WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>Mister Twizzleton's typewriter. Several strange things have happened to me

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<v Speaker 1>in my life that my friends could never account for.

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<v Speaker 1>They could never understand how I got an introduction to

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<v Speaker 1>Twizzleton q C. Nor why that learned a gentleman, after

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<v Speaker 1>allowing me to double his work for him for ten

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<v Speaker 1>years without putting anything in my way, suddenly use every

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<v Speaker 1>effort and influence he was capable of to put an

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<v Speaker 1>important and valuable junior practice in my hands. Twizzleton q c.

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<v Speaker 1>Was a hard, selfish man in person. He was like

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<v Speaker 1>a badly dried moth whose long, old fashioned whiskers resembled

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<v Speaker 1>the remains of wings. It was of him that it

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<v Speaker 1>was originally said that he was the living representative of

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<v Speaker 1>a tenant entail after possibility of issue extinct. And there

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<v Speaker 1>is consequently great surprise when Twizzleton married Lucy Travers, who,

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<v Speaker 1>as you will remember, was the belle of her season.

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<v Speaker 1>But the Travers were not so well off as they

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<v Speaker 1>pretended to be, and Twizzleton, as we all know, made

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<v Speaker 1>his fifteen thousand a year and had, if anything, an

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<v Speaker 1>ever increasing practice in the chancery division. Twistleton was undoubtedly

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<v Speaker 1>a great lawyer and a man of strong common sense,

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<v Speaker 1>but he had two fads. He was a believer in ghosts,

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<v Speaker 1>and he wrote everything in his chambers upon a Remington typewriter.

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<v Speaker 1>Twizzleton and his wife were staying one June in Norfolk

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<v Speaker 1>at Lady Barn Doors. Twizzleton was due in town to

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<v Speaker 1>argue the great patent case concerning sewing machines of Buncombe

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<v Speaker 1>and another versus Badger in the Court of Appeal on

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<v Speaker 1>Wednesday morning. I expected him back in chambers on the

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<v Speaker 1>Monday evening, understanding that he intended rejoining his wife at

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<v Speaker 1>the end of the week, for this case would last

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<v Speaker 1>at least three days, and Twizzleton was in several other

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<v Speaker 1>cases on the list. About eight o'clock on Monday evening,

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<v Speaker 1>I had dined early at my club and was engaged

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<v Speaker 1>noting up Twzzleton's papers when he came in with his

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<v Speaker 1>gladstone bag and rug, looking, as I thought, tired and

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<v Speaker 1>out of spirits. When Twizzleton was in town by himself,

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<v Speaker 1>he always slept at his own chambers, as in the

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<v Speaker 1>ol days before he was married, and his breakfast a

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<v Speaker 1>chop and two eggs, was sent in from the cock Twizzleton,

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<v Speaker 1>having heard what Foss his clerk had to stay on

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<v Speaker 1>the subject of retainers, dismissed him. Then he slammed down

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<v Speaker 1>the windows, which I had opened to let in what

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<v Speaker 1>fresher there was in old square, carefully closed the door,

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<v Speaker 1>let himself into the hard chair in front of his

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<v Speaker 1>writing table, and idly leaned over the papers which were

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<v Speaker 1>before him. At length, the outer door was heard to close,

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<v Speaker 1>Foss had departed, and Twizzleton broke silence. Penrose, my dear fellow,

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<v Speaker 1>I am uncomfortable. Twizzleton, I may here remark, was always

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<v Speaker 1>on the best of terms with me, and treated me

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<v Speaker 1>as a friend. For I believe I was useful to him.

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<v Speaker 1>I had made great way in his affections by solemnly

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<v Speaker 1>advising him to marry Missus Travers when I saw he

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<v Speaker 1>was bent on doing so. But since his marriage I

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<v Speaker 1>am not sure that this course of conduct of mine

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<v Speaker 1>had been altogether to my advantage. I looked to him

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<v Speaker 1>for a further explanation, which I saw was coming. Penrose,

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<v Speaker 1>my dear fellow, who do you think is at lady

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<v Speaker 1>barn Door's I shook my head, being entirely in ignorance.

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<v Speaker 1>Charlie Colston replied, Twizzleton trying to carve his whiskers with

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<v Speaker 1>a paper knife. Charlie Colston, Poor Charlie Colston. It was

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<v Speaker 1>well known that he had paid his addresses to pretty

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<v Speaker 1>missus Twizzleton in former days, and reports said she had

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<v Speaker 1>encouraged them. No wonder Twizleton was excited. I knew him

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<v Speaker 1>to be of an extremely jealous nature. Now mark me, Penrose,

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<v Speaker 1>said Twizzleton, shaking his forefinger at me as he would

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<v Speaker 1>at Lord Usher in the appeal court. What took place yesterday?

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<v Speaker 1>When I was playing tennis? The whole time, sir, he

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<v Speaker 1>and she were talking and chatting together and laughing, Yes,

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<v Speaker 1>laughing perhaps at my play, For I played abominably. I

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<v Speaker 1>know it. I could not bear to see them. Twizzleton's

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<v Speaker 1>tennis was never first rate. He had begun to play

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<v Speaker 1>too late in life. He was an annoying partner, as

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<v Speaker 1>he always insisted on leading, taking all the difficult strokes

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<v Speaker 1>and failing at them. He was a still more objectionable opponent,

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<v Speaker 1>as he was always taking technical objections on points of practice. Still,

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<v Speaker 1>however badly one plays, it is not pleasant to be

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<v Speaker 1>laughed at, even by one's wife. I tried to soothe Twizzleton,

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<v Speaker 1>but he interrupted me. Now there is another point I

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<v Speaker 1>desired to urge. Twiston always spoke as though he was

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<v Speaker 1>addressing the court of appeal. When I asked my wife

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<v Speaker 1>to come back to day, she point blank refused, what

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<v Speaker 1>do you think of that? Nothing whatever? I answered, she

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<v Speaker 1>had arranged to stay. And you are going down on

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<v Speaker 1>Saturday again. I think you are making mountains out of

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<v Speaker 1>mole hills. I hope I am penrose. I hope I am,

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<v Speaker 1>replied Twizzleton mournfully. But you didn't see them. I did,

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<v Speaker 1>and Twizzleton sighed deeply. Then the subject dropped and we

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<v Speaker 1>got to work on a small case. Soon Twizzleton, with

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<v Speaker 1>a self complacent smile on his countenance, was playing an

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<v Speaker 1>opinion on his typewriter. It was to him, I believe,

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<v Speaker 1>as though each note he struck produced a deep, mellow

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<v Speaker 1>tone and not a capital or small rooman. I can

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<v Speaker 1>remember when Twizzleton first had his typewriter. In those days,

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<v Speaker 1>he used to sit at it for hours, practicing hitting

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<v Speaker 1>first one note and then the other at intervals, varying

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<v Speaker 1>between ten seconds and two or three minutes. Every now

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<v Speaker 1>and then, using the most horrible language as you put

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<v Speaker 1>a capital for a small rooman or missed his space.

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<v Speaker 1>Then his efforts looked as though they were the productions

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<v Speaker 1>of six drunken printers who had each taken an absent

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<v Speaker 1>comrade's work for the day, and they were always copied

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<v Speaker 1>before they went to clients. Now the machine went click, click, click,

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<v Speaker 1>even lee and merrily. Twistleton was a perfect master of it.

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<v Speaker 1>I had seen him work it with his eyes shut.

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<v Speaker 1>I have no doubt that if he could have stood

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<v Speaker 1>on his head, and if it had been consonant with

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<v Speaker 1>the dignity of a Queen's counsul to do so, he

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<v Speaker 1>could have played his instrument in that posture. The opinion finished. Twizzleton,

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<v Speaker 1>who was a very methodical man, put a fresh sheet

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<v Speaker 1>of paper in readiness to commence again, folded and signed

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<v Speaker 1>what he had written, and bade me good night. His

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<v Speaker 1>last words to me were, I hope you are right

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<v Speaker 1>about Charlie Colston. I am sure of it, I said,

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<v Speaker 1>I wish I were. Tomorrow we were to have a

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<v Speaker 1>long day at Buncombe versus Badger. When I arrived in

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<v Speaker 1>the morning, Twizzleton was at breakfast. I no longer entered

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<v Speaker 1>than he set down his egg spoon, and, rushing at

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<v Speaker 1>me with a piece of paper, thrust it into my hands.

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<v Speaker 1>Read that he cried excitedly. Read that I noticed that

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<v Speaker 1>Twizzleton seemed done well. There was a wild look in

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<v Speaker 1>his eyes. His chop was untouched, A reversal of Twizzleton's

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<v Speaker 1>procedure at breakfast, which was more extraordinary to me than

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<v Speaker 1>his strange appearance. The egg he was eating was, to

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<v Speaker 1>anyone with a sense of smell, manifestly a bad one.

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<v Speaker 1>A most portentous fact to me, who remember hearing Twizzleton,

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<v Speaker 1>who never knew any criminal law, seriously tell the boy

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<v Speaker 1>from the cock that he believed the bill a tainer

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<v Speaker 1>would lie against him for bringing him a bad egg.

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<v Speaker 1>What did it all mean? I looked at the paper

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<v Speaker 1>in my hands. On it were two words, neatly printed,

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<v Speaker 1>Charlie Colston. I stared blankly at Twizzleton. What did it mean?

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<v Speaker 1>Twizzleton was shaking visibly. Do you believe in ghosts? He

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<v Speaker 1>asked anxiously. Certainly not, I replied, Ah, sighed Twizzleton, and

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<v Speaker 1>added sententiously, there are more things in heaven and Earth

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<v Speaker 1>than are dreamed of in your philosophy. This was the

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<v Speaker 1>only quotation I ever heard him utter that did not

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<v Speaker 1>come from the law reports. I believe he fancied it.

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<v Speaker 1>It was afraid he had invented in his early youth,

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<v Speaker 1>when he first began to believe in ghosts. If you

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<v Speaker 1>don't believe in ghosts? Who wrote that message on my typewriter?

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<v Speaker 1>Twizzleton's manner was very impressive. I felt like a witness

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<v Speaker 1>committing perjury. I tell you I found it this morning

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<v Speaker 1>when I want to write a letter just before breakfast.

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<v Speaker 1>Who wrote it? He shouted? Who wrote it? I will know?

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<v Speaker 1>Perhaps Foss, I suggested he has not been here and

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<v Speaker 1>can't use the typewriter. I had heard him say so,

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<v Speaker 1>but did not believe it. Foss was afraid of overworking

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<v Speaker 1>himself and so did not choose to learn it. But

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<v Speaker 1>any fool could use it if he liked to learn.

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<v Speaker 1>My opinion was that Foss could use it. He was

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<v Speaker 1>like the monkeys, who, as the negro said, could talk

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<v Speaker 1>if they would, but knew if they did, they would

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<v Speaker 1>be made to work. How about the laundress, I suggested, Ah,

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<v Speaker 1>the laundress, repeated Twizzleton, thoughtfully, the laundress, so, missus. Butcheck

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<v Speaker 1>the laundress was sent for when Foss came in, but

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<v Speaker 1>she denied all knowledge of the typewriter or the writing.

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<v Speaker 1>Making a new suggestion which did not to our thinking

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<v Speaker 1>much advanced the solution of the mystery, and that was

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<v Speaker 1>that the culprit was the cat. It is a message,

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<v Speaker 1>said Twizzleton, mysteriously. A message. Nonsense, I said, some fellow

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<v Speaker 1>has strolled in and written the name for fun. Fun,

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<v Speaker 1>cried Twistleton, indignantly fun, and then more quietly, No, I

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<v Speaker 1>am sure of it. It is a message. Very little

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<v Speaker 1>of Buncombe versus Badger could I get into Twizzleton's head

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<v Speaker 1>that day? Plans and specifications. He seemed not to understand

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<v Speaker 1>the seductive literary style of the Affidavit had no charm

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<v Speaker 1>for him. He could only gaze at the paper in

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<v Speaker 1>his hand and murmur, ever and anon a message. I

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<v Speaker 1>saw it was best to humor him, and at my suggestion,

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<v Speaker 1>the typewriter was locked up that night, and he took

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<v Speaker 1>the key with him into his bedroom. We had had

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<v Speaker 1>a rattling good dinner together, and when I left Twizzleton

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<v Speaker 1>he was in much better spirits. If the ghost comes tonight,

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<v Speaker 1>he won't be able to get at the typewriter anyhow,

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<v Speaker 1>I said, laughing, hush, I don't know, replied Twizzleton solemnly,

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<v Speaker 1>it is no jesting subject. I went my way, wondering

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<v Speaker 1>how a man with Twizleton's practice could believe in ghosts,

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<v Speaker 1>and who the deuce had written Charlie Colston's name on

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<v Speaker 1>the typewriter. The next morning I walked down the Twizzletons

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<v Speaker 1>directly after breakfast. I found him in the wildest imaginable condition.

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<v Speaker 1>He had taken every precaution, locking up the typewriter, placing

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<v Speaker 1>the key under his pillow, And yet here was the message,

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<v Speaker 1>as he called it, printed in clear, faultless style, Charlie Colston.

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<v Speaker 1>He is with your wife, Charlie Colston. I must go,

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<v Speaker 1>I must go, Oh Penrose, what shall I do? He

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<v Speaker 1>cried in agony as I entered the room, Go, I said,

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<v Speaker 1>And who was to lead in Buncombe versus Badger? He

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<v Speaker 1>was silent and buried all his face except his whiskers

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<v Speaker 1>in his hands. Even his hands, large and uncouth as

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<v Speaker 1>they were, could not contain his whiskers. Think of Ritzon

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<v Speaker 1>and claim, what will they say? I urged, Seeing the

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<v Speaker 1>effect that my words had on him. They rely on

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<v Speaker 1>you on this case. The name of this eminent firm

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<v Speaker 1>seemed to call Twizlton to some extent, my dear Penrose.

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<v Speaker 1>He said, in a trembling voice, this is a message.

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<v Speaker 1>I am sure of it. But I will do my duty.

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<v Speaker 1>I will stay by my clients. Twizzleton, you speak like

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<v Speaker 1>a queen's counsel and a man of honor, I said,

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<v Speaker 1>seizing him by the hand, proud to shake it. If

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<v Speaker 1>it is a message, I added, to humor him, it

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<v Speaker 1>will come again tonight. I will tell you what we

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<v Speaker 1>will do. We will watch the typewriter all night. Twizzleton

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<v Speaker 1>wrung my hand with gratitude at this suggestion of mine,

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<v Speaker 1>and called them. I made him eat some of his

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<v Speaker 1>cold chop, and sent for some brandy and water for

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<v Speaker 1>him instead of the tea, which had already stood in

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<v Speaker 1>the teapot for more than an hour. Then I endeavored

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<v Speaker 1>to coach him in Buncombe versus Badger, but with small success.

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<v Speaker 1>Then we went over to the appeal court, in which

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<v Speaker 1>I took my seat, for though I was not briefed

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<v Speaker 1>in the case, I had nothing else to do and

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<v Speaker 1>was interested in seeing how Twizzleton got on with it.

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<v Speaker 1>He was very able at picking up a case as

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<v Speaker 1>he went along, and the Court of Appeals stood greatly

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<v Speaker 1>in awe of him. I had never seen him as

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<v Speaker 1>nervous as he was to day, not even on his

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<v Speaker 1>wedding day, and I was quite frightened for him. Lord

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<v Speaker 1>Usher m R, supported by Smug l J and Summerbasch

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<v Speaker 1>l J, formed the court. Twizzleton came in late. He

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<v Speaker 1>had been at a consultation. As he entered, I heard

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<v Speaker 1>two solicitors clerks say to each other, who is that

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<v Speaker 1>with the whiskers? Twizzleton keys, he has the biggest practice

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<v Speaker 1>at the bar. He looks like a boiled owl, suggested

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<v Speaker 1>his companion Drinks, I believe was the reply. This was horrible,

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<v Speaker 1>for Twizzleton was a follower of Prebendary Faluten the great teetotaler.

225
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<v Speaker 1>But certainly Twizzleton had a dissipated look this morning. His

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<v Speaker 1>eyes were red, and the lines under his eyes were

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<v Speaker 1>very dark and hollow. His cheeks were pale and yellow.

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<v Speaker 1>Something of this kind I fancy, the master of the rolls,

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<v Speaker 1>remarked to Lord Justice Smug, who nodded a sent. Twizzleton

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<v Speaker 1>rose to open the case, which was a very intricate one,

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<v Speaker 1>and Lord Usher, according to his constant practice, interrupted him

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<v Speaker 1>with the regularity of a piece of clockwork every two

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<v Speaker 1>and a half minutes, and then wondered why he did

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<v Speaker 1>not understand the case, and shook himself impatiently. Much to

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<v Speaker 1>Lord Usher's astonishment, Twizzleton did not deliver any of those

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<v Speaker 1>stinging retorts by which he was wont to keep the

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00:15:06.879 --> 00:15:09.879
<v Speaker 1>Court of Appeal in order and frighten their lordships into

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<v Speaker 1>deciding in his favor. On noticing this, the Lord Usher

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<v Speaker 1>began to chaff and rally Twizzleton in a manner that

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<v Speaker 1>was the admiration of the junior bar, the two lords Justices,

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00:15:20.240 --> 00:15:22.000
<v Speaker 1>and not least of all, of the Master of the

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<v Speaker 1>Rolls himself. At length, Twizzleton, in expatiating on the merits

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<v Speaker 1>of Buncombe's sewing machine, alluded to it as a typewriter,

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00:15:32.759 --> 00:15:36.240
<v Speaker 1>whereupon Lord Usher said with a humorous leer, that if

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<v Speaker 1>it had been a question of typewriters, no doubt mister

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00:15:39.200 --> 00:15:42.200
<v Speaker 1>Twiztleton would have been called as a specialist to give evidence,

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<v Speaker 1>and would not have been arguing the case before them,

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00:15:46.039 --> 00:15:49.159
<v Speaker 1>at which those in the court who kneeled Twizzleton's fad tittered,

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<v Speaker 1>and his lordship's namesakes, who stand about the court, put

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00:15:52.399 --> 00:15:54.879
<v Speaker 1>their hands before their faces and shook visibly for a

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<v Speaker 1>moment or two, and then called out hush, and looked angry.

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<v Speaker 1>But Twizzleton lost his temper over this and asked his

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<v Speaker 1>lordship if his lordship meant to hint that the court

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<v Speaker 1>did not want to hear him, and intimated his intention

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<v Speaker 1>if such was a case of sitting down. And then

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<v Speaker 1>the whole court was really quite silent for a minute

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<v Speaker 1>or two in anticipation of a row, and everyone ceased

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<v Speaker 1>to fidget and paid close attention to Lord Usher to

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<v Speaker 1>hear him with his blandest and most urbano smiles, explaining,

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<v Speaker 1>how was the great privilege of that court to listen

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<v Speaker 1>to mister Twizzleton, and what a high value they said

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<v Speaker 1>upon that privilege, and how it was quite inconceivable to him,

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<v Speaker 1>Lord Usher, that he, mister Twizzleton, could imagine for a

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<v Speaker 1>moment that this court or any other court, should wish

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<v Speaker 1>him to sit down. Whereupon Twizzleton murmured that his lordship

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<v Speaker 1>was very good, meaning thereby that he should like to

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<v Speaker 1>be with his Lordship in a small room where he

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<v Speaker 1>could give him a bit of his mind. Then the

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<v Speaker 1>case proceeded quite regularly until Twizzleton handed Lord Usher a

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<v Speaker 1>lot of papers to explain his case. Lord Usher, coming

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<v Speaker 1>to one, said with a knowing aside glance at smug

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<v Speaker 1>lj that from the handwriting it must be a note

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<v Speaker 1>of mister Twistleton's in another case, as he did not

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<v Speaker 1>know that anyone of the name of Charles Colston was

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<v Speaker 1>a party to this case. And what would have happened then,

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00:17:15.839 --> 00:17:19.960
<v Speaker 1>I don't know. Only the court rose for lunch. I

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00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:22.799
<v Speaker 1>heard two or three people say that day that Twizzleton,

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00:17:22.880 --> 00:17:24.880
<v Speaker 1>poor fellow, was doing more work than he ought to,

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00:17:25.480 --> 00:17:28.319
<v Speaker 1>that Twizzleton was a clever fellow, but he could not

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<v Speaker 1>afford to burn the cannel at both ends. Indeed, Twizzleton's

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00:17:32.519 --> 00:17:35.720
<v Speaker 1>strange conduct in Buncombe versus Badger was a general topic

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<v Speaker 1>of conversation in the robing room. When Twizzleton came out

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00:17:40.519 --> 00:17:43.200
<v Speaker 1>of court, I had the greatest difficulty to prevent him

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<v Speaker 1>from rushing down the Norfolk by the night train. He

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<v Speaker 1>was sure it was true, he believed in the message.

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00:17:51.000 --> 00:17:53.519
<v Speaker 1>I calmed him down and we had dinner together at

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<v Speaker 1>my club. He had to continue his speech in the

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00:17:56.839 --> 00:18:00.400
<v Speaker 1>morning I tried to coach him a Buncombe versus Badger,

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00:18:00.480 --> 00:18:03.160
<v Speaker 1>but it was of no avail. I do not think

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00:18:03.200 --> 00:18:06.400
<v Speaker 1>he even knew for which side he was appearing. We

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00:18:06.480 --> 00:18:08.480
<v Speaker 1>agreed that we would sit up and watches, and so

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00:18:08.599 --> 00:18:12.200
<v Speaker 1>keep our eye on the typewriter all night. There was

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<v Speaker 1>a sofa in the recess of the window, and Twizzleton

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00:18:15.359 --> 00:18:18.799
<v Speaker 1>sent me to bed and placed himself on this. I

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00:18:18.799 --> 00:18:21.000
<v Speaker 1>bat him good night and took his bed for the

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00:18:21.039 --> 00:18:24.480
<v Speaker 1>first half of the night. About two o'clock in the morning,

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<v Speaker 1>I awoke and went to Twizzleton. He was wide awake,

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<v Speaker 1>reading some papers on the sofa. Have you seen anything,

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00:18:32.519 --> 00:18:38.839
<v Speaker 1>I asked, nothing whatever, He replied, nor heard anything, not

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<v Speaker 1>a sound. We took the lamp to the typewriter and

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00:18:42.839 --> 00:18:45.920
<v Speaker 1>opened it. There was a sheet of papers. He always

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00:18:46.000 --> 00:18:49.599
<v Speaker 1>left it untouched. Twizzleton locked it up again and took

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<v Speaker 1>the key. Put it under your pillow, I will, he replied.

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<v Speaker 1>It's very good of you to sit up like this.

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00:18:58.799 --> 00:19:03.680
<v Speaker 1>It's nothing at all. Assure you, I answered, keep strict watched,

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00:19:03.799 --> 00:19:10.079
<v Speaker 1>won't you? I promised you, I said. Twizzleton shook me

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<v Speaker 1>by the hand with emotion and went out. He looked

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<v Speaker 1>very ill and wretched, I thought, and was sorry for him.

309
00:19:17.359 --> 00:19:20.039
<v Speaker 1>Was it a ghost message or what that was making

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00:19:20.079 --> 00:19:23.519
<v Speaker 1>his life a burden to him? Should I solve the mystery? Tonight?

311
00:19:25.720 --> 00:19:28.680
<v Speaker 1>I waited about an hour and a half. The dawn

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00:19:28.799 --> 00:19:31.240
<v Speaker 1>came peeping through the painted shutters and made the lamp

313
00:19:31.279 --> 00:19:35.240
<v Speaker 1>look dim. I was almost dozing. In fact, I had

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00:19:35.279 --> 00:19:38.480
<v Speaker 1>shut my eyes and lost consciousness for perhaps a minute,

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00:19:38.519 --> 00:19:44.119
<v Speaker 1>perhaps more. A sharp clicking sound awoke me. It was

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00:19:44.160 --> 00:19:47.720
<v Speaker 1>a typewriter. There seated on a chair in front of it,

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00:19:47.880 --> 00:19:51.279
<v Speaker 1>playing nimbly on the queer instrument, was a white, misty figure.

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<v Speaker 1>It had finished. It, closed the cover down and turned

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00:19:55.640 --> 00:19:58.759
<v Speaker 1>the key. It wheeled round to the door, and I

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00:19:58.759 --> 00:20:01.839
<v Speaker 1>saw the face and whiskers. I knew so well it

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00:20:01.880 --> 00:20:06.799
<v Speaker 1>was twizzledom himself. My first impulse was to wake him,

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<v Speaker 1>but I had heard that it was dangerous to wake

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<v Speaker 1>persons walking in their sleep. He wanted all the sleep

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<v Speaker 1>he could get, so I decided to let him alone,

325
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<v Speaker 1>walk down to my own chambers and get some rest myself.

326
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<v Speaker 1>When I got out into Old Square, I could not

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<v Speaker 1>help roaring with laughter. It was too funny. The idea

328
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<v Speaker 1>of old Twizzleton writing messages to himself on the typewriter

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00:20:27.920 --> 00:20:30.759
<v Speaker 1>and being frightened out of his wits by them. With

330
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<v Speaker 1>a story to tell against him. No one would believe it.

331
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<v Speaker 1>It was too good to be true. I awoke a

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<v Speaker 1>little late the next morning, but went straight down to

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<v Speaker 1>Old Square before breakfast. Alas I was too late. There

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<v Speaker 1>was Foss in misery over a hasty scrawl of Twizzleton's.

335
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<v Speaker 1>He had gone to barn door by the early train.

336
00:20:51.559 --> 00:20:53.759
<v Speaker 1>Foss was to make any excuse he thought fit to

337
00:20:53.880 --> 00:20:57.359
<v Speaker 1>Ritson and Claim. There was the typewriter shattered into a

338
00:20:57.400 --> 00:21:02.759
<v Speaker 1>thousand pieces, its intricate machinery, a shapeless chaos. I shuddered

339
00:21:02.799 --> 00:21:05.039
<v Speaker 1>to think what would happen if there was anything between

340
00:21:05.119 --> 00:21:10.720
<v Speaker 1>Charlie Colston and missus Twizzleton. In town, everyone was asking

341
00:21:10.759 --> 00:21:14.200
<v Speaker 1>what had become of Twizzleton. The rumor went round the

342
00:21:14.240 --> 00:21:18.799
<v Speaker 1>lock course that he was insane. I maintained a discreet silence.

343
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<v Speaker 1>Mister Claim was almost crying, a slow coach murmuring something

344
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<v Speaker 1>about bad news, and his learned leader rose to continue

345
00:21:27.480 --> 00:21:33.000
<v Speaker 1>Twizolton's opening. Lord Usher, unrestrained by the presence of Twizzleton,

346
00:21:33.400 --> 00:21:36.000
<v Speaker 1>made the Court of Appeal a place of fiery torment

347
00:21:36.079 --> 00:21:41.240
<v Speaker 1>to that eminent elderly junior mister slow Coach. Bustle QC

348
00:21:41.440 --> 00:21:44.640
<v Speaker 1>for Badger was not even called upon to reply. Bun

349
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<v Speaker 1>Coom and another were dismissed with costs the early train stop.

350
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<v Speaker 1>As I knew at every station forty in number, I

351
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<v Speaker 1>could imagine poor Twizzleton's state of mind as he potted

352
00:21:56.480 --> 00:21:59.680
<v Speaker 1>along in a slow train to barn Door. He arrived

353
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<v Speaker 1>at the US about breakfast time. I have the story

354
00:22:02.200 --> 00:22:05.440
<v Speaker 1>from Grimbleton, who was there. He came into the breakfast

355
00:22:05.559 --> 00:22:10.079
<v Speaker 1>room and his appearance elicited a shout of surprise. What

356
00:22:10.200 --> 00:22:15.599
<v Speaker 1>has become a Buncombe versus Badger, cried Lord barn Door said, old, eh,

357
00:22:15.960 --> 00:22:19.440
<v Speaker 1>not that I know of, muttered Twizzleton sulkily, and then,

358
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<v Speaker 1>looking round fiercely, asked, where's my wife? Not down yet,

359
00:22:24.640 --> 00:22:29.559
<v Speaker 1>replied Lord barn Door. Twizzleton looked hastily round, as though

360
00:22:29.559 --> 00:22:31.759
<v Speaker 1>in search of some one else, and then tore upstairs

361
00:22:31.799 --> 00:22:34.599
<v Speaker 1>to his wife's room. The whole company looked at each

362
00:22:34.640 --> 00:22:39.640
<v Speaker 1>other in silence. There was some explanation about bad news,

363
00:22:40.119 --> 00:22:43.559
<v Speaker 1>but the Twizzletons never went into morning, and missus Twizzletein

364
00:22:43.640 --> 00:22:46.960
<v Speaker 1>seemed very merry, all that day. It was true that

365
00:22:47.000 --> 00:22:49.559
<v Speaker 1>Twizzleton was moody and shut himself up a good deal.

366
00:22:50.519 --> 00:22:53.240
<v Speaker 1>Grimbleton told me that he never understood the whole business

367
00:22:53.240 --> 00:22:56.720
<v Speaker 1>in the least in fact, in Twizzleton's circle. It was

368
00:22:56.720 --> 00:23:00.559
<v Speaker 1>a nine days wonder. By the bye, I almost forgot

369
00:23:00.559 --> 00:23:03.160
<v Speaker 1>to mention that Charlie Colston left Barn Door to be

370
00:23:03.160 --> 00:23:05.759
<v Speaker 1>married in Scotland the day after Twizzleton came to town.

371
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<v Speaker 1>When Twizzleton returned to Old Square, he was a sadder

372
00:23:09.559 --> 00:23:13.079
<v Speaker 1>and wiser man. He gave up believing in ghosts and

373
00:23:13.119 --> 00:23:16.960
<v Speaker 1>did not buy another typewriter. I told Twizzleton that I

374
00:23:17.000 --> 00:23:19.559
<v Speaker 1>would not let the matter go any farther, and I

375
00:23:19.640 --> 00:23:21.240
<v Speaker 1>mentioned at the time that he might get me the

376
00:23:21.319 --> 00:23:24.720
<v Speaker 1>junior brief in Buncombert's Badger, which went to the House

377
00:23:24.759 --> 00:23:29.680
<v Speaker 1>of Lords, where, through Twizzleton's clear arguments, nors Justices Smug

378
00:23:29.720 --> 00:23:35.200
<v Speaker 1>and summer Bosh were overruled that year, mostly through Twizzleton's influence.

379
00:23:35.440 --> 00:23:40.000
<v Speaker 1>My Phoebe credited me with two thousand pounds. I have

380
00:23:40.119 --> 00:23:43.359
<v Speaker 1>kept my secret well, but since Twizzleton succeeded Lord Usher

381
00:23:43.400 --> 00:23:46.240
<v Speaker 1>as Master of the rolls, Lady Twizzleton has not called

382
00:23:46.279 --> 00:23:49.559
<v Speaker 1>on missus Penrose. And although my wife assures me that

383
00:23:49.640 --> 00:23:52.119
<v Speaker 1>she is rather glad of it, she is always telling

384
00:23:52.160 --> 00:23:53.839
<v Speaker 1>me now that she does not think so good a

385
00:23:53.880 --> 00:23:55.759
<v Speaker 1>story should be lost to the world as that of

386
00:23:56.119 --> 00:23:57.319
<v Speaker 1>Twizzleton's typewriter