WEBVTT 1 00:00:02.240 --> 00:00:05.120 Right now, I'm more nervous than Freeman at a railroad convention. 2 00:00:06.960 --> 00:00:07.599 We want both. 3 00:00:11.599 --> 00:00:16.359 If I'm not on next week, you know why, no 4 00:00:16.719 --> 00:00:20.039 white hanging on your line, sing a song of feeling fine. 5 00:00:20.399 --> 00:00:22.920 We're clean and bright as we can because we've been 6 00:00:23.039 --> 00:00:24.679 witing Tie Douche. 7 00:00:28.399 --> 00:00:31.600 Rat Drive from Hollywood Rock and Campbell's Tide. The Washington 8 00:00:31.640 --> 00:00:34.640 Miracle that gives you the cleanest Closing town probably presents 9 00:00:34.679 --> 00:00:50.079 The Red Skelton Show with Red Skeleton, Day Rose and 10 00:00:50.119 --> 00:00:52.679 his orchestral Lorraine Battle, Pat McKee and Zick Ryan will 11 00:00:52.719 --> 00:01:04.359 be mean, Rod O'Connor ron the Skelton scrap Book of Satire, 12 00:01:04.439 --> 00:01:06.680 a Storian titled The Big Scare and as fire as 13 00:01:06.799 --> 00:01:17.439 MGM's found Red Skelton. All right, rod Hi Skelton, how 14 00:01:17.439 --> 00:01:17.920 do you feel? 15 00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.200 I feel alive tonight? 16 00:01:20.079 --> 00:01:21.000 What do you know for sure? 17 00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:24.159 Say? 18 00:01:24.200 --> 00:01:26.159 How is that plane trip to Texas with Chuck Wallers? 19 00:01:26.200 --> 00:01:28.439 Well, the whole crew knew that I was a little frightened, 20 00:01:28.480 --> 00:01:29.719 so they gave me the business. 21 00:01:29.760 --> 00:01:30.599 Did you get airsick? 22 00:01:30.760 --> 00:01:31.040 Yeah? 23 00:01:31.159 --> 00:01:33.159 The hostess says, would you like to step outside and 24 00:01:33.159 --> 00:01:34.239 get some air for a few minutes? 25 00:01:34.280 --> 00:01:35.760 I says, we're twenty thousand. 26 00:01:35.400 --> 00:01:37.760 Feet Uh, what did she say? 27 00:01:37.920 --> 00:01:40.000 She was surprised and says, maybe that's why those other 28 00:01:40.079 --> 00:01:41.439 passengers didn't come back. 29 00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:47.840 Did you go forward with the pilot only for. 30 00:01:47.760 --> 00:01:48.439 A few seconds? 31 00:01:48.480 --> 00:01:50.319 I said to the pilot, I says, hey, that gas 32 00:01:50.319 --> 00:01:51.120 gage says empty. 33 00:01:51.159 --> 00:01:52.760 Does that mean anything? He says not to me. 34 00:01:52.840 --> 00:01:54.200 I got a parachute. 35 00:01:56.480 --> 00:01:57.959 Why are you ready to go down to the town hall? 36 00:01:58.079 --> 00:01:59.040 Yeah, ready to go, boy. 37 00:01:59.040 --> 00:02:00.079 As soon as they get in the car. 38 00:02:00.920 --> 00:02:03.319 Now let's go by. Are you still in that picture 39 00:02:03.319 --> 00:02:05.640 with Esther Williams? Yeah? Boy, what a job? 40 00:02:06.200 --> 00:02:06.400 Oh? 41 00:02:06.560 --> 00:02:08.919 I don't know. Esther Williams don't bother me. 42 00:02:09.439 --> 00:02:11.560 In fact, when I see her coming, I walk the other. 43 00:02:11.439 --> 00:02:17.759 Way, one other way on my hands. Of a picture 44 00:02:17.800 --> 00:02:18.599 takes place in Texas. 45 00:02:18.840 --> 00:02:20.360 Yeah, hey, there's one scene in the picture. 46 00:02:20.520 --> 00:02:22.639 This kid you Well, there are two guys and they 47 00:02:22.680 --> 00:02:25.159 both started and they're working in a blacksmith shops. So 48 00:02:25.280 --> 00:02:26.800 one guy standing, he's got a big pair of pliers 49 00:02:26.800 --> 00:02:28.280 and he's holding a horse shoe in the fire and. 50 00:02:28.199 --> 00:02:29.159 He says he. 51 00:02:30.719 --> 00:02:35.159 The pete, Uh get ready to hit to hit the. 52 00:02:37.280 --> 00:02:38.280 Smack this thing. 53 00:02:38.080 --> 00:02:45.639 With you And the other guy say, boy, I'll be there. 54 00:02:46.199 --> 00:02:48.520 So the guy throws the horse shoe over on the anvil, 55 00:02:48.599 --> 00:02:53.840 and he says, all right, come on, boy. 56 00:02:52.599 --> 00:02:55.039 H smack it. 57 00:02:55.120 --> 00:02:57.520 Well, hit and the other guy just till I hit 58 00:02:57.560 --> 00:03:01.759 it with the boot, the big big, the large slags 59 00:03:01.879 --> 00:03:03.159 or the or. 60 00:03:03.199 --> 00:03:03.719 The little one. 61 00:03:03.919 --> 00:03:05.919 The only guy should forget it. 62 00:03:05.919 --> 00:03:17.520 It's full now, hey, step on the gas and we'll 63 00:03:17.560 --> 00:03:17.840 be late. 64 00:03:17.919 --> 00:03:25.319 Okay, boy, say. 65 00:03:25.159 --> 00:03:27.000 You know we're gonna need a bigger town hall. Look 66 00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:28.000 at the crowd that showed up. 67 00:03:28.039 --> 00:03:30.479 Yeah, oh there's con cadetal hopper. I'm gonna go, say hello, I'll. 68 00:03:30.319 --> 00:03:31.879 See you inside. I want to see if we get 69 00:03:31.879 --> 00:03:32.319 some seats. 70 00:03:33.120 --> 00:03:44.759 Lady, pardon me, hey, clam, Well here I am. 71 00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:49.639 I've got plenty here nothing, yes, sir, right between my ears? 72 00:03:51.400 --> 00:03:53.879 All right, Well I don't feel so good today. You 73 00:03:53.879 --> 00:03:57.759 see my pet cake died. Oh that's too bad, Yes 74 00:03:57.800 --> 00:04:00.520 it is, but we all got to go or later. 75 00:04:02.520 --> 00:04:04.000 Seemed like everything. 76 00:04:03.639 --> 00:04:04.280 Happens to me. 77 00:04:04.560 --> 00:04:06.400 First, my pet pig dies and my. 78 00:04:06.479 --> 00:04:07.599 Cow goes dry. 79 00:04:07.800 --> 00:04:10.159 Now, my chickens won't lay an egg unless you bring 80 00:04:10.240 --> 00:04:11.240 back an empty shell. 81 00:04:13.439 --> 00:04:14.360 What you got in that sack? 82 00:04:15.280 --> 00:04:16.279 What have you got in that sack? 83 00:04:16.360 --> 00:04:19.079 Oh, this is a lock of my girl's hair. 84 00:04:19.639 --> 00:04:22.240 Clam, I never knew you were sentimental. You gonna carry 85 00:04:22.240 --> 00:04:22.800 it in your wallet? 86 00:04:22.839 --> 00:04:24.279 No, it's for scrubbing pots. 87 00:04:26.560 --> 00:04:28.120 Run in short on steel wool. 88 00:04:29.600 --> 00:04:30.480 Give me your girl's hair? 89 00:04:30.560 --> 00:04:31.000 Is that cord? 90 00:04:31.120 --> 00:04:31.319 Oh? 91 00:04:31.399 --> 00:04:34.519 Yeah, she hadn't bought a broom in five years. She 92 00:04:34.720 --> 00:04:36.480 just bends over and wiggles your eyebrow. 93 00:04:36.680 --> 00:04:40.160 Your girl must be a little Oh she is. 94 00:04:40.199 --> 00:04:42.879 You know she got braces on her teeth, got braised 95 00:04:42.920 --> 00:04:46.279 on her teeth. I have a lot of fillings, you see, boy, 96 00:04:46.360 --> 00:04:48.680 when we kiss, you should see the sparks for life. 97 00:04:50.680 --> 00:04:51.959 Are you going to the town hall meeting? 98 00:04:52.079 --> 00:04:52.319 Well? 99 00:04:52.399 --> 00:04:55.639 I might attend, but I hope that movie director Chuck 100 00:04:55.680 --> 00:04:56.680 Reisner don't speak. 101 00:04:57.079 --> 00:04:58.360 Boy, he's too convincing. 102 00:04:58.399 --> 00:05:00.399 He told us why we should donate blood to the 103 00:05:00.399 --> 00:05:03.079 blood bank, and the next day I went down and. 104 00:05:03.079 --> 00:05:04.319 Gave all of my blood. 105 00:05:05.720 --> 00:05:08.680 Look stupid, who's stupid you are? 106 00:05:09.199 --> 00:05:09.920 I'm stupid? 107 00:05:10.079 --> 00:05:10.920 Yeah, you're stupid. 108 00:05:10.959 --> 00:05:12.600 Well thanks for telling me. I'll straighten up. 109 00:05:19.680 --> 00:05:21.279 You know, if you didn't have any blood, you wouldn't 110 00:05:21.279 --> 00:05:21.680 be alive. 111 00:05:21.720 --> 00:05:27.600 Who's a wie, aren't you? 112 00:05:28.720 --> 00:05:30.560 My birth certificate said could be? 113 00:05:32.199 --> 00:05:33.959 My claim is good to see you. I have to 114 00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:35.439 go now. That's Captain's motioning for me. 115 00:05:35.480 --> 00:05:37.399 Well, I'll see you around. I gotta go bury my 116 00:05:37.439 --> 00:05:38.040 pet skunk. 117 00:05:38.600 --> 00:05:39.959 Did your pet skunk guy too? 118 00:05:40.279 --> 00:05:44.120 Yep, I think, don't keep the gutter? 119 00:05:45.800 --> 00:05:50.680 Hey, right over here, it's can meeting working to order. 120 00:05:51.519 --> 00:05:55.079 Why are we waiting for our Princeville speaker, San Fernando Red, 121 00:05:55.600 --> 00:05:58.439 who has been detained by a nasty accident. 122 00:05:59.319 --> 00:05:59.800 He's right. 123 00:06:02.519 --> 00:06:07.480 Racter and Gambo, the Gilbert and Sullivan of radio will 124 00:06:07.639 --> 00:06:09.720 entertain us with their coral group. 125 00:06:13.839 --> 00:06:17.000 We wear the cleanest post in town. Three happy husband's 126 00:06:17.040 --> 00:06:18.720 weep because. 127 00:06:18.279 --> 00:06:20.279 You married three smart girls who use the. 128 00:06:21.839 --> 00:06:25.639 Gets close any soap, any soap, Yes, any soap, You 129 00:06:25.800 --> 00:06:27.720 get the cleanest washing down. 130 00:06:27.560 --> 00:06:27.879 With the. 131 00:06:29.720 --> 00:06:32.680 Yes ma'am sing it or just plane say it. Tide 132 00:06:32.720 --> 00:06:35.920 gives you the cleanest wash in town. Because we've proved 133 00:06:35.920 --> 00:06:39.120 it in the laboratory. Why we've tested Tide against every 134 00:06:39.160 --> 00:06:42.040 soap you've ever heard of. Chances are we've tested it 135 00:06:42.040 --> 00:06:44.959 against the soap you've been using, and every time the 136 00:06:45.040 --> 00:06:46.000 results the same. 137 00:06:46.560 --> 00:06:46.920 Tide. 138 00:06:47.160 --> 00:06:51.319 Just plane gets closed cleaner than any other washing products 139 00:06:51.319 --> 00:06:54.639 sold throughout America. Of course, millions of you women have 140 00:06:54.759 --> 00:06:58.160 proved that right in your own washing machines. The only 141 00:06:58.199 --> 00:07:01.639 difference is Our results show up in facts and figures, 142 00:07:01.959 --> 00:07:05.600 but yours show up in the cleaner clothes. Your children 143 00:07:05.680 --> 00:07:09.079 wear the cleaner sheets and towels in your linen closet. 144 00:07:09.399 --> 00:07:12.680 So next wash day, wash your clothes in those terrific 145 00:07:12.759 --> 00:07:15.920 tide suns, then wring them wrinsome and hang up the 146 00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:17.600 cleanest wash in town. 147 00:07:18.519 --> 00:07:22.360 Get any any you. 148 00:07:22.399 --> 00:07:24.560 Get the cleanest washing tog with tea. 149 00:07:24.680 --> 00:07:25.279 I think. 150 00:07:27.040 --> 00:07:49.720 I order, ladies, gentlemen, order anything. Will now be addressed 151 00:07:49.759 --> 00:07:57.160 by the Honorable San Fernando rend Thank you, miss or 152 00:07:57.160 --> 00:07:58.720 where you get warm in your hands? 153 00:08:00.399 --> 00:08:02.879 Frans and you. 154 00:08:02.639 --> 00:08:03.560 Are my fran. 155 00:08:06.199 --> 00:08:08.120 I'm not going to make a political speech. 156 00:08:08.279 --> 00:08:11.279 I promise you that. And you know when I promise 157 00:08:11.360 --> 00:08:13.240 you something extincts stick. 158 00:08:15.000 --> 00:08:15.959 I proved that. 159 00:08:15.800 --> 00:08:21.439 By my campaign promises, whatever they were. And I ain't 160 00:08:21.439 --> 00:08:24.199 gonna make no political speech because that ain't why I'm here. 161 00:08:24.959 --> 00:08:29.360 I'm here because I'm scared to go home. I just 162 00:08:29.480 --> 00:08:33.759 returned from our nation's capital, Independence, Missouri. 163 00:08:36.279 --> 00:08:38.840 And I'd like to say that this freeze. 164 00:08:38.399 --> 00:08:40.759 That the government has just put on has gone a 165 00:08:40.759 --> 00:08:44.399 little too far. It was fifteen below zero back there. 166 00:08:45.799 --> 00:08:49.679 There was a terrible snowstorm, but there wasn't one eye 167 00:08:49.720 --> 00:08:54.320 cycle on Harry's house. Of course, when Margaret hits high Sea, 168 00:08:54.519 --> 00:09:04.960 something has to give worse. Every time Harry goes on 169 00:09:05.039 --> 00:09:06.840 that yacht, everybody has to go. 170 00:09:12.240 --> 00:09:12.720 Whens. 171 00:09:12.759 --> 00:09:15.159 I'm telling you I just got back from Washington, d C. 172 00:09:15.960 --> 00:09:18.320 And believe me, neighbors, when I tell you I saw 173 00:09:18.399 --> 00:09:19.279 Congress and Session. 174 00:09:19.480 --> 00:09:22.320 You know what Congress is. That's bingo with billions. 175 00:09:24.279 --> 00:09:26.360 Why I'm telling you they're spending money like it was 176 00:09:26.399 --> 00:09:33.519 going out of style. As you all know that, I've 177 00:09:33.519 --> 00:09:36.720 been in office only since last November, and I'm what 178 00:09:36.919 --> 00:09:40.000 saying that short time, I have accomplished quite a lot. 179 00:09:40.759 --> 00:09:42.399 I've made myself enough money. 180 00:09:42.200 --> 00:09:46.840 To retire already. But now comes for the reason why 181 00:09:46.960 --> 00:09:49.679 I'm looking you in the face. And as I look 182 00:09:49.720 --> 00:09:52.480 into your face, I can see there are a lot 183 00:09:52.480 --> 00:09:57.000 of faces that really need looking into. 184 00:09:57.519 --> 00:10:00.200 I'm here to fut a word around about them. Man 185 00:10:00.240 --> 00:10:02.559 who's been dragging Bond name through the mud. 186 00:10:03.080 --> 00:10:06.519 Willy lumplump. Let's look at the facts. Now, these are 187 00:10:06.519 --> 00:10:08.519 the facts. I'll get him. I ain't gonna repeat this. 188 00:10:10.240 --> 00:10:11.159 These are the facts. 189 00:10:11.200 --> 00:10:14.679 Now. This man is a disgraced star community. 190 00:10:14.759 --> 00:10:17.600 He has no job, he has no savings, He has 191 00:10:17.679 --> 00:10:20.600 no self respect, and he spends already time lying in 192 00:10:20.639 --> 00:10:23.919 the gutter. He ain't fit for nothing. There's only one 193 00:10:24.000 --> 00:10:27.200 job that he could hold, and you've already elected me. 194 00:10:29.600 --> 00:10:33.480 Let's ride really out of town on the rail. I'll 195 00:10:33.480 --> 00:10:35.360 tell you a few adult neighbors. He's gonna say the 196 00:10:35.440 --> 00:10:36.879 right thing, and I'll be impeached. 197 00:10:37.360 --> 00:10:39.000 He's got let's get out of here. Yeah, come on, 198 00:10:39.240 --> 00:10:40.799 she read the folk sounds sore? Do you think they're 199 00:10:40.799 --> 00:10:42.200 really right? Willie? Out of town rail? 200 00:10:42.320 --> 00:10:46.639 They bring a brass around, he'll get on it himself. Hey, 201 00:10:46.639 --> 00:10:48.960 but we can't let this happen to Willie. He's got 202 00:10:48.960 --> 00:10:50.000 a wife and three kids. 203 00:10:50.240 --> 00:10:51.679 I didn't know the lump Plumps had any children. 204 00:10:51.679 --> 00:10:52.720 Who's talking about children? 205 00:10:52.759 --> 00:10:55.360 They raise goots? What's come on? 206 00:10:55.559 --> 00:10:57.200 We got a one Willie, but the crowds after him. Well. 207 00:10:57.240 --> 00:10:59.080 Look, last time I saw Willie, he was in a 208 00:10:59.120 --> 00:10:59.960 pet store with Junior. 209 00:11:00.320 --> 00:11:01.480 What was he doing in a pet store? 210 00:11:01.559 --> 00:11:03.480 He bought Junior a couple of white mice? 211 00:11:03.600 --> 00:11:04.919 Oh no, what's matter? 212 00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:07.120 Well? I saw Junior and his mother inside attending the meeting. 213 00:11:07.200 --> 00:11:09.639 So I saw him take something out of his pocket 214 00:11:09.639 --> 00:11:11.360 and stroke it a couple of times. Then look around 215 00:11:11.399 --> 00:11:12.480 at the crowd like a fiend. 216 00:11:12.679 --> 00:11:15.159 Oh no, whoa, You don't think he turned that mouse 217 00:11:15.159 --> 00:11:15.720 loosely to me? 218 00:11:16.000 --> 00:11:18.000 I wouldn't put it past him. Do you realize what 219 00:11:18.039 --> 00:11:19.480 would happen with all those women in there? 220 00:11:19.679 --> 00:11:20.519 Yeah? 221 00:11:20.879 --> 00:11:23.080 Oh well we all have to go sooner or later. 222 00:11:24.519 --> 00:11:25.559 Look, i'll tell you what you do. 223 00:11:25.720 --> 00:11:27.360 You go in and warn Junior's mother, and I'll go 224 00:11:27.360 --> 00:11:29.080 over see if I can get a beat on Willy lumplow. 225 00:11:30.720 --> 00:11:31.799 Pardon me, I get through here. 226 00:11:31.919 --> 00:11:34.360 Excuse me, folksy. 227 00:11:33.440 --> 00:11:34.360 Way to go for him? Coming? 228 00:11:34.519 --> 00:11:36.559 Oh, gangway, you'll be trampled. 229 00:11:36.600 --> 00:11:41.360 One has broken loose from the hogre. 230 00:11:41.399 --> 00:11:42.480 How nice to run across? 231 00:11:42.519 --> 00:11:43.799 How nice to run across? 232 00:11:43.919 --> 00:11:44.039 Man? 233 00:11:44.120 --> 00:11:46.320 You sorry? He wasn't in the car at the time. 234 00:11:46.440 --> 00:11:47.039 I know you. 235 00:11:47.440 --> 00:11:49.559 Oh no, Junior, I'm a true friend. I'd get my 236 00:11:49.639 --> 00:11:50.360 right arm for you. 237 00:11:50.399 --> 00:11:53.000 Well, thanks, fat Joe. I didn't know you felt that way. 238 00:11:53.080 --> 00:11:54.559 Here he oh. 239 00:11:55.960 --> 00:11:57.240 Cut my finger in that mouse trap. 240 00:11:57.320 --> 00:11:58.480 Well listen to him. 241 00:11:58.639 --> 00:12:00.519 He just said he'd give his right arm. And now 242 00:12:01.039 --> 00:12:02.879 I try to take a finger on a country blow. 243 00:12:05.919 --> 00:12:08.600 What have you done? Oh wow, let me help you 244 00:12:08.639 --> 00:12:11.720 get that conception off your head. Yeah, don't look nice. 245 00:12:11.720 --> 00:12:14.720 I kind of rat instead of a mouth there. 246 00:12:15.120 --> 00:12:17.120 Junior, how could you do such a thing as cats 247 00:12:17.200 --> 00:12:18.559 Rod's finger in the mouse track? 248 00:12:18.679 --> 00:12:21.159 I'm sorry, I do it. I won't do it no more, 249 00:12:22.080 --> 00:12:23.840 use big fat, greasy bum. 250 00:12:28.639 --> 00:12:30.360 You've been it all out of shit now it can't 251 00:12:30.399 --> 00:12:32.440 take a mouth now, you couldn't catch a Toyle in there. 252 00:12:32.399 --> 00:12:36.840 Now, white boy Clay, quiet, what have you got in 253 00:12:36.919 --> 00:12:37.399 your pocket? 254 00:12:37.600 --> 00:12:39.039 Nothing gets me with your finger. 255 00:12:40.360 --> 00:12:41.320 I heard squeaking. 256 00:12:41.960 --> 00:12:46.240 They need oil, and let's go home. You come to 257 00:12:46.279 --> 00:12:48.440 these meetings all the time, and I get you sleepy, 258 00:12:48.720 --> 00:12:50.759 and I guarantee you if you don't take me home 259 00:12:50.799 --> 00:12:53.519 within five minutes, you'll be done. 260 00:12:54.879 --> 00:12:57.360 Junior, I can't mother asked to present a loving cup? 261 00:12:57.559 --> 00:12:59.480 What for the chicken lovers of America? 262 00:12:59.519 --> 00:13:00.799 Of asking me to? Was that a cop to the 263 00:13:00.879 --> 00:13:02.360 chicken that laid the biggest egg? 264 00:13:02.480 --> 00:13:04.840 Well, send it to Schneider in Washington, boy, the a 265 00:13:05.039 --> 00:13:06.679 he laid with that new tax proposal. 266 00:13:06.759 --> 00:13:12.360 To go believe me now? Everybody will believe me if 267 00:13:12.360 --> 00:13:12.960 we don't look. 268 00:13:13.159 --> 00:13:14.360 I don't want you have in your pocket? 269 00:13:14.799 --> 00:13:15.879 What I got my poppet? 270 00:13:18.519 --> 00:13:22.279 I called him the way I see though? What's the 271 00:13:22.320 --> 00:13:22.879 big secret? 272 00:13:22.919 --> 00:13:23.440 Rod Well? 273 00:13:23.840 --> 00:13:26.200 I got Jr? 274 00:13:26.200 --> 00:13:27.000 And I have a secret. 275 00:13:27.080 --> 00:13:30.519 Yes, in a few minutes, I gonna let everybody. 276 00:13:30.639 --> 00:13:32.840 Oh no, no, you have worried Rod. 277 00:13:32.919 --> 00:13:33.480 What's the matter? 278 00:13:34.440 --> 00:13:36.000 You know what the matter? You heard what San Fernando 279 00:13:36.000 --> 00:13:37.279 said about running WILLI out of town? 280 00:13:37.399 --> 00:13:39.200 Yes, I heard that tune. I think that you're rotten 281 00:13:39.279 --> 00:13:41.720 candy because he's a nice man. Oh he gets your widow. 282 00:13:41.919 --> 00:13:42.759 I away time. 283 00:13:43.120 --> 00:13:45.399 But I figure anything is good enough for my own 284 00:13:45.440 --> 00:13:47.720 pap is good enough for wig Juli. 285 00:13:47.799 --> 00:13:48.960 Don't you dare talk like that. 286 00:13:49.200 --> 00:13:51.039 Your father is not a drinking man. 287 00:13:51.200 --> 00:13:54.360 Oh he not when I got news for you? Kdo 288 00:13:54.600 --> 00:13:56.679 you don't get that way from eat and come qua? 289 00:14:00.159 --> 00:14:02.840 I'm morning, I tell you Rob, this boy is gonna 290 00:14:02.879 --> 00:14:03.240 drive me. 291 00:14:03.960 --> 00:14:04.919 Oh no, I'm not. 292 00:14:05.080 --> 00:14:05.799 I get arrested. 293 00:14:05.840 --> 00:14:07.200 I don't have the driver's lie. 294 00:14:09.440 --> 00:14:11.559 Green. I gotta talk to Junior. Junior, what did you 295 00:14:11.600 --> 00:14:12.519 last see Willie Lumpa? 296 00:14:12.639 --> 00:14:14.320 But I can't talk here, So you get in so 297 00:14:14.399 --> 00:14:15.759 I can get some sleep. You take me out of 298 00:14:15.799 --> 00:14:17.759 here in our talk, guys, I could be home in 299 00:14:17.759 --> 00:14:18.840 the sleep in the little. 300 00:14:18.639 --> 00:14:19.360 Cage by now. 301 00:14:20.440 --> 00:14:21.480 My place is so crowded. 302 00:14:21.799 --> 00:14:22.679 I can take care of that. 303 00:14:23.039 --> 00:14:25.159 Oh you know what I got in me back? 304 00:14:25.360 --> 00:14:27.519 Oh good, heavens, don't take it out, junior. Junior, you're 305 00:14:27.559 --> 00:14:28.519 not going through with it, are you? 306 00:14:29.720 --> 00:14:30.759 Ladies and gentlemen. 307 00:14:31.080 --> 00:14:32.720 If the reason will step forward, we. 308 00:14:32.639 --> 00:14:35.159 Will get the judges final decision and get on with 309 00:14:35.200 --> 00:14:38.559 the presentation against means another half hour with our sleep, okay, 310 00:14:38.879 --> 00:14:40.440 scolding woh. 311 00:14:40.039 --> 00:14:51.759 No boy, what a break the way to break up 312 00:14:51.799 --> 00:14:52.720 communist meeting? 313 00:14:54.240 --> 00:14:57.440 I'm out caring A way that'll be good? Won't the FBI? 314 00:14:57.440 --> 00:14:57.799 I heard it? 315 00:14:57.879 --> 00:14:58.120 I did? 316 00:14:58.480 --> 00:14:59.960 Oh, Junior, everything is rude. 317 00:15:00.240 --> 00:15:03.639 You're all the chicken eggs are broken and the cameras 318 00:15:03.679 --> 00:15:04.320 are ruined. 319 00:15:04.440 --> 00:15:06.840 Will never mind that the mouth wears me mouth? 320 00:15:06.919 --> 00:15:09.759 Help me wire tiant order order. 321 00:15:10.000 --> 00:15:11.879 I'll have an ice cream shoda and a mouth. 322 00:15:13.279 --> 00:15:15.879 If we can have your attention, mister David Rose in 323 00:15:15.879 --> 00:15:16.840 his orchestra will. 324 00:15:16.720 --> 00:15:18.480 Play a bushel ed the peg. 325 00:17:13.759 --> 00:17:17.640 If you hate to wash dishes, then you're gonna love time. 326 00:17:18.039 --> 00:17:19.039 You must mean me. 327 00:17:19.640 --> 00:17:21.480 I really hate to wash dishes. 328 00:17:21.640 --> 00:17:23.000 Would you mind telling me why? 329 00:17:23.240 --> 00:17:23.839 For one thing? 330 00:17:23.920 --> 00:17:25.720 My hands hate that greasy water? 331 00:17:26.480 --> 00:17:30.200 Ah, then you're gonna love tide because there just isn't 332 00:17:30.200 --> 00:17:33.599 any greasy water when tide's in your dishpan. Why tide 333 00:17:33.640 --> 00:17:37.160 cuts grease like magic seems to make grease disappear. The 334 00:17:37.200 --> 00:17:40.000 water stays so clean and fresh. It's a treat to 335 00:17:40.079 --> 00:17:40.680 your hands. 336 00:17:40.920 --> 00:17:43.680 But I also hate all the time dish washing cake. 337 00:17:43.960 --> 00:17:47.079 Or you gonna love tide because tide lets you wash 338 00:17:47.160 --> 00:17:50.319 dishes quick as one, two three. Just wash your dishes 339 00:17:50.319 --> 00:17:53.440 in those heaping tide suns rinsom, then just let them 340 00:17:53.519 --> 00:17:57.400 drain dry. No wiping needed for you. See, unlike soap, 341 00:17:57.519 --> 00:18:01.000 tide leaves no dulling soap film, so you can skip 342 00:18:01.039 --> 00:18:05.319 wiping your dishes completely and they'll come out shining, sparkling bright. 343 00:18:05.839 --> 00:18:10.160 So try Tide in your dishband real soon. Remember, if 344 00:18:10.200 --> 00:18:13.079 you hate to wash dishes, then you're. 345 00:18:12.920 --> 00:18:14.440 Gonna love tithed. 346 00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:25.039 What is your next number? 347 00:18:26.039 --> 00:18:26.240 Say? 348 00:18:26.440 --> 00:18:28.400 The guy over at Joe's barn Grill told me that 349 00:18:28.440 --> 00:18:30.359 he saw Willy going into an art museum. 350 00:18:30.559 --> 00:18:32.640 Well, here's a museum. I know, I can't believe he 351 00:18:32.759 --> 00:18:33.079 being here. 352 00:18:33.279 --> 00:18:33.880 Come on, let's go. 353 00:18:33.920 --> 00:18:38.240 See anyhow, boy, Willie, Willie. 354 00:18:37.759 --> 00:18:38.839 Hey, Willie, Oh Willie. 355 00:18:39.319 --> 00:18:40.799 I knew this would be a wild goose chase. 356 00:18:40.839 --> 00:18:42.359 What if sure got a lot of statues in here? 357 00:18:42.519 --> 00:18:44.039 Look you go that way, I'll go around this play 358 00:18:44.039 --> 00:18:44.519 see if you can. 359 00:18:44.440 --> 00:18:47.119 Find you see that statue over there. Sure strange standing 360 00:18:47.119 --> 00:18:52.200 on its head. Looks like a gargoyle. No, it's willy lumplump, Hey, Willie, 361 00:18:52.279 --> 00:18:52.599 what are you. 362 00:18:52.640 --> 00:18:53.720 Doing standing on your head? 363 00:18:53.839 --> 00:18:54.240 Oh? 364 00:18:54.279 --> 00:18:55.960 Will you like the wall? 365 00:18:57.279 --> 00:18:58.960 Let's not get nosy, bud. 366 00:18:59.319 --> 00:19:04.079 I'm standing on my head because my feeter killing believe me, 367 00:19:04.279 --> 00:19:05.519 my fear killing man. 368 00:19:05.599 --> 00:19:10.359 My feet are big enough to kill ten mene, my wife, frunt, 369 00:19:10.480 --> 00:19:12.640 my socks and I have to tuck my toes in 370 00:19:12.799 --> 00:19:13.720 jack and weare I'm not. 371 00:19:14.400 --> 00:19:16.279 I never expected to find you in this place. How 372 00:19:16.279 --> 00:19:17.240 did you happen to come here? 373 00:19:17.319 --> 00:19:20.200 Well, I'm just happy to be crawling home after a 374 00:19:20.279 --> 00:19:23.519 tough day at the unemployment compensation. 375 00:19:22.960 --> 00:19:26.039 Liners here, so I thought I would come in and 376 00:19:26.119 --> 00:19:27.119 have me picked me up. 377 00:19:27.240 --> 00:19:28.599 Boy, what a brawl this. 378 00:19:28.839 --> 00:19:30.400 Must have been. Huh. 379 00:19:30.480 --> 00:19:36.359 Everybody's so blasted they can't move. There's no wonder they 380 00:19:36.480 --> 00:19:38.400 to drop left in the place. Looking at that guy 381 00:19:38.400 --> 00:19:41.440 who has stupid bummy got so stiff he started to 382 00:19:41.440 --> 00:19:43.599 throw his plate away and he's got holding it there. 383 00:19:46.200 --> 00:19:48.839 If you ask me, this is. 384 00:19:48.839 --> 00:19:50.839 An art museum and those are all statues. 385 00:19:50.920 --> 00:19:53.480 Oh yeah, well it looks like the same crowd that 386 00:19:53.599 --> 00:19:55.200 hangs around the tam tavern. 387 00:19:57.039 --> 00:19:59.359 This is wait till you hear this place. 388 00:20:01.279 --> 00:20:03.839 Looked like a child and hangs around at Sam's tavern. 389 00:20:04.000 --> 00:20:13.119 Only these bums dressed more tago. I think they catch 390 00:20:13.200 --> 00:20:16.319 their death of cloth. Look at that guy sitting over there, 391 00:20:16.440 --> 00:20:18.000 resting his head on his fist. 392 00:20:18.079 --> 00:20:18.920 Look at that. 393 00:20:18.920 --> 00:20:19.599 That's the thinker. 394 00:20:19.799 --> 00:20:23.920 He certainly is on the thinker. 395 00:20:25.440 --> 00:20:27.720 The way he was dressing looks like he lost everything 396 00:20:27.720 --> 00:20:29.519 he owned in a crap game and he was trying 397 00:20:29.559 --> 00:20:31.599 to think up a story to tell his wife. 398 00:20:32.640 --> 00:20:34.000 Well, I came to warn you that there was a 399 00:20:34.039 --> 00:20:36.000 meeting of the town holiday and the people decided you 400 00:20:36.000 --> 00:20:37.279 were no good and they want to run you out 401 00:20:37.319 --> 00:20:37.599