Speaker 1: Callaroga Shark Media.
Speaker 2: Hey there, I'm Johnny Mack with your daily comedy news.
You're excited for the World Cup final today. I'll be
in the backyard watching it on the laptop. It's summer.
I can't go inside. Three in the afternoon. I'm sorry. Guys.
Love the World Cup though. USA Today caught up with
Marcelo Hernandez, who does one thing and does one thing well,
maybe possibly he does two things. Well, is the second
thing being funny? No, no, it's playing soccer. Morselo Hernandez
was recently spotted at a World Cup game, specifically Columbia
versus Portugal. He was photographed in a suite with John
Leguizamo and Matt Damon. Pretty fancy. Marcelo said he introduced
Matt Damon to both his mother and younger cousin. He says,
of hanging with the actor, You're next to Matt Damon
for long enough that you like. If I don't say something,
I'm an idiot. So I asked questions and I try
to get some game from him. When I played soccer,
if I was ever with somebody was playing on a
better team or older than me, you try to ask
them questions. USA Today tells us hernand has played soccer
right up through college at John Carroll University, he quit
three years into his sophomore year to pursue comedy. Boy,
we could have had one of the great soccer players
of all time. Instead, we have a guy who does
one thing on Saturday Night Live, According to the university,
after a day of classes in soccer practice at night,
Hernandez would uber to comedy clubs to work on his set.
Eventually he realized he had to choose whose Wisely he
did not. Hernandez recalls, I had to tell the team
with tears in my eyes that I'm quitting. That drove
me to work hard because I was like, if I'm
gonna quit something that I'm kind of good at, I
should get really good at this new thing. Unfortunately, Marcelo's
plan failed, and he got kind of good at the
new thing, but not really good at it. He does
one thing pretty well. Hernandez believes he's probably better now
at comedy than he ever was at soccer. Oh, he
must have been a terrible soccer player then. Despite playing
Division IREE in college and earning an All first team
honors in Miami as a high school senior must have
been a pretty crappy league. Marseillo says soccer is a
full time job because you're taking care of your body,
and I think that SNL is a full time job
because of the schedule. You're also taking care of your mind.
You're trying to write stuff. It's a much more mental
game than a physical game. But pretty demanding for sure.
I'm curious about that trying to write stuff part, because
I haven't seen it. Establishing comedian John Marco Siraisi continuing
to do mainstream press. He talked to Wirecutter and had
some travel tips for us.
Speaker 1: Hi. I'm John Marco Siaisi, and I'm a stand up
comedian and host of The Downside podcast. I travel a lot.
I would say, at least on average, two flights a week.
It gets constant. It's crazy. I am here today with
advice for how to be the perfect airplane seat mate.
Is it annoying if they lean the seat in front
of you all the way back? It's what it's there for,
that's the function. It can be annoying. I think, like
if it's brutal, you could ask, but that's just what
you sign up for.
Speaker 2: John Marco I'm a big fan. He's the Community of
the Year twenty twenty six. He of course is wrong
about reclining. Reclining should be permanently banned on all planes.
You don't need to recline. You just do it because
the button's there. Same as when everybody first got free
minutes and everybody was on their cell phone all the
time on trains and planes and being annoying. You were
just doing it because you had the minutes. He didn't
have anything to say. Same thing the reclining button. If
we take the button away from you, you'll be mad
for like two seconds one time, and you will get
over it. No more reclining. Let's keep it technical. Wired
had caught up with Pete Holmes. Remember we did this
a little bit last Sunday while I saved some of
it Beach Friday. You know what I'm saying. Yeah, you
know what I'm saying. Pete Holmes sells us he has
eighty unread texts. He says, the thing I do most
so often when I read a text is market is unread.
That was the greatest achievement of tech in the past
ten years. If my wife texts me, it's different, but
a lot of times I feel people just bugging you.
It's like, do I work for you? When did we start? Somehow,
all of life feels like we work at an office.
Even your friendships are like, I gotta get back to Jennifer.
I think a change might be coming. AI is going
to lead to so much disinformation in your inbox, even
in your text, that we're all going to slowly walk away.
We're just going to be like amish. We're going to
be hanging out in person and talking again. We're going
to be meeting up and having coffees way more. How
many unread emails does he have? Fifty five, four hundred
and twenty six. He says, If you reply to an
email more than three times, you have to start a
fresh thread. I'm not going to dig through. I'm getting
better at being like you don't have to do that.
I don't think it's a show business thing. I just
think I'm forty seven years old. What computer does Peede
Holmes have? He says, a MacBook Air with the M
two chip. I had a slightly thin, kind of fun
one that snapped in my backpacks. I just bought this
pretty thoughtlessly, which kind of a shame. This was my
I just need a laptop. Laptop. There have been other
laptops I've had far more feelings about. There was a
MacBook era eleven inch that I still think about. It
was the smallest thing I've ever seen in my life.
And there was a MacBook that was seventeen inches. It
was huge. I still think about those computers like their
old friends. Favorite news source of Pete Holmes none zero.
I get my news from people. This is my unreliable,
biased news source, and there's nothing more fun than watching
them fumble through the mismatch. They can't even remember why.
They're angry and scared. Favorite subreddit none. The folks over
at McCalls asked Jeff Foxworthy what inspired the you who
might be a redneck one lighters. Jeff said, back when
I was starting out, would go to places like New
York and LA. Guys would go, look, Jeff, I don't
hurt your feelings, but you got to take voice lessons
and lose that stupid accent you got. It was all
good natured fun, but they were always saying I was
an old redneck from Georgia. One night, I was in
Michigan and I was telling them about how I wish
I could be sitting at a tree in the morning
because it was deer season. They were laughing and calling
me a redneck. I said, if you don't think you
have rednecks in Michigan. The club we're at now is
attached to a bowling alley that is valley parking. That night,
when I got back to the hotel, I decided to
write ten ways you know if you're a redneck. The
next night, not only do people laugh, they were pointing
each other. That's when I thought, if I could have ten,
can I ride thirty? And if I can ride thirty,
can I rate one hundred? Jeff? Of all the highlights
in your career, what's the most memorable? Jeff said, If
I had to pick one, it would be the first
time doing Johnny Courson. Back then, there were only three channels.
That if Johnny like you long enough to call you
over the couch, that made your career. So I was
out there doing five hundred shows a year, grinding. When
I finally got the Tonight Show and could do my
six minutes, they pulled me aside and tell me, if
Johnny doesn't like you, he'll just clap. If he likes you,
he'll give you the big OK sign, and if he
loves you, he'll call you over to the couch. At
the end of my six minutes, I was scared to
look because it was like Caesar deciding whether I live
or die. But it looked over and there's Johnny waving
me over to the couch. My only plan when I
started doing comedy was to be on Johnny Carson. I
remember going home that night after the show, just laying
there in the dark. I stared at the ceiling and
couldn't stop thinking about how I'd made Johnny laugh. That's
all I wanted to do. Isn't that fantastic? The Laconia
Daily Sun caught up with my former coworker, Jim Brewer.
Jim told the story about the time Jie Peshe, he
was a guest on the show. Brewer used to do
a Peeshe impression. Jim meets Pesche and says he'll never
forget it. After about ten minutes, he didn't know if
he had disrespected the actor. Jim said, he confronts me.
He gives me the whole Good Fellows Tommy seen scared
the living snot out of me. I was like, I'll
never do the sketch again, but then he said, ah,
busted you, chops. I thought I was gonna have to
pay him. Commission star trek Ruiner Pat Oswald talked about
how he dresses for different occasions. He told Forbes, I
have a travel suit, which is a nicely pair of jeans,
really good walking shoes, and then this short sleeved hoodie
with a pocket in front that I could shove stuff
in when I'm in the airport. Then I have my
wheeled two me suitcase there is a very specific one
that fits in the overheads, and then my two me
briefcase that slides onto it perfectly. When I'm on stage,
it's always a T shirt and a button up shirt.
Nothing crazy, but I dress nice for the stage. It's
same clothing during the days I have to travel. Keep
it really simple. I don't like to have too much stuff,
especially on a travel day when I have enough anxiety
because the airports have gotten so insane. Now I make
the preparation for travel just no brain or stuff. Here's
his travel ritual. Pat Noswald tells Forbes, this is gonna
sound kind of insane. I bring a ziplock bag of
PG tips, tea bags and When I land, I buy
some honey, and I always asked for an electric tea
kettle in the hotel room so I can make myself
that specific cup of tea, two bags honey. That's a
reset for me and helps me calm down. And The
Toronto Guardian as a series where they speak with local comedians.
How about comedian Nick Burden. Nick practices what he calls
beautiful nonsense or freestyle yelling, a crowd heavy and prophesyational
style shape more by people watching as a self described
social butterfly than by any specific comedic influences. That's very
complicated there, Nick Burton. He explains, although I do have
a lot of material, everyone has a story. Because I
do a lot of international shows, I enjoy hearing about
different people's lives, perspectives, et CETERA. Favorite comedian growing up
Dave Chappelle, because literally every millennial group on the Spell Show.
Favorite comedian right now sounds basic in mainstream, but honestly,
there's nobody more effortlessly funny than Shane Gillis. Dude's an animal.
Favorite place you've performed comedy Budapest, amazing city with a
vibrant nightlife scene and super cool venues. So many people
from all over the world go there to party. So
every time I've done a show there, you always get
like fifteen plus nationalities in the audience. Super cool. He
was asked to tell them a joke about Toronto, and
he said, nah, I'm off the clock. That's your comedy
news for today. At a summer Sunday, enjoy the World Cup.
I'll see you tomorrow.