Speaker 1: Welcome to Dad's on dayclok. Parental discussion is advised mature
Speaker 1: content beyond this point.
Speaker 2: Do you guys know what they call a terrorist that
Speaker 2: can swim?
Speaker 3: Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: A bath bomb?
Speaker 4: I thought it was a torpedo, makes sense.
Speaker 2: I don't remember the joke I said last night. That's
Speaker 2: the probably I didn't write it down.
Speaker 3: Whoops.
Speaker 2: This is what happens when the herpes infects the Dad's
Speaker 2: Ondaco episodes. But this is one seventy three. I'm non, I'm.
Speaker 4: Dope, I'm stone baby.
Speaker 5: All right?
Speaker 2: Cool? Cool? Uh so doing over there?
Speaker 3: Stoned? You're yeah, I open up a fucking novel.
Speaker 4: M hm.
Speaker 2: No answers like yeah, yeah, you're right, I'm tired TV
Speaker 2: a novel. What else should I be typing? Come like October,
Speaker 2: we'll be having this conversation like, hey, hey, my dudes,
Speaker 2: I uh, big day for me. I'm releasing my novel.
Speaker 2: But wait what yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, so I told somebody. I told somebody the other
Speaker 3: day that I was gonna write a children's book, that
Speaker 3: I wanted to write a children's book, and their response,
Speaker 3: without hesitation, was fitting. I don't know how to take that, dude, Like,
Speaker 3: what the fuck that's honestly a great question. I don't
Speaker 3: know how to take it. And I just kind of
Speaker 3: looked at him. I was like, really, like, I mean
Speaker 3: I could see it. I was like, what the fuck
Speaker 3: does that mean? Is it an insult? Like it like, eh.
Speaker 2: Could be, might not be.
Speaker 3: Never got an answer. I don't know.
Speaker 2: Well, it's now almost the middle of the week, So Dom,
Speaker 2: how is your week? Last week?
Speaker 3: My week was pretty good. I stayed at the Ship's
Speaker 3: Creek Motel in Wine Country. I had to I had
Speaker 3: to go. I had to go to northern California, up
Speaker 3: to Napa County to do some work, and you know,
Speaker 3: I decided to pick the cheapest motel known de mand
Speaker 3: and it was it was bad. Yeah, it was. It
Speaker 3: was an experience. There weren't like cockroaches and stuff flowing around.
Speaker 3: There wasn't like any kind of liquid leaking from the
Speaker 3: ceilings or anything like that. But the first like four
Speaker 3: windows that you come across had plastic bags taped over them,
Speaker 3: like like black plastic trash bags taped over them, and
Speaker 3: everything was an inconvenience to the front desk. Like the
Speaker 3: girl didn't show she was supposed to show up at
Speaker 3: seven and she never showed up toil like seven thirty
Speaker 3: multiple times, and you know, it just it was awkward.
Speaker 3: There was no no silverware or anything inside the room,
Speaker 3: Like the towels were kind of sketchy, but they used
Speaker 3: them anyway. And then the internet was just hot garbage.
Speaker 3: But then I flew back to Vegas on Friday and
Speaker 3: had a really good time. In Vegas. I got to
Speaker 3: watch my daughter dance in some dance competition called Thunderstruck.
Speaker 3: She did really good for her first time doing this
Speaker 3: new solo dance. She nailed it. She ended up getting.
Speaker 4: Eight eighth.
Speaker 3: She had eighth overall at a forty five people, so
Speaker 3: which was really cool. And then a couple other dances
Speaker 3: she did with other people she took fourth out of
Speaker 3: like twenty four people on her duet, and then a
Speaker 3: couple other prizes that she got, so I was really
Speaker 3: proud of her. It was a good time. But the
Speaker 3: best part of the weekend for me was that I
Speaker 3: had gash and I mean like gas gas, like the
Speaker 3: kind of gas that clears out a room type gas.
Speaker 3: And so I have you ever.
Speaker 2: Have you ever I'm not gonna say accident, have you
Speaker 2: ever farted? And then you accidentally like dropped something and
Speaker 2: had to turn around to pick it up, and you
Speaker 2: put yourself right into the fucking fire zone.
Speaker 3: Not quite exactly like that, but I have, I have
Speaker 3: gassed myself multiple times. Yeah, oh yeah, absolutely where I've
Speaker 3: like re walked through it.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 2: I think like the two worst places to gas yourself
Speaker 2: is in a small bathroom because it's like the toilet
Speaker 2: funnels it up. But the number one worst place is
Speaker 2: the shower, Yeah, because it's like you haven't even finished
Speaker 2: farting and the stench is already infiltrating your nose because
Speaker 2: the steam just picks it up hyper speed.
Speaker 3: It's like a quick mic Tyson punch to the face.
Speaker 3: I would disagree with the stall, and I would put
Speaker 3: my car in place of the stall as my top
Speaker 3: two worst places too?
Speaker 2: Is it only when the car is hot? Though?
Speaker 3: It's worse when the car is hot? Okay, but yeah,
Speaker 3: but yeah, I literally, dude, I was walking around the
Speaker 3: hotel about ripping ass.
Speaker 2: One more interruption? What about ripping ass and then getting
Speaker 2: into your car, because then you're carrying you're bringing it
Speaker 2: with yes, yeah, not while you're already in your car
Speaker 2: as you're getting.
Speaker 3: In correct, yes, that is exactly like you. You're shitting
Speaker 3: your pants as you're walking to your car, thinking, thinking
Speaker 3: that you've done you know, yourself a service, you're good,
Speaker 3: and then you get in and you're like, oh no,
Speaker 3: that motherfucker held on like cliffhanger, like stallone, and it
Speaker 3: just came right in here with you. Yeah. But I dude,
Speaker 3: I was crop dusting people all weekend, all fucking weekend,
Speaker 3: and it was fantastic. And like I there some of
Speaker 3: them you could they were so bad you could hear
Speaker 3: the gags of other people. They were audible.
Speaker 4: So or maybe you were just at a swinger's convention.
Speaker 4: What we all know, Johnny six spec.
Speaker 3: I don't think.
Speaker 6: Never mind, Yeah, let's finish that sentence alright, Stone, how
Speaker 6: is yours?
Speaker 2: By week?
Speaker 4: Was pretty all right? I Avery told me, like the
Speaker 4: most grown ass thing she's ever sad. It was like
Speaker 4: really interesting. So there was this kid at her school's
Speaker 4: kind of being a little jerk and it's been like
Speaker 4: going around being really mean to a bunch of other kids,
Speaker 4: had a bunch of altercations with other kids and whatnot.
Speaker 4: And I think it was in like her art class,
Speaker 4: this kid like ran up to Avery and just like
Speaker 4: decked her in the back and Avery kind of like
Speaker 4: fell and she was like crying, and her other friends
Speaker 4: kind of bandied around and was like protecting her and
Speaker 4: was like, no, like get away, you know, like this
Speaker 4: guy's being mean. And to put in perspective how being
Speaker 4: this kid is, there's a kid with alopecia in her
Speaker 4: in her glass, not her class, but another one. But
Speaker 4: they all do like the same specials together. And I
Speaker 4: think one day in either art or library, that kid
Speaker 4: grabbed a cran and threw it at the kid's bald
Speaker 4: head and just started laughing so hard and I was like, God,
Speaker 4: if that kid's not Jordan, holy shit. But but I
Speaker 4: was talking with Avery. I was talking with Avery, and uh.
Speaker 3: He gets funny the more you think about.
Speaker 4: I was talking with Avery and I was like, you know, kid, like,
Speaker 4: I'm really proud of you for like not getting mad
Speaker 4: at that kid that punched you. And she was like,
Speaker 4: I was really really mad, and I was like yeah.
Speaker 4: I was like, do you want to hit him? And
Speaker 4: she was like I wanted to hit him so bad,
Speaker 4: but I didn't because I didn't want to get embarrassed.
Speaker 4: And I was like, what do you mean get embarrassed,
Speaker 4: and she was like, well, I didn't want to be
Speaker 4: embarrassed because I lost my cool in front of everybody
Speaker 4: by going after him. And I was like, damn, that
Speaker 4: is not what would have happened with me. I would
Speaker 4: have been chasing that kid around the Paris or some ship.
Speaker 4: But like, that was the most grown ass thing I've
Speaker 4: ever heard her say, and it was just.
Speaker 2: So fucking grow.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, from a kindergartener, you know, like she's eons
Speaker 4: ahead of where the fuck I was at that age.
Speaker 3: She's kind of an old soul dude.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, she's definitely kind of a definitely. Yeah. It
Speaker 4: was just so eye opening when she said that. I
Speaker 4: was like, I'm really proud of you, like really really
Speaker 4: proud of you, you know. And I know it's really hard
Speaker 4: to have those moments and you feel like you just
Speaker 4: want to hit him back because it's the right thing
Speaker 4: to do, but a lot of times it might not
Speaker 4: end up being the right thing to do, you know,
Speaker 4: and it sucks you have to kind of swallow your
Speaker 4: pride in those moments. But you know, like, I'm really
Speaker 4: proud of you, and she was like, good, I like
Speaker 4: you being proud of me. And I was like, hell, yeah, kid,
Speaker 4: keep it up. You know love that kid, so proud
Speaker 4: of her. But other than that, it was just kind
Speaker 4: of normal routine week for me and no that else
Speaker 4: to report. Really what about you know me?
Speaker 2: It's pretty good. I uh, as Dome was leaving California,
Speaker 2: I was infiltrating California. There's a law that there's not
Speaker 2: two dads on dequi it are allowed in California at
Speaker 2: the same time, because we'll turn it into an Eiffel Tower.
Speaker 2: It'd be a very odd scale Eiffel tower. It's like
Speaker 2: leaning tower, a piece of meats tower is how it
Speaker 2: would look. But nonetheless, I went to LA for a
Speaker 2: convention for work. It was a good time, and uh
Speaker 2: the I was really hoping we'd get there in time
Speaker 2: so I could watch an LA Kings playoff game. But
Speaker 2: I got there the day after game two, and then
Speaker 2: I got home on Sunday and tonight's the first night
Speaker 2: back there. So but it would have been cool because
Speaker 2: I would have spent the money if I we were
Speaker 2: staying literally right next to Crypto dot Com arena, and
Speaker 2: had I been there and there was a playoff game,
Speaker 2: I don't even care if it was like four hundred
Speaker 2: bucks out of dropped the ticket to go to go
Speaker 2: to a fucking NHL playoff game like that. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but and.
Speaker 4: Now wild how it's Crypto dot Com arena, Like we're
Speaker 4: at that point now with acceptance of cryptook over the Staple.
Speaker 2: Because it used to be Staples, Yeah, Staple Center and
Speaker 2: then it changed to Crypto dot Com. I don't know
Speaker 2: in the last five years. Well just wild wild right. Yeah,
Speaker 2: So but yeah, it was good. I came home and uh, everything,
Speaker 2: everything seems to be going good right now. And yeah,
Speaker 2: watching hockey, watching lots of hockey.
Speaker 4: You you got to you got to go eat some
Speaker 4: fancy dinner with some fucking fancy people.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah one of the Okay, that was one
Speaker 2: of the things. So the went out with some medical
Speaker 2: reps for dinner and had had some fun.
Speaker 4: That big pharma baby.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they ain't paying, it's their company that's paying. Spend
Speaker 2: that money.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: They picked this place in Beverly Hills, right, And I
Speaker 2: asked my doctor, I said, who picked this place? And
Speaker 2: he said they did. And I'm like, because he's got
Speaker 2: that he's got that that little twinge to him that
Speaker 2: he likes to spend that money. But it wasn't he said, no, honestly,
Speaker 2: it was them. And dude, I tell you, Beverly Hills
Speaker 2: is not the place that I need to be because
Speaker 2: people there, like you see it on TV and movies
Speaker 2: and even video games. You're like, that's not real, and
Speaker 2: then you go then and you're like it is real.
Speaker 2: Like there was this chick sitting at a table doing
Speaker 2: her hair like kind of like making faces, and her
Speaker 2: friend is holding her phone for her off to the side,
Speaker 2: just clicking taking pictures for her. And it wasn't even
Speaker 2: their table that they were seated at. They went to
Speaker 2: this other spot just to get a better picture and
Speaker 2: then went back to their table. And I was like,
Speaker 2: cloud Chasers, what the fuck is happening right now? When
Speaker 2: we were getting ready to leave, a Rolls Royce suv
Speaker 2: pulled up and dropped people off. There was a lambo
Speaker 2: sitting in the front of the valet. I'm like, this
Speaker 2: is this is not my place? Yeah here, yeah, hey,
Speaker 2: where's mlka. I'm gonna start walking that way. You were
Speaker 2: even things out.
Speaker 3: You were eating there, and I was sitting at a
Speaker 3: fucking Texas roadhouse with this sixteen year old kid across
Speaker 3: from me wearing a bright ass green wig with some
Speaker 3: weird shorts and an apron on, and I was like,
Speaker 3: that's got to be a costume, right, Like that's got
Speaker 3: to be for a reason.
Speaker 4: You're staying at the same motel.
Speaker 3: I am, Yeah, it was a It was all literally
Speaker 3: just for attention, Like this person was decked out, this
Speaker 3: kid was decked out as weird as you can imagine,
Speaker 3: just for attention they were only already have. It was.
Speaker 3: It was so awkward. I'm all for freedom of expression,
Speaker 3: I really am. I am all for freedom of expression,
Speaker 3: but there are certain times when it looks and it
Speaker 3: feels like it is simply just because you want to
Speaker 3: get attention.
Speaker 4: It's attentions.
Speaker 2: He can behavior.
Speaker 4: They need that validation to live.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah. And lastly, about my trip was so like
Speaker 2: Dome stayed at the Shit's Creek Motel when he was
Speaker 2: in California. Uh, Stone stayed at a fucking motel six
Speaker 2: and fucking like Compton. And so my doctor is the
Speaker 2: one that made the hotel arrangements, and funny enough, so
Speaker 2: he picked a courtyard a courtyard Marriott. It's a three
Speaker 2: star hotel. I do not tell you this this courtyard.
Speaker 2: I would highly recommend it to anybody that's going to
Speaker 2: that area. I stayed in a four star hotel in
Speaker 2: Chicago in October and it was not as good as
Speaker 2: this courtyard, Maryo. I was, yeah, like this courtyard should
Speaker 2: have been a four star in my opinion versus where
Speaker 2: I stayed in Chicago. That was like a more of
Speaker 2: a three star experience based on what it was.
Speaker 3: What's crazy is it probably was a three star because
Speaker 3: of the location and because the assumption of what a
Speaker 3: five star should be is higher in that location that
Speaker 3: you were at. So in reality, that three star probably
Speaker 3: was more like four to four and a half to
Speaker 3: someone like us on a normal basis.
Speaker 2: Well, the weird part is right across the street is
Speaker 2: the JW. Marriott, So you have the Marriott Courtyard and
Speaker 2: then literally across the street is the Marriott, and that's
Speaker 2: the four star hotel. So but when you walk in there,
Speaker 2: you're like, this is pretty. It's not five star, but yeah,
Speaker 2: but it was nice. I highly recommend that courtyard in
Speaker 2: La by the downtown La. It was. It was good,
Speaker 2: good ship. So and lastly I sent a picture dome.
Speaker 2: There was a waiter. I had one day that was
Speaker 2: one hundred percent Dana Carvey and Stuart from Mad TV
Speaker 2: that had a baby and turned gay. This was him
Speaker 2: thousand percent. But he was a great server, super super attentative,
Speaker 2: you know, because we were all dudes. So but yeah,
Speaker 2: back to hockey. You know, we missed the boat Dad's
Speaker 2: on day quotes back and one of the staples that
Speaker 2: we had was the the National Hula Hoop League, and
Speaker 2: that's where we are going to go through the NHL
Speaker 2: bracket and we're gonna, you know, we're gonna pick how
Speaker 2: do we want to do this? Do you want to
Speaker 2: do just the first round?
Speaker 4: Dome?
Speaker 2: Do you think we should do to the first round
Speaker 2: or just do the whole bracket right now?
Speaker 3: Crank it out, let's do Let's do the first two
Speaker 3: rounds because the first round two rounds kind of almost
Speaker 3: over already, right right right right, and then and then
Speaker 3: so let's do the first.
Speaker 2: No spoilers, no spoilers, because I told Stone not to
Speaker 2: look anything up. He's probably seen some stuff, but I
Speaker 2: just looked.
Speaker 4: Up the matchups. I didn't see who's winning or.
Speaker 2: Any Okay, perfect, perfect, perfect, So we'll go through the
Speaker 2: first round matchup. Let's start on. Let's start on the
Speaker 2: East or West Coast dome. You pick East, all right,
Speaker 2: We're starting on the East coast. So you got the
Speaker 2: Toronto maple Leafs and the Ottawa Senators dome. Who do
Speaker 2: you got?
Speaker 4: So?
Speaker 3: I actually had Toronto coming out of the first round
Speaker 3: this year. I think that Toronto is gonna break the
Speaker 3: ever so elusive slump. I think they're a good, well
Speaker 3: rounded team this year that can actually do it and eventually,
Speaker 3: like the losing streak has to stop, right.
Speaker 2: You think, you think? But uh Stone, who you got?
Speaker 2: You got? It's it's all Canadian matchups, So we're guaranteeing
Speaker 2: that a Canadian team's gonna move on to the second round.
Speaker 2: Who do you got?
Speaker 4: Who is the Senators and the maple Leaves? Is that right?
Speaker 2: That's right?
Speaker 3: That's right.
Speaker 4: Let me read this little excerpt I thought of the
Speaker 4: Senators went out for an extravagant lunch, not under the
Speaker 4: watch of doge hookers, cocaine poppers. They were all flowing
Speaker 4: and funneling into this debauched love sex dungeon feast. Suddenly
Speaker 4: someone bursts out the un jemima to lather on the
Speaker 4: ladies of the night. When the senators all said, let's
Speaker 4: take a shot together. First, they toasted their insides got
Speaker 4: roasted for it was not maple syrup but poison. Such
Speaker 4: a shame that all the senators died before Doge could
Speaker 4: reveal their nine hundred mistresses, all being paid under the
Speaker 4: table on the salary of the Education Department's budget. Win.
Speaker 2: I love it. It's it is a shout out Tanjemima.
Speaker 2: I miss your fat ass because it ain't Miima anymore.
Speaker 2: It's like something Mills, something I don't know, like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I want to say General Mills, but that's not correct obviously, serial.
Speaker 2: But anyway, I'm gonna go Maple Leafs. I actually in
Speaker 2: my bracket ie the Maple Leafs losing in the Eastern
Speaker 2: Final this year. I had a little bit more faith
Speaker 2: than I probably should have. Next match up, Tampa Bay,
Speaker 2: We're going off first? Was all Canada seconds, all Florida.
Speaker 2: Holy shit, Tampa Bay Lightning. Florida Panthers defending Stanley Cup
Speaker 2: champions in the Hulu Hoop League. Who you got stoned?
Speaker 2: Let's go with you, Florida Panthers, Tampa Bay Lightning.
Speaker 4: Let's see, he said, the Panthers and Lightning is that right,
Speaker 4: all right, Zeus fucking Zeus. It's always him. It's always
Speaker 4: him looking to fuck somebody, just looking at fuck and fuck.
Speaker 4: And then one day he went out and was like,
Speaker 4: you know, I need a fuck more of the cat family.
Speaker 2: That's sick.
Speaker 3: Fuck.
Speaker 4: He says, they need to bag me a panther. He
Speaker 4: goes out in searches and searches and searches, he can't
Speaker 4: find one, and then he ended up finding one and
Speaker 4: just bagging it, tagging the shit out of this thing.
Speaker 4: It looked like it was having a little too much
Speaker 4: fun for his pleasure, at least because he's a sick fuck.
Speaker 4: And then it says, gotcha, I'm the cougar, and Zeus
Speaker 4: was like, what, You're supposed to be a panther. The
Speaker 4: cougar was like, yeah, check out this powdered sugar right
Speaker 4: in zus space.
Speaker 2: It's my coke.
Speaker 3: Smell funny.
Speaker 4: This coke smell funny, and Zeus fell panthers one, Wow,
Speaker 4: goddamn wow.
Speaker 2: Okay, Stone's got the Stanley Cup, defending Stanley Cup champions.
Speaker 2: Moving on dome, Who do you got panthers? Lightning?
Speaker 3: I actually think that I think that Tampa Bay is
Speaker 3: lucky to have the record that they have this year.
Speaker 3: I think they're overrated and I like Florida to go
Speaker 3: relatively deep and.
Speaker 2: So yes what she said, Yeah, I actually one hundred
Speaker 2: percent agree with that take. I think Tampa Bay is
Speaker 2: living off of glory days of just a couple of
Speaker 2: years ago, and it's their last hurrah before the team collapses.
Speaker 2: Ye completely, And I also have the Panthers winning and
Speaker 2: moving on the next matchup in the East, the Washington
Speaker 2: Capitals versus the Montreal Canadians. So you have the record
Speaker 2: setting Alexander Ovechkin. He has beat Wayne Gretzky's goal record
Speaker 2: this year. He's also still scoring in the fucking playoffs,
Speaker 2: as if the goal record just was gonna stop. He's
Speaker 2: just a machine. And they're playing the Montreal Canadians. Who
Speaker 2: are you know, still hoping it was nineteen seventy eight
Speaker 2: all over again. Uh, dumb, who do you got?
Speaker 3: I actually wanted the Canadians to upset in this one,
Speaker 3: just simply there was a gut feeling there, dum that
Speaker 3: said the Canadians were going to figure it out, and
Speaker 3: that you know, Washington was gonna get caught off guard
Speaker 3: because Washington's the better team, right of course, I mean
Speaker 3: Washington's the better team. But I there was something in
Speaker 3: me that was like, you know what, if ever, if
Speaker 3: ever there was one, there's there's only two upsets that
Speaker 3: I kind of thought could happen here in these playoffs,
Speaker 3: and this was one of them. I kind of like Canadians.
Speaker 3: But okay, that was that was my honest pick.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'll explain that in a second. Stone.
Speaker 4: So we got the capitalists.
Speaker 2: You have the red, white and blue of America versus
Speaker 2: the red, white and blue of French Canada.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so we.
Speaker 4: Had Trump go over to the border and Trump was like, hey,
Speaker 4: I want to buy it all.
Speaker 3: It's good, it's great, I want to buy it all.
Speaker 4: Canada was like, no, you can't buy it. Well, actually
Speaker 4: you can buy it under one condition. If you take it,
Speaker 4: you have got to take that whole Blake Lavely drama
Speaker 4: out of Canada and just completely take it into the US.
Speaker 4: And Trump was like fucking bombam, Like who gives this shit?
Speaker 4: And yeah, so that was that was it. Her Brian
Speaker 4: Reynolds and play clebly drama and just bombed the ship
Speaker 4: out of Canada and took it. Anyways, after it was scored.
Speaker 4: Sure if you know capitalists, move on. Cool love it.
Speaker 2: The Eastern, the whole Eastern side of things has completely
Speaker 2: crazy matchups. First matchup was the two Canadians. Second matchup
Speaker 2: both Florida teams that matchup. Both are red, White and blue. Right.
Speaker 2: And then the last matchup here Carolina Hurricanes Red and
Speaker 2: black versus New Jersey Devils Red and black. Holy shit, stone,
Speaker 2: let's go with you, Carolina Hurricanes, New Jersey Devils.
Speaker 3: Who were you taking?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, Washington, Okay. I have Washington going all the
Speaker 2: way to the Cup this year. I don't have them winning,
Speaker 2: but I have them in the Cup. So Washington all
Speaker 2: the way, Carolina and New Jersey stoned.
Speaker 4: This is the Hurricane and the Devils, that's right, Yeah,
Speaker 4: fucking Hurricanes out there, dude, bunch of assholes, just leveling
Speaker 4: out the most beautiful parks of America there could possibly be,
Speaker 4: and other shitholes in like Indonesia and whatnot. But nobody
Speaker 4: cares about that. Everybody cares about America.
Speaker 3: Baby.
Speaker 4: But you know what, something was coming for that hurricane.
Speaker 4: It came back from another assault, and the majestic nature
Speaker 4: a devil came out and had a very mischievous plan.
Speaker 4: Devil took out a box of dildos and threw it
Speaker 4: up the hurricane, and the hurricane just whipped that box
Speaker 4: of dildos and all of a sudden it was just
Speaker 4: engulfed and a massive dildos. The other hurricanes pointed at
Speaker 4: it and said.
Speaker 3: Fagot, fagot, fagot.
Speaker 4: You know, and the hurricane cries and withdrawals from the campaign,
Speaker 4: and Devils take it amazing.
Speaker 2: I don't Ca or New Jersey.
Speaker 3: So this was the other upset for me. Right, Carolina
Speaker 3: is a better team. We know they're the beat team,
Speaker 3: but it was another one of those moments like and
Speaker 3: I could have been thinking with my heart right because
Speaker 3: it's the Devils, and I am a Devil's fan, but
Speaker 3: there was something that was like, you know what, if
Speaker 3: anybody's gonna beat Carolina, this is the team to do it,
Speaker 3: this is the moment to do it. This is like
Speaker 3: it's the first round, this is when it's gonna happen.
Speaker 3: I had the Devils losing next round, but I did.
Speaker 3: I did originally pick the Devils to beat Carolina in
Speaker 3: this first round, so I thought that they could get
Speaker 3: it done. I thought that they're I thought that their
Speaker 3: offense was gonna be strong enough and their defense was
Speaker 3: gonna play hard enough.
Speaker 2: But yeah, and this is where you know domes a
Speaker 2: man of his word, because the he picked the Canadians
Speaker 2: who were down three to one in their series, and
Speaker 2: he picked the Devils who have already lost their series
Speaker 2: four to one. As of tonight, they they're out of
Speaker 2: the playoffs. So yeah, salutations New Jersey.
Speaker 4: Let's go.
Speaker 2: Let's go to the West here. First matchup the President's
Speaker 2: Trophy winner, the number one team in the NHL during
Speaker 2: the regular season, so quietly so that nobody even knew
Speaker 2: they were the number one team, the Winnipeg Jets and
Speaker 2: the Saint Louis Blues. Saint Louis Blues's hottest team in
Speaker 2: hockey since the four Nations faceoffs. Number one seed verse
Speaker 2: number eight seed stone, let's go with you, Winnipeg versus
Speaker 2: Saint Louis. That would be the Jets versus the Blues.
Speaker 4: So the Blues spent another year trying to convince the
Speaker 4: nation that they were a legitimate hockey team, but the
Speaker 4: NHL just kept coming back and was like, get that's
Speaker 4: your fucking logos, Blue note Wings. Wow, Wow, Blue not Wings.
Speaker 4: We can't get something better than this fucking piece of shit,
Speaker 4: such a terrible We're gonna have to get it to
Speaker 4: fucking Winnipeg, the goddamn team who is named after an
Speaker 4: act that you probably get from lou a fantasy team
Speaker 4: over with your wife the Winnipeg Great job, congratulations, you
Speaker 4: won a peg. Wow, But you know what, We're gonna
Speaker 4: go with them over you because you know so Yeah,
Speaker 4: the Jets take it goad sad day.
Speaker 3: Dumb Saint Louis. Saint Louis, like Saint Louis is an
Speaker 3: underrated team, like and and it's weird to say that
Speaker 3: Saint Louis is an underrated team because, like you said,
Speaker 3: they are the hottest team since the break. However, people
Speaker 3: were still counting them out. People were still saying, well,
Speaker 3: they're the ease of schedule. They played a bunch of
Speaker 3: people who were hurt and didn't have their full rosters.
Speaker 3: Give fucked. They still won, and they won convincingly. They
Speaker 3: won a lot of games, very convincingly. And so I like,
Speaker 3: I actually like Saint Louis a lot.
Speaker 2: I picked Saint Louis and seven solely because I connor hollibook.
Speaker 2: Is that good of a goalie, yep. And then I
Speaker 2: think on his back, Winnipeg could win the series obviously,
Speaker 2: but obviously that could win three games if they lose
Speaker 2: the series. So yeah, but I do have the Blues
Speaker 2: moving on. I just the President's Trophy seems to have
Speaker 2: a curse that those teams typically don't make it out
Speaker 2: of the first round or for sure the second round
Speaker 2: that year. They just gas out and they end up
Speaker 2: facing a hot team usually, so and that's that's what's happening,
Speaker 2: and that's what's happening. That series is two to two
Speaker 2: right now. Next matchup, debt go ahead.
Speaker 3: It will it will go seven?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I think so. I think so. You know
Speaker 2: what's really funny about that matchup though, This is what
Speaker 2: I find comical. Winnipeg is in Canada. Their starting goaltender
Speaker 2: is the goaltender for the USA Hockey team from the
Speaker 2: Four Nations face off. Yeah, the Saint Louis Blues are
Speaker 2: an American team and their goaltender is the starting Canadian
Speaker 2: goaltender from the Four Nations face off. So that's comical
Speaker 2: to me. That's good stuff. Fuck Canada, by the way,
Speaker 2: next matchup you have Dallas Stars and you have the
Speaker 2: Colorado Avalanche.
Speaker 4: Don't.
Speaker 2: Let's go with your take first, Dallas Stars Coloradovans arguably
Speaker 2: the arguably the hardest first round matchup.
Speaker 3: Yes, in my opinion, I hate to see this like
Speaker 3: I love to see the matchup because I feel like
Speaker 3: we both win to cut this. Yep. These these two teams,
Speaker 3: there's arguments on both sides for either team to win everything.
Speaker 2: And the craziest part is one of them will not
Speaker 2: make it out of the first round. Correct, both could
Speaker 2: win the Cup and one can't make it to the
Speaker 2: second round.
Speaker 3: Yep. And and the fact that they are in this
Speaker 3: like crazy blood bath of a fucking fight, and then
Speaker 3: they're gonna have to go play somebody else who is
Speaker 3: tough right back to back. It's it sucks to see
Speaker 3: it happen. And I really wish that the playoff picture
Speaker 3: was structured differently this year because I would have rather
Speaker 3: them seen them on the West Coast in the West Final.
Speaker 3: But it is what it is, and I actually think
Speaker 3: that Dallas comes out on this one. I think Dallas
Speaker 3: is too deep.
Speaker 2: Big d baby s don't Stars, Dallas Stars, Colorado Avalanche.
Speaker 4: So we all know the Stars really is just a
Speaker 4: team full of the beautiful ladies who went on the
Speaker 4: space trip a few weeks ago. The astronauts is some
Speaker 4: would call them. The Ladies, decided to go to the
Speaker 4: Aspen Mountains for the winter vacation and celebrate their newfound astronautism,
Speaker 4: whatever the fuck that is. They went skiing naked as
Speaker 4: a stunt to boost their popularity even more, but then
Speaker 4: an avalanche took them all out. Now there's just a
Speaker 4: snow covered wasteland on the mountain. The only way to
Speaker 4: find the ladies is by spotting their nipples poking out
Speaker 4: of the snow. It's like finding mushrooms along the forest floor,
Speaker 4: you know.
Speaker 2: Blunch take it, okay, cool. I don't disagree with the pick.
Speaker 2: I like it. I do disagree with it. I'm sorry,
Speaker 2: but I do like the pick. I have the Stars
Speaker 2: little lone fact. I actually have the Stars winning the
Speaker 2: Stanley Cup this year. So I just think they're this crazy.
Speaker 2: They have a crazy good team and their goaltending is
Speaker 2: good enough, and if they can get out of the
Speaker 2: first round, you arguably have the easiest matchup in the
Speaker 2: second round, because they would draw either Winnipeg or Saint
Speaker 2: Louis and I feel like neither one's a good matchup
Speaker 2: for Dallas or Colorado for that matter. Versus, if you
Speaker 2: come out of that round, you could have to face
Speaker 2: the Golden Knights, and you know, so, yeah, that's the
Speaker 2: next matchup we're gonna go to. You have Vegas Golden
Speaker 2: Knights and Minnesota Wild Stone, your hometown team versus you're
Speaker 2: a past kind of home not hometown but home state team.
Speaker 2: Where you got where's your blood laying? Let's hear it.
Speaker 4: So the Lady of the wild said, you there, fuzzy Bear,
Speaker 4: you've done well this year in the forest. Go blow
Speaker 4: off some steam in Vegas. Put it all on red.
Speaker 4: I don't give a shit, You've earned it. The bear
Speaker 4: traveled all the way to the Las Vegas Strip, where
Speaker 4: somebody said, oh my god, it's a fucking bear, and
Speaker 4: the bear was chased all the way around the strip
Speaker 4: until it was cornered on the Fremont Street Experience. The
Speaker 4: police came out to see what all the fuss was about,
Speaker 4: and then the cop said, holy shit, it's black and
Speaker 4: shot it to hell. As the poor bear laid dying
Speaker 4: on the Fremont Street Experience next to a half empty
Speaker 4: fat Tuesday and a used condom. Golden Knight walked by
Speaker 4: and said, I remember my first time in Vegas nights
Speaker 4: when see it's.
Speaker 2: Actually really well done. I like that one. I'm not
Speaker 2: gonna agree with it, but I like it.
Speaker 3: I don't so at everybody in the in the playoffs,
Speaker 3: the Wild have the worst goal for goal against ratio
Speaker 3: mm hmm, and it's not even close. When you look
Speaker 3: at that, you say, there's no reason this team should
Speaker 3: be hanging around, right, But the problem is is that
Speaker 3: they're good.
Speaker 2: And they have arguably one of the top top first
Speaker 2: lines in hockey, yes, like a quietly one of the
Speaker 2: top first lines in hockey.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yep. And so I think that they sneak this out.
Speaker 3: It's gonna come down. It's gonna it, really And I
Speaker 3: picked them to begin with. I picked the Wild, picked
Speaker 3: the Wild in seven. And I don't think that that
Speaker 3: like some people can are gonna say that that's a
Speaker 3: hot take, that that the Knights should win whatever, I
Speaker 3: don't think it's I don't think it's that controversial. I
Speaker 3: do think that the Wild are a good team. Yeah,
Speaker 3: So I think I think they pull it out in seven.
Speaker 3: I think they lose Crown, but I think they pull
Speaker 3: it out. In seven.
Speaker 2: I went with I was already wrong. I went with
Speaker 2: Vegas and five I thought they were gonna I thought
Speaker 2: this is gonna be the one one of the steamroll
Speaker 2: matchups of the first round. Also, nobody's talking about Vegas
Speaker 2: because you have the Colorado Dallas matchup, and then you
Speaker 2: also have the Kings and Oilers for the fourth straight
Speaker 2: year matched up against each other, and so you have
Speaker 2: all this talk and nobody's talking about Vegas. But then
Speaker 2: all of a sudden, Minnesota is holding their own. Vegas
Speaker 2: steam rolls them in the first game, but Minnesota turns
Speaker 2: right back around and slaps them in the face and uh,
Speaker 2: and then goes up two to one on them, and
Speaker 2: then the gold Knights win in overtime to make it
Speaker 2: two to two in the series. He easily been three
Speaker 2: to one and they're in overtime again to night. It's
Speaker 2: a great matchup of a series, and I will say
Speaker 2: that I've been It's been one of my favorite first
Speaker 2: round matchups so far to watch. Agreed, So last matchup
Speaker 2: first round, as stated La King's Edmonton Oilers stoned, Let's.
Speaker 3: Go with you.
Speaker 2: La King's Edmonton oilers.
Speaker 4: A king received an invitation to go to a bowling
Speaker 4: alley with a nearby oiler. The king said, man, fuck it,
Speaker 4: I could get out of this shithole and away from
Speaker 4: this fucking nag and queen?
Speaker 3: Am I right? I hope she didn't hear me.
Speaker 4: He snuck out to a nearby bowling alley, found it empty.
Speaker 4: Then a man walked out from the back and said,
Speaker 4: would you like a milkshake? The king said, sure, you
Speaker 4: know it's my cheat day? Why not? The oiler came
Speaker 4: into you and the king noticed the oiler had a big,
Speaker 4: painous bulge coming out as he got closer weird and
Speaker 4: he said, I wonder if I could drink your milkshake.
Speaker 4: King said, well, we could each have our own. The
Speaker 4: man stopped right in front of him and said, but
Speaker 4: what if I want you to drink your milkshake and mine?
Speaker 4: Would you give it to me? The King was puzzled
Speaker 4: and said, uh no. Man said if that's rule applies,
Speaker 4: and why did you have no choice but to fuck
Speaker 4: my wife? Is it because she likes you better? I
Speaker 4: want you to drink your milkshake? And the oiler pulls out
Speaker 4: a big bowling pin from his pants and beats the
Speaker 4: shit out of the King Boilers win. Shout out to
Speaker 4: there will be blood.
Speaker 2: You know that's a it's an update. By the way,
Speaker 2: Vegas won in and overtime.
Speaker 4: Wow.
Speaker 2: While while that escapade was talking about the Kings and Oilers,
Speaker 2: funny enough about the Kings and Oilers. Actually, don't you
Speaker 2: say your pick and then I'll say my blurb about them?
Speaker 3: Fuck the Oilers Kings.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's what I would like as well. I don't
Speaker 2: like anything about the Oilers. I think Connor McDavid's a
Speaker 2: bitchy ass bitchy. Yeah, he is the greatest player in
Speaker 2: the world by far, like the most fucking prick, but
Speaker 2: he's a fucking cunts. A pie shot that fucking cunt anyway.
Speaker 2: Uh yeah, So the LA King should have swept that
Speaker 2: series in games three. In games four that they both
Speaker 2: lost to Edmonton, they were up by a goal inside
Speaker 2: of ten minutes and ended up losing in regulation and
Speaker 2: both I'm sorry, I believe last night they lost in overtime,
Speaker 2: but the other night Edmonton ties it and LA challenges
Speaker 2: the goal. They lose the challenge, which puts Edmonton on
Speaker 2: the power play. They score fifteen seconds in the power
Speaker 2: play and in a matter of fifteen seconds, a one
Speaker 2: goal lead turned into a one goal deficit. I was like,
Speaker 2: that's the problem with Edmonton. They strike quick and shrik fast,
Speaker 2: and they're about to win. Uh, they're about to win
Speaker 2: game with like two minutes left. So but I did
Speaker 2: have the Kings moving on to the next round.
Speaker 3: So that's that series isn't over though. The Kings can
Speaker 3: absolutely turn around and win the next two games. So
Speaker 3: even if they lose tonight.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So that's that's our that's our Hula Hoop up.
Speaker 2: National Hula Hoop League Update. We'll keep people posted. I've
Speaker 2: already spoiled my picks as far as who's the big ones,
Speaker 2: but we'll keep it going and we'll do it as
Speaker 2: we need to.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Hey, you guys know why six or thirty seven? Because
Speaker 2: seven eight nine? Motherfucker Mmm brought to.
Speaker 4: You by Jake.
Speaker 2: I thought that was brought to you by KFC.
Speaker 7: Oh, speaking of nybody, I want to talk about this
Speaker 7: gorilla fucking debate, dude, the hundred, the hundred men versus
Speaker 7: the fucking gorilla thing again.
Speaker 3: Because this is some bullshit, Dude, I keep fucking seeing it,
Speaker 3: and I'm telling you that the debate. The debate is
Speaker 3: once again that one hundred men versus one gorilla, who
Speaker 3: would win? Right? And everybody seems to think that humans
Speaker 3: are gonna fucking win. That humans human I.
Speaker 2: Take the gorilla every time.
Speaker 3: There's zero fucking chance that a hundred humans can defeat
Speaker 3: a fucking gorilla. I don't understand what people think when
Speaker 3: they think that a hundred humans can. We're talking to
Speaker 3: hear me out, bare hands. We're talking bare hands right here,
Speaker 3: the weapons.
Speaker 2: Hear me out. Hear me out. What if Magic Johnson
Speaker 2: was on one hundred people and during the scuffle he
Speaker 2: licked the bootyhole of the gorilla. The gorilla continues and
Speaker 2: kills all people. Gorilla wins, but then dies of aids.
Speaker 2: So who wins? You know, lost the fight all time
Speaker 2: because the strike happened before the gorilla won, So technically,
Speaker 2: ao humans they win, but it's a tie because Magic
Speaker 2: Johnson's got to be one hundred and we win this.
Speaker 3: But it's it's high. Magic is the best. The tie
Speaker 3: is the best you could do because all the humans
Speaker 3: are still going to be dead.
Speaker 2: Magic Johnson would fade away and be like Kobe.
Speaker 3: Maybe maybe he's he's an anomaly. Magic Johnson's is an anomaly.
Speaker 3: He should be dead by now. Do you remember when
Speaker 3: he like when he first when it first came out
Speaker 3: that he had it?
Speaker 2: Do you remember everybody else that's head aides, Yeah you
Speaker 2: mean except for him?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah, yeah, it's fucking wild.
Speaker 2: I don't know how I still run simulation.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So I came up with this segment, this next segment
Speaker 2: speaking to Kobe. Right, I was walking speaking of Kobe twice.
Speaker 2: I was walking past the Kobe and his daughter's statue
Speaker 2: in La which is cool wake statue and it's got
Speaker 2: wings embracing it and uh next to its shack looking
Speaker 2: like this, like all cross eyed and at the free
Speaker 2: throw line, staring staring it down. No, but I saw
Speaker 2: the Kobe thing and it made me think in a
Speaker 2: sinister way. I don't know why. Was what do you
Speaker 2: do you think that people have a random last thought
Speaker 2: right before the lights go out? Right? Like you have
Speaker 2: all this clarity, You have all this clarity, but then
Speaker 2: what if, like right before you go out, there's like
Speaker 2: one final thought and that's the that's your final thought
Speaker 2: before you go So I was like, that'd be fun.
Speaker 2: Let's list some celebrities, and I sent a list of
Speaker 2: celebrities to you guys, and so I want to hear
Speaker 2: what you guys came up with for their their last
Speaker 2: words that they thought of in their head before. I
Speaker 2: don't know if yeah, I want to know. So we're
Speaker 2: gonna go with the very first one, Stoned Euro up first, buddy,
Speaker 2: and we're gonna go with Kurt Cobain.
Speaker 4: Okay, Kurt Cobain. His last thought was, I wonder if
Speaker 4: Courtney's vagina is ever gonna smell better?
Speaker 3: What's bunny ist?
Speaker 2: I was like, purpose, My exact one for that was,
Speaker 2: I wonder, I wonder why Corny's pussy and mouth tastes
Speaker 2: exactly the same.
Speaker 3: Dome, but I actually had Courtney, don't pull that trigger.
Speaker 3: M last thoughts been off.
Speaker 2: I wonder if she knows this is loaded?
Speaker 3: Yeah, who the fuck is this bitch?
Speaker 4: I wonder if she's cheating at me at the black guys?
Speaker 4: I sorry, smoking Newports.
Speaker 2: Oh Man, speaking of black guys. Next one, Kobe Bryant,
Speaker 2: Go ahead, Dome, I should have taken the bush.
Speaker 4: Damn.
Speaker 2: Well that's on a cool c N hill.
Speaker 3: What do you got to do that one?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I got to go, Shack is a bitch, and
Speaker 4: I also got uh how about this for going out
Speaker 4: in the blaze of glory? Shack's probably gonna die some
Speaker 4: heart attacks like the fucking sage he is.
Speaker 2: Funny mine was. I wonder if Shackles ever make another
Speaker 2: free throw.
Speaker 3: He never even tried to get bad.
Speaker 4: Oh god, we should have did a Grand Canyon tour.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure I hit Mark clip so uh yeah,
Speaker 2: that one's going out there.
Speaker 3: It becomes viral.
Speaker 2: Oh, next up, John Wayne Stone, let's go with you.
Speaker 4: If they actually put an Asian to play the role
Speaker 4: of Genghis Kang, that'd be the death of cinema.
Speaker 2: Mm hm.
Speaker 3: Oh fuck. I had a hard time with this one
Speaker 3: because the only ones I could think of are ones
Speaker 3: that I can't say on here. I mean, I told
Speaker 3: you one, Gnome, so I'm I'm gonna say it. But
Speaker 3: all I could think of was Betty, I'm coming. I
Speaker 3: don't know why, like I'm coming like like I'm coming
Speaker 3: up there, Betty, I don't.
Speaker 2: Know why I got what you man, Yeah, Dad's not
Speaker 2: diquel though, you gotta gotta.
Speaker 3: I gotta clarify sometimes.
Speaker 2: Mine was, man, that red meat tastes kind of funny tonight.
Speaker 2: Oh think what was the story He died with five
Speaker 2: pounds of red meat in his stomach something like that.
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, uh, speaking of something in their stomach, Amy Winehouse,
Speaker 2: don't what do you got for? Amy Winehouse?
Speaker 3: Don't stop, I'm coming okay, Stone.
Speaker 4: I wonder if I could shove this bottle of jack
Speaker 4: up a man's ass before I drank it.
Speaker 3: Oh, she doesn't need to know that she did that.
Speaker 2: Damn mine was man. I should have went to rehab.
Speaker 4: I thought of that one too, and I was like, nas, nah,
Speaker 4: it's to one point.
Speaker 2: Next up, uh, speaking of low hanging fruit. Gene Hackman,
Speaker 2: fresh fresh on the kill list?
Speaker 8: Stone, who's this Asian bitch in my house? We'll actually
Speaker 8: following on the floor. Get your ass up? Are you
Speaker 8: my maid?
Speaker 2: Before Dome goes mine is uh. He looks at his
Speaker 2: wife and goes, hey, babe, how come our smoke detector
Speaker 2: and carbon dioxid lights off?
Speaker 3: Don't mind's god, damn it, we're the oreos.
Speaker 2: Man. I wish they would have made replacements too.
Speaker 3: It's so greatest.
Speaker 2: Next up, Bob saggot Our, our our homeboy, Bob Saggot Stone,
Speaker 2: what do you got.
Speaker 4: How did I get a girl that hot to be
Speaker 4: my wife?
Speaker 3: Jesus, I had a funk. I forgot to delete my
Speaker 3: browser history. Simple, simple, and accurate.
Speaker 2: I remember that time made me smell his fingers after
Speaker 2: his night with alanis More said pop right on the
Speaker 2: back of the head. You know that man didn't die
Speaker 2: of a heart attack. Can't bloom forest trauma to his head?
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, no, yeah no, talk.
Speaker 2: About talk about a story that is never resurfaced. How
Speaker 2: did that? How's that not talked about?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 2: Uh? Speaking of not talked about and killing themselves? Epstein, Epstein,
Speaker 2: he's next, What do you got?
Speaker 4: Uh do.
Speaker 3: Hey? Hillary? Bill said Monica was better?
Speaker 2: What do you got stone?
Speaker 4: Hey? Hillary Bill said, I fucking blow up dolls better.
Speaker 4: I'm just kidding. The Clinton should be arriving any moment.
Speaker 4: I'll get out of here soon.
Speaker 2: M oh my. Epstein final thought was man, low key,
Speaker 2: Hillary gave some good head.
Speaker 3: I bet you she's a freak. She's probably a lizard,
Speaker 3: she's probably a dominatrix, but she's.
Speaker 2: Just reptilian that does things to children. I'm probably not
Speaker 2: even gonna say it, but.
Speaker 3: It's bad for sure.
Speaker 2: She go to visit little.
Speaker 3: Mickey with the pappash with.
Speaker 2: Hi already getting the flash flash. Speaking of flask the
Speaker 2: Pope he made he made an appearance on Little Mickey,
Speaker 2: Don't what you got?
Speaker 3: Don't let that kid leave until I finish.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I had a kid one too. Hm, we got
Speaker 2: the stone?
Speaker 4: Looks like we all have kid ones. Uh, well, I'd
Speaker 4: be forgiven for touching them kids.
Speaker 3: No, no, no no.
Speaker 2: My final thought for the Pope was, I wonder if
Speaker 2: I was Muslim, if my seventy seven virgins would be
Speaker 2: little boys. And then he dies because he had pneumonia.
Speaker 2: So that was his last breath. He spent his last
Speaker 2: breath speaking Yeah, speaking of last breath in the end,
Speaker 2: it doesn't really matter. Chester Bennington, what do you got? Stone?
Speaker 4: That was kind of it? Does this even matter? If
Speaker 4: this is my end?
Speaker 2: Go ahead, dope, that's funny.
Speaker 3: I got. I think I'll just hang here for a while.
Speaker 2: Turns out they were just playing charades and he drew
Speaker 2: Chris Cornell.
Speaker 4: Oh shit, he took it a little too literally.
Speaker 2: Chest is turning blue? Do you think he can't figure
Speaker 2: this out?
Speaker 3: What is he?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 5: Man?
Speaker 2: Last one? Michael Jackson, don't.
Speaker 3: I wonder if anybody's figured it out? That I've bleached myself.
Speaker 4: He was obsessed with a joker in Batman comics. Yeah,
Speaker 4: he just had a fucking vath, fucking fad bleach. Mine's
Speaker 4: kind of similar to the pope. Will I be forgiven
Speaker 4: for getting away with diddling them kids?
Speaker 2: M m hm m m a mercy. I feel like
Speaker 2: his final thought was just and that's it and he
Speaker 2: went out.
Speaker 4: Another one I had was, uh, will the sperm donor
Speaker 4: ever reach out to the actual kids which are a
Speaker 4: paris blanket? And the other one?
Speaker 5: Hum hm, Okay, would you rather have your parent be
Speaker 5: if you were famous, die a famous death or go
Speaker 5: out quietly?
Speaker 2: Say that again? What like if you were famous? Right
Speaker 2: you want? Do you want your parent to have a
Speaker 2: famous death, like something that is highly remembered versus just
Speaker 2: going out quietly?
Speaker 4: What if highly remember it? As the cops walk in
Speaker 4: and find them o ding in the fucking hotel room
Speaker 4: while they're well, they're like strapped up and.
Speaker 3: Bail thirty inch dildo stuck in his ass or some shit.
Speaker 3: I see. That's like one of those like backwards genie wishes,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean? Like I want to have
Speaker 3: the world's biggest cock and really what happens is he
Speaker 3: makes everybody else's cock super small versus the same size.
Speaker 3: You ain't getting me today, motherfucker.
Speaker 4: Yeah no, how's the field? That's a field. You all
Speaker 4: to have half inch cuts?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 3: Yeah, wait, you got half inch needle, dick, I got
Speaker 3: I got one for you. Would you rather control water
Speaker 3: or fire?
Speaker 2: What do you mean by control? Like I can shoot
Speaker 2: it out of my hands, or I just control it.
Speaker 2: I mean I already control it. I control both. I
Speaker 2: want to start a fire. I can start a fire.
Speaker 2: If I want to turn on water, I can turn
Speaker 2: on water.
Speaker 3: Yeah. But you can't, Like you can't go up to
Speaker 3: a fire and grab it and control get it. I
Speaker 3: mean you can watch eventually, no balls, no balls, Bet
Speaker 3: you won't, bitch. You can't walk up to the ocean
Speaker 3: and part the fucking ocean like control? Control? Like full control?
Speaker 2: Okay, pull control.
Speaker 3: You can engulf yourself in flames, it'll never hurt you.
Speaker 3: You can engulf yourself in water, It'll never hurt you.
Speaker 3: You can control it water. I choose water, Yeah, same,
Speaker 3: Or you just use the water to put the fire out,
Speaker 3: so you technically win the battle. But but I would
Speaker 3: want to, I would literally want to go to the
Speaker 3: ocean and figure out what the fuck is down there.
Speaker 3: That's the only reason why.
Speaker 2: Here's your genuish. Sorry, the water won't kill you, but
Speaker 2: the pressure does.
Speaker 3: Yeah, well I would party, so I could just fucking
Speaker 3: fall five miles.
Speaker 2: You get right, you get right where you want to go,
Speaker 2: and you sneeze, which gods, you lose control.
Speaker 4: Dead.
Speaker 2: But here's here's here's a straight up stoner thought. If
Speaker 2: it were to crash on you, wouldn't you then automatically
Speaker 2: go to the top because the top of the water
Speaker 2: is hitting you.
Speaker 3: You would, well, you would. You would end up swirling
Speaker 3: and eventually you would equalize out somewhere.
Speaker 2: But you may I take that level.
Speaker 3: Because now you're thinking about swirling in trillions of gallons
Speaker 3: of water.
Speaker 2: No, no, stone, you got one.
Speaker 4: Would you, guys, rather be able to speak every language
Speaker 4: in the world or play every instrument flawlessly?
Speaker 2: Say the first one? Again?
Speaker 4: Be able to speak every language in the world.
Speaker 2: Language.
Speaker 3: Language, I don't really care about fucking playing instruments, but language.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna go with. I'm gonna go with language because
Speaker 4: it's it's easier to learn how to play an instrument
Speaker 4: than it is to learn a language.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, okay, all right, minds pretty simple. Would you
Speaker 2: either ship bricks or puke slugs? Puke slugs?
Speaker 4: How slugs?
Speaker 3: How big are the slugs? Just normal sized slugs?
Speaker 2: They're like the ones from Harry Potter. Yeah, it's it's
Speaker 2: like the size of your hand kind of. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I think I'd still choose that, like a brick size if.
Speaker 2: A dick size before your dick shrinks a dick sized slug.
Speaker 3: Oh, then definitely a slug.
Speaker 4: You just here from the bathroom.
Speaker 3: Porcelain.
Speaker 2: You broke another fucking toilet.
Speaker 1: Us.
Speaker 3: Sorry, I guess if my asshole, I guess if my
Speaker 3: asshole formed to the brick so it didn't like tear
Speaker 3: my insides and my anus, then actually I would probably
Speaker 3: take the brick because I already shit fucking arms. Anyway, boys,
Speaker 3: fucking minecraft.
Speaker 4: Goddamn, he just laid the foundation, you know what I mean?
Speaker 4: Took him half a year?
Speaker 3: Hm, I go with bricks, brick by brick, baby, break
Speaker 3: by bread, ship my own house.
Speaker 4: Would you rather visit the Great Wall of China or
Speaker 4: the Amazon River?
Speaker 3: What do you mean by what do you mean by visit?
Speaker 4: Like visit like play tourists?
Speaker 3: Uh, just folding in the cheese. Mean, what do you
Speaker 3: that's that's exactly what that?
Speaker 2: Do you mean? Wash the cards? What do you mean?
Speaker 4: Look at the sky?
Speaker 2: What I'm gonna go with the Great Wall?
Speaker 3: If I can explore the Amazon with no safely consequences.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I would choose Amazon as well, especially for like
Speaker 4: one of the ass Akra Maayan fucking cities and ship.
Speaker 3: Oh god, yeah, yeah that's okay.
Speaker 7: Uh.
Speaker 3: Would you rather live in a haunted house for a
Speaker 3: night or a prison for a night? Keep in mind
Speaker 3: you are not alone in either place.
Speaker 2: Haunted house, I'd rather, I'd rather, I'd rather be scared
Speaker 2: of a ghost can get fucked by tyrone.
Speaker 3: It's either an one night in a haunted house or
Speaker 3: one night in a prison.
Speaker 4: And you were a haunted house.
Speaker 3: You are not alone here, dude.
Speaker 4: Question We got last night footsteps again. I was sitting
Speaker 4: in bed just and I was like, it's every fucking
Speaker 4: awake right now. Open the door. Nobody there, God damn Grandma.
Speaker 4: Shut the door again. Went back to sleep.
Speaker 2: Uh would you would you rather accidentally send a dirty
Speaker 2: text to your boss or to your dad?
Speaker 4: Don't dad?
Speaker 2: Dom you can answer the A.
Speaker 3: I mean my dad.
Speaker 2: You don't get to cop out. You don't get to
Speaker 2: cop out with your dad. You have to choose your
Speaker 2: boss because you can't choose your dad.
Speaker 3: You know what, My boss is actually really cool and
Speaker 3: I could probably get away with it. She's she's pretty cool, okay,
Speaker 3: she she would. She would send me like a gift.
Speaker 3: She would send me like a confused gift, like did
Speaker 3: you mean to send this type thing?
Speaker 2: And then you're magnifying glass.
Speaker 4: My boss already thinks I'm weird as fuck, which no
Speaker 4: denying that. But her dad, that would that would push
Speaker 4: her over the edge. She'd be like, all right, I'm
Speaker 4: taking this stupid fuck to hr trying to get rid
Speaker 4: of his ass.
Speaker 2: We got dom, he got one more I do.
Speaker 3: Would you rather be allergic to sunlight or your own sweat?
Speaker 2: It's a tough one.
Speaker 3: Sunlight, Yeah, I'd have to agree with that. What was
Speaker 3: the other one, sunlight or your own sweat?
Speaker 4: Mm hmm, sunlight, Yeah, I agree. Would you rather have
Speaker 4: the world be rid of telephones or TVs?
Speaker 3: Telephones? No, yeah, t I have TVs. Actually it's TV's
Speaker 3: it's not that tough TVs. See you later, TVs. Because
Speaker 3: your telephone is like your your telephone is a TV nowadays, so.
Speaker 4: Well that would be a two. It would render the
Speaker 4: phones just phones again.
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I still I still say. I still say
Speaker 3: TVs because I'd rather have communication with two people that
Speaker 3: I care about.
Speaker 2: What you don't care about your third kid.
Speaker 3: I didn't say any of them were on that.
Speaker 2: Which which two are your favorite?
Speaker 3: I didn't say any of them were on that list.
Speaker 2: I choose to take the TVs away?
Speaker 3: Also, Yeah, it would It would suck if I couldn't
Speaker 3: talk to you fucking idiots on a regular basis.
Speaker 2: Wouldn't that be wild if you choose to take away phones?
Speaker 2: So like, you know where your friends live, but you
Speaker 2: can't talk to them unless you see them. So they
Speaker 2: could potentially move and you would never know.
Speaker 4: They could.
Speaker 2: Dude, like, I've lived here for a month and that
Speaker 2: person don't live here, Yeah, and you have no clue
Speaker 2: where they went. You never never see him again.
Speaker 3: How would you know? How would you know?
Speaker 2: If I'm changing my answer, how would you know?
Speaker 4: If it happened in my elementary school? That sounds quite familiar.
Speaker 4: Go see someone all of a sudden, someone else cendsor
Speaker 4: the door and you're like, hmm, all.
Speaker 2: These deportations are crazy deported here.
Speaker 3: Did you hear that he passed a fucking executive order
Speaker 3: that says all truck drivers have to uh have to
Speaker 3: pass a competency test. Uh for English. You have to
Speaker 3: you have to know English well enough to pass a test,
Speaker 3: and if you don't, it's like an immediate five thousand
Speaker 3: dollars fine for not passing the test, and then uh,
Speaker 3: if you can't pay the fine, then it's you get arrested.
Speaker 3: Hmm for truck For truck drivers.
Speaker 2: Well, you know there are a lot of Middle Eastern
Speaker 2: truck drivers a lot mm hm.
Speaker 3: Oh. I know. I worked at a truck stop and
Speaker 3: I also worked in somewhere where I had to get
Speaker 3: gas out of try ruck stop every two days. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 3: that's bad news, bad news bears.
Speaker 2: I mean, let's be real, like, I don't know. The
Speaker 2: way I've always thought about it is it's okay to
Speaker 2: speak other languages, but you should be able to be
Speaker 2: competent in the language of the country you choose to
Speaker 2: live in.
Speaker 4: Facts.
Speaker 2: I agree with that, and that's that's that's not an
Speaker 2: American racist thing. If I move somewhere, I would expect
Speaker 2: that I need to know their language competently enough to
Speaker 2: live and communicate.
Speaker 3: I agree. I agree with that to it. I agree
Speaker 3: with that to a degree. But then there there comes
Speaker 3: a point where it becomes discrimination, and it's also it's it.
Speaker 3: There's a fine line, dude, there's a super fine line.
Speaker 3: I I understand, I understand. I understand the argument from
Speaker 3: someone like you or a J or I where it's
Speaker 3: you know, I want I want somebody who's going to
Speaker 3: be on the road to be to be literate, right,
Speaker 3: and to understand what they're doing and you know, what
Speaker 3: they're saying to people on the road, be able to
Speaker 3: read the signs, understand the laws. I get that wholeheartedly.
Speaker 3: And to be able to speak to the people in
Speaker 3: which they are going to have to communicate too, throughout
Speaker 3: the entire trip of their like, of their entire career,
Speaker 3: right for every trip. I get. I get that wholeheartedly.
Speaker 3: But to arrest somebody because they can't speak the language,
Speaker 3: that's that's could be Borderman concentration camp. That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 3: That's borderline Germany, dude, borderline. So that's a tough one. Sketchy.
Speaker 2: I think I think it's it's it's supposed to try
Speaker 2: and force the way, because it's it's tough when you
Speaker 2: meet uh, people that actually do give a ship, that
Speaker 2: have come to this country and and force themselves to
Speaker 2: learn the language competently enough and actually want to become
Speaker 2: citizens of the country that they're in. Yeah, Like, isn't
Speaker 2: that the American dream? That you're coming here to be
Speaker 2: an American?
Speaker 3: Well, see, that's the that's the guy, you know. I mean,
Speaker 3: that's the guise of it, though most of it is
Speaker 3: is they're they're the American dream is to come to
Speaker 3: America to earn a shitload of money and be free
Speaker 3: from all of the oppression that they do have in
Speaker 3: their own country.
Speaker 2: And to do that just simply want to be an
Speaker 2: American because you want the lifestyle, you want to live it, right,
Speaker 2: That's all I'm saying. Yeah, salute your shorts, motherfucker. Episode
Speaker 2: one seventy three, What you got for us?
Speaker 1: Later?
Speaker 3: By kay? Hi, how are you uh A? What do
Speaker 3: spinach and anal sex have in common?
Speaker 2: What is the quidditch?
Speaker 3: What do spinach and anal sex have in common? If
Speaker 3: you were forced to have a as a child, chances
Speaker 3: are you don't like him as an adult.
Speaker 2: Oh I thought Popeye was the same quarrel.
Speaker 6: What