Speaker 1: Welcome back to there to see it. I am so excited.
First of all, our first two episodes, y'all didn't play
on my name like I told y'all to, and I
was so excited about We've been getting so many great
reviews and just so much great feedback on our episode.
So thank you so much to everyone who has tuned in.
We are on episode three and I have to say this,
Let's start this shit the fuck over. First of all, Baby,
May was a crazy month for me, so I was
kind of scudadling. Okay, I was scadadling in May, but
it's June. Don't play on my wig, don't play on
my name, don't play on my mother fucking fit. Okay, babe.
We had to, okay, scratch them first two episodes, okay,
because that wasn't really how I represent y'all know what,
Chicago girl. Don't play about her hair, so don't play
about me, don't play about my lace, don't play a
boy my name. Okay, buzz down, middle custom baby Okay.
Christopher Kyle on the Week, all right, had I had
to catch up. You know, I didn't want to delay
y'all because I said that the episodes were coming in May. Okay,
so I didn't want to delay too long. But we
back live trio how it's supposed to be. Okay, I'm
very very excited about that. Okay. So a couple reminders, okay,
subscription reminders, follow the dere to see you on Apple
and Spotify, you know, all you non non Apple users. Okay,
you can follow us on Spotify, Apple Music follow us,
and also please leave us a five star review, not three,
not to five. Okay, don't play with me. Subscribe to
our YouTube channel. Okay, And we have a goal by
Labor day. We want to do fifty thousand followers, okay,
fifty thousand followers on Apple Podcasts, five hundred reviews. We're
already at over two hundred fifty. So we already have
for their baby, we already have for there, and we
only on the look second episode. Okay, so we're doing good.
And then we need one hundred thousand subscribers on both channels.
That is, I believe you're to see it or to
see an XBS and then also relationship restored. Okay, so
mab one hundred thousand subscribers. We're already there.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: We having a ball. It's a good time. This is like,
this is my dream. I'm not know if I ever
share this job. This is like my dream. And I
always say one chair of one mic is my ideal platform.
And we were gonna have a good time. It's only
gonna get better from this. Okay, Look the wig already better. Okay, life, Look,
life is good. Okay, everything is better. All right, we're
already on our thirty episode, so this is gonna be good. Now.
Speaker 3: I forgot to also tell you to mention that we
top five in the relationship Okay.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so once upon a time, okay, Dre who
is over Relationship Restored and our platform that we post
on right, okay, so you know, y'all, everybody knows that
this platform is my podcast is hosted by Relationship Restored.
And he told me that our platform was our podcast
was like number thirty. Then I think we moved to
number eight. And then once upon a time I was
barbacuming on the rooftop and he was like, to see it,
we number five, and you know what the thing about
just imposter syndrome. I did not believed. I believe them
and I had never looked at it. But I went
back and I scrolled and he was like, you know,
it's thousands of podcasts, and I was like, you know what.
The craziest thing, y'all, this is my trauma. I don't
already paid the lady about this. Okay, I've already paid
my therapist about this, but the trauma in me was like,
maybe because our platform is called Relationship Restored that I
just automatically shot up the shot, like shot shot up
the charts with this being a relationship podcast, and it's honestly,
it's not. Okay, so I'm looking dead at the camera.
It didn't just hit because it's under a relation. It
hit because I'm the fucking shit and our podcast and
shit and it's just so good. It's just so freaking good.
And for all of you around the Ray girls, all
of you girls that's growing up in the projects, all
of you girls, this has been like my dream. I
want to speak to the everyday woman, look, the hood girls,
the ratchet girls, baby, the sexy reds, the bus down middle.
I am for you. We are here, and y'all, we
are number five and we could be something else by
the end of this week. Okay, So I don't know
who the one, two, three, and four is but I'm
on your ass and that's that. I'm on your ass.
I don't know who won two three and four, but
I think being number five, we were the top black
relationship podcast in the world right now. And again I
don't know who won two three four. I've never heard
on people, but I'm on your ass and I'm coming
for your spot. And that's that on that period.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 1: Anyways, now onto our Pinat gallery. We had Gabby here.
I always like to tell a story about how I
met all of my friends. Okay, so once upon a time,
Gabby hosts events here in DC and her business partner
reached out to me and was like, Gabby wants you
to come to this event. I had no clue and
this was like my entry into like the DC night life,
Like who's whole crowd, Like I have really been like
a low key person. That's just a testament to say,
like you never know who's watching you. And he was like,
Gabby wants to invite you to this event. And this
was really I think it was at liv Or twelve Stories. Yeah,
Leve and we went we went out and I was
I remember walking in and she was like, to see
you and I was like, I think, you know, black girls,
we changed our hair all the time. I didn't quite
gather what was happening. But let me tell you, Gabby
is the truth. And I loved her now and she
has been the sweetest, warmest, bubbly spirit ever since then.
And I promise you, like I had never really sought
to be on like the DC kind of, but I
just feel like knowing you, it was like, Okay, this
is like the doors are open, and I feel.
Speaker 5: Like we've been We've been out. We've been hanging and
you have been outside. Very custy though, but.
Speaker 1: Outside I've been outside. Anyways, if you want to hang
out a DC baby, hit follow Gabby, follow Lydy in
the City, all great energy, Great Energy group, okay, and
they're all the events from fitness to mental health to
like health in general, from partying, all different type of events. Okay,
Like if you want to if you want to be
in the mix in DC, follow Great Energy Group, Follow
Lydy in the City, follow Gabby and follow what's it
Mark Polo? You know Polo? You know Polo? Okay, period, Okay,
that's gonna put you in all the parties. All you
need to know Anyways, though, love Gabby all the time,
love you. Yes, it's been so good. Okay. So we
have been saying that we want to get to five
hundred reviews on Apple Podcasts. We're at two hundred and
fifty reviews. I want to share a a review that
really touched my spirit, okay, and it said wow to
see you. I absolutely loved in capital letters Okay this
episode of this episode, the space felt so cozy and inviting.
The questions were thoughtful and real, and the way you
broke down each topic was Chef's kiss. The Fragrance moment
was everything. Congrats on that beautiful purchase. By the way,
that was the most money I ever spent on a
Fragrant show. The lighting and the audio were on point two.
You both are creating something so special and powerful here.
I'm so proud of you. Keep shining and sharing your magic.
Love you, Mama Sita or Mosa Nancy And so funny
thing is that and she wouldn't care if I share this,
but Nancy is a part of my Secret girl Chat.
And the Secret Girl Chat is a space that I
created for like women to share and have their own
kind of space without men in our business and Nancy.
We helped escape from a crazy, crazy, abusive situation. We
helped her get a new apartment, she got a new vehicle,
she got I mean this review because I've seen this
review is from Nancy, and Nancy is a testament to
what My Secret Girl Chat is about. When I first
met Nancy, she was telling me about simple, minuscule things
that this man was doing to her, and I was
just like, you gotta get out of there. He's terrible
for you. And long story shore, Nancy ended up plotting,
and the man came home and her sister was there
packing her shit up. So join my Secret Girls Chat.
If you feeling like you don't know how to get out,
join my Secret Girls Chat. Nancy and I have become
very close. I went out to La. I've seen her
in California, in San fran and it's just so crazy
how women just stick together. Anyway, So shout out to Nancy.
Love you, Nancy, Thank you for leaving the review. Are
we on to our first red flag report. In a
recent interview with Real ninety two point three, La Brittany
Renner revealed that she and Kevin Gates got married on
April sixth and separated just fifty two days later.
Speaker 6: He got married April six and divorce made twenty eighth.
She divorced, yes, but there is a ninety day waiting
period in Islam where it's basically you have ninety days
to see if you're pregnant because then the you know,
he would be responsible, right. And then also in those
ninety days it's for reconciliation because the law wants you
to stay married. And then during those ninety days you
are not to like entertain anybody romantically. So what I
will say is that Islam has made my life a
lot easier. I think, even with this transition and you know,
things changing, you know, honestly, it's like, I don't think
anybody gets married to not stay married. So I think
my biggest thing for me is this is a nice
ninety day reset, just focusing on myself and pouring into myself.
And what I also will add is that I followed
my heart. And that's more than what most people can
say in this world.
Speaker 1: Let me tell y'all this, I have become a slow
burn girl. Okay. I always say, you don't want to
be a coffee girl. You want to be a tea girl.
If you want to learn how to be a tea girl.
Get into my Secret Girls shadow. Okay. The coffee girls
are hooked on crack. Okay. The coffee girls are like, woooo,
they're crazy people. All right. It's just you need a high.
You're picked up. You just you want to be a
tea girl. Tea is soothing, Tea is calm. Tea is
when you and you got coffee and coffee here. Yes,
crazy and crazy, okay. Kevin Gates and Brittany Winner are
both too loose. Growls all right, Brittany call me okay.
The last episodes we talked about Carle al right, y'all,
both on his love and hip hop basketball wive situation. Brittany,
because Babe, I could have told you that I didn't work.
That wasn't gonna work. Okay, two coffee people. If you
think about it, like Britney was kind of a she
was up their energy and just her persona was kind
of very loud. And then you got Kevin.
Speaker 2: You don't get tired.
Speaker 1: He got two phones. Okay. You got Kevin out here
humping and pumping on stage telling you what he gonna do.
He goes. You saw him on Karsha. Please the shouts
to Krisha, Okay, you saw him on Karsha, please tell
it all his business, all right? And then you got
with another wild card. I like that, and you thought
that that was gonna be that was the one. Yeah,
that that that I sense that that wasn't gonna really
work out. Actually was surprised. How you know, you know what?
I always say this, No, I always feel like you know,
Instagram TikTok and sit like that you don't really get
to say what you want to say. But now I'm
like feel like this is like my shit. One chair,
one mic, one chair mover. I want to say, Kevin,
if you I'm looking at the camera, I'm saying this,
if you Drinka for Britney Renner, I'm not over it.
I'm never gonna be fucking over it. You went from
growing plants, from having a fucking farm to being a
just natural beauty. To Britney Renner, you should be a
fucking shame of yourself, and Islam is ashamed of you
as well. But Islam is like, Kevin, what the hell
are you doing?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's interesting, she said love. I was saying love.
Speaker 1: Okay, fifty two days you married this man and was
parading him all around stage, and he was all up
in the comments, all up in the comments defending it.
Kevin Gates is a wild card, and I just feel like, wow,
see that's doubt. The ideal match was wild Card with Drinka,
who is a calm, rounded, grounded person. Okay, yeah, you
know Drika supposedly popped out when a new Bay as well.
My sister was telling me about that, okay, and look,
we're gonna talk about that later. But like Tiana Taylor's summer,
a cash doll summer.
Speaker 2: Baby, because baby, they're not looking.
Speaker 1: At pop out out, hopped out.
Speaker 2: For surprising man with the birthday dinner and hello cash doll.
Speaker 5: And I'm briating his name right now. They look so
great in there on the brown leather for the BT words.
I was like period period and he like loves out
loud and just like they.
Speaker 1: Bled the family together, the kids are together everything. Look errant, Pierre,
that's what that's what? Baby? Have you? A Tiana Taylor
cash doll motherfucking summer? Okay, that's jo Okay, anyways, let
me get out star Brittany Renner slipped up baby. He
he was not mature enough to handle where she was
once upon a time. Even in therapy, I've heard that
like when you experienced trauma, you stop, like even like
mental and emotional development where you are. And I think
that Brittany is probably a sixteen year old, get what
I'm saying, and Kevin wasn't mature enough to go and
dig her up out of there.
Speaker 5: I don't know if there's enough time to even get there.
I feel like I feel like they were dating and
they were married. I was like, oh, we moved quick,
and I was maybe I'm missing it, but I was like,
I mean.
Speaker 1: She had a ring, she was in the music video.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was like, oh, but you know what, you know, I.
Speaker 1: Could say this could this my shit? And one thing
about me? Maybe this is my shit, and I could say,
you know what, a lot of men like that. I
think Kevin was looking for someone naive and agile and moldible,
and Britney was just like kind of looking for that escape,
you know, she was looking for She had been run
through by these NBA niggas, She had been run through
by all these the yeah, and now she was looking
for somebody to really kind of step in, and that
be the thing. A lot of religion be it's too
like masks. Women think that men that are religious religious
are going to like be like upfront and like upright,
and just like the structure. Dumb niggas be the worst.
They be the worst ones. Don't. Look, you ever did
the PK a preacher's kid?
Speaker 2: I haven't, But I've seen them from a farm.
Speaker 1: Outside, right, I'm like, don't pre can preacher's kids? Them
ones that come from a I'm like, oh, okay, it's
almost less risky today's Look, I really say, look, give
me a single parent household. The ones that come from
there working with upfront, Okay, they'd be one to adopt
their whole parents marriage. That's a whole nother thing. Anyways,
maybe Kevin one gonna come get you out of the
debt that she was in. Okay, he couldn't pay that call.
So that's just that's just is what it is, you know.
It was just he was just she was just too
far gone, and I think she needed somebody more mature
and more grounded to come and dig her out of that. Literally,
it was loose cannon. With loose cannon, both Brittany and I.
Speaker 2: Want to see her like single and just like by herself.
Speaker 1: Brittany called me, I will tell you have that how
to have the best single life you ever had. Okay,
before she met Kevin, her whole trope on basketball wives
was like I'm single and I'm dating. That was the
whole thing. And then next you know, she popped out
with her husband. That man. That man was looking and
he was watching and he was praying and he was like,
oh okay, I get I know, I know she vibrating low. Anyways, anyways,
Brittany called me. We all knew that that wasn't gonna work. Kevin,
stick with more of Drinka's kind, okay, because you need
you need somebody more ground than anyways. Anyways, Draka said
Brittany was a crazy dip and there ain't no shade
on Brittany, but like he gotta write the first time,
all right, drink to make sure you have fun as well. Anyways,
topic number two Okay. In a recent lip Service with
Angela Yee interview, a guest says he wants a woman
to want him for his money. Let me ask you this,
how do you know a woman doesn't want you just
for your money or for your.
Speaker 7: I want a woman woman for my money. I'm a provider.
Want me to provide? Why are you choosing me? You
want an alpha man. I'm sure I'm an alpha man.
I'm here to take care of your every needs. And
that's not just financially, that's mentally, that's emotionally, that's spiritually,
because I'm here to lead in every aspect of my life,
because I know what you're gonna bring to me. When
I put you in an environment of peace, When I
put you in a environment when you feel secure, you're
gonna elevate. And when a woman elevates, good women are
going to elevate the men right next to them. So
you'll become my diamond in a rough How.
Speaker 1: Do you know who's a good woman and who's not.
Speaker 7: I don't worry about that. I'm a good man. I
don't care if you're if you're tarnished, I'm going.
Speaker 1: To perfect you.
Speaker 7: If I'm a good man, this is going to happen.
Speaker 2: I love this. I'm here for it.
Speaker 1: Do you have cousins or any uncles? Okay? Do you
have brothers or any kinfolk? Baby? Okay? Just thing? Because
I all people think I'm Christ, I'd be like, bring
back the barbershop men. Okay, remember the man that just
going to the barbershop having a talk. They got a
clean fail, low fade. Okay, we don't the man with
the brush. The men with the okay, they got the
they taking more time than you. We need to bring
back the barbershop me and I feel like this is
the barbershop man. Okay. Yes, he's saying he's a provider, provider,
and he wants a woman to want him for his money.
You know what I think is so interesting women When
women are talking about like I want to provide a man,
or I want some man that's successful, we're for We're
forgetting that provider. There are so many habits and lifestyle
like lifestyle adjectives that come with being successful. These are
the same men that are disciplined, that are working now,
that are getting out getting up early in the morning,
that have very good daily habits that actually equal success.
So it's not that like I'm a gold digger, but
just like I don't date men that don't wake up,
that wake up after nine a m. Because what are
you doing?
Speaker 2: You know it will be signs.
Speaker 1: So I don't think this is that this is a
walking red flag in affirmation talk.
Speaker 2: This is like a man's man.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and we're all waiting on these type of men
to come back. Lord, dear God, the man that you
sent us. Can we have a new shipment? Okay, the
men that you sent us. We're waiting for more to
be dropped off. Okay, can we have a new shipment
because these are the ones that we want. Okay, I
want a woman to want me for my money. Okay.
I was watching a podcast, maybe a couple of months ago,
and the guy was like, you know, do you want
to don't you if you pay for the first five
or ten dates, don't you want a woman to pay
for the next one? And unanimously all of them men
were like, no, okay, I don't want my woman to
pay for the date? What and where are these men
when we don't want to We don't want to pick
up the tab. That is not my currency in life.
And people think I'm crazy. I don't pay for dates.
I don't care if it was three dates, I don't
care if it was five dates. I don't care if
it was eight dates. And I get this question all
the time, Well, when do you think it's a safe
time to pick up the tab? I'm not doing it.
That's not my currency. I've added value to your life
before I even sat down at this table. Okay, I
don't you want to embarrass me in public by having me.
Speaker 2: Can we talk about that?
Speaker 5: Because when you do pull out a car, it sometimes
emasculates the man, and sometimes the man's like, wait, hold on,
hold on.
Speaker 8: Right, heir.
Speaker 1: Find you a man that's that feels conflicted when you
want to pay, even on his birthday. I have dated
man and I've been like, hey, it's your birthday, I'm
gonna pay. And after I paid, the man was like,
that was uncomfortable. Find you a man that's uncomfortable okay
with you pulling out your car and paying that fucking bill.
Speaker 5: Because they are out there, out there, are out there,
they're like, wait.
Speaker 1: Hold on, don't play on my name.
Speaker 2: You can sell.
Speaker 1: Like I always tell this story, Once upon a time
I had a Halloween party. You were there, gavy. I
had a Halloween party and this a friend of mine
was like, to see you. I heard what you're saying online.
Why why can't you pay for a day? If a
man paid for a day and my ex was there
and I said, hey, I dated this man ten years ago.
And since I've known him. I have never paid for
a day and I said, actually, I think I paid
for one day, and that man's there. My ex said, hey,
you didn't pay for that date. I went to the
bathroom and when I came back, the bill was paid.
Don't never tell anybody you pay for hello, he said.
He said, don't ever tell anybody you paid for it.
He didn't even want that on his name. Okay, I pass,
he said, no, you tricked me. I went to the
bathroom and when I came out, the bill was paid.
And when you want to know what I loved about that,
it was man to man. As a woman, sometimes you
gotta let grown men have their own fucking conversations. And
there was a grown man telling another grown man that
she ain't gonna pay for a date while she with me.
And that's the problem. These men got their own platforms,
their own podcasts, and the women got their own podcasts,
and nobody let the men talk to the fucking men.
Because his grown ass told his grown ass that she
ain't never paid for nothing while she's with me. And
you know what he said, Oh so he is who
spoiled you? And I sat there in all my fucking
glory and smiled. Okay, you need more men telling you
that he willing to pick up that fucking bill. That's
what you need. More men need to hear other grown
ass men saying, hey, I take pride and picking up
that fucking bill. I take pride and covering the fucking costs.
And don't ever tell anybody. He was like, cut the show,
cut it that only the table cut the show. No,
you went to the back. I went to the bathroom.
When I came back, that bill was paid. So don't
don't ever tell nobody that. Ever the fuck again. And
I was glad that he heard a man saying that
because clearly, look, I'm just living for the first time,
all right, So they don't want to listen to me,
but listen to another man telling you that he covered
the fucking costs and he will always if his name
is on it on that tab. Okay, that's it on that.
So anyways, were looking for the men like him. Okay,
where you at, friend, let me know if you have
any uncles cousins. My limit is about thirty thirty two,
said if you got cousin other look, we looking for y'all,
all right, were looking for these type of men the
alpha males. It's like, I want a woman to want
how proud you should be? You should be proud. Yeah,
that you're in a tax bracket where a woman is like,
while you're dependable, you're reliable, you've made a name for yourself.
Speaker 2: A safe space, a safe space.
Speaker 1: Okay, period. Anyways, all we want to are a bitch
you Smell Good segment. It's one of my fas. That's
one of my favorite segments. Okay, let's see so our
new fragrance. This is a mystery scent. And the reason
this is my bitch you Smell Good segment Okay, and
my bit you Smell Good segment is my child is
like my baby. Anybody knows me knows that I love fragrance,
and I have over a two hundred fragrance. So the
reason why I'm not going to a coffee day is because
I have a fifty thousand dollars fragrance collection. Baby, A
few springs my perfume is gonna cost me more than
a mop with chocolate, Okay, And that's why I'm not
going out on a coffee date with nobody's son. Okay,
But I love my bitch you Smell Good segment and
this fragrance is so special because this was a fragrance
gifted by Brion Dre, my very good friends after we
launched Dear to see It. Okay, So this was a
fragrance that I was gifted almost like a you know
how you go and you buy a new home and
you get like those new homeowner gifts. This was my
new podcast gift from my dear friends Dre and breathe,
and I'm so very excited. First of all, get into
the bag, y'all, realdy know how we coming. Oh okay,
we're coming period. Yeah, okay, y'all, Red know, y'all ready know.
And I saved it because I got this a week
or two ago, okay, and I saved it so that
we can open it up here. Look at the wrapping.
Speaker 2: It's the detail.
Speaker 7: Else.
Speaker 2: I love it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I am so excited, y'all. I don't get excited
about many things. I was cheering with Dre this, I said,
I don't get excited about a lot of things. You
can tell me, baby that I'm going to the Maldi's
a bora bora all expense paid and not probably be
like great, thanks, But when it comes to this space
that I am created in my podcast. I am just
really over the fucking moon. Okay, I am over the moon.
So anyways, this is our new fragrance. Oh my god.
Look look I love an unboxing chaw. Okay, it's gonna
be so good. Okay, let's see what we got, y'all.
Let me tell you. And this is no see but
I'm so glad that this is not Baccarat. It's not
it's not and you know we off of baccaraa okay,
Baccara is very twenty twenty two baites Okay, so if
you want s on bccarack, okay, very twenty twenty two.
These are smart people. This is grand sore. Okay, I'm
opening up.
Speaker 3: The lady at the store says she was a fragrance
expert and I told her about you, so we'll see
if she actually picked something that was good.
Speaker 1: I'm sure she did. Okay, I'm sure she did. I
don't have this one, Okay, I have gentle fluidity. I
do have Bacca rod from and I have what's the one?
I have like three from, but I don't have this one.
So this is so good, so excited, Okay, let me
pull off. Why am I always struggling on scrings. Open
the box. It's given very goramand let me let me,
let me read the notes. I knew it. Gormond dish,
very grimands.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: We have cinnamon tree obtained from distilling the leaves of
the tropical tree. Okay, a cinemonium.
Speaker 8: Right.
Speaker 1: We have vanilla amber accord very grimonds. Okay. Let me
tell you this. If you got a fragrance that have
a base of vanilla, that's all you need, baby. Okay,
cist lab danium the wild shrub grows and the arid
soils around the Mediterranean. Okay, and then we have lavender
and y'all know what I tell y'all. Pronunciation police will
be blocked. Do not come up in my comments. And
that's not how you say it. I will block you, okay, period,
I will block you. And that's that. On that, let's see.
Let's see what we got, mama.
Speaker 6: Truth.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, can you smile from over there? No,
you probably can't. This is real grown, this is given. Okay,
let me tell you this. I don't got no reason
to lie. This is this is giving date nights, y'all.
I have a date coming up June eighteenth, period with
my man that I already text my friends and told
them that I met my husband in the airport. I'm
wearing this fragrance on our date. We're onna deal friscos.
I hope he ain't listen to this. Please don't listen
to this. I'm warned this out on my date.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, she likes it.
Speaker 1: This is good. It's very soul tree, it's very sexy.
It's very literally like date night grown. And y'all know
I like to smell like a man. Okay. I've always
said that I am not your fruity floral girl. I'm
not your fruity floor I am a gormand ood okay girl.
All right, And if it I needed, I needed to
look siage, I needed to follow me wherever I freaking go. Okay,
So this is good. Shout out to Dream and bred
G and Bray Bright, Brie and Dre. Shout out bre
and Dre. Okay, this was a per pick.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: Listen to y'all counter professionals, all right, because I have
a few. I have gentle fluidity. I have a few
from Masons, Francis Kirk Jehn Okay, but I do not
have this one.
Speaker 3: I'm glad you like it.
Speaker 1: I'm about to be real grown. Okay, this summer, I
love it, love it, love it, love it. Gonna grab
y'all this okay, anyways, perfect gift. Thank y'all so much.
And this is really because y'all went up on the YouTube. Okay,
this was YouTube Spotify, Apple Music. Y'all really show us
an incredible time and we're just so excited. So that
was my Dear to See a podcast gifts so sweet.
Speaker 2: So sweet.
Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, bitch, you smell good. Follow my page. Okay,
that was a wonderful, wonderful fragrance. I can still smell it.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: So our third segment here is from Dear to See You.
This is our updated voicemail. Okay, we have an update
from a voicemail. Shall I readistray? Okay, you'll play.
Speaker 8: It, Okay, Dear to See It, thanks for answering my
question on your show. I was the one that wrote
in about hating everyone, and you are absolutely right. By
the time that you recorded this show, from when I
sent it in, I had got off the apps and
I actually met two white men in person that made
me excited about dating again. And so yeah, the app
is not for me, but meeting people in person definitely
makes a difference, and I'm having fun with it, like
you said, so I'm definitely you know, I've never really
dated a white man before, but I'm open into it now.
I've had fun on the first two dates and I'm
just seeing where it goes. So I actually want to
get out of my bed. So yeah, I think I
was just not reading meeting the right type of men.
But I know you you know, give these answers and
you don't always hear back from the people. But yeah,
you definitely know what you're talking about because the advice
that you gave was exactly what I did. And yeah,
I don't think my standards are too high. I just
was meeting the wrong type of men. So thanks again.
Speaker 1: I love that the note says, updated voicemail, you were
right to see a girl. I know. I'm telling you
what I heard. I'm telling you what I know, baby. Okay,
I knew number one that she could have been neuro divergent.
So she basically wrote in and said that she like
every time she gets to the date point, she kind
of flakes out and she's no longer interested. And that
is like a lot of women that are new diverging,
whether it's like even like autistic on the spectrum, you
have ADHD, you have anxiety, anything like that. This is
what I see a lot where the hype of like
finding the men and clicking on them, and even the
startup conversations, but then the it goes down once the
date is actually set. Let me tell you this. The
girls are putting creaming in coffee.
Speaker 2: Gabby with my mom just the other day about it,
and I was like, Mom.
Speaker 1: She was like, Babby, you're you're a white man's dream.
Speaker 5: I was told that I'm just like white man's dream.
Speaker 1: Okay, I listen, I'm looking dead in the camera. I
know I'm not a for a white man child. Okay,
look it looks too much flavor, too much sauce on
this are right, too many curves, too many too much black. Okay.
You know the the the white man like a cauld
swing either way, you know, God, the white man like
it where it could swing kind of either And I
already know I'm I'm swinging one way and that's for
the culture.
Speaker 6: Child.
Speaker 1: But Gabby, you are a white fast dream. FYI. If
you ever wan let me know if you do.
Speaker 2: I haven't well.
Speaker 5: I went on one day and he was a little
bit too old, but he was just like no other
whiteman trying to talk to you. And I was like no,
I said, don't they liked me? He was like, no,
you're in the wrong pools.
Speaker 1: Yes, lay around. We need to have a cute DC
summer and player. I wanna go to a lot of
these little cute posh hotels, go to it at the
bar while they have a happy hour and having their
business meetings. I got a list of white men magnet bars. Anyways,
I'm excited. She said. She never dated out of her
race before, but she's excited. You know what's interesting. A
lot of women asked me like, how do you know
if you're ready to like date again? How do you
know if you're ready to step out there and date?
And I said, you want to be excited like you
you know if you I feel like there's p in
a dating pool. I don't want to do this no more.
Speaker 6: Girl.
Speaker 1: Truth is, I'm tired. Options are few, Like, this is
not the time for you to be dating. But she
said she's excited. She met two white men and person
who reignited her excitement about that. You know what, the
funniest thing I'm going here tell her all my business.
You know, the funniest thing is that I was telling
my friend. I said, girl, I got a date on
June eighteenth, and I bought an outfit.
Speaker 4: Job.
Speaker 1: Now, I don't buy an outfit from none of these
men because honestly, I feel like they can't dress. DC
men are weird. None of these men can't dress, So
why am I even wasting my clothes?
Speaker 2: BA?
Speaker 1: But you don't know what this is? Findy time for
it in beliinsiaga. Okay, you can't even you can't spot
a brand if it. You don't even know that this
is a ooh from Dubai. You don't know nothing. So
it's like, why am I wasting my outfits and all
of my good fits on it? It's just depressing. But
I bought a new outfit for my men. Were gonna
call him Airprie. I pray he never listens to this, y'all.
Speaker 2: I'm excited. The Peanut gallery is excited because I'm ready.
Speaker 1: I'm ready. Okay, I bought a real outfit. I'm planning
for you know, I saw. I hope you never watch
a show I talked to him today and he was like, well,
we were texting and I was like, one week to
our who am I? Who am I? I was like
one week and you know what? He said this, I
know I'm gonna write I'm in the right fucking zone.
He said, that's just way too long. Period. We got
one week. This is our one week anniversary to our date. Okay,
we got one week until our date. And he was like,
it just seems so far away. Yeah, that's what I need. Okay,
I need.
Speaker 2: You to relate that.
Speaker 1: Catch catch your early flight. If you're nasty, Okay, hop
on that flight two three days early. Okay, if you
miss me that much? All right, anyway, shout out to
airport Bay. I already said to death. I have to
keep people up to date now, I know, right you
people have been like, okay, I to see it. When
did you become a coach? I said, y'all. Facebook reminds
me that in two thousand and fourteen, like years ago,
oh my god, twenty eleven, I was I was living
in New York and I was literally telling them about
all of my like bays and Booze. It was like
I was living in New York. I was like, oh,
this is a trash man bad, this is a guy
man by the two trend, this is whatever. And I
would tell and they will follow. They be like, what
happened to the So, y'all Airport Bay, Marcus D what's
today July June whatever, twenty twenty five. I'm telling y'all
about Airport Bay. This man could be my husband.
Speaker 2: I'm committed, I'm glued in, I'm not period.
Speaker 1: This may be look okay. So anyways, and I'm saying
this to say it's because she said she felt excited,
and y'all, I bought a new outfit. I have a
date night dress for June eighteenth, for my day with
Airport Bay.
Speaker 2: I'm so excited.
Speaker 1: I hope he never watched Please please never watch this show. Anyways.
If I do, I have no some receipts when I
when I, when I pop out with that rock on
my finger, then we gonna pour the tape. Okay, then
we're gonna pour the receipts after that. Anyways, I'm very
excited for you. I'm glad you're meeting people out in person.
Please let me know what the cream and the coffee
is like, because I'm not that opposed. I just prayed
that my husband as a black man. But at this
point I think we all like fuck it, try something
at this point. Okay, I think at this point we
all open. So let me know how the cream and
the coffee is bab okay if look, okay, I ain't opposed.
She said, she just was adding the wrong man. Okay.
Speaker 2: She sounded excited to Wane the voicemail she did.
Speaker 1: She's something like, yes, yes, I know that's right. Keep
us posted, friend, keep us posted. Okay. Our second voicemail
is if he loved me, he'd protect me. I think
we're gonna play this one.
Speaker 4: Dare to see me and my fiance recently just broke
up because he doesn't protect me. For example, we got
into an argument and he decided to talk behind my
back to his stepfather. His stepfather actually called me, cursing
me out about the things that you know that he
was saying to him. Another example, his mom and his
stepdad pulled up one time with my daughter to basically
confirm me about some things and curse me out. Another
example is that he had a friend that would talk
about me and he would never stand up for me.
My fiance would never stand up for me. He would
just try to sweep out under rug. And because we
have a one year old daughter, you know, a lot
of people say that we should work it out. But
the thing is that, you know, a man protects something
that he loves. That's what I've always been told. So
why would I work out something if he doesn't love me.
He never protects me, he never keep his word with me,
and I'm afraid that if I stay with him, I'm
just showing my daughter that a man could, a man
could basically never protect you. And that's okay, and it's
not okay with me.
Speaker 1: I have many things to say. First of all, you
skipped this man been this man. Okay, you said he's
been sharing personal arguments with the stepfather, who then the
stepfather ended up cursing you out. I want to know
how you let a man put this put a ring
on your finger, and how the fuck you become his
fiance because this man has been this man. You have
seen this behavior before. He didn't just surprisingly pop out
and become this person. You have seen this man before,
and you skipped over it, and you skipped over it,
and you're talking about so you got a one year
old daughter. She questions us, thing, will only teach her
child that a man does. You've already taught your child that. Okay,
you've seen this man before and you skipped over it.
This man didn't just miraculously become this man. Okay, you've
seen a lot of this before, down to letting his
parents and bush her at home. I think I've said
this before when I worked for DCPs DC Public Schools. Okay,
I found out from working with just children that and
these were children from all different walks of life, but
just really kind of most or come from a broken household.
And my job was to give them enrichment programs to
kind of just fluff up their enrichment learning experience. And
what we will say at the end of the day
is that if you follow a crazy kid at home,
a crazy mama is going to open the door. If
you follow a crazy kid at home, a crazy mama
is going to open the door. This man was crazy
because you seeing that his parents, she said, the step
letting his parents and bush her at home.
Speaker 2: I was stuck on my stepdad cussing her out.
Speaker 1: I was like, you've seen this before, okay, and it's honestly,
it's really unfortunate. But you're absolutely right. I see so
many women, and I want you to know that a
healthy I'm looking the camera, A healthy single parent household,
all right, It's far better than a toxic two parent household.
Y'all so stuck on keeping these fucking families together. Okay?
And when I tell you, baby, you would have been
better off taking you and your baby and building yourself
back up, building your self, esteeing your children, seeing you happy,
then staying in a two parent household, and the shit
is toxic. I have friends and family that got a
two parent household. The mom and daddy been sleeping in
different rooms since for twenty years. Twenty years, they've been
sleeping in a different bed. Okay, So the two parent
household shit don't fucking matter. Look we've turned out fine.
I turned out fine. Look my dad was in and out.
I turned Look I turned out just fine. You want
to be the best person that you can be, the
best version of yourself, so you have a full cup
to pour out of the two parent household shit is
a scam, and it's a scam. You better off having
a single parent household with you and your child, building
them up, showing them the right way. Then a two
parent household, and this man got his parents jumping on you, okay,
trust me, trust me. I feel like that's all a scam.
And you got a one year old. Okay, I think
I would just do attempt check on that, you know, hopefully.
I always say, just because he's not a good partner
doesn't mean he can't be a good father. Just because
he's not a good partner, he doesn't that doesn't mean
he can't be a good father. And a lot of
times women are so emotionally invested they don't know how
to separate a man from being a good partner and
being a good parent. You can be a good parent
without being a good partner. He don't want you no more,
he don't want to be with you. But that doesn't
mean that you use this kid to try to you know.
And then all of a sudden, he can be a
good parent without being a good partner. And that's a
tough pill. That's a big, big tough pill for a
lot of women to swallow, because most women feel like
the child comes with the partnership and that's not necessarily true.
So my advice to this week girl is that, first
of all, stay on your own, take your baby, and
do what you need to do. Hopefully he can be
a good cod parent. But that crazy family bred that
crazy man, and you've seen that man before. You just
ignored it. I promise you. I promise you're not surprised.
I didn't even hear it in her voice. And she
was surprised. She seen that man before. She saw that
man before, she saw it in an argument. She saw
when she went through his phone, she saw it went up. Okay, yeah,
she's she's seen that man before.
Speaker 5: And for the stepdad to be condoning that behavior because
I'm I'm sure that's what the cuss I was about.
Speaker 1: You know what this is? This be my issue with
people that brag about the two parent household. When I
meet men and they be like, my parents been married
for twenty five years, and I be like, so the fuck?
What what kind of marriage did they have?
Speaker 2: That's yeah, like that's the real question.
Speaker 1: What did you see? What did you see growing up? Oh?
My parents been together? And I'm just like, well, are
you gonna try to force what you saw with your
parents growing up on me? Because I'm allergic to when
these men be like, oh well, mama, you saw your
mama humping and pumping a lot too. And a lot
of these men have seen their mom working so hard,
and this is why they're so fucking liberal in the household.
They're like, oh, I'll do the laundry, I'll help with
the kids. Yeah, because you saw your mama bringing home
the bacon. And then now you want to be like, well,
why can't we put all our money in one account? No? No, no, no, no, no, no,
hoh the fucking mom. So I'm always skeptical, always skeptical
of these men that be like, I've seen my parents
for twenty they're still together. What kind of marriage did
they have? Yes, okay, that's very very important to be honest,
be honest, tell her truth about it, to your truth,
to rip that ship raw to the bare bones. What
kind of marriage did your your parents have? And you
know what, I always ask a man, what do you
want to keep from your parents for what you saw
from your parents? And what do you want to do
away with? Because oh, that's a very good one. Okay,
what did you see from your parents growing up that
you want to keep and what do you want to
do away with that'll force them to really like what
the hell was really happening in that house? Okay, child, No, ma'am.
I feel like this woman needs to be on her own,
take her child. You know, not married, yeah, not married
married yet?
Speaker 2: Ring look clean?
Speaker 1: Beyonce that that that he was that person as your boyfriend. Unfortunately,
he was that person as your boyfriend. And a lot
of times women think that that the ring is gonna
solidify something else. He was this man and his family
was crazy like that too, as your boyfriend.
Speaker 2: Not the stepdaddy's a lily, I'm sorry, like family and
the mom to Yeah, like he.
Speaker 1: Said, the parents ambushed her at home.
Speaker 2: With the child, right, the child was there.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but also too like you know when you talk
about y'ah, this is this is a crazy clip. Once
upon a time, y'all saw this clip of Meghan Good
and her ex husband Okay, what's his name? Something divon Franklin, right,
and he was on a panel and Meghan, Meghan was
up there and she they both were on the panel,
and the lady and the audience said, Meghan, you're gonna
start covering up now, right, You're gonna start putting on
clothes now, right, Meghan, You're not gonna be out here
with all of this promiscuous club, you know, Devin Franklin
or Devon Franklin. He stepped up and he said, shut
that ship the fuck down. This is what we're not
gonna do. You're not gonna talk about my wife in
this way, okay, because I married her and I have
a covenant under God, and you're not gonna talk. That's
the type of man, okay, that you want. He couldn't
even take a woman saying, Meghan, you need to cover up.
You need to put on more clothes. If you're supposed
to be a wife of a reverend, a pastor, a
man of God, you need to he said, at not
on my watch. I love that. I'm not on my
It's too good.
Speaker 6: Girl.
Speaker 1: Cut her ass off.
Speaker 2: I know she felt like, let me go sit down.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And while you're up in here talking about you need
to be finding you a man that's gonna advocate for you. Okay,
that's what you need to do. You need to be
finding you a man that's gonna advocate for you. And
that level of protection is what this girl clearly is missing. Okay, sweetheart,
leave him in the dust, take through on your child,
let him cold parent. Okay. He ain't got to be
your partner to be a parent. He ain't got to
be your partner to be a parent. Okay, but his
family run. You don't want that for life period. Anyways,
we don't boicement on the suit drink. Oh wow, I
gotta be answered to already. Okay, sorry, oh okay, okay, okay, perfect, okay,
all right, that was up the okay are we listening? Okay?
Speaker 9: Perfect?
Speaker 2: Do you see it?
Speaker 9: I've been dad this guy. Then I met through Facebook
dating app. So we've been on maybe six seven days,
and of course, you know, one thing LEDs to another.
So he's a general contractor, so recently he had to
he was pulled away from one job and sent to
another one. But in between time, the good morning text
went from good morning, beautiful, good morning love to good
morning or GM and then like no communication at all.
Then recently we talked and I'm like, are you cool?
You know?
Speaker 8: Is it me?
Speaker 4: You know?
Speaker 9: Because of course my feelings have gotten involved, and I'm
just trying to figure out, like what to do now.
I'll go to man before he goes to me any day,
and I'll block you as well. So I'm just trying
to see, like he's seeing nothing's going on, just work,
you know. It comes with the territory and like essentially
like sometimes he's gonna be in the city and sometimes
he's not. But I'm like, you need to communicate, like
is it me or like is this nigga like full
of shit?
Speaker 1: He's full of shit. He's lying, he's the sweetheart. He's
lying to you. You said you went on six to
seven days and boom there comes. Then came the intimacy.
Then this nigga switched up. Hello, six to seven dates.
Then came the intimacy. Then this man switched up and
what was more where I found to be more alarming
about what she wrote. She said the good morning text
became GM, ladies. If you go from good morning, beautiful
to good morning to GM to fucking crickets, he doesn't
like you anymore. It's just simple math, okay, And it's
really sad. And when you said that you will block
a man, quick you a block you, le me tell
you how you lost your power. You already asked him,
what's up? You already? When a man okay, when a
man is doing things that you do not like or
you don't you don't like the way that he's moving.
You showed this interest. Okay, you've already told him that
you noticed the switch up. That was your first fucking fumble. Okay,
you know when a man hit me up and he says,
oh my bad, I'm sorry, I haven't reached out in
a while. I said, oh, I didn't even know this.
Fuck you, I didn't even notice. I didn't even notice.
I didn't notice that you didn't reach out to me. Ego,
you call yourself apologizing to me. I didn't, I said, really, well,
and even baby, I didn't even notice. You've already shown
him that you've You've already acknowledged that he hasn't kept
the same behavior. And that's where you went to fuck
left friend. Okay, that that is in general, you've already
acknowledged a bad behavior. I learned this from a saleswoman.
So there was this young girl on Instagram. She had
like millions of followers. Anyway, she was like a multi millionaire,
like twenty six years old, and she said, she said,
when I would go to the car dealerships to buy
my dream cars, it would be like Lamborghinis and bent
Lee's and Maybax and all this type of shit. She said,
when she would be negotiating with the car salesman, when
he would throw out a number that she didn't like,
she literally would fucking ignore him. She would show disinterest
and that he had no choice. The silences is deafening.
He would come back with a with a different number.
And I said, that's gonna work with dating. If a
man throws out some shit that you not interested in,
you showed disinterest, you ignore him until he comes back
with a better fucking offer. And I literally, I said,
she's talking about business, but this can be used in relationships.
And I stand by that if a man is doing
things that you don't like, you on thero you literally
ignore the fuck out of him. You show this interest,
and he will come back with a counter offer. You've
already acknowledged the bad behavior is. It's just me, what's
going on here? That's why you win left the end
of the at the end of the day, It's that
sometimes men don't see the value before you become intimate
with them, and we don't give them enough time and
space to see the value before you become intimate with them.
And this man and it also doesn't allow the woman
to see who this man is before you become intimate
six seven dates.
Speaker 5: You know, in two days. Yeah, But he was like,
it comes with the territory. I know what is relax?
Speaker 2: I know what a jenneral like. It comes with don't
don't play with my girl. Don't do that.
Speaker 1: Must be on Clarence. It comes with the territory. This
is what happens when you make a little fish forel
like a big fish. Come on, not a whole general public.
The women out here in the general public weird suffering
because you made a little fish feel like a big fish.
Speaker 2: Comes with the territory a.
Speaker 5: General contractor excuse me, a g good morning?
Speaker 2: You know what kills me? The HBD. So when she
said GM, I was like, if.
Speaker 1: GM is diabolical.
Speaker 5: The o's and the d's are crazy that you couldn't
write that like the more like it's it's like, oh
it gets me, it gets.
Speaker 1: Under my skin GM. The laziness GM is wild. Now
she has her feelings involved and the communication is fading.
Let it fade, Let it fade. The who reverse is
a real thing. Let it fade. Flit the like a
switch on him. The more you entertain and actually acknowledge
the bad behavior, the more he feels like he got
you in the pocket. You need to live life, need
to look good, do good. You need to literally not
acknowledge anything that he has going on on. Okay, he's
he played you. That's exactly what it is. And when
women say like, oh, when is the when should I
wait to have sex? When should I? You know, the
thing about it is that a man that has good
intentions with you, it's not gonna switch up after you
become intimate with him. That's just really the end of
the end of it of it all. If he actually
is interested and invested in you and is intrigued by
you and cares about you, he's not gonna switch up
after you become intimate. Now I have my own trope
about when is it appropriate, how long you should wait,
and all this kind of stuff, But at the end
of the day, he smashing dash. That's exactly what he wanted.
And you can regain your power by literally just on
a reverse and like let them text, slow down any
communication that he gives, slow down, don't respond to the
good morning, starve him out.
Speaker 5: You know, when you said something on your page one
time about like not giving too much information to men,
like I hope she wasn't like I don't don't have
sex after the until like the third day, like you know,
because like he would have stalled out to the sixth day,
and then you know, we gotta, like women, we gotta
kind of be quieter.
Speaker 1: It's called the black cat theory. Okay. The black cat
theory is just like mysterious thing. Right when you see
a black cat, you kind of like scared a little
bit and it's like, wait a minute, hold on, let
me pray, like lu like what's going on. It's the
black cat theory. You want to literally like bread crumb information,
like literally like some of the guys I'm dating, I
don't even think they know what I do for a living.
And that's you need that type of mystery. Why you
need that type of just like he doesn't know it all,
he doesn't know everything about you. You gotta kind of
bread crumb him and leave him like coming back for more. So, yeah,
you're absolutely right about that. It's called the black cat theory. Okay, y'all.
You want to be this mysterious Okay, it's a mysterious
cat in a wild child and have this man wondering
more about you. You just like your bread crumbing, just
like a dropping a bucket about different information about you,
and it's almost like we'll talk about the next time
I'll see you, like always leave him kind of go ahead,
hands on coming back for more. Okay, period period, that's
that on that anyways, Yeah, girl, that's dead. He got
what he wanted and he's just Sometimes I don't think
women understand that dating is exploratory. I said this all
the time. Dating is exploratory. Sometimes men meet you and
they thought that they may have liked you based on
your physical appearance, they based off of initial conversations, and
then they meet you and it's just like and the
same with women do the same. But the state of
what we have now is that men are making more
choices that they that they don't like the women in
particular that they're dating, and women will accept anybody that
likes them. So I know, it's so sad the moment
that a man is like I'm into you, we just
accept I said, girl, did you screen him? Did you
do you know if you like him back? A lot
of times you don't know if you like him back.
You're just so interested in the one that likes you,
and you have to put them through the same screening
process that they that they put you through, you know,
and that's just that. So anyways, yeah, girl, he smashed
and dash friends. Yeah, and I'm sorry that your emotions
are involved, but that's typical y'all. Anyways, GM is wild,
GM is it is wild.
Speaker 5: No, don't text at that point, Yeah, yeah, I wouldn't responded.
Speaker 1: I lit that script.
Speaker 5: Oh oh don't. I don't want to trouble yourself. Don't
don't trouble yourself to send the text, yow, because the
GM was like, oh god, I gotta right, no, no, no, no, no,
don't worry about it.
Speaker 1: A lot of stuff is really like men to like
prevent you from like crashing out, so they gotta still
send you a little bit so you won't be like,
oh he ghosted me, Say just send you a little
bit and that's even worth y'all. Anyways, this boys went
number two. We on fifty nine minutes. How you feeling,
dre We got something else to talk about?
Speaker 4: No, that's it.
Speaker 1: Episode three in the books,