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Speaker 1: Caloroga Shark Media.

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Speaker 2: Conan O'Brien addressed what's up with his hair? Hello from poolside.

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I'm Johnny Mack with your daily comedy news. It is

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seventy one degrees, Sonny out. The humidity's fifty five to

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do points like fifty three, one of the top ten

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days you're going to get. So we are not sitting

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in a basement today when we can do this outside

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with this cadas, the birds, the pool, the dogs, and

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the landscapers. You may recall people were wigged. Well that's

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a bit of a pun. People were wigged that Conan

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O'Brien had slicked back hair. Conan addressed the situation. He

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told a long version of the story on his podcast.

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I started to pull the audio from it, it would just

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take too long to get to it, so let me

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just tell you what he said. He was invited to

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the opening of the Obama Museum. He realized the opening

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would be held outside, He put some sunscreen on his

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face and went about his day. Conan explains, it's three

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hours plus and when it's over, I'm so glad that

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I put the sunblock on, and I'm feeling really good

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about myself, like smart move. He goes over to talk

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to some fellow guests who he called bright red, like

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Stephen Colbert and David Letterman. He said those gentlemen looked

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like they had been playing in a sandbox with plutonium. However,

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Conan says, a day or two later after the event,

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I feel like my skull is on fire. And then

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two days after that, my scalp is really itchy, and

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whenever I itch it, it looks like a snow globe, it

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looks like confetti. White freckled Confetti's pouring off my head.

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It's disgusting. He was confused, he thought he was going crazy.

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Someone let him know he had a scalp sunburn. Conan said,

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I'm not used to that because I've got so much hair,

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but this sun just blasted right through my hair, roasted

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my scalp, and someone said, to treat this, you have

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to rub oil into it. So this morning I rubbed

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oil into it, not thinking about the podcast when we

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went on camera, and then I come in and I

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look like I'm in Shanta Na. I'm a grease ball.

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I'm so greasy. I'm Frankie Valley. We'll see if it

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goes back to the pompadoor. We'll keep it at twelve thirty.

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Make twelve thirty great against. Seth Myers has been bashing

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the President of the United States. Now, the President and

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I don't agree on all the issues, but one of

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the issues we do agree on is making twelve thirty

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great again. We need to get back to the days

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of Letterman and Conan. And yet Seth Myers has a

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show for some reason, and Seth was mocking the commander

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in chief for staying on stage during the World Cup.

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The New York Post has brought this to my attention.

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Apparently Seth took issue with a truth social post from

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the President of the United States in which the President

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praised Andrew Giuliani, who is the White House's point person

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for the tournament and coincidentally, the son of Rudy Giuliani.

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That doesn't mean Andrew wasn't the perfect person to run

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these things. He just happens to have a famous father. Anyway,

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I digress. Trump thanked the younger Giuliani for elevating the

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World Cup to a level that nobody thought was possible.

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Seth Myers, who has a show at twelve thirty for

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some reason, said all right, calm down. It was already

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the biggest sporting event in the world. It's not like

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he sold seven million pickleball tickets. Myers also made fun

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of Trump's comments during a pregame interview before the World

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Cup final. The President said Ronaldo has a much easier

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life and that he'd like to trade places with the

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soccer star for a month or so. Seth Meyer said,

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or longer. You ever watched Ronaldo like run full speed

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up and down a soccer pitch and you're like, this

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guy doesn't worked as hard as President Trump. Seth Myers

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also suggests that President Trump is a sports reaper because

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when he attends games, the teams he's rooting for lose.

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I do like this joke, though, Seth said, They're going

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to have to sage MetLife Stadium to get the hecks out,

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otherwise the Jets might have a bad season. Love It

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Jimmy Kimmel's Old Variety. The ratings are very strong, which

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we are very grateful to CEBs for their wisdom. We

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were doing pretty well before that, but that really helped that.

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Of course, is the ending of The Late Show with

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Steven Colbert, which nobody talks about it anymore. Except Jimmy Kimmel.

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Kimmel told Variety asked Colbert if it liked to guest

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host the Kimmel Show. Colbert politely declined. Jimmy said, of course.

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I asked him, and I think it feels premature, but

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I told him anytime you want to host it, it

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doesn't matter if it's the summer, I'll gladly step aside.

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Jimmy Kimmel was out promoting celebrity Millionaire. I guess people

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watch this stuff. I'd rather watch civilians than celebrities. Some

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of the celebrities are Colin Jostin, Michael Shay. Kimmel said,

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I don't really know those guys. I learned that Michael

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is very decisive and Colin is not, and in a

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battle of the decisive and indecisive, the indecisive always wins.

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Colin was really weighing things out in general on Millionaire.

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Whatever your first thought is is probably the right answer,

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unless you really have no idea. But people have a

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tendency to blurt out what they think is the answer,

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and then they take a long time talking themselves out

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of that correct answer, and usually they'll come back to

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the correct answer, but sometimes they talk themselves out of it.

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In an unrelated clip, Colin jos explained how to pronounce

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his wife's name. I didn't know, we didn't know how

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to pronounce it. But here's Colin Jost telling us the

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proper way to say Scarlett Johansson.

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Speaker 1: How do you.

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Speaker 2: Pronounce your wife's last name?

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Speaker 1: Is it Joe Hanson or Yo Hanson? I don't know.

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I've never met her in person yet, but so I

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want to hear how she says it Johansson. I mean

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I certainly say Johansson. I mean I don't say it

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really ever, but.

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Speaker 2: Yo, Joe Hanson.

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Speaker 1: Why is the fridge empty? But it was originally she's Danish.

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I think her family is kind of a mix, probably

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kind of went back and forth a little bit between

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Denmark and Sweden. So it was definitely it was Johannes

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Johanssen probably originally, and I was probably Yost in Germany.

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But now that's all along forgotten. So we all we

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changed together, All ancestors coordinated, and so let's get them together.

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Are you with Michael Chang? I didn't say you can

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have a second question.

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Speaker 2: Did you see the Howie Mandel impersonator on America's got talent. Yeah.

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A guy came out dressed as Howie Mandel. He called

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himself Howard Michael Lando. Simon Cowell asked why. From the sidelines,

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Terry Crews said this is disturbing. Before Howard Michael Lando

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could do his act, meil Be reached across the judges

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table and hit all four red buzzers. The audience protested

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and pleaded with the panel to give a fake Howie

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Mandel a chance for lunch today.

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Speaker 1: I couldn't decide if I wanted a pickle with my

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sandwich or not. I was like dil or no dil.

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Speaker 2: He then did a second joke, which was if I

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was on a farm, I'd be Cowie Mandel. Definitely time

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to hit the buzzer and Melb said that was not good.

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She asked the audience did anybody laugh? They went to

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the vote. All the judges said no, fake Cowie Mandel

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said that's fair. Good night. Bob Marley caught on fire

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and first of all, this is comedian Bob Marley. I've

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worked with Bob a little bit over the years. I

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remember one time he was trying to set the record

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for longest comedy set up. I can't remember if he

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has the record now, or if Chappelle does, I could

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look it up, and I'm too lazy. I think Marley

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does because we broadcast the whole thing live on satellite

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radio a million years ago. Anyway, he goes by comedian

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Bob Marley, so you don't think he's the reggae guy.

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And then in the computers we always had a label

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at comedian Bob Marley. Otherwise his stuff was really difficult

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to schedule because you'd want to schedule a comedy record.

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He'd accidentally schedule. I shot the sheriff. You don't want

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to do that. Comedian Bob Marley caught on fire. He

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was forced to dive into the lake by his camp

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when a sweatpants caught on fire. John, we all heard

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your chuckle during the story. Do you think it's funny

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that Bob Marley caught on fire? Apparently you do. We

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heard the chuckle. Don't edit it out. You cowered. What happened?

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Bob was making s'mores. He was cooking with Uncle Jimmy,

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and one of Uncle Jimmy's s'mores got overcooked. Bob Marley

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went to rescue his seventy nine year old uncle Jimmy's

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s'more from the fire, and the blaze jumped from the

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fire to the sweatpants. Uncle Jimmy said, Bobby, your leg's

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on fire. Bob Marley said, I know, Jimmy. Oh see,

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this is why I love recording outside. I'm deliberately doing

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this for the randomness. Do you hear that? I don't

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know if you can hear that, but again, I'm in

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my backyard. No one's doing anything wrong. You're not supposed

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to record your podcast Poolside, John, You're supposed to record

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it in a basement like losers do. Anyway, the neighbor

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is now having his generator serve, so that's why you

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hear the generator noise. I'm leaving all this in. That

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is the beauty of Poolside. This is why you work

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for yourself. I could be trapped in an office in

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New York City staring out the window, going it's seventy

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one degrees out in sunny, and I'm trapped in this office.

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So we're gonna put up with the generator guy. I digress.

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Before all that happened, you may recall Bob Marley was

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on fire. Uncle Jimmy said, Bobby, your leg's on fire.

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Marley said, I know Jimmy Bob Marley jumps in the lake,

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and he explains when I was in the water, I

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took off my sweatpants and my shirt and put them

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on the doc to dry, and then I got up

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on the docks, standing there in my underwear. Then I

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see a pontoon boat coming toward me with three one

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hundred and ten year old ladies on it. One of

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them asked me, Bob, are you standing there in your underwear?

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And Marley said yes, I am. Okay, I actually put

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a note in this week's show to remember to promote

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the Weekly Comedy Thing. It was pointed out to me

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in the Facebook group Daily Comedy News Podcast Group that

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I never remember to promote it. What is this weekly

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Comedy Thing? John? Okay. There's an app it is called

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Live One where you can listen to music and the

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comedy stations. I program the comedy station so you can

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listen to comedy. The app is free. All this is free.

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You can just do this for free. And then on

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Sundays I published a show called The Weekly Comedy Thing,

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which kind of sort of overlaps with this show. Now

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this is where I can do long form versions of

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the stories, and on the weekly comedy thing, I'm more

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of a jock, so I'm trying to keep the story

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super tight. But over there I can actually play the

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comedy clips. So if I tell you say, Mark Maren's

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going to be at a film festival, I can play

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Mark Maron after it. If you're into you discovering new comedians,

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some of the newer comedians you'll hear this week on

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the show Ali Hassan, Tom Staid, Kyle Gordon, and Whitmer.

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Thomas also got some Bob Marley in there. You know

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why the story I just told you, except on that show,

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I tell the twenty second version of it. It is

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the final day of Just for Laughs Montreal. It wasn't

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much buzz this year. At five o'clock today May Martin

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is recording a Netflix special and again at eight thirty,

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we'll keep the best take. There only two other shows,

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Raffy Bostos is at Club Soda at seven and Lucy

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Dorling at seven. That's kind of it. I mean, I'm

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glad the festival's back, but Netflix says stolen their corner,

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as they say in Montreal, because zat they want to

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hit the nasty show. During the comedian CP talked to

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the gazette and said, this is a very smart comedy crowd.

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As a comedian, that's one of the most important things

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that your audience understands how to be an audience. It's funny.

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Some people are intimidated by the French, but then you

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come and they have a high ballot for comedy. Also,

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they're not sensitive. They understand a lot of jokes derive

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from inappropriate places and they love that. We are told

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CPS cartoon like Cadence echos the early days of M

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and M, with whom CP's uncle Trick Trick is a

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frequent collaborator. The essence of Slimshady can be found throughout

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his high energy, envelope pushing storytelling, which covered everything from

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some dirty stuff I don't want to get into, and

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some more dirty stuff I don't want to get into,

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and then a third thing that's kind of dirty that

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involved the wildfires and the words squirting. You figured out

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it is the nasty show after all, John, what do

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you think was gonna happen? Ontario's Rebecca Reid came in

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and told some jokes about various private parts. Really good

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punchline here, but I can't set it up for you.

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Go to the Montreal Gazette to read it. Meanwhile, at

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the Culture Show, Dave mer Hedge was your host. He

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told Cult MTL it's such a dope festival to perform at.

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He also called Montreal a savvy audience with good knowledge

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of stand up, which allows comedians to be themselves. The

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Culture Show formerly known as the Ethnic Show and then

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was known as Just for the Culture. I didn't even

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realize they had switched this name. Just for the Culture

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was bad. The Culture Show is better. I still like

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the Ethnic Show the best. Come on, we all know

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what this is anyway. The concept is simple. Five comics

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of different backgrounds come together for an evening of laughs.

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Dave mar Hedge was your Lebanese comedian. Then we got

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Wise Cal Tara, Canishtraki, high energy Keith Pedro and the

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methodical and storytelling driven Alfred Roebliss. And that is your

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comedy news on a summer Sunday. Pretty strong for a

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summer Sunday. And I will see you tomorrow