Speaker 1: Hello everyone, and welcome back to the Other podcast episode.
Speaker 1: My name is Alicia Gogin, the host of the Globe
Speaker 1: Secret Podcast. Why I help you expand your mind and
Speaker 1: become more self aware so that you can glow up
Speaker 1: into the best version of yourself. Okay, guys, so today's
Speaker 1: kind of like a random recording day for me. I
Speaker 1: wasn't really planning on recording, but there's been a few
Speaker 1: things that have been happening in my life, well many
Speaker 1: as you guys know, and with that there is a
Speaker 1: lot of realizations, there's a lot of lessons, there's a
Speaker 1: lot of messages that I've been getting and it's been
Speaker 1: steering up in my brain. So I was journaling this
Speaker 1: morning and I'm like, you know what, I need to
Speaker 1: bring it to the podcast. You need to hear this message.
Speaker 1: I do, and hopefully this will continue to open up
Speaker 1: a conversation for all of us and to think bigger
Speaker 1: and do bigger, which is the topic of this episode.
Speaker 1: So we really need to stop playing small in life,
Speaker 1: in love and money, in success, in career. We really
Speaker 1: need to stop. Now, there's a few things that have
Speaker 1: been happening in my life that given me inspiration to
Speaker 1: talk about this, but I want to talk about first
Speaker 1: one person and her name is Grow with Joe or Johannah. Actually,
Speaker 1: she is a very big content creator. She's actually from Toronto,
Speaker 1: which is amazing, and she's really an expander for me.
Speaker 1: But she's on YouTube, she's on Instagram. Her main thing
Speaker 1: is that she does like at home workouts. She has
Speaker 1: an app. I've actually worked with her brand a year
Speaker 1: or two ago on my vlog channel, like my YouTube channel,
Speaker 1: second channel. But anyways, she's amazing. She's very successful online.
Speaker 1: And she had posted a video the other day talking
Speaker 1: about how she gained ten million subscribers. And in that video,
Speaker 1: it wasn't about oh, you just need to post this
Speaker 1: type of content this many times a day, this that
Speaker 1: it was all just mindset shifts that she needed to
Speaker 1: make to really become this version of her that was
Speaker 1: successful beyond her even wildest dreams. And she's also very
Speaker 1: I was gonna say spiritual, but she's Christian, so religious,
Speaker 1: so some of her tips and like the mindset shift
Speaker 1: that she made was really connected to God. And I
Speaker 1: am not a Christian, but so much of what she
Speaker 1: was saying was just resonating with me so deeply, so
Speaker 1: for one, I definitely would suggest checking out her video.
Speaker 1: I will have it linked down below. But of course
Speaker 1: she was giving advice to people who kind of want
Speaker 1: to step into their purpose or you know, start their
Speaker 1: own business or start content creation or whatever, and of
Speaker 1: course I kind of had the same mindset when it
Speaker 1: comes to taking the leap of faith and knowing that
Speaker 1: you have a purpose and a passion and go towards
Speaker 1: that even if you're not ready. And I will kind
Speaker 1: of continue talking about that in this episode, but she
Speaker 1: said one thing that really stood out to me, and
Speaker 1: it really made me think about just every other area
Speaker 1: of my life too that I've seen myself play small
Speaker 1: and this is going to correlate a lot to love
Speaker 1: as well. And also side note, I've been seeing how
Speaker 1: a few of my anxiously attached videos have been not
Speaker 1: like going viral, but the algorithm is pushing them again
Speaker 1: and I'm seeing a lot of comments and how a
Speaker 1: lot of people have been really struggling with kind of
Speaker 1: like accepting the bare minimum. Like I can see what
Speaker 1: you guys are dealing with. So I think that this
Speaker 1: will resonate even outside of like finding your purpose or
Speaker 1: going for your dream life or things like that. But
Speaker 1: in that video, she was talking about playing small and
Speaker 1: how she really needed to challenge her mindset when it
Speaker 1: came to standing in smallness, and she was saying, like,
Speaker 1: you really have to stop standing in smallness. You have
Speaker 1: to really stop being okay with being small and playing
Speaker 1: small in your life. Whether that is you have a message,
Speaker 1: or you have something that you can bring to the world,
Speaker 1: but you're just playing small and you're keeping it to yourself,
Speaker 1: or you're not going for your dreams, or you're not
Speaker 1: pushing yourself. But I also think about this in the
Speaker 1: sense of, let's say, love, it's so important you start
Speaker 1: to point out and see within yourself how you are
Speaker 1: really standing in smallness and you are really accepting the
Speaker 1: bare minimum, and you are really sitting here and not
Speaker 1: being a bigger version of you. You're so used to
Speaker 1: accept the bare minimum. You're so used to constantly counting
Speaker 1: yourself out and not using your voice and not taking
Speaker 1: action towards things, and getting in your head about things
Speaker 1: and then never doing them. And this is what happens
Speaker 1: a lot too. And I've seen this in myself, whether
Speaker 1: it is with love or abundance or success. Sometimes we
Speaker 1: start getting really caught up with what is being presented
Speaker 1: in our lives, which is understandable. Somebody's not showing up
Speaker 1: for us, somebody's giving us a bare minimum, somebody's disappointing us,
Speaker 1: somebody's treating us poorly, or we're just so frustrated with
Speaker 1: the fact that we don't have our dream job or
Speaker 1: we don't have enough money. And on one hand, we
Speaker 1: can acknowledge those things, but sometimes we spend so much
Speaker 1: time reacting to the things that are not meant for
Speaker 1: us anyways. And if you want better relationships, if you
Speaker 1: want to be treated better, if you want to have
Speaker 1: that dream job, you have to stop responding to what's
Speaker 1: in front of you right now, because the dream version
Speaker 1: of you, the highest version of you, would they even
Speaker 1: be dealing with what you're dealing with right now? Would
Speaker 1: they be getting upset and arguing and negotiating and going
Speaker 1: back and forth with a person, place, or thing when
Speaker 1: it's the bare minimum? Anyways, And I know it's difficult,
Speaker 1: and it is important that we respond to certain things
Speaker 1: I'm not saying, be passive and never say what you
Speaker 1: need to say to somebody, or you know, respond to
Speaker 1: the chaos of your life obviously, but it is to
Speaker 1: see how sometimes we get so wrapped up and we
Speaker 1: start spiraling, and we start arguing with people, or we
Speaker 1: start just getting mad at life for it not presenting
Speaker 1: to us what we really want or what we believe
Speaker 1: we deserve. But we keep responding to it. We keep
Speaker 1: responding to it, We keep responding to the person who
Speaker 1: gives us the bare minimum. We need to stop being
Speaker 1: upset about that and be like, Okay, you know what
Speaker 1: I deserve more. I want this type of person in
Speaker 1: my life to show up this way. I want this
Speaker 1: dream job, I want more money, I want more success,
Speaker 1: I want more whatever. But I need to be the
Speaker 1: person that acts like they get that and would the
Speaker 1: dream version of me or even if you can think
Speaker 1: about this when it comes to relationships, I always say this,
Speaker 1: like your dream husband or your dream relationship, like, that's
Speaker 1: not how it would work out. Your dream husband wouldn't
Speaker 1: treat you like that. The dream version of you wouldn't
Speaker 1: even be entertaining somebody who treats you like crap. But
Speaker 1: you need to be the one that changes first. You
Speaker 1: need to be the one that stops responding to the
Speaker 1: things that you don't want in your life, you do
Speaker 1: deserve to have more abundance and more success, And quite frankly,
Speaker 1: you're so used to accepting the bare minimum. You're so
Speaker 1: used to not asking for a lot, you're so used
Speaker 1: to living in scarcity, because that's probably what you've came from,
Speaker 1: That's what I came from. I got really good at
Speaker 1: accepting the bare minimum from my parents. Doesn't mean that
Speaker 1: they didn't love me. It doesn't mean that, you know,
Speaker 1: they didn't try. But at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: like I was primed in my life to kind of
Speaker 1: accept the bare minimum, and I know in my adulthood
Speaker 1: life that I do deserve more. But it's going to
Speaker 1: be up to me to stand in that. It's going
Speaker 1: to be up to me to be like, you know what,
Speaker 1: I need more resources, I need people to show up
Speaker 1: for me. I need X, Y and Z. And it's
Speaker 1: not from this place of being egotistical. It's not from
Speaker 1: a place of being rude to people or hurting people
Speaker 1: or anything. It's just the fact of the matter that
Speaker 1: we do deserve a lot more things, but we are
Speaker 1: so used to standing in smallness. And you know, she
Speaker 1: was also saying in her video, how God and you
Speaker 1: can even think about this, just like the universe. If
Speaker 1: you don't believe in God, whatever, how God's given you
Speaker 1: a purpose or a desire or something. And even if
Speaker 1: you don't know that right now, what that is. God's
Speaker 1: given you something life force, energy is something to bring
Speaker 1: into this world and to share with people, to help people.
Speaker 1: And you're just going to stay small. You're just going
Speaker 1: to keep that to yourself. You're not going to go
Speaker 1: out into the world and help others, or inspire others,
Speaker 1: or use the talent that you have and change people's
Speaker 1: lives or whatever it is that you have. You're not
Speaker 1: gonna do that. You're just gonna stay small. You're not
Speaker 1: gonna be a source of love and support for other people,
Speaker 1: whatever it is. You're just going to stay small personally.
Speaker 1: For me, I don't think that's the best use of
Speaker 1: our time here now. I found this quote on Pinterress,
Speaker 1: because you guys know, I love me a good Pinterest quote,
Speaker 1: and it says you must allow yourself to outgrow and
Speaker 1: depart from certain eras of your life with a gentle
Speaker 1: sort of ruthlessness. And I'm going to bring it back
Speaker 1: to accepting the bare minimum or just being in relationships
Speaker 1: or even friendships or certain circumstances actually in your life.
Speaker 1: It doesn't even have to be relationships where you know
Speaker 1: it's half assed, you know it's not the best quality.
Speaker 1: You know, like it's not making you happy. It's not
Speaker 1: about arguing with people or getting even really angry, which
Speaker 1: maybe you do have some anger that you need to release,
Speaker 1: and maybe you don't need to release it on somebody else.
Speaker 1: Maybe it could be like journal or therapy or you know,
Speaker 1: with yourself, or if you are going to communicate with people,
Speaker 1: you do it in a way of understanding that they
Speaker 1: might be not fully ready to see it the way
Speaker 1: you see it regardless, it's like a separate type of conversation.
Speaker 1: But the way that I like to look at some
Speaker 1: of the situations that might be presenting in my life,
Speaker 1: I look at it with a gentle, compassionate understanding as
Speaker 1: much as I can heart and release it in the
Speaker 1: most understanding way of knowing that I deserve more. And
Speaker 1: I'm not even going to fight this reality right now?
Speaker 1: Right Why am I going to continue to spiral out
Speaker 1: and be anxious and be angry and try to really
Speaker 1: fight with life when I can just see it for
Speaker 1: what it is, This person, plays or thing that's just
Speaker 1: not exactly in alignment with who I am or what
Speaker 1: I deserve and what I know I deserve. Why don't
Speaker 1: I just see it for what it is, do my
Speaker 1: best to not react, which I understand it's hard to
Speaker 1: not react. Okay, this is just like in theory in
Speaker 1: a way, But do my best to not react so
Speaker 1: much and see it for what it is and be like,
Speaker 1: you know what, I'm going to release this that does
Speaker 1: not serve me. I know that the highest version of
Speaker 1: me wouldn't be responding and continuously negotiating and playing with
Speaker 1: this realm of life that does not serve me and
Speaker 1: I don't deserve. And I'm going to move into a
Speaker 1: new era of my life and I'm going to focus
Speaker 1: on what I know I deserve, which is more than this,
Speaker 1: which is better than this, And you really have to
Speaker 1: give yourself that gift. And I think about my inner child.
Speaker 1: I think about the young version of me that deserves
Speaker 1: so much more and deserved a lot more in her
Speaker 1: life when it came to what her parents could give her.
Speaker 1: And I look at some of the actions that my
Speaker 1: parents took, let's say, and as much as I've forgiven them,
Speaker 1: and I've moved on from a lot of it, and
Speaker 1: I've had to grieve many losses, all different aspects and
Speaker 1: chapters of my parents. The way that I didn't continuously
Speaker 1: spiral into the disappointment although there was a lot of it,
Speaker 1: or the sadness although there was a lot of it,
Speaker 1: or the same habits that my parents ended up going
Speaker 1: down the road that they went down when it came
Speaker 1: to like addictions and things like that. The way that
Speaker 1: I stopped myself from getting in those spirals was really
Speaker 1: looking at the situation for what it is and being like,
Speaker 1: you know what, Unfortunately I had these circumstances happen in
Speaker 1: my life, and although it impacted me and it did
Speaker 1: knock me down a few notches, what I'm not going
Speaker 1: to do to the best of my ability kind of
Speaker 1: let myself have to deal with the consequences of someone
Speaker 1: else's actions. And this is kind of like what I mean,
Speaker 1: And I think about this when it comes to like,
Speaker 1: let's say you're anxiously attached in someone's being really avoidant
Speaker 1: and they are not taking responsibility of communication in your
Speaker 1: relationship when they should. You know, they're not showing up
Speaker 1: for you or whatever it is really shitty that they're
Speaker 1: doing that, and them being avoidant is not only something
Speaker 1: you don't deserve, but on top of that, what ends
Speaker 1: up happening is is it elicits this feeling where you
Speaker 1: feel really crap about yourself and now you're anxious all
Speaker 1: day and you're spiraling and your second guessing yourself and
Speaker 1: you're waiting around, and it's like, you don't deserve to
Speaker 1: spend your entire day spiraling on somebody who's decided to
Speaker 1: be avoidant or decided to not show up for you.
Speaker 1: You don't deserve to spend your entire day suffering. And
Speaker 1: I understand why you do that, right, because you have
Speaker 1: that attachment. And it's not to say that you're never
Speaker 1: gonna have a reaction, right It's not like I've never
Speaker 1: had a reaction of feeling disappointed when my parents didn't
Speaker 1: show up for me. It's a natural human response. But
Speaker 1: I've tried to do my best over the years to
Speaker 1: kind of look at it from this like higher self
Speaker 1: lens and be like, Okay, your parents or your situation
Speaker 1: in life or whatever, these are the things that are happening,
Speaker 1: but you don't deserve to deal with the consequences of
Speaker 1: what's happening here. So can we do the best we
Speaker 1: can to remind ourselves that we deserve more than this?
Speaker 1: And how can we slowly stop responding to the it
Speaker 1: that's not ours, the avoidant attachments, the crappy situations that
Speaker 1: we were put in. And so when life is presenting
Speaker 1: something to me that's nothing that I deserve, of course
Speaker 1: I'll feel my feelings. Of course I'm not going to
Speaker 1: be perfect. Most likely I'm going to react to certain things,
Speaker 1: but I do my best to remind myself that I
Speaker 1: don't deserve to suffer more. Right, there's that impact, there's
Speaker 1: that pain, but then there's suffering and I don't deserve that.
Speaker 1: So I'm going to release this and I'm going to
Speaker 1: remind myself that I deserve more and I can be more.
Speaker 1: And what can I do in my present moment to
Speaker 1: keep myself on track? And I think this comes down
Speaker 1: to being brave as well, being brave and have encouraged
Speaker 1: that you do deserve more than what your current circumstance is,
Speaker 1: and that it might feel uncomfortable, but that you can
Speaker 1: do it, and that there is better people places than
Speaker 1: things that are coming to you outside of this crappy
Speaker 1: circumstance or situation whatever that you're currently in. So a
Speaker 1: few things that I can think of that have helped
Speaker 1: me through the times where I've been playing small, whether
Speaker 1: that it's in love or that's just me on my
Speaker 1: purpose or just bringing my gifts to the world. Our
Speaker 1: first definitely trying to do my best to not respond
Speaker 1: to what is happening from this old version of me
Speaker 1: and reminding myself, like the highest version of me and
Speaker 1: my dream life, like, it's not this. So if it's
Speaker 1: not this, then why am I wasting my time responding
Speaker 1: to this? Why am I accepting this? Why am I
Speaker 1: living in this version of me that I do not want?
Speaker 1: Whatever's happening right now is just a test, it's a lesson.
Speaker 1: Let me do my best to not respond to this.
Speaker 1: And what I like to do is to get very
Speaker 1: clear on the vision that I hold for myself, which
Speaker 1: is pretty easy when you look around in your environment
Speaker 1: and you realize, oh, I don't like this, that and
Speaker 1: the third get clear, get clear on your dreams, your
Speaker 1: dream life, your dream relateationship, how do you want to
Speaker 1: be treated? What exactly do you want? You get clear
Speaker 1: on that. So that when life presents you a half
Speaker 1: assed version of people, places, and things, you have more
Speaker 1: of a sense of no, no, thank you. But if you're
Speaker 1: not clear and you're not spending that time to really
Speaker 1: focus in and hone in on that, yes you will
Speaker 1: get confused. Yes you will go back to old ways
Speaker 1: and old patterns because that is what you're used to.
Speaker 1: Another thing I do is I really like to take action.
Speaker 1: This is kind of in alignment with being on purpose
Speaker 1: or feeling afraid to go and do X, Y and z,
Speaker 1: you know, start that new business or content creation or
Speaker 1: to podcast, or even just doing something for the first
Speaker 1: time and going out into the world or taking a
Speaker 1: new class or starting a hobby or meeting a new
Speaker 1: friend for the first time. Understand that you are really
Speaker 1: never going to be fully prepared. And I think taking
Speaker 1: action is so important because if you don't take action
Speaker 1: on your goals or the ideas that you have in
Speaker 1: your life, that is when you go back into this
Speaker 1: smallness and you start telling yourself you can't do it,
Speaker 1: I don't have enough resources, I'm not good enough. You
Speaker 1: start comparing yourself. That's another thing. You spend more time
Speaker 1: comparing yourself or looking grass is grainer over here. Look
Speaker 1: at how this person or that person is doing it,
Speaker 1: and that's not me, so I can't do it. Just
Speaker 1: that action will take away a lot of that negative
Speaker 1: self talk and second guessing and self doubt. And also
Speaker 1: what has helped me is to cultivate a practice of
Speaker 1: pouring into yourself and reminding yourself of small winds that
Speaker 1: you have had, or you have created, or you have
Speaker 1: achieved in your life, whether it is within love or
Speaker 1: just who you are as a person, or your career
Speaker 1: or whatever. Because I feel like if you don't pour
Speaker 1: into yourself and remind yourself of how great you are,
Speaker 1: how worthy and deserving you are, how all of the
Speaker 1: amazing things that you have accomplished in your life, you
Speaker 1: will get can you will forget that you deserve more.
Speaker 1: And it's not that you have to do things in
Speaker 1: order to be deserving of love or abundance or anything
Speaker 1: like that, but it does help for you to believe
Speaker 1: that you can have more in your life when you
Speaker 1: pour into yourself and you say, you know what, actually,
Speaker 1: I've done this that in the third and I've accomplished
Speaker 1: this thing, and I've been working myself out of these
Speaker 1: ruts and I show up for myself, and I show
Speaker 1: up for other people, and I'm kind and I'm loving,
Speaker 1: and I deserve more than this. I just deserve more
Speaker 1: than this. You have to remind yourself of that. But
Speaker 1: instead you sit here and you question why you get
Speaker 1: the bare minimum, why you get these half assed things.
Speaker 1: Stop doing that. You don't need to second guess your worth.
Speaker 1: You don't need to second guess yourself. Stop letting what
Speaker 1: is currently happening in your life question your worth. Okay,
Speaker 1: you have to remind yourself of your worth. Stop responding
Speaker 1: to the things that are not in alignment with you.
Speaker 1: This is not the things that you want anyways. Let's
Speaker 1: stop doing that as much as we can, and let's
Speaker 1: do more for ourselves. Let's play bigger. Let's do more.
Speaker 1: We need to do more. We need to step outside
Speaker 1: of comfort zones. And we know we need to do
Speaker 1: that because what we desire is bigger than ourselves. Your
Speaker 1: dream life, your dream home, dream relationship, dream family, friends, experiences,
Speaker 1: whatever it is that is bigger than you right now,
Speaker 1: it's going to require a new version of you. It's
Speaker 1: going to require you to think bigger. So stop getting
Speaker 1: wrapped up in the smallness of what is right now.
Speaker 1: Respectfully walk away from people, respectfully, see things for what
Speaker 1: it is, don't take it personally. Understand these things are
Speaker 1: a lesson and move forward. Focus on what you do want,
Speaker 1: what you do deserve, and love yourself more than these situations.
Speaker 1: Remind yourself that you are bigger than what is currently
Speaker 1: going on in this reality, and stay strong and show
Speaker 1: up for yourself as much as you can. You do
Speaker 1: not need to be perfect, but you do deserve more.
Speaker 1: But it is going to be you who gives yourself
Speaker 1: that gift, and you that remind yourself of that, and
Speaker 1: you that starts to take that action away from the
Speaker 1: things that do not serve you. Sometimes it can be
Speaker 1: lonely when you are choosing yourself and you are healing
Speaker 1: and you are prioritizing yourself. But understand that this is
Speaker 1: way better for you than half ass versions of people, places,
Speaker 1: and things. These are patterns, These are cycles that you
Speaker 1: are breaking. Recognize when you start going back into these patterns.
Speaker 1: Because you go into these patterns a lot with certain people,
Speaker 1: or you know, certain projects that you're working on, or
Speaker 1: in school situations, whatever it is, just be very aware
Speaker 1: of when you're going into these circumstances and remind yourself
Speaker 1: and have that little pep talk and be like, we
Speaker 1: are not doing this smallness, We're not doing it. We
Speaker 1: are not doing it. We're going to do the best
Speaker 1: that we can with reminding ourselves that we deserve more. Okay,
Speaker 1: So that's going to be it for today's episode. It
Speaker 1: was kind of quick for my episodes. I hope this
Speaker 1: helped in some way. If you want more advice on anything,
Speaker 1: let me know, like if you want me to expand
Speaker 1: on something. This is definitely a message that I I
Speaker 1: continuously have to remind myself of and it's very prevalent
Speaker 1: because also, like I said, with Joe's video, it was
Speaker 1: very clear that the universe or God or my mom
Speaker 1: I should say, is sending me signs and being like, hey, reminder, reminder,
Speaker 1: no more staying small, no more procrastinating, no more getting
Speaker 1: in your way, no more putting things off and being like, oh,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do it when I'm perfect or it just
Speaker 1: has to be perfect. Da da take action now, stop
Speaker 1: responding to the things that you know you don't deserve,
Speaker 1: and keep it pushing, and you will see it be
Speaker 1: reflected in your life and it will be better than
Speaker 1: you can even imagine. Okay, all right, I hope you
Speaker 1: guys enjoyed it, and I'll see in the next one. Bye.