Speaker 1: Writing an essay about Showgirls for my Patreon this month.
Speaker 1: I'm like, so, now I'm just a titty brained and
Speaker 1: uh yeah, you know how it is. So we're gonna
Speaker 1: try to pull it out. We're gonna try to pull
Speaker 1: it out of the bag. We're gonna think about my
Speaker 1: actual job. That's what's up, man, She's thinking about knobs
Speaker 1: and cum jokes. What can I say?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, the greatest stripper ever, the Lebron James is
Speaker 2: so true. When this woman strips, she like nothing. There's
Speaker 2: nothing else in history can compare it to seeing this
Speaker 2: woman take her clothes off and you know, good for her.
Speaker 1: It's true. Yeah, It's like, I think the conceit of
Speaker 1: Showgirls that you have to you have to become comfortable
Speaker 1: with is you just have to accept that, know me
Speaker 1: is the hottest woman on the planet. You just need
Speaker 1: to like there is you can't look, there's.
Speaker 2: No you can't be influenced by the fact that you
Speaker 2: saw her unsaved by the bell three morning for like
Speaker 2: seven years now, and you can't, you know, mix that
Speaker 2: up with the weird feelings you have because you're like,
Speaker 2: wait a minute, I was a Tiffany Amber. I was
Speaker 2: Tiffany Amberthees, and then Lark Vorhees and then Jesse. No
Speaker 2: offense to Jesse. Wow, my ranking as a kid owned.
Speaker 1: This is a great offense to tall girls everywhere. But
Speaker 1: also I think that's the standard ranking.
Speaker 2: You know, listen, it wasn't.
Speaker 1: Well look, I had to tell you. It's interesting because
Speaker 1: in nineteen ninety five, beauty standards are really different. So
Speaker 1: for example, like you know, shout out to my girl
Speaker 1: Elizabeth Berkley Loren. She married one of the Lorentz family,
Speaker 1: so you know, but like she just really doesn't have
Speaker 1: an ass.
Speaker 2: No, you weren't allowed back then, but you weren't allowed
Speaker 2: to It's true if you had an ass, if a
Speaker 2: woman had an ass, they would.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they would they you would go to jail.
Speaker 2: You Like, it is so funny that like that, like
Speaker 2: big asses were not like a like a uh conventional
Speaker 2: attractive thing like in in like the broader concept of
Speaker 2: like cultural history until like a lot really.
Speaker 1: It's really is like, yeah, it's truly truly, Seattle really
Speaker 1: did a solid for everyone on that.
Speaker 2: A thing, a thing where a lot of people were like,
Speaker 2: wait a minute, I really do like an ass a
Speaker 2: big ass. Wait a minute, why are there no big
Speaker 2: asses anywhere?
Speaker 1: Wait? Okay, so there is one really good ass in Showgirls,
Speaker 1: you know because of my my extensive viewing of this,
Speaker 1: and that ass belongs to Rina Riffle, who plays the
Speaker 1: the stripper whose name is Penny, who James eventually knocks up,
Speaker 1: and Penny has an incredible ass and fun fact, Rina
Speaker 1: Riffle was in both the show Girls and strip teas
Speaker 1: in nineteen ninety five. Big year for Rena Riffle.
Speaker 2: Good for her.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that's how good that ass was. That's how
Speaker 1: good that ass was.
Speaker 2: Somebody didn't like that. That was the coming out party
Speaker 2: for the ass that. You know. Another thing we can think.
Speaker 1: A lot of shots are framed just to get Rina
Speaker 1: riffles ass in that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and another thing we could thank Paul Verhoven for.
Speaker 1: You know what, It's such a good movie. Dog Like,
Speaker 1: I'll be thinking about it all the time, so.
Speaker 2: I know, I know you do love it. I gotta yeah,
Speaker 2: it's been a long time since I've seen it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, I don't think that there's anything wrong
Speaker 1: with that either, but you know, it's just.
Speaker 2: I mean, it just didn't it didn't appeal to me
Speaker 2: the same way that the other Verehoven did in my mind.
Speaker 2: I mean, don't get me wrong, I was like, damn,
Speaker 2: these are so nice titties and all that, but you know,
Speaker 2: it just didn't it didn't speak to my myopic male
Speaker 2: child brain the way that you know, big blow up, violence,
Speaker 2: explosion or yeah, cop, did.
Speaker 1: You know that's the thing. I think that you were
Speaker 1: too free of the form of americanness that Paul Verhobbn
Speaker 1: was expressly attempting to critique with Show Girls.
Speaker 2: I would argue, well, yeah at the time, because I
Speaker 2: was just like, hey, titties, that's nice.
Speaker 1: Yeah, nice, nice?
Speaker 2: Cool?
Speaker 1: Hey what what hey?
Speaker 2: Hey wait a minute, this is confused, Like yeah, I
Speaker 2: mean like, yeah.
Speaker 1: I know it's a confusing movie. What it's all that?
Speaker 1: But do you like them?
Speaker 2: Why? Why did Like it's like just like wait a minute,
Speaker 2: what are they talking? Like? Why do they keep talking about?
Speaker 1: What? Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what watching that is like. A twelve year
Speaker 2: old was like, wait, no.
Speaker 1: That's what watching that is like. That's what watching that
Speaker 1: is like. And that's the point of it. I you know,
Speaker 1: I argue, but you know what, it's a really good
Speaker 1: for hobe that I rewatched recently is total recall. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: fucking whips. I like how there's the chick with the
Speaker 1: three titties.
Speaker 2: I like the exploding heads.
Speaker 1: It's I got a question.
Speaker 2: The stomach guy, whatever his name is, I forget.
Speaker 1: Now, where do you come down on in terms of
Speaker 1: Total Recall? Do you think that he actually went to
Speaker 1: Mars or do you think that it is the package
Speaker 1: he paid for? Uh? Because I think that he that
Speaker 1: it's all in his head and Blair thinks that it's real,
Speaker 1: and I think that that's.
Speaker 2: Just what I've always I've always thought it was. I
Speaker 2: think I've always thought it was real, but just because
Speaker 2: that's how you know it's presented, And like when I
Speaker 2: was younger, I didn't think about it. I mean, no,
Speaker 2: I can see I could see it being a thing
Speaker 2: in his head, and I could see that, and I
Speaker 2: mean I could see that being like an interesting part
Speaker 2: of the critique too, like on top of everything else.
Speaker 2: So I could definitely see that. I guess I don't.
Speaker 2: I guess it's not one to me because like I
Speaker 2: liked Total Recall, but like that wasn't like that wasn't
Speaker 2: one of the eighties movies.
Speaker 1: That like absolutely that was really cool.
Speaker 2: Grabbed me, mostly because I didn't see it until I
Speaker 2: was like a little bit older. Yeah, for sure, Like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I was one of those Oh no, I remember. I
Speaker 2: didn't like it at first because they would show it
Speaker 2: on TV and it made no goddamn sense, like all
Speaker 2: the yeah everything, and like it was just like and
Speaker 2: I'm like, what the fuck is like what does this mean?
Speaker 2: And then it's like an older you know, I watched
Speaker 2: it and I was like, oh, okay, cool, Oh I
Speaker 2: get it, like I see what you're doing here, but like, yeah,
Speaker 2: it didn't it didn't really work well on TVs.
Speaker 1: I think the first one that I saw was actually
Speaker 1: show Girls, because it's like we didn't I didn't see
Speaker 1: a RoboCop until I was a lot older, and I
Speaker 1: think I I think I saw show Girls before I
Speaker 1: saw Starship Troopers, but I can't be certain of the order.
Speaker 1: I might have seen Starship Troopers first.
Speaker 2: I'm not sure I saw RoboCop first.
Speaker 1: Yeah, hell yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah. That was one of those things where my dad
Speaker 2: was like, oh, yeah, you can watch that. That's fine,
Speaker 2: your eight whatever.
Speaker 1: Watching watch that guy get shot in the dick.
Speaker 2: Watch the guy get shot in the in the dick.
Speaker 2: Watch like, uh, do get pulled. What the fuck is
Speaker 2: his name? Read? Uh the dad from that seventies show.
Speaker 1: Fuck?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, bad guy. Uh yeah, like watching that guy
Speaker 2: just get torn up. It's just fantastic, folks, It's great. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and then Starship Troopers and then Total Recall, and then
Speaker 2: it was like, oh, okay.
Speaker 1: I saw I haven't seen Basic Instinct. I probably should.
Speaker 2: Oh you would like I think you would like Basic Instinct.
Speaker 2: It's uh, it's like, yeah, that was one of those
Speaker 2: where I watched it and I was like, oh, this
Speaker 2: is like sexual politics thing. Yeah, I'm tuning out for.
Speaker 1: All Yeah yeah fourteen like you know, oh yeah, like
Speaker 1: damn much to ponder.
Speaker 2: Much consider anyway? Uh about Sharon Stone's uh bodacious Tatars.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right, that's so true.
Speaker 2: It's like a lot I think that. I think that's
Speaker 2: what people would have said back then.
Speaker 1: They should anyway we could, we should bring back saying
Speaker 1: bodacious tatars.
Speaker 2: Just getting beaten, beaten with pipes in the street, like
Speaker 2: kick god, what is wrong?
Speaker 1: Welcome back to her not so different show about bodacious tatars.
Speaker 1: About have always beenous.
Speaker 2: About giant bodacious tatars throughout history? You know who had
Speaker 2: the biggest tits in the medieval era we today, we
Speaker 2: debate for forty five minutes.
Speaker 1: Well, I guess that was a really sad thing, is
Speaker 1: that they don't like big.
Speaker 2: They don't know they were, Like where's the demure noble.
Speaker 1: Sauceless sauceless era, you know, and like, hey, shout out
Speaker 1: to the small tits too. We love to see them all. Okay,
Speaker 1: equal opportunity. But I don't know, we got to call
Speaker 1: them something other than bardaceous. I think bordacious, does not.
Speaker 2: You know what, they're all ladies. They're all bodacious to me.
Speaker 1: That's and that's called feminist.
Speaker 2: As an ally as as a feminist, I can say
Speaker 2: they're all They're all. They're allus in my heart, I'm
Speaker 2: very brave.
Speaker 1: Hashtag ally hashtags.
Speaker 2: Ally hashtag sex positive, hashtag me hashtag I'm I'm a
Speaker 2: good boy. Oh god, Okay. One of those things is like, yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm not. I'm definitely not making any common it's about that.
Speaker 2: That's uh, yeah, that's gonna that's gonna be all you.
Speaker 2: I'm not on the individual bodaciousness.
Speaker 1: Of Yeah, I mean, ladies and gentle days if you want,
Speaker 1: you know. Comments on titties write and say eleanor what
Speaker 1: about this? You know what I'm probably gonna say, thanks, thanks,
Speaker 1: great great child.
Speaker 2: What are you doing? I'm just sending nudes to my
Speaker 2: favorite pocket Like wait what like damn?
Speaker 1: That's sweet? Right, that's yeah, thanks for thinking of us.
Speaker 1: That's good. I gotta stop watching.
Speaker 2: Ask ask guy coming in like, whoa, that's great. Have
Speaker 2: you guys get any pictures of them from the back? Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Oh man, all right, well that's the and caboose ass
Speaker 2: slash Paul Verhoven chat.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I guess we should talk about other things.
Speaker 1: Yeah, let's do our job. I guess all right.
Speaker 2: Here Yeah, hello, welcome back to We're Not So Different,
Speaker 2: a podcast about how asses have always been underrated. My
Speaker 2: name is Luke and I'm an amateurish medievalist, and as
Speaker 2: always i'm joined dactor eleanor Yanniga who is anything. But
Speaker 2: today we are talking more about on de Luce. But
Speaker 2: before we get there, we get a couple questions first
Speaker 2: from our patron, Alie Cant, who says, so, what exactly
Speaker 2: are the differences between a count, a viscount, an earl,
Speaker 2: and a mark a marquess in similar nobleman roles with
Speaker 2: funny names.
Speaker 1: Okay, So I can tell you from the English point
Speaker 1: of view that here's how it goes. So the number,
Speaker 1: the biggest one is duke, okay, okay, So duke is
Speaker 1: most important and duke you know, this like comes back
Speaker 1: from this is like a Norman thing because William the
Speaker 1: Conqueror was the Duke of Normandy, right, But they don't
Speaker 1: start doing dukedoms in England until the fourteenth century. But
Speaker 1: the dukedoms can be conferred on you, like that's a
Speaker 1: thing that you certainly can do. But ordinarily what happens
Speaker 1: with dukedoms is that's what's given to you if you
Speaker 1: are like a prince of royal blood when you get majority, right,
Speaker 1: So it's like if you're the third prince or whatever,
Speaker 1: you're not going to get to be the king, so
Speaker 1: you end up being a duke. Right underneath that is marquess,
Speaker 1: which is fun So that is also Norman. It comes
Speaker 1: from the term marchio and it's like that is people
Speaker 1: who were very specifically in the marches, so like the
Speaker 1: Marches of Wales and things like that, So you know,
Speaker 1: like basically the people that they had on the edges
Speaker 1: to like watch the Welsh marches or to watch the
Speaker 1: Scottish marches, so that's that's where it comes from. Then
Speaker 1: you get your earls, okay, which is interesting to me
Speaker 1: because I thought that earls were going to be higher
Speaker 1: than Marquis's but shows what I know. I guess that
Speaker 1: I'm just more used to seeing earls, and it's because
Speaker 1: earl is a really old name here, because we get
Speaker 1: that from the Danish, right, because that was yarl and
Speaker 1: they they are like the people who kind of like
Speaker 1: administer particular provinces for the kings, right, So that that's
Speaker 1: what you get. Next, Then you get your viscount okay,
Speaker 1: your viscountscount, yeah, exactly. And interestingly it was first introduced
Speaker 1: in the Hre in the tenth century and it was
Speaker 1: a vice kommes, right, so it's like basically like underneath
Speaker 1: the account or something like that. So like, but we
Speaker 1: don't apparently have counts here in England, so I think
Speaker 1: that basically counts are the equivalent of earls on the
Speaker 1: count net but on the continent, but they don't have
Speaker 1: earls because they weren't taken over by the Danish, right,
Speaker 1: So you have a count and said and then you
Speaker 1: have a viscount, right, and so we have these from
Speaker 1: like the one hundred Years War mm hm. And so
Speaker 1: that is a it's an attempt to consolidate French names
Speaker 1: into like the English one because they're like, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: well we're going to rule Frants, then we're gonna have
Speaker 1: to have a way to amalgamate all these guys, right.
Speaker 2: Fun fact, Earl famously became a name. Another fun fact.
Speaker 2: Every time I see Marquis, I want to say Marquise,
Speaker 2: but yeah, it did became a name. You throw a
Speaker 2: knee on the end of that bad boy, and it's Marquise,
Speaker 2: you know. And of course count became a name, Count Dooku.
Speaker 1: That's right, Yeah, yeah, that was shit.
Speaker 2: Is better than a joke about burgers being hamburger chefs.
Speaker 2: I love that they didn't have hamburgers back then. God
Speaker 2: damn it. They weren't civilized like us.
Speaker 1: No, that's a way that they had to wait around
Speaker 1: for Mongols to invents grinding meat.
Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, and then for the Americans to perfect it,
Speaker 2: because you can't allow for such a thing. No yeah, wait,
Speaker 2: hold on, oh I'm sorry, go ahead, got one.
Speaker 1: More under viscount you get Baron I forgot about Baron.
Speaker 2: Yeah, another name.
Speaker 1: My friends in high school had a Springer Spaniel named Baron,
Speaker 1: so to me, it is always a dog. And like
Speaker 1: we have the most barons around the shop. There's tons
Speaker 1: of fucking barons left. There's like four hundred barons, which
Speaker 1: so it's like pretty common. Uh you know, it's like
Speaker 1: as common as a noble could be, I suppose, So yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, basically they are like it essentially meant that
Speaker 1: you held land, so it's like, you know whatever. So yeah,
Speaker 1: then then and then you got just like your serves
Speaker 1: and esquires and ship below that. It's not that interesting,
Speaker 1: but yeah, that's so that's everybody.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah mech then squire was the title of nobility,
Speaker 2: not the title that you get. Called me your an
Speaker 2: attorney and nothing else. Uh yeah, Ollie, thank you very
Speaker 2: much for the question. Uh. Next, we got one from
Speaker 2: cat Solis, who says, question about medieval executions generally, were
Speaker 2: there any factors that determine the weapons used for beheadings
Speaker 2: other than the executioner's preference. Thinking about Margaret Pole's hack
Speaker 2: job sorry via acts versus Ambolin's French swordsman executioner, I
Speaker 2: saw some Wolfall talk online about English beheadings traditionally involving
Speaker 2: an axe and block, while the French just had the
Speaker 2: person kneel, but no sources, so I'm curious.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean the major way that people got executed
Speaker 1: was hanging rather a lot of hanging around the joint.
Speaker 1: But as you kind of move up in society, you
Speaker 1: get more of the beheadings because they're faster, right, and
Speaker 1: oftentimes for nobles and people like that, they want to
Speaker 1: have it be a little bit less of a spectacle,
Speaker 1: like enough of a spectacle where some people are allowed in,
Speaker 1: but they don't want like the baying mobs of hundreds
Speaker 1: of people coming in to watch nobles getting killed, because
Speaker 1: it's just all a bit unseemly, you know, Anablin gets
Speaker 1: the French swordsman because they're like trying to be nice,
Speaker 1: you know, because Henry he's such a nice guy.
Speaker 2: So we're always saying that, yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, completely absolutely, And then like I think that it
Speaker 1: does tend to be more common that English people do
Speaker 1: use a block, yes, but I don't really know that
Speaker 1: much more about Like I know more about English executions
Speaker 1: just because of where I live than I do about
Speaker 1: French ones. I do know that we get rather a
Speaker 1: lot of axes in the Holy Roman Empire, and but
Speaker 1: that tends to kind of like be I think.
Speaker 2: That they're generally kneeling.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, but then sometimes there's no real rhyme or
Speaker 1: reason to it. But there's also just a lot of
Speaker 1: hanging around the shop like more common people. It's hanging.
Speaker 1: So that's how we we tend to know about it.
Speaker 1: But yeah, it's it's all pretty grim. Hilariously, I was
Speaker 1: just chatting to a friend of mine and she's she's
Speaker 1: another public historian and she works on amble In and
Speaker 1: apparently she was at a history festival last year and
Speaker 1: there was this man in the crowd who like came
Speaker 1: to argue with her about that, like, well, what was
Speaker 1: Henry the supposed to do?
Speaker 2: He was like, I mean what was he supposed to do? Not? Fuck?
Speaker 2: Is not fucking a woman? I didn't want to fuck
Speaker 2: him unless she was married? I mean, what what?
Speaker 1: What do you not kill her?
Speaker 2: Oh? You're you're applying you're applying these modern standards to
Speaker 2: a medieval man who didn't know anything about it. Well, like,
Speaker 2: there was some large coalition of groups of people across
Speaker 2: the continent who were like, no, Henry, don't do this. Yeah, right,
Speaker 2: come on there, sure, yeah, And I'm supposed to believe
Speaker 2: and I'm supposed to believe that people care when a
Speaker 2: woman died in the early modern period.
Speaker 1: Sure, yeah, anyway that makes me laugh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did have a non uh stupid question. Well,
Speaker 2: at least from my perspective. I mean, I realized that
Speaker 2: that hanging does take a bit and you got to
Speaker 2: kick and stuff. But I'm also led to believe that
Speaker 2: having your fucking head chopped off, uh, is not something
Speaker 2: that can usually be accomplished in a single swing odd
Speaker 2: circumstances are by very strong people with a very large blade.
Speaker 2: Because one of the things I've found out from reading
Speaker 2: about actual executions like this is that even the best
Speaker 2: of these guys were like two to three swing minimum. Like,
Speaker 2: there's a lot of shit you got to get through
Speaker 2: in the human neck to get it off.
Speaker 1: It's not, yeah, it's not. It isn't kind of like
Speaker 1: a one and done deal, which is which was why
Speaker 1: they have this like special swordsman Bramble and right. You know,
Speaker 1: it's the equivalent of like having a really good second
Speaker 1: if you you know, shame yourself in front of your domaio.
Speaker 2: Right, yeah, yeah, it's part in uh got part in
Speaker 2: the Showgun where they where they're talking about the time
Speaker 2: where young.
Speaker 1: Like you guy getting the eight year olds of eight
Speaker 1: year old to.
Speaker 2: Like to chop your head off because he defeated you
Speaker 2: in battle or whatever, and in the memory of it
Speaker 2: he does it in one swoop. But then when they're
Speaker 2: talking about it much later, he like, what did I
Speaker 2: have to hit him like twelve fucking times to get
Speaker 2: his head off?
Speaker 1: Like you idiot? Like who would ask you?
Speaker 2: Who would ask a twelve year old to do this?
Speaker 2: You moron? You ube? Yeah yeah yeah. Medieval executions actually
Speaker 2: executions of any era.
Speaker 1: Not not great main Yah, yeah, it's to be honest.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: The guillotine was a huge step forward.
Speaker 2: Yeah, people people make a big deal about it now,
Speaker 2: huge step forward. Uh. But yeah, basically, if you're going
Speaker 2: to execute people for like actual reasons, like you know,
Speaker 2: revolutionary justice type stuff, just make it swift, no torture.
Speaker 2: Don't people like this for the love? Oh yeah, you know.
Speaker 1: People, people make a big people make a big deal
Speaker 1: about the guillotine now because they're like, oh, rich people
Speaker 1: got killed and that's what it's about.
Speaker 2: You know, hey, how yeah, when it's actually when it's
Speaker 2: actually an ingenious use of human engineering. This, it really
Speaker 2: is was really intended to solve a lot of problems
Speaker 2: and you know, just happened dead for an unintended reason,
Speaker 2: kind of like the cotton gin Eli Whitney Woo. Nobody's
Speaker 2: gonna need slaves after.
Speaker 1: I invent this?
Speaker 2: Hell, oh god, this is awful. Yeah, Kat, thank you
Speaker 2: very much for the question question you want to answer.
Speaker 2: If you want to ask questions like these that we
Speaker 2: are forced at Halbert point to answer on the show,
Speaker 2: then please do subscribe to our Patreon, Patreon dot com,
Speaker 2: slash w n sd pod where you can ask us
Speaker 2: these questions. You can join our discord, which has now
Speaker 2: more than three hundred members, not three hundred active members,
Speaker 2: but more than three hundred members regardless. And uh yeah,
Speaker 2: and you can also listen to bonus episodes. We just
Speaker 2: released our first one on and Or season two last week,
Speaker 2: and later this week we will get to part four
Speaker 2: of Giovanni Boccaccio's The Cameron. Uh and it will get
Speaker 2: even raunchier.
Speaker 1: Your hats, because.
Speaker 2: Onto your hats, folks, because you get to find out
Speaker 2: what what was considered extremely pornographic.
Speaker 1: Too of the fourteenth century.
Speaker 2: And you're gonna be like, well, I mean that was that.
Speaker 2: That was definitely like a fun story, but really that
Speaker 2: was it. Huh okay, cool, So it really was like,
Speaker 2: oh they showed me an ankle. Yeah, you know, folks,
Speaker 2: it was a different time. It was a different, different time.
Speaker 2: But regardless, we will take you back to the different
Speaker 2: time and uh the ravings of a guy uh watching
Speaker 2: the world end uh during the Black Deaths. So yeah,
Speaker 2: he's just like us for real, for real anyway, Yeah,
Speaker 2: subscribe to that patroon dot com slash w nsd pod
Speaker 2: five bucks a month. You guys know the deal. Anyway,
Speaker 2: as much as we would like to avoid defining all
Speaker 2: Ontolus by its relationship to the rest of so called
Speaker 2: Christian Europe, it becomes far more difficult as time moves on,
Speaker 2: especially since we all know eventually where this leads. Indeed,
Speaker 2: from the outset in seven eleven until about ten sixty three,
Speaker 2: there was nothing that could be remotely considered a united
Speaker 2: Christian response to the Muslim presence in Iberia. To be sure,
Speaker 2: leaders who happened to be Christians conquered parts of northern
Speaker 2: and northeastern Spain and northern Portugal, carving out their own
Speaker 2: lands and kingdoms, but aside from being Catholic Christians, they
Speaker 2: shared little in the way of common culture or even
Speaker 2: love for one another. Herona, Barcelona, leon Oporto, and Zamora
Speaker 2: were all taken by Christian rulers before the end of
Speaker 2: the ninth century, but that's where it stopped. For nearly
Speaker 2: two hundred years. The kingdoms of Leon, castill, Navarre, and Arrogant,
Speaker 2: as well as the County of Barcelona all formed, but
Speaker 2: they fought with each other just as often, if not
Speaker 2: more so, than they with the Muslims to their south.
Speaker 2: Even through the early eleventh century, when the Umid state
Speaker 2: of Cordoba completely unraveled and broke into more than twenty
Speaker 2: competing typhus or independent Iberian Muslim states, there was no
Speaker 2: concerted effort to push Islam out of Iberia, and they
Speaker 2: weren't able to extend their holdings further. But all that
Speaker 2: began to change in ten sixty three as Pope Alexander
Speaker 2: the Second had a wild and crazy idea. What if
Speaker 2: the secular military leadership of Christian Europe, meaning Western Europe
Speaker 2: in this case, called their levies to form a multinational
Speaker 2: Catholic coalition to go in eject Muslims from the land
Speaker 2: and then occupy it so it could be brought back
Speaker 2: into the loving bosom of Christendom. And what if follow
Speaker 2: me here? All warriors were given a plenary indulgence, granting
Speaker 2: them remissions of remission of sins if they participated a
Speaker 2: teaching formalized within a decade by Bishop Anselm of Luca.
Speaker 2: In ten sixty three, Alexander the Second did just that, unofficially,
Speaker 2: preaching a limited war to remove the Muslims from their
Speaker 2: rule in the city of Barbastro, which he referred to
Speaker 2: as quote a Christian emergency end quote. It was not
Speaker 2: a true crusade, at least not by the standard set
Speaker 2: three decades later that would be employed for another four
Speaker 2: hundred years thereafter, but it was a direct precursor to
Speaker 2: those later. It be seen as a dry run for
Speaker 2: the wider crusading practice, a proof of concept for the
Speaker 2: popes that it could work. But that was all hindsight.
Speaker 2: When a mixed force composed of Normans under William of Aquitaine,
Speaker 2: alongside Ragonese and Catalan soldiers besieged Barbastro in ten sixty
Speaker 2: three and took it less than a year later. They
Speaker 2: had no idea the horrifying precedent they were setting, though
Speaker 2: in something of an ironic joke, the siege and capture
Speaker 2: of Barbastro would be a brief Christian victory that was
Speaker 2: reversed in short order by ten sixty five Muslim forces
Speaker 2: from the Taipha of Zaragoza, along with a contingent at
Speaker 2: five hundred Savillan Christian cavalry, successfully reclaimed to Barbastro, leaving
Speaker 2: Christian forces in disarray and great enmity between the Spanish
Speaker 2: forces and the Franks for what was deemed quote Norman barbarity,
Speaker 2: much like the real Crusades would inspired later More importantly
Speaker 2: to this series, however, the Siege of Barbastro was the
Speaker 2: first real United attempt by something that vaguely can be
Speaker 2: called Christendom to eject Muslims and Islam from the Iberian Peninsula.
Speaker 2: It was not the nationalist notion of a reconquest with
Speaker 2: all the fascist baggage that entails, but Christian opposition to
Speaker 2: Iberian Muslims was fomenting into a real cohesive project at
Speaker 2: the time, and that's going to be an existential problem
Speaker 2: for the leaders of all Idolus going forward. So ye,
Speaker 2: as we said part three of our series on all Ondoluce,
Speaker 2: and today we're talking about how these disparate, feuding statelets
Speaker 2: began to coalesce into a force that would one day
Speaker 2: fully eject Muslim rule from the Iberian Peninsula, especially the
Speaker 2: end of the Umid state of Cordoba and the Typhi period. However,
Speaker 2: we don't want to fully focus on Christianity this time,
Speaker 2: especially since it's going to be such a big, big
Speaker 2: problem next time when we close this out. So we're
Speaker 2: also going to talk about some of the lasting cultural
Speaker 2: and cultural, spiritual, political, and scientific legacies of the peoples
Speaker 2: of al Andolous during the time of Muslim rule. There's
Speaker 2: a whole golden age specifically associated with al Andolous after all,
Speaker 2: and we can't forget that. Also, we got to talk
Speaker 2: about el Seed. You know, he's there. We can't we
Speaker 2: can't forget about.
Speaker 1: That's our boy though, about Seed.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Eleanor. We talked last time about how we
Speaker 2: don't subscribe to the Christian nationalist idea of a reconquista,
Speaker 2: but that certainly seems to start changing in the eleventh century.
Speaker 2: How are we to delineate between the ahistorical fascist narrative
Speaker 2: and the actual events that happened.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that this is one of the real
Speaker 1: times when actually looking at the history shows you that
Speaker 1: the history with the big age that people tell you
Speaker 1: isn't real, right, because all you have to do is
Speaker 1: look at how these various kingdoms relate to each other
Speaker 1: and how they make varying alliances whose lands they're taking.
Speaker 1: And you know you've already touched on this point. But
Speaker 1: the Christian kingdoms of the Iberian Peninsula spend just as
Speaker 1: much time at each other's throats as they do fighting
Speaker 1: with anybody who is Muslim. And this isn't to say
Speaker 1: that they don't fight people who are Muslim. And it
Speaker 1: isn't to say also that when they do fight people
Speaker 1: who are Muslim, they aren't going. Yeah, like, this one's
Speaker 1: from my boy jac shout out to God. He's definitely
Speaker 1: going to help us win this one. But we have
Speaker 1: careers like you know of our boil Seed that show
Speaker 1: us that you know, this idea that there is a
Speaker 1: fundamental disconnect between Muslims and Christians and that they are
Speaker 1: always at each other's throats. Like that's thoroughly modern. You
Speaker 1: have people who are just soldiers of fortune who move
Speaker 1: back and forth all the time. It's completely possible for
Speaker 1: you to be a client of a Muslim ruler when
Speaker 1: you are a noble who is Christian and vice versa.
Speaker 1: You know, there are all different ways of doing this
Speaker 1: on the peninsula, and they end up just being a
Speaker 1: kind of more interesting bunch of smaller kingdoms than what
Speaker 1: is going on in the rest of euro because it's
Speaker 1: just like the rest of Europ where everyone's kicking each
Speaker 1: other's teeth in all the fucking time, right, you know,
Speaker 1: Like it's it's possible to see various parts of the
Speaker 1: Holy Roman Empire at each other's throats and like going
Speaker 1: for each other, you know, Dear God, Like you know,
Speaker 1: England is constantly having, you know, an anarchy or something
Speaker 1: like that and fighting each other, and it's the same
Speaker 1: thing that's happening down on the Iberian Peninsula. But you
Speaker 1: can have this veneer on top of it, right. I
Speaker 1: suppose what it ends up doing, interestingly, is it ends
Speaker 1: up getting people from outside the area more involved the
Speaker 1: people inside, and people outside the area are like, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: this is just like a crusade, and everyone like from
Speaker 1: Barcelona's like, what, no, it's not.
Speaker 2: The Aragonese told us, we like, we needed to do
Speaker 2: this so they wouldn't try to take the border territories
Speaker 2: between us and you know whatever, and they were like yeah,
Speaker 2: and then and then it was real. They were like wait,
Speaker 2: why like wait, why are these Normans doing this? Why
Speaker 2: are they killing everyone like this? Why are they not
Speaker 2: really making distinctions between like the Muslims there and anyone else?
Speaker 2: Oh god, why are you doing that?
Speaker 1: You know?
Speaker 2: And I'm not, obviously not to say that Aragonese and
Speaker 2: Catalan men didn't participate in those things too, but it
Speaker 2: seems to be a distinct problem from after this that
Speaker 2: lingered on for a good while. They didn't really like
Speaker 2: the French.
Speaker 1: Now, that's the thing. It's like, if you've got to
Speaker 1: choose between your neighbors who, yeah, like you fight with
Speaker 1: them all the time or whatever, but culturally you have
Speaker 1: a lot of similarities, and you know, these fucking French,
Speaker 1: like the French Vikings are in your backyard, you know,
Speaker 1: then you're most of the time going to fall down
Speaker 1: on the side of your neighbors.
Speaker 2: Then, yeah, you know, what.
Speaker 1: It is seen is more foreign threat because one ament
Speaker 1: only it is more foreign right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it's you know, we all know
Speaker 2: there's leads to fourteen ninety two, the removal of the
Speaker 2: last Muslim stronghold from Granada in the very southern tip
Speaker 2: of Spain. But you know, we can't lump all of
Speaker 2: that together because not only were the people of all
Speaker 2: andelusiks speriencing different things at the time, at these times,
Speaker 2: the leadership was going through different things, and you know,
Speaker 2: there was a push and pull. It wasn't all just
Speaker 2: the Christians pushing south relentlessly for four hundred years. It
Speaker 2: was you pushed a little and you got somewhere, and okay,
Speaker 2: we took back part of Extremadura, and everyone's like, yeah,
Speaker 2: there's a reason no one really cares that you did that.
Speaker 2: I call it dura and not place we like to live.
Speaker 2: I realized it's not I really don't. I know, I
Speaker 2: understand Spanish, just not like that. Don't don't message me
Speaker 2: listen now, you know, So yeah, you just can't. You
Speaker 2: can't lump all these things together because it's, uh, you know,
Speaker 2: it's not the same thing. The uh, the as we'll
Speaker 2: talk about later. The Uh al Moravid dynasty treats not
Speaker 2: only most of their Muslim constituents, but they're Jewish and
Speaker 2: Christian and constituents far differently than the Umid state of
Speaker 2: Cordoba did, which you know, is just it's a different thing.
Speaker 2: But yeah, so at this time, at about the early
Speaker 2: early one thousands or so, around one thousand and thirty
Speaker 2: was the very end, but the Umid state of Cordoba
Speaker 2: began to just fall apart. The wider Umids had hung around.
Speaker 2: The last Umid caliph would die in ten thirty one.
Speaker 2: But yeah, the Umid state just couldn't hold it together,
Speaker 2: what with all the Berbers and everything going on, the
Speaker 2: different factions on the peninsula, and they broke into typhas.
Speaker 2: So how was it that they were able to do
Speaker 2: this and break into these typhos without like being overwhelmed,
Speaker 2: Because typically if you're looking at the history of this
Speaker 2: and you say, okay, this is when the Yumid state
Speaker 2: of Kordoba broke up, So that would definitely be when
Speaker 2: a big push came. And the thing about it was
Speaker 2: that it wasn't they didn't there wasn't a big push
Speaker 2: again for fifty years after this.
Speaker 1: So no, no, And I mean so I think that
Speaker 1: that just goes to show you how I suppose Europeanized
Speaker 1: everyone had become at that point in time. It's like
Speaker 1: they can break up into the typhus and things like
Speaker 1: that because they're like, wellsh I don't know everyone else
Speaker 1: has smaller kingdoms now, So like I guess we're doing
Speaker 1: that now, right, because it's just like if everyone up
Speaker 1: in Astorias or whatever has their own kingdom, well that's
Speaker 1: that's a route to continuing rule for the people who
Speaker 1: still want to keep charge. You know, if you're a
Speaker 1: major landholder, you're still going to want to keep your
Speaker 1: land going. You're not going to want to see anyone
Speaker 1: kind of come take it over. So they just kind
Speaker 1: of break up and fracture a little bit, because that's
Speaker 1: what everyone's been doing, you know, like that's what happens
Speaker 1: when the empires fall, right, And it all also kind
Speaker 1: of shows us what I think is quite interesting is
Speaker 1: there's this disinterest coming to us from the Arabian Peninsula
Speaker 1: at this point in time. They're like, yeah, fuck it,
Speaker 1: that's too far to walk. I'm not going over there, dude,
Speaker 1: you know, like and you know, there is kind of
Speaker 1: more of a I suppose recentering happening in Islam at
Speaker 1: the time, you know, more of a desire to push
Speaker 1: into uh further into Asia then there is wanting to
Speaker 1: go into Europe. There is, and there are great reasons
Speaker 1: for that. It's like you can already trade, you know,
Speaker 1: with with the Iberian Peninsula. There's no real need to
Speaker 1: do that. Whereas if you can manage to Islamify some
Speaker 1: of these Mongols around here and stuff like that, then
Speaker 1: you stand to make a make some pretty good connections,
Speaker 1: right you know, where we're we are putting our sites
Speaker 1: on Persia in places like that instead, And so I
Speaker 1: think it just kind of shows that everything was actually
Speaker 1: fairly settled in terms of what things are, and everyone
Speaker 1: just kind of accepted that there is a bit of
Speaker 1: a melting pot situation going on over on the Iberian
Speaker 1: Peninsul's like there's all these varying states and you know,
Speaker 1: it's interesting too, because like the ten thirties, it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, so now we're in we've just got to
Speaker 1: the high medieval period. Like congratulations, everybody, We've done it.
Speaker 1: And you know, they there isn't going to be a
Speaker 1: big bunch of Christians who are going to come and
Speaker 1: take it over, because it's like Jesus, the French just
Speaker 1: had to invent Normans because they're having enough problems with Vikings, right,
Speaker 1: They're like, I don't know, I guess we've bought these guys.
Speaker 1: Now they are viking about, you know, more or less.
Speaker 1: You know, they've got a lot more back and forth
Speaker 1: going on with whatever's going on in England because that's
Speaker 1: just kind of the way that they're pointed. They know
Speaker 1: that if they want to do something in terms of
Speaker 1: like attacking you know, Muslim they're going to have to
Speaker 1: get through a bunch of Christian kingdoms first, and they're
Speaker 1: not going to be happy to see you. Yeah, there's
Speaker 1: a bunch of French people. So it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: it would kind of be up to the Christians on
Speaker 1: the peninsula, and the Christians on the Peninsula know what
Speaker 1: their neighbors are, like, they know what their neighbors are
Speaker 1: capable of. Yes, they will fight them, for sure, but
Speaker 1: you know, we're also a little bit ahead of the
Speaker 1: Crusades as well, you know, so it's sort of like
Speaker 1: there isn't this idea that like, oh, let's get together
Speaker 1: like and do like a big push because that also
Speaker 1: it just isn't in the psyche of the Iberians at
Speaker 1: the time.
Speaker 2: I guess, yeah, yeah, it's just, you know, you don't
Speaker 2: have even if you wanted to extend Barcelona or you know,
Speaker 2: the County of Barcelona or you know, the count the
Speaker 2: Kingdom of Arragon or whatever much further south, it's going
Speaker 2: to be difficult when it's just you drawing from that
Speaker 2: one tiny region and fighting with all your neighbors. But yeah,
Speaker 2: these Typhos, essentially I acted like you know, regular states,
Speaker 2: I mean kind of like Holy Roman imperial states, except
Speaker 2: there was no at this time, there was no overarching
Speaker 2: imperial structure above them, and so they would fight with
Speaker 2: each other, they would fight with the Christians, they made
Speaker 2: alliances with the you know, it's the same stuff. And
Speaker 2: I mean this is going on even after the Almorovids
Speaker 2: take over. It still takes them a while, like into
Speaker 2: the early eleven hundreds before they kind of break what
Speaker 2: the Typhos were doing like this. But yeah, that brings
Speaker 2: us up to ten sixty four, in the ten sixty
Speaker 2: three and the Siege of Barbastros, so it's considered different
Speaker 2: than the events that came before it. But from a
Speaker 2: historical perspective, how is it? Because I mean we have
Speaker 2: seen like what we would kind of consider cross national
Speaker 2: coalitions to fight Muslims in Iberia. You know, uh, the
Speaker 2: Charles Martel and his Franks and the Oquitanians under O
Speaker 2: to the Great. So you know what makes Barbastro special different?
Speaker 1: I guess that it is because the the desire to
Speaker 1: go out and get Barbastro is coming from the papacy
Speaker 1: as opposed to coming from varying rulers. Right, So when
Speaker 1: Charles Martel is doing this, he's like, hell, yeah, free
Speaker 1: land baby, ye right, Whereas more or less Barbastro is
Speaker 1: like Pope Alexander the second idea, right, And so what
Speaker 1: is happening here. It isn't about like going to nobles
Speaker 1: and just saying, hey, you want to fight. It's like
Speaker 1: this is preached. You know, they send out preachers saying,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, let's let's go. Let's go fucking get these guys, right,
Speaker 1: and so like we are going to go out and
Speaker 1: we are going to get the Burgundians and the French
Speaker 1: to kind of point themselves down here, right. And this
Speaker 1: is interesting. It has become interesting to people, essentially because
Speaker 1: from a historiographical standpoint, people like to say that this
Speaker 1: is kind of like a crusade before the Crusades, right,
Speaker 1: so this is about the papacy beginning to throw its
Speaker 1: weight around. And that is also one of the big
Speaker 1: differences between this and when Charles Martel does it is
Speaker 1: you know, when Charles Martel was doing it, the papacy
Speaker 1: still didn't have any fucking power, right. It's like it's
Speaker 1: the it's the eleventh century and the papc has finally
Speaker 1: got a little bit of street cred and they decided
Speaker 1: this is what they're going to use it for. And
Speaker 1: now obviously there is a amount of cynicism that is
Speaker 1: going to go along with this as well. You know,
Speaker 1: the church wants to expand back into the areas because
Speaker 1: they want tithes, right like, let's let's just be so
Speaker 1: real here. And basically nobles are going to do it
Speaker 1: because a they can get a plannary indulgence and so
Speaker 1: that's pretty sweet. And be like, again, if you're just
Speaker 1: like some fail son, this is a chance to get
Speaker 1: some pretty sweet land in theory, like if you're like
Speaker 1: the fourth son of a Burgundian viscount then like, here's
Speaker 1: a way to actually get something, right. So this ends
Speaker 1: up being particularly popular with like the Aquitanese and stuff,
Speaker 1: you know, like the people who are kind of like
Speaker 1: southern anyway where they're like, oh, I don't have to
Speaker 1: walk very far, maybe could get like some some more land.
Speaker 1: And we see also that like the catalogs are like, oh,
Speaker 1: sweet dog, like this is going to be good for
Speaker 1: us to get some land. And I think that there
Speaker 1: in lies kind of the crux with why this doesn't
Speaker 1: work very well, because you know, everyone who showed up
Speaker 1: is like, sweet, I'm going to get land, right.
Speaker 2: Barbastro isn't that big. It's barely a blip between Huesca
Speaker 2: and Zara, Like what are we doing here?
Speaker 1: Yeah? This is like a city, right, you know, which
Speaker 1: is also what makes this so funny because you know
Speaker 1: people now like to jack off about it, like I
Speaker 1: see people I mean white supremacists. Are they people who
Speaker 1: don't know?
Speaker 2: Like, to be clear, I was not jacking off about
Speaker 2: it in the intro. You are not you are my
Speaker 2: passionate interest versus there.
Speaker 1: I don't mean you, Luke, I never mean you. What
Speaker 1: I mean is that you know, there are some people
Speaker 1: who build it up into being more than than what
Speaker 1: it is, because like, the thing that's quite funny about
Speaker 1: this is that it is very acquisitorial, right, because like
Speaker 1: that that's why I don't fall text. Everyone's like, okay, cool,
Speaker 1: I'm here, like where's my ship, And everyone's like what,
Speaker 1: like it's only a little city, right, you know, And
Speaker 1: so that's quite funny.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's yeah, it.
Speaker 1: It is.
Speaker 2: There are differences from the actual crusades. There are no
Speaker 2: vowels in this one, there's no pilgrimage attached to it.
Speaker 2: There's less widespread preaching and church involvement, and this is
Speaker 2: strictly marshal. But a big thing in this apparently meant
Speaker 2: a whole lot to a lot of people in Europe,
Speaker 2: is that church leadership is not officially doing this. Like
Speaker 2: even though Alexander the second is like, yes, this is
Speaker 2: a good idea, it's not officially sponsored by the church.
Speaker 2: The bishops aren't like walking before people, which is what
Speaker 2: would happen later. But yeah, so it's you know, it's
Speaker 2: a difference, and that what we would consider basically just
Speaker 2: a fig leaf for you know, the for the historians,
Speaker 2: like meant a lot to these people at the time,
Speaker 2: because the difference in response from this which is anemic
Speaker 2: to thirty in thirty years, to the next one, which
Speaker 2: is over two hundred thousand people total showing up to
Speaker 2: like march halfway across the world and die in the heat,
Speaker 2: you know, is insane.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean yeah, and when you think about it, right,
Speaker 1: it makes sense because what this is is, as you say,
Speaker 1: this is a fig leaf. This is an excuse to
Speaker 1: go fuck your neighbor up and like get some land.
Speaker 1: And they're like, oh, yeah, I'm really mad about Muslims
Speaker 1: question mark, you know, and going to get some land.
Speaker 1: Whereas the Crusades, there is great, a great deal of
Speaker 1: like personal piety that comes into it. And certainly one
Speaker 1: of the reasons why it's something that people want to
Speaker 1: do is because you know, as good Christians, they all
Speaker 1: want to go to the Holy Land someday. You know,
Speaker 1: this is something that they really wish to experience. And
Speaker 1: pilgrimage is a really important part of the medieval way
Speaker 1: of thinking about Christianity and your place in the world.
Speaker 1: And I mean there's the pilgrimage to something the combozzella,
Speaker 1: but like it's not in Muslim hands, you know, and
Speaker 1: like that, and that's one that everybody goes on all
Speaker 1: the time, right, Like everybody, like people we going down
Speaker 1: to something over the comstella, like you know, they're on
Speaker 1: the commune area. They're just like yeah, what what you
Speaker 1: know all the time. So that's absolutely fine. Like the
Speaker 1: big thing that you'd be like, yeah, we must free
Speaker 1: it from these Muslim dogs or whatever is free. So
Speaker 1: it's it just it is more of a land grab fundamentally.
Speaker 1: And I think that, you know, to cast dispersions at
Speaker 1: Alexander the second, I think he's just kind of like
Speaker 1: trying to expand his tithe base. You know, this is
Speaker 1: about bringing money in from one of the richest parts
Speaker 1: of Europe. So yeah, if you could just re christianize it,
Speaker 1: that'd be great, thanks, you know.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm, yeah, it's yeah. It's also this is kind
Speaker 2: of I mean, this kind of does look like a
Speaker 2: drive run for the Albergui and Cruse where they were like,
Speaker 2: you know those people in some France they've been doing
Speaker 2: some heresy and are you sure it's just you didn't
Speaker 2: want to have the nice southern French land to yourself,
Speaker 2: you sure? No, no, no, no, I would never do that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so yeah, yeah, it's be fair.
Speaker 1: They did be doing some heresy. I mean they did,
Speaker 1: but you know, like that, I would have killed them
Speaker 1: for it. I would have killed them for it personally.
Speaker 2: Yeah. It was uh you know, yeah, you know, Barbastro was,
Speaker 2: as I said, retaken quite quickly by Muslim forces. But
Speaker 2: that would be short lived for the time because the
Speaker 2: Christians did start pushing further south at this point and
Speaker 2: they they ran up into the Almoravid dynasty. The Taiphas
Speaker 2: were fighting amongst themselves. They could really unite to fight
Speaker 2: back against the Christians who were loosely fighting more together.
Speaker 2: At this point, they the Muslim contingents had lost Madrid
Speaker 2: and Toledo by ten eighty five, but uh, the Almoravids,
Speaker 2: who had taken power in north uh northwest Africa and
Speaker 2: based out of Marrakech, they decided to come over and
Speaker 2: deal with the squabbling Taiphas, get them under the power
Speaker 2: and then and they basically rolled over and they were like, look,
Speaker 2: you can either keep fighting with each other and be
Speaker 2: ruled by Christians or uh, you know, become vassals to us,
Speaker 2: unite and push the Christians back. And they were like well,
Speaker 2: you know better the devil we know, and they went
Speaker 2: they they got under the Almoravids and it it was
Speaker 2: uh that stopped that completely checked the Christian push south
Speaker 2: for a while. They would not be able to, uh
Speaker 2: to move any further south, uh until Kowenka in UH
Speaker 2: eleven seventy seven. But uh, yeah, the Almrvids were different
Speaker 2: because they were based on a much more conservative Islamic
Speaker 2: sect and they had much different opinions on Christians and
Speaker 2: Jewish citizens than previously. Now they didn't push them out
Speaker 2: or you know, lead any state sponsored programs.
Speaker 1: There.
Speaker 2: There were a couple of earlier programs against Jews, one
Speaker 2: in Cordoba and like ten eleven and another one a
Speaker 2: little bit later, but uh those were those were not
Speaker 2: you know, widespread sponsor you know states sponsored things. They
Speaker 2: were much smaller. But yeah, things became a lot more
Speaker 2: difficult then Christians and Jews would jew were reviewed a
Speaker 2: lot more skeptically under the owl more evids than before.
Speaker 2: But yeah, it uh eleanor like I mean, I guess
Speaker 2: you can kind of understand it because like if it
Speaker 2: becomes like an existential thing us versus them, you can
Speaker 2: kind of understand how they would eventually become more uh
Speaker 2: more militant against it. Uh, you know, because it directly
Speaker 2: affects them. But you know, like what uh you know what,
Speaker 2: like you know what, what were their efforts to like
Speaker 2: do this, to like crack down, because they clearly didn't
Speaker 2: kick any of them out. They still accepted the Jesus,
Speaker 2: So like, you know what was the difference?
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, I mean the thing about the Ubians is
Speaker 1: they were like fairly lax, right, like, I mean quite famously.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: That's part of the reason why they end up getting
Speaker 1: toppled is everyone's like, guys, you see pretty drunk, and
Speaker 1: everyone's like what me, No, no, no, no, I'm just
Speaker 1: very high on hash Yeah. And also you know what,
Speaker 1: this is a normal amount of drunk.
Speaker 2: Oh oh, oh, you're perfect. Oh I see smoke weed
Speaker 2: right before I drive my son to archery practice. Oh
Speaker 2: I can't drive a chariot effectively when I've been had
Speaker 2: a little smoking. Oh yeah, good point, mom, that it's
Speaker 2: a hundred percent. Do not smoke weed and operate vehicles,
Speaker 2: or get drunk and operate vehicles anyway, Go ahead.
Speaker 1: Please do not get in a chariot.
Speaker 2: Yes, after a chariot of anything. Don't need to get
Speaker 2: on a bike. You can skin your knee and hurt
Speaker 2: yourself back.
Speaker 1: You know, just just take you take it easy out there, folks.
Speaker 2: They take old two feet on home or public transport anyway.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sorry, yeah, I mean but basically, you know, that
Speaker 1: is in very many ways the downfalls of the umiad
Speaker 1: more generally right. And so yeah, the Almrbons are offering
Speaker 1: a harsher line in Islam. But that's just because they're
Speaker 1: not drunk, just kinna, you know, they're they're sort of
Speaker 1: like doing the thing you know, which which the you.
Speaker 2: As the one of the one of the Springfield policeman
Speaker 2: has a badge in his mouth when Rix Banner shows
Speaker 2: up and kicks Wickham out of the chairs, like you
Speaker 2: spit that badge out of your mouth. You're a policeman,
Speaker 2: like exactly doing this show like you what what? How
Speaker 2: do you have three harems? This is offensive?
Speaker 1: Exactly right, Yeah, I supposedly interesting. The other interesting thing
Speaker 1: is like, you know, the al Morivans are really coming
Speaker 1: from much more of like I suppose, a Western African background,
Speaker 1: you know, like they're much more berber and their outlook
Speaker 1: and so essentially what they are offering is kind of like, oh,
Speaker 1: I don't know, localized form of Islam as well. So
Speaker 1: you know, like this is much more linked to kind
Speaker 1: of like the western Sahara urban culture, and it's a
Speaker 1: lot more hooked in with what is going on in
Speaker 1: that zone of influence, whereas I mean, granted, the Umi
Speaker 1: it's been cut off from you know, Arabia for ages now,
Speaker 1: but it is just very much like of of its
Speaker 1: time and place, if that makes sense. And so yeah,
Speaker 1: they are like a little bit more strict, but that's
Speaker 1: not saying muh, you know. And and also they don't,
Speaker 1: as you say, you know, they don't have the desire
Speaker 1: to kick out Christian and Jewish counterparts because again they're
Speaker 1: they're from this culture. You know, these are people who
Speaker 1: have been here a long time too. And also, you know,
Speaker 1: the fun thing about strict Muslims is the stricter of
Speaker 1: the group of Muslims, the more they're going to need
Speaker 1: non Muslims just in order to like, you know, get paid, right,
Speaker 1: you need that just yet. So yeah, it's like the
Speaker 1: irony of you know, strict Islam is always how many
Speaker 1: non Islamic people are are hanging around as a result, you.
Speaker 2: Know, yeah, you know, this is pretty much where we're
Speaker 2: going to leave off with the whole Christendom thing. It's
Speaker 2: starting to form into a real cause in fits and starts,
Speaker 2: and you know, the Almorovids stopped the Southern push for
Speaker 2: a time, but beginning in the late eleven hundreds, that
Speaker 2: Southern push is going to become fully unstoppable. And you know,
Speaker 2: we we know where that leads to, uh to the
Speaker 2: final banishment or the final uh throwing off of Buslim
Speaker 2: from from from the the Iberian Penunsul in fourteen ninety two.
Speaker 2: And you know they never had to think about it
Speaker 2: ever again ever. You know, yeah, we'll talk about that
Speaker 2: next time, because this is a good time to talk
Speaker 2: about a very famous person probably and we probably the
Speaker 2: single most famous person from this entire era, uh el
Speaker 2: Seed see El el Sid Yeah, yeah, there you go.
Speaker 2: You gotta you gotta say it all fancy like, uh yeah.
Speaker 2: He was born in ten forty three. He died in
Speaker 2: ten ninety nine, antagonizing the al Morovids. You know, he
Speaker 2: shows up in a lot of Siev games. Eleanor what's
Speaker 2: his deal? Why is this guy so? Why why is
Speaker 2: he so famous? And why does he have a really
Speaker 2: metal looking statue in Yas.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he does have a really metals Dutch Borgos, So
Speaker 1: he is really interesting. I say, he's from near Borgos,
Speaker 1: home to my favorite type of black pudding out more.
Speaker 1: But so he is just one of these very Iberian dudes, right,
Speaker 1: So he would just kind of work for whoever, and
Speaker 1: he was a pretty fucking good military leader, right. So
Speaker 1: he starts out kind of like working with and alongside
Speaker 1: the Castilians. You know. He he's like a lower nobleman
Speaker 1: in the same way that like everyone who you hear
Speaker 1: about is, and he kind of like makes good. Right.
Speaker 1: So he's working initially for Sancho the second I simply
Speaker 1: love to say the names of the very Iberian kings
Speaker 1: and I'm like, yeah, come on, Sancho. So he was
Speaker 1: at this point in time employed and kind of fighting
Speaker 1: more particularly against Zardagosa, and he was working alongside Sancho,
Speaker 1: and you know is Muslim at the time. But it's
Speaker 1: just also is kind of like who they're next to. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you know, so that's that's quite funny. And so they're like, okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that's what we're gonna get get down to, right,
Speaker 1: We don't exactly know what happens at this point in time.
Speaker 1: We think that maybe, like I'll see these like killing
Speaker 1: out goes people like there are some there are some
Speaker 1: like rumors that he managed to do that. But anyway,
Speaker 1: as Sancho ends up getting killed, probably by like you know,
Speaker 1: his cousins or some shit, right, And so his brother
Speaker 1: takes over from him, and his brother had been in
Speaker 1: exilent Delaedo and it was like, oh no it is
Speaker 1: my brother dad. Wow, that's crazy, bro. And so anyway
Speaker 1: he well no what bro, oh bro, No, not bro. Anyway,
Speaker 1: Hey I'm here, I'm here, I'm back right out. Yeah yeah,
Speaker 1: So like homeboys back and like you know, here we go.
Speaker 1: Like he is not particularly interested in working with his
Speaker 1: brother's friends, and Elsie'd essentially gets himself exceled at this
Speaker 1: point in time, and so he's like, okay, well all right, whatever, dude,
Speaker 1: Like it's hard to keep a good bitch down. Fuck it,
Speaker 1: we ball and so off he goes, and he ends
Speaker 1: up just kind of being like anybody anybody sells sword anybody, uh.
Speaker 1: And he ends up then going to work for some
Speaker 1: of the Muslims because they're like I don't give a shit, right, Like,
Speaker 1: you know, I just got kind of get paid out here, right.
Speaker 2: So like he.
Speaker 1: Manages to like impress anyone because he ends up fighting
Speaker 1: like the Emma Ranada, uh, and he does really really
Speaker 1: well against them, but that doesn't necessarily mean that everyone's like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, this question just like fighting him like that
Speaker 1: means everyone's like, oh, we're like I'm paying attention, right,
Speaker 1: So for over he goes end up like in Barcelona, right,
Speaker 1: and so it's like okay, yeah, that's fine, here we go.
Speaker 1: We're in Barcelona. But basically then people are like, hey,
Speaker 1: what's up, I got more money, right, and like the
Speaker 1: type of Zaragosa is like, hey, homeboy, I hear that
Speaker 1: you've been getting treated badly by your your friends. Do
Speaker 1: you want to like come and work for us? And
Speaker 1: Elside is like basically like hell yeah I will, right,
Speaker 1: And like so he he'd been you know, he can't
Speaker 1: hang out at Alphonsa's court, so here he goes, right,
Speaker 1: and so now he's working for the type of Zagosa.
Speaker 1: They end up fighting other typhas almost like primarily he
Speaker 1: does end up like beating the shit out of the
Speaker 1: Arragonese as well, which is cool, you know, and they
Speaker 1: besiege Gibraltar, they do all these sorts of things, and
Speaker 1: then hilariously then you have like the French try to
Speaker 1: get involved because like the Christians are getting their asses
Speaker 1: beat pretty badly. So here comes Raymond of Burgundy and
Speaker 1: he's like, yeah, well now I'm gonna like attack Zadagosa
Speaker 1: or whatever, and like that was stupid, you know, and uh,
Speaker 1: and like we all learn a valuable lesson, right, But
Speaker 1: one of the valuable lessons that we learn is like
Speaker 1: maybe we should call el Seed back and be like, hey,
Speaker 1: I saw you, sure you don't wanna you don't want
Speaker 1: to do that or whatever. So he gets basically like
Speaker 1: a recalled and like so he's then working for Alfonso again,
Speaker 1: and like he gets kicked some of the Almoro fans out.
Speaker 1: But then basically what ends up happening is he kind
Speaker 1: of goes out on his own. So he's sort of
Speaker 1: got his own army at this point in time that
Speaker 1: is both Christian and Muslim, and he's like, I want
Speaker 1: my own land. Like I'm tired of like going back
Speaker 1: and forth between like a Zaragosa and Castile. I want
Speaker 1: I want to be able to like make something for
Speaker 1: myself so basically he's like, well, I'm going to go
Speaker 1: and attempt to sort of take over some of Valencia. Now,
Speaker 1: the rulers of Barcelona are like, the fuck you are?
Speaker 1: You know, like I don't I would really rather that
Speaker 1: you do not do that, and Elsie's like, yeah, well
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do that anyway, right, And so he ends
Speaker 1: up laying siege to Valencia, and basically like he does
Speaker 1: kind of okay, but he ends up eventually kind of
Speaker 1: like dying. There are some fun rumors about this, so
Speaker 1: like one of them is that his wife Humana then
Speaker 1: like puts his corpse onto his horse and then is like,
Speaker 1: oh look everybody, it's el Seed and we're all gonna
Speaker 1: like the siege and everyone was yay, fantastic, like falls
Speaker 1: it out, but like that's probably like not real unfortunately.
Speaker 1: But like one way or another, he's a really interesting
Speaker 1: guy because it actually shows us, I think, what is
Speaker 1: really going on down on the Iberian Peninsula, which is,
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, whatever the fuck you want, Like
Speaker 1: you got a strong back, we could use you a
Speaker 1: kind of a deal down there, right, Like he is
Speaker 1: able to play off people very very well. He is
Speaker 1: aware of the fact that there is a possibility to
Speaker 1: take your own land if you've got a good enough army.
Speaker 1: He is willing to work with whomever. You know, he's
Speaker 1: got Muslims in his employee, he's got Christians in his employee.
Speaker 1: He is employed by varying people at vary in times.
Speaker 1: And he's also taking advantage of the fact that it
Speaker 1: is just a fucking mess down there, right. We got
Speaker 1: brothers killing brothers, we got cousins killing cousins, we've got
Speaker 1: everybody at war with everyone, and chaos is a ladder homie.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: So people like to big l seed up into kind
Speaker 1: of like an anti Muslim person, but that's like a
Speaker 1: fucking ridiculous thing to say. That means he didn't look
Speaker 1: at anything, and actually what he is is very much
Speaker 1: a man of his time and place, right, Like I mean, no,
Speaker 1: you like the all the like weird nineteen forties movies
Speaker 1: about him and stuff are all about like what a
Speaker 1: Christian guy he is, right, And it's like, yeah, I.
Speaker 2: Mean, yeah, he was a Christian, but he wasn't. He
Speaker 2: wasn't he he was He wasn't fighting the uh, the
Speaker 2: the Muslims because he hated them.
Speaker 1: No, let's not say that no, and and like that
Speaker 1: that's the thing, right, He's doing it because this is possible,
Speaker 1: and you know, he really can take advantage of these
Speaker 1: situations and play people off against each other. And you know,
Speaker 1: like you go ahead, la siage to Valencia. You know,
Speaker 1: look does it take?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: Okay? Right, like the SEASONALCI not take. But you know
Speaker 1: he gave it a good crack.
Speaker 2: Yeah I tried. Yeah, yeah, you can't say that LC
Speaker 2: didn't work with whoever came along when he needed them big.
Speaker 2: He was a big fan of the Typha of Zarigo,
Speaker 2: so he worked with them a lot and fought against
Speaker 2: a lot of Christians with them, which really wasn't that uncommon.
Speaker 2: As I said earlier, a lot of these typhos they
Speaker 2: employed Christian mercenaries who fought against Christians specifically who were
Speaker 2: really hated. So yeah, it was good times. Yeah. Anyway,
Speaker 2: enough of this Christian nonsense. Let's talk about the contributions
Speaker 2: al Anderles made during its flashing height. There's the widespread
Speaker 2: Islamic Golden Age, which goes far beyond Spain. Of course,
Speaker 2: it goes across the entire Islamic world, beginning around seven
Speaker 2: sixty eight, lasting into the twelve hundred's but it's you know, folks,
Speaker 2: we got so many things, you know, so much from this,
Speaker 2: so much astronomy, so much everything. But basically the stuff
Speaker 2: that is specific to al Andolou's astronomy a huge contributions
Speaker 2: from Ibn Tufail Alba Tragi and of course Avaros, who
Speaker 2: is a polymath. He's going to show up a few
Speaker 2: times on this hell. Yah, he just you know, he's
Speaker 2: he's one of the only one of the only Muslims
Speaker 2: of Vinsaladin who gets to stand in the first ring
Speaker 2: of Hell because he's so respected. And I mean like
Speaker 2: there are something like six six peop astronomers from Andalucia
Speaker 2: who are thanked by name by Copernicus at the beginning
Speaker 2: of they of us. So yeah, they contributed a lot
Speaker 2: to our current understanding of the universe, according to the
Speaker 2: guy who came up with our current understanding of the universe.
Speaker 1: But that's right, yeah, yeah, and you know that they're
Speaker 1: really going hard on astronomy, which is very cool.
Speaker 2: So yeah, I think there are a number of medical
Speaker 2: texts that are that try to be comprehensive, you know,
Speaker 2: because at the time they're just all kind of spread out.
Speaker 2: You get a lot of this stuff. It's it becomes
Speaker 2: you know, they there's this kind of thing that you
Speaker 2: hear sometimes about how like the Muslims might have had
Speaker 2: a better understanding of medicine at the time, and from
Speaker 2: the temp from you know, from our perspective, we'd be like, well, no,
Speaker 2: because no, you will understand it. Yeah, yeah, it's still
Speaker 2: yeah gallanic. But from their perspective, yes, it was incredibly
Speaker 2: advanced for the time. You know, they were at the
Speaker 2: forefront of four humors ology and all that.
Speaker 1: They're pretty good surgeons. Is the thing that is really
Speaker 1: going down very well in terms of Islamic medicine, and
Speaker 1: that is something that feeds into European medicine very very closely.
Speaker 1: So pretty much everyone in Europe agrees that they're where
Speaker 1: to go if you need, for example, lieball surgery, right,
Speaker 1: Like there's medical trees on that sort of thing, and
Speaker 1: that is one of the things that does improve in
Speaker 1: the medieval period. It's very specifically surgery.
Speaker 2: I mean, like like their surgery would be considered like
Speaker 2: beyond gruesome by our standards, but like if you can
Speaker 2: do like a one or two percent sent uh percentage
Speaker 2: rise in like people who are saved people who survive.
Speaker 2: That's huge because your percentage saved is already so low
Speaker 2: that like rise is like whoa, that's you.
Speaker 1: Know, no, And that's that's what it comes down to,
Speaker 1: is that there are these really big leaps that they
Speaker 1: managed to make in surgery, and surgery is the thing
Speaker 1: that is possible to get better at if you still
Speaker 1: believe in your world theory. And that's like, yeah, that's
Speaker 1: the one that's.
Speaker 2: It's funny how they're like caps on everyone like so
Speaker 2: much of it because like if you're not willing to
Speaker 2: think about germs and bacteria or anything like that, like
Speaker 2: it really limits most of your horizons in medicine, except
Speaker 2: like you can be like, wait a minute, we now
Speaker 2: know how to get an arrow out of a guy
Speaker 2: slightly better. We did it. Yeah, okay, Oh.
Speaker 1: You know what they're really good at is fistulas interesting,
Speaker 1: which is yeah, there's like lots of lots of surgical
Speaker 1: guides to that, and you know, I'm sure people are
Speaker 1: very glad that they were. So it's a terrible way
Speaker 1: to go, terrible way to go.
Speaker 2: Otherwise, it's and another big thing something we don't think about,
Speaker 2: but these people did fantastic steps forward in irrigation growing stuff. Folks,
Speaker 2: Do you like sugar, do you like bananas? Do you
Speaker 2: like things like this? Because that had those things have
Speaker 2: like worldwide applications now because of this, because the first
Speaker 2: sugar plantations were started in the Middle East by you know,
Speaker 2: I think it was under the Umids or around that time,
Speaker 2: but anyway, they spread out and went everywhere, and there
Speaker 2: is a thing called the Arab agricultural revolution, which I
Speaker 2: can't speak to the fact of whether it's actually revolutionary
Speaker 2: or not, but it was a big deal. You know,
Speaker 2: the Islamic States were very big about state sponsored agricultural projects,
Speaker 2: especially in places where like you could grow a lot,
Speaker 2: but you needed a lot of help with irrigation, like Spain,
Speaker 2: because you can there are a lot of places in
Speaker 2: Spain you can grow a lot, but you do got
Speaker 2: to do a lot of irrigation because it's pretty dry
Speaker 2: in some parts of the country. As you know, anyone
Speaker 2: who's been there can discuss. And you know, this is
Speaker 2: a big deal. Like part like the thing about Alhambra,
Speaker 2: one of the I mean, you know, it's a gorgeous palace.
Speaker 2: It's like it has like all these little fantastic details.
Speaker 2: But one of the big things about it was it
Speaker 2: helped this entire area turn into like a lush like
Speaker 2: fertile growing region because it had these advanced water gardens
Speaker 2: and these advanced water systems like their aqueducts and things
Speaker 2: like that, which are still there and still occasionally in use.
Speaker 2: So yeah, just you know, huge stuff.
Speaker 1: It's the fucking best never been.
Speaker 2: I love Alhambra. I love the look of it. I
Speaker 2: just love how fucking red it is. I think it's
Speaker 2: so cool.
Speaker 1: I love it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's you know, we talked a little bit about medicine,
Speaker 2: but al al Zarawi, who he was an earlier Andalusian
Speaker 2: a physician and was later called the greatest physician Western
Speaker 2: Islam ever produced literature. Folks, these people were doing their
Speaker 2: damn best prevent a dark ages. They were over the
Speaker 2: period from the seven hundreds to the fourteen hundreds, there
Speaker 2: are about twelve thousand known scholars fourteen thousand surviving works,
Speaker 2: and we know from you know, historical reports that in
Speaker 2: the city of Doba alone in the tenth century they
Speaker 2: were averaging seventy thousand copies Jesus of manuscripts and things
Speaker 2: per year like this is you know, there's a lot
Speaker 2: of the stuff now, you know, a lot of it
Speaker 2: doesn't survive to us because paper and all that shit.
Speaker 1: But I definitely doing it, Yeah for sure. Yeah. And
Speaker 1: you know, one of the big ways that we have
Speaker 1: a lot of texts from the classical period, it is
Speaker 1: strictly through this particular Iberian pathway. So like a lot
Speaker 1: of Aristotle, for example, comes to us via the Middle
Speaker 1: East into the Iberian Peninsula, they copied into Arabic, and
Speaker 1: then it's translated out of Arabic into Latin. So that's
Speaker 1: where the great majority of it is coming from at
Speaker 1: the time, which you know, yeah, you know, you could
Speaker 1: also argue that this is one of the things that
Speaker 1: holds medicine back. Hey hey, but you know, I mean,
Speaker 1: how is it.
Speaker 2: But like until we had microscope, until we could prove that,
Speaker 2: it's really hard for like.
Speaker 1: Medicine to like I mean, it was like, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: Jim thinks that there's ghosts on your skin and that's
Speaker 1: what's making you sick?
Speaker 2: What a idiot like I do like the idea that
Speaker 2: if this hadn't been spread that like some guy and like,
Speaker 2: you know, twelfth century Belgium is like, hey, bacteria, germs.
Speaker 2: That's a real thing, right, and people would have just
Speaker 2: been like, yes, absolutely, I definitely don't need proof of that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's philosophy, folks. Our buddy Avros is back an Avros
Speaker 2: was like he was considered a bad boy, at least
Speaker 2: in Christian circles. They were very very offensive to the
Speaker 2: you know, to the to the to the more stiff
Speaker 2: upper types. But yeah, you know he uh many contributions
Speaker 2: and many things that I'm just like, man, that sounds
Speaker 2: really smart. I'm not dealing with all much. Yeah, yeahs
Speaker 2: is a thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, And you know they're the incredible amount philosophy
Speaker 1: that's going on at the time means that you get
Speaker 1: a lot of great philosophy out of Christians and Jewish
Speaker 1: people as well. So there's a really great there's a
Speaker 1: really great culture of polemicism going on on the Iberian
Speaker 1: Peninsula at the time, which like all the scholars are
Speaker 1: really into this. So the scholars are constantly like beefing.
Speaker 1: They're just having like posting flame wars with each other
Speaker 1: and then also borrowing books from each other, which is adorable.
Speaker 1: So it creates a really great culture for these sorts
Speaker 1: of things.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's you know, this is a little bit after this,
Speaker 2: but this is when the Jewish scholar and writer Memora
Speaker 2: Montese Mamonodese. I'm sorry. I apologize to everyone who had
Speaker 2: to hear that, but yeah, you guys know who I'm
Speaker 2: talking about. Uh, he was writing a little bit after this.
Speaker 2: Of course he was not writing in uh in al
Speaker 2: and Delous because his family were run out of there
Speaker 2: by the Almahds. But but yeah, it's you get you
Speaker 2: just have this huge, this huge flourishing that goes on.
Speaker 2: And of course, like arts, architecture, like the Great Mosque
Speaker 2: of Cordova is still there in altered form.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: You just you have all of these, you know, different
Speaker 2: beautiful things. The Heralda in Seville, Alhambra's usually as we
Speaker 2: talked about, and you know, just I don't, as I've
Speaker 2: said many times, I'm not big on architectural styles. I
Speaker 2: don't understand it. But man, these things are pretty damn it. Yeah,
Speaker 2: they're They're really nice.
Speaker 1: They make some absolutely beautiful fucking architecture which is still standing.
Speaker 1: And I think that there's not a lot more that
Speaker 1: you can say for something then it's gorgeous and still around.
Speaker 1: You know, a thousand years later. That's pretty fucking good, right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's great. Yeah, it's it's great. The Great
Speaker 2: Mosque of Cordova now the Mosque Cathedral of Cordova, which.
Speaker 1: You know, it's so cool.
Speaker 2: It looks it's fucking huge. Like the idea of like
Speaker 2: the mosque slash cathedral is so funny to me, like
Speaker 2: the like the medieval KFC slash taco bell wrist.
Speaker 1: I'm at there.
Speaker 2: I'm going in here.
Speaker 1: I'm at the cothree jel what I'm at the combination
Speaker 1: great mosque and cofthree Jill exactly. Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 2: You just go in there and it's like, wow, I
Speaker 2: can do both. This is like people are just grinding
Speaker 2: their teeth to dust, Like, no, that's not the point.
Speaker 1: No, great, it's really good, very very fun folks.
Speaker 2: It's there's so much here, so much beautiful culture, so
Speaker 2: many of the things that we we you know, that
Speaker 2: we have today that we take for granted. You know,
Speaker 2: all that math stuff that you roll your eyes about
Speaker 2: that we all roll our eyes about and we think
Speaker 2: we never used but then kind of do. Uh, folks,
Speaker 2: it's all on them.
Speaker 1: And geometry, bitch.
Speaker 2: Yeah, geometry, motherfucker algebra. Uh yeah, that that's about going
Speaker 2: to do it for us today. Next time, as I said,
Speaker 2: we will close the series out and we will talk
Speaker 2: about the sad end of all antelous and uh yeah,
Speaker 2: what what it all means and why why it's said,
Speaker 2: why we lost something and uh you know why the
Speaker 2: other states of Spain should should secede if they want,
Speaker 2: because yeah, because this, yes, Spain, Spain is fake. Break
Speaker 2: break back apart into your competing little statelets.
Speaker 1: Selling shirts that just say fake across the map of Spain.
Speaker 2: No Spain, I'm gonna need all of Europe just to
Speaker 2: break into the tiny statelets it was after the Roman Empire.
Speaker 2: Let's just fall apart. You know, you guys can can
Speaker 2: Yeah however you want. But yeah, thank y'all for listening. Uh,
Speaker 2: we'll be back with that next time. And uh then
Speaker 2: we'll be back on this Friday with our fourth episode
Speaker 2: in our series on the Cameron. So come check that
Speaker 2: out all of your for all of your medieval writing needs.
Speaker 1: For your sex story based yes several, I'm sure.
Speaker 2: Uh huh yes, late that people are gonna be like, wait, sex,
Speaker 2: what was this cool? You guys want to hang out? Yeah,
Speaker 2: about doing like a medieval only fan for the last time. No, no, stop,
Speaker 2: and somebody's like, I'll give you money. It's like, wait,
Speaker 2: I don't know, hold on, hold on. Maybe I was. Yeah,
Speaker 2: as long as I never have to appear on screen,
Speaker 2: you could just hear me talking, maybe we'll see hell yeah,
Speaker 2: I uh yeah, yeah. I don't even know how to
Speaker 2: segue off of that. Eleanor what the fuck's going on? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, yeah, that's over by the end of
Speaker 1: the week. Over at my personal Patreon. If you want
Speaker 1: to read twenty five hundred words that I've written about
Speaker 1: show Girls, that's the place to do it. Baby. What
Speaker 1: the fuck else is going on?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: I don't know. A bunch of stuff that isn't out yet. Still.
Speaker 1: I know I keep saying this, but it's because it
Speaker 1: just keeps happening. So yeah, I did. The place to
Speaker 1: keep up with me is on the socials. I'm at
Speaker 1: going medieval and you know, you know, I'll be posting
Speaker 1: my ship when it comes up, you know how I be.
Speaker 1: It's like, we're un really out here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, you can. You can find me where uh
Speaker 2: you know, the socials, Luca is amazing. You can find
Speaker 2: my old show people's Sister of dew Republic if you
Speaker 2: want to hear me yep about Star Wars. Otherwise, yeah,
Speaker 2: thank y'all very much and we'll see you next time.
Speaker 1: By I don't know why that was so peppy.