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Speaker 1: The cheated Juliette extracted from the memoirs of a retired burglar.

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The house in question was what Peter, the scholar who

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corrects my proof sheets, caused one of the Ruonesbury sort,

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the front facing a street, and the back looking over

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a turfed garden with a lime tree or two, a labanum,

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and a lawn tennis court marked out its white lines

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playing to see in the starlight. At the end of

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the garden, a door painted dark green led into a

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narrow lane between high walls, where if two persons met,

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one had to turned sideways to let the other pass.

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The entrance to this lane was cut in two by

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a wooden post about half the height of your hip,

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and just beyond this in the high road, George was

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waiting for us with the dog cart. We had picked

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the usual time, the dinner hour. It had just turned dark,

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and the church clock two streets away was chiming the

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quarter after eight. When Peter and I let ourselves in

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by the green door, I spoke of and felt along

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the wall for the gardener's ladder that we knew was

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hanging there. A simpler job there never was the bedroom

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window we had marked on the first floor stood right

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open to the night air, and inside there was the

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light of a candle or two flickering, just as a

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careless maid will leave them after her mistress has gone

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down to dinner. To be sure there was a chance

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of her coming back to put them out. But we

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could hear her voice going in the servants hall as

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we lifted the ladder and rested it against the sill.

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She's good for half an hour, yet, Peter whispered, holding

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the ladder while I began to climb. But if I

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hear her voice stop, I'll give the signal to be cautious.

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I went up softly, pushed my head gently above the

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level of the seal, and looked in. It was a

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roomy place, with a great half tested bed hung with

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curtains standing out from the wall on my right. The

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curtains were of chintz, a dark background with flaming red

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poppies sprawling over it, and the further curtain hid the

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dressing table and the candles upon it, and the jewel

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case that I confidently hoped to stand upon it. Also,

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her bright Brussels carpet covered the floor and the wallpaper.

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I remember, though, for the life of me, I can't

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tell why was a pale gray ground worked out to

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imitate waded silk with sprigs of gilt honeysuckle upon it.

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I looked round and listened for half a minute. The

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house was still as death up here. Not a sound

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in the room, were in the passages beyond. With a

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nod to Peter to hold the ladder firm, I lifted

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one leg over the sill, then the other. Dropped my

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feet carefully upon the thick carpet, and went quickly round

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the bed to the dressing table. But at the corner,

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and as soon as ever I saw around the chintz curtain,

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my knees gave way, and I put out a hand

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toward the bed post before the dressing table, and in

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front of the big glass in which she could see

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my white face, was an old lady seated. She wore

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a blaze of jewels and a low gown, out of

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which rose the scraggiest neck and shoulders I ever looked upon.

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Her hair was thick with black dye and fastened with

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a diamond star. The powder between the two candles showed

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her cheek bones like flour on a miller's coat, chin

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on hands, she was gazing steadily into the mirror before her,

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and even in my fright, I had time to note

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a glass of sherry and a plate of rice and

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curry stood at her elbow among the rouge pots and

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powder puffs. While I stood stock still and pretty well

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scared out of my wits. She rose, still staring at

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my image in the glass, folded her hands modestly over

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her bosom, and spoke in a deep tragical voice the prince.

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Then facing sharply around, she held out her thin arms.

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You have come at last. There wasn't much to say

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to this except that I had, so, I confessed it.

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Even with the candles behind her, I could see her

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eyes glowing like a dog's and an uglier poor creature

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this world could scarcely show, as the latter set against

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the window. Since you seem to know, ma'am, said I

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it is ah Romeo. Your cheeks are ruddy, your poppies

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are too red. Then I am glad my colors come

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back for to tell the truth, you did give me

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a turn, just at first. You were looking out for me,

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no doubt, my prince. She stretched out her arms again, and,

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being pretty well at my WIT's end and let her

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embrace me. It has been too long, she said, Oh,

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the weary while, and they ill treat me here? Where

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have you been all this tedious time? I wasn't going

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to answer that, you may be sure. It appeared to

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me that twas my right to ask questions rather than

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stand there answering them. If they've been ill treating you,

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ma'am said I, they shall answer for it, my love, Yes, ma'am.

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Would it be taking a liberty if I asked their names?

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There's Gertrude. Gertrude's hash is as good as settled, ma'am.

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I checked off Gertrude on my thumb. That's my niece.

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For a moment I feared I'd been a little too prompt,

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but she went on. And next, there's Henry and the

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children who have more than once made faces at me.

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And Phipson. Phipson's in it too, You know her, don't I.

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It surprised me a trifle to find that Phipson was female.

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Three times to night she pulled my hair and the

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rice she brought me. Look at it, all stuck together

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and sodden. Phipson shall pay for it with her blood,

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My hero, my darling. Don't spare Phibson, she screams bitterly

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if a pin is stuck in her I did, at

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once stick her all over with pins. By this time

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I'd begun to guess what was pretty near the truth

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that I was talking with a mad aunt of the

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family below, and that the game was in my hands

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if I played with decent care. So I brought her

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to face the important question. Look here, I said, All

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this shall be done when you are out of their hands.

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At present, I'm running a considerable risk in braving these

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prosecutors of Yawn, dearest madam, the latters outside, and the

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carriage waiting. Hadn't we better? Elope? At once she gave

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a sob and fell on my arms. Oh is it true?

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Is it true? Pinch me that I may wake? If

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this is but a happy dream? Are you ready this moment?

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There's just one other little thing, ma'am. Your jewels. You

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won't leave them to your enemies. I suppose this was

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the dangerous moment, and I felt a twitch of the

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nerse as I watched her face to see how she

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would take the suggestion. But the poor silly soul turned

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up her eyes to mine, all full of tears and confidence. Dearest,

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I am old, old. Had you come earlier, my beauty

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had not wanted jewels to set it off, But now

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I must wear them to look my best as your bride.

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She hid her face in her hands for a second,

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then turned to the dressing table, lifted her jewel case

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and put it into my hands. I am ready, she repeated.

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Let us be quick and stealthy as death. She followed

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me to the window, and looking out your back, what

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horrible black deaths. It's as easy, said I as pye.

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You could do it on your head. Look here. I

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climbed out first and helped her, setting her feet on

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the wrongs. We went down in silence, I choking with

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laughter all the way at the sight of Peter below,

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who was looking with his mouth open and his lips

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too weak to meet on the curses of wonderment that

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arose from the depths of him. When I touched the

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turf and handed him the jewel case, he took it

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like a man in a trance. We put the latter

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back in its place and stole over the turf together,

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But outside the garden door, Peter could stand no more

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of it. I've a firearm in my pocket, whispered he

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pulling up, and I'm going to fire it off to

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relieve my feelings if you don't explain here and now,

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who in Pity's name is she? You mug? She's the

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original sleeping beauty. I'm eloping with her, and you've got

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her jewels. Pardon me, jem, he says in his gentlemanly way,

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if you don't quite see, are you taking off to

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melt her or marry her? For how to get rid

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of her else? The poor old c reacher had halted too,

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three paces ahead of us, and waited while we whispered

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with the moonlight that slanted down into the lane, whitening

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her bare neck and flashing in her jewels. One moment,

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I said, and stepped forward to her. You had better

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take off those ornaments here, my dear, and give them

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to my servant to take care of. There's a carriage

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waiting for us at the end of the lane, and

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when he has stoved them under the seat, we can

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climb in and drive off to the end of the world,

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to the very rim of it, my hero. She pulled

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the gems from her ears, hair and bosom and handed

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them to Peter, who received them with a bow. Next,

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she searched her pocket and drew out a tiny key.

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Peter unlocked the case, and, having carefully stowed the diamonds inside,

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locked it again. Handed back the key, touched his hat,

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and walked off towards the dog cart. My dearest lady,

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I began as soon as we were alone between the

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high walls. It's a devotion of a life. Her bare

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arm crept into mind. There is a little time left

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for us in which to be happy. Year after year,

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I have marked off the almanac day by day, I

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have watched the dial. I saw my sisters married, and

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my sister's daughters, and still I waited. Each had a

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man to love her and tend her. But none had

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such a man as I would have chosen. There were

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none like you, my prince. No I dare say not. Oh,

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but my heart is not so old. Take my hand,

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it is firm and strong. Touch my lips they up burning.

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A low whistle sounded at the top of the lane.

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As I took her hands, I pushed her back, and

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turning ran for my life. I suppose that as I ran,

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I counted forty before her scream came, and then the

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sound of her feet pelt, and then the sound of

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her feet pattering after me. She must have run like

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a demon, for I was less than ten yards ahead

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when pe To caught my wrist and pulled me up

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on to the back seat of the dog cart. And

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before George could set the horse going, her hand clutched

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at the flap on which my feet rested. It missd

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its grasp, and she never got near enough again. But

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for half a minute I looked into that horrible face,

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following us and working with silent rage, And for half

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a mile at least I heard the patter of her

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feet in the darkness behind. Indeed, I can hear it now.

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End of I cheated Juliette by Que