WEBVTT

1
00:00:03.160 --> 00:00:04.919
<v Speaker 1>Callaroga Shark Media.

2
00:00:10.039 --> 00:00:12.800
<v Speaker 2>Hey there, I'm Johnny Mack with your daily comedy news

3
00:00:12.800 --> 00:00:15.439
<v Speaker 2>and daily briefing on stand up comedy comedians in the

4
00:00:15.439 --> 00:00:18.760
<v Speaker 2>comedy industry. A phraeze that apparently if you stop saying,

5
00:00:19.160 --> 00:00:22.519
<v Speaker 2>your Spotify numbers go down. Apparently that phrase works, And

6
00:00:22.839 --> 00:00:25.000
<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna try and keep it light today. I'm looking

7
00:00:25.039 --> 00:00:27.719
<v Speaker 2>ahead to tomorrow's script. I'm gonna dive in tomorrow about

8
00:00:27.760 --> 00:00:29.559
<v Speaker 2>Andrew Schultz a little bit. So tomorrow's gonna get a

9
00:00:29.559 --> 00:00:32.119
<v Speaker 2>little political. I'll keep it silly today. I want to

10
00:00:32.159 --> 00:00:34.840
<v Speaker 2>dive into this Kermit gait. Have you heard Kermit the

11
00:00:34.880 --> 00:00:37.359
<v Speaker 2>Frog's current voice. We got a whole problem with that.

12
00:00:37.640 --> 00:00:41.079
<v Speaker 2>We'll get to that in a second. Briefly political, you

13
00:00:41.159 --> 00:00:44.880
<v Speaker 2>know this Epstein stuff is pretty serious when Jimmy Fallon

14
00:00:45.119 --> 00:00:47.479
<v Speaker 2>is cracking jokes about it. Fallon said, well, guys. The

15
00:00:47.679 --> 00:00:50.880
<v Speaker 2>fallout from the latest Epstein files release continues, and President

16
00:00:50.920 --> 00:00:53.399
<v Speaker 2>Trump's Justice Department said that it's not a crime to

17
00:00:53.479 --> 00:00:56.079
<v Speaker 2>party with Epstein. Falon said, did years to come up

18
00:00:56.119 --> 00:00:57.719
<v Speaker 2>with an excuse, and that's what you went with. If

19
00:00:57.719 --> 00:00:59.359
<v Speaker 2>someone said that to you, what a super Bowl party?

20
00:00:59.359 --> 00:01:01.799
<v Speaker 2>And slowly back away and call the police fallent again

21
00:01:02.359 --> 00:01:05.439
<v Speaker 2>in a Trump impression, said partying with Epstein doesn't make

22
00:01:05.439 --> 00:01:08.799
<v Speaker 2>me a criminal. The thirty four criminal convictions do fallen

23
00:01:08.840 --> 00:01:11.799
<v Speaker 2>s data, and this one's a little hacky, but on point. Yeah.

24
00:01:11.799 --> 00:01:14.000
<v Speaker 2>They said it's not a crime to party with Jeffrey Epstein,

25
00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:15.640
<v Speaker 2>which is pretty much like saying it's not a crime

26
00:01:15.719 --> 00:01:19.480
<v Speaker 2>enough brunch with Jeffrey Dahmer. Jimmy Kimmel said, that's right.

27
00:01:19.519 --> 00:01:21.480
<v Speaker 2>It's also not a crime to borrow a bottle of

28
00:01:21.480 --> 00:01:25.200
<v Speaker 2>baby oil from Diddy. Our first story today, I'm doing cold.

29
00:01:25.319 --> 00:01:27.840
<v Speaker 2>I came down to the studio right around noon and

30
00:01:27.959 --> 00:01:30.480
<v Speaker 2>check my phone and I had a note from one

31
00:01:30.480 --> 00:01:32.799
<v Speaker 2>of the listeners who told me I might want to

32
00:01:32.879 --> 00:01:35.640
<v Speaker 2>check out Bill Burr's Facebook page, and I'm like, hmm,

33
00:01:35.920 --> 00:01:39.200
<v Speaker 2>I'm intrigued. Well, it seems here that Bill Burr has

34
00:01:39.200 --> 00:01:42.200
<v Speaker 2>announced some dates he'll be playing some shows, and I

35
00:01:42.239 --> 00:01:44.799
<v Speaker 2>was told to check out the comments section. Let's see

36
00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:47.519
<v Speaker 2>common number one, how many Saudi princesses will be there

37
00:01:47.560 --> 00:01:50.680
<v Speaker 2>for the show bill Someone posted Bill Burrd did the math.

38
00:01:50.719 --> 00:01:52.920
<v Speaker 2>I figured it would be worth losing ten million dollars

39
00:01:52.920 --> 00:01:55.799
<v Speaker 2>to make one million dollars. Dennis posted, sure, hope they

40
00:01:55.799 --> 00:01:58.439
<v Speaker 2>have a Chili's near these venues. That's very good, Dennis

41
00:01:58.439 --> 00:02:00.760
<v Speaker 2>for the win there. Peter, after he did his free

42
00:02:00.840 --> 00:02:03.040
<v Speaker 2>Luigi on a chat show, a call was made and

43
00:02:03.079 --> 00:02:06.200
<v Speaker 2>he hasn't been the same since. Dave went with bonesaw

44
00:02:06.239 --> 00:02:09.159
<v Speaker 2>Bill coming at you get your tickets. Ray wrote, I'll

45
00:02:09.159 --> 00:02:12.080
<v Speaker 2>bring my Saudi funded nine to eleven shirt. Liam called

46
00:02:12.120 --> 00:02:14.599
<v Speaker 2>him the Prince Harry of comedy. I like that one,

47
00:02:15.199 --> 00:02:19.919
<v Speaker 2>and Matt went with Texas Are you sure? Bill Burr

48
00:02:20.159 --> 00:02:21.879
<v Speaker 2>may have had the worst year of any of the

49
00:02:21.879 --> 00:02:25.199
<v Speaker 2>comedians of twenty twenty five. Our big topic today is

50
00:02:25.360 --> 00:02:28.520
<v Speaker 2>Kermit Gate. I can't decide if this is either going

51
00:02:28.599 --> 00:02:30.360
<v Speaker 2>to be the thing that gets more downloads than any

52
00:02:30.400 --> 00:02:33.319
<v Speaker 2>episode I've ever done, or if I'm making a total mistake.

53
00:02:33.360 --> 00:02:35.439
<v Speaker 2>A lot of new listeners joining on this week as

54
00:02:35.439 --> 00:02:38.199
<v Speaker 2>I'm running some advertising. Hello new listeners, I appreciate you,

55
00:02:38.280 --> 00:02:41.439
<v Speaker 2>hope you stick around. But this Kermit thing is bothering me.

56
00:02:41.879 --> 00:02:44.520
<v Speaker 2>Have you seen this. There's a new Muppet show and

57
00:02:44.639 --> 00:02:47.960
<v Speaker 2>someone is doing the voice of Kermit the Frog. I

58
00:02:48.039 --> 00:02:50.759
<v Speaker 2>brought some audio. Let's go all the way back to

59
00:02:50.919 --> 00:02:54.400
<v Speaker 2>nineteen seventy one. The original voice of Kermit the Frog

60
00:02:54.639 --> 00:02:57.599
<v Speaker 2>Jim Henson. This is very early in the Kermit the

61
00:02:57.599 --> 00:03:00.599
<v Speaker 2>Frog universe. Jim Henson, here is a guest on Dick

62
00:03:00.680 --> 00:03:03.080
<v Speaker 2>Havevitt's TV show. I just want to share this with

63
00:03:03.120 --> 00:03:05.479
<v Speaker 2>you quickly, and I want you to remember this when

64
00:03:05.479 --> 00:03:08.280
<v Speaker 2>we get around to Kermit the Frog on Jimmy Kimmel's

65
00:03:08.280 --> 00:03:12.080
<v Speaker 2>show some forty five years later. But here's Jim Henson

66
00:03:12.199 --> 00:03:13.520
<v Speaker 2>performing Kermit the Frog.

67
00:03:14.080 --> 00:03:18.159
<v Speaker 1>Hell yeah, hi, oh yeah, well how do you do?

68
00:03:18.360 --> 00:03:21.960
<v Speaker 1>It's nice to be here, you know, and hello out

69
00:03:21.960 --> 00:03:27.919
<v Speaker 1>thereon you left. But he's his whole body has changed

70
00:03:27.919 --> 00:03:30.560
<v Speaker 1>a great deal since you know, the early one. Why

71
00:03:30.560 --> 00:03:32.960
<v Speaker 1>did it change? Is it a matter of diet or yeah,

72
00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:37.199
<v Speaker 1>well it's not really diet. No, same matter of progressing,

73
00:03:37.280 --> 00:03:41.360
<v Speaker 1>you know, in the direction of you know, better looking frogs.

74
00:03:41.400 --> 00:03:42.400
<v Speaker 1>I suppose.

75
00:03:43.680 --> 00:03:46.280
<v Speaker 2>Get a little bit more modern. This is the Kermit

76
00:03:46.360 --> 00:03:48.080
<v Speaker 2>the Frog in your head if you were of a

77
00:03:48.080 --> 00:03:51.159
<v Speaker 2>certain age, say fifty six years old, recording a podcast

78
00:03:51.159 --> 00:03:54.280
<v Speaker 2>in your basement. This is what Kermit the Frog sounds like.

79
00:03:54.319 --> 00:03:57.719
<v Speaker 2>This from the nineteen eighty six oscars I Got I

80
00:03:57.719 --> 00:03:58.080
<v Speaker 2>Got You?

81
00:03:58.719 --> 00:04:03.400
<v Speaker 1>Yes, Unless or not. Animated short films weave their magic

82
00:04:03.639 --> 00:04:07.199
<v Speaker 1>unrestrained by the limitations of human actors.

83
00:04:07.240 --> 00:04:11.759
<v Speaker 3>True, an animated character can defy the laws of gravity.

84
00:04:11.439 --> 00:04:15.360
<v Speaker 1>Mmmm, move from place to place without regard to space

85
00:04:15.759 --> 00:04:16.560
<v Speaker 1>or time.

86
00:04:16.519 --> 00:04:21.439
<v Speaker 3>Woo, and continue to amuse generation after generation without growing

87
00:04:21.480 --> 00:04:23.399
<v Speaker 3>older or asking for a raise.

88
00:04:24.519 --> 00:04:29.600
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. In short, and we are animated characters, and these

89
00:04:29.600 --> 00:04:32.439
<v Speaker 1>short films, they appear and can do absolutely anything the

90
00:04:32.480 --> 00:04:33.920
<v Speaker 1>imagination can conjure.

91
00:04:34.519 --> 00:04:37.600
<v Speaker 2>Sadly, Jim Henson passed away in nineteen ninety, Kermit the

92
00:04:37.600 --> 00:04:40.319
<v Speaker 2>Frog did not. Kermit was voiced by others. And I'll

93
00:04:40.319 --> 00:04:42.639
<v Speaker 2>get back to that. Here is two thousand and two.

94
00:04:42.759 --> 00:04:45.720
<v Speaker 2>S it's a very very Muppet Christmas movie. And this

95
00:04:45.839 --> 00:04:48.399
<v Speaker 2>still kind of sounds like Kermit the Frog. Jay, I

96
00:04:48.399 --> 00:04:51.399
<v Speaker 2>could sure do with a little star power around your triumph.

97
00:04:52.240 --> 00:04:54.399
<v Speaker 2>Here's any way you can help me out. Muppet movies

98
00:04:54.439 --> 00:04:55.720
<v Speaker 2>are always debased.

99
00:04:56.319 --> 00:04:58.120
<v Speaker 4>You mean, not for me to pop on.

100
00:05:00.199 --> 00:05:02.720
<v Speaker 2>Right right? You got me again? Uh huh, bye bye.

101
00:05:03.120 --> 00:05:05.839
<v Speaker 2>And now here's Kermit the Frog in twenty twenty six.

102
00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:08.759
<v Speaker 2>Listen to this disaster, and I will say to you,

103
00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:13.079
<v Speaker 2>as a master of half ass impressions, most people's half

104
00:05:13.160 --> 00:05:15.519
<v Speaker 2>asked Kermit is better than what you're about to hear.

105
00:05:15.800 --> 00:05:17.920
<v Speaker 2>If I walked up to you right now, and said,

106
00:05:17.920 --> 00:05:21.160
<v Speaker 2>do Kermit the frog. Your kermit would be better than

107
00:05:21.160 --> 00:05:22.839
<v Speaker 2>this one. I don't have a kermit. I know I

108
00:05:22.879 --> 00:05:24.800
<v Speaker 2>have all my half assed impressions, but I don't do

109
00:05:24.839 --> 00:05:27.199
<v Speaker 2>a kermit. I'm not attempting a kermit. You cannot bully

110
00:05:27.199 --> 00:05:29.240
<v Speaker 2>me into doing a kermit. Unless you want to come

111
00:05:29.279 --> 00:05:31.519
<v Speaker 2>to the brewery and buy me a couple beverages. Then maybe,

112
00:05:31.519 --> 00:05:33.439
<v Speaker 2>but I'm not doing a half ass kermit for you now.

113
00:05:33.600 --> 00:05:35.720
<v Speaker 2>If you want to hear a half asked kermit, here

114
00:05:35.839 --> 00:05:38.839
<v Speaker 2>is official Kermit twenty twenty six, speaking with Jimmy Kimmel.

115
00:05:39.560 --> 00:05:40.439
<v Speaker 3>Thanks for having me.

116
00:05:40.800 --> 00:05:43.120
<v Speaker 4>It's great to have you, and I'm excited about the

117
00:05:43.199 --> 00:05:47.560
<v Speaker 4>new project. Wondering how this happened or like you, was

118
00:05:47.600 --> 00:05:51.319
<v Speaker 4>it difficult to get the other muppets together to come back?

119
00:05:51.639 --> 00:05:53.920
<v Speaker 3>No, no, not at all, okay, I knowing you know what.

120
00:05:53.959 --> 00:05:55.759
<v Speaker 3>They couldn't wait to do them up at you again.

121
00:05:55.800 --> 00:05:58.680
<v Speaker 3>But then again, there's not a big demand for a

122
00:05:58.680 --> 00:06:00.879
<v Speaker 3>pig who sings, ain't bear who tells jokes, and a

123
00:06:00.879 --> 00:06:02.600
<v Speaker 3>bunch of dancing raps soue.

124
00:06:02.759 --> 00:06:06.639
<v Speaker 4>Okay that's there now. What were they doing though? During

125
00:06:06.680 --> 00:06:08.639
<v Speaker 4>all this time? What were the other muppets up to.

126
00:06:08.800 --> 00:06:13.360
<v Speaker 3>Oh, well, not much involving a bait check. But you know,

127
00:06:13.399 --> 00:06:15.519
<v Speaker 3>I was trying to get the special off the ground,

128
00:06:15.519 --> 00:06:17.680
<v Speaker 3>which you know, it took a while. Jimmy. You know,

129
00:06:17.959 --> 00:06:20.040
<v Speaker 3>it turns out that a lot of people in Hollywood

130
00:06:20.240 --> 00:06:22.759
<v Speaker 3>say yes when they actually mean no.

131
00:06:23.439 --> 00:06:26.439
<v Speaker 4>I have experienced that myself, Yeah, yeah, yeah.

132
00:06:26.600 --> 00:06:29.319
<v Speaker 3>But you know, as far as the others go, Miss Piggy,

133
00:06:29.439 --> 00:06:32.560
<v Speaker 3>she was on vocal rest, which actually we were all

134
00:06:32.639 --> 00:06:33.279
<v Speaker 3>kind of okay with.

135
00:06:33.439 --> 00:06:36.519
<v Speaker 2>That is unacceptable. They need to do something about that.

136
00:06:37.120 --> 00:06:39.680
<v Speaker 2>The New Muppet Show is out. The Guardian watched it.

137
00:06:39.720 --> 00:06:43.639
<v Speaker 2>They gave it three stores out of five. Their subheadlines says,

138
00:06:43.720 --> 00:06:46.680
<v Speaker 2>this story half hour anniversary special captures the spirit of

139
00:06:46.680 --> 00:06:50.399
<v Speaker 2>the original TV show at points, but Kermit's voice takes

140
00:06:50.439 --> 00:06:53.439
<v Speaker 2>him getting used to. It's the fiftieth anniversary of the

141
00:06:53.560 --> 00:06:56.920
<v Speaker 2>Muppet Show. Disney, which now controls of the Muppet Show,

142
00:06:57.000 --> 00:06:59.480
<v Speaker 2>got the old gang back together and added guest appearances

143
00:06:59.480 --> 00:07:02.639
<v Speaker 2>from Suprise a Carpenter, Seth Rogan, who happens to be

144
00:07:02.639 --> 00:07:05.439
<v Speaker 2>the executive producer, and Maya Roodolph for a one off

145
00:07:05.439 --> 00:07:08.480
<v Speaker 2>half hour special. The Guardian writes, God bless everyone involved.

146
00:07:08.519 --> 00:07:11.519
<v Speaker 2>They've tried. You can feel it. They want to make

147
00:07:11.560 --> 00:07:13.360
<v Speaker 2>it good for us. They know we deserve it, They

148
00:07:13.360 --> 00:07:16.199
<v Speaker 2>know everybody at the moment desperately needs a brief, shining

149
00:07:16.240 --> 00:07:19.319
<v Speaker 2>moment out of the darkness. But as Thomas Wolf so

150
00:07:19.399 --> 00:07:22.319
<v Speaker 2>rightly said, you can't go home again. Look, it's fine

151
00:07:22.439 --> 00:07:25.199
<v Speaker 2>if you've never seen the original. It's probably even good

152
00:07:25.800 --> 00:07:28.199
<v Speaker 2>if you have. There are still moments that tease it

153
00:07:28.279 --> 00:07:31.560
<v Speaker 2>taste and memory. But the bits in between their drab

154
00:07:31.920 --> 00:07:36.360
<v Speaker 2>the script, including and most obviously Statler and Waldorf's heckles,

155
00:07:36.480 --> 00:07:39.480
<v Speaker 2>is begging for a polish Is this despite the half

156
00:07:39.519 --> 00:07:42.160
<v Speaker 2>centuries notice they had a rush job, Or has the

157
00:07:42.160 --> 00:07:44.600
<v Speaker 2>show's time simply passed and no one can carry off

158
00:07:44.639 --> 00:07:47.480
<v Speaker 2>exuberant silliness anymore. Well, let's get to the point of

159
00:07:47.519 --> 00:07:51.759
<v Speaker 2>today's podcast. There does remain the nagging problem of Kermit's

160
00:07:51.839 --> 00:07:54.680
<v Speaker 2>voice Your Mind is Henson played until nineteen ninety. Veteran

161
00:07:54.720 --> 00:07:57.360
<v Speaker 2>muppeteer at Steve Whitmyer inherited the role and played it

162
00:07:57.439 --> 00:08:00.000
<v Speaker 2>until he was dismissed by Disney for what they can

163
00:08:00.120 --> 00:08:05.120
<v Speaker 2>called quote unacceptable business conduct. Matt Vogel now plays the character,

164
00:08:05.199 --> 00:08:09.079
<v Speaker 2>and our dearest Frog sounds jurrently different to anyone born

165
00:08:09.199 --> 00:08:12.319
<v Speaker 2>before Vogel's tenure. It puts the magic even further out

166
00:08:12.319 --> 00:08:15.199
<v Speaker 2>of reach, but maybe only to us and we've had

167
00:08:15.199 --> 00:08:18.040
<v Speaker 2>our time. You'll find all this on Disney Plus now.

168
00:08:18.040 --> 00:08:21.519
<v Speaker 2>Steve Whittmeyer, who was the second voice of Kermit the Frog,

169
00:08:21.959 --> 00:08:25.399
<v Speaker 2>has a blog. Steve wrote, Kermit as Jim created him

170
00:08:25.399 --> 00:08:28.920
<v Speaker 2>contains years of depth and growth without default attention to that.

171
00:08:29.199 --> 00:08:31.319
<v Speaker 2>Do you really believe it's Kermit just because it looks

172
00:08:31.360 --> 00:08:34.080
<v Speaker 2>like him? Kermit is at the top of the Muppet pyramid,

173
00:08:34.240 --> 00:08:36.159
<v Speaker 2>the spoke in the middle of the Muppet wheel around

174
00:08:36.200 --> 00:08:39.799
<v Speaker 2>which all things Muppet revolve, and without Kermit being fully intact,

175
00:08:40.399 --> 00:08:43.480
<v Speaker 2>there is no future for the Muppets, no new directions,

176
00:08:43.799 --> 00:08:48.080
<v Speaker 2>no exploitative reboots, nothing that nurtures the historical connection to you,

177
00:08:48.279 --> 00:08:51.960
<v Speaker 2>the audience. That connection as it was originally established, is vital.

178
00:08:52.559 --> 00:08:56.080
<v Speaker 2>Whitmeyer continues viewing the Muppets primarily as rolls began as

179
00:08:56.159 --> 00:08:58.799
<v Speaker 2>soon as Jim was gone and altered the perception from

180
00:08:58.799 --> 00:09:01.080
<v Speaker 2>seeing them as individual entered who exist on our own

181
00:09:01.120 --> 00:09:04.720
<v Speaker 2>world to being a corporate owned puppet character franchise with

182
00:09:04.799 --> 00:09:08.360
<v Speaker 2>people hired to play them skipping ahead. Corporate thinking goes

183
00:09:08.399 --> 00:09:10.440
<v Speaker 2>that all the years of interior development done by an

184
00:09:10.480 --> 00:09:13.080
<v Speaker 2>originator can be replaced by simply auditioning someone who could

185
00:09:13.120 --> 00:09:16.399
<v Speaker 2>lip sync approximated voice and focus the eyes, even if

186
00:09:16.440 --> 00:09:19.480
<v Speaker 2>that person has no true understanding of the reasons behind

187
00:09:19.480 --> 00:09:22.039
<v Speaker 2>why the world has a solid and loving connection with

188
00:09:22.080 --> 00:09:24.480
<v Speaker 2>the character. But I want you to know, from day

189
00:09:24.519 --> 00:09:27.519
<v Speaker 2>one throughout nearly three decades, not once did I ever

190
00:09:27.519 --> 00:09:30.120
<v Speaker 2>have the notion to make Kermit my own. On the contrary,

191
00:09:30.320 --> 00:09:32.840
<v Speaker 2>was absolutely vital to my process to make certain that

192
00:09:32.919 --> 00:09:36.600
<v Speaker 2>any egotistical notion of marking territory never happen, so that

193
00:09:36.720 --> 00:09:41.840
<v Speaker 2>Kermit remained based solely upon Jim's foundational original Kermit Gate Everybody,

194
00:09:41.840 --> 00:09:44.399
<v Speaker 2>I love it. Dave Chappelle and John Stewart will appear

195
00:09:44.440 --> 00:09:48.480
<v Speaker 2>together at a benefit for Yellow Springs Radio Station WYSO.

196
00:09:48.720 --> 00:09:51.919
<v Speaker 2>This benefit February thirteenth, that's like a week from now.

197
00:09:52.360 --> 00:09:54.840
<v Speaker 2>The general manager of the radio station says, we see

198
00:09:54.840 --> 00:09:57.320
<v Speaker 2>them as aligned, even though they're very different. They're two

199
00:09:57.320 --> 00:09:59.679
<v Speaker 2>of the most important voices calling out how dangerous it

200
00:09:59.720 --> 00:10:02.039
<v Speaker 2>is that First Amendment rights are being trampled, that we're

201
00:10:02.039 --> 00:10:05.519
<v Speaker 2>seeing censorship of important voices and legacy media capitulating to

202
00:10:05.519 --> 00:10:08.639
<v Speaker 2>the Trump administration. We are told the evening with Chappelle

203
00:10:08.639 --> 00:10:11.799
<v Speaker 2>and Stewart will have a talk show Vibe. The GM

204
00:10:12.000 --> 00:10:13.639
<v Speaker 2>said Chappelle has a list of friends he likes to

205
00:10:13.679 --> 00:10:15.639
<v Speaker 2>collaborate with, and John Stewart is on the list. In

206
00:10:15.799 --> 00:10:19.279
<v Speaker 2>John said yes immediately. Jimmy Kimmel told his viewers during

207
00:10:19.279 --> 00:10:21.720
<v Speaker 2>one of his monologues this week that he will demand

208
00:10:21.960 --> 00:10:24.559
<v Speaker 2>to host the Oscars in twenty twenty seven if Milania

209
00:10:24.639 --> 00:10:28.360
<v Speaker 2>ends up nominated in Best Documentary category. He said, mark

210
00:10:28.399 --> 00:10:31.600
<v Speaker 2>my words right now, if Malania gets nominated for an Oscar,

211
00:10:31.840 --> 00:10:34.200
<v Speaker 2>I will host that show. Whether they asked me to

212
00:10:34.360 --> 00:10:36.679
<v Speaker 2>or not, I will insist on it. We'll let Conan know.

213
00:10:37.279 --> 00:10:40.360
<v Speaker 2>Bobby Slayton is in the Epstein files. This from Syracuse

214
00:10:40.399 --> 00:10:44.159
<v Speaker 2>dot Com, who report Bobby Slayton was regularly sending messages

215
00:10:44.480 --> 00:10:48.720
<v Speaker 2>with Jeffrey Epstein. According to screenshots of text messages and emails,

216
00:10:49.399 --> 00:10:53.000
<v Speaker 2>Bobby Slayton's name appears in more than two thousand documents.

217
00:10:53.879 --> 00:10:56.440
<v Speaker 2>I've done two thousand episodes of this podcast. I think

218
00:10:56.480 --> 00:11:00.240
<v Speaker 2>I've mentioned Bobby Slayton twice, including dis mention some of

219
00:11:00.279 --> 00:11:03.480
<v Speaker 2>the correspondents. Thanks Jeffrey Epstein for letting Bobby Slayton stay

220
00:11:03.480 --> 00:11:06.240
<v Speaker 2>at a New York City apartment while on tour. Now

221
00:11:06.279 --> 00:11:09.240
<v Speaker 2>this caught the attention of Syracuse dot com, not for

222
00:11:09.279 --> 00:11:13.480
<v Speaker 2>the reasons you're thinking. Apparently upstate New York sticks up

223
00:11:13.519 --> 00:11:17.960
<v Speaker 2>for itself. They are focused on September twenty fourteen correspondence

224
00:11:17.960 --> 00:11:20.679
<v Speaker 2>in which Slayton wrote, wish I was in NYC having

225
00:11:20.759 --> 00:11:23.639
<v Speaker 2>dinner with you and Woody in Rochester in the depths

226
00:11:23.679 --> 00:11:27.480
<v Speaker 2>of comedy hell send Woodman my best. We are getting

227
00:11:27.480 --> 00:11:29.679
<v Speaker 2>along here, but I left myself a note here that says,

228
00:11:29.799 --> 00:11:33.879
<v Speaker 2>don't bump these next two stories. So okay, Johnny Mack

229
00:11:33.919 --> 00:11:36.840
<v Speaker 2>from the past, I won't. Craig Ferguson was talking about

230
00:11:36.840 --> 00:11:39.759
<v Speaker 2>his podcast and says he'll still do interviews, but only

231
00:11:39.759 --> 00:11:42.200
<v Speaker 2>if they're in person. Ferguson explains, I think I'm probably

232
00:11:42.240 --> 00:11:44.080
<v Speaker 2>as good as anyone who does zoom call interviews, but

233
00:11:44.080 --> 00:11:45.879
<v Speaker 2>in person, I think maybe I'm a little better than

234
00:11:45.879 --> 00:11:47.720
<v Speaker 2>most people who do it. So I kind of feel

235
00:11:47.759 --> 00:11:49.600
<v Speaker 2>like played your strength. I enjoy it much more when

236
00:11:49.639 --> 00:11:51.519
<v Speaker 2>you're in a room talking with someone. So what I

237
00:11:51.559 --> 00:11:53.559
<v Speaker 2>do now with the podcast is if I'm away on work,

238
00:11:53.600 --> 00:11:55.559
<v Speaker 2>I'll just record a half hour of me answering questions

239
00:11:55.600 --> 00:11:58.000
<v Speaker 2>from people who watch the podcast, and then that's the podcast.

240
00:11:58.120 --> 00:12:00.039
<v Speaker 2>If I can't have a guest in the studio, and

241
00:12:00.080 --> 00:12:02.759
<v Speaker 2>I'll just talk directly the people who watch it. Craig's

242
00:12:02.759 --> 00:12:05.960
<v Speaker 2>tour begins today. See that's why I can't bump. The

243
00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:09.879
<v Speaker 2>story begins today in Charlotte, North Carolina. The tour is

244
00:12:09.919 --> 00:12:12.440
<v Speaker 2>called Pants on Fire. He's not sure if he'll make

245
00:12:12.480 --> 00:12:14.200
<v Speaker 2>it a special. Craig says, I don't know if I

246
00:12:14.200 --> 00:12:15.919
<v Speaker 2>want to make any more stand up specials. I made

247
00:12:15.919 --> 00:12:17.360
<v Speaker 2>one a couple years ago and it turned out okay,

248
00:12:17.360 --> 00:12:19.120
<v Speaker 2>and I was happy with it. But the thing is

249
00:12:19.159 --> 00:12:21.399
<v Speaker 2>about making special I always think you do it, and

250
00:12:21.440 --> 00:12:23.200
<v Speaker 2>then if you ever look at it later, you go, ah,

251
00:12:23.320 --> 00:12:25.759
<v Speaker 2>I could have made that better by doing that. Jay Leno,

252
00:12:26.440 --> 00:12:28.759
<v Speaker 2>who some think is the worst person who ever lived,

253
00:12:28.799 --> 00:12:31.279
<v Speaker 2>Craig did not comment on that or not. Jay Leno

254
00:12:31.360 --> 00:12:33.519
<v Speaker 2>has never made a stand up special in fifty years,

255
00:12:33.519 --> 00:12:34.879
<v Speaker 2>and I don't think he ever will. I kind of

256
00:12:34.879 --> 00:12:36.720
<v Speaker 2>get it. I like the doing of stand up. I

257
00:12:36.759 --> 00:12:38.679
<v Speaker 2>don't know that I need to film it. Maybe I will,

258
00:12:38.919 --> 00:12:42.320
<v Speaker 2>I don't know. I hope somebody jokes aside. I hope

259
00:12:42.320 --> 00:12:46.200
<v Speaker 2>somebody has at least captured some jay Leno material, so

260
00:12:46.279 --> 00:12:48.480
<v Speaker 2>that someday, one hundred years from now we could see

261
00:12:48.519 --> 00:12:51.480
<v Speaker 2>what a jay Leno concert look like. Here's another story

262
00:12:51.480 --> 00:12:53.480
<v Speaker 2>that passed. Johnny Max says, I'm not allowed to bump.

263
00:12:53.639 --> 00:12:56.919
<v Speaker 2>British comedians Rob Beckett and Remesh Waggonnathan have tried their

264
00:12:56.960 --> 00:13:00.879
<v Speaker 2>hands at Bob's letting with Team Great Britain. Yes, it's

265
00:13:00.879 --> 00:13:05.039
<v Speaker 2>the Robin Ramesh first Team GB Winter Special in that

266
00:13:05.200 --> 00:13:07.960
<v Speaker 2>the comedians squeeze into Bob's lay suits as they get

267
00:13:07.960 --> 00:13:10.519
<v Speaker 2>a taste of life in Bob's lay. The two part

268
00:13:10.559 --> 00:13:13.759
<v Speaker 2>special follows them in search of their very own winter sport.

269
00:13:14.399 --> 00:13:16.320
<v Speaker 2>I have this dream that someday I'm going to hit

270
00:13:16.399 --> 00:13:18.360
<v Speaker 2>up the Republic of Ireland and see if me and

271
00:13:18.399 --> 00:13:20.639
<v Speaker 2>some friends of mine can be their beach volleyball team.

272
00:13:20.840 --> 00:13:23.679
<v Speaker 2>I haven't done anything about this, but someday I will.

273
00:13:24.240 --> 00:13:28.519
<v Speaker 2>Lance Corporal Taylor Lawrence, who was training for second Olympics,

274
00:13:28.559 --> 00:13:31.919
<v Speaker 2>posted about the experience on social media. He said filming

275
00:13:31.919 --> 00:13:34.360
<v Speaker 2>with SkyTV and Rob Beckett and Ramesh Reagon Ethan was

276
00:13:34.360 --> 00:13:36.000
<v Speaker 2>a lot of fun, although I don't think they should

277
00:13:36.000 --> 00:13:37.919
<v Speaker 2>give up their day jobs. Great guys to be around,

278
00:13:37.960 --> 00:13:39.840
<v Speaker 2>and jumped in with both feet. I see what you

279
00:13:39.879 --> 00:13:42.960
<v Speaker 2>did there, bumping a lot of stories on the fly today.

280
00:13:42.960 --> 00:13:45.039
<v Speaker 2>It's always good when that happens. That makes me happy.

281
00:13:45.480 --> 00:13:47.960
<v Speaker 2>Tomorrow's show, like I said, we'll get into the Ander

282
00:13:48.039 --> 00:13:50.000
<v Speaker 2>Schultz of it all a little bit. Then. Of course,

283
00:13:50.039 --> 00:13:53.000
<v Speaker 2>it's Friday, so Comedy stock Market. Saturday will be the

284
00:13:53.240 --> 00:13:56.639
<v Speaker 2>super Bowl preview. A lot of comedians doing commercials. I'll

285
00:13:56.639 --> 00:13:59.559
<v Speaker 2>talk about that someday. I have a fantastic interview with

286
00:13:59.600 --> 00:14:02.440
<v Speaker 2>comedian Ismo. Ismo will be playing the Just for Last

287
00:14:02.559 --> 00:14:06.919
<v Speaker 2>Vancouver Comedy Festival. I had a lovely half hour conversation

288
00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:08.960
<v Speaker 2>with him the other day, So that'll be Sunday's episode.

289
00:14:08.960 --> 00:14:11.679
<v Speaker 2>Looking ahead to Vancouver. Friend of the show Mike Chisholm,

290
00:14:11.679 --> 00:14:14.519
<v Speaker 2>you know him from the Letterman podcast. He's going to

291
00:14:14.600 --> 00:14:17.879
<v Speaker 2>act as the Vancouver correspondent. The nice folks at Just

292
00:14:17.960 --> 00:14:19.799
<v Speaker 2>for Laughs hooked Mike up with some tickets. He's going

293
00:14:19.840 --> 00:14:22.120
<v Speaker 2>to hit some shows and report back to us. Plus

294
00:14:22.480 --> 00:14:26.320
<v Speaker 2>he's going to see David Letterman. And I told Mike

295
00:14:26.360 --> 00:14:28.639
<v Speaker 2>if he can come up with a David Letterman interview,

296
00:14:28.799 --> 00:14:32.399
<v Speaker 2>I will send him one Canadian dollar via Venmo. Get

297
00:14:32.440 --> 00:14:35.000
<v Speaker 2>it done, Mike. It's been such a busy week. I

298
00:14:35.080 --> 00:14:38.960
<v Speaker 2>really haven't commented too much on Comedy Survivor. Now, if

299
00:14:38.960 --> 00:14:41.799
<v Speaker 2>you're a new listener, we're playing Comedy Survivor. We put

300
00:14:41.840 --> 00:14:45.559
<v Speaker 2>sixteen comedians on Comedy Island, and each week the listeners

301
00:14:45.600 --> 00:14:48.360
<v Speaker 2>are voting off one comedian. What you do is you

302
00:14:48.399 --> 00:14:51.759
<v Speaker 2>go to the Daily Comedy News podcast group. You'll find

303
00:14:51.799 --> 00:14:54.639
<v Speaker 2>a picture. This week's picture is me extinguishing the torch

304
00:14:54.720 --> 00:14:57.480
<v Speaker 2>of Ron White, and I love that. The listeners are like, hey,

305
00:14:57.480 --> 00:14:59.200
<v Speaker 2>you should have had Ron have a cigarette, or you

306
00:14:59.240 --> 00:15:02.600
<v Speaker 2>should ad him some potato salad, and like, Okay, I

307
00:15:02.639 --> 00:15:04.279
<v Speaker 2>don't know how much time you guys think I spend

308
00:15:04.279 --> 00:15:07.600
<v Speaker 2>on these bits. Voting ends at end of day today

309
00:15:07.720 --> 00:15:10.320
<v Speaker 2>so I can record the episodes on Friday. The results

310
00:15:10.320 --> 00:15:13.080
<v Speaker 2>of Comedy Survivor come out Monday's at noon. Easter. And

311
00:15:13.159 --> 00:15:15.559
<v Speaker 2>let me just skim here and just see how things

312
00:15:15.600 --> 00:15:18.600
<v Speaker 2>are trending. I see one vote for somebody whose name

313
00:15:18.639 --> 00:15:20.840
<v Speaker 2>hasn't come up before. H This seems to be a

314
00:15:20.879 --> 00:15:24.799
<v Speaker 2>couple of votes for Jay Leno. Leslie Jones' name seems

315
00:15:24.840 --> 00:15:27.879
<v Speaker 2>to be yours. I scrolled down. Okay, looks like it's

316
00:15:27.879 --> 00:15:31.120
<v Speaker 2>a tight one. Some people are hanging back to see

317
00:15:31.159 --> 00:15:32.960
<v Speaker 2>which way. The group is going to see if they

318
00:15:32.960 --> 00:15:36.039
<v Speaker 2>can help vote someone out or perhaps steer the conversation

319
00:15:36.080 --> 00:15:37.840
<v Speaker 2>away from someone they don't want to vote it out.

320
00:15:37.919 --> 00:15:41.120
<v Speaker 2>Very fascinating. Comedy Survivor. Go to the Facebook group Daily

321
00:15:41.240 --> 00:15:43.799
<v Speaker 2>Comedy News podcast group. Write down the name of somebody

322
00:15:43.799 --> 00:15:47.159
<v Speaker 2>you want off. Please make it super crystal clear so

323
00:15:47.200 --> 00:15:49.279
<v Speaker 2>I don't write like I was kind of thinking maybe

324
00:15:49.320 --> 00:15:52.159
<v Speaker 2>somehow I'll vote off Joshmo. Let's just write Joshmo out

325
00:15:52.200 --> 00:15:54.519
<v Speaker 2>that way. It's nice and easy. We don't need a

326
00:15:54.559 --> 00:15:58.000
<v Speaker 2>controversy over Comedy Survivor. The last thing I want to

327
00:15:58.039 --> 00:16:00.840
<v Speaker 2>get is like a note from Dylan in the Facebook

328
00:16:00.879 --> 00:16:03.159
<v Speaker 2>group on the side, be like, hey, bro, you said

329
00:16:03.320 --> 00:16:05.720
<v Speaker 2>Schmoe had six votes, it's actually seven. I think we've got.

330
00:16:06.159 --> 00:16:08.039
<v Speaker 2>That's a last thing I want for this bit. This

331
00:16:08.120 --> 00:16:10.600
<v Speaker 2>has kind of scary From Reuters, a Russian stand up

332
00:16:10.600 --> 00:16:15.120
<v Speaker 2>comedian was convicted of inciting hatred and jailed for nearly

333
00:16:15.240 --> 00:16:18.759
<v Speaker 2>six years. This over a joke the comedian made about

334
00:16:18.759 --> 00:16:21.799
<v Speaker 2>a legless war veteran Artemi a stan. It has been

335
00:16:21.840 --> 00:16:24.799
<v Speaker 2>sentenced for five years and nine months, also fined three

336
00:16:24.919 --> 00:16:28.720
<v Speaker 2>hundred thousand rubles that's around thirty nine hundred dollars. I'm

337
00:16:28.759 --> 00:16:30.480
<v Speaker 2>no expert on the law, but it seems to me

338
00:16:30.639 --> 00:16:33.600
<v Speaker 2>like the fine and the jail time are very out

339
00:16:33.639 --> 00:16:37.200
<v Speaker 2>of sync. Astanin was also convicted of offending the feelings

340
00:16:37.200 --> 00:16:39.960
<v Speaker 2>of Christians with an off color joke he made about Jesus,

341
00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:44.200
<v Speaker 2>which angered Orthodox nationalists. The crux of all this show

342
00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:47.679
<v Speaker 2>last year in March, the comedian joked about how an

343
00:16:47.720 --> 00:16:50.399
<v Speaker 2>impoverished war veteran who had lost his legs after being

344
00:16:50.399 --> 00:16:52.399
<v Speaker 2>blown up by a mine was now forced to get

345
00:16:52.440 --> 00:16:55.080
<v Speaker 2>around on a skateboard, and the crux of the joke

346
00:16:55.159 --> 00:16:59.039
<v Speaker 2>being that the veteran had run over the comedian's foot. Apparently,

347
00:16:59.120 --> 00:17:02.320
<v Speaker 2>there is video of the joke's punchline, which shows fellow

348
00:17:02.360 --> 00:17:05.240
<v Speaker 2>comedians remaining straight faced and the sound of several audience

349
00:17:05.240 --> 00:17:09.119
<v Speaker 2>members laughing. A stun In tried to flee Russia last year,

350
00:17:09.200 --> 00:17:12.119
<v Speaker 2>but was arrested by police in Belarus and returned to

351
00:17:12.160 --> 00:17:14.640
<v Speaker 2>Moscow to face charges. He was asked by the judge

352
00:17:14.640 --> 00:17:17.079
<v Speaker 2>on Wednesday if he understood his sentence. A stun In

353
00:17:17.240 --> 00:17:19.880
<v Speaker 2>is quoted as saying, to hell with your judicial practice. No,

354
00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:22.160
<v Speaker 2>I don't, and I'm gonna leave you with this one,

355
00:17:22.200 --> 00:17:23.920
<v Speaker 2>because we could all use a laugh this week. This

356
00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:26.759
<v Speaker 2>has nothing to do with comedy. This is just I'm

357
00:17:26.799 --> 00:17:29.000
<v Speaker 2>on the internet all day and I'm looking up stories

358
00:17:29.000 --> 00:17:31.400
<v Speaker 2>for this and for Palace Intrigue, the podcast I write

359
00:17:31.440 --> 00:17:33.359
<v Speaker 2>where we cover the royal family. And you know, I'm

360
00:17:33.359 --> 00:17:35.440
<v Speaker 2>just on the internet all day because this is just

361
00:17:35.480 --> 00:17:38.000
<v Speaker 2>it's what I do. I saw this one again, has

362
00:17:38.079 --> 00:17:40.799
<v Speaker 2>nothing to do with comedy, but it might make you smile.

363
00:17:40.880 --> 00:17:44.319
<v Speaker 2>From the Daily Mail, a man sparked an evacuation at

364
00:17:44.319 --> 00:17:49.119
<v Speaker 2>a French hospital after doctors discovered an eight inch long

365
00:17:49.359 --> 00:17:53.319
<v Speaker 2>live World War One artillery shell in the man's rectum.

366
00:17:53.359 --> 00:17:56.759
<v Speaker 2>That's right, the man was in the hospital. He had

367
00:17:56.799 --> 00:18:00.839
<v Speaker 2>an eight inch World War One artillery shell in his rectum.

368
00:18:01.400 --> 00:18:03.920
<v Speaker 2>The twenty four year old man was described as being

369
00:18:03.960 --> 00:18:08.279
<v Speaker 2>in a state of extreme discomfort. Emergency surgery was carried

370
00:18:08.319 --> 00:18:11.960
<v Speaker 2>out to identify the large object in the man's rectum.

371
00:18:12.119 --> 00:18:14.839
<v Speaker 2>They figured out it was an artillery shell dating back

372
00:18:14.920 --> 00:18:18.319
<v Speaker 2>to the First World War. But here's the money quote

373
00:18:18.519 --> 00:18:21.839
<v Speaker 2>quote Worse still, it had not exploded, so bomb disposable

374
00:18:21.839 --> 00:18:23.759
<v Speaker 2>experts had to be called in to diffuse the shell.

375
00:18:23.920 --> 00:18:27.359
<v Speaker 2>With the fire brigades standing by. Explosives are no jokes.

376
00:18:27.359 --> 00:18:30.359
<v Speaker 2>Staff and patients were evacuated from the hospital. A security

377
00:18:30.359 --> 00:18:33.880
<v Speaker 2>perimeter set up around the accident in emergency unit. The

378
00:18:34.039 --> 00:18:37.319
<v Speaker 2>man is set to be interviewed by police. They are

379
00:18:37.359 --> 00:18:42.279
<v Speaker 2>investigating the charge of handling Category A munitions And here

380
00:18:42.599 --> 00:18:44.559
<v Speaker 2>is I'm gonna read it verbatim. I'm gonna read it

381
00:18:44.559 --> 00:18:46.960
<v Speaker 2>from the article and I'm trying not to laugh. I'm

382
00:18:46.960 --> 00:18:49.960
<v Speaker 2>gonna just try and read this. This is from quoting

383
00:18:50.000 --> 00:18:52.680
<v Speaker 2>directly from the Daily Mail article, and they wrapped it

384
00:18:52.759 --> 00:18:56.799
<v Speaker 2>up with there was no I can't this is too funny. Oh,

385
00:18:56.880 --> 00:18:58.799
<v Speaker 2>let me try again. I could edit this out, but

386
00:18:58.839 --> 00:19:00.720
<v Speaker 2>I want you to hear that. I think here, okay

387
00:19:00.759 --> 00:19:03.680
<v Speaker 2>from the Daily Email. The final sentence of the article

388
00:19:03.839 --> 00:19:10.799
<v Speaker 2>is I can't. Let me have a sip of my

389
00:19:11.039 --> 00:19:14.400
<v Speaker 2>iced coffee here, m okay, try this again, John, and

390
00:19:14.480 --> 00:19:16.720
<v Speaker 2>I could edit this up. That's no fun There was

391
00:19:16.839 --> 00:19:22.680
<v Speaker 2>no Oh boy, I might have to go record another

392
00:19:22.720 --> 00:19:24.599
<v Speaker 2>episode and come back just to do this tag or

393
00:19:24.599 --> 00:19:27.039
<v Speaker 2>have the AI do it right? Why more try. There

394
00:19:27.119 --> 00:19:30.400
<v Speaker 2>was no initial explanation as to why the shell ended

395
00:19:30.440 --> 00:19:33.599
<v Speaker 2>up in the man's body, but local media speculated that

396
00:19:33.680 --> 00:19:35.599
<v Speaker 2>it might have had something to do with his social

397
00:19:35.640 --> 00:19:37.920
<v Speaker 2>life that as she copy news for today Bye,
