

794
00:37:30,119 --> 00:37:33,920
Speaker 2: Met you yet, because I met you like a good

795
00:37:34,039 --> 00:37:37,519
year later. Yeah, but she was in her crib and

796
00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:40,480
we had had a tough night with her, you know,

797
00:37:40,679 --> 00:37:45,159
crying and like she was not great great, the greatest sleeper,

798
00:37:45,199 --> 00:37:48,360
I don't know, but she'd gotten to sleep. This was

799
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:50,360
at like three o'clock in the morning, I want to say,

800
00:37:50,679 --> 00:37:57,280
maybe it was like five am. Yeah, because so the paramedics.

801
00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:59,400
I was talking on the phone to the guy. Now,

802
00:37:59,519 --> 00:38:02,800
in those days, the street I live on, there's two

803
00:38:02,840 --> 00:38:05,679
streets with the same name. One of them is south

804
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:09,400
of like Across Street, and one of them is north

805
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:14,679
And at the time GPS was not able, wasn't wasn't

806
00:38:14,679 --> 00:38:17,280
as able to find it like nowadays, like two thousand

807
00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:19,480
and four, it was. It was in two thousand and

808
00:38:19,519 --> 00:38:24,679
four yep, or maybe two. So there was the GPS

809
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:27,199
was kind of sucked, like you could you could find it,

810
00:38:27,239 --> 00:38:30,039
but you sometimes go to the wrong street. So I'm

811
00:38:30,119 --> 00:38:32,159
on the phone with nine one one and the guy

812
00:38:32,239 --> 00:38:34,440
was kind of a dick, like, which is you know,

813
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:37,840
kind of part for the course, sorry, but there are

814
00:38:37,920 --> 00:38:41,639
instances of that. So I'm panicked, you know, because it's

815
00:38:41,760 --> 00:38:44,280
me and I'm not holding it together that well. And

816
00:38:44,320 --> 00:38:46,960
I'm like, you know, my husband has just said like

817
00:38:47,039 --> 00:38:50,480
said goodbye to me and thinks he's going to die.

818
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:55,079
And I'm panicked, and I'm like you and the guys

819
00:38:55,199 --> 00:38:58,639
like don't ma'am. You've got to calm down. The ambulance

820
00:38:58,719 --> 00:39:02,519
is there, and I'm like, no, it's not. And he's like, yes,

821
00:39:02,599 --> 00:39:05,159
it is. It's on your street. And I was like,

822
00:39:05,280 --> 00:39:06,559
I don't hear any sirens.

823
00:39:06,639 --> 00:39:08,599
Speaker 1: Did you know there were two streets at that time.

824
00:39:08,920 --> 00:39:11,519
Speaker 2: Yeah. So I told the guy, I said, you're on

825
00:39:11,559 --> 00:39:15,599
the wrong street. Yeah, and he was like, no, they're not,

826
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:18,079
like he's arguing with me, and I was like, why

827
00:39:18,119 --> 00:39:20,599
are you arguing with me? I am telling you there's

828
00:39:20,639 --> 00:39:22,800
no ambulance here. They are not here. And then he

829
00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:25,320
was like you need to calm down. Oh my god,

830
00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:26,119
he got mad at me.

831
00:39:27,440 --> 00:39:30,320
Speaker 3: It was like they're not here, like tell them that

832
00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:33,440
it's Meanwhile, he thinks you're just an hysterical woman who

833
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:34,480
doesn't know what's happening.

834
00:39:34,519 --> 00:39:38,760
Speaker 2: It's north of Hatteras, it's north of Hatters And then uh,

835
00:39:39,000 --> 00:39:41,400
finally he was like just a minute, you know, and

836
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:44,440
then he relayed the information. And then they finally got there,

837
00:39:44,480 --> 00:39:48,400
but it was late, I mean stressful, and they took

838
00:39:48,400 --> 00:39:51,280
his vitals and all this stuff. Meanwhile Elbie slept through

839
00:39:51,320 --> 00:39:55,159
the whole thing. Wow. So you know, me screaming, the

840
00:39:55,599 --> 00:39:59,360
parametics coming in and they were pretty calm because they

841
00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:02,639
checked his vit and they're like he's he's he's gonna be,

842
00:40:02,719 --> 00:40:06,000
He's gonna be okay, you know, wow. And then they

843
00:40:06,000 --> 00:40:08,639
put him in the ambulance. And then I had a

844
00:40:08,679 --> 00:40:11,719
similar thing though, where I was like, oh my god, Okay,

845
00:40:11,760 --> 00:40:14,400
what am I going to do? Because I had to

846
00:40:14,440 --> 00:40:17,360
wake out. I had to get her up, yes, and

847
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:19,559
she had only been sleeping for you know, and I

848
00:40:19,599 --> 00:40:22,159
had to put her in her car seat. Oh my god,

849
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:26,360
change her diaper, probably put her in a car seat.

850
00:40:26,639 --> 00:40:28,559
I know what people are thinking, like, why didn't you

851
00:40:28,599 --> 00:40:32,480
train her, patty train her earlier, like at six months old. Okay,

852
00:40:32,559 --> 00:40:35,320
I wasn't there yet anyway. Yeah, and then I had

853
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:37,880
to go to the hospital. Do you remember this how

854
00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:38,840
I had called my mom?

855
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:41,400
Speaker 1: I sure do. I was just going to say, you

856
00:40:41,440 --> 00:40:43,719
did not have much support, no at all.

857
00:40:43,960 --> 00:40:45,599
Speaker 2: I called my mom. I asked her to come meet

858
00:40:45,599 --> 00:40:48,039
me at the hospital and take the take LB or.

859
00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:50,719
I asked her to come to my house. I think,

860
00:40:51,079 --> 00:40:55,320
like be with LB or something. She said, traffic's going

861
00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:59,360
to be really bad. I bring her here, which she

862
00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:00,840
lived far.

863
00:41:01,559 --> 00:41:04,679
Speaker 1: I can't. It doesn't even if she was me five

864
00:41:04,800 --> 00:41:05,440
minutes away.

865
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:08,559
Speaker 2: No, I can't drive her to you. I was like,

866
00:41:09,159 --> 00:41:11,679
I'm I was crying, you know, and I was like,

867
00:41:11,719 --> 00:41:14,119
can you help me? Because I thought if she could

868
00:41:14,119 --> 00:41:17,639
come to the house, what I could do is bring Elbie.

869
00:41:17,400 --> 00:41:20,480
Speaker 1: Back, because Elbie Stuck is there every day.

870
00:41:20,559 --> 00:41:22,119
Speaker 2: Bring her back, put her in her crib, and then

871
00:41:22,119 --> 00:41:23,840
my mom could sit in the house, of course and

872
00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:25,960
watch her, so I could be with John because I didn't.

873
00:41:26,039 --> 00:41:28,280
And John is like it has is big on, like

874
00:41:28,679 --> 00:41:33,679
not having babies in an er and like because germs, germs, Yeah,

875
00:41:34,360 --> 00:41:36,960
especially six months I knew he'd be upset about that,

876
00:41:37,920 --> 00:41:40,880
but yeah, she wouldn't. Yeah, it wasn't willing, Stephanie.

877
00:41:40,960 --> 00:41:43,639
Speaker 1: I don't know how you met that. I mean truly,

878
00:41:43,760 --> 00:41:47,760
Like I relied on on my mom like a lot

879
00:41:47,800 --> 00:41:49,000
when they were really little.

880
00:41:49,119 --> 00:41:52,480
Speaker 3: I mean in terms of like knowing I could call

881
00:41:52,519 --> 00:41:54,400
her if I needed something, you know what I'm saying.

882
00:41:54,519 --> 00:41:58,440
Like to go through having three children and not have

883
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:01,079
that family support, I don't know how you did it

884
00:42:01,119 --> 00:42:04,760
with like sanity, Like, ah, that's amazing.

885
00:42:04,880 --> 00:42:08,199
Speaker 2: Well by the time yeah, Sadie and Xander came along,

886
00:42:08,280 --> 00:42:09,960
I was more used to it.

887
00:42:10,599 --> 00:42:13,719
Speaker 3: But still now you have three children, like, I don't know,

888
00:42:13,880 --> 00:42:17,880
like I it's incredible, Like it's incredibly your amazing mom,

889
00:42:18,400 --> 00:42:19,800
You've done an amazing jo.

890
00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:23,440
Speaker 2: Santics back in the day, you know, I mean that

891
00:42:23,599 --> 00:42:26,119
was I'm just I was just thinking though about how,

892
00:42:26,320 --> 00:42:29,519
like I went through a few different things. I mean,

893
00:42:29,559 --> 00:42:32,559
we both have gone through stuff. But like when Elbie

894
00:42:32,599 --> 00:42:36,920
was a little baby, she had to go to the

895
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:40,239
hospital because she would get very easily dehydrated. So when

896
00:42:40,280 --> 00:42:44,440
she would get sick, she would not eat or drink anything,

897
00:42:44,440 --> 00:42:46,599
and I would have to sometimes put water in her

898
00:42:46,639 --> 00:42:49,639
mouth like with a syringe. Yeah, she just spit it out. Wow.

899
00:42:50,039 --> 00:42:54,199
She would get dehydrated, and the only way to help

900
00:42:54,199 --> 00:42:56,480
her and then she it was really bad because she'd

901
00:42:56,480 --> 00:43:01,400
be like puking and like and she'd get really really

902
00:43:01,519 --> 00:43:05,440
pale and be super lethargic. It happened a couple of times,

903
00:43:05,519 --> 00:43:08,800
so once when she was like six months old. That's

904
00:43:08,880 --> 00:43:11,000
really scary, yeah, And I had to bring her to

905
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:13,840
the hospital. And I remember my mom wouldn't help me

906
00:43:13,880 --> 00:43:18,679
then either. But you know who did come help me

907
00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:24,159
was my brother and his wife. And also do you

908
00:43:24,159 --> 00:43:27,639
remember this because this story that Elbie. We couldn't get

909
00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:31,920
a vein on her because she was so dehydrated. Baby

910
00:43:32,039 --> 00:43:35,199
the baby veins and they brought out a pic you

911
00:43:35,599 --> 00:43:38,239
nurse to try to get the get the needle in

912
00:43:38,280 --> 00:43:43,119
her and they couldn't so and I was like beside

913
00:43:43,199 --> 00:43:46,800
myself because she was just screaming and screaming in the vain.

914
00:43:47,360 --> 00:43:49,440
She might have been a little bit older, she might

915
00:43:49,480 --> 00:43:54,039
have been like fourteen months, yeah, and they couldn't help her,

916
00:43:54,039 --> 00:43:56,760
and then she ended up. I spent the night with her.

917
00:43:57,440 --> 00:44:00,719
I was not sober then, but I remember I had

918
00:44:00,760 --> 00:44:06,880
like xanax with me. I probably took an old vicodin

919
00:44:06,960 --> 00:44:08,599
that I found from like a but I.

920
00:44:08,679 --> 00:44:10,840
Speaker 1: Because and then you nursed her to just calm her down.

921
00:44:10,880 --> 00:44:13,599
Speaker 2: Of course, yeah, because I fed her till she was five,

922
00:44:13,920 --> 00:44:17,199
exactly because I'm a good mom. No. But then I

923
00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:19,280
spent the night in the picic you wow.

924
00:44:19,719 --> 00:44:21,079
Speaker 1: Yes, wow, And.

925
00:44:21,000 --> 00:44:23,119
Speaker 2: They still couldn't get a vein, and they, dude, they

926
00:44:23,239 --> 00:44:26,400
kept trying again and she would scream and then I'd

927
00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:29,679
be like, can you just can she just let her

928
00:44:29,960 --> 00:44:32,000
like get through the night or whatever, and some they

929
00:44:32,079 --> 00:44:36,960
ended up and gtube and G tubes yeah wow, so

930
00:44:37,000 --> 00:44:38,440
they and then they made me leave.

931
00:44:38,679 --> 00:44:40,480
Speaker 3: Oh god, because I got to put that in it

932
00:44:40,559 --> 00:44:42,000
in her up the nose.

933
00:44:42,079 --> 00:44:45,039
Speaker 2: YouTube, like two tubes up her nose so that they

934
00:44:45,039 --> 00:44:46,320
could get some fluid.

935
00:44:45,960 --> 00:44:49,039
Speaker 1: And usually one one tube, so I thought it was

936
00:44:49,280 --> 00:44:50,320
I it was two. They shouldn't be.

937
00:44:50,320 --> 00:44:52,280
Speaker 2: Able to really like breathe that while, Oh that's usually

938
00:44:52,280 --> 00:44:55,639
what Yeah, so they put a tube upper nose into.

939
00:44:55,400 --> 00:45:00,360
Speaker 1: Her inter stomach. Yeah, dude, Yeah, that's rough. She must

940
00:45:00,400 --> 00:45:01,880
have been screaming when.

941
00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:04,960
Speaker 2: That was a town. That's why I was in like

942
00:45:05,039 --> 00:45:06,519
complete panic mode.

943
00:45:07,079 --> 00:45:11,159
Speaker 3: Yeah, out of town, and your mom's like useless, I'm sorry.

944
00:45:11,239 --> 00:45:13,639
Speaker 2: There was a suit and he was stuck in a snowstorm.

945
00:45:14,159 --> 00:45:16,880
He was in Virginia and there was a snowstorm and

946
00:45:16,920 --> 00:45:17,920
he couldn't.

947
00:45:17,840 --> 00:45:20,000
Speaker 1: He mustn't bet speaking out too like it was not

948
00:45:20,079 --> 00:45:20,599
freaking out.

949
00:45:20,639 --> 00:45:22,119
Speaker 2: It was one of the most like he says, it's

950
00:45:22,119 --> 00:45:26,239
one of the most traumatic things. He was just like

951
00:45:26,599 --> 00:45:28,639
he just kept calling me and calling me, and then

952
00:45:28,679 --> 00:45:33,880
the reception was bad. And then the our pediatrician's office,

953
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:38,000
Oh my god. So everybody was out of the office

954
00:45:38,079 --> 00:45:41,119
and the on call person wasn't there. So it was

955
00:45:41,119 --> 00:45:43,360
like a practice of six doctors yea, and they were

956
00:45:43,480 --> 00:45:46,360
somehow they were all out. So they had like a

957
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:50,199
random on you I guess when this happens. And I

958
00:45:50,239 --> 00:45:53,840
don't remember why it happened, but they had hired somebody

959
00:45:53,880 --> 00:45:57,159
to be on call, but he wasn't in the practice, right, Yeah,

960
00:45:57,199 --> 00:45:59,000
So it was just a rando was.

961
00:45:59,159 --> 00:46:01,199
Speaker 3: Usually it's a lot of times that, Like so Jamil

962
00:46:01,239 --> 00:46:03,360
when he was in Fellowship, he would do that to

963
00:46:03,400 --> 00:46:05,119
make extra money. So a lot of times it's like

964
00:46:05,360 --> 00:46:07,159
someone in fellowship or something and they want to make

965
00:46:07,199 --> 00:46:08,880
extra money, so they'll take your call for you.

966
00:46:09,440 --> 00:46:11,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, So that's what it was. So I was talking

967
00:46:11,320 --> 00:46:14,960
to somebody who had it didn't know the baby at all, right, right,

968
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,679
I didn't know me and was having to be the

969
00:46:17,719 --> 00:46:20,159
go between because he was just an on call in

970
00:46:20,320 --> 00:46:23,840
my gospital to figure out how to treat her because

971
00:46:23,840 --> 00:46:27,440
they didn't know what was wrong. Wow. Ended up being

972
00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:29,719
nothing was really wrong. She was just very dehydrating.

973
00:46:29,840 --> 00:46:31,199
Speaker 1: Hydrated though. That's so scary.

974
00:46:31,239 --> 00:46:34,280
Speaker 3: I know, like when you have babies, the doctor always says,

975
00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:37,320
like when they're sick, well, are they eating, are they drinking?

976
00:46:37,440 --> 00:46:39,519
As long as you can get fluids down, it's okay.

977
00:46:39,559 --> 00:46:41,400
And then when they're not getting fluids down, you know

978
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:42,119
there's something wrong.

979
00:46:42,159 --> 00:46:44,480
Speaker 2: And that's what that's what happened with her A couple

980
00:46:44,519 --> 00:46:48,559
of times a baby she just wouldn't eat or drink.

981
00:46:49,039 --> 00:46:51,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, so when they get super lethargic, especially if they

982
00:46:51,280 --> 00:46:53,679
have a fever and they're losing fluid that way too, And.

983
00:46:53,679 --> 00:46:56,239
Speaker 2: I couldn't really like wake her up was the problem.

984
00:46:56,280 --> 00:46:59,320
So they were telling me to, like, but Jude, that's

985
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:02,480
so scary, like washcloths on her face and on her

986
00:47:02,559 --> 00:47:04,480
body and trying to and she had was running a

987
00:47:04,559 --> 00:47:08,119
high fever. Remember this story, because I brought her in

988
00:47:08,679 --> 00:47:10,800
and I was like, she's running a really high fever

989
00:47:11,239 --> 00:47:14,119
and they they take their temperature. Oh my god. So

990
00:47:14,159 --> 00:47:17,519
this was the guy that was working like not the

991
00:47:17,559 --> 00:47:19,519
front desk, but when you go in.

992
00:47:19,519 --> 00:47:20,960
Speaker 1: They're like nurse triage.

993
00:47:21,079 --> 00:47:24,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yes, So he took her temperature and was like,

994
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:28,400
no fever, and I was like, are you on fucking crack.

995
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:31,400
I was like, she's running a high fever. I go

996
00:47:31,559 --> 00:47:34,920
feel her, yeah yeah, yeah, she was burning up.

997
00:47:35,119 --> 00:47:35,360
Speaker 1: God.

998
00:47:35,440 --> 00:47:38,280
Speaker 2: And he gave me the most condescending look and he's like,

999
00:47:38,320 --> 00:47:40,760
I just took her temperature. She doesn't have a fever.

1000
00:47:40,800 --> 00:47:44,639
And I was like, take it again, okay, and then

1001
00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:49,760
they somehow he was so rude to me. But then

1002
00:47:49,840 --> 00:47:54,159
we go back. Oh my god. I still have like

1003
00:47:54,199 --> 00:47:56,920
a resentment against some of these nurses from that night.

1004
00:47:58,519 --> 00:48:01,719
So but somebody else took her temperature, only at my

1005
00:48:01,800 --> 00:48:04,719
insistence because I kept saying, they say she has no fever,

1006
00:48:04,800 --> 00:48:07,280
she does have a fever. And then this one nurse

1007
00:48:07,400 --> 00:48:10,400
was like, well, yeah, she clearly has a fever. So

1008
00:48:10,440 --> 00:48:12,599
she takes her temperature and it was like one hundred

1009
00:48:12,599 --> 00:48:15,360
and four or like one hundred and three point five,

1010
00:48:15,559 --> 00:48:18,320
like something high. Yeah, And then she was like I

1011
00:48:18,360 --> 00:48:20,960
was like, and she goes oh, by the way, but

1012
00:48:21,119 --> 00:48:23,880
very casually to the guide that she was. She was like, oh,

1013
00:48:23,920 --> 00:48:27,840
you might that thermometer doesn't work. But I was like, wow,

1014
00:48:28,400 --> 00:48:29,960
can somebody tell him off?

1015
00:48:30,400 --> 00:48:34,719
Speaker 1: Like you're like, I'm busy. I would, but I can't

1016
00:48:34,760 --> 00:48:35,119
right now.

1017
00:48:36,599 --> 00:48:38,880
Speaker 2: I were that asshole. I was so mad. But that

1018
00:48:39,079 --> 00:48:42,119
was when they couldn't get a vein. Say, this was

1019
00:48:42,159 --> 00:48:44,840
the same hospital trip. They couldn't get a vein, and

1020
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:47,400
then I was crying and he was like, you need

1021
00:48:48,000 --> 00:48:50,719
and I was luckily had xanax with me, but he

1022
00:48:50,880 --> 00:48:54,760
was like you are lucky because he goes we could

1023
00:48:54,880 --> 00:48:59,039
just stick something in her thigh, like into the bone.

1024
00:48:59,639 --> 00:49:02,760
Face lee. He was threatening me with like something that

1025
00:49:02,880 --> 00:49:05,960
sounded very like torture, and I go, I was like,

1026
00:49:06,039 --> 00:49:09,400
what kind of a hospital is this like talk to

1027
00:49:09,719 --> 00:49:12,000
like you know, I had my wits about me enough

1028
00:49:12,039 --> 00:49:16,079
to go like, I want a different a different nurse. Yes,

1029
00:49:16,760 --> 00:49:19,159
And so I got somebody else came and then they

1030
00:49:19,159 --> 00:49:21,119
were nice. But then they then they sent me to

1031
00:49:21,159 --> 00:49:24,519
the piqu because they couldn't they couldn't help her, and

1032
00:49:24,559 --> 00:49:27,079
then that's when they put the tube down and then

1033
00:49:27,119 --> 00:49:29,519
I slept with her on my chest all night. But

1034
00:49:29,840 --> 00:49:32,679
everybody in the pick You was lovely. Yeah, it was

1035
00:49:32,719 --> 00:49:34,159
the er where they sucked.

1036
00:49:34,400 --> 00:49:37,800
Speaker 1: Oh my god, poor little lb E sont But the

1037
00:49:37,920 --> 00:49:40,760
trauma of like being by yourself, oh my, I cannot

1038
00:49:40,840 --> 00:49:43,960
even imagine in an er. Cannot even imagine.

1039
00:49:43,519 --> 00:49:45,719
Speaker 2: They can't figure out what's going on and they can't

1040
00:49:45,719 --> 00:49:46,239
get a vein.

1041
00:49:46,599 --> 00:49:51,920
Speaker 3: That's your worst nightmare, like worst nightmare. Yeah, oh my god, Stephanie.

1042
00:49:52,599 --> 00:49:57,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like it's amazing that I function without Xanax currently.

1043
00:49:57,800 --> 00:49:59,840
Speaker 1: No, seriously, I mean, I just.

1044
00:50:00,079 --> 00:50:03,599
Speaker 2: You just don't like you're fine. You're just like if

1045
00:50:03,639 --> 00:50:06,679
I wasn't addicted, if I wasn't an addict, I would

1046
00:50:06,719 --> 00:50:08,360
just I would be like, I'm gonna take one right now,

1047
00:50:08,400 --> 00:50:11,000
just telling this, retelling this story, I know, right.

1048
00:50:11,119 --> 00:50:14,000
Speaker 1: I mean, the problem is, Zamax, give me a quarter.

1049
00:50:14,960 --> 00:50:17,039
Speaker 3: If you don't need it, yea, then it kind of

1050
00:50:17,079 --> 00:50:19,480
makes you just tired and useless, like I like to

1051
00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:22,280
be busy in doing things, but when you need it,

1052
00:50:22,280 --> 00:50:23,519
it just makes you feel normal.

1053
00:50:24,079 --> 00:50:25,679
Speaker 1: If you don't need it, it's just more of like

1054
00:50:25,719 --> 00:50:27,880
a downer. Really, it just like makes you kind of

1055
00:50:27,920 --> 00:50:29,719
like too chill.

1056
00:50:29,760 --> 00:50:33,920
Speaker 2: I don't know if that is such non addicts it's

1057
00:50:34,039 --> 00:50:37,719
not a downer. It's called taking the edge off. It's

1058
00:50:37,760 --> 00:50:41,159
the greatest feeling ever. If you don't walk around with

1059
00:50:41,239 --> 00:50:43,679
a certain degree of edge, then I guess you don't

1060
00:50:43,760 --> 00:50:46,559
know that life is better when you take that edge off.

1061
00:50:47,159 --> 00:50:49,440
Speaker 1: See that's so funny. Oh my god.

1062
00:50:49,519 --> 00:50:51,920
Speaker 3: No, I don't like alcohol. I don't like any of that.

1063
00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:54,760
I like to feel every feeling. I like to have

1064
00:50:54,760 --> 00:50:56,920
a lot of energy, and I like to like tackle

1065
00:50:56,960 --> 00:51:02,840
the day. Like I'm totally the opposite friends.

1066
00:51:02,960 --> 00:51:06,440
Speaker 2: So true. You know, it's funny though. I think I

1067
00:51:06,599 --> 00:51:08,360
liked you more when I realized you were having some

1068
00:51:08,400 --> 00:51:12,519
panic attacks because you were always like very chill about,

1069
00:51:12,559 --> 00:51:15,760
like guarenteeing, you know, like when I meet you, I

1070
00:51:15,800 --> 00:51:19,239
think Laura and I because that was our original threesome.

1071
00:51:20,440 --> 00:51:24,320
I met Julie. Yeah, I've told this story a million times,

1072
00:51:24,360 --> 00:51:26,280
and Laura will listen to this episode and get a

1073
00:51:26,360 --> 00:51:28,599
kick out of it. But yeah, Lara got mad because

1074
00:51:28,599 --> 00:51:33,000
I met Julie, and Lara was like, oh great, so

1075
00:51:33,039 --> 00:51:36,800
now you're friends with Kasey Kaysum's daughters. Remember you're you're

1076
00:51:36,840 --> 00:51:37,519
moving on up.

1077
00:51:37,599 --> 00:51:37,760
Speaker 3: Yea.

1078
00:51:38,320 --> 00:51:40,239
Speaker 2: She only brought that out when I met somebody who

1079
00:51:40,239 --> 00:51:41,400
had a pool pool, and then.

1080
00:51:41,639 --> 00:51:45,039
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh you have a friend with a pool.

1081
00:51:45,199 --> 00:51:49,079
Speaker 2: Oh, so first it's Katy Keith's daughter. Then you're moving

1082
00:51:49,159 --> 00:51:52,280
up to the people with a pool. But no, but

1083
00:51:52,320 --> 00:51:54,400
the three of us hung out together all the time,

1084
00:51:54,800 --> 00:51:57,880
and Laura and I both run high strung, like yeah,

1085
00:51:58,519 --> 00:52:02,840
I look calm next to Laura, Yes, because Lara would

1086
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:06,360
run very, very anxious. Yes, And then you would just

1087
00:52:06,400 --> 00:52:08,280
be like the show like cool cool.

1088
00:52:08,159 --> 00:52:11,199
Speaker 3: Like well, that is the weird thing I feel like

1089
00:52:11,440 --> 00:52:13,639
in life. I don't know if it's because I worked

1090
00:52:13,679 --> 00:52:16,199
in hospice for a while way back, and you know,

1091
00:52:16,679 --> 00:52:21,719
before I had kids or whatever, but like, if shit

1092
00:52:21,840 --> 00:52:24,679
ain't that bad or whatever, you know what I mean, Like,

1093
00:52:25,039 --> 00:52:27,519
you see shit that's really bad, and then you see

1094
00:52:27,559 --> 00:52:29,719
everything else and you're like, you know what, it's not

1095
00:52:29,760 --> 00:52:31,519
that big of a deal. So the fact that I

1096
00:52:31,519 --> 00:52:34,400
have panic attacks is so funny because I'm like, there's

1097
00:52:34,440 --> 00:52:39,920
nothing to panic about. Everything's fine, everybody's fine, everybody's you know, I'm.

1098
00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:42,039
Speaker 1: Willing healthy, everybody's okay. You know.

1099
00:52:42,119 --> 00:52:44,119
Speaker 3: Yes, of course there are bumps in the road with

1100
00:52:44,199 --> 00:52:46,679
life in general, and it's okay to have feelings and

1101
00:52:46,719 --> 00:52:48,920
be sad and cry and be angry. Of course I'm

1102
00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:52,079
not saying like everything is honky dory, But for the

1103
00:52:52,079 --> 00:52:55,039
most part, nothing is an emergency, you know what I mean,

1104
00:52:55,440 --> 00:52:57,599
And so I do feel that way. But then I

1105
00:52:57,639 --> 00:52:59,599
get these weird panic attacks that make me feel like

1106
00:52:59,599 --> 00:53:01,800
I'm going to die and life is an emergency. So

1107
00:53:01,840 --> 00:53:04,119
it's kind of this weird dichotomy. It's kind of funny.

1108
00:53:04,440 --> 00:53:09,079
Speaker 1: But yeah, so I try. I try to worry when

1109
00:53:09,079 --> 00:53:10,400
I need to worry.

1110
00:53:10,679 --> 00:53:15,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I try to worry as much as possible. No,

1111
00:53:16,119 --> 00:53:18,800
I try not to worry when I don't need to worry.

1112
00:53:18,840 --> 00:53:21,639
But do you ever still feel and then we can

1113
00:53:21,719 --> 00:53:23,679
we can wrap this up. But do you ever still

1114
00:53:23,719 --> 00:53:27,519
feel anxiety for no real reason? Just like yes, Like

1115
00:53:27,559 --> 00:53:29,679
I'm feeling it today and I kind of think I

1116
00:53:29,719 --> 00:53:32,400
know what it is, even though it's not a big deal.

1117
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:35,360
But like we're we have we're doing our taxes tonight,

1118
00:53:35,400 --> 00:53:38,800
we have a call with our accountant. There's no real

1119
00:53:38,960 --> 00:53:41,599
reason to be anxious about it. Everything's fine, we've already

1120
00:53:42,159 --> 00:53:45,119
we have all the numbers. But there's something that feels

1121
00:53:45,159 --> 00:53:48,119
a little out of control about like yes, or I

1122
00:53:48,159 --> 00:53:50,519
don't know what it is, Like what if he says,

1123
00:53:50,760 --> 00:53:53,400
will you guys are twenty thousand dollars, right, Just there's

1124
00:53:53,440 --> 00:53:56,039
something about not knowing what's going to happen that gives

1125
00:53:56,079 --> 00:53:57,880
me this weird like when I'm like.

1126
00:53:58,440 --> 00:54:01,039
Speaker 3: This anxious feeling. No, I get that, don't get me.

1127
00:54:01,079 --> 00:54:03,639
I'm not like so chill, like life is perfect. I'm

1128
00:54:03,639 --> 00:54:07,159
not like perma high, where everything's perma baked, where everything's

1129
00:54:07,199 --> 00:54:08,320
totally by nothing.

1130
00:54:08,119 --> 00:54:10,920
Speaker 1: To worry about here. No, of course I worry. I mean,

1131
00:54:11,000 --> 00:54:13,719
of course, but that's very normal.

1132
00:54:13,800 --> 00:54:16,800
Speaker 3: By the way, to have anxiety over things that you

1133
00:54:16,840 --> 00:54:18,079
should feel anxious about.

1134
00:54:18,119 --> 00:54:19,519
Speaker 1: Doing taxes is awful.

1135
00:54:19,599 --> 00:54:21,480
Speaker 3: I mean every year when it comes around, that's the

1136
00:54:21,519 --> 00:54:23,880
world that we hate doing that. No, of course, And

1137
00:54:23,960 --> 00:54:26,559
yes I get anxiety, Like to your question, I will

1138
00:54:26,559 --> 00:54:29,639
get anxiety randomly, like actually, funny enough, driving over here,

1139
00:54:29,760 --> 00:54:31,239
I was really anxious, and I'm.

1140
00:54:31,039 --> 00:54:34,280
Speaker 1: Like, why do I have it? Like why everything's.

1141
00:54:33,840 --> 00:54:36,320
Speaker 3: Fine, I have a day off of work, I'm chilling,

1142
00:54:36,400 --> 00:54:37,920
I'm going to do a fun podcast.

1143
00:54:38,199 --> 00:54:40,880
Speaker 1: But I had like that, just anxiety. I don't know. Yeah,

1144
00:54:40,920 --> 00:54:42,519
that's very normal. I think a lot of people get

1145
00:54:42,519 --> 00:54:43,599
that when when.

1146
00:54:43,480 --> 00:54:45,960
Speaker 3: There's not necessarily something to be anxious about and you

1147
00:54:46,079 --> 00:54:49,599
just feel anxious. Yeah, that's totally normal. I mean, especially taxes.

1148
00:54:49,599 --> 00:54:51,719
Even though you say it's all laid out, you still

1149
00:54:51,719 --> 00:54:53,800
have to meet with an accountant and like talk about

1150
00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:57,320
life and money, and that's money is so stressful.

1151
00:54:57,400 --> 00:55:00,000
Speaker 1: Always like ugh, yeah, no, that's very nice.

1152
00:55:00,519 --> 00:55:03,599
Speaker 2: I'm always like did I forget something? Right? I make

1153
00:55:03,679 --> 00:55:06,559
money from so many different sources, and I'm like, right,

1154
00:55:06,719 --> 00:55:07,559
did I forget about it?

1155
00:55:07,559 --> 00:55:09,679
Speaker 1: Am I gonna get audited? Do I have my receipts?

1156
00:55:09,800 --> 00:55:09,960
Speaker 2: Oh?

1157
00:55:10,440 --> 00:55:11,320
Speaker 1: It's the worst feeling.

1158
00:55:11,760 --> 00:55:14,320
Speaker 2: Maybe it is too because I have been audited. So

1159
00:55:15,000 --> 00:55:17,400
it's like which was like the shittiest.

1160
00:55:17,119 --> 00:55:18,800
Speaker 1: It's awful, I'm sure. Yeah.

1161
00:55:18,800 --> 00:55:23,360
Speaker 2: So John runs way more anxious about like potential audit,

1162
00:55:23,400 --> 00:55:25,000
like are we allowed to write this off? Or are

1163
00:55:25,000 --> 00:55:27,719
we allowed to write that off? And I'm always like, nobody,

1164
00:55:28,079 --> 00:55:30,280
it doesn't work the way you think it works. The

1165
00:55:30,320 --> 00:55:32,840
IRS doesn't come to your house and start looking through

1166
00:55:32,880 --> 00:55:35,519
your receipts. They don't even look at receipts anymore. Oh

1167
00:55:35,679 --> 00:55:38,599
the IRS. You your accountant deals with it for you,

1168
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:41,119
and they just give them numbers and then they go,

1169
00:55:41,239 --> 00:55:43,480
yes we'll allow that or no we won't. Right, right,

1170
00:55:44,079 --> 00:55:44,760
It's happened to me.

1171
00:55:45,280 --> 00:55:45,480
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1172
00:55:46,039 --> 00:55:49,199
Speaker 2: Eight thousand dollars and then the accountant was in there

1173
00:55:49,199 --> 00:55:52,239
and then they were like okay eight hundred wow, wow

1174
00:55:52,559 --> 00:55:57,519
many years ago. But that was because I hadn't written.

1175
00:55:57,519 --> 00:56:02,559
I hadn't like, I hadn't paid taxes on the car

1176
00:56:02,599 --> 00:56:06,599
that I won. Oh yeah, yeah it squares like I

1177
00:56:06,679 --> 00:56:12,000
had this. I had a whole mess, yes and yeah yeah.

1178
00:56:12,039 --> 00:56:14,000
Speaker 3: And it's hard when you're running your own business, working

1179
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:16,199
for yourself, like it's it is.

1180
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:18,719
Speaker 1: There's a lot of gray area there, like what can

1181
00:56:18,719 --> 00:56:22,079
you read off? Not right off? Yeah, oh totally anyway

1182
00:56:22,119 --> 00:56:22,599
that makes sense?

1183
00:56:22,639 --> 00:56:25,960
Speaker 2: All right, Well this was like super super fun. Yeah,

1184
00:56:26,159 --> 00:56:30,039
only left a couple of business shout outs for the end,

1185
00:56:30,159 --> 00:56:34,039
as always, Adam Lerner, Yep, we love him. He's so

1186
00:56:34,199 --> 00:56:37,119
easy to deal with. He says a lot of fcol people.

1187
00:56:38,079 --> 00:56:41,800
So just if you have any issues, go to Adams

1188
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:44,840
got acar dot com. If you're thinking about getting a car,

1189
00:56:44,840 --> 00:56:49,599
if you just want some options, he'll help you out. Oh,

1190
00:56:49,880 --> 00:56:55,159
Heather is doing a shout for every show. So that's

1191
00:56:55,480 --> 00:57:00,440
holder wide dot org. That's the holder Wide Foundation, which

1192
00:57:00,639 --> 00:57:03,480
was created in honor of two boys that were killed

1193
00:57:03,519 --> 00:57:06,320
in the Borderline shooting, and they're doing a lot of

1194
00:57:06,519 --> 00:57:09,679
good things, and they do these big events and they

1195
00:57:09,679 --> 00:57:15,159
could really use some donations. So holder wide dot org

1196
00:57:15,320 --> 00:57:20,559
check them out. And oh I haven't done Basic Becky. Yeah,

1197
00:57:21,039 --> 00:57:26,039
pads and T shirts and coffee mugs and listen, the

1198
00:57:26,079 --> 00:57:29,239
holidays not that far away. Get something, get some funny

1199
00:57:29,239 --> 00:57:31,119
private joke between like you and your.

1200
00:57:31,079 --> 00:57:33,880
Speaker 3: Basic Becky is the best. We've used her many times.

1201
00:57:34,079 --> 00:57:34,440
Love her.

1202
00:57:34,639 --> 00:57:35,800
Speaker 1: She's on top of it.

1203
00:57:36,039 --> 00:57:36,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, yep.

1204
00:57:37,000 --> 00:57:38,920
Speaker 3: She's got great prices all the things.

1205
00:57:39,039 --> 00:57:42,199
Speaker 2: And in October she's doing a special just for f

1206
00:57:42,280 --> 00:57:46,119
c O L listeners. Do f c O L bogo.

1207
00:57:46,760 --> 00:57:48,079
Speaker 3: Nice bye, get one.

1208
00:57:48,119 --> 00:57:50,119
Speaker 2: She's doing a buy one get one. So f c

1209
00:57:50,239 --> 00:57:52,519
O L b O g O is the code at

1210
00:57:52,599 --> 00:57:57,239
checkout and do that and I I think that's it. Yeay,

1211
00:57:57,440 --> 00:57:58,119
that was so fun.

1212
00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:01,000
Speaker 3: Thank you, yeah, thanks for coming. Thanks everybody.

1213
00:58:01,639 --> 00:58:02,119
Speaker 2: Love you guys.

1214
00:58:02,159 --> 00:58:03,599
Speaker 1: You're a parent now, don't if it up

1215
00:58:08,639 --> 00:58:09,559
Speaker 3: That Angels