Speaker 1: Multiple people in my family clean my father, are veterans
Speaker 1: and the troops that.
Speaker 2: Have been to war and now they're back and think
Speaker 2: and be grateful for their service.
Speaker 3: Sacrifice, love for their country, just unselfishness, all that they.
Speaker 4: Do for us.
Speaker 3: There are some people in this country who take extraordinary
Speaker 3: steps to provide for the freedom and security.
Speaker 2: We forget that those people exist.
Speaker 1: We know them as the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines,
Speaker 1: and Coast Guard. They call themselves soldiers, seals, rangers, airmen, sailors.
Speaker 5: Devil dogs, and so much more.
Speaker 1: We call them fathers, brothers, sons and husbands, mothers, daughters,
Speaker 1: sisters and wives. We call them friend and neighbor. These
Speaker 1: veterans answered the call, now we answer theirs. They are
Speaker 1: the best our country has to offer, and we love them. Today,
Speaker 1: we honor them and we serve them. David Malsby is
Speaker 1: your host, and he welcomes you to this community of veterans,
Speaker 1: as together we are building the road to hope.
Speaker 2: And indeed we are glad to have you along. On
Speaker 2: a Sunday afternoon, those of you listening through the kPr
Speaker 2: C the nine to five oh on the AM dial
Speaker 2: here in Houston, Texas. Thank you for joining us, and
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Speaker 2: Beautiful place, great community, a lot of law enforcement veterans,
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Speaker 2: It's a beautiful spot. Republic Grand Ranch dot com. All right,
Speaker 2: we've got we have a full house here today and
Speaker 2: all Marines Army. We did that last week. Last week
Speaker 2: was all Marines to date, it's all Army. Glad to
Speaker 2: have you guys too. You've never been here before, which
Speaker 2: still shocks me. I'm surprised to let you in with
Speaker 2: the cap you're wearing their kip. There's nothing to say.
Speaker 2: So sometimes silence is the better, better choice. You know
Speaker 2: where you're at, right, absolutely? Okay, Yeah, So just Anthony's
Speaker 2: one of our lead mentors. I have him introduced himself,
Speaker 2: but clearly he has some things he still needs to learn. Anthony,
Speaker 2: you want to introduce yourself, well, I want.
Speaker 6: To stay in that category of things to learn. And
Speaker 6: you've asked us all at the beginning to show what
Speaker 6: branch we're in. So I'm wondering where your cognitive awareness is.
Speaker 6: You're saying with all marines.
Speaker 2: I was trying to trying to help you guys out,
Speaker 2: just didn't work.
Speaker 6: Anthony Murou, lead mentor at Camp Hope, originally from southwestern Pennsylvania,
Speaker 6: served in the US Army with two deployments to Afghanistan.
Speaker 2: All right, keep your turn cap Bond's pressures on.
Speaker 5: Yes, yes, it's a little pressure, but I can't.
Speaker 6: I can.
Speaker 2: I can handle it.
Speaker 5: From Kansas City, Missouri.
Speaker 2: Missouri, I say that show Yes, sir, you got to
Speaker 2: show me.
Speaker 5: Okay, fresh n I.
Speaker 2: T I'll show you a better cap to wear.
Speaker 7: That ain't gonna happen. Sorry, I'm sorry, this is just
Speaker 7: not gonna happen. I'm always wear this cap is always
Speaker 7: gonna say Kansas City on it. Unless I wear something
Speaker 7: from my late pops that's that'll be a pay had
Speaker 7: it now. I'll do that for him. But other than that,
Speaker 7: it's gonna be Kansas City baby.
Speaker 2: All right? And where Wayne, did you deploy again?
Speaker 7: I deployed to Iraq eight and nine with the first
Speaker 7: Armored Division out of Germany.
Speaker 2: Okay, and then we have an Army VET that's currently
Speaker 2: in our program at Campope. We'll talk a little bit
Speaker 2: about that as we hear these guys story. Ryan, want
Speaker 2: to terad yourself a.
Speaker 3: Right, Pastor, Ryan Schaffner. I'm from Houston, Texas. Hey, thanks,
Speaker 3: born and raised to the show. Joined the Army four
Speaker 3: got out in nineteen. I have two deployments, one to Iraq.
Speaker 3: My first appointment was Iraq and that was from two
Speaker 3: thousand and six to two thousand and seven. That was
Speaker 3: when they came out with the fifteen month deployments. I
Speaker 3: was eight months into it and it's like starting halfway
Speaker 3: all over again. And I have My second employment was
Speaker 3: with two on nine out of Germany to Afghanistan and
Speaker 3: that was twenty twelve to twenty thirteen.
Speaker 2: Okay. When did you join the army.
Speaker 8: In two thousand and four.
Speaker 2: Four, yes, sir, what were you doing before that?
Speaker 8: Before that? I was in high school?
Speaker 2: Okay, so he went straight out of high school.
Speaker 8: Straight out of high school.
Speaker 3: I was, Uh it was my sophomore year when uhame
Speaker 3: in high school.
Speaker 8: Claim to fame. I was the chaplain of the FFA.
Speaker 3: Really, yes, sir, I didn't even know they had a
Speaker 3: chaplain for the f f Absolutely I was the chaplain.
Speaker 2: Did you do anything or just oh, I had a title.
Speaker 8: I prayed us in and held the title.
Speaker 2: Okay, didn't strain your back then?
Speaker 3: Doesn't absolutely not, you know, clean up the stalls anything
Speaker 3: like that. I definitely had to clean up stalls, you know.
Speaker 3: As a matter of fact, on the way over here,
Speaker 3: we were talking about that because Kit bought a house
Speaker 3: that's right by the agbarns for Katie is SD and
Speaker 3: I told him. I was like, yeah, man, I remember
Speaker 3: when they first built that and there was only four
Speaker 3: because Katie only had four high schools.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 3: Now they've just opened their tenth high school in Katie
Speaker 3: I s d U. I graduated from Taylor High School
Speaker 3: in two thousand and four and went in the army.
Speaker 3: But yes, freshman year, I had a Lamb. My mother
Speaker 3: named it Bert Lambcaster. I told her, so, I don't names,
Speaker 3: because you know what's gonna happen.
Speaker 2: Did you eat it?
Speaker 7: Uh?
Speaker 2: Some someone lucky.
Speaker 8: People got to eat it again. They paid it. They
Speaker 8: paid one thousand dollars to Lamb.
Speaker 2: That's awesome. So all right, we're gonna be running to
Speaker 2: a break here in just a second. But real quick,
Speaker 2: let me give you our number, our crisis trauma line
Speaker 2: eight seven seven seven one, seven seventy eight seventy three.
Speaker 2: A combat that's going to answer the phone eight seven
Speaker 2: seven seven one seven seventy eight seventy three. We'll be
Speaker 2: right back.
Speaker 5: In the corn.
Speaker 3: I saw you in.
Speaker 2: So you fellas from outside of Houston. You heard him
Speaker 2: talk about the the growth of the Katie is SD.
Speaker 2: See here in Houston, we build things, we grow, we
Speaker 2: we get bigger. Unlike how many people live in Pennsylvania
Speaker 2: now a couple hundred fifty.
Speaker 6: Once again, they can't need an evaluation. But I like
Speaker 6: that you call us failers, trailers, hey, tailors.
Speaker 2: Trying to home.
Speaker 6: For those that are new to this, UH, this podcast
Speaker 6: and radio station pastor is definitely feeling it today, So
Speaker 6: I highly enjoy the uh the banter here this morning.
Speaker 2: Remember it's morning somewhere but not here. Just letting you
Speaker 2: know hey real quick. I love to share these stories
Speaker 2: when some of our guys who went through our program
Speaker 2: previously just randomly write messages and share them either or
Speaker 2: on social media or sindirect messages to me. This is
Speaker 2: from Joe mclinney. Did you know Joe? I can't remember
Speaker 2: when he came through.
Speaker 6: I'd have to look at the tracker.
Speaker 2: I mean, I know it all becomes a blurred about
Speaker 2: who was here when. But anyway, he wrote, I would
Speaker 2: love to thank PTSD Foundation of America for changing my
Speaker 2: life and connecting me with God on a more personal level.
Speaker 2: He got a selfie there with his house in the background.
Speaker 2: It looks like it looks like he's in a rural
Speaker 2: place that looks very peaceful and a big smile on
Speaker 2: his face. How about that.
Speaker 8: That's awesome.
Speaker 2: Yeah, which you were talking a minute ago before the show.
Speaker 2: You and I were both surprised Kip having been around
Speaker 2: as long as he's been around. When did you first
Speaker 2: get to Camp.
Speaker 5: Hope out there in twenty twenty three?
Speaker 2: Twenty two three, so he's been around for a while.
Speaker 2: You haven't been on the show somehow, and I don't
Speaker 2: know how you did that. But Anthony referred to the
Speaker 2: difference between today and your first day. Do you remember
Speaker 2: much about your first day?
Speaker 5: I remember a lot about my first day.
Speaker 2: How'd you hear about Camp Hope? Let's start there.
Speaker 5: So I was in a program in Kansas.
Speaker 2: City and I had a eight What kind of program?
Speaker 7: It was a VA program. It was called PRWP. So
Speaker 7: this was out of Topeka for combat trauma. Yes, okay,
Speaker 7: there was a guy named there's a guy there that
Speaker 7: I didn't think I would get along with.
Speaker 2: Those are usual ones that help you the most. It
Speaker 2: is true.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's still my good friends to this day. We've
Speaker 7: been good friends since that program. He actually told me
Speaker 7: about this place in twenty twenty two, teld me I
Speaker 7: need to get down to Houston because they could probably
Speaker 7: help me.
Speaker 2: And what was going on? What land did you in
Speaker 2: that program?
Speaker 4: Uh?
Speaker 5: What didn't you know? Uh?
Speaker 2: This is for the people out there driving around sixteen.
Speaker 2: I have no idea who is short. So I have
Speaker 2: to tell that to Anthony because he'll take an hour
Speaker 2: and a half and he'll think it was ten minutes.
Speaker 7: It's hard, it's hard to shorten these things.
Speaker 2: The green apps in the middle of him telling the story.
Speaker 5: Oh, these will keep you on the edge of your seat.
Speaker 4: You know what I mean?
Speaker 5: Car Uh let me long, long story, short high speed.
Speaker 7: Chase with the with the cops, got me there, uh
Speaker 7: twenty eighteen. I Uh I ran until I couldn't run
Speaker 7: no more.
Speaker 2: Is that what you're doing then? Running or you.
Speaker 5: I've been running from my running, running from everything.
Speaker 7: Uh and uh A high speed chase with the with
Speaker 7: the law, with law enforcement, helicopters, three other different UH agencies. Uh,
Speaker 7: we're on my tail and uh I ran out of gas.
Speaker 6: Man.
Speaker 5: That's basically That's basically what happened. I ran out of gas.
Speaker 7: I ran out of gas. All of the above that
Speaker 7: was my signs.
Speaker 2: So clearly you thought this thing through well and planned
Speaker 2: for the chase very much.
Speaker 5: No, absolutely not.
Speaker 2: What happened when they call you.
Speaker 7: Uh I gave up, I put I raised my hands up,
Speaker 7: I smoked a cigarette, and uh uh I surrendered.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 7: I spent a year in prison and uh I had to.
Speaker 5: Do some soul search.
Speaker 2: Yeah. For those listening, think that sounds this whole sounds
Speaker 2: a little weird. I have to insert some levity in here,
Speaker 2: because these stories can get pretty pretty deep pretty quick.
Speaker 2: Your first stay at camp, what was that experience like
Speaker 2: coming to a place that you had no idea who
Speaker 2: it was. I'm guessing you've probably never been to Houston,
Speaker 2: Texas before. Absolutely not a little anxiety into that.
Speaker 7: A lot, a lot of anxiety. But I fought everything.
Speaker 7: I fought everything they were trying to do for me.
Speaker 7: I didn't want to be away from my family.
Speaker 5: I didn't want to I didn't want to give up
Speaker 5: whatever a little bit.
Speaker 7: I thought I had myself to someplace that I had
Speaker 7: I had no trust in you know what I mean.
Speaker 7: I'd had no faith in anything. So I was very rebellious.
Speaker 7: So I can tell you that, uh. And I didn't
Speaker 7: want to I don't want to listen. But they were
Speaker 7: patient with me. And I think that's what I needed,
Speaker 7: somebody to just listen to me.
Speaker 5: Uh.
Speaker 7: I think in the within the three within three weeks, uh,
Speaker 7: I was in Oliver's office and I cried. UH talked
Speaker 7: about a few things that were bothering me. And I
Speaker 7: couldn't I couldn't help myself anymore.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 5: They started they.
Speaker 7: Started falling down my face man and and Uh. I
Speaker 7: remember Oliver writing a little note on his door and
Speaker 7: he put a put the date on there and he said,
Speaker 7: today that was a win. I didn't quite understand what
Speaker 7: he meant by that at that time, but I do
Speaker 7: understand what he means by now.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Ryan, let's go back to right out of high school,
Speaker 2: you're joining the army. By the army.
Speaker 3: By the way, my grandfather served in the army, and uh,
Speaker 3: I was the only boy, and all my cousins were
Speaker 3: all girls and I was the only boy. And uh,
Speaker 3: he told me everything. You know, he didn't tell my
Speaker 3: mom the stuff that he told me. And I was like,
Speaker 3: you know what I want to I'd love to be
Speaker 3: in the army, and stuff like that.
Speaker 8: Nine to eleven happened. I was, Uh.
Speaker 3: We watched the second plane hit and lo and behold.
Speaker 3: My mother's on a flight to New York that day,
Speaker 3: and I was having a meltdown. I was like, you
Speaker 3: gotta be kidding, you know, I didn't know if it
Speaker 3: was her flight. And after that that was the uproar.
Speaker 3: You know, the whole country's up up in arms. And
Speaker 3: I'd say a good fifteen to twenty percent of my
Speaker 3: class to join the Armed services, and I was one
Speaker 3: of them. I turned eighteen January seventeenth of four and
Speaker 3: January eighteenth, I was at the recruiter's office.
Speaker 2: So you knew you were going to go to war?
Speaker 8: I did? I did. They straight up told me say
Speaker 8: they you know you're going to wars? Yeah, I know that.
Speaker 8: I signed up too good to war.
Speaker 3: Why Why Because I was angry with somebody hitting us
Speaker 3: in the gut, just like Pearl Harbor December seventh, nineteen
Speaker 3: forty one, when the Japanese hit Pearl Harbor, everybody you
Speaker 3: know was angry. It's like, you know, punching us in
Speaker 3: the face, and we weren't having it. So I believe
Speaker 3: I wanted to get my piece.
Speaker 4: Out of it.
Speaker 2: What were you doing on your first tour?
Speaker 3: My first tour, I was a PATCHI crew chief and
Speaker 3: manning Apache helicopters, sitting them out twenty four to seven
Speaker 3: to eyes in the sky and keep our ground troops safe.
Speaker 3: We worked eighteen hours a day easily. We'd sleep for
Speaker 3: four hours, get back up, get back on the flight line.
Speaker 3: We had twenty four hour ops continually going. And that's
Speaker 3: not just in Iraqi, that's that's stateside too, So we
Speaker 3: worked twenty four hours a day.
Speaker 2: Just real quick, How different was your second tour from the.
Speaker 3: First second tour? That was Afghanistan? That was it was different.
Speaker 3: I was I was a sergeant at the time, and
Speaker 3: I was split from my unit and they sent me
Speaker 3: down to shank and that was nicknamed Rocket City.
Speaker 2: So, uh, Houston's.
Speaker 8: Rocket Houston Rockets.
Speaker 2: But they weren't well in certain parts of town. It
Speaker 2: could be.
Speaker 3: Absolutely. I definitely agree with you, you know, I can.
Speaker 3: I can definitely tell you in would over there, you know,
Speaker 3: go over there. I don't even think the police officers
Speaker 3: go over there.
Speaker 2: Gun's point yea, Oh absolutely. Websites ptsd USA dot org.
Speaker 2: Ptsd usa dot org not only for Camp Hope, which
Speaker 2: is a six to nine month program baith based peer
Speaker 2: to peer, but also our Warrior groups both for veterans
Speaker 2: and our support groups for family members. Our family groups
Speaker 2: all available online. Uh. Ptsd USA dot org. Got to
Speaker 2: take a quick newsbreak for those of this, you know,
Speaker 2: nine to five. Oh, we'll be right back with more
Speaker 2: of Road to Hope.
Speaker 4: Radio Beautiful Heroes proved again Liberating Strife.
Speaker 2: Full disclosure. I have a hard time breaking in on
Speaker 2: that song right there, that just feels unpatriotic to talk
Speaker 2: over that, that version that voice. Mm hmmm, I'd list
Speaker 2: that all the time. I love that Welcome Back Road
Speaker 2: to Hope Radio. Glad to have you along here. All right,
Speaker 2: So first day it's some anxiety. What would you what
Speaker 2: would you say your attitude was? You're just canna give
Speaker 2: him emotion? For what your attitude was?
Speaker 4: What was it?
Speaker 2: I mean too, was just anger, which is almost every
Speaker 2: single vet that comes into our program.
Speaker 7: Yeah, pretty much. I didn't know how to deal with that.
Speaker 7: That was an emotion that I like to just keep underneath.
Speaker 7: I didn't like to express it. I didn't know how to,
Speaker 7: especially without substances. So substances were uh sometimes that was
Speaker 7: my escape, escape from anger, and I mean a place
Speaker 7: now I can't do that, you know, I have to,
Speaker 7: I have to feel these emotions.
Speaker 5: And I didn't know it. I didn't know what that
Speaker 5: looked like.
Speaker 2: You know, you mentioned the three weeks in. Was it
Speaker 2: three weeks in when you broke down and cried yes, sir, okay.
Speaker 2: So often I'll have people ask me, you know, how
Speaker 2: do you kind of gauge the progression of someone in
Speaker 2: the program, And generally speaking for me, it's it's when
Speaker 2: you see someone smile for the first time, you know
Speaker 2: something's starting to click. And I mean it's the very,
Speaker 2: very very beginning. But guys come in so angry with
Speaker 2: everything and everyone, and it's hard to get out of that.
Speaker 2: So I look for the smile. You smile all the time.
Speaker 2: Now true, how do you think you got there?
Speaker 5: Ah?
Speaker 2: Was this? Was that that version of you? The current
Speaker 2: version of you? Is that what you were prior to?
Speaker 2: Absolutely not No, I mean prior to combat to Oh yes.
Speaker 5: I like to.
Speaker 7: I like to laugh and smile, and I like to
Speaker 7: make other people feel good. And I mean I think
Speaker 7: everybody likes to be feel good about themselves.
Speaker 5: That's you know.
Speaker 7: I don't think people want to walk around feeling bad
Speaker 7: about themselves, so sure, but I like to give that
Speaker 7: to other people, and I think smelling is my way
Speaker 7: of doing that.
Speaker 2: You know, Anthony, you've been around in a mentor for
Speaker 2: quite a while. You mentioned earlier you lead mentor basically
Speaker 2: mentor to the mentors. He mentioned something that we hear
Speaker 2: literally almost every week on the show, but we never
Speaker 2: really kind of dive into it. And I want to
Speaker 2: just real quickly let you dive into it for a
Speaker 2: second before we get back to Ryan's story, But he
Speaker 2: talked about the coping mechanism of the drugs, and that's
Speaker 2: not one hundred percent of our guy's story, but it's
Speaker 2: a high percentage for the for the John Doe civilian
Speaker 2: that's just trying to you know, raise his family, you know,
Speaker 2: keep the bills paid, keep the eric condition or on,
Speaker 2: keep food on the table, which is a challenge. There's
Speaker 2: a lot going on in the world's on fire. It
Speaker 2: seems like every single day when they hear that, I
Speaker 2: think they have to wonder how that happens and why
Speaker 2: that happens. You got any from the time that you've
Speaker 2: been a mentor and watched and dealt with these guys
Speaker 2: going through these stories, any insight on that that helps
Speaker 2: common civilian understand how that keeps happening over and over again.
Speaker 6: So obviously it's a very dynamic process when it comes
Speaker 6: to every individual. Two are the same. But I would
Speaker 6: like to think whether it be an intense childhood trauma,
Speaker 6: whether it be a lot of guys go to war
Speaker 6: and they come home and their families are broken, or
Speaker 6: they're broken and their family doesn't know how to interact
Speaker 6: with them or vice versa, or you know, and like
Speaker 6: I said, it's very dynamic. Is that you know a
Speaker 6: guy was in war and you know this sounds bad,
Speaker 6: but I'm gonna say it is that, you know, the
Speaker 6: responsibility of your family is important, it is very heavy.
Speaker 6: But the responsibility of another person's life that you're covering
Speaker 6: and counted on for ensuring their safety and vice versa,
Speaker 6: that's an intense responsibility.
Speaker 5: And if that.
Speaker 6: Responsibility is just abruptly and a lot of times, you
Speaker 6: know it's done in a way that that a combat
Speaker 6: vet has resentments. I've heard so many stories of guys saying, look,
Speaker 6: you know, I was just let go, or they just
Speaker 6: said they're done with me, or they you know, discharged me.
Speaker 6: I hear that a lot, and I think that all
Speaker 6: of those factors play a part in somebody not wanting
Speaker 6: to deal with that pain or you know, their their
Speaker 6: pains so intense that you know, I've heard you say
Speaker 6: it is that you know somebody that commits suicide, it
Speaker 6: isn't that they want to diet's that they believe that's
Speaker 6: the only way to stop the pain. I've heard you
Speaker 6: say that, and I love that. I think some guys
Speaker 6: when it comes to substance abuse, it's the only way
Speaker 6: they know how to deal with that pain. And to me,
Speaker 6: that's what makes sense. That's what I've observed as a
Speaker 6: lead mentor.
Speaker 2: Ryan. Let's get back to your second tour. You mentioned
Speaker 2: being in a rocket city, and your two tours were
Speaker 2: a fair distance apart. They weren't stacked right on top
Speaker 2: of each other. Obviously PTSD's party life. He wouldn't be
Speaker 2: at camp Hope. When did you first notice some issues
Speaker 2: or did somebody help you notice those issues?
Speaker 3: I can tell you right now I was having flashbacks.
Speaker 2: So while you were still in, when I was.
Speaker 3: Still in I got back from my second employment in
Speaker 3: two or twenty thirteen.
Speaker 2: Talk to anybody about it?
Speaker 8: I did not I did was the obvious.
Speaker 3: The stigma, yeah, of don't go to mental health, that'll
Speaker 3: ruin your career, and uh, you know you're weak if
Speaker 3: you if you, if you need help, and that's how
Speaker 3: that's how we were treated. And somebody set off, uh
Speaker 3: just jokingly as a brand new private and we're out
Speaker 3: in the field, uh, doing a field exercise, and he
Speaker 3: set off the same alarm that uh, the incoming alarm,
Speaker 3: and I I came to underneath the bed.
Speaker 8: I mean I almost died from that.
Speaker 3: I mean I had a rocket come in and uh
Speaker 3: blew on the other side of my tent, and if
Speaker 3: I was laying on the underneath my bed with my uh,
Speaker 3: my body armor sprout out over me and uh, somebody
Speaker 3: busted in and said are you okay? And I jumped
Speaker 3: up and I was like, okay, I had to get
Speaker 3: my bearing and went to the bunker. So I had
Speaker 3: I'd have flashbacks from that, just certain sounds would set
Speaker 3: me off in that I didn't understand it, and I
Speaker 3: never got help for it. I never went and talked
Speaker 3: to anybody, just because I didn't want to look weak.
Speaker 3: I didn't want to look I didn't want They always
Speaker 3: scared us, like, oh, you'll be kicked out and you'll
Speaker 3: never be able to own a gun again. So I
Speaker 3: kept my mouth shut and buried it deep and deep
Speaker 3: and deep. And that stuff will start festering, and you
Speaker 3: can only bury so much until it starts coming up.
Speaker 3: And once it's overflowing that boiling pot, it starts overflowing
Speaker 3: and everything starts coming out.
Speaker 2: So give me just a little bit about your journey
Speaker 2: from that to arriving at Camp Hope several years later.
Speaker 3: Several years later, so we're talking twelve years later from that.
Speaker 3: So I got out in twenty nineteen, December first to
Speaker 3: twenty nineteen. And my wife looked at it as a blessing.
Speaker 3: She said, don't look at as something bad, look at
Speaker 3: as another chapter. I didn't know what to do. I
Speaker 3: was institutionalized. I've the via No. I was institutionalized, like
Speaker 3: in my mind through the military. So, I mean, that's
Speaker 3: what I knew. I was a senior staff starting. I
Speaker 3: was a staff startoner for seven years when I got out,
Speaker 3: So I took a job contract job immediately, and I
Speaker 3: went right back to Iraq and heard that story a
Speaker 3: few times yep. And I went right back to Iraq,
Speaker 3: and I was there for when President Trump hit Solmney.
Speaker 3: I was fifteen miles away from that. And then when
Speaker 3: I ran shot the rockets or the missiles in I
Speaker 3: was there for that. I was there when they took
Speaker 3: over the embassy. I watched eighty second fly and I
Speaker 3: was like, gome on, boys, let's go. And I came
Speaker 3: back from that and that gave me trauma as well.
Speaker 2: Know, when you visit cities or other countries, a lot
Speaker 2: of people will look around and gift shops and such
Speaker 2: and fine postcards to send little notes of here's where
Speaker 2: I'm at having a great time. I should have a
Speaker 2: postcard from that the rockets coming in. That'd be a
Speaker 2: cool postcard. Don't you think.
Speaker 8: Fourth of July exactly? What are they going to do
Speaker 8: for fourth of July? For us?
Speaker 2: I just got to break the tension a little bit,
Speaker 2: get to smile back. Hey, we're going to take a
Speaker 2: quick break and we'll be right back with more of
Speaker 2: Road to Hope Radio. It's not unusual, but it took
Speaker 2: a little while to go from all the flashbacks and
Speaker 2: things that started to dissolve devolve from there. How did
Speaker 2: you hear about Camp Hope.
Speaker 8: As a matter of fact, my dad works at Meadowbrook Farms.
Speaker 2: Oh that's right, Yeah, I forgot about that.
Speaker 3: He's the assistant pro and they host the the golf tournament.
Speaker 8: Well, I don't believe they didn't do it this year.
Speaker 2: And meadow Brook Farms.
Speaker 3: Birdies for Hope, Birdies for Hope, Birdies for Hope. So
Speaker 3: my last I've had I've been in and out of
Speaker 3: the VA sixth floor. I've suicide survivor, I've had three
Speaker 3: suicide attempts just because it's like Anthony said, I just
Speaker 3: didn't want to do it anyway anymore than that was
Speaker 3: the only way out. And God spent me out every
Speaker 3: single time and said not today, not today, It's not
Speaker 3: your time. So my dad was like, you know what,
Speaker 3: he told my mom about it and everything like that.
Speaker 3: My mom got on it and she's like filled out
Speaker 3: all the paperwork and uh with my wife. And on
Speaker 3: top of that, I draw, you know, drug my wife
Speaker 3: and kids for hell because of all this mental illness
Speaker 3: that was unresolved. You know, the VA was trying to
Speaker 3: throw medicine at me left and right, left and right.
Speaker 3: At one point in time, I was taking twenty two
Speaker 3: pills a day. I said that I can't do this anymore.
Speaker 2: Remember day one a camp.
Speaker 3: Absolutely I walked in uh uh my sister dropped me
Speaker 3: off at camp and uh Travis and uh he was
Speaker 3: a resident at the time. Travis and George were sitting
Speaker 3: on the the uh ah bench outside and waiting on
Speaker 3: me because I knew I was coming. So I showed
Speaker 3: up and they said okay. I started uh getting everything
Speaker 3: put together, and Travis immediately said, welcome home, brother, and
Speaker 3: gave me a big hug, big old dude and gave
Speaker 3: me a big hug. And uh so started in processing
Speaker 3: with with George and uh got everything set up in
Speaker 3: in uh in the bay and then Bay Layer comes up.
Speaker 3: I'm the Bay leader, okay, okay, and uh he goes
Speaker 3: whatever you need, brother, We'll take care of you all.
Speaker 2: Velvet Vet. Let me tell you remember your first warrior group. Yes,
Speaker 2: I do.
Speaker 3: It was uh it was actually it was actually pretty good.
Speaker 3: I mean I didn't I didn't say anything in my
Speaker 3: first war group.
Speaker 8: I did not.
Speaker 3: It was a bigger setting. I prefer the evening war groups.
Speaker 3: It's a little smaller setting and you know, get everything
Speaker 3: out that you want to get out. Warrior groups to
Speaker 3: me are a phenomenal, you know, way to get stuff
Speaker 3: off your chest. And it's great because you're gonna be
Speaker 3: around people that they know what you're talking about. They
Speaker 3: don't judge you because they've probably been through the same thing.
Speaker 3: Somebody has been through the same thing, and it's just
Speaker 3: great to have somebody that'll listen to you not have
Speaker 3: any response back saying you know, well you should have
Speaker 3: done it this way, you should have done it that way.
Speaker 8: No, we don't do that.
Speaker 2: You take that pastor let's go back to Let's go
Speaker 2: back to say, when did you get to camp?
Speaker 3: By the way, I got to camp. Uh, it was
Speaker 3: the fifth of May.
Speaker 2: May. So let's go back as best you can in
Speaker 2: your mind to February.
Speaker 4: Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: Juxtapose waking up in February versus your attitude when you
Speaker 2: woke up this morning. Uh.
Speaker 8: In February, I didn't want to wake up. I didn't
Speaker 8: want to wake up.
Speaker 3: I was questioning my faith, I was questioning everything, and
Speaker 3: I didn't I really had.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 3: I even told my wife, I said, how can I
Speaker 3: care about someone when I don't care about myself? So
Speaker 3: I went down. I drug my I drug myself through
Speaker 3: the dirt. Uh for for several months, oh, actually two
Speaker 3: months to be exact. And then April I ended up
Speaker 3: going back to the VA and on the sixth floor
Speaker 3: and got into West Oaks and then West Oaks to.
Speaker 8: Camp Hope.
Speaker 2: What are you looking forward to?
Speaker 8: Life?
Speaker 3: That's what I'm looking forward to. I'm living for today.
Speaker 3: I'm not living for tomorrow, not living in the past anymore.
Speaker 3: I don't need to live in the past. What already
Speaker 3: happened happened. I can't change that. I'm not gonna worry
Speaker 3: about what's happening tomorrow because it hasn't came yet. So
Speaker 3: I'm living for today.
Speaker 2: Keep you now mentoring training, that's right, But even prior
Speaker 2: to that, after completing the program, been around camp and
Speaker 2: seeing a lot of these guys come through and a
Speaker 2: lot of life change take place on that campus. What's it?
Speaker 2: What's it like for you when you see the guy
Speaker 2: come in and go through the intake process like Ryan
Speaker 2: just described, and whether it's three weeks or three months
Speaker 2: or five months and you start to see somebody change,
Speaker 2: What's this like for you?
Speaker 7: It's a constant reminder of why I need to do this.
Speaker 7: It's not just you know, waking up going to a job.
Speaker 7: It's not just waking up, you know and going throughout
Speaker 7: the day. Today, There's there's somebody that that may depend
Speaker 7: on me to be there for a smile, for uplifting
Speaker 7: you know, comment, you know, you know, for just a
Speaker 7: ear to you know, just to listen to whatever they
Speaker 7: got to say. You know, today, I when I wake up,
Speaker 7: I I have to be that support that was given
Speaker 7: to me in twenty twenty three and in twenty twenty four,
Speaker 7: and I love being able to do that. I don't
Speaker 7: think there's another job that I've been early to.
Speaker 5: For this one.
Speaker 2: There you go. That's one way of putting it. I
Speaker 2: like that frame reference. That's pretty good, Anthon. We got
Speaker 2: about a minute. I want you to there's somebody out
Speaker 2: there and it's probably a family member watching, just like
Speaker 2: Ryan mentioned dragging his family through so much junk before
Speaker 2: he got to camp and how difficult they can be
Speaker 2: on family. But talk to that person out there. Either
Speaker 2: either is the one who's struggling or they are watching
Speaker 2: someone that they dearly love struggling. You got about a minute,
Speaker 2: it's the person struggling.
Speaker 5: Go to a warrior group.
Speaker 6: I want to go after what Ryan says is, you
Speaker 6: know we have warrior groups in the Woodlands. We have
Speaker 6: visual uh virtual warrior groups off of PTSDUSA dot org.
Speaker 6: And if it's a family member, I would highly recommend
Speaker 6: calling the crisis line one eight seven seven seven one
Speaker 6: seven seven eight seven three. We have a lot of
Speaker 6: stories of combat vet's where they're family members were the
Speaker 6: ones that initiated the process, So I would highly encourage
Speaker 6: the family members to do that. Plus they will turn
Speaker 6: lock arms with another family that's already going through this
Speaker 6: process that will help them as well.
Speaker 2: And a reminder it's free to share our story wherever
Speaker 2: you listen to podcasts, look for Road to Hope Brady.
Speaker 2: If you'll hit that subscribe button, we truly appreciate it.
Speaker 2: But I also share that also our social media on
Speaker 2: Facebook x formly known as Twitter and YouTube PTSD USA.
Speaker 2: That's the channel PTSD USA on YouTube X and Facebook.
Speaker 2: We'd love for you to share. Follow us on those
Speaker 2: social media pages. Lots and lots of stories, lots and
Speaker 2: lots of videos, guys telling their story, Graduates of the
Speaker 2: program telling what happened to them and what's changed because
Speaker 2: of Camp Hope. It's a great way to stay in
Speaker 2: touch with what's happening at the PTSD Foundation of America.
Speaker 2: How you can be involved in ways that obviously writing checks,
Speaker 2: but also just volunteering sharing the story. It costs you
Speaker 2: nothing to do that except a little bit of time.
Speaker 2: We truly do appreciate you doing it. It can actually
Speaker 2: help save somebody's life. PTSD USA, Facebook X and YouTube
Speaker 2: PTSD Foundation on the Instagram, Fellows, thank you for joining
Speaker 2: us today. Thank you for sharing some of your story.
Speaker 2: It's our hope that somebody out there connects with a
Speaker 2: little bit of what one of you said, and I
Speaker 2: know somebody will, so we'll be thankful for that. But
Speaker 2: thank you guys for sharing your story. Appreciate it. I
Speaker 2: hope you have great resks of the week, and we'll
Speaker 2: look forward to being with you again next week for
Speaker 2: more of Road to Hope Radio