Speaker 1: Folks here in the TLF Solar system, I have received
Speaker 1: some great news concerning a tremendous event taking place over
Speaker 1: the course of several days here in the TLF main feed.
Speaker 1: It's the TLFX Games, a thirty two percent tournament celebrating
Speaker 1: ten years of the Lapsed Fan to determine the King
Speaker 1: of the Cast, the greatest character in Lapsed Fan history.
Speaker 1: I'm Sean Mooney. In this week, it's a switch up.
Speaker 1: I take a look at the sheet today and I
Speaker 1: realize that opposing the character we'll be hearing from this week,
Speaker 1: the Labst editor is none other than yours, truly. It's
Speaker 1: all brought to you by your friends at Garage Beer
Speaker 1: Small Batch. Like beer, the garage is always open. Let's
Speaker 1: crack open this next encounter and keep your eyes peeled.
Speaker 1: In the coming weeks to the labs Fan's X page
Speaker 1: for your chance to vote on who advances as the
Speaker 1: King of the Cast. I'm gonna sit back now and
Speaker 1: listen as we hear from whoever this is the LABST editor?
Speaker 2: What the fuck I'm doing here? Can so many please
Speaker 2: explain to me what it is? Why am I involved?
Speaker 2: Why the fuck am I involved in this? I don't
Speaker 2: want nothing to do with this shit. What I got it?
Speaker 2: You're telling me that I am the only legitimate person
Speaker 2: involved in this whole fucking thing. How did I get involved? Who? Who?
Speaker 2: Which one? Are you fuckheads? Put my name in here?
Speaker 2: And why do I have to fucking make a speech?
Speaker 2: God damn it? All right, I'll tell you what. All right,
Speaker 2: this is my chance. This is the chance that all
Speaker 2: of you need. Now. I look at every single one
Speaker 2: of you fucking people out there, and I understand one
Speaker 2: thing you have been and I've said it for years.
Speaker 2: You've been brainwashed by these motherfucking frauds. I am your angel,
Speaker 2: I am your guiding light. I am gonna be the
Speaker 2: king or whatever the fuck this is because I am
Speaker 2: the only one who tells you the fucking truth. I'm
Speaker 2: the only one who takes fucking fucking uhh fucking pliers
Speaker 2: to open up your fucking eyes so you can see
Speaker 2: what the fuck is going on. This is it, This
Speaker 2: is my chance. I'm gonna make fucking history as I
Speaker 2: take down these motherfuckers and once again and finally destroy
Speaker 2: all a professional wrest and a fucking fake shit fuck off.
Speaker 1: We now reach perhaps the most awkward point in the
Speaker 1: event center where yours truly has to somehow campaign to
Speaker 1: win a tournament, I have absolutely no interest in prevailing
Speaker 1: in You would think the organizers of the TLFX tournament
Speaker 1: would have paid particularly close attention to the fact that
Speaker 1: as my career as a broadcast journalist developed, I left
Speaker 1: off my tenure Road Wrestling Federation from my resume. So
Speaker 1: I'm hereby announcing, as host of the TLFX Games event
Speaker 1: center that I'm not interested in double dipping. I do
Speaker 1: not want to win this tournament. Voting in the TLFX
Speaker 1: Games is expected to commence on Monday, August nineteenth. Keep
Speaker 1: it locked to the lapsed Fans. Execon out at the
Speaker 1: Lapsed Fan for your opportunity to vote on who advances
Speaker 1: to the King of the Caste