Speaker 1: Hey, Hey, and bad with.
Speaker 2: Something for you to think about. What I'm gonna say.
Speaker 2: Some people are gonna agree. Some people want but I
Speaker 2: know it's true, and I understand.
Speaker 1: People who don't want to accept it. But I know
Speaker 1: it's truth.
Speaker 2: Looking outward for love when you should be looking inward.
Speaker 2: That's what most people in the world are doing, looking
Speaker 2: outward for love. When I say outward, I mean you're
Speaker 2: looking up to other people for love when you should
Speaker 2: be looking inward. No one can make you happy. No
Speaker 2: one can give you what you need. As I said,
Speaker 2: what you need. No one can give you that joy,
Speaker 2: that peace. You're the only one who can do it
Speaker 2: for yourself. Outside of Jesus, outside of God, the Father,
Speaker 2: I'm talking about these natural beings. You're the only one
Speaker 2: who can make you happy. Now, don't misconscrew what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: I'm not saying people cannot bring happiness into your life.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that. But what I am saying is.
Speaker 2: In order for happiness, happiness to be lasting, it has
Speaker 2: to come from you.
Speaker 1: It has to come from a youth.
Speaker 2: You're the only one because you have to have that
Speaker 2: inside of you. You have to have that happiness inside
Speaker 2: of you to have that happiness inside of you.
Speaker 3: It gives you peace, It gives you that joy because see,
Speaker 3: when you have it for yourself, no one can take
Speaker 3: it from.
Speaker 1: You, no one, no one can take it from you.
Speaker 2: But see what most people do is most people in
Speaker 2: this world, it's a sad thing.
Speaker 1: I mean it's sad. It is sad. Most people in
Speaker 1: this world.
Speaker 2: Look for other individuals to make them happy. And when
Speaker 2: you do that, what happens is you give power.
Speaker 1: To people.
Speaker 2: You give power for them to hurt you. You give
Speaker 2: power for them to abuse you and to use you.
Speaker 2: You give power for them to do those things to you.
Speaker 2: You do.
Speaker 1: And when you do that, you also give power for
Speaker 1: them to hurt you.
Speaker 2: Only you have the control for that, only you. If
Speaker 2: you don't think you're worthy, guess what. The person you
Speaker 2: seeking love from is not gonna think you're worthy either.
Speaker 1: It's gonna give him or her that advantage.
Speaker 2: To use you and abuse you because they know you
Speaker 2: already think bless them yourself. They already know you'll do
Speaker 2: anything for love, so they'll take advantage of you. They'll
Speaker 2: use you, they'll abuse you because you have shown them
Speaker 2: how you're so eager for love so you teach.
Speaker 1: Them exactly how.
Speaker 2: To treat you. People look outward when they definitely need
Speaker 2: to look inward, because see, looking outward, what you do
Speaker 2: is you end up with people who are similar as you.
Speaker 1: That's why so many people get into trauma bonding. You know,
Speaker 1: they get into.
Speaker 2: Relationships where the other person is broken and they're broken.
Speaker 2: So people think, oh, because we have similar backgrounds, we've
Speaker 2: gone through similar trauma or whatever. They think it makes
Speaker 2: them closer, it makes them on an e Even playing
Speaker 2: that is so far from the truth. So far, all
Speaker 2: that does.
Speaker 1: Is bring more drama and chaos into your life. When
Speaker 1: you're dealing with someone who.
Speaker 2: Have their own unresolved issues, it only bring trauma into
Speaker 2: your life. Unfortunately, It's what a lot of people don't
Speaker 2: understand because they're seeking love. They're seeking that love, they're
Speaker 2: seeking that self gratification, they're seeking that validation, they're seeking
Speaker 2: that support, and all of those things they're seeking in
Speaker 2: their significant others. They want that instant happening. No, you
Speaker 2: have to heal from your issues. You have to become
Speaker 2: a better person, You have to become of a better
Speaker 2: mindset before you're healed, before you can go through life
Speaker 2: being a better person, because when you're looking to other people,
Speaker 2: then you have to also inherit all of their issues.
Speaker 2: You inherit their issues empower them on top of your
Speaker 2: unresolved issues.
Speaker 1: So it just weighs you down more and more and more.
Speaker 2: And for many of you who don't love yourself in
Speaker 2: the first place, it just makes your life worse. Let
Speaker 2: me tell you how, I know many of you don't
Speaker 2: love yourself.
Speaker 1: You're too busy worshiping other people.
Speaker 2: You spend all your time on social media trying to
Speaker 2: look into the lives of what.
Speaker 1: Other people doing. You give your last dime to people
Speaker 1: you don't know because of the status they hold.
Speaker 2: You seeking love and all the wrong places, with all
Speaker 2: the wrong people, in.
Speaker 1: All the wrong ways.
Speaker 2: You open yourself up to people and things that are
Speaker 2: no good for you.
Speaker 1: Need I go on, need I go on. And one
Speaker 1: of the things that hurting most people in today's world is.
Speaker 2: You're looking at what society says how you should look,
Speaker 2: how you should eat, how you should dress, who you
Speaker 2: should love, I mean, how your skin tone should look.
Speaker 1: I mean, you're looking at.
Speaker 2: The opinion and views of other broken people, because that's
Speaker 2: what make up people. People who are broken, who are evil, wicked,
Speaker 2: full of of greed, full of self hate.
Speaker 1: I mean so many negative things.
Speaker 2: That's who you're listening to, That's who you're pattering your
Speaker 2: life after.
Speaker 1: Makes no sense at all. It makes no sense. It
Speaker 1: really makes no sense.
Speaker 2: But see, you can't see it because your eyes are
Speaker 2: wide shut. You're blind because what you're looking at is
Speaker 2: you want him, you want her. You don't care what
Speaker 2: they're doing to you because you can't see it. You
Speaker 2: can't see it. You may feel the negativity and somewhere
Speaker 2: in some form, but you really can accept it because
Speaker 2: your heart and mind is so focused on that individual,
Speaker 2: you cannot see what they're doing to you.
Speaker 1: You don't accept it as bad.
Speaker 2: You don't accept it as wrong, You don't accept it
Speaker 2: as negative because all you can see is being with
Speaker 2: that person, wanting that person, loving that person.
Speaker 1: When it's not love.
Speaker 2: You just have these feelings and these emotions surrounding that person.
Speaker 1: But it's not love.
Speaker 2: Any negativity someone brings into your life, it is not love.
Speaker 2: It's simply it's not love. People go through life believing
Speaker 2: that other individuals can give.
Speaker 1: Them their heart's desire.
Speaker 2: All I want is someone to love me All I
Speaker 2: want is to be loved. But you don't love yourself.
Speaker 2: Many of you think if you have children, it'll.
Speaker 1: Make you better.
Speaker 3: Sometimes people change because of their children, but most times
Speaker 3: they don't.
Speaker 2: Most times they don't. So I will never say that
Speaker 2: it's a good.
Speaker 1: Thing to have a child because you want someone to love.
Speaker 2: And someone to love you. No, that's the wrong mindset
Speaker 2: to have. It is completely the wrong mindset to have.
Speaker 2: That's why we see these children doing so many terrible
Speaker 2: things because as parents are projecting their pains onto the
Speaker 2: lives of their children, are into the lives of their children.
Speaker 1: Wanting someone to love.
Speaker 2: You, wanting to be in a relationship. I'm not saying
Speaker 2: anything is wrong with that, But what I'm saying is
Speaker 2: love yourself first. Stop looking outward for love. When love
Speaker 2: starts with you loving yourself. It is a must. It
Speaker 2: is an absolute must. And I will tell you with
Speaker 2: all certainty that people who allow individuals in their lives
Speaker 2: to use and abuse them take them for granted.
Speaker 1: And all those negative things. You don't love yourself.
Speaker 2: I don't care what you think. You do not love yourself.
Speaker 2: You're looking for love the wrong way. Love starts with
Speaker 2: you loving yourself so you can understand love, so you
Speaker 2: know what loves look like.
Speaker 1: Because people love.
Speaker 2: To play games, They absolutely love playing games, making you
Speaker 2: think one way when things are really another.
Speaker 1: You believe you're in a.
Speaker 2: Relationship and they haven't thought about being in a relationship
Speaker 2: with you. But you think because of the things that
Speaker 2: have taken place in your interactions with that individual, you
Speaker 2: think that you're in a relationship, but to them, you're
Speaker 2: not in a relationship. That's why I say, hey, it's
Speaker 2: great to be in love, but don't be in love
Speaker 2: by yourself. And a lot of people are because most
Speaker 2: people are in one sided relationships, one sided marriages, and
Speaker 2: it's all because you don't love yourself. It's all because
Speaker 2: you're looking for love. And someone who really doesn't love
Speaker 2: his or herself, a person who love his or herself,
Speaker 2: they're not gonna mistreat you. They're not gonna misguide you.
Speaker 2: They're not gonna use and abuse you. They're not gonna
Speaker 2: disrespect you. No, they're not, because they will be mature people,
Speaker 2: people who have healed.
Speaker 1: From their own pains, people who have grew up mentally.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm talking about.
Speaker 2: You must love yourself and grow mentally, mentally mature. You
Speaker 2: must in order to have a better life and to
Speaker 2: be of a better mindset.
Speaker 1: You must, you must. But unfortunately, most people have not.
Speaker 2: It's a very sad thing, but most people have not.
Speaker 2: Most people have not grown to that mature level. We
Speaker 2: are seeing a world full of adults who have carried
Speaker 2: years and years and years of pain that they should
Speaker 2: have let go of long ago. That's what This world
Speaker 2: is full of, a bunch of hurt people who are
Speaker 2: chasing after this, chasing after that. You know what, when
Speaker 2: you know in love yourself, you're not going through life
Speaker 2: stepping on necks and backs and anything else to get ahead,
Speaker 2: trying to get in relationship with all of these people
Speaker 2: because of who they are. That's the furthest thing from
Speaker 2: your mind. Because people think, oh, if I.
Speaker 4: Get with him and he's in the industry or he
Speaker 4: is a politician, or he is this or that, it's
Speaker 4: gonna benefit you.
Speaker 1: No, that's what's wrong with people.
Speaker 2: You shouldn't be trying to get someone else's security and
Speaker 2: someone else's stack or rack or whatever.
Speaker 1: They call it these days. Money.
Speaker 2: You should have your own if that way, you don't
Speaker 2: have to worry about people dangling things in your face
Speaker 2: to make you do what they want you to do,
Speaker 2: because you don't have your own love yourself, love yourself.
Speaker 2: When you love yourself, it alleviates the fears and the
Speaker 2: insecurities that you've had.
Speaker 1: It changes you.
Speaker 2: And you will never ever go through life letting people
Speaker 2: treat you any kind of way.
Speaker 1: You never will. You never will again. It just won't.
Speaker 1: You will not.
Speaker 2: But until people understand, they'll keep the same cycles going.
Speaker 1: Because no growth have occurred, No growth have occurred.
Speaker 2: People so busy, so busy looking out with for love
Speaker 2: when they need to look inward. The best relationship you
Speaker 2: can and being besides God, is with yourself. Knowing yourself,
Speaker 2: understanding who you are as a person.
Speaker 1: That is the greatest thing.
Speaker 2: You can do for yourself, becoming a better person, no
Speaker 2: longer being a prisoner of your own mindset, but leaving.
Speaker 1: Those negative things people said to.
Speaker 2: You, defining your life by the things you've gone through.
Speaker 2: Letting the men and women in your life treat you
Speaker 2: any kind of You'll do none of that, none of it.
Speaker 2: When you know who you are and you love yourself,
Speaker 2: you're gonna let go of all of that stuff you've
Speaker 2: been carrying.
Speaker 1: You're gonna let it go.
Speaker 2: You're gonna let it go because you're gonna know it
Speaker 2: don't mean that to you. It don't matter to you
Speaker 2: like you thought things mattered.
Speaker 1: Your life changes.
Speaker 2: But you can't get to that point always seeking love
Speaker 2: from someone else.
Speaker 1: You gotta love yourself.
Speaker 4: That means healing from what else.
Speaker 1: You letting it go.
Speaker 2: Okay, you went through what you went through, and I'm
Speaker 2: not trying to make it seem that you.
Speaker 1: Didn't go through anything. You went through it.
Speaker 2: But you should not allow it to destroy the rest
Speaker 2: of your life. You should not allow it.
Speaker 1: To destroy your opportunities.
Speaker 2: You should not allow it to define who you are
Speaker 2: the rest of your life. You are a disservice to yourself.
Speaker 1: When you do that.
Speaker 2: That's what people are going through life the same way,
Speaker 2: same mindset, no growth, full of negativity, don't believe that
Speaker 2: they deserve better, not trying to be better, getting with
Speaker 2: people who are treating them all kind of ways because
Speaker 2: they know they can.
Speaker 1: You're looking in the wrong places for love.
Speaker 2: It's starting to be you loving you, loving that man,
Speaker 2: that woman, that young person, that older person who is
Speaker 2: looking back at you in that mirror.
Speaker 1: Some of you even avoid mirrors.
Speaker 2: You avoid mirrors because you don't want to see that
Speaker 2: person staring back. That is very unhealthy, very unhealthy. You
Speaker 2: have to know and love yourself and forget what society
Speaker 2: is saying, because.
Speaker 1: Remember that if you don't remember one thing, remember.
Speaker 2: This society is full of broken people who don't have
Speaker 2: themselves together, who don't love themselves. That's why they telling
Speaker 2: you to bleach your skin. That's why they telling you
Speaker 2: to get bigger boobs. You need a bigger butt, you
Speaker 2: need a tiny waistline. You need to be this weight,
Speaker 2: you need to be that weight. I mean, it's just craziness.
Speaker 2: When you love yourself, you.
Speaker 1: Don't care what they're saying.
Speaker 2: You love who you see in that mirror. You have confidence,
Speaker 2: You believe in yourself. You don't care although you've gone
Speaker 2: through things, you.
Speaker 1: Don't care that whatever it is, you don't care enough
Speaker 1: to allow.
Speaker 2: It to sabotage the rest of your life.
Speaker 1: You let it go.
Speaker 2: When you love yourself and that man and that woman
Speaker 2: who's not treating you right, who's no good.
Speaker 1: For you, you definitely will not entertain. You won't You
Speaker 1: will not entertain that.
Speaker 2: You will not get with a person who do not
Speaker 2: enhance your life. If you with someone you're struggling and
Speaker 2: they're struggling, make it make sense?
Speaker 1: How is that good for you? You can't rub two
Speaker 1: pennies together and they can't either.
Speaker 2: And it's not all about that, because you have people
Speaker 2: who have plenty of money, but they're no good for
Speaker 2: each other because they're atticts, or one is an attic,
Speaker 2: and you're trying so desperately to save fixing and change
Speaker 2: him that you're destroying yourself. And these are people with
Speaker 2: lots of money. You're getting with individuals who have five
Speaker 2: and six baby mamas.
Speaker 1: How is that gonna benefit you? I mean, you.
Speaker 2: Gotta think about what you're doing and think about why
Speaker 2: you're doing it. Why do you think that person who
Speaker 2: obviously is no good for you is good for you?
Speaker 2: Make it make sense, as they say, because it does not.
Speaker 2: You have to think about what you're doing and what
Speaker 2: you're allowing in your life.
Speaker 1: You have to think about the choices that you're making.
Speaker 1: You must.
Speaker 2: A person who is no good for you is no
Speaker 2: good for you. You can't make them any good for
Speaker 2: you when they're no good for you. Stop looking for
Speaker 2: love there and people when you need to be searching
Speaker 2: your soul, your.
Speaker 1: Own heart and mind.
Speaker 2: You need to be making a change within yourself so
Speaker 2: you can love yourself and so your eyes can see
Speaker 2: what is.
Speaker 1: Really before you.
Speaker 2: You don't have time for the shenanigans of other people,
Speaker 2: people with their own problems, bringing them and projecting them
Speaker 2: into your life.
Speaker 1: When you love yourself, you know you deserve better than that.
Speaker 1: You won't entertain that.
Speaker 2: So I'm going to end this episode leaving it right there. Listen,
Speaker 2: Thank you for listening. Much love. I hope everyone is
Speaker 2: doing well. Please, No one can change your life but you.
Speaker 2: If you don't want to, that's on you too. If
Speaker 2: you want to, that's on you. But he or she
Speaker 2: they're not going to be able to give you the
Speaker 2: love you deserve when you don't love yourself, because you
Speaker 2: will allow and accept things that you shouldn't, you will
Speaker 2: teach them a very unhealthy.
Speaker 1: Way to treat you. Because you're seeking, and you're desiring.
Speaker 2: And you you're wanting because of all the lacking you
Speaker 2: of all the because of all the insecurities in you.
Speaker 2: When and when you are in that state of mind,
Speaker 2: you'll go through so much hell trying to love the
Speaker 2: hell out of them. Only to find yourself in hell.
Speaker 2: It starts with you loving yourself. That's how love begins.
Speaker 2: With you loving yourself. In that way, you can recognize
Speaker 2: healthy love. Most people haven't never experienced it because they're
Speaker 2: too busy seeking love with the wrong people.
Speaker 1: So thank you for listening reach out to me. I
Speaker 1: love hearing from you. Thank you again. I in every
Speaker 1: episode the same and I hope you do it. Thank
Speaker 1: on it