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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Stories of Special Forces Operators Podcast. Listen to

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<v Speaker 1>some of the bravest and toughest people on the planet

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<v Speaker 1>share their stories, Sit back and enjoy.

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<v Speaker 2>Welcome back everybody. Well, today we have a very special show.

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<v Speaker 2>Co hosting with me is Tier one operator and the

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<v Speaker 2>co host of The Collective, which you can catch on

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<v Speaker 2>YouTube at eleven am Pacific every day of the week

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<v Speaker 2>kiding it every day, seven days of the week. His

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<v Speaker 2>name is Sean Taylor.

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<v Speaker 3>Welcome Sean, Hey, great to be back. Thanks for inviting

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<v Speaker 3>me into this conversation.

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<v Speaker 2>Buddy, thank you very much for being here. Folks. You

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<v Speaker 2>might have heard him and Master Corporal Chants Burls in

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<v Speaker 2>our last interview. But today we have somebody who's returning

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<v Speaker 2>as well, but its returning is Green Beray Ryan Hendrickson.

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<v Speaker 2>He'll be here shortly and we're going to be talking

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<v Speaker 2>a little bit about his story it's amazing really, and

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<v Speaker 2>then we'll be talking about resilience and a whole lot more.

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<v Speaker 2>So before I get started, you know what to do, share, subscribe,

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<v Speaker 2>hit that like button and join us. Now as we

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<v Speaker 2>go into the green room, talk a little bit about

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<v Speaker 2>resilience before Ryan gets here. So Sean resilient to something

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<v Speaker 2>that's kind of interesting. There's two things I always see

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<v Speaker 2>in the world of trauma that you don't see a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of I guess me phrase it that way. And

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<v Speaker 2>two of the things I don't see is usually protective factors,

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<v Speaker 2>which is usually the opposite of a lot of the

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<v Speaker 2>factors that cause problems. And some of you can control,

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<v Speaker 2>some you can't, obviously, But and then the other one

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<v Speaker 2>is resilience. And this is the one I guess we'll

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<v Speaker 2>be talking a little bit about today, and we'll probably

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<v Speaker 2>cover a little bit of protective factors too, because I

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<v Speaker 2>like to explore that. And now pabably ask Ryan what

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<v Speaker 2>he thinks something what happened to him during his development,

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<v Speaker 2>during his early years that might have helped him he

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<v Speaker 2>so resilient and whenever he overcame, But what do you

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<v Speaker 2>think about resilience?

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<v Speaker 3>Well, before I give my opinion on resilience, which is

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<v Speaker 3>a great topic to discuss, I'm curious as to how

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<v Speaker 3>you would define protective measures or protective portions I'm assuming

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<v Speaker 3>coping mechanisms to some degree or or how would you

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<v Speaker 3>define that?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, protective book factors would actually how would you say,

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<v Speaker 2>increase the efficacy of coping mechanisms. I always say there's

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<v Speaker 2>three things I might approach you before coping mechanisms, support systems,

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<v Speaker 2>and resources. Resources are the easiest now, thankfully fifty years

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<v Speaker 2>ago is a lot harder. So we'll just stay focused

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<v Speaker 2>with trauma for instance, trauma, PTSD, whatever it may be,

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<v Speaker 2>and resources a lot more now. So if you're a

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<v Speaker 2>victim of domestic violence, of shelters, if you're PTSD, there's

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<v Speaker 2>places to go. Support system that's the hardest. We'll get

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<v Speaker 2>to that in a second. Coping skills are the one

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<v Speaker 2>you usually therapists will help you with if not, parents

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<v Speaker 2>can if they've raised you accordingly, And I'll talk about

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<v Speaker 2>that a minute form the protective factors. But the third

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<v Speaker 2>one support system is the toughest one is do you

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<v Speaker 2>have those friends that really can how you talked about

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<v Speaker 2>this on the collective about the social connection engaging with individuals,

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<v Speaker 2>but it's not just simply engaging with somebody's actually somebody

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<v Speaker 2>who really I don't care what you tell me, Sean,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm still your friend. You all have something, and those

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<v Speaker 2>aren't that many.

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<v Speaker 3>That's true.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, you tell somebody something and all of a sudden, shit,

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<v Speaker 2>this guy's going to turn on me, or she is

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<v Speaker 2>or whatever it is, and then they're going to turn

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<v Speaker 2>and or they're going to look at me differently now,

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<v Speaker 2>And that's a problem. That's not really an unconditional type

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<v Speaker 2>of Christianity. He likes to use a conditional love. For instance,

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<v Speaker 2>that's gone and for human beings, we tend to want that,

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<v Speaker 2>even as children want this unconditional love from our parents.

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<v Speaker 2>And I think that's where the protective factors. One of

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<v Speaker 2>the protective factors is having parenting, good parenting. And this

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<v Speaker 2>could be single bombs. I know people are going to say, oh,

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<v Speaker 2>it just have to be both families. Doesn't have to be.

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<v Speaker 2>It's much easier if you have both parents, But those

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<v Speaker 2>are one of the major protective factors. Teaching them is

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<v Speaker 2>one of the key things about parents. So if it

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<v Speaker 2>gets a phone call and they're upset about something, how

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<v Speaker 2>does the parent handle it in front of that four

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<v Speaker 2>or five year old. These are early lessons that they

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<v Speaker 2>started learning. Well, dad's flipping at him, yelling, he's smashing things,

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<v Speaker 2>he's hitting mob whatever it may be that's not protected.

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<v Speaker 2>But dad says, you know what stuff happens ticket as

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<v Speaker 2>it goes go with the blows, roll along with it.

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<v Speaker 2>We learn from our mistakes and learn from this d D.

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<v Speaker 2>And they start explaining that. One of the things plugs

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<v Speaker 2>me the mostions when you see parents sometimes in the

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<v Speaker 2>grocery store where the kids throwing the cereal box all

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<v Speaker 2>over the place and the parent yells of them not

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<v Speaker 2>to do it, and then grabs them and takes them away.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm looking at it, going, she didn't tell them?

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<v Speaker 2>Why you didn't tell them? It was the kicks that think,

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<v Speaker 2>maybe it's just cereal boxes. I just grab the oatmeal

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<v Speaker 2>box and throw that. He has no idea what the

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<v Speaker 2>heck is going on, So there's no understanding of why

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<v Speaker 2>you don't do this because it hurts other people. This

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<v Speaker 2>is why you don't smack other kids in the head

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<v Speaker 2>when you're five. That says so. Protective factors are that

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<v Speaker 2>good moral values taught by the family, love staying away.

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<v Speaker 2>Obviously for substance us that's another one. It's the opposite

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<v Speaker 2>really of anything that's going to lead into making the

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<v Speaker 2>individual handle trauma effectively. Trauma.

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<v Speaker 3>That's a that's a good that's a good lead in

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<v Speaker 3>for an idea that I've been considering recently. I didn't

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<v Speaker 3>know that. I haven't really considered it in the way

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<v Speaker 3>that you just put it across. But it's something that

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<v Speaker 3>I'm actively pursuing with the collective. And so to your point,

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<v Speaker 3>if if someone never learned how to do these things

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<v Speaker 3>when they're a kid, which I didn't, I wasn't I

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<v Speaker 3>didn't learn these things. I wasn't taught these things. I

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<v Speaker 3>didn't know how to do, uh, these kind of things. Well,

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<v Speaker 3>but I've I've started to learn how to do them better.

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<v Speaker 3>I now do it better, I feel. And it's we're

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<v Speaker 3>trying to demonstrate over on the collective. And I know this,

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<v Speaker 3>this is not a shameless plug. I had no intention

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<v Speaker 3>of talking about the collective per se. But we're trying

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<v Speaker 3>to demonstrate how to connect with humans on a deeper

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<v Speaker 3>level now, how to communicate in a more effective way

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<v Speaker 3>so that we can feel the love for each other

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<v Speaker 3>to some degree. And if we weren't getting those connections

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<v Speaker 3>in our childhood, we can get those as adults. But

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<v Speaker 3>you've got to go find the right places to get

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<v Speaker 3>these connections. And I'm not talking about connections on a

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<v Speaker 3>shallow level. I'm talking on a much much deeper level

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<v Speaker 3>where you allow that person to express themselves and then

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<v Speaker 3>through that expression, you can dive deeper into those expressive moments.

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<v Speaker 3>I feel that it's really powerful when you can connect

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<v Speaker 3>with people who not only care, but it's a communal

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<v Speaker 3>car ring. So one on one sort of situation can

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<v Speaker 3>be powerful, but a group connection, I feel, is much

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<v Speaker 3>more powerful. So again back over to the collective, we're

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<v Speaker 3>really trying to connect on a deeper level as humans.

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<v Speaker 3>It's a powerful thing.

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<v Speaker 2>Absolutely. I think it's great that you bring that up, because, again, folks,

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<v Speaker 2>I feel like the collective and I are connecting in

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<v Speaker 2>different ways and it's really funny. So I have no problems,

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<v Speaker 2>and you know before I've plugged other podcasts as well,

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<v Speaker 2>but I think it's a great podcast because it generates

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<v Speaker 2>conversations for me, it makes me seek out other individuals

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<v Speaker 2>and maybe vice versa as well.

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<v Speaker 3>For sure, we're really benefiting from hanging out with you.

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<v Speaker 3>As I'd mentioned to you just before we went into

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<v Speaker 3>this recording, I really appreciate the depth of knowledge that

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<v Speaker 3>you bring on a technical level, but also you've spoken

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<v Speaker 3>to so many people on so many subjects at a

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<v Speaker 3>deeper level that you have an innate, deep wisdom within you.

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<v Speaker 3>That is a multi factorial combination of all of your

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<v Speaker 3>stories that you've listened to and all of the relaying

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<v Speaker 3>of information to a variety of individuals. You need to

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<v Speaker 3>listen and talk to so many people over the course

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<v Speaker 3>of your life that to become better, and you have

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<v Speaker 3>done that not only through your professional career, but in

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<v Speaker 3>your own personal time through podcasting. To communicate better and

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<v Speaker 3>to listen better, you have to do it more.

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<v Speaker 2>So, thank you very much. You know what's one of

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<v Speaker 2>the interesting things I always tell the students is that

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<v Speaker 2>I've found out over the years that human behaviors everywhere

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<v Speaker 2>and every discipline, that they look at it differently. And

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<v Speaker 2>that's why I got it so involved in so many podcasts.

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<v Speaker 2>Because there's behavioral economics that look at how we behave

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<v Speaker 2>with money and that varies, and how we havethropology, sociology, criminology,

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<v Speaker 2>and then this world's psychology and you have different levels

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<v Speaker 2>of that, and it's sports psychology as well. There's just

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<v Speaker 2>so many facets of understanding human be here. Even physics

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<v Speaker 2>gets in the way. Everybody joins in the game, right, chemistry, physics, nutrition,

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<v Speaker 2>everything plays. So for me, it's been a wonderful journey

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<v Speaker 2>just to be able to talk to people and learn

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<v Speaker 2>just like ourselves. The show is interesting because I get

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<v Speaker 2>more of a almost like a qualitative study. I get

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<v Speaker 2>a bunch of people that I can listen to, hear

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<v Speaker 2>their stories and see how they're viewing the world. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it's not a research study like a quantitative one. You're

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<v Speaker 2>not getting a controlled study. But still I get to

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<v Speaker 2>hear the anecdotes that are coming out. How's like Tanya,

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<v Speaker 2>for instance, very insightful individual. I know she's doing something,

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<v Speaker 2>she's up to something, she knows something out there, she's

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<v Speaker 2>been doing research, and she's passionate about topics. Sev is

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<v Speaker 2>another one we talked about before. He has a lot

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<v Speaker 2>of insight too. So back to resilience. I've always liked

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<v Speaker 2>the the simple ter definition of bouncing back, the ability

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<v Speaker 2>to kind of bounce back from a situation. And I

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<v Speaker 2>grew up. I'm a little younger than you. It looks

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<v Speaker 2>better than I'm a little younger than you, but I

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<v Speaker 2>remember listening to watching Actually, sorry, folks, I don't plugging

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<v Speaker 2>my own, so hopefully the quality is better now.

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<v Speaker 3>Sounds tight.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, we don't do much with editing around here. Well,

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<v Speaker 2>Rocky was one of my first experiences with resilience. Everybody's

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<v Speaker 2>probably seen the movie or a lot most people at

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<v Speaker 2>least listen to this podcast depending where you're from, but

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<v Speaker 2>even other countries have caught up. Now I've watched a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of them. But the ability of him to come

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<v Speaker 2>back from Apollo Creed, the ability from the guy to

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<v Speaker 2>come from nothing to go somewhere, and we've seen it

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<v Speaker 2>constantly and the mma boxing, and that to me takes

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<v Speaker 2>the special quality of an individual because there's a difference

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<v Speaker 2>there between them and other individuals that are not champions.

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<v Speaker 2>It's that ability to say, Okay, I got knocked out,

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<v Speaker 2>but I got to get back up and I got

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<v Speaker 2>to get to my goals somehow. However, that is I

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<v Speaker 2>don't know, what do you think about that? Did you

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<v Speaker 2>like Rocky?

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<v Speaker 3>I did? I did, And as you mentioned that movie,

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<v Speaker 3>I was already preliminary considering how I would best use

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<v Speaker 3>an example. Rocky didn't come to mind. But it was

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<v Speaker 3>a combination of No movie came to mind. It was

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<v Speaker 3>just simply a combination of the observations that I've had

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<v Speaker 3>throughout my life of other individuals, real humans on our planet,

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<v Speaker 3>not actors. Even though the movie Rocky acts as a

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<v Speaker 3>great representation of all the humans out there on the

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<v Speaker 3>planet who are resilient. And I think the first thoughts

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<v Speaker 3>that come to mind are breaking it down into the

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<v Speaker 3>individual domains of are we talking physiologically resilient, mentally resilient,

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<v Speaker 3>emotionally resilient? Or are we talking about all three? Is

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<v Speaker 3>the perfect multi dimensional combination of resilience. It's a really

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<v Speaker 3>interesting question. So which one would you like to speak

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<v Speaker 3>about first?

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<v Speaker 2>Actually, know what We're going to stop the green room folks,

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<v Speaker 2>and we're going to bring in our guest. Fantastic welcome

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<v Speaker 2>back everybody, were I guess is here Ryan Hendrickson. I

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<v Speaker 2>mentioned him earlier. The book is called Tip of the Spear.

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<v Speaker 2>Incredible Story, and I'm not kidding it. It really is the

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<v Speaker 2>incredible story of an injured green Berets return to battle.

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<v Speaker 2>This is the story that really defies the odds. You

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<v Speaker 2>just don't hear what happened to him and he just

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<v Speaker 2>goes back to battle. Amazing story. Nonetheless, you can learn

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<v Speaker 2>more about him over at the Tip of the Spear

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<v Speaker 2>the book, great book, and catch him also on Instagram. Actually,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna have to ask him his handle on Instagram

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<v Speaker 2>because I don't have his hand on, but we'll get

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<v Speaker 2>to that a minute. Also check out line landmine Removal

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<v Speaker 2>dot org Landmine Removal dot org. You're probably wondering what

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<v Speaker 2>that is. Well, we're going to talk about that a

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<v Speaker 2>little bit later on in the show. Let's not wasting

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<v Speaker 2>any more time and welcome to the show, Ryan Henderson.

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<v Speaker 2>Welcome back, Ryan.

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<v Speaker 4>Hey, I appreciate you guys having me back on.

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<v Speaker 2>Definitely, thank you very much for what you're doing as

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<v Speaker 2>well in the Ukraine. I mean that's extremely honorable. Maybe

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<v Speaker 2>we'll start off with that. Tell us a little bit

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<v Speaker 2>about landmine removal dot org because that's right now. You've

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<v Speaker 2>been doing this for what is it almost a year.

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<v Speaker 4>Over here.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah, we So I started going over to Ukraine last March.

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<v Speaker 5>The mission there was to evacuate civilians out of areas

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<v Speaker 5>that the Russians were moving into. As the Russians started

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<v Speaker 5>to move east, civilians started going back to their homes

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<v Speaker 5>and hitting uh land mines, booby traps, explosive devices and

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<v Speaker 5>stuff like that. So yeah, as you know, as as

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<v Speaker 5>civilians started to come back to kind of survey the

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<v Speaker 5>damage she was left of their livelihoods, they're they're getting

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<v Speaker 5>you know, they're getting hit and from what we call

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<v Speaker 5>the leave behinds or the you know, just the the

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<v Speaker 5>land mines and all that other stuff that the Russians

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<v Speaker 5>put out there to slow the Ukrainian forces down. It's it's,

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<v Speaker 5>you know, pretty pretty typical where hey, we're we're we're

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<v Speaker 5>moving east.

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<v Speaker 4>Now we're gonna mine everything in our path.

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<v Speaker 5>To slow down the the the counter offensive or whatever,

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<v Speaker 5>you know, whatever you want to call it, the pursuit,

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<v Speaker 5>I guess for lack of better words. And but in

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<v Speaker 5>the end it's you know, civilians get caught up in

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<v Speaker 5>that too, and so there was a lot of casualties

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<v Speaker 5>being taken. And that's when you know, I I decided

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<v Speaker 5>I was going to try and help out as much

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<v Speaker 5>as I could their last April in May. And you know,

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<v Speaker 5>just from my background as a eighteen Charlie Special Forces engineer,

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<v Speaker 5>I've definitely found my fair share of IDs and minds

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<v Speaker 5>in Afghanistan. So I decided, you know, just for first

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<v Speaker 5>first thing I was going to do was was awareness

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<v Speaker 5>for the children. Don't grab this, don't touch this if

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<v Speaker 5>you see this, report this stuff like that. Trying to

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<v Speaker 5>keep these kids safe because you know, PFM one butterfly

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<v Speaker 5>mine looks looks like a fun toy to play with,

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<v Speaker 5>and then that's then that's it for your your hand

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<v Speaker 5>or your arm or whatever. So started off as awareness

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<v Speaker 5>and then training. A lot of the Ukrainian forces were

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<v Speaker 5>not really sure how to use handheld detectors, sweeping techniques,

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<v Speaker 5>clearance techniques, stuff like that. So I kind of moved

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<v Speaker 5>into that when I had time, because I was also

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<v Speaker 5>simultaneously working with a missionary group bringing food and medical

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<v Speaker 5>aid out to areas that the Russians have just left,

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<v Speaker 5>and so we were we would go in and try

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<v Speaker 5>and help them out the best that we could. So

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<v Speaker 5>and then from there it turned into okay, yeah, I

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<v Speaker 5>can I can train these guys advise them in a system.

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<v Speaker 5>So I went home in middle of May, and then

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<v Speaker 5>I came back in August and I linked up with

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<v Speaker 5>the group and we started doing we started doing battle

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<v Speaker 5>area clearance in farm fields so the farmers could you know,

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<v Speaker 5>get back out there, start cutting harvests and stuff like that.

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<v Speaker 5>It and so basically, you know, I did what Green

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<v Speaker 5>Bereys do best, trained up a group of Ukrainians and

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<v Speaker 5>then advised them on the minefield and assisted them on

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<v Speaker 5>the minefield. And then all the equipment that I brought over,

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<v Speaker 5>I donated it all over to them. And you know

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<v Speaker 5>that that was when I realized like, yeah, I can

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<v Speaker 5>I can actually do this. I could do the trained

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<v Speaker 5>advice assists bring over detectors, remote pole equipment, safety equipment,

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<v Speaker 5>medical equipment.

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<v Speaker 4>I can. I can bring all this over. I can

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<v Speaker 4>train these guys up on it.

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<v Speaker 5>I can go and d mine with them, which is

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<v Speaker 5>my way of vetting the unit, making sure that they

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<v Speaker 5>are going to actually use the equipment for humanitarian d mining.

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<v Speaker 5>And then I donated over to them. That gets me

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<v Speaker 5>out in the minefield. I get to have some fun too,

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<v Speaker 5>and we and we're we're pulling land mines and and

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<v Speaker 5>you know, we're we're making areas safe for the the

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<v Speaker 5>civilians so they don't have to worry about their next

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<v Speaker 5>step or you know that that tractor he doesn't have

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<v Speaker 5>to worry about, you know, rolling over that mine and

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<v Speaker 5>and stuff like that. So that turned into the five

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<v Speaker 5>oh one C three tip of the Spirit landmine removal.

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<v Speaker 5>And yeah, I went back again November December to uh

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<v Speaker 5>here Sun region and then April to July. All Right,

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<v Speaker 5>I'm sorry April to.

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<v Speaker 4>Late June.

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<v Speaker 5>I got home, like think the twenty eighth of June,

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<v Speaker 5>twenty ninth of June, but and all that was up

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<v Speaker 5>in Harkiev region and just landmine removal doing a doing

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<v Speaker 5>some some good work, helping some people out, donating some equipment,

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<v Speaker 5>and and yeah, having some fun.

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<v Speaker 2>So remind everybody against landmine Removal dot org. I think

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<v Speaker 2>you're down playing how important the work is that you're doing.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, to me, it's inportally amazing that I haven't

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<v Speaker 2>seen anything I don't think on any of mean major

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<v Speaker 2>news network is about these landmines being left behind and

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<v Speaker 2>innocent children and people just being victims to this is

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<v Speaker 2>incredible to me. They talk about a lot of other stuff,

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<v Speaker 2>but this is another one that should have been highlighted too.

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<v Speaker 2>I guess my first question before I hand it over

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<v Speaker 2>to Sean is well, you and I have, first of all,

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<v Speaker 2>have different definitions of fun. I was gonna have some

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<v Speaker 2>fun to get out there. It's like, all right, right,

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<v Speaker 2>but what motivated you really? What was the impact that

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<v Speaker 2>had was it all your years as a Green Ray?

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<v Speaker 2>What was it that said I got to get out

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<v Speaker 2>here and help these people.

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<v Speaker 5>So the number one motivator for me was the fact

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<v Speaker 5>that I've stepped on I stepped on an ied in Afghanistan,

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<v Speaker 5>and I know the pain and I know the life

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<v Speaker 5>changing circumstances that come comes as after a fairly traumatic

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<v Speaker 5>incident like that or or situation, I guess you would say.

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<v Speaker 5>And so as i'm you know, as I'm seeing and

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<v Speaker 5>I'm I'm hearing reports and civilians, mainly, you know, children,

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<v Speaker 5>whether it's Afghanistan or Iraq or Ukraine. But that's you know,

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<v Speaker 5>children don't need to go through that. I mean, nobody,

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<v Speaker 5>nobody needs to, but especially children.

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<v Speaker 2>They don't.

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<v Speaker 4>They don't need to have their lives, you know, basically.

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<v Speaker 5>Destroyed or changed, catastrophically changed through through a landmine. I

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<v Speaker 5>think destroys the wrong word, because you could, you could,

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<v Speaker 5>you know, be, you can make your you you could

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<v Speaker 5>do a lot of great things in life, regardless of

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<v Speaker 5>the situation, injury or circumstance that you're under. So destroyed

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<v Speaker 5>was the wrong word. But a catastrophic injury like that,

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<v Speaker 5>it changes your life. And especially when you're just a

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<v Speaker 5>kid and you're kind of you just want to go

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<v Speaker 5>out there and play and be a kid in this

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<v Speaker 5>warm you know, in this war torn country and and

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<v Speaker 5>you know, you have I mean, there's there's just tons

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<v Speaker 5>and tons and tons of instances of kids stepping on

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<v Speaker 5>anti personnel minds, picking up those PFM one butterfly minds,

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<v Speaker 5>and there's not a lot of reporting about it because

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<v Speaker 5>it's it is it's the ugly part of war and

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<v Speaker 5>and people don't have the stomach for it. People don't

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<v Speaker 5>you know, the it's just it's heartbreaking, especially when it

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<v Speaker 5>comes to the children. But yeah, that was that was

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<v Speaker 5>my drive to get over there and do what I

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<v Speaker 5>was doing. Was because I mean, it goes back to

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<v Speaker 5>September twelfth, twenty ten, when I stepped on my you know,

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<v Speaker 5>ID and it changed my life forever. And I know

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<v Speaker 5>that I could have I could have I could have

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<v Speaker 5>become a I could have became a victim of it,

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<v Speaker 5>and you know, you know, let that IED become you know,

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<v Speaker 5>who I was, and and and you know be you know,

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<v Speaker 5>and and let that I ed you know, my I

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<v Speaker 5>never you know, I could have been victimized and never

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<v Speaker 5>left September twelve, twenty ten. I could have you know

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<v Speaker 5>that that could have been me for the rest of

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<v Speaker 5>my life. But and I headed down that path for

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<v Speaker 5>a while. But I chose. I chose to use that

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<v Speaker 5>situation and in those dark times that I went through

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<v Speaker 5>and the mental struggles that I went through, I chose

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<v Speaker 5>to use all that to to make myself stronger, but

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<v Speaker 5>not for myself, but to but to help other people.

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<v Speaker 5>And and as I continued to help other people, it

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<v Speaker 5>gave me more strength and and and and that purpose,

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<v Speaker 5>that purpose that I needed as as a veteran that

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<v Speaker 5>worked at you know, a certain level.

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<v Speaker 4>And then I got out and it's like, who is

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<v Speaker 4>Ryan Henderson? What? What?

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<v Speaker 5>What is my purpose? What am I supposed to do?

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<v Speaker 5>I I don't even know who I am right now?

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<v Speaker 5>And I found it in Ukraine and it was it

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<v Speaker 5>was it was helping people. So yeah, that it all

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<v Speaker 5>just kind of came together for me. And yeah, it's

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<v Speaker 5>that it's that higher purpose of helping other people with

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<v Speaker 5>a little bit of danger, a little bit of excitement,

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<v Speaker 5>and and yeah, it's that's that was the ticket for me.

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<v Speaker 5>So and you're helping people, especially kids.

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<v Speaker 2>I can see. It was definitely personal, Sean, I guess

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<v Speaker 2>is a good segue to you.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, Holy moly, I think that what Ryan just dropped

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<v Speaker 3>there is so legit. I've heard it in a variety

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<v Speaker 3>of different ways from a variety of different veterans that

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<v Speaker 3>I've spoken to, But it's almost categorically picture perfect stated.

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<v Speaker 3>And I mean, I'd love to ask questions and I'd

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<v Speaker 3>love to add more, but I mean, that was such

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<v Speaker 3>a freaking mic drop. I'm not even sure where to

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<v Speaker 3>go with it.

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<v Speaker 2>No, I get it. You covered a lot of territory

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<v Speaker 2>in our.

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<v Speaker 3>There's no questions go forward, No, No, not at all.

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<v Speaker 3>I I I, well, I suppose I do have one

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<v Speaker 3>if I if I'm going to add some nuance to it. Ryan,

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<v Speaker 3>Now that you have formulated what works best for you

420
00:23:16.519 --> 00:23:22.400
<v Speaker 3>and you're you're demonstrating the resilience and the results that

421
00:23:22.400 --> 00:23:26.640
<v Speaker 3>that are making you happy, how best are you? Have

422
00:23:26.759 --> 00:23:29.960
<v Speaker 3>you started to engage with other veterans in a way

423
00:23:30.000 --> 00:23:34.200
<v Speaker 3>to expand that awareness or to demonstrate your path is

424
00:23:34.240 --> 00:23:36.880
<v Speaker 3>a good path and have other veterans pick up on

425
00:23:37.119 --> 00:23:40.279
<v Speaker 3>our traction, up on that uh that path forward?

426
00:23:41.559 --> 00:23:42.319
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, all the time.

427
00:23:42.400 --> 00:23:45.319
<v Speaker 5>I mean mental mental health is huge with me, especially

428
00:23:45.319 --> 00:23:49.480
<v Speaker 5>the crisis we have going on in the United States, England, Canada,

429
00:23:50.359 --> 00:23:53.079
<v Speaker 5>Australia mental health in the way that I'm not I'm

430
00:23:53.119 --> 00:23:55.799
<v Speaker 5>not going to go into how we left Afghanistan, but

431
00:23:55.880 --> 00:23:58.480
<v Speaker 5>it does segue into a lot of the mental health

432
00:23:58.519 --> 00:24:02.200
<v Speaker 5>crisis we have going on right now. I do I

433
00:24:02.759 --> 00:24:06.160
<v Speaker 5>talk to veterans and and and first responders whoever's going

434
00:24:06.240 --> 00:24:10.759
<v Speaker 5>to listen. I do talk about having that purpose and

435
00:24:11.079 --> 00:24:13.160
<v Speaker 5>but the biggest thing is there there's a lot of

436
00:24:13.160 --> 00:24:16.599
<v Speaker 5>tough love that goes with with with taking charge your

437
00:24:16.640 --> 00:24:20.400
<v Speaker 5>mental health. And that tough love is nobody owes you shit,

438
00:24:21.400 --> 00:24:25.319
<v Speaker 5>and and and so and what veterans have a you

439
00:24:25.359 --> 00:24:28.680
<v Speaker 5>know what what they have in let me let me

440
00:24:28.720 --> 00:24:31.079
<v Speaker 5>see all I say. One of the issues that I

441
00:24:31.119 --> 00:24:35.440
<v Speaker 5>see veterans haveing right now is a sense of entitlement

442
00:24:35.559 --> 00:24:38.799
<v Speaker 5>because of there because of the you know, their service

443
00:24:38.880 --> 00:24:39.599
<v Speaker 5>to this country.

444
00:24:40.200 --> 00:24:42.480
<v Speaker 4>And so you'll be and you'll hear it.

445
00:24:42.519 --> 00:24:45.839
<v Speaker 5>You you know, I served the country, I protected your freedoms,

446
00:24:45.880 --> 00:24:48.599
<v Speaker 5>your way of life, you know, filling all filling all

447
00:24:48.599 --> 00:24:52.200
<v Speaker 5>the blanks that you want. So what happens now is

448
00:24:52.400 --> 00:24:54.960
<v Speaker 5>veterans become you know, and I'm not saying all veterans,

449
00:24:55.000 --> 00:24:58.400
<v Speaker 5>but I see this trend in the veteran community is

450
00:24:58.440 --> 00:25:01.319
<v Speaker 5>that there is this sense of there's this sense of

451
00:25:02.160 --> 00:25:07.240
<v Speaker 5>entitlement that turns into a victimization. And that victimization is

452
00:25:07.839 --> 00:25:11.400
<v Speaker 5>when your titlement, when your entitlement void. You know that

453
00:25:11.599 --> 00:25:14.599
<v Speaker 5>that hole in you that can't be filled by anybody

454
00:25:14.599 --> 00:25:18.400
<v Speaker 5>but yourself, But it's this entitlement void. When you can't

455
00:25:18.440 --> 00:25:21.000
<v Speaker 5>get that filled, there's no thank you for your service

456
00:25:21.039 --> 00:25:22.279
<v Speaker 5>at Applebee's that's.

457
00:25:22.079 --> 00:25:23.440
<v Speaker 4>Ever going to fill that void.

458
00:25:24.079 --> 00:25:28.079
<v Speaker 5>When when you can't get that void filled, you become

459
00:25:28.119 --> 00:25:31.359
<v Speaker 5>a victim of it. Nobody understands me, nobody respects what

460
00:25:31.400 --> 00:25:33.440
<v Speaker 5>I did. They don't know what I've done for them,

461
00:25:33.519 --> 00:25:36.640
<v Speaker 5>And then you become a victim of this entitlement. And

462
00:25:36.680 --> 00:25:39.200
<v Speaker 5>it's not just veterans. The United States is full of victims.

463
00:25:39.240 --> 00:25:43.440
<v Speaker 5>Oh my gosh, watch the news. But you become a

464
00:25:43.519 --> 00:25:48.480
<v Speaker 5>victim of your perceived entitlement, of what you think you

465
00:25:48.640 --> 00:25:51.480
<v Speaker 5>did for everybody around you, or the level that you

466
00:25:51.559 --> 00:25:52.240
<v Speaker 5>operated at.

467
00:25:52.319 --> 00:25:54.720
<v Speaker 4>You have no idea what I've done. Well, of course

468
00:25:54.720 --> 00:25:55.039
<v Speaker 4>they don't.

469
00:25:55.039 --> 00:25:56.839
<v Speaker 5>They weren't there, and even if they were there, they

470
00:25:56.880 --> 00:25:59.640
<v Speaker 5>weren'tn't you, So then you become a victim of it

471
00:25:59.680 --> 00:26:01.359
<v Speaker 5>at And as you become a victim of it, you

472
00:26:01.400 --> 00:26:04.440
<v Speaker 5>start to push people away, and people will try and

473
00:26:04.519 --> 00:26:07.279
<v Speaker 5>Russian to help you, and you'll push people away, push

474
00:26:07.279 --> 00:26:10.880
<v Speaker 5>people away, push people away until you're all alone. And

475
00:26:10.920 --> 00:26:13.880
<v Speaker 5>then that's when that's when veterans are making really really

476
00:26:13.920 --> 00:26:18.960
<v Speaker 5>bad decisions and because they're trying to fill that entitlement

477
00:26:19.039 --> 00:26:22.720
<v Speaker 5>void in their life with that quick fix, and that's

478
00:26:22.839 --> 00:26:28.160
<v Speaker 5>usually alcohol, drugs, or something else. So that's what I

479
00:26:28.200 --> 00:26:30.720
<v Speaker 5>talk to you know people about it is you you

480
00:26:30.880 --> 00:26:34.200
<v Speaker 5>have to take control. There's a lot of help out there,

481
00:26:34.200 --> 00:26:37.279
<v Speaker 5>but nobody is going to hold your hands all the

482
00:26:37.279 --> 00:26:38.359
<v Speaker 5>way through the process.

483
00:26:38.519 --> 00:26:41.000
<v Speaker 4>You have to take control of your own life.

484
00:26:41.440 --> 00:26:44.200
<v Speaker 5>And the best way to take control over your life

485
00:26:44.240 --> 00:26:46.039
<v Speaker 5>is to find that higher purpose.

486
00:26:46.480 --> 00:26:50.200
<v Speaker 4>Who are you? What can I do? And usually in

487
00:26:50.279 --> 00:26:51.599
<v Speaker 4>my experience.

488
00:26:51.559 --> 00:26:56.640
<v Speaker 5>There is not a lot of fulfilled people out there

489
00:26:56.759 --> 00:27:01.880
<v Speaker 5>that have just focused on me. It's usually people that

490
00:27:02.079 --> 00:27:06.920
<v Speaker 5>understand the we over me. And once you understand that,

491
00:27:07.400 --> 00:27:10.720
<v Speaker 5>you know, helping other people and and and and making

492
00:27:10.759 --> 00:27:14.359
<v Speaker 5>yourself vulnerable, not being afraid to fail, try new things

493
00:27:14.359 --> 00:27:16.240
<v Speaker 5>and get out there and find what your purpose is,

494
00:27:16.920 --> 00:27:19.119
<v Speaker 5>that's when you start to heal your life. And that's

495
00:27:19.160 --> 00:27:23.519
<v Speaker 5>when you start to you know, you start to fill

496
00:27:23.680 --> 00:27:28.559
<v Speaker 5>that entitlement void. And I mean to me, people say,

497
00:27:28.720 --> 00:27:31.039
<v Speaker 5>is there a cure? For PTS, and I say, yeah,

498
00:27:31.079 --> 00:27:33.920
<v Speaker 5>there is find a purpose that's bigger than yourself and

499
00:27:33.960 --> 00:27:34.880
<v Speaker 5>go and help people.

500
00:27:35.160 --> 00:27:35.799
<v Speaker 4>That's the cure.

501
00:27:37.480 --> 00:27:40.200
<v Speaker 5>But no I do I I reach you know if if,

502
00:27:40.240 --> 00:27:41.240
<v Speaker 5>if someone wants to.

503
00:27:41.200 --> 00:27:44.000
<v Speaker 4>Listen, I could talk to him about it.

504
00:27:44.039 --> 00:27:47.720
<v Speaker 5>But a lot of the times it's you know, it's

505
00:27:47.839 --> 00:27:50.680
<v Speaker 5>what are you doing to help yourself? You know, I

506
00:27:50.839 --> 00:27:53.000
<v Speaker 5>I got it here calling me all the time with

507
00:27:53.079 --> 00:27:56.279
<v Speaker 5>this issue, this issue, this issue. What are you doing

508
00:27:56.680 --> 00:27:59.160
<v Speaker 5>to take care of yourself? No one's going to do

509
00:27:59.200 --> 00:28:02.559
<v Speaker 5>it for you because guess what, as much as you

510
00:28:02.599 --> 00:28:04.480
<v Speaker 5>think you're owed something, you're not old shit.

511
00:28:06.000 --> 00:28:08.319
<v Speaker 4>It's just the facts of the matter, nobody the.

512
00:28:08.319 --> 00:28:12.519
<v Speaker 3>Facts of the matter. And you're like a younger, smarter

513
00:28:12.759 --> 00:28:16.480
<v Speaker 3>version of me, I think, because what you just said

514
00:28:16.559 --> 00:28:19.480
<v Speaker 3>is what I say all the time. You crystallized it

515
00:28:19.559 --> 00:28:24.720
<v Speaker 3>so well. So thanks for that. Now I understand the

516
00:28:24.720 --> 00:28:28.079
<v Speaker 3>main theme of how to get someone moving generally tends

517
00:28:28.079 --> 00:28:30.680
<v Speaker 3>to be you've got to give some tough love. And

518
00:28:30.920 --> 00:28:32.880
<v Speaker 3>if they're not willing to do it for themselves, and

519
00:28:32.920 --> 00:28:36.759
<v Speaker 3>if they do genuinely want help it, it's usually a

520
00:28:36.759 --> 00:28:39.480
<v Speaker 3>bit of a rocky road. They have to be prepared

521
00:28:39.519 --> 00:28:42.519
<v Speaker 3>to get some tough love. So have you found an

522
00:28:42.559 --> 00:28:47.240
<v Speaker 3>effective way to Obviously, you calibrate yourself to the individual.

523
00:28:47.319 --> 00:28:50.799
<v Speaker 3>You don't go in with a chain mail fist and

524
00:28:51.000 --> 00:28:53.680
<v Speaker 3>punch everyone straight in the face even if you don't

525
00:28:53.720 --> 00:28:57.559
<v Speaker 3>know them. So obviously you move your tough love around

526
00:28:57.559 --> 00:29:00.599
<v Speaker 3>a little bit. But have you found a I don't

527
00:29:00.599 --> 00:29:02.519
<v Speaker 3>want to say the most effective way, but a more

528
00:29:02.519 --> 00:29:05.319
<v Speaker 3>effective way that will hit the general population?

529
00:29:06.440 --> 00:29:07.559
<v Speaker 4>Yeah? Through my actions?

530
00:29:08.440 --> 00:29:09.160
<v Speaker 2>Beautiful?

531
00:29:09.279 --> 00:29:09.799
<v Speaker 4>Oh man?

532
00:29:10.160 --> 00:29:12.839
<v Speaker 3>Okay, I could just leave what is even going on

533
00:29:12.880 --> 00:29:14.240
<v Speaker 3>here right now? You're reading in my mind?

534
00:29:14.279 --> 00:29:14.440
<v Speaker 1>Or what?

535
00:29:15.319 --> 00:29:15.559
<v Speaker 4>Yeah?

536
00:29:15.640 --> 00:29:18.559
<v Speaker 5>People, you know, I mean, if you want to, if

537
00:29:18.599 --> 00:29:23.279
<v Speaker 5>you want to, I guess see why I say the

538
00:29:23.319 --> 00:29:25.880
<v Speaker 5>things that I do and why I guess you can say,

539
00:29:25.920 --> 00:29:28.519
<v Speaker 5>preach the way I do. Look at it through my actions,

540
00:29:28.759 --> 00:29:30.559
<v Speaker 5>look at it through my past. I mean, there was

541
00:29:30.599 --> 00:29:32.720
<v Speaker 5>a time in my life that I definitely could have

542
00:29:32.799 --> 00:29:35.400
<v Speaker 5>been one of the twenty two a day easily because

543
00:29:35.440 --> 00:29:38.319
<v Speaker 5>I didn't take control over my own life. Everybody else

544
00:29:38.359 --> 00:29:41.519
<v Speaker 5>owed me something except for me. Why, because look at

545
00:29:41.559 --> 00:29:43.519
<v Speaker 5>what I did for you? Look at all this. You

546
00:29:43.559 --> 00:29:45.640
<v Speaker 5>know I was a green beray blah blah blah blah blah,

547
00:29:45.640 --> 00:29:48.839
<v Speaker 5>and the list goes on. I didn't take responsibility of myself.

548
00:29:48.880 --> 00:29:51.839
<v Speaker 5>I thought I was owed something until I finally got

549
00:29:51.880 --> 00:29:55.079
<v Speaker 5>to such a low place in my life that it's like,

550
00:29:55.240 --> 00:29:57.720
<v Speaker 5>if I don't change, I'm not going to make it.

551
00:29:59.000 --> 00:30:01.720
<v Speaker 5>So it's not like i'm pret because I'm holier than thou.

552
00:30:01.839 --> 00:30:02.599
<v Speaker 4>I'm not at all.

553
00:30:02.880 --> 00:30:05.720
<v Speaker 5>I've been there, and it's not like I got this

554
00:30:06.319 --> 00:30:09.599
<v Speaker 5>revelation and I wake up every day and every every

555
00:30:09.640 --> 00:30:10.680
<v Speaker 5>day is fucking great.

556
00:30:10.759 --> 00:30:11.079
<v Speaker 4>It's not.

557
00:30:11.319 --> 00:30:14.039
<v Speaker 5>I continue to fall on my face and I continue

558
00:30:14.039 --> 00:30:17.240
<v Speaker 5>to fall into self induced pitfalls, and I have pity

559
00:30:17.279 --> 00:30:19.359
<v Speaker 5>parties and then I drag myself out of them.

560
00:30:19.799 --> 00:30:20.680
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, it's life.

561
00:30:21.000 --> 00:30:24.240
<v Speaker 5>Life is hard, and life could be ugly, and life

562
00:30:24.319 --> 00:30:26.759
<v Speaker 5>beats you down and it doesn't really it doesn't matter

563
00:30:26.799 --> 00:30:28.920
<v Speaker 5>all the great things you've done, and it doesn't matter

564
00:30:28.960 --> 00:30:30.319
<v Speaker 5>how many people you've helped.

565
00:30:31.680 --> 00:30:32.559
<v Speaker 4>None of that matters.

566
00:30:32.599 --> 00:30:34.720
<v Speaker 5>Life is still going to hit you with right hooks

567
00:30:35.880 --> 00:30:39.039
<v Speaker 5>all the time because it's life. And once you understand that,

568
00:30:39.200 --> 00:30:42.119
<v Speaker 5>and once you understand you're not owed anything, and once

569
00:30:42.119 --> 00:30:46.599
<v Speaker 5>you understand that helping people it is it is extremely therapeutic.

570
00:30:47.200 --> 00:30:49.480
<v Speaker 5>Then life starts to make sense and it becomes a

571
00:30:49.519 --> 00:30:52.279
<v Speaker 5>little bit easier and a little bit easier, and then

572
00:30:52.319 --> 00:30:54.480
<v Speaker 5>the next time you fall flat on your face, it's

573
00:30:54.519 --> 00:30:55.920
<v Speaker 5>a little bit easier to get up.

574
00:30:57.319 --> 00:30:57.680
<v Speaker 2>I don't know.

575
00:30:58.039 --> 00:31:00.839
<v Speaker 3>I agree, that's me. That's that's slightly how I run

576
00:31:00.920 --> 00:31:03.920
<v Speaker 3>my life. That's precisely how I try to explain it

577
00:31:03.920 --> 00:31:06.880
<v Speaker 3>to people. There is no there is no easy path,

578
00:31:07.279 --> 00:31:08.839
<v Speaker 3>and if you're on the easy path, you're on the

579
00:31:08.839 --> 00:31:13.519
<v Speaker 3>wrong path. And so life can be hard, and engaging

580
00:31:13.559 --> 00:31:17.240
<v Speaker 3>in that hard path is the only way to move

581
00:31:17.359 --> 00:31:21.000
<v Speaker 3>forward in a positive manner. Man I was in phases

582
00:31:21.000 --> 00:31:23.759
<v Speaker 3>of my life as well, where as you've described some

583
00:31:23.839 --> 00:31:26.960
<v Speaker 3>pretty low lows. And in order to look out and

584
00:31:27.000 --> 00:31:30.839
<v Speaker 3>see a brighter sun, you're more colorful world. It takes work,

585
00:31:31.400 --> 00:31:35.279
<v Speaker 3>and so obviously in order to explain that to someone

586
00:31:35.759 --> 00:31:37.680
<v Speaker 3>or line it out for someone, you've got to have

587
00:31:37.720 --> 00:31:40.240
<v Speaker 3>been there. You can't do it from a book. You've

588
00:31:40.279 --> 00:31:44.119
<v Speaker 3>got to do it from worldly experience, which obviously you have.

589
00:31:44.519 --> 00:31:49.039
<v Speaker 3>So when someone pushes back against your not your message

590
00:31:49.079 --> 00:31:53.200
<v Speaker 3>but your wisdom, do you just shrug your shoulders and

591
00:31:53.240 --> 00:31:55.279
<v Speaker 3>walk away, or do you do you take a different

592
00:31:55.400 --> 00:31:59.519
<v Speaker 3>tact or how do you face those kind of moments.

593
00:32:01.359 --> 00:32:03.440
<v Speaker 4>I'll be here when you I'll be here when you're ready,

594
00:32:03.759 --> 00:32:05.880
<v Speaker 4>all right, Nice you know right, I'll be here when

595
00:32:05.920 --> 00:32:06.359
<v Speaker 4>you're ready.

596
00:32:06.400 --> 00:32:11.000
<v Speaker 5>But there people need to understand there there is something

597
00:32:11.039 --> 00:32:14.079
<v Speaker 5>extremely therapeutic about understanding we over me.

598
00:32:14.839 --> 00:32:17.440
<v Speaker 4>There is not a lot of mes that are happy

599
00:32:17.480 --> 00:32:17.759
<v Speaker 4>in this.

600
00:32:17.839 --> 00:32:21.279
<v Speaker 5>Life, even regardless of how successful they are, regardless if

601
00:32:21.319 --> 00:32:24.200
<v Speaker 5>they think they're at the top looking down and they're

602
00:32:24.240 --> 00:32:26.799
<v Speaker 5>looking down on all these people that they think are

603
00:32:26.880 --> 00:32:29.440
<v Speaker 5>less than them, and they are happy and content and

604
00:32:29.440 --> 00:32:33.880
<v Speaker 5>fulfilled because they believe in the we over me. But no,

605
00:32:34.079 --> 00:32:37.920
<v Speaker 5>you can't force anything on a person. The minute you

606
00:32:38.039 --> 00:32:41.759
<v Speaker 5>become so invested into that person's misery, you're gonna you're

607
00:32:41.799 --> 00:32:43.160
<v Speaker 5>gonna get drugged down yourself.

608
00:32:43.880 --> 00:32:44.640
<v Speaker 4>You when you.

609
00:32:44.640 --> 00:32:47.880
<v Speaker 5>When you're when you're dealing with people and the mental health.

610
00:32:48.319 --> 00:32:51.400
<v Speaker 5>The best thing that you can do, besides being understanding

611
00:32:51.799 --> 00:32:54.640
<v Speaker 5>and having that tough love, you do have to take

612
00:32:54.720 --> 00:32:56.640
<v Speaker 5>charge of your own life. No one's going to take

613
00:32:56.680 --> 00:32:59.279
<v Speaker 5>charge of it for you. But the best thing that

614
00:32:59.319 --> 00:33:02.160
<v Speaker 5>you can do is to make sure that you remain

615
00:33:02.839 --> 00:33:06.960
<v Speaker 5>mentally healthy and happy or else, because you can't help

616
00:33:07.000 --> 00:33:10.359
<v Speaker 5>anybody out. Regardless of the great speeches you give on

617
00:33:10.720 --> 00:33:14.559
<v Speaker 5>you know, on whatever podcast it is, You're not helping

618
00:33:14.599 --> 00:33:16.200
<v Speaker 5>anybody out if you're miserable.

619
00:33:16.680 --> 00:33:18.680
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I agree, mm hmm.

620
00:33:18.960 --> 00:33:22.559
<v Speaker 4>So I I I can't. I don't entertain it as

621
00:33:22.640 --> 00:33:24.720
<v Speaker 4>just say, man, I'm you know, I'm here when you

622
00:33:24.759 --> 00:33:26.519
<v Speaker 4>need me. I'm here when you need me.

623
00:33:27.119 --> 00:33:29.799
<v Speaker 3>That's a great.

624
00:33:29.160 --> 00:33:33.039
<v Speaker 4>Because you got to stay mentally healthy yourself. You have to, Yeah,

625
00:33:33.440 --> 00:33:34.480
<v Speaker 4>in order.

626
00:33:34.359 --> 00:33:36.920
<v Speaker 3>To fight the fight, You've got to be prepared to

627
00:33:36.960 --> 00:33:38.640
<v Speaker 3>fight the good fight. And the only way to do

628
00:33:38.720 --> 00:33:41.000
<v Speaker 3>that is be good for yourself first before we can

629
00:33:41.039 --> 00:33:43.200
<v Speaker 3>go out and help others. But I it's a it's

630
00:33:43.200 --> 00:33:49.599
<v Speaker 3>a tricky balance and you're you're it is powerful to

631
00:33:49.640 --> 00:33:52.319
<v Speaker 3>be part of the Wii. It's it is powerful to

632
00:33:52.359 --> 00:33:54.359
<v Speaker 3>be part of a big team and want more for

633
00:33:54.440 --> 00:33:57.000
<v Speaker 3>the big team. But at the same time, you've got

634
00:33:57.039 --> 00:33:59.279
<v Speaker 3>to look after yourself. I'm not talking to you specifically,

635
00:33:59.319 --> 00:34:01.960
<v Speaker 3>I'm speaking to anyone who's listening. You need to look

636
00:34:02.000 --> 00:34:04.680
<v Speaker 3>after yourself to be strong for the Wei and finding

637
00:34:04.759 --> 00:34:08.079
<v Speaker 3>that right balance is a little different for everyone, would

638
00:34:08.119 --> 00:34:08.760
<v Speaker 3>you think.

639
00:34:09.639 --> 00:34:11.480
<v Speaker 4>Well, yeah, no, absolutely.

640
00:34:11.519 --> 00:34:16.920
<v Speaker 5>But the biggest thing people need to understand about taking

641
00:34:16.960 --> 00:34:19.920
<v Speaker 5>control over their life is it is extremely easy to

642
00:34:19.920 --> 00:34:23.039
<v Speaker 5>be a victim. Victimization is one of the easiest things

643
00:34:23.039 --> 00:34:25.880
<v Speaker 5>to do. It's everybody else's fault by yours. This is

644
00:34:25.960 --> 00:34:27.440
<v Speaker 5>the reason why I am the way I am. It

645
00:34:27.519 --> 00:34:30.119
<v Speaker 5>is because of you, guys. Being a victim is simple.

646
00:34:30.239 --> 00:34:33.400
<v Speaker 5>You have to understand that because taking control of your

647
00:34:33.440 --> 00:34:36.519
<v Speaker 5>life is hard. It is very hard to be To

648
00:34:36.599 --> 00:34:39.760
<v Speaker 5>take control over your life and to actually own it,

649
00:34:40.119 --> 00:34:45.599
<v Speaker 5>own your decisions, own your mindset, own it and actively

650
00:34:46.000 --> 00:34:50.360
<v Speaker 5>try to help yourself. That's extremely difficult. What's really easy

651
00:34:50.559 --> 00:34:52.280
<v Speaker 5>is becoming a victim. That's why we have so many

652
00:34:52.360 --> 00:34:54.039
<v Speaker 5>victims in America today. It's simple.

653
00:34:54.800 --> 00:34:57.400
<v Speaker 3>Well, it's the same up here in Canada. And funnily enough,

654
00:34:58.239 --> 00:35:02.079
<v Speaker 3>I'm up at a drop zone right now. I'm about

655
00:35:02.119 --> 00:35:05.119
<v Speaker 3>nearly a thousand kilometers away from my hometown. I'm out

656
00:35:05.119 --> 00:35:07.920
<v Speaker 3>here with my son, and the drop zone that I'm

657
00:35:07.960 --> 00:35:11.599
<v Speaker 3>at is it's a gathering for this whole week of veterans.

658
00:35:11.920 --> 00:35:14.719
<v Speaker 3>And last night there was a mental health talk by

659
00:35:14.760 --> 00:35:17.800
<v Speaker 3>a mental health professional, we'll call it. And as he

660
00:35:17.880 --> 00:35:22.119
<v Speaker 3>was describing, and I fully agree, the biggest problem out

661
00:35:22.159 --> 00:35:25.039
<v Speaker 3>there is a lot of veterans are really angry at

662
00:35:25.039 --> 00:35:29.119
<v Speaker 3>everything else but themselves. They're eager to point the finger

663
00:35:29.119 --> 00:35:31.199
<v Speaker 3>at the guy down the street, the guy on the TV,

664
00:35:31.400 --> 00:35:34.119
<v Speaker 3>the guy on the commercial, the guy at the car wash.

665
00:35:34.199 --> 00:35:37.440
<v Speaker 3>It doesn't much matter. It's everyone else's fault. They're angry

666
00:35:37.480 --> 00:35:40.960
<v Speaker 3>with everyone not giving them the respect, not giving them

667
00:35:41.000 --> 00:35:44.599
<v Speaker 3>the nod, and not giving them the free coffee, whatever

668
00:35:44.639 --> 00:35:48.599
<v Speaker 3>it is. They don't feel like the world is giving

669
00:35:48.639 --> 00:35:52.639
<v Speaker 3>them what they deserve, when it's quite the opposite. You

670
00:35:52.719 --> 00:35:56.119
<v Speaker 3>deserve nothing. What you deserve to do is give more

671
00:35:56.159 --> 00:35:59.239
<v Speaker 3>of yourself for the team. And the moment that you

672
00:35:59.320 --> 00:36:03.639
<v Speaker 3>can shift the anger away from the world and shift

673
00:36:04.000 --> 00:36:08.239
<v Speaker 3>the focus into your own internal world, that's the moment

674
00:36:08.320 --> 00:36:09.960
<v Speaker 3>that you can start to get a little bit better.

675
00:36:10.000 --> 00:36:13.559
<v Speaker 3>Stop laying the blame elsewhere, start looking at your own

676
00:36:13.599 --> 00:36:16.000
<v Speaker 3>feet and lay the blame right there. You don't have

677
00:36:16.039 --> 00:36:19.280
<v Speaker 3>to be really tough on yourself, but it is tough

678
00:36:19.360 --> 00:36:22.800
<v Speaker 3>love over a period of time. I think that the

679
00:36:22.880 --> 00:36:26.639
<v Speaker 3>responsibility that we all have is to own up to

680
00:36:26.719 --> 00:36:30.920
<v Speaker 3>our own nonsense, get right with the program, and then

681
00:36:31.000 --> 00:36:35.079
<v Speaker 3>start delivering more good out into the world for the team.

682
00:36:35.400 --> 00:36:35.639
<v Speaker 2>Yep.

683
00:36:35.880 --> 00:36:39.480
<v Speaker 5>Entitlement is very, very dangerous. It is very dangerous road

684
00:36:39.519 --> 00:36:42.719
<v Speaker 5>to go on. It is very once you become so entitled,

685
00:36:42.840 --> 00:36:44.159
<v Speaker 5>is very hard to undo it.

686
00:36:44.800 --> 00:36:47.440
<v Speaker 3>Trust me, true, it is true. And by the way,

687
00:36:47.840 --> 00:36:51.320
<v Speaker 3>one way to improve in that area. One way to

688
00:36:52.440 --> 00:36:57.639
<v Speaker 3>modify that that habit or limitation or mistake is just

689
00:36:57.679 --> 00:37:00.360
<v Speaker 3>to hang out with cool people. Go find cool people

690
00:37:00.400 --> 00:37:05.199
<v Speaker 3>who look not who fake happy but are putting out

691
00:37:05.239 --> 00:37:08.440
<v Speaker 3>good into the world. I don't take much interest in

692
00:37:08.519 --> 00:37:10.920
<v Speaker 3>people who are happy in their own tiny little lives.

693
00:37:11.199 --> 00:37:14.039
<v Speaker 3>I take interest in people who are happy by being

694
00:37:14.800 --> 00:37:18.280
<v Speaker 3>a big part of other people's lives, like yourself, as

695
00:37:18.280 --> 00:37:21.039
<v Speaker 3>you've just described, and over the last twenty four hours

696
00:37:21.079 --> 00:37:23.079
<v Speaker 3>of me learning more about you, that's what I see.

697
00:37:23.800 --> 00:37:25.559
<v Speaker 3>One of the more recent videos that you put up,

698
00:37:25.559 --> 00:37:27.639
<v Speaker 3>I believe there was a bunch of line land mines

699
00:37:27.639 --> 00:37:30.199
<v Speaker 3>in the back of your vehicle as you were moving around,

700
00:37:30.239 --> 00:37:32.559
<v Speaker 3>and I just thought, like, you know, who drives around

701
00:37:32.599 --> 00:37:35.320
<v Speaker 3>with a pile of land mines, whether they're inert or not.

702
00:37:35.440 --> 00:37:38.039
<v Speaker 3>Who does that. That's a guy who's in the game

703
00:37:38.199 --> 00:37:41.280
<v Speaker 3>of working for the team. He ain't in the hobby

704
00:37:41.280 --> 00:37:45.519
<v Speaker 3>of transporting land minds. He's in the hobby of doing

705
00:37:45.559 --> 00:37:48.880
<v Speaker 3>better for the world. And that is the distinction between

706
00:37:48.960 --> 00:37:52.079
<v Speaker 3>the victim mentality. You're either in it for yourself or

707
00:37:52.079 --> 00:37:55.039
<v Speaker 3>you're in it for the team.

708
00:37:55.119 --> 00:37:55.480
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

709
00:37:55.599 --> 00:37:59.159
<v Speaker 5>No, that was a crazy day, and I'm really glad

710
00:37:59.199 --> 00:38:01.239
<v Speaker 5>we found them all on that route because.

711
00:38:02.519 --> 00:38:03.239
<v Speaker 4>We drove it.

712
00:38:03.440 --> 00:38:08.639
<v Speaker 2>So by the way, folks, again, it's Landmine Removal dot Org.

713
00:38:08.760 --> 00:38:11.079
<v Speaker 2>Landmine Removal dot Org. The name of the book is

714
00:38:11.159 --> 00:38:13.480
<v Speaker 2>Tip of the Spear, the incredible story of an injured

715
00:38:13.480 --> 00:38:17.280
<v Speaker 2>Green Beret return to battle. I get the funny feeling, folks.

716
00:38:17.400 --> 00:38:19.440
<v Speaker 2>We probably have another book in the making here sooner

717
00:38:19.559 --> 00:38:21.840
<v Speaker 2>or later in the upcoming years. Right, Ryan, you get

718
00:38:21.840 --> 00:38:22.480
<v Speaker 2>the funny feeling.

719
00:38:23.440 --> 00:38:26.960
<v Speaker 4>I don't know. It's the first book was hard enough, so.

720
00:38:28.440 --> 00:38:29.960
<v Speaker 2>You know. I have a couple of questions for you.

721
00:38:30.079 --> 00:38:32.159
<v Speaker 2>You got a great conversation. It made me think between

722
00:38:32.199 --> 00:38:35.679
<v Speaker 2>you and Sean, I guess the first one is this

723
00:38:35.800 --> 00:38:37.920
<v Speaker 2>time of the question. It's a statement you mentioned earlier.

724
00:38:38.199 --> 00:38:39.519
<v Speaker 2>Both of you have mentioned you have to take care

725
00:38:39.519 --> 00:38:41.239
<v Speaker 2>of yourself if we can help others. This is actually

726
00:38:41.280 --> 00:38:43.159
<v Speaker 2>something we always tell a therapists before you work with

727
00:38:43.159 --> 00:38:45.639
<v Speaker 2>somebody with trauma, and you have to be able to

728
00:38:45.639 --> 00:38:49.400
<v Speaker 2>deal with it. Somebody having resolved their own trauma and

729
00:38:49.440 --> 00:38:51.159
<v Speaker 2>then they go and work with somebody but they can't

730
00:38:51.199 --> 00:38:54.159
<v Speaker 2>deal with it. So if they've been abused or something

731
00:38:54.159 --> 00:38:55.920
<v Speaker 2>of that sort and they work with somebody else who

732
00:38:55.960 --> 00:38:59.320
<v Speaker 2>has doesn't work well. It overwhelms the therapists and then

733
00:38:59.519 --> 00:39:02.280
<v Speaker 2>nobody's benefiting out of that. So that was interesting to

734
00:39:02.320 --> 00:39:04.639
<v Speaker 2>see that comparison. But I guess the other question I

735
00:39:04.679 --> 00:39:06.280
<v Speaker 2>have for you, I have two questions. I'm trying to

736
00:39:06.280 --> 00:39:08.519
<v Speaker 2>figure out how to organize this, but let me start

737
00:39:08.559 --> 00:39:13.679
<v Speaker 2>off with this one. That discovery that you had what

738
00:39:13.760 --> 00:39:18.440
<v Speaker 2>you needed to do. Nobody owes you anything, did you

739
00:39:18.480 --> 00:39:21.320
<v Speaker 2>have it as a Green Beret? Did they instill it

740
00:39:21.360 --> 00:39:23.320
<v Speaker 2>in you as a Green Beret? And did you lose

741
00:39:23.360 --> 00:39:25.840
<v Speaker 2>it temporarily and then it came back. I'm trying to

742
00:39:25.840 --> 00:39:29.519
<v Speaker 2>figure out the origin of that now.

743
00:39:29.639 --> 00:39:32.719
<v Speaker 5>The origin the origin of that came in the hospital

744
00:39:32.719 --> 00:39:37.079
<v Speaker 5>after I got blown up, and and it was it was,

745
00:39:37.280 --> 00:39:39.440
<v Speaker 5>you know, I was going through a really dark time

746
00:39:39.480 --> 00:39:42.480
<v Speaker 5>and it was my dad that actually had talked to

747
00:39:42.519 --> 00:39:47.239
<v Speaker 5>me about it, and it basically he said, hey, you know,

748
00:39:47.599 --> 00:39:49.960
<v Speaker 5>we got to have a talk because you're you're going

749
00:39:50.000 --> 00:39:53.159
<v Speaker 5>to a really dark place right now. And he said,

750
00:39:54.039 --> 00:39:57.119
<v Speaker 5>you know, the injury that happened to you, let's face it. Yeah,

751
00:39:57.159 --> 00:39:59.280
<v Speaker 5>I mean it was bad, but it's not the worst

752
00:39:59.280 --> 00:40:01.880
<v Speaker 5>injury that that's ever happened, and it won't be the

753
00:40:01.960 --> 00:40:06.719
<v Speaker 5>last one. Plenty of guys have gotten hurt, and there

754
00:40:06.880 --> 00:40:09.400
<v Speaker 5>nothing makes you special about it, he said. But you

755
00:40:09.480 --> 00:40:12.079
<v Speaker 5>have two choices right now, he said. You can you

756
00:40:12.159 --> 00:40:15.480
<v Speaker 5>can become a victim of this injury. You can let

757
00:40:15.480 --> 00:40:18.840
<v Speaker 5>this injury run your life. You can be you. You

758
00:40:18.960 --> 00:40:24.679
<v Speaker 5>will always be stuck September twelfth, twenty ten. You'll never

759
00:40:24.760 --> 00:40:27.199
<v Speaker 5>move on from that day, and you'll push people away,

760
00:40:27.639 --> 00:40:31.800
<v Speaker 5>and you'll and you'll go into you know, the depression

761
00:40:31.840 --> 00:40:35.880
<v Speaker 5>in these dark places because you'll be entitled and victimized

762
00:40:35.920 --> 00:40:38.280
<v Speaker 5>by your injury. Because you want to force people to

763
00:40:38.320 --> 00:40:41.199
<v Speaker 5>know what you've been through and what you sacrifice for them,

764
00:40:41.239 --> 00:40:44.079
<v Speaker 5>and they can't. They can't even you know, someone can

765
00:40:44.400 --> 00:40:46.880
<v Speaker 5>tell you, you know, thank you so much for everything you've

766
00:40:46.920 --> 00:40:49.000
<v Speaker 5>sacrificed for me until they're blue in the face. But

767
00:40:49.159 --> 00:40:53.360
<v Speaker 5>you can never feel entitlement. It's impossible. And he said,

768
00:40:53.840 --> 00:40:57.320
<v Speaker 5>So as you continue down that road, you're going to

769
00:40:57.360 --> 00:41:02.199
<v Speaker 5>continue pushing people away, and and you're gonna segreate. You know,

770
00:41:02.239 --> 00:41:05.280
<v Speaker 5>you're going to segregate yourself and next thing you know,

771
00:41:05.960 --> 00:41:08.519
<v Speaker 5>there's going to come a time when you're all alone.

772
00:41:08.880 --> 00:41:11.320
<v Speaker 5>You're at a very very dark place in your in

773
00:41:11.719 --> 00:41:14.119
<v Speaker 5>your mind and in your life, and you're probably going

774
00:41:14.199 --> 00:41:17.559
<v Speaker 5>to end it, because that's what happens when people go

775
00:41:17.679 --> 00:41:20.320
<v Speaker 5>down the route you are, and it starts off with

776
00:41:20.360 --> 00:41:24.000
<v Speaker 5>what you're doing right now. You're being an entitled victim.

777
00:41:24.039 --> 00:41:26.760
<v Speaker 5>Nobody owes you anything, all right, So you got you

778
00:41:26.800 --> 00:41:30.159
<v Speaker 5>got blown up in Afghanistan. Congratulations. A lot of people

779
00:41:30.239 --> 00:41:32.239
<v Speaker 5>get hurt all the time. Why do you know, Why

780
00:41:32.280 --> 00:41:35.480
<v Speaker 5>do you think you're owed something? You think you're the

781
00:41:35.519 --> 00:41:38.440
<v Speaker 5>only person that's ever gotten hurt. It's like, that's that's

782
00:41:38.440 --> 00:41:42.280
<v Speaker 5>pretty selfish, and you need to get over yourself. He said,

783
00:41:42.360 --> 00:41:46.000
<v Speaker 5>what I recommend is you have another path. The road

784
00:41:46.119 --> 00:41:48.800
<v Speaker 5>is forked right now. And he said, the other path

785
00:41:48.880 --> 00:41:51.719
<v Speaker 5>you can take is you can use this injury to

786
00:41:51.800 --> 00:41:55.280
<v Speaker 5>make yourself stronger. You can use this injury to you know,

787
00:41:55.559 --> 00:41:58.440
<v Speaker 5>renew your relationship with God. You can use this injury,

788
00:41:58.960 --> 00:42:01.000
<v Speaker 5>you know all those things when you were you were

789
00:42:01.079 --> 00:42:02.960
<v Speaker 5>laying on the ground there by the helme and river,

790
00:42:03.360 --> 00:42:05.480
<v Speaker 5>thinking you were going to die and wishing you didn't

791
00:42:05.519 --> 00:42:07.440
<v Speaker 5>do this, this or this. He's like, you got the

792
00:42:07.880 --> 00:42:10.920
<v Speaker 5>You got the the reset button. Most men in life

793
00:42:10.960 --> 00:42:15.039
<v Speaker 5>will never get to reset and go back and and

794
00:42:15.039 --> 00:42:16.159
<v Speaker 5>and change their ways.

795
00:42:16.280 --> 00:42:16.880
<v Speaker 4>You got it.

796
00:42:17.119 --> 00:42:19.280
<v Speaker 5>You were you should be dead you're not. You got

797
00:42:19.320 --> 00:42:22.920
<v Speaker 5>the reset button. All those things, those regrets that you had,

798
00:42:23.199 --> 00:42:25.920
<v Speaker 5>you can change all that. You can make yourself stronger.

799
00:42:26.320 --> 00:42:28.400
<v Speaker 5>And he said, but don't do it for you. Make

800
00:42:28.440 --> 00:42:32.639
<v Speaker 5>yourself stronger to help other people. You have that you're

801
00:42:32.840 --> 00:42:34.679
<v Speaker 5>you're at that fork in the road. I know we

802
00:42:34.679 --> 00:42:38.079
<v Speaker 5>were going to get here. You're there, but it's up

803
00:42:38.119 --> 00:42:41.159
<v Speaker 5>to you which direction you want to go. I highly

804
00:42:41.199 --> 00:42:44.960
<v Speaker 5>warn you against taking the entitled victimized route because you're

805
00:42:45.000 --> 00:42:46.639
<v Speaker 5>not going to make it through it. You're not strong

806
00:42:46.760 --> 00:42:50.360
<v Speaker 5>enough mentally to live to be an old man. So

807
00:42:50.920 --> 00:42:55.559
<v Speaker 5>that conversation there just you know, and again it's it's

808
00:42:55.559 --> 00:42:57.840
<v Speaker 5>not like my entire life change, And I mean, it's life.

809
00:42:57.920 --> 00:43:02.280
<v Speaker 5>You're you're constantly battling. But that's what kind of got

810
00:43:02.320 --> 00:43:06.079
<v Speaker 5>me started on the path of you know, taking my

811
00:43:06.159 --> 00:43:10.519
<v Speaker 5>life back and understanding that you know, you're not out anything,

812
00:43:11.039 --> 00:43:12.880
<v Speaker 5>and yeah, I can.

813
00:43:13.039 --> 00:43:14.280
<v Speaker 4>Okay, So you got hurt.

814
00:43:14.360 --> 00:43:17.599
<v Speaker 5>That's life, man, Lots lots of people get hurt and

815
00:43:17.639 --> 00:43:20.239
<v Speaker 5>banged up in life. Lots of people go through some

816
00:43:20.280 --> 00:43:25.519
<v Speaker 5>really really bad times. It's life. Get over yourself. You're

817
00:43:25.559 --> 00:43:28.280
<v Speaker 5>not any more important than anybody else out there, So

818
00:43:28.440 --> 00:43:31.320
<v Speaker 5>quit thinking you are. Quit thinking people owe you something

819
00:43:32.719 --> 00:43:34.119
<v Speaker 5>and so that that was.

820
00:43:34.119 --> 00:43:35.599
<v Speaker 4>What kind of you know.

821
00:43:36.480 --> 00:43:41.360
<v Speaker 5>I didn't realize that I had an entitled, victimize you know,

822
00:43:41.559 --> 00:43:44.559
<v Speaker 5>type of mindset until I went through that really dark

823
00:43:44.599 --> 00:43:45.880
<v Speaker 5>time after getting injured.

824
00:43:46.239 --> 00:43:46.920
<v Speaker 4>That's when I.

825
00:43:46.920 --> 00:43:51.400
<v Speaker 5>Realized like, oh, I've got some I've got some major

826
00:43:51.400 --> 00:43:53.639
<v Speaker 5>holes in my life. I need to I need to

827
00:43:53.679 --> 00:43:57.079
<v Speaker 5>patch up here. And it took an injury for me

828
00:43:57.679 --> 00:44:00.639
<v Speaker 5>to actually see that. And a lot of people, you know,

829
00:44:00.719 --> 00:44:03.280
<v Speaker 5>they may not understand this when I say it, but

830
00:44:04.239 --> 00:44:07.960
<v Speaker 5>stepping on that ied probably saved my life because I

831
00:44:08.079 --> 00:44:11.119
<v Speaker 5>was forced to. I was forced to take care of

832
00:44:11.239 --> 00:44:14.199
<v Speaker 5>myself mentally when I never had the chance to do

833
00:44:14.239 --> 00:44:16.400
<v Speaker 5>it before because I was so busy with being a

834
00:44:16.440 --> 00:44:19.360
<v Speaker 5>Green Beret in life that I never really focused on

835
00:44:19.480 --> 00:44:23.280
<v Speaker 5>who I was. And again, it wasn't an overnight thing.

836
00:44:23.599 --> 00:44:27.199
<v Speaker 5>I mean, hell, it's thirteen years later and I'm sitting

837
00:44:27.280 --> 00:44:30.320
<v Speaker 5>back and I'm still learning lessons like oh wow, yeah

838
00:44:30.360 --> 00:44:32.639
<v Speaker 5>that makes sense now, got it? Or you know, I

839
00:44:32.679 --> 00:44:34.920
<v Speaker 5>need to adjust fire here or tighten up my shot

840
00:44:34.960 --> 00:44:39.440
<v Speaker 5>group there. But that's the amazing thing about life is

841
00:44:39.480 --> 00:44:42.239
<v Speaker 5>we're constantly learning. It's not borring if you don't let

842
00:44:42.239 --> 00:44:42.440
<v Speaker 5>it be.

843
00:44:44.559 --> 00:44:48.320
<v Speaker 3>I agree do you mind if I ask a question dot? Thanks?

844
00:44:49.280 --> 00:44:54.360
<v Speaker 3>So what your dad gave you as advice was freaking amazing.

845
00:44:55.039 --> 00:44:59.519
<v Speaker 3>Now can you put someone else in that position? Not

846
00:44:59.599 --> 00:45:02.719
<v Speaker 3>your dad? Was it only your dad that could have

847
00:45:02.840 --> 00:45:06.159
<v Speaker 3>said that for you to in that moment get some

848
00:45:06.280 --> 00:45:07.920
<v Speaker 3>traction on it. What if it would have been a

849
00:45:08.000 --> 00:45:11.199
<v Speaker 3>random guy down the street or or in a hospital,

850
00:45:11.199 --> 00:45:13.360
<v Speaker 3>if someone would have sauntered down and walked into the

851
00:45:13.400 --> 00:45:16.320
<v Speaker 3>wrong room and they didn't know you and they saw

852
00:45:16.400 --> 00:45:18.840
<v Speaker 3>that you were struggling a bit. What if someone else

853
00:45:18.880 --> 00:45:22.000
<v Speaker 3>would have delivered that message that you weren't too familiar with.

854
00:45:23.440 --> 00:45:25.159
<v Speaker 5>It wouldn't have been It wouldn't have been the same

855
00:45:25.199 --> 00:45:27.920
<v Speaker 5>as coming from my dad, because I know, you know,

856
00:45:28.000 --> 00:45:30.519
<v Speaker 5>I know my dad's passed, and I know that you

857
00:45:30.559 --> 00:45:35.119
<v Speaker 5>know he's been through some through some very very tough

858
00:45:35.159 --> 00:45:37.880
<v Speaker 5>times in his life and he and he never.

859
00:45:37.760 --> 00:45:41.480
<v Speaker 4>Took the victim role of it. So it is. It

860
00:45:41.559 --> 00:45:43.480
<v Speaker 4>is one of those conversations that you have to.

861
00:45:43.440 --> 00:45:45.199
<v Speaker 5>Be you have to be very careful with how you

862
00:45:45.239 --> 00:45:48.639
<v Speaker 5>deliver it because you you can definitely come off hostile.

863
00:45:49.119 --> 00:45:52.519
<v Speaker 5>But no, with all the medication I was on and

864
00:45:52.559 --> 00:45:56.800
<v Speaker 5>the narcotics I was on, no that that came at

865
00:45:56.840 --> 00:45:59.039
<v Speaker 5>a perfect timing from the only person that it probably

866
00:45:59.079 --> 00:45:59.920
<v Speaker 5>would have got through to me.

867
00:46:00.719 --> 00:46:07.320
<v Speaker 2>How sure that that's incredible stuff? Well that's a good segue,

868
00:46:07.320 --> 00:46:09.440
<v Speaker 2>I guess once again Landmine Removal dot Org. The name

869
00:46:09.440 --> 00:46:10.920
<v Speaker 2>of the book is Tip of the Spear, The Incredible

870
00:46:10.960 --> 00:46:14.760
<v Speaker 2>Story But injured Green Beret return to battle. I know

871
00:46:14.800 --> 00:46:17.000
<v Speaker 2>we're heading towards the tail end here. We got about

872
00:46:17.000 --> 00:46:18.880
<v Speaker 2>another ten or fifteen minutes. I think, are you good

873
00:46:18.880 --> 00:46:19.599
<v Speaker 2>on Seien's chill?

874
00:46:19.679 --> 00:46:22.440
<v Speaker 3>Sean, yeah, I've got about another fifteen minutes myself.

875
00:46:22.559 --> 00:46:27.000
<v Speaker 2>You two right, You're good? Okay. You mentioned empowerment. I

876
00:46:27.000 --> 00:46:30.000
<v Speaker 2>thought this was a very interesting because you said working

877
00:46:31.199 --> 00:46:34.119
<v Speaker 2>or living not for me, but living for we empower

878
00:46:34.119 --> 00:46:38.039
<v Speaker 2>as individuals. And how did that How would you describe

879
00:46:38.239 --> 00:46:41.239
<v Speaker 2>the empowering for you? What did you feel like when

880
00:46:41.239 --> 00:46:43.039
<v Speaker 2>you did you feel like you could do more things?

881
00:46:43.039 --> 00:46:45.920
<v Speaker 2>Did you feel more liberated? What did empowering feel for you?

882
00:46:47.440 --> 00:46:52.400
<v Speaker 5>So, when I realized that it wasn't about me, the

883
00:46:52.440 --> 00:46:55.840
<v Speaker 5>world and people have heard this a million times, but

884
00:46:55.920 --> 00:46:56.559
<v Speaker 5>it's different.

885
00:46:56.639 --> 00:46:58.760
<v Speaker 4>There's a difference between hearing and listening.

886
00:47:00.280 --> 00:47:06.119
<v Speaker 5>But when when I finally was able to to understand

887
00:47:07.239 --> 00:47:10.480
<v Speaker 5>the saying that we've all heard the world doesn't revolve

888
00:47:10.519 --> 00:47:14.719
<v Speaker 5>around you. When I finally understood that, and when I

889
00:47:14.800 --> 00:47:18.480
<v Speaker 5>finally understood the fact that you're only a part of this,

890
00:47:18.719 --> 00:47:22.000
<v Speaker 5>you are not the whole thing, and and it and

891
00:47:22.039 --> 00:47:26.119
<v Speaker 5>it is it rolls back to that entitlement. A lot

892
00:47:26.119 --> 00:47:30.280
<v Speaker 5>of entitled people think that the world revolves around them

893
00:47:30.400 --> 00:47:33.920
<v Speaker 5>or they're owed something because of filling all the blanks

894
00:47:33.920 --> 00:47:37.480
<v Speaker 5>that you want to when you're when you realize that

895
00:47:37.519 --> 00:47:40.360
<v Speaker 5>you're only a piece of the puzzle or you're a

896
00:47:40.480 --> 00:47:43.039
<v Speaker 5>part of something, and you are stronger when it's we,

897
00:47:43.320 --> 00:47:48.360
<v Speaker 5>then it's me. That's that's again, that's when life starts

898
00:47:48.400 --> 00:47:50.719
<v Speaker 5>to become just the just a little bit easier.

899
00:47:50.760 --> 00:47:52.840
<v Speaker 4>I mean, it's still hard, but.

900
00:47:54.719 --> 00:47:57.320
<v Speaker 5>When you can when you don't have to take that

901
00:47:57.360 --> 00:48:01.320
<v Speaker 5>burden on alone, when they're when when when you understand

902
00:48:01.400 --> 00:48:06.880
<v Speaker 5>we and that tribe mentality, yeah, life, life becomes a

903
00:48:06.960 --> 00:48:11.679
<v Speaker 5>lot simpler and we and that and and and that

904
00:48:11.679 --> 00:48:15.880
<v Speaker 5>that tribe mentality, that understanding with you understanding that you're

905
00:48:15.880 --> 00:48:19.920
<v Speaker 5>also helping other people too, because it is it's it's

906
00:48:20.000 --> 00:48:20.440
<v Speaker 5>it's a we.

907
00:48:20.679 --> 00:48:23.719
<v Speaker 4>It's a we over me. And I know and I

908
00:48:23.760 --> 00:48:26.599
<v Speaker 4>know in the teams we over me.

909
00:48:26.800 --> 00:48:30.920
<v Speaker 5>Is it. I mean, it's critical. Especially in combat. There's

910
00:48:30.920 --> 00:48:33.440
<v Speaker 5>not a lot. There's not a lot of me's running

911
00:48:33.440 --> 00:48:36.280
<v Speaker 5>around special operations. I mean there's there's some, but there's

912
00:48:36.280 --> 00:48:40.159
<v Speaker 5>not a lot because we's don't I mean, we's is

913
00:48:40.199 --> 00:48:43.280
<v Speaker 5>how you know, the WEI mentality is how you're going

914
00:48:43.360 --> 00:48:50.119
<v Speaker 5>to survive. There's I don't know, it's just yeah, we

915
00:48:50.360 --> 00:48:52.599
<v Speaker 5>over me is yeah, it's.

916
00:48:52.400 --> 00:48:56.480
<v Speaker 4>It's simple to say, but it definitely is. It's it's it's.

917
00:48:57.760 --> 00:49:01.480
<v Speaker 5>And there's also there's also a there's also a vulnerability

918
00:49:01.480 --> 00:49:04.599
<v Speaker 5>that you have to accept. A lot of people they

919
00:49:04.639 --> 00:49:08.559
<v Speaker 5>think that being vulnerable is a negative thing, Being vulnerable

920
00:49:08.639 --> 00:49:12.840
<v Speaker 5>is dangerous. But there's strength through vulnerability, and you can't

921
00:49:12.920 --> 00:49:18.400
<v Speaker 5>take chances and you can't take risks healthy healthy risks.

922
00:49:18.440 --> 00:49:21.599
<v Speaker 5>I'm not I'm not saying, you know, go running through

923
00:49:21.599 --> 00:49:25.239
<v Speaker 5>a through an anti personnel minefield to see what happens,

924
00:49:25.320 --> 00:49:28.159
<v Speaker 5>but you know you're you're not going to test the

925
00:49:28.159 --> 00:49:30.280
<v Speaker 5>limits of your life and really be able to help

926
00:49:30.360 --> 00:49:36.480
<v Speaker 5>other people if you don't understand strength through vulnerability. So

927
00:49:37.440 --> 00:49:40.679
<v Speaker 5>and and it is, and part of part of that

928
00:49:40.880 --> 00:49:46.039
<v Speaker 5>is also opening yourself up. Another part of we over

929
00:49:46.119 --> 00:49:49.679
<v Speaker 5>Me is is you have to be emotionally available for

930
00:49:49.679 --> 00:49:53.039
<v Speaker 5>for people, No one's gonna know there's there's not a

931
00:49:53.039 --> 00:49:55.920
<v Speaker 5>lot of people that are going to trust somebody that

932
00:49:56.079 --> 00:49:58.159
<v Speaker 5>is just telling you something straight out of a book,

933
00:49:58.280 --> 00:50:01.119
<v Speaker 5>whether it's mental health or self help or anything like that,

934
00:50:01.159 --> 00:50:03.000
<v Speaker 5>and they're reading it to you and you go.

935
00:50:03.039 --> 00:50:06.199
<v Speaker 4>Home and you're like, wow, that was horrible.

936
00:50:07.280 --> 00:50:10.599
<v Speaker 5>There is there is, there's there's an emotional there's an

937
00:50:10.599 --> 00:50:14.679
<v Speaker 5>emotional aspect to it, and emotions are vulnerable, are vulnerabilities.

938
00:50:15.400 --> 00:50:19.119
<v Speaker 5>So that's another thing that you know, I mean, I

939
00:50:19.119 --> 00:50:21.400
<v Speaker 5>struggle with it a lot because you know, not a

940
00:50:21.400 --> 00:50:24.000
<v Speaker 5>lot of team guys like to like to be vulnerable,

941
00:50:24.039 --> 00:50:27.920
<v Speaker 5>but their strength through vulnerability, and and you.

942
00:50:27.880 --> 00:50:30.079
<v Speaker 4>Know, that's another thing that I talked to guys about.

943
00:50:30.159 --> 00:50:33.920
<v Speaker 5>But part of being we is there is some vulnerability

944
00:50:33.960 --> 00:50:37.920
<v Speaker 5>to it, and you're taking a risk, but it's it's

945
00:50:38.000 --> 00:50:40.079
<v Speaker 5>worth it, and it's and it's and it's really the

946
00:50:40.079 --> 00:50:43.960
<v Speaker 5>only way you're going to be able to go at this,

947
00:50:44.079 --> 00:50:47.639
<v Speaker 5>whether it's mental health or just life in drum in general,

948
00:50:47.679 --> 00:50:50.360
<v Speaker 5>because not one person can burn in the entire load.

949
00:50:50.519 --> 00:50:53.800
<v Speaker 4>It's it's impossible, agreed.

950
00:50:53.840 --> 00:50:56.519
<v Speaker 3>And And on the on that vulnerability point, I think

951
00:50:56.559 --> 00:51:01.079
<v Speaker 3>it's critical that everyone understands that if you are being vulnerable,

952
00:51:01.280 --> 00:51:05.480
<v Speaker 3>you're being courageous, and as you're being courageous, you're building

953
00:51:05.519 --> 00:51:10.039
<v Speaker 3>your resilience. And it's a funny little loop that builds

954
00:51:10.079 --> 00:51:12.719
<v Speaker 3>on itself. The more you can be vulnerable, the more

955
00:51:12.760 --> 00:51:15.360
<v Speaker 3>courageous you are. Is the more vulnerable you can be,

956
00:51:15.400 --> 00:51:18.000
<v Speaker 3>the more courageous you are. And it's a self fulfilling

957
00:51:18.039 --> 00:51:22.000
<v Speaker 3>prophecy almost that you are going to become resilient. You

958
00:51:22.039 --> 00:51:24.239
<v Speaker 3>are going to become a better person if you just

959
00:51:24.320 --> 00:51:26.880
<v Speaker 3>stay in the loop of adding a little bit of

960
00:51:27.000 --> 00:51:32.239
<v Speaker 3>vulnerability out there into the world. That vulnerability. Myself, I'm trying,

961
00:51:32.599 --> 00:51:35.639
<v Speaker 3>like yourself, I struggle with it. I'm trying to be

962
00:51:35.719 --> 00:51:40.440
<v Speaker 3>really open and transparent and vulnerable to the internet and

963
00:51:40.440 --> 00:51:42.840
<v Speaker 3>in the roles that I have lived in through my

964
00:51:43.079 --> 00:51:47.199
<v Speaker 3>various careers, and it's tough, man Like. The ego is

965
00:51:47.239 --> 00:51:52.840
<v Speaker 3>a wicked thing that will fight against the ability to

966
00:51:52.880 --> 00:51:55.719
<v Speaker 3>be vulnerable, but it does take a lot of courage,

967
00:51:55.760 --> 00:51:58.440
<v Speaker 3>and I think that that's a really really powerful tool

968
00:51:59.079 --> 00:51:59.480
<v Speaker 3>for sure.

969
00:52:00.559 --> 00:52:04.559
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, ego is all me that revolve around me.

970
00:52:06.039 --> 00:52:08.119
<v Speaker 3>And one of the great things about that what you

971
00:52:08.159 --> 00:52:13.400
<v Speaker 3>said in respect to being vulnerable within a we team

972
00:52:13.800 --> 00:52:16.760
<v Speaker 3>is the moment that you start or not specifically for

973
00:52:17.000 --> 00:52:19.719
<v Speaker 3>speaking to yourself, I'm speaking to anyone out there who's listening.

974
00:52:19.719 --> 00:52:24.159
<v Speaker 3>The moment that you're more vulnerable is an opportunity for

975
00:52:24.239 --> 00:52:27.039
<v Speaker 3>those around you to see that it's okay to be vulnerable,

976
00:52:27.320 --> 00:52:30.920
<v Speaker 3>and then the we team starts recognizing that, well, we

977
00:52:31.039 --> 00:52:33.760
<v Speaker 3>can all be just a little bit more vulnerable. It's

978
00:52:33.800 --> 00:52:37.000
<v Speaker 3>okay to do it as a we. And I find

979
00:52:37.039 --> 00:52:43.360
<v Speaker 3>that building a team of vulnerable individuals who are respected

980
00:52:43.800 --> 00:52:46.920
<v Speaker 3>either leaders in their community or are respected amongst their

981
00:52:46.920 --> 00:52:50.559
<v Speaker 3>peers to some degree, simply builds the team up and

982
00:52:50.639 --> 00:52:53.880
<v Speaker 3>to be more transparent and caring for each other.

983
00:52:55.159 --> 00:52:59.400
<v Speaker 4>Yep. But yeah, for people listening, vulnerability doesn't mean weak.

984
00:53:00.079 --> 00:53:00.960
<v Speaker 4>It doesn't mean weak.

985
00:53:01.280 --> 00:53:01.599
<v Speaker 3>Agreed.

986
00:53:02.920 --> 00:53:04.000
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, the the.

987
00:53:05.480 --> 00:53:10.400
<v Speaker 5>The strongest people in the world that I know are

988
00:53:10.440 --> 00:53:14.599
<v Speaker 5>the ones that are capable of inflicting mass violence if

989
00:53:14.639 --> 00:53:16.159
<v Speaker 5>they needed to, but they don't.

990
00:53:16.639 --> 00:53:17.960
<v Speaker 4>They're the people that are.

991
00:53:18.119 --> 00:53:21.719
<v Speaker 5>They are emotionally there, and they have compassion, they have empathy,

992
00:53:21.719 --> 00:53:23.679
<v Speaker 5>and they have all that. But it doesn't mean you're weak.

993
00:53:24.159 --> 00:53:26.599
<v Speaker 5>Don't ever be weak, because being weak will make you

994
00:53:26.639 --> 00:53:29.880
<v Speaker 5>a victim. You have to you have to be able

995
00:53:30.239 --> 00:53:34.400
<v Speaker 5>to understand that vulnerability does not mean weakness.

996
00:53:34.840 --> 00:53:36.840
<v Speaker 3>I agree. Some of the language that has used, some

997
00:53:36.880 --> 00:53:40.079
<v Speaker 3>of the words out there that are used are are

998
00:53:40.320 --> 00:53:44.119
<v Speaker 3>It's when I first started using them myself, I struggled, Man,

999
00:53:44.199 --> 00:53:47.199
<v Speaker 3>I was feeling a bit weak by talking about being

1000
00:53:47.280 --> 00:53:50.159
<v Speaker 3>weak and it's not weak at all. But initially, in

1001
00:53:50.239 --> 00:53:54.719
<v Speaker 3>the early phases, these words are being vulnerable, like I

1002
00:53:55.519 --> 00:53:58.480
<v Speaker 3>wanted to turn turn a one eighty and run away.

1003
00:53:58.840 --> 00:54:00.800
<v Speaker 3>The first time someone said, dude, you just got to

1004
00:54:00.840 --> 00:54:04.960
<v Speaker 3>be vulnerable, it was just it was these were words

1005
00:54:04.960 --> 00:54:06.760
<v Speaker 3>that I wasn't used to. But you have to have

1006
00:54:06.800 --> 00:54:11.679
<v Speaker 3>the courage to embrace the the adversity of the moment,

1007
00:54:11.840 --> 00:54:16.400
<v Speaker 3>the psychological disconnect from really what we should be doing

1008
00:54:16.400 --> 00:54:19.199
<v Speaker 3>in life, and that's being courageously vulnerable for sure.

1009
00:54:20.400 --> 00:54:20.639
<v Speaker 2>Yep.

1010
00:54:21.360 --> 00:54:25.920
<v Speaker 4>Interesting, No, that's no. Absolutely.

1011
00:54:26.760 --> 00:54:28.760
<v Speaker 2>I was just gonna say it's interesting because it's reminded me.

1012
00:54:29.280 --> 00:54:30.639
<v Speaker 2>I don't know how I got over here, but I

1013
00:54:30.679 --> 00:54:33.639
<v Speaker 2>got over here. The ethos of an old TV show

1014
00:54:33.639 --> 00:54:35.159
<v Speaker 2>called Kung Fu. You guys remember that one?

1015
00:54:35.199 --> 00:54:36.679
<v Speaker 3>Oh yeah, David Garden, No.

1016
00:54:37.079 --> 00:54:39.599
<v Speaker 2>Remember that? Yeah? One of the few shows at Why

1017
00:54:39.679 --> 00:54:43.440
<v Speaker 2>Chang Kane, Why Chank, that's right, One of the few

1018
00:54:43.480 --> 00:54:46.639
<v Speaker 2>shows that showed martial arts in the way that I've

1019
00:54:46.639 --> 00:54:50.920
<v Speaker 2>always embodied it or envisioned it, which was just like

1020
00:54:51.000 --> 00:54:53.840
<v Speaker 2>Ryan said, I know I can hurt you, but he

1021
00:54:53.880 --> 00:54:55.760
<v Speaker 2>didn't want to. He didn't want to engage in any

1022
00:54:55.840 --> 00:54:58.280
<v Speaker 2>of the fights. Unless there was some kind of severe justice,

1023
00:54:58.280 --> 00:54:59.920
<v Speaker 2>he was going to jump in, but most of the

1024
00:55:00.000 --> 00:55:01.760
<v Speaker 2>time he didn't want to get involved. In Every black

1025
00:55:01.800 --> 00:55:06.599
<v Speaker 2>belt that I've ever talked to, soft guys included, they

1026
00:55:06.599 --> 00:55:08.320
<v Speaker 2>don't get into things they don't need to get into.

1027
00:55:09.239 --> 00:55:11.559
<v Speaker 2>They don't worry about the ego. I know I can

1028
00:55:11.599 --> 00:55:14.320
<v Speaker 2>destroy you right now in probably half a second, but

1029
00:55:14.360 --> 00:55:17.559
<v Speaker 2>there's no point. There's a point in doing this. Maybe

1030
00:55:17.559 --> 00:55:20.480
<v Speaker 2>this person's drunk, maybe this person's that I'm not going

1031
00:55:20.519 --> 00:55:24.320
<v Speaker 2>to engage, And to me, I see, you're putting yourself

1032
00:55:24.360 --> 00:55:27.440
<v Speaker 2>on the line vulnerably right because everybody's gonna look at

1033
00:55:27.480 --> 00:55:29.199
<v Speaker 2>you or you're a whimp or this and that. But

1034
00:55:29.280 --> 00:55:31.760
<v Speaker 2>in your heart, you know you're strong enough. I can

1035
00:55:31.800 --> 00:55:34.000
<v Speaker 2>take care of this guy and everybody else around me

1036
00:55:34.039 --> 00:55:36.519
<v Speaker 2>if I had to, but I don't because that's the

1037
00:55:36.559 --> 00:55:39.119
<v Speaker 2>stronger guy in me. I don't know it reminded me

1038
00:55:39.159 --> 00:55:40.719
<v Speaker 2>of that. I don't know if that resonates it all.

1039
00:55:41.000 --> 00:55:42.519
<v Speaker 2>Maybe I'm too far off with me.

1040
00:55:43.719 --> 00:55:47.920
<v Speaker 5>No, No, it absolutely does. I mean being able. You're

1041
00:55:48.039 --> 00:55:53.519
<v Speaker 5>being able to immediately inflict violence of action on somebody

1042
00:55:53.599 --> 00:55:56.639
<v Speaker 5>if you need to protect your family, or your way

1043
00:55:56.679 --> 00:56:01.800
<v Speaker 5>of life, life, limbit, eyesight, or somebody else. You know

1044
00:56:02.039 --> 00:56:05.719
<v Speaker 5>that that can't do that for themselves. That is absolutely

1045
00:56:06.079 --> 00:56:10.519
<v Speaker 5>critical to not becoming a victim. But being vulnerable doesn't

1046
00:56:10.599 --> 00:56:15.159
<v Speaker 5>mean that you're weak and walking around and kicking everybody's

1047
00:56:15.199 --> 00:56:16.440
<v Speaker 5>ass because you think you can.

1048
00:56:16.880 --> 00:56:19.239
<v Speaker 4>That's that's weakness. That's weakness.

1049
00:56:19.280 --> 00:56:22.239
<v Speaker 5>You have something going on that you're trying to make

1050
00:56:22.320 --> 00:56:26.679
<v Speaker 5>up for. But no, that's that's what I tell guys.

1051
00:56:26.719 --> 00:56:29.280
<v Speaker 5>You know, strength through vulnerability doesn't mean that you know

1052
00:56:29.320 --> 00:56:31.199
<v Speaker 5>you're gonna let somebody walk all over you.

1053
00:56:31.239 --> 00:56:32.840
<v Speaker 4>That's that that's not the case at all.

1054
00:56:34.199 --> 00:56:36.320
<v Speaker 5>But it also doesn't mean you know, if a guy

1055
00:56:36.400 --> 00:56:39.519
<v Speaker 5>walked in to the bar and wanted to pick a

1056
00:56:39.519 --> 00:56:41.119
<v Speaker 5>fight with me and I can walk out, I was like,

1057
00:56:41.119 --> 00:56:43.519
<v Speaker 5>all right, man, yeah, you're you're you're a badass. I'm

1058
00:56:43.559 --> 00:56:46.000
<v Speaker 5>out of here. I don't care is that I don't

1059
00:56:46.039 --> 00:56:48.039
<v Speaker 5>have anything to prove to you, and I'm not gonna

1060
00:56:48.719 --> 00:56:51.239
<v Speaker 5>I'm not going to involve myself in that the you know,

1061
00:56:52.239 --> 00:56:54.880
<v Speaker 5>maybe I'm maybe it's the forty four you know that

1062
00:56:55.000 --> 00:56:57.679
<v Speaker 5>I am or whatnot, But the the ego that I

1063
00:56:57.719 --> 00:57:00.960
<v Speaker 5>had as a kid, which was which surrounded me, not

1064
00:57:01.119 --> 00:57:04.880
<v Speaker 5>we it just it doesn't It doesn't serve anything. But

1065
00:57:05.320 --> 00:57:08.159
<v Speaker 5>you corner me or you put your hands on my family,

1066
00:57:08.280 --> 00:57:10.760
<v Speaker 5>well then you're going to see that. You're going to

1067
00:57:10.800 --> 00:57:13.519
<v Speaker 5>see exactly what I'm talking about. That being vulnerable doesn't

1068
00:57:13.559 --> 00:57:16.159
<v Speaker 5>mean you're weak. And so that's the one thing that

1069
00:57:16.199 --> 00:57:20.960
<v Speaker 5>I tell guys, Vulnerability doesn't mean weakness. It just there's

1070
00:57:21.000 --> 00:57:23.679
<v Speaker 5>strengths of vulnerability and you have to understand that. And

1071
00:57:23.679 --> 00:57:30.920
<v Speaker 5>and that word vulnerable is it's it's it's a nasty word.

1072
00:57:30.960 --> 00:57:34.400
<v Speaker 5>And a lot of you know, either special operations or whatnot.

1073
00:57:34.400 --> 00:57:36.760
<v Speaker 5>It's the same thing as fail. You know, fail like,

1074
00:57:36.880 --> 00:57:41.400
<v Speaker 5>oh man, you're you're ruined. Why what happens if you

1075
00:57:41.480 --> 00:57:43.800
<v Speaker 5>learn from that failure? What happens if you take to

1076
00:57:43.920 --> 00:57:47.039
<v Speaker 5>you if you take the lessons from from you know,

1077
00:57:47.199 --> 00:57:51.199
<v Speaker 5>that failure, and you make yourself stronger than it was. Failure?

1078
00:57:51.239 --> 00:57:52.480
<v Speaker 4>Actually that bad.

1079
00:57:52.800 --> 00:57:55.400
<v Speaker 5>A lot of people, a lot of people that are great,

1080
00:57:55.679 --> 00:57:59.880
<v Speaker 5>great leaders in life have failed more than they succeeded,

1081
00:58:00.039 --> 00:58:04.480
<v Speaker 5>but they learn from them. But vulnerability and failing they're

1082
00:58:04.559 --> 00:58:05.639
<v Speaker 5>just taboo words.

1083
00:58:06.440 --> 00:58:11.599
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and I actively pursue failure most days. And I

1084
00:58:11.639 --> 00:58:14.760
<v Speaker 3>have a little motto in my head, I like to

1085
00:58:14.840 --> 00:58:18.880
<v Speaker 3>kick ass. I'm sixty years older this year, and I

1086
00:58:18.920 --> 00:58:20.960
<v Speaker 3>still like to kick ass. But the ass that I'm

1087
00:58:21.039 --> 00:58:24.760
<v Speaker 3>kicking is my own. I'm kicking my own ass in life,

1088
00:58:24.760 --> 00:58:28.400
<v Speaker 3>and I've said it before to other folks, But there

1089
00:58:28.480 --> 00:58:31.039
<v Speaker 3>is also the part where I'm trying to kick my

1090
00:58:31.119 --> 00:58:33.199
<v Speaker 3>ass in life, sass, And that means all the people

1091
00:58:33.239 --> 00:58:35.880
<v Speaker 3>around me, Like I'm trying to pursue a pace that

1092
00:58:35.960 --> 00:58:39.719
<v Speaker 3>raises the boats all around me through kicking my own arson,

1093
00:58:39.840 --> 00:58:42.840
<v Speaker 3>demonstrating that that's just how I live my life. And

1094
00:58:43.119 --> 00:58:46.159
<v Speaker 3>someone wants to hop on board of kicking life sass

1095
00:58:46.159 --> 00:58:47.599
<v Speaker 3>as well, then I'm a big fan of that.

1096
00:58:48.519 --> 00:58:53.119
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, absolutely, Well, then we're down to the last

1097
00:58:53.119 --> 00:58:55.239
<v Speaker 2>for few minutes again, Folks, you can find more information

1098
00:58:55.280 --> 00:58:58.760
<v Speaker 2>on land Mine Removal dot org land Mine Removal dot org.

1099
00:59:00.079 --> 00:59:02.440
<v Speaker 2>Feel motivated, and I hope you do donat and help

1100
00:59:02.519 --> 00:59:04.760
<v Speaker 2>them out in any way possible. Tip of the Spear

1101
00:59:04.800 --> 00:59:06.400
<v Speaker 2>is the name of the book, The Incredible story of

1102
00:59:06.440 --> 00:59:10.559
<v Speaker 2>an injured green Berets return to battle. You know, we're

1103
00:59:10.559 --> 00:59:12.280
<v Speaker 2>down in the last few minutes, and I don't want

1104
00:59:12.280 --> 00:59:15.000
<v Speaker 2>to get to deep into engage any big questions. But

1105
00:59:15.440 --> 00:59:18.760
<v Speaker 2>you mentioned fail Did you have anybody who told you

1106
00:59:18.800 --> 00:59:20.840
<v Speaker 2>when you said I want to go back after the

1107
00:59:20.840 --> 00:59:23.880
<v Speaker 2>Ied incident and you went back again to return to battle.

1108
00:59:24.920 --> 00:59:27.840
<v Speaker 2>Did you hear people tell you Ryan, you ain't gonna

1109
00:59:27.880 --> 00:59:29.400
<v Speaker 2>do it, brother, just let it go.

1110
00:59:30.480 --> 00:59:31.719
<v Speaker 4>Oh yeah?

1111
00:59:31.920 --> 00:59:33.559
<v Speaker 2>And if you did, what did you say to yourself?

1112
00:59:35.159 --> 00:59:35.320
<v Speaker 4>Oh?

1113
00:59:35.400 --> 00:59:38.639
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, no, no, no, I I mean I had people

1114
00:59:38.639 --> 00:59:41.320
<v Speaker 5>telling me, hey, look, you're setting yourself up for failure

1115
00:59:42.320 --> 00:59:45.679
<v Speaker 5>management expectation. This is huge. You're you know, you're not

1116
00:59:45.920 --> 00:59:49.199
<v Speaker 5>You're not going back this injury. You're you're gonna be

1117
00:59:49.280 --> 00:59:51.199
<v Speaker 5>lucky to ever walk unassisted again.

1118
00:59:52.960 --> 00:59:53.320
<v Speaker 4>You know it.

1119
00:59:53.559 --> 00:59:57.480
<v Speaker 5>Just you need to control your mental health management expectation.

1120
00:59:57.960 --> 00:59:59.079
<v Speaker 4>Get this out of your head.

1121
00:59:59.119 --> 01:00:03.360
<v Speaker 5>This you know, you need to understand that it's done,

1122
01:00:03.559 --> 01:00:05.719
<v Speaker 5>even to the point to where I was medically retired

1123
01:00:06.000 --> 01:00:08.920
<v Speaker 5>and then I came back to active duty on a waiver.

1124
01:00:10.239 --> 01:00:13.920
<v Speaker 5>But yeah, it's I mean, there there there was definitely

1125
01:00:14.559 --> 01:00:16.599
<v Speaker 5>a lot of people that were trying to look out

1126
01:00:16.639 --> 01:00:19.679
<v Speaker 5>for my mental health, saying, hey, like you need to

1127
01:00:19.760 --> 01:00:23.679
<v Speaker 5>understand it's done, you need to refocus on something else,

1128
01:00:24.039 --> 01:00:27.480
<v Speaker 5>and you know. But then there was a few people

1129
01:00:27.880 --> 01:00:30.079
<v Speaker 5>that said, hey, why not give it.

1130
01:00:30.079 --> 01:00:33.480
<v Speaker 4>A shot, man, you never know, you know who knows.

1131
01:00:33.800 --> 01:00:37.400
<v Speaker 5>And and it was and it was that drive. It

1132
01:00:37.440 --> 01:00:41.679
<v Speaker 5>was just a couple people, my my physical therapist and

1133
01:00:41.679 --> 01:00:45.639
<v Speaker 5>my orthopedic surgeon. It's just a couple people that said, yeah,

1134
01:00:45.840 --> 01:00:47.400
<v Speaker 5>I mean, it's life, man, give it a shot.

1135
01:00:47.440 --> 01:00:50.039
<v Speaker 4>You never know. Maybe. And then I ended up going

1136
01:00:50.079 --> 01:00:51.639
<v Speaker 4>back to Afghanistan seven times.

1137
01:00:52.320 --> 01:00:57.400
<v Speaker 5>So so it's you know it and it's and it's

1138
01:00:57.440 --> 01:01:00.639
<v Speaker 5>not you know this, oh man, and you're you know,

1139
01:01:00.679 --> 01:01:03.639
<v Speaker 5>you did something that was absolutely unheard of. Blah blah

1140
01:01:03.639 --> 01:01:06.239
<v Speaker 5>blah blah blah, you're this superhuman or anything? Not at

1141
01:01:06.239 --> 01:01:10.719
<v Speaker 5>all that not even close What it is is I

1142
01:01:11.320 --> 01:01:12.480
<v Speaker 5>you know, the biggest thing.

1143
01:01:12.320 --> 01:01:15.519
<v Speaker 4>I stopped doing was feeling sorry for myself.

1144
01:01:16.280 --> 01:01:19.559
<v Speaker 5>And I started understanding, like, you know what, I'm going

1145
01:01:19.639 --> 01:01:23.000
<v Speaker 5>to give this everything I got. I'm going to dump

1146
01:01:23.159 --> 01:01:26.960
<v Speaker 5>everything I have into it, and if it works, great,

1147
01:01:27.000 --> 01:01:29.079
<v Speaker 5>If it doesn't work, at least I know I tried

1148
01:01:29.119 --> 01:01:31.239
<v Speaker 5>and I gave it everything I had. I didn't hold

1149
01:01:31.280 --> 01:01:35.239
<v Speaker 5>any reservations back. And if it doesn't work, then let

1150
01:01:35.239 --> 01:01:38.199
<v Speaker 5>me figure out what my path is. But right now,

1151
01:01:39.519 --> 01:01:42.440
<v Speaker 5>this is my path and people, you know, a lot

1152
01:01:42.440 --> 01:01:46.000
<v Speaker 5>of people say that my mindset on this is wrong.

1153
01:01:46.480 --> 01:01:49.039
<v Speaker 5>But they said, well, what was your backup plan or

1154
01:01:49.039 --> 01:01:51.519
<v Speaker 5>your alternative? And I said, I didn't have one, because

1155
01:01:51.519 --> 01:01:54.800
<v Speaker 5>when times get really, really tough, if you have a

1156
01:01:54.840 --> 01:01:58.599
<v Speaker 5>backup plan, when the pain into despair and everything gets

1157
01:01:58.599 --> 01:02:01.719
<v Speaker 5>to it gets it's overwhelming, you're going to take that

1158
01:02:01.760 --> 01:02:02.360
<v Speaker 5>backup plan.

1159
01:02:04.079 --> 01:02:05.800
<v Speaker 4>If you don't have a backup plan.

1160
01:02:05.880 --> 01:02:08.719
<v Speaker 5>Then you're going to continue moving forward until you just

1161
01:02:08.760 --> 01:02:12.880
<v Speaker 5>physically there's just no way in God's green earth that

1162
01:02:12.960 --> 01:02:14.880
<v Speaker 5>you're going to be able to continue on.

1163
01:02:14.960 --> 01:02:17.320
<v Speaker 4>It is not possible. Period.

1164
01:02:17.800 --> 01:02:20.119
<v Speaker 5>Well then, okay, you gave it everything you had. You

1165
01:02:20.159 --> 01:02:23.599
<v Speaker 5>had no backup plan, you had no alternative anything.

1166
01:02:23.880 --> 01:02:25.320
<v Speaker 4>This was it. It didn't work out.

1167
01:02:25.679 --> 01:02:29.159
<v Speaker 5>And in the end, like my dad told me, you know,

1168
01:02:29.199 --> 01:02:31.639
<v Speaker 5>when you're that old man sitting on your rocking chair

1169
01:02:32.119 --> 01:02:34.719
<v Speaker 5>looking back at your life on the things that you

1170
01:02:34.760 --> 01:02:37.760
<v Speaker 5>did or the worse, what you didn't do, you'll be

1171
01:02:37.760 --> 01:02:39.519
<v Speaker 5>able to look back on this and know that you

1172
01:02:39.559 --> 01:02:41.559
<v Speaker 5>gave it everything you had and it just wasn't in

1173
01:02:41.599 --> 01:02:44.599
<v Speaker 5>the cards, and that you'll sit back and you'll feel

1174
01:02:44.599 --> 01:02:48.400
<v Speaker 5>good about yourself. You did it, life worth are well lived,

1175
01:02:48.800 --> 01:02:50.079
<v Speaker 5>and he gave it everything you had.

1176
01:02:51.320 --> 01:02:54.800
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I love that. That's a man that's so powerful.

1177
01:02:54.840 --> 01:02:57.119
<v Speaker 3>You crystallize how I'm trying to live my life. You

1178
01:02:57.239 --> 01:02:59.599
<v Speaker 3>just said that so much better. I do have a

1179
01:02:59.679 --> 01:03:01.800
<v Speaker 3>quick question for I know we're running out of time, Doc,

1180
01:03:02.159 --> 01:03:07.239
<v Speaker 3>would you would you mind just quickly touching on your

1181
01:03:07.400 --> 01:03:10.280
<v Speaker 3>observations of the folks who were telling you, no, you

1182
01:03:10.320 --> 01:03:12.880
<v Speaker 3>can't do this, man, it's impossible and all of that

1183
01:03:13.000 --> 01:03:16.599
<v Speaker 3>good stuff, just trying to really discourage you from heading

1184
01:03:16.679 --> 01:03:20.079
<v Speaker 3>down the path that you chose to, like get after it.

1185
01:03:21.039 --> 01:03:22.880
<v Speaker 3>How did those people respond.

1186
01:03:23.800 --> 01:03:27.519
<v Speaker 5>So they they thought that they had my well being

1187
01:03:28.320 --> 01:03:31.360
<v Speaker 5>and my mental health in mind. Hey, you're setting yourself

1188
01:03:31.440 --> 01:03:34.760
<v Speaker 5>up for failure. You are putting all of your emotions

1189
01:03:34.800 --> 01:03:35.760
<v Speaker 5>into this and it's.

1190
01:03:35.599 --> 01:03:36.280
<v Speaker 4>Not going to happen.

1191
01:03:36.280 --> 01:03:39.440
<v Speaker 5>You're getting you're getting medically retired, like you need, you

1192
01:03:39.519 --> 01:03:41.000
<v Speaker 5>need to focus on something else.

1193
01:03:41.079 --> 01:03:41.760
<v Speaker 4>Let us help you.

1194
01:03:42.199 --> 01:03:46.639
<v Speaker 5>So they you know, they thought that what they were

1195
01:03:46.679 --> 01:03:51.000
<v Speaker 5>doing was beneficial to me. And in a way, you know,

1196
01:03:51.079 --> 01:03:54.719
<v Speaker 5>you do have to have management expectation of your life.

1197
01:03:55.280 --> 01:03:59.760
<v Speaker 5>But when you know, as as as as things started

1198
01:03:59.800 --> 01:04:05.039
<v Speaker 5>to take shape, and now you know, okay, I'm uh okay,

1199
01:04:05.039 --> 01:04:08.039
<v Speaker 5>I get read. The army decides, okay, yeah, we'll we'll

1200
01:04:08.039 --> 01:04:10.760
<v Speaker 5>give you a waiver to stay on after duty. All right, Yeah,

1201
01:04:10.760 --> 01:04:13.519
<v Speaker 5>you're moving through physical therapy. Things are going in this direction.

1202
01:04:14.119 --> 01:04:16.440
<v Speaker 5>Then you know, the the cheerleading squad gets a little

1203
01:04:16.440 --> 01:04:20.079
<v Speaker 5>bit bigger and bigger and bigger. But I do understand,

1204
01:04:21.360 --> 01:04:25.039
<v Speaker 5>you know there the motive behind what they were doing

1205
01:04:25.159 --> 01:04:31.199
<v Speaker 5>is because management expectation is extremely important for mental health.

1206
01:04:32.280 --> 01:04:33.840
<v Speaker 4>But yeah, no, it wasn't.

1207
01:04:34.480 --> 01:04:36.079
<v Speaker 5>I mean, there were there was a couple of people

1208
01:04:36.159 --> 01:04:39.280
<v Speaker 5>at the end that were just like I just didn't

1209
01:04:39.320 --> 01:04:42.760
<v Speaker 5>think this was possible. Like I, okay, I was wrong.

1210
01:04:43.199 --> 01:04:46.480
<v Speaker 5>My apologies, I was wrong, but I didn't do it

1211
01:04:46.480 --> 01:04:48.960
<v Speaker 5>for them. You know, whatever people I had to say

1212
01:04:49.519 --> 01:04:52.000
<v Speaker 5>say for me, and nobody was malicious about it.

1213
01:04:54.199 --> 01:04:55.880
<v Speaker 4>So yeah I did it. I did it for me.

1214
01:04:56.440 --> 01:04:57.440
<v Speaker 4>If you you.

1215
01:04:57.400 --> 01:05:00.000
<v Speaker 5>Know, there's no way in hell I would have played

1216
01:05:00.000 --> 01:05:04.480
<v Speaker 5>but that kind of blood, sweat, tons of tears into

1217
01:05:05.320 --> 01:05:07.960
<v Speaker 5>something like that if I was doing it for somebody else. Now,

1218
01:05:08.480 --> 01:05:10.360
<v Speaker 5>now you got to do it for yourself or you're

1219
01:05:10.639 --> 01:05:12.320
<v Speaker 5>you're not going to do it.

1220
01:05:12.599 --> 01:05:16.079
<v Speaker 2>Roger that awesome stuff again, folks, and it's really an

1221
01:05:16.079 --> 01:05:19.400
<v Speaker 2>amazing conversation. Sean. You brought this interview to another notch,

1222
01:05:19.400 --> 01:05:22.679
<v Speaker 2>another level. I can't thank you enough for that. Ryan.

1223
01:05:22.880 --> 01:05:25.280
<v Speaker 2>Like always, it's always a pleasure and honor to speak

1224
01:05:25.320 --> 01:05:28.480
<v Speaker 2>with you, my friend. Again, Folks, is Landmine Removal dot Org.

1225
01:05:28.480 --> 01:05:30.199
<v Speaker 2>Tip of the Spear, the incredible story of an injured

1226
01:05:30.239 --> 01:05:32.119
<v Speaker 2>green be Raisee we turned to battle. Ryan. I can't

1227
01:05:32.119 --> 01:05:34.159
<v Speaker 2>thank you enough for doing this. Thank you so much

1228
01:05:34.199 --> 01:05:35.039
<v Speaker 2>again for coming back.

1229
01:05:35.800 --> 01:05:38.960
<v Speaker 5>Yeah no, this was awesome. I appreciate you having me

1230
01:05:39.079 --> 01:05:41.159
<v Speaker 5>back on. I love love talking with you.

1231
01:05:41.639 --> 01:05:43.360
<v Speaker 2>And by the way, Ryan, I don't think I've ever

1232
01:05:43.440 --> 01:05:46.360
<v Speaker 2>told you. I show clips of your incredible story to

1233
01:05:46.480 --> 01:05:49.800
<v Speaker 2>my class every semester when we deal about resilience and

1234
01:05:49.800 --> 01:05:52.719
<v Speaker 2>trauma and how people overcome things. And each and every

1235
01:05:52.719 --> 01:05:54.920
<v Speaker 2>time the classes gets blown away when they see the

1236
01:05:54.920 --> 01:05:56.519
<v Speaker 2>clips the interview and they're like.

1237
01:05:59.360 --> 01:06:01.719
<v Speaker 4>Blown away. That's that's no puns.

1238
01:06:03.679 --> 01:06:04.960
<v Speaker 3>That's a great way to end it.

1239
01:06:07.239 --> 01:06:09.519
<v Speaker 2>Thank you Sean as well for joining me on the Thanks.

1240
01:06:10.159 --> 01:06:12.880
<v Speaker 2>Thank you everyone for listening. You know what to do, share, subscribe,

1241
01:06:12.960 --> 01:06:14.239
<v Speaker 2>hit that I like but you know we like it,

1242
01:06:14.280 --> 01:06:16.400
<v Speaker 2>and go check out Landmine Removal dot Org.