WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>All right, the nine news nuggets. You need to know.

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<v Speaker 2>These are stories that happened throughout the week. But we

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<v Speaker 2>were just too busy talking to Michael Monks and about

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<v Speaker 2>his sale of k Y that led to too much

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<v Speaker 2>junk food on his way to Los Angeles to pick

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<v Speaker 2>up his cat's hair and make candy.

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<v Speaker 1>So here we go, Honorable Mention. Honorable Mention not supposed

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<v Speaker 1>to mention the honor serving with you great and honorable motive.

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<v Speaker 1>So today we're holding auditions to become the newest member

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<v Speaker 1>of Honorable Mention.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh.

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<v Speaker 2>I love people acting a fool at a wake or

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<v Speaker 2>a funeral, or a rosary or any sort of celebration

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<v Speaker 2>of life. I love it when people act a fool,

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<v Speaker 2>specifically when those people have killed the person in the casket.

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<v Speaker 2>A teenagers tearful eulogy to her mother and stepfather of

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<v Speaker 2>help police charge her with their murder. Her name's oh no,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm sorry. Her name is Sarah. She's seventeen. She was

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<v Speaker 2>arrested in charged with murder this week. Her parents were

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<v Speaker 2>Kristen forty one, and her husband James Brock. He is

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<v Speaker 2>a stepdad, forty five years old. They were shot and

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<v Speaker 2>killed in their home in Carrollton, Georgia.

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<v Speaker 1>She was sixteen.

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<v Speaker 2>Sarah was when her mom and stepdad died, and they

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<v Speaker 2>say that mountains of physical and digital evidence led to

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<v Speaker 2>her being charged, including her eulogy at the funeral. Apparently,

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<v Speaker 2>people that watched Sarah eulogize her dead parents did not

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<v Speaker 2>buy it that there were no tears, there was no

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<v Speaker 2>psychopath trace of faked sadness.

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<v Speaker 1>There was just nothing there.

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<v Speaker 2>She In the footage, Sarah stands there on the stage

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<v Speaker 2>at Catalyst Church and her voice appears to crack from

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<v Speaker 2>emotion when she says, for those of you who don't

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<v Speaker 2>know me, my name is Sarah, and I am Kristen

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<v Speaker 2>Brock's daughter and James Brock's stepdaughter. She, by the way,

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<v Speaker 2>said she heard nothing when they were shot and killed

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<v Speaker 2>in their small home. She went on to say, this

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<v Speaker 2>isn't easy. I'm really happy to get to do this,

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<v Speaker 2>but just bear with me because I stutter a lot.

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<v Speaker 2>Probably any mention of you being happy about getting to

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<v Speaker 2>do a eulogy is misplaced.

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<v Speaker 1>In a eulogy, she said, I just wanted to.

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<v Speaker 2>Say goodbye to my mom and James since we never

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<v Speaker 2>got the chance to. I was so used to you

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<v Speaker 2>guys always being here. That I never thought that y'all

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<v Speaker 2>would not be here, and I didn't have a single

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<v Speaker 2>clue about how much I needed you all until now. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>ain't that the truth? Apparently her stepfather had a bad heart,

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<v Speaker 2>had like a heart machine, and she said, your heart

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<v Speaker 2>will finally be healed in heaven and you won't be

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<v Speaker 2>in pain anymore, and that gives me so much comfort.

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<v Speaker 1>Again, maybe you.

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<v Speaker 2>Want to leave it out, but she's only seventeen, you know. Anyway,

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<v Speaker 2>they said, be wary the people around her who saw

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<v Speaker 2>this and thought what a croc. They said that she's

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<v Speaker 2>seen as just this sweet little girl and that even

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<v Speaker 2>a monster can be a little girl in a dress.

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<v Speaker 1>Number nine. At number nine, I did ninth place. If

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<v Speaker 1>a cop to dirty nine times out of tennis partners

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<v Speaker 1>dirty two and I speak nine languages actual night, basically

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<v Speaker 1>everybody at table thening, I'll be all ready to go

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<v Speaker 1>another nine?

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<v Speaker 2>And Niner?

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<v Speaker 1>Did I get check Niner in there? Will you call him?

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<v Speaker 1>From alawakie talkie.

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<v Speaker 2>A missing surfer has been found alive on a remote

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<v Speaker 2>island about eight miles off shore. This is in New

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<v Speaker 2>South Wales, Australia. Is spent the night at sea on

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<v Speaker 2>his long board. He had been identified as Darcy Defaults.

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<v Speaker 2>That's a fun name, and yes, spent a night at

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<v Speaker 2>sea on his longboard. His bike, clothes and shoes were

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<v Speaker 2>discovered at a local spot. That he'd left his phone

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<v Speaker 2>in smart watch at the family home. But a night

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<v Speaker 2>on on the longboard. He apparently went out too far

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<v Speaker 2>couldn't get back. But he's in good spirits. He's being

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<v Speaker 2>supported by family. That doesn't sound so bad, does it?

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<v Speaker 2>A night on your longboard during the summer off of

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<v Speaker 2>the coast of Australia.

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<v Speaker 1>Sounds kind of peaceful, right, No one yammoring at you.

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<v Speaker 1>You're number eight.

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<v Speaker 3>Tid is bold every eight second listening to eight different

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<v Speaker 3>bosses drawn on about mission statements.

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<v Speaker 1>He uh, oh, you guys.

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<v Speaker 2>I just got a text message from the boss of

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<v Speaker 2>all bosses here, the president of iHeartMedia in Los Angeles,

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<v Speaker 2>who apparently listens to the show and says, it sounds

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<v Speaker 2>like you want me to suspend you. That's what happens

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<v Speaker 2>when you do the show on your own and you

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<v Speaker 2>feel like you're just talking to yourself in a padded

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<v Speaker 2>room for four hours every day. Apparently people listen. No

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<v Speaker 2>if you're still listening. I do not want to be suspended.

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<v Speaker 2>I like a paycheck. That was for jokes. That was

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<v Speaker 2>just jokes for us, all right. Number eight Two people

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<v Speaker 2>face multiple charges after they were caught allegedly trying to

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<v Speaker 2>have sex while driving a stolen RV. I have a

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<v Speaker 2>follow up? Was the sex while the car was in motion?

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<v Speaker 2>I think that's the follow up we all have upon

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<v Speaker 2>reading that headline. There was a patrolman attempted to pull

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<v Speaker 2>over a car after he saw.

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<v Speaker 1>A white RV.

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<v Speaker 2>According to the complaint, the officer saw a naked woman

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<v Speaker 2>straddling a man. This may get me that suspension, won't

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<v Speaker 2>it that. I'll just dial that back and we'll not

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<v Speaker 2>finish that sentence. Yes, the car was in motion, specifically

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<v Speaker 2>the RV. The RV came to a stop a half

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<v Speaker 2>mile after the officer turned his lights on.

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<v Speaker 1>Apparently, the man and the woman did the old.

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<v Speaker 2>Trick of changing sheet sheets and no seats while being

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<v Speaker 2>pulled over, and when asked what they were doing, the

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<v Speaker 2>man said, we were having sex.

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<v Speaker 1>So there is that illegal? Can you not do that?

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<v Speaker 2>Is this not America? Can you not have sex in

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<v Speaker 2>your vehicle?

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<v Speaker 1>What is this?

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<v Speaker 2>East Germany? If I buy myself an RV. I'm gonna

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<v Speaker 2>do what I want to do in my RV. I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, within within legal reason. But that's odd. Oh

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<v Speaker 2>I see one of them was drunk. One of them

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<v Speaker 2>was intoxicated. That's the problem.

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<v Speaker 1>Guys.

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<v Speaker 2>If you're gonna have sex in your RV, don't get

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<v Speaker 2>caught with a bottle behind the wheel.

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<v Speaker 1>Number seven, the seventh son of the seventh son. We're

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<v Speaker 1>on seven day with a government che seven seven a.

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<v Speaker 3>Seven years of college done to.

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<v Speaker 2>Drain seven seven days. I love it when people go

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<v Speaker 2>and seek advice from Reddit. You know it's gonna be

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<v Speaker 2>good if you've got to go to the Reddit community

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<v Speaker 2>to get back up on your life decisions. It's a

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<v Speaker 2>special type of advice, isn't it. There is a woman

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<v Speaker 2>doing adjust that she left her own birthday dinner once

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<v Speaker 2>her sister unexpectedly announced her engagement. This was a Reddit post,

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<v Speaker 2>like many do, that quickly sparked debate.

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<v Speaker 1>The woman she's twenty eight.

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<v Speaker 2>She says, my birthday was last weekend and just celebrate,

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<v Speaker 2>I planned a nice, low key dinner with is, my parents,

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<v Speaker 2>my partner, and my older sister Anna.

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<v Speaker 1>She explained that.

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<v Speaker 2>She loves her sister, but she has a history of

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<v Speaker 2>making big moments about her. It's been a running joke

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<v Speaker 2>in our family. It's always bothered me. At first, the

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<v Speaker 2>dinner goes smoothly. They're enjoying an evening. The waiter brings

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<v Speaker 2>out the birthday cake, and just as the waiter walks

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<v Speaker 2>toward the table with the cake, Anna stands up, clinks

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<v Speaker 2>her glass, and launches into a speech.

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<v Speaker 1>The speech ends.

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<v Speaker 2>With her flashing a brand new engagement ring and announcing

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<v Speaker 2>that her boyfriend had proposed earlier that evening. They say

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<v Speaker 2>the moment's done to everyone at the table. They immediately

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<v Speaker 2>erupted into tears. The waiter awkwardly places they cake down,

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<v Speaker 2>and it is quickly forgotten.

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<v Speaker 1>Amid all the excitement.

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<v Speaker 2>The rest of the dinner consumed by wedding plans blah blah, blah,

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<v Speaker 2>blah blah. The girl whose birthday it was says, I

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<v Speaker 2>told my partner I was not feeling well. I paid

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<v Speaker 2>my share of the bill and I left. She is furious,

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<v Speaker 2>and the sister who's got engaged is furious that the

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<v Speaker 2>other sister whose birthday it was it left, and she's

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<v Speaker 2>accusing her of ruining the special moment, her special engagement

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<v Speaker 2>moment with her pounding over her birth. And this is

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<v Speaker 2>why I'm thankful that I didn't meet my sister until

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<v Speaker 2>I was thirty nine years old. I didn't need a

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<v Speaker 2>whole life of this, of this just bickering over special occasions?

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<v Speaker 2>Is this what sisters do all the time? Come on, now,

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<v Speaker 2>you should both be happy for each other. There's two

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<v Speaker 2>special occasions. Number six.

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<v Speaker 1>I got six, You got six, she got six.

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<v Speaker 2>Number six, there's six more weeks of water way picture

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<v Speaker 2>of me a rabbi, and six drunk and longshore.

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<v Speaker 1>We just dig in a nursing home closer to us.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't have to drive down drink another six pack.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's see what we got here. There is a man

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<v Speaker 2>in Florida accused of stealing a novelty tourist train and

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<v Speaker 2>picking up bystanders on the fourth of July before being

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<v Speaker 2>arrested by Key West police. His name's Jonathan Winslow, fifty seven,

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<v Speaker 2>and he told police it's my birthday.

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<v Speaker 1>Now, what a fun day.

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<v Speaker 2>It's your birthday, You jack a tourist train and you

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<v Speaker 2>pick up strangers to join the party. Again, Is this

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<v Speaker 2>not America? Does that not sound like a nice day

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<v Speaker 2>of a way to celebrate your freedom of America and

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<v Speaker 2>on your birthday.

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<v Speaker 1>That's that's unfortunate.

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<v Speaker 2>He arrived at the depot, he left his Kia still

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<v Speaker 2>running and he took off with the train. Employees were

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<v Speaker 2>left confused. But what a fun day. Oh oh, here's

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<v Speaker 2>the problem. He was on meth. He had a meth

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<v Speaker 2>pipe in his pocket.

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<v Speaker 1>He was on the meth. He had the meth pipe.

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<v Speaker 1>He had the meth on his person. Yeah, you can't.

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<v Speaker 1>You can't do that. Number five for five.

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<v Speaker 2>I have five rules.

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<v Speaker 1>We begin bombing in five minutes. Five. This is the

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<v Speaker 1>year five point five. Give me a favorite, lose five

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<v Speaker 1>pounds immediately.

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<v Speaker 2>Would you know what the shape of your development is?

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<v Speaker 2>Your housing development?

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<v Speaker 1>Like? Would you know what it looks like overhead?

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<v Speaker 2>Maybe you do, maybe if you a house or something

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<v Speaker 2>like that, you kind of know where you're at in

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<v Speaker 2>your development, But would you recognize it being shaped as

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<v Speaker 2>a penis?

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<v Speaker 3>Like?

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<v Speaker 2>Who looks at an overhead shot of a housing development

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<v Speaker 2>and goes moak's like a penis?

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<v Speaker 1>I think there's something else going on there.

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<v Speaker 2>Residents have blasted plans for a new housing estate.

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<v Speaker 1>This is in the UK, and.

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<v Speaker 2>They say that the shape of the housing estate is

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<v Speaker 2>ridiculous that it looks like a penis. It's a two

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<v Speaker 2>hundred and fifty home development and local people do not

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<v Speaker 2>find this amusing. This has gotten the go ahead from

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<v Speaker 2>council planners, but people are up in arms about it.

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<v Speaker 2>Some say it's because it will remove more greenery from

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<v Speaker 2>the area, it will affect the wildlife. But others are

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<v Speaker 2>turning up to the council meetings demanding that they bulldoze

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<v Speaker 2>some of the houses because it looks like a penis.

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<v Speaker 2>Into which I say, if you're upset about the shape

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<v Speaker 2>of your house housing development, you have won life.

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<v Speaker 1>If that's what you're complaining about.

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<v Speaker 2>Number four four minute is probably on his fourth tranquilizer

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<v Speaker 2>by now.

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<v Speaker 1>Come number four.

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<v Speaker 3>This isn't the same world you left four years.

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<v Speaker 2>The world's most expensive cheese has sold. This is a

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<v Speaker 2>cheese made in Spain and it has sold for forty two,

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<v Speaker 2>two hundred and thirty two dollars. This Cabrales cheese was

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<v Speaker 2>aged in a cave for ten months, so it is old.

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<v Speaker 1>It is moldy. It is all the cheese things.

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<v Speaker 2>Who spent forty two thousand dollars on a piece of cheese,

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<v Speaker 2>five pounds cow's milk, five pounds of cheese for forty

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<v Speaker 2>two thousand dollars.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, number three free shall be the number that

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<v Speaker 1>house count and the number of the counting shall be three.

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<v Speaker 3>Fight were dead within three hours?

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<v Speaker 1>Three security clearance level three.

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<v Speaker 3>All three of three.

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<v Speaker 1>I got all three of you guys for the rest

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<v Speaker 1>of your na be born, live your back three days.

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<v Speaker 1>They both start to stink.

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<v Speaker 3>Three.

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<v Speaker 1>This is genius.

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<v Speaker 2>This is up there with Petros Papadacus referring to James

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<v Speaker 2>Bergener as sweet James.

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<v Speaker 1>This is brilliant advertising. Here.

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<v Speaker 2>There's a billboard that's gone up in Cleveland and it reads, yes,

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<v Speaker 2>I buy crackhouses. This has gotten a lot of criticism

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<v Speaker 2>across Cleveland. It's an out of state investor that put

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<v Speaker 2>these up. But what a great ad opportunity. Yes, I

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<v Speaker 2>buy crack houses. Is your house trash? I'll pay cash.

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<v Speaker 1>It's great.

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<v Speaker 2>John Williams is the guy. He is a self proclaimed

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<v Speaker 2>investor from out of state. And it is a high

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<v Speaker 2>visibility campaign and I think it's genius. How are you

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<v Speaker 2>gonna ever call anybody else than the crack house guy?

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<v Speaker 1>Number two? What's going on?

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<v Speaker 3>You two?

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<v Speaker 1>We got two fingers, there's two sons and no women

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<v Speaker 1>who ringing.

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<v Speaker 2>There is a twenty one second role that they say

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<v Speaker 2>scientists being that they hear everyone should follow while peeing

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<v Speaker 2>to stay healthy. Oh kay, it says according to research,

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<v Speaker 2>any mammal that's us who weighs over six point six pounds,

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<v Speaker 2>that's us, should need an average of twenty one seconds

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<v Speaker 2>to completely empty their bladder.

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<v Speaker 1>So that's the deal.

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<v Speaker 2>In order to determine this number, scientists filled their days

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<v Speaker 2>with watching clips of various mammals emptying their bladder in

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<v Speaker 2>order to gain an understanding about how long an animal

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<v Speaker 2>typically takes to pee. So they say, if a person

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<v Speaker 2>spends much longer than twenty one seconds peeing, it should

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<v Speaker 2>be a signed they're holding in urine for too long,

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<v Speaker 2>leading the bladder expanding more than it should. If your

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<v Speaker 2>peeing consists for longer or shorter, it could be a

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<v Speaker 2>underlying health issue. So who's going to count their next

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<v Speaker 2>p all of us, we'll all be thinking of each

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<v Speaker 2>other when we sit down and we start counting, second

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<v Speaker 2>by second altogether.

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<v Speaker 1>Number one weird, number one, Number one, we're number one.

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<v Speaker 1>Ben I decided to look out for number one. Are

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<v Speaker 1>you the number one, row number one, number one, number one.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's see lax to phil Adelphia. Let's see if I

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<v Speaker 3>can get on a flight to night not bad, non

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<v Speaker 3>stop on Frontier, about two hundred bucks.

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<v Speaker 2>Why do I want to go there? Well, that's why

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<v Speaker 2>we should all want to go there. There's a nude

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<v Speaker 2>bowling event in Pennsylvania tomorrow, the Pittsburgh Oh it's Pittsburgh,

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<v Speaker 2>not Pennsylvania, Pittsburgh area, naturally like I'm actually planning the flight.

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<v Speaker 2>The Pittsburgh area naturalists are hosting a nude bowling event tomorrow.

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<v Speaker 1>What is the name of the event?

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<v Speaker 2>Balls out to bowling. Eh, you do have to be

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<v Speaker 2>over eighteen kids. You don't have to be a good bowler,

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<v Speaker 2>but you do have to be nude. Thirty dollars, four

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<v Speaker 2>hours of unlimited bowling and shoe rental. Otherwise nude, it's required.

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<v Speaker 2>They do say women can choose to wear bottoms. How sweet.

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<v Speaker 2>There you have it. There's your weekend event.