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<v Speaker 1>Oh chili dot com.

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<v Speaker 2>So here's the third and final segment for the night.

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<v Speaker 2>And I took a lot longer with this than I

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<v Speaker 2>thought I was gonna, but hey, what the hell, let's

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<v Speaker 2>go deeper on these things.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay.

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<v Speaker 2>So I've gone into the thug you all, f U

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<v Speaker 2>g U letter you oil okay.

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<v Speaker 1>Section.

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<v Speaker 2>I've gone through uh poll icy Okay, the poll icy.

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<v Speaker 1>The foreign poll icy.

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<v Speaker 2>I've gone through that sum and not covered at all

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<v Speaker 2>because there's a lot of things going on deportation Nation,

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<v Speaker 2>stay tuned, because we still don't know who shot JR.

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<v Speaker 2>Who is threatening the new judge whatever his name is. Uh,

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<v Speaker 2>he's doing some interesting stuff out there, and there's still

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<v Speaker 2>stuff happening in the courts.

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<v Speaker 1>I've covered that.

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<v Speaker 2>I want some new writers to give me new, fresh

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<v Speaker 2>perspectives and you could be part of the front page

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<v Speaker 2>at o'chilli dot com. Who knows, maybe I'll just be

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<v Speaker 2>able to read from that from now on. JFK document dumps,

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<v Speaker 2>et cetera, et cetera. But here's something I want to

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<v Speaker 2>bring you a bit of nostalgia, if you don't mind.

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<v Speaker 2>But let's get to this other thing first. And I'm

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<v Speaker 2>wondering if Bpete has taken notice of this because he

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<v Speaker 2>always mentions the food banks and what's happening, because we

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<v Speaker 2>could get into Doge and the cuts and all that,

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<v Speaker 2>and that's, you know, part of the chaos that's ensuing.

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<v Speaker 2>But nationwide funding cuts halts delivery of three hundred trucks,

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<v Speaker 2>affecting local food bank supplies. This is according to a

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<v Speaker 2>couple of Fox News outlets. But I've gone with Fox

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<v Speaker 2>twenty six news. Where's it at of anyway, let's see

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<v Speaker 2>blah blah blah blah blah. I'm trying to figure out

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<v Speaker 2>where this place is actually from this Fox News but anyway,

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<v Speaker 2>from a Fox News outlet and reported many other places.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's the headline, Fresno, California. The Central California Food Bank

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<v Speaker 2>says it is now waiting on thirteen truckloads of food

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<v Speaker 2>that we're expected to be distributed to local food banks,

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<v Speaker 2>a ripple effect from massive federal funding massive federal funding

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<v Speaker 2>cuts to food assistance programs. The disruption comes after the

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<v Speaker 2>Trump administration pulled one billion dollars in funding from the

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<v Speaker 2>Commodity Credit Corporation, which oversees several national food bank assistance programs.

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<v Speaker 2>According to the Food Bank officials the cuts were made

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<v Speaker 2>without warning or explanation. Nationwide, roughly three hundred fully loaded

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<v Speaker 2>trucks are now on hold, unable to deliver food to

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<v Speaker 2>communities in need. Locally, the Central California Food Bank says

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<v Speaker 2>it is preparing for even more cuts at the state level. Quote,

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<v Speaker 2>we see an increased need due to inflation, said Kim Dilding,

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<v Speaker 2>chief operating officer of the Central California Food Bank. The

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<v Speaker 2>ever rising cost of groceries, medical care, and utilities are

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<v Speaker 2>really pushing a lot of families into our lines and

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<v Speaker 2>needing more services. So. Dildean says, one in four adults

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<v Speaker 2>and one in three children in the Central Valley struggle

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<v Speaker 2>with hunger. The food bank currently serves about three hundred

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<v Speaker 2>thousand people, a number that's expected to rise in the

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<v Speaker 2>coming months. The food Bank says the thirteen delayed trucks

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<v Speaker 2>alone represent about five hundred thousand pounds of food valued

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<v Speaker 2>at more than eight hundred thousand dollars, that was intended

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<v Speaker 2>to feed local families from April through July. Central California

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<v Speaker 2>Food Bank this is, in quotes, doesn't have the ability

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<v Speaker 2>to raise those funds or bridge that gap in this

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<v Speaker 2>quick time period.

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<v Speaker 1>Tildean added.

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<v Speaker 2>The cut stem from changes to the USDA's Commodity Credit Corporation,

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<v Speaker 2>which not only supports food distribution to struggling families, but

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<v Speaker 2>also provides an outlet for farmers to tell their produce

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<v Speaker 2>to food banks. Pause from the article real quick. So

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<v Speaker 2>the USDA, this is one of those cuts. This is

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<v Speaker 2>in usaid. This is USDA anyway.

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<v Speaker 1>Quote.

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<v Speaker 2>Food banks are really struggling right now to try to

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<v Speaker 2>figure out what to do and how to keep serving

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<v Speaker 2>the communities that rely on them, said Becky Silva, a

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<v Speaker 2>food security advocate. Further complicating the issue, Silva says state

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<v Speaker 2>funding to the California Food Assistance Program is expected to

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<v Speaker 2>plummet from sixty million to just eight million, a staggering

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<v Speaker 2>ninety percent reduction. Okay, I'm gonna pull away from the

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<v Speaker 2>article and tell you this. This valley area in California

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<v Speaker 2>because of the dense population representatively, you can transfer this

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<v Speaker 2>to the entire state of Georgia, where food banks which

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<v Speaker 2>were able to give a weekly distribution of food to people,

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<v Speaker 2>which consisted of effectively one box. And I've gone and

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<v Speaker 2>collected one of thesexes myself, so I know consists of

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<v Speaker 2>one box which usually contains either beans or rice in

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<v Speaker 2>a dried bag, and a few cans, and a few

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<v Speaker 2>other things which could be from local supermarkets, like nearly

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<v Speaker 2>gone bad fruits, nearly gone bad breads, stuff like that.

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<v Speaker 2>If you're lucky, a pox box of pasta comes with it,

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<v Speaker 2>and something to represent.

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<v Speaker 1>The the you know, the the.

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<v Speaker 2>Dairy portion of the food pyramid, if you will, and

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<v Speaker 2>perhaps some sort of packaged which is usually a can meat.

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<v Speaker 2>And it doesn't even fill up this whole small square

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<v Speaker 2>box which is about a cube actually of about two

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<v Speaker 2>feet by two feet by two feet, and that cube

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<v Speaker 2>is about half full. And they were doing that once

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<v Speaker 2>a week if you signed up up, if you got

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<v Speaker 2>there in time, and they did it for a couple

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<v Speaker 2>of hours, like every Tuesday or Wednesday, I forget which,

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<v Speaker 2>and that was that, and you had to be there

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<v Speaker 2>at about seven in the morning to collect your food,

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<v Speaker 2>and you had to be signed up in advance, although

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<v Speaker 2>you could go there one week and sign up in

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<v Speaker 2>the next week, you'd receive it. And that is what

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<v Speaker 2>they would give you. If you had a family of

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<v Speaker 2>three or four. If you had a family of I

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<v Speaker 2>think it's starting at six, you get two boxes, and that's.

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<v Speaker 1>All I know about it.

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<v Speaker 2>Now. I didn't have a family of six, and I'm

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<v Speaker 2>only got the three here at Ocelli house. But that's

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<v Speaker 2>what we got about six items in the box. Now,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not complaining. I'm just telling you the reality of it.

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<v Speaker 2>It's not as though we were filling a pantry or

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<v Speaker 2>a refrigerator or even a full dinner table. Really with

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<v Speaker 2>the products that came from food bank. Occasionally you could create,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, a day's worth of meals out of it

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<v Speaker 2>if you were lucky, but generally speaking, not so much.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh and there might be a jar of peanut butter,

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<v Speaker 2>which was usually acquired in one of these large cases

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<v Speaker 2>that might have come through a program like what they're

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<v Speaker 2>talking about in California. But that's the type of food

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<v Speaker 2>assistance that people are getting. In case you're thinking that

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<v Speaker 2>people are living lavishly for free, and hell, you can

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<v Speaker 2>always go to a food bank and get something to eat.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm telling you exactly what shows up in a Georgia

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<v Speaker 2>food bank box.

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<v Speaker 1>And I'm telling you.

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<v Speaker 2>That you had to have a government ID to get it,

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<v Speaker 2>and I don't think you could even be in illegal

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<v Speaker 2>and get it here at the food bank that I

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<v Speaker 2>know of. But I'm told that some food banks you

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<v Speaker 2>could get around that possibly and as long as you

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<v Speaker 2>proved that you lived in the town somehow and you

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<v Speaker 2>were cool. But there's usually hurdles, and that's what you

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<v Speaker 2>get for your hurdles. Now in California, my understanding is

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<v Speaker 2>that they get they were getting much better amounts. They

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<v Speaker 2>might have to cut back to Georgia levels of food

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<v Speaker 2>bank assistance.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not making jokes here, by the way.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm very seriously telling you about the realities of what

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<v Speaker 2>it is they have with minimal support coming from the FEDS,

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<v Speaker 2>and with minimal support coming from a community.

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<v Speaker 1>See if a community in.

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<v Speaker 2>General is already challenged food wise, etc. Well, they're food

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<v Speaker 2>banks which collect from that same community. Usually don't reflect

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<v Speaker 2>an abundance you know that's gonna address the need in

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<v Speaker 2>that community. And cutting back on any of it not

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<v Speaker 2>necessarily the best thing to do. When we're looking at

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<v Speaker 2>at again, eggs and chicken being smuggled across the Canadian

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<v Speaker 2>border just to try and bring the price down, I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>that's an effort even being taken on to try and

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<v Speaker 2>smuggle in some products so that you can feed people

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<v Speaker 2>at a more reasonable price. So with the added expense

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<v Speaker 2>of smuggling and everything, it's still cost effective to get

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<v Speaker 2>Canadian eggs and chicken because of what's happening here. And meanwhile,

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<v Speaker 2>I know that inflation is worldwide. I'm just trying to

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<v Speaker 2>make a point in case you are so comfortable that

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<v Speaker 2>you have no idea what I'm talking about, then I'm

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<v Speaker 2>happy for you, and I'm glad you're blessed, but a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of us are not. And I can't even get

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<v Speaker 2>to the food bank really because hey, I don't have

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<v Speaker 2>a lot of friends with transportation, and we don't currently

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<v Speaker 2>own a car. We've been without a car for probably

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<v Speaker 2>coming around to two years, and it's limited us for

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<v Speaker 2>being able to go out and make a living or

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<v Speaker 2>be able to go out and afford to buy a car. Anyway,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm gonna give you guys a little trigger warning here

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<v Speaker 2>because it's gonna get weird. And before I explain or

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<v Speaker 2>read from the article that I'm gonna probably finish off

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<v Speaker 2>this very unique O'Kelly effect news program tonight, I go

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<v Speaker 2>to looking in words, looking and words, so looking n

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<v Speaker 2>words and that is the title of the sub stack

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<v Speaker 2>that I'm gonna read for from uh, and the guy's

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<v Speaker 2>name is Ron ken Yetta. Ron is spelled like John

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<v Speaker 2>but with an R instead of a J, so r

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<v Speaker 2>O h N and then can ken YadA. I'm probably

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<v Speaker 2>mispronouncing his name because I've only ever.

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<v Speaker 1>Read it k E n y A T t A.

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<v Speaker 1>And who knows.

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<v Speaker 2>I might have some other clips to play too before

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<v Speaker 2>I'm all completely finished here, But I wanted to play

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<v Speaker 2>this portion of a song which a lot of you,

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<v Speaker 2>especially if you're over the age.

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<v Speaker 1>Of forty, definitely know, although you may have.

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<v Speaker 2>Forgotten, they had lyrics and everything else, because the instrumental

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<v Speaker 2>version of this was used for one of the most

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<v Speaker 2>popular TV shows to ever air on broadcast television.

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<v Speaker 1>And it'll become relevant shortly. Time willys our skins. It

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<v Speaker 1>doesn't hurt it.

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<v Speaker 2>Begin, but as it works it's way on to the

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<v Speaker 2>pain grows stronger.

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<v Speaker 1>Watch it now.

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<v Speaker 2>You might not recognize the tune just yet, and lyrics

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<v Speaker 2>like the sort of time will pierce our skins. It

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<v Speaker 2>doesn't hurt when it begins, but as it works its

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<v Speaker 2>way on ind the pain grows stronger.

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<v Speaker 1>Watch it grin.

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<v Speaker 2>Sounds probably, I don't know what would they call that nowadays?

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<v Speaker 2>A bit emo like some teenage poetry from somebody that

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<v Speaker 2>you thought was deep when you were fifteen, But it

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<v Speaker 2>does have a significant meaning and came up in an

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<v Speaker 2>ex post which I put out, and uh, most people

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<v Speaker 2>that are usually happy to mock me or even celebrate

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<v Speaker 2>me or whatever, didn't even want to touch this ex

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<v Speaker 2>post when I talked about something after I encountered an

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<v Speaker 2>article which I will mention in just a moment. But

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<v Speaker 2>let's listen to a little more of this tune that

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<v Speaker 2>you may or may not be familiar with again over

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<v Speaker 2>the age of forty. You might be embarrassed that you

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<v Speaker 2>didn't recognize it and couldn't name that tune right away

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<v Speaker 2>if you missed it, But some of you I know

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<v Speaker 2>have it already. Let's listen a little more before I

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<v Speaker 2>get into the rest of the score. Suicide is thangless.

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<v Speaker 2>It brings on many changes.

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<v Speaker 1>And I can take.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, suicide is painless. It brings on many changes, and

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<v Speaker 2>I can take or leave it if I please. Again,

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<v Speaker 2>sounds kind of grim, sounds kind of down. And if

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<v Speaker 2>I'm triggering you, my apologies, Maybe turn this off and

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<v Speaker 2>go do something to make you feel good. In the meantime,

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<v Speaker 2>the article that I referenced and put up on X

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<v Speaker 2>and then put a personal note to had to do

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<v Speaker 2>with this headline Vets Families of vets who die by

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<v Speaker 2>suicide battle the VA for death Benefits. This is a

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<v Speaker 2>constantly ongoing story, and a version of this hit CNN

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<v Speaker 2>dot com. But people started talking about it online and

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<v Speaker 2>I found the discussions of it holly ridiculous, but wanted

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<v Speaker 2>to add my two cents and make a comment about it.

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<v Speaker 2>And meanwhile, suicide is Painless is actually the name of

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<v Speaker 2>this song that I'm playing clips from. It was written

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<v Speaker 2>by Johnny man Dell and a little more of it,

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<v Speaker 2>and then I'll give you the punchline, so to speak

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<v Speaker 2>to why it is I'm playing it and what you

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<v Speaker 2>should know it from. Street quested me to answer question.

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<v Speaker 1>Is it to be or not to be? And I replied,

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<v Speaker 1>oh me, okay.

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<v Speaker 2>Brave Man once requested me to answer questions that are

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<v Speaker 2>key is it to.

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<v Speaker 1>Be or not to be? And I replied, oh why

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<v Speaker 1>ask me change? Please? You can the same thing, please?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay. So I fade that down just because it's appropriate

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<v Speaker 2>to do so, and I gotta tell you the last

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<v Speaker 2>line there, of course, once again repeating the refrained.

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<v Speaker 1>Suicide is painless.

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<v Speaker 2>It brings on many changes, and I can take it

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<v Speaker 2>or leave it if I please, and you can do

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<v Speaker 2>the same thing if you please.

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<v Speaker 1>And that's the end of the.

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<v Speaker 2>Song, and probably why they didn't want to include much

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<v Speaker 2>of the lyrics in the comedic show Mash because that's

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<v Speaker 2>what the theme song was, Suicide is Painless. And if

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<v Speaker 2>you actually saw the movie, as opposed to the TV show,

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<v Speaker 2>you might have heard the entire song. But anyway, it's

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<v Speaker 2>not the Forbes story or the CNN story worry about

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<v Speaker 2>vets struggling, having to fight over and over and their

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<v Speaker 2>survivors continuously having to argue with the Veterans administration over

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<v Speaker 2>benefits and all that that brings this.

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<v Speaker 1>Up, not at all.

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<v Speaker 2>In fact, it's just a reminder and based on that

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<v Speaker 2>X post that I bring it all to your attention

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<v Speaker 2>once again. So back to the substack, looking n words again,

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<v Speaker 2>Ron Kennetta. Okay, And it begins with a picture of

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<v Speaker 2>Heath Ledgers Joker, which I appreciate and I enjoyed that

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<v Speaker 2>portrayal of the Joker. I think it's one of the best.

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<v Speaker 2>All that kind of good stuff. Anybody who was kind.

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<v Speaker 1>Of plugged in the pop culture.

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<v Speaker 2>In the nineties, or is even old enough to have

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<v Speaker 2>been plugged into the pop culture of the nineties, has

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<v Speaker 2>pretty much, you know, gone into the Heath Ledger thing,

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<v Speaker 2>and it's all part of legend, reality and pop culture anyway.

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<v Speaker 2>The Joker, what happened question mark? Did your balls fall off?

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<v Speaker 2>Question Mark? In one of my favorite movies, The Dark Knight,

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<v Speaker 2>and in one of the greatest and most tragic performances

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<v Speaker 2>by an actor in cinematic history, Heith Ledger plays the

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<v Speaker 2>character of the Joker. During a scene where the Joker

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<v Speaker 2>is taunting a group of criminals, mocking their fear and weakness,

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<v Speaker 2>he famously says, what happened did your balls fall off?

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<v Speaker 2>The Joker is a psychopathic, chaotic figure, and this statement

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<v Speaker 2>is a typical example of his cruel and unpredictable nature.

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<v Speaker 2>The Joker is trying to provoke a reaction from the criminals,

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<v Speaker 2>showing them that he is not afraid to go to

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<v Speaker 2>extreme lengths Now, I pause from ken Yetta's article here.

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<v Speaker 1>To say, he's kind of got it half right.

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<v Speaker 2>You know, he's taunting a group of criminals, mocking the

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<v Speaker 2>fear of their weakness. Blah blah, typical example of his

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<v Speaker 2>cruel and unpredictable nature. Actually, cruel may be correct, but unpredictable,

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<v Speaker 2>not at all. It is predictable once you let go

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<v Speaker 2>of common convention and you understand that not everybody is

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<v Speaker 2>playing by the same rules as you. He walks into

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<v Speaker 2>a you know, a meeting, a get together, a various

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<v Speaker 2>criminal heads of Gotham, all sitting around a table in

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<v Speaker 2>the kitchen of a restaurant. I think trying to come

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<v Speaker 2>up with what the hell is going on? We're getting

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<v Speaker 2>robbed of the money that we robbed from everybody else

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<v Speaker 2>and putting our banks.

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<v Speaker 1>Somebody's robbing our banks.

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<v Speaker 2>Which I find to be an interesting part of that storyline,

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<v Speaker 2>which is often ignored. The Joker has been robbing them,

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<v Speaker 2>and he walks in to say, let's cut a deal.

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<v Speaker 2>And when they say, hey, what's gonna stop us from just,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, sending a couple of my boys to pull

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<v Speaker 2>your head off your shoulders. First of all, the Joker

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<v Speaker 2>dispatches with a guy of one of these tough guys

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<v Speaker 2>being sent over to kill him with a pencil, drives

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<v Speaker 2>that straight into his skull, end of him. And then

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<v Speaker 2>when they really get ready to threaten him, and they're

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<v Speaker 2>about ready to say, we'll screw it, We'll just send

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<v Speaker 2>all of our tough guys on you. He pulls out

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<v Speaker 2>a little string comically tied to guess what, a nice

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<v Speaker 2>grenade under his coat, where it's like, hey, anybody touches me,

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<v Speaker 2>I might mind up pulling this key out of this grenade.

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<v Speaker 1>And this kitchen is not.

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<v Speaker 2>Gonna pass its next health inspection. Now he doesn't say that,

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<v Speaker 2>but that's where I'm at with it.

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<v Speaker 1>Anyway.

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<v Speaker 2>Let's go back to Kenyetta's article and remember that scene

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<v Speaker 2>in the dark Knight, because it is a dark knight

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<v Speaker 2>for all of us at this point, and to me,

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<v Speaker 2>this is the metaphoric punchline of the day.

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<v Speaker 1>And should I play any more audio? Nah, I think

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<v Speaker 1>we're good on that.

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<v Speaker 2>You guys have gotten enough, although weenie dogs might make

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<v Speaker 2>me have to do it if they're gonna keep making noise.

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<v Speaker 1>We'll see anyway.

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<v Speaker 2>The suffix side comes from the Latin word sieda, meaning killer,

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<v Speaker 2>and sidim meaning the act of killing. The root itself

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<v Speaker 2>is derived from the Latin verb okay sodair okay which

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<v Speaker 2>I don't even recall that word, but anyway, which means

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<v Speaker 2>to cut, kill.

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<v Speaker 1>Or strike down.

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<v Speaker 2>Over time, the suffix has been combined with various prefixes

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<v Speaker 2>to form words that specify the target of the act.

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<v Speaker 2>For example, infanticide is the act of killing babies. Matricide

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<v Speaker 2>is the act of killing a mother, because obviously infantsa

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<v Speaker 2>is the babies and matri is the prefix for motherly

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<v Speaker 2>and while patricide, it says in here is the act

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<v Speaker 2>of killing a father, patri being the suffix for father Soroicide,

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<v Speaker 2>rarely used word, is the act of killing a sister,

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<v Speaker 2>as fratricide is the act of killing wait for it,

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<v Speaker 2>a brother brother. Cain will be a is the subtitle

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<v Speaker 2>the next part of this article. Demo side refers to

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<v Speaker 2>the murder of a government, encompassing genocide, politicide, and mass murder,

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<v Speaker 2>and includes any killing of a government or its agents,

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<v Speaker 2>whether international or through reckless indifference. Donald Smitty Trump has

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<v Speaker 2>tapped into Daniel Caine to be Chairman of the Joint

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<v Speaker 2>Chiefs of Staff following the dismissal of General Charles Q.

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<v Speaker 2>Brown Junior, only the second black man in the United

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<v Speaker 2>States to serve in that capacity. Cain is also known

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<v Speaker 2>as what is called a venture capitalist. This means, like

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<v Speaker 2>many in Smitty's cabinet, he will conduct himself in a

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<v Speaker 2>manner of that enriches him point blank. Think about it,

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<v Speaker 2>and then the next subtitle is I Smell a muskrat.

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<v Speaker 2>In the next thirty six months, the US will experience

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<v Speaker 2>things its population cannot imagine. It will see soldiers in

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<v Speaker 2>the streets, and it will see the death of many

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<v Speaker 2>of its citizens. For democrats to publicly fight among themselves

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<v Speaker 2>and show discord is given the nature the nation's trajectory.

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<v Speaker 2>Excuse me, political suicide. Suicide is defined as death caused

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<v Speaker 2>by self directed injurious behavior with intent to die as

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<v Speaker 2>a result of the behavior. Suicide is not painless janets

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<v Speaker 2>parallel parable. Excuse me, suicide is not painless janets parable.

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<v Speaker 2>The year my baby girl graduated from high school, some

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<v Speaker 2>half dozen years ago, I received a phone call that

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<v Speaker 2>will forever be emblazoned upon my mind and soul. The

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<v Speaker 2>woman on the phone informed me that I was the

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<v Speaker 2>beneficiary of five thousand dollars due to the death of

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<v Speaker 2>a policyholder. Since I have few relatives other than my children,

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<v Speaker 2>I was perplexed, while simultaneously ecstatic at such a windfall.

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<v Speaker 2>Being a single parent, while homecoming dances, prom grad night,

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<v Speaker 2>debate tournaments, yearbooks, and a lot of other expenses and

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<v Speaker 2>stuff was transpiring. Confused as to how this occurred, I

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<v Speaker 2>asked the woman who is the deceased. She told me

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<v Speaker 2>it was my dear friend, Janet. I met Janet about

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<v Speaker 2>a decade before her death, resultant from a local government

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<v Speaker 2>quote mixer that required my compulsorily compulsory attendance given my

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<v Speaker 2>business model.

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<v Speaker 1>At the time.

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<v Speaker 2>Janet was a high official in a famous southern California

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<v Speaker 2>city and we were kindred spirits almost immediately. During that time,

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<v Speaker 2>my baby girl was in second grade, and I divulged

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<v Speaker 2>my challenges as a black man in the United States

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<v Speaker 2>raising a female child alone. I was looking for a quote,

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<v Speaker 2>nanny and quote, and Janet said I'd be honored to

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<v Speaker 2>help if I can. And later Janet met my little

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<v Speaker 2>girl and it was as though I was watching two

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<v Speaker 2>children together. The bond they formed was real, it was organic.

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<v Speaker 2>I felt I had been blessed, so to speak, especially

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<v Speaker 2>considering Janet's off the scale intelligence. She was a bisexual,

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<v Speaker 2>white female that possessed two master's degrees and a doctorate.

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<v Speaker 2>The aforementioned city for which she was an official is

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<v Speaker 2>nationally known for progressive policies, and she exuded what the

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<v Speaker 2>city stood for in parentheses, not that I necessarily agree

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<v Speaker 2>with its policies in entirety. Gradually, Janet became a unique

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<v Speaker 2>and trusted part of my tiny family. We began a

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<v Speaker 2>relationship that was not physical in any way. It was

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<v Speaker 2>closer than that oxymoron. Notwithstanding, Janet was not my cup

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<v Speaker 2>of tea from a physical standpoint. In fact, I found

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<v Speaker 2>her incredibly unattractive in that limited sense. But her mind

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<v Speaker 2>was a the most glorious beauty. We would sit up

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<v Speaker 2>all night discussing politics and policy. Anyone that knows me

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<v Speaker 2>knows that is the way to my heart is through

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<v Speaker 2>my mind. If you can't critically think, you ain't got

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<v Speaker 2>nothing coming zero. As I got to know Janet, I

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<v Speaker 2>learned of terrible things that happened to her as a child.

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<v Speaker 1>As I am well aware.

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<v Speaker 2>That broken children make broken adults, Janet was repeatedly raped

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<v Speaker 2>as a child by her older brother, his name was Quinn.

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<v Speaker 2>This was exacerbated by the fact that her parents, particularly

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<v Speaker 2>her mother, not only failed to protect her, they ridiculed her.

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<v Speaker 2>The psychological damage to Janet was so severe that she

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<v Speaker 2>elected to have ECT only known as well, also known

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<v Speaker 2>as shock treatment. The drugs psychotropic and otherwise became ineffective,

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<v Speaker 2>and she was desperate. Now it is important to note

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<v Speaker 2>that Janet had a doctorate.

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<v Speaker 1>In psycho.

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<v Speaker 2>When she informed me of this decision, I was quite concerned,

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<v Speaker 2>though I did not know how damaging such treatment can be.

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<v Speaker 2>I'd find out late to goddamn late. My daughter and

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<v Speaker 2>I had relocated about one hundred miles away when Janet

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<v Speaker 2>started her ECT. My baby was in elementary school, and

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<v Speaker 2>my plate was always beyond full of responsibility. After the treatments,

423
00:26:26.160 --> 00:26:30.839
<v Speaker 2>Janet would often call me nauseous and disoriented, but she

424
00:26:30.960 --> 00:26:35.039
<v Speaker 2>never asked for me to come get her. One day,

425
00:26:35.079 --> 00:26:36.960
<v Speaker 2>she said it was right at the end of the

426
00:26:37.000 --> 00:26:40.000
<v Speaker 2>school day, and I told Janet, Janet, I am one

427
00:26:40.039 --> 00:26:43.960
<v Speaker 2>hundred miles away and school just let out. Given traffic,

428
00:26:43.960 --> 00:26:46.279
<v Speaker 2>there is no way I can get there. She pleaded

429
00:26:46.319 --> 00:26:48.559
<v Speaker 2>with me, and I denied her. She never called back.

430
00:26:49.359 --> 00:26:51.319
<v Speaker 2>It would be eight years later when I got the

431
00:26:51.359 --> 00:26:55.119
<v Speaker 2>call from the insurance investigator. The investigator went on to

432
00:26:55.160 --> 00:26:59.559
<v Speaker 2>tell me Janet had died from suicide, an intentional overdose

433
00:26:59.599 --> 00:27:02.799
<v Speaker 2>of the very drugs that she had wished to avoid.

434
00:27:03.839 --> 00:27:06.839
<v Speaker 2>I had never had experience with suicide, and it shocked

435
00:27:06.920 --> 00:27:10.440
<v Speaker 2>me to my very core. I remember telling my daughter

436
00:27:10.480 --> 00:27:12.640
<v Speaker 2>and we both held each other and cried for a.

437
00:27:12.599 --> 00:27:13.880
<v Speaker 1>Long long time.

438
00:27:14.200 --> 00:27:18.240
<v Speaker 2>But we were crying for different reasons. My baby was

439
00:27:18.279 --> 00:27:22.480
<v Speaker 2>crying because she loved Janet, and Janet was a trusted friend. Because,

440
00:27:22.519 --> 00:27:26.359
<v Speaker 2>you see, my baby too new abuse at the hands

441
00:27:26.359 --> 00:27:29.839
<v Speaker 2>of those who trusted to protect her, including government officials.

442
00:27:31.079 --> 00:27:33.480
<v Speaker 2>I was crying because I should have gone to get

443
00:27:33.599 --> 00:27:37.000
<v Speaker 2>Janet when she called me and needed me. I will

444
00:27:37.000 --> 00:27:39.839
<v Speaker 2>spend the rest of my natural life regretting my selfishness

445
00:27:39.839 --> 00:27:42.599
<v Speaker 2>and wondering had I done that simple thing, would you

446
00:27:42.720 --> 00:27:47.759
<v Speaker 2>still be here today. Guilt is the baddest of mfs,

447
00:27:47.799 --> 00:27:53.200
<v Speaker 2>and suicide is very, very painful. I will leave the

448
00:27:53.240 --> 00:27:55.440
<v Speaker 2>rest of this article for you guys to read and

449
00:27:55.759 --> 00:27:59.920
<v Speaker 2>understand something. As I look at the flippant way that

450
00:28:00.039 --> 00:28:03.680
<v Speaker 2>people are responding to this idea that oh, shut up

451
00:28:03.720 --> 00:28:07.559
<v Speaker 2>winding veterans family that committed suicide.

452
00:28:08.440 --> 00:28:10.960
<v Speaker 1>He was weak. You took the easy way out all

453
00:28:11.000 --> 00:28:12.200
<v Speaker 1>those things.

454
00:28:13.559 --> 00:28:15.240
<v Speaker 2>That's fine and dandy for you to be able to

455
00:28:15.319 --> 00:28:18.000
<v Speaker 2>do that from behind a keyboard, but when you got

456
00:28:18.000 --> 00:28:19.519
<v Speaker 2>to live with it, or you got to live with

457
00:28:19.559 --> 00:28:23.839
<v Speaker 2>the idea that you somehow didn't follow through on something

458
00:28:23.920 --> 00:28:27.160
<v Speaker 2>or couldn't save somebody who destroyed themselves, either with an

459
00:28:27.200 --> 00:28:33.119
<v Speaker 2>absolutely overt suicide or with something they've done to themselves

460
00:28:34.799 --> 00:28:38.599
<v Speaker 2>that led to their death, that led to their demise,

461
00:28:40.720 --> 00:28:43.720
<v Speaker 2>and you had an inkling of humanity left to you,

462
00:28:44.799 --> 00:28:49.599
<v Speaker 2>and people weren't just targets of ridicule for you when

463
00:28:49.640 --> 00:28:53.160
<v Speaker 2>you felt the need to lash out, and you know,

464
00:28:53.599 --> 00:28:57.400
<v Speaker 2>event on somebody else when you get to that point,

465
00:28:57.640 --> 00:29:00.480
<v Speaker 2>or you ever experience that, I hope none of you

466
00:29:00.519 --> 00:29:04.240
<v Speaker 2>ever do, but if you do, whether you're like me

467
00:29:04.359 --> 00:29:07.200
<v Speaker 2>at certain points in my life where indeed a suicide

468
00:29:07.200 --> 00:29:10.559
<v Speaker 2>that occurred I was a four year old and couldn't

469
00:29:10.599 --> 00:29:12.680
<v Speaker 2>have had any effect and was simply told to just

470
00:29:12.720 --> 00:29:16.160
<v Speaker 2>go be a man to get by it afterwards that way,

471
00:29:17.640 --> 00:29:20.160
<v Speaker 2>or if you watch somebody else destroy themselves from a

472
00:29:20.200 --> 00:29:23.319
<v Speaker 2>distance because you didn't run to be close enough of

473
00:29:23.400 --> 00:29:28.240
<v Speaker 2>a friend when they needed you, or if you've known

474
00:29:28.319 --> 00:29:32.519
<v Speaker 2>somebody who actively and completely with sound mind made a

475
00:29:32.559 --> 00:29:36.559
<v Speaker 2>decision to take their life because the pain was too much.

476
00:29:38.240 --> 00:29:42.759
<v Speaker 2>Until you've tasted all those flavors at the baskin robins.

477
00:29:43.839 --> 00:29:46.720
<v Speaker 1>Of destruction, you.

478
00:29:46.759 --> 00:29:51.319
<v Speaker 2>Really don't have a right to piss on other people

479
00:29:51.480 --> 00:29:58.119
<v Speaker 2>who you don't understand and claiming veterans benefits for your family,

480
00:29:58.759 --> 00:30:04.039
<v Speaker 2>because you've lost somebody who was obviously, in some way

481
00:30:04.200 --> 00:30:08.039
<v Speaker 2>or other, not necessarily directed directly, but in some way

482
00:30:08.119 --> 00:30:13.279
<v Speaker 2>or another, their experience in giving up on certain parts

483
00:30:14.519 --> 00:30:18.200
<v Speaker 2>of their humanity had to be done so that they

484
00:30:18.240 --> 00:30:24.240
<v Speaker 2>could participate in the defense of this country. On your

485
00:30:24.279 --> 00:30:29.160
<v Speaker 2>behalf and all that, keep your yellow ribbons and stick

486
00:30:29.200 --> 00:30:31.960
<v Speaker 2>them wherever you want to, and tell me about how

487
00:30:32.000 --> 00:30:35.119
<v Speaker 2>you honor and respect and thank the troops all you want,

488
00:30:37.039 --> 00:30:39.640
<v Speaker 2>but remember there's a lot of prices to be paid.

489
00:30:39.680 --> 00:30:44.640
<v Speaker 2>And some people leave their blood, their limbs and whatnot

490
00:30:44.759 --> 00:30:49.440
<v Speaker 2>on battlefields, and sometimes their whole bodies. Other people leave

491
00:30:49.519 --> 00:30:53.240
<v Speaker 2>parts of their soul. And I say, if you really

492
00:30:53.279 --> 00:30:57.440
<v Speaker 2>want to have respect for those individuals, and you really

493
00:30:57.480 --> 00:31:01.680
<v Speaker 2>want to show them some decency, you can do a

494
00:31:01.720 --> 00:31:03.960
<v Speaker 2>hell of a lot better than you're doing. And definitely

495
00:31:03.960 --> 00:31:07.759
<v Speaker 2>don't be one of these scumbags online who is flippantly

496
00:31:07.920 --> 00:31:12.279
<v Speaker 2>telling somebody who was a survivor of the situation how

497
00:31:12.279 --> 00:31:15.160
<v Speaker 2>they took the easy way out and how they shouldn't

498
00:31:15.200 --> 00:31:19.039
<v Speaker 2>be whining to the Veterans Administration for something they are

499
00:31:19.200 --> 00:31:24.440
<v Speaker 2>damned well entitled to. And by the way, I didn't

500
00:31:24.480 --> 00:31:29.039
<v Speaker 2>receive anything from the Veterans Administration because they decided that

501
00:31:29.160 --> 00:31:32.200
<v Speaker 2>my father's records didn't exist for a very long time.

502
00:31:32.519 --> 00:31:34.079
<v Speaker 1>So I never had any of that stuff.

503
00:31:34.119 --> 00:31:36.200
<v Speaker 2>And I'm not even saying it as somebody who collected,

504
00:31:37.640 --> 00:31:40.640
<v Speaker 2>but I am saying it as somebody who has maybe

505
00:31:40.680 --> 00:31:45.480
<v Speaker 2>not sampled every one of those destructive dynamics among people

506
00:31:45.480 --> 00:31:48.200
<v Speaker 2>that I've loved or cared about in my life, but

507
00:31:48.480 --> 00:31:53.240
<v Speaker 2>enough of them to say, I know what ice cream is.

508
00:31:55.200 --> 00:31:58.480
<v Speaker 2>And I may not be the smartest, most experienced or

509
00:31:58.559 --> 00:32:02.839
<v Speaker 2>anything man in the world world, but I know this much.

510
00:32:03.759 --> 00:32:05.839
<v Speaker 2>You ought to keep the names out of your mouth

511
00:32:05.880 --> 00:32:08.960
<v Speaker 2>to the people that you don't understand and don't know

512
00:32:10.400 --> 00:32:14.400
<v Speaker 2>who are making a point about the rest of the

513
00:32:14.519 --> 00:32:23.279
<v Speaker 2>cost for people that pay it while you sit in

514
00:32:23.359 --> 00:32:26.160
<v Speaker 2>comment about it and think it's okay to leave it

515
00:32:26.200 --> 00:32:29.119
<v Speaker 2>in the hands of a Fox TV show host to

516
00:32:29.200 --> 00:32:31.920
<v Speaker 2>make decisions, because I could have talked about, you know

517
00:32:32.000 --> 00:32:35.039
<v Speaker 2>how there was a reporter left in a chat in

518
00:32:35.119 --> 00:32:38.200
<v Speaker 2>an unsecured line about you know, possible plans for bombing

519
00:32:38.240 --> 00:32:40.319
<v Speaker 2>Yemen and all that, but you can go ahead and

520
00:32:40.440 --> 00:32:44.759
<v Speaker 2>check it out. Just think about whose hands you're putting

521
00:32:44.799 --> 00:32:51.200
<v Speaker 2>all those lives in. The true believers who sign up, Hey,

522
00:32:51.279 --> 00:32:55.039
<v Speaker 2>sometimes they're actually foreign people that are trying to earn

523
00:32:55.079 --> 00:32:59.000
<v Speaker 2>their citizenship, and sometimes there are people that were born here,

524
00:33:00.000 --> 00:33:03.160
<v Speaker 2>but for some reason that I can't quite fathom, still

525
00:33:03.359 --> 00:33:07.079
<v Speaker 2>one hundred percent believe in the American dream and believe

526
00:33:07.359 --> 00:33:14.119
<v Speaker 2>that their service will contribute to preserving it. I don't agree,

527
00:33:14.359 --> 00:33:18.720
<v Speaker 2>and I think they're often misused, misplaced, and absolutely abused

528
00:33:18.759 --> 00:33:22.039
<v Speaker 2>by a system that uses them to benefit people that

529
00:33:22.119 --> 00:33:23.240
<v Speaker 2>they wouldn't even.

530
00:33:23.160 --> 00:33:24.960
<v Speaker 1>Spit on if they were on fire.

531
00:33:27.960 --> 00:33:31.759
<v Speaker 2>But nonetheless, as an outsider, why don't you take the

532
00:33:31.799 --> 00:33:35.759
<v Speaker 2>time to think about it before you start commenting on

533
00:33:35.880 --> 00:33:41.200
<v Speaker 2>exactly what somebody should and should not have in their

534
00:33:41.240 --> 00:33:45.240
<v Speaker 2>own personal circumstance and those who have to survive it

535
00:33:45.640 --> 00:33:49.279
<v Speaker 2>after they collapse under the weight of their own personal

536
00:33:49.319 --> 00:33:56.759
<v Speaker 2>experience when they've worn a uniform. So all that aside,

537
00:33:56.839 --> 00:33:59.519
<v Speaker 2>I urge you to continue to support ocell dot com

538
00:33:59.559 --> 00:34:03.839
<v Speaker 2>the effect and hopefully we'll continue to thrive, survive, and evolve.

539
00:34:05.519 --> 00:34:15.679
<v Speaker 2>But the day that suicide is less painless than living here.

540
00:34:12.079 --> 00:34:14.079
<v Speaker 1>Might be the day that you see a lot of

541
00:34:14.119 --> 00:34:19.639
<v Speaker 1>people go away. Huh. Go to Shelly dot com. Support

542
00:34:19.679 --> 00:34:22.920
<v Speaker 1>this if you care at all to hear so you

543
00:34:23.039 --> 00:34:23.280
<v Speaker 1>don't