Speaker 1: This is well, good evening, folks, And apparently my co
Speaker 1: hosts have gone dark on me or just left. So
Speaker 1: I have made a few phone calls here and there,
Speaker 1: and I am I'm proud to present.
Speaker 2: Whoa what are you?
Speaker 3: Whoa?
Speaker 4: Whoa? Get back out of here, Clark, Get out of here, Clark.
Speaker 4: You don't need to be anywhere near a microphone. You're
Speaker 4: freaking idiot.
Speaker 3: Move move, just moved.
Speaker 1: Apparently one guest is uh not just a second hostile takeover.
Speaker 3: Hang on, I've gotta I've gotta get gotta get everything
Speaker 3: set up here.
Speaker 5: It doesn't make me proud to type what I'm about
Speaker 5: to pray type.
Speaker 3: Glad to be here on the show. To shut up,
Speaker 3: shut up.
Speaker 1: Yes, folks, as you can see, we.
Speaker 5: Have uh go back to laughing at fake Glynn backless
Speaker 5: one and only mister Alex Jones infra Wars.
Speaker 1: Mister Jones, thank you for joining us on the Ranch
Speaker 1: Show today.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm excited to be here. We've got a lot
Speaker 3: of talk. Name Miller. I just I just have to
Speaker 3: tell you admitment.
Speaker 6: I am being persecuted, and I am being prosecuted unlawfully legally,
Speaker 6: I don't know, but we're gonna make it for it.
Speaker 3: If you'll just go to my website before it gets
Speaker 3: sold and my supplements. It will make you strong, It'll
Speaker 3: make you feel.
Speaker 2: Like a man.
Speaker 1: No, no, sir, Hold on a second, sir. We we
Speaker 1: don't have the contractual agreement to name those websites, so
Speaker 1: please refrain. You may slightly mention them, but until we
Speaker 1: have a contractual agreement, which I don't know if I
Speaker 1: want to do one way now, because.
Speaker 4: We listen, if I'm I'm talking about whatever I want
Speaker 4: to talk about, all right, all right, madam Bill, you're.
Speaker 3: Just gonna have to We're just gonna have to just
Speaker 3: shut up and let me do what I wanted to.
Speaker 3: Who else is here? I don't even know why. Why
Speaker 3: do we even happen?
Speaker 1: Well, because we'd like a three prong approach to all topics.
Speaker 1: So the other person.
Speaker 2: Does somebody say three way?
Speaker 1: This is going downhill really fast, folks. I'm sorry, someone
Speaker 1: get on as as you can see, folks, my first
Speaker 1: guest is the one and only Alex Jones, and my
Speaker 1: other esteemed a guest is R F K JR.
Speaker 2: Macimiller. I gotta tell you something real quick.
Speaker 7: You're you ready, Absolutely, there's an article that came out
Speaker 7: of media said that I grabbed New York Magazine corresponding
Speaker 7: Olivia Newsy's hand during a hike.
Speaker 2: I did not grab her hand. I grabbed her butt.
Speaker 1: Sir, Please, we're trying to keep this family.
Speaker 2: More fake news.
Speaker 1: I grabbed her, Junior. This is a family.
Speaker 2: I got a brain worm. This I'm making families. I
Speaker 2: don't even know the kids. No, no, no, r f K.
Speaker 1: R F kid Junior. Please, this is a family friendly show.
Speaker 1: We got to keep it family friendly. Please refrain from
Speaker 1: speaking about the female's anatomy of where you supposedly may
Speaker 1: have or may have not touched or grabbed.
Speaker 7: Well, I'm just trying to collect the fake or correct
Speaker 7: the fake news because he said allegedly, I grabbed New
Speaker 7: York Magazines correspondent to Olivia Newsy's hand. I did not
Speaker 7: grab her hand.
Speaker 2: I grabbed her butt.
Speaker 1: Just stop stop with the hand, stop at the hand, sir.
Speaker 2: So all right, let's talk about three ways. Oh no, okay,
Speaker 2: Olivia Newsy is a lizard person.
Speaker 7: She's part of the deep state. I know I Alex I.
Speaker 2: Made a mistake.
Speaker 1: Okay, well, so.
Speaker 5: Than to get involved with the media, s r FK
Speaker 5: I loved you one time, and you you've just went
Speaker 5: off in the deep end. At this point, I really
Speaker 5: am disappointed in the decisions that show I have.
Speaker 1: I have a question that never never.
Speaker 7: Sends spicy messages to somebody of the deep space.
Speaker 2: Just the brain worm was feeding. Brain worm was feeding.
Speaker 1: Sorry, but but now I'm the lone host of the rancho.
Speaker 1: Right now I get to ask the questions. So my
Speaker 1: first question, and it's kind of a debate debate for him,
Speaker 1: and we're gonna start with mister mister Jones first. But
Speaker 1: the question is to both of you, So RFK be listening,
Speaker 1: Who out of the two of you is the healthier one.
Speaker 5: Well, clearly you look at me, and while I may
Speaker 5: not be a typical body style, I have wrestled a
Speaker 5: bear before.
Speaker 1: Junior, Junior, this is not your time, your time, Jones, please, it.
Speaker 2: Was It was.
Speaker 5: It was a grizzly bear and I you know, we
Speaker 5: and we fought, and it was it was a great battle.
Speaker 5: It shouldn't it should have been a book made out
Speaker 5: about it. That's that's what I should sell next on
Speaker 5: the side to help pay for these legal phases.
Speaker 3: The book of My Fight between Me and the grizzly bear.
Speaker 5: And so while r f K may look may look
Speaker 5: good for his age, I can tell you right now,
Speaker 5: if we were to get in a fight, I would
Speaker 5: absolutely rip that man limb from limb, There's no doubt
Speaker 5: about it.
Speaker 3: And then I would feast on his flesh.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so thank you, thank you again. Family friendly,
Speaker 1: family friendly. Here where let's let's refrain from speaking of
Speaker 1: ripping flesh off of our other people.
Speaker 2: R f K, why don't you I didn't grab her hand.
Speaker 3: I wish that's right?
Speaker 2: Okay, r f K.
Speaker 7: How do we know this is even I'm in the
Speaker 7: dark because I'm hiding from my wife because you found
Speaker 7: out I touched the kaboo.
Speaker 1: I can take that. I can take that answer. Okay.
Speaker 1: So mister r f K June your god, please please
Speaker 1: tell us why you believe that you are the healthier
Speaker 1: of the two guests right now.
Speaker 2: Well, look at me.
Speaker 7: I don't look like I eat Arby's every day. Here
Speaker 7: I'll show you how healthy I am.
Speaker 2: You're ready? Ready? Here we go? One, two, three?
Speaker 1: Mister what what are you doing? Are you doing? Jumping Jack's? Okay?
Speaker 1: Moving on, moving on that next question. We're gonna start
Speaker 1: with mister r f K JR. Okay, so mister r
Speaker 1: f k.
Speaker 7: Hey, listen, listen, Maga Miller. I gotta tell you something
Speaker 7: you cannot divide. You can't divide me and Alex Jones
Speaker 7: in a in a petty little deep state, uh, the
Speaker 7: battle of who's stronger.
Speaker 2: Because I'll tell you why. We are brothers against the
Speaker 2: deep space after our children, Maga Miller.
Speaker 5: They're coming after our children after you, not against these
Speaker 5: people because they want our kids and they want my website.
Speaker 1: Okay, mister k here's the next question. Between the two
Speaker 1: of you, who has had more conspiracy theories become conspiracy effects.
Speaker 3: Well that was clear.
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, I think that's Alex Jones. That's Alex.
Speaker 7: I probably I probably could remember all the conspiracy theories
Speaker 7: over my lifetime, but between angry wives and brain worms,
Speaker 7: I kind of forget things. So we're gonna say, we're
Speaker 7: gonna we're gonna say, my good friend there, Alex Jones
Speaker 7: of Texas.
Speaker 5: All right, every everything, everything is a conspiracy, Nate Miller.
Speaker 5: And when you think everything is a conspiracy, something that's
Speaker 5: gonna stick.
Speaker 7: Every once in a while, here you want to hear
Speaker 7: some more Alex, I know you'll like this.
Speaker 2: Cheer me on, Alex.
Speaker 5: One stop you can keep going.
Speaker 1: Please stop. This is a family friendly word sounds just so.
Speaker 2: Hey, hey, hey, hey magamilla. Let me tell you something.
Speaker 7: I know this is a family friendly show because I
Speaker 7: even tell my wife that these women are just friends.
Speaker 1: Okay, So okay, we're gonna play a little uh wishful thinking. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's the game which will think.
Speaker 3: Could you take off your son blasses Macanmillar? I want
Speaker 3: to know if I could trust.
Speaker 1: You can trust me?
Speaker 2: Lizard eyes?
Speaker 1: Do you have lizard I don't have lizard eyes.
Speaker 2: Do you have a brain worm?
Speaker 1: No? I barely have a brain to have a brain work,
Speaker 1: so I don't have a brain worm. Okay, so.
Speaker 3: We're an important thing you said all night?
Speaker 1: My word, thank you, sir.
Speaker 2: I don't like this. I don't like this deep state agent.
Speaker 1: I'm against the Deep States buffoons anyway. Okay, so that's.
Speaker 7: Okay, mister say would say you think the deep state
Speaker 7: is gonna say Hi, I'm with the deep State.
Speaker 2: Nice to meet.
Speaker 7: I don't belong to They're gonna they're gonna tell you
Speaker 7: I I don't like the deep State, but really they do.
Speaker 2: And I'm wondering that about you.
Speaker 1: Okay, mister Jones, open your eyes or they're all around us.
Speaker 1: If Donald J. Trump were to win the president.
Speaker 2: Forget what I said six months ago about him. I'm
Speaker 2: talking about today.
Speaker 1: That's why I'm talking to mister Jones, Junior. Shut up.
Speaker 2: He showed he told me.
Speaker 1: Shut up, Jones.
Speaker 7: He showed me how to do jumping. Jackson, you would
Speaker 7: call on two. That was all Donnie right there. He's
Speaker 7: showed me that.
Speaker 1: Okay, Jones. If President Trump were to be reinstated or
Speaker 1: or won the election, this.
Speaker 2: Qu when when your deep state hack?
Speaker 1: Okay, when he went when he wins in November, If
Speaker 1: you had your pick of position in his cabinet, which
Speaker 1: position would you like?
Speaker 2: Jones?
Speaker 1: I'm going for Alex Jones. Now, mister Jones, what position that.
Speaker 2: I want to take?
Speaker 7: Any positions so I can get away from my wife
Speaker 7: and closer to Olivia.
Speaker 1: Okay, Alex Jones, because your website and everything is being
Speaker 1: sold off. What position would you like in the cabinet
Speaker 1: of a Trump presidency.
Speaker 5: I would lack a new position to be created, and
Speaker 5: I would like it to be named.
Speaker 3: Legal owner of info Wars. So then so that I
Speaker 3: can tell my empirement.
Speaker 5: I just I don't really care about anything but getting
Speaker 5: the truth to people. So yeah, I would just I
Speaker 5: would like him to create a new position called legal owner.
Speaker 3: Of Info Wars forever.
Speaker 5: Any Ways, until he dies, I'll go I'll go back
Speaker 5: to trying to figure out who's a.
Speaker 3: Lizard, who's not a lizard?
Speaker 5: You know what exactly it is they're trying to do
Speaker 5: to our gun sure, the downfall of humanity, this is
Speaker 5: this is what the people want, That's what.
Speaker 2: They want to hear.
Speaker 3: The vast majority of.
Speaker 5: Americans don't believe that what I speak about is conspiracies.
Speaker 2: They believe that.
Speaker 3: When I talk, it is the truth. And I also
Speaker 3: believe that I'm a.
Speaker 4: I'm a little bit of an idiot, though I can't
Speaker 4: have to admit that. But but but what I.
Speaker 5: Have to say is is that leads me down the
Speaker 5: pathway to find things that other people won't find, and
Speaker 5: to dig in places that other people won't dig. Not
Speaker 5: unlike my friend Donald who dug into Laura Loover.
Speaker 1: Family, the Hey why Robert Jr? Same question for you?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 1: When President Trump went in November, what position in his
Speaker 1: cabinet would you like to have or be placed in.
Speaker 1: What position would you like to be placed in in
Speaker 1: the cabinet of a Trump president?
Speaker 2: Yes? Whatever, whatever, I need a job.
Speaker 1: Yeah. But see, this is the great part is you
Speaker 1: know we're playing a what if so you get to
Speaker 1: pick whatever position.
Speaker 2: Whatever.
Speaker 5: At this point, probably just needs to live in Trump's cabinet,
Speaker 5: not even a questions a place to go, and.
Speaker 7: We're not talking about the cabinet of guys. I'm actually
Speaker 7: I would live in a cabinet in a kitchen just
Speaker 7: to get away from my wife because she's really mad
Speaker 7: at me.
Speaker 2: Right now, what.
Speaker 5: About that couch? I sleep on.
Speaker 2: The couch. The couch is very sticky and stinky friendly.
Speaker 7: Okay, in your question, wait, wait to answer your question.
Speaker 7: Let me answer your question. All right, your deep state moron,
Speaker 7: I'm ask this question. That's why I'm hosting you. I
Speaker 7: don't think you are. I don't think you are. I
Speaker 7: think the cabal puts.
Speaker 2: You up to this.
Speaker 7: I do the same people who try to take a
Speaker 7: shot at my president. But hey, whatever position I get,
Speaker 7: I'm gonna need a I'm gonna need an assistant because
Speaker 7: I need to get my girl Olivia job since she's
Speaker 7: on leave. Right now at New York Magazine. So whatever
Speaker 7: position the Great President wants to give me, would be
Speaker 7: an honor to have a job, and it would be
Speaker 7: an honor to serve, and it would be an honor to.
Speaker 2: Be close to Livia every day. Because sexting, sexting her, I'm.
Speaker 1: Not going that far. That's that's not family right now,
Speaker 1: So the the the hour has come as to the
Speaker 1: closing of this segment of the show, and so we're
Speaker 1: going to give each of you.
Speaker 3: Can't coming off of you.
Speaker 1: You're not kicking you off, so you can come back.
Speaker 3: You can't take it from me. You can't take it
Speaker 3: bull wars from me. You're not kicking me out.
Speaker 5: This is my last So this is the last place
Speaker 5: I can go.
Speaker 1: So we're going to give each of you a ninety
Speaker 1: second closing statement here on the Ranch Show. So seeing
Speaker 1: some of the coin flip we never had, I am
Speaker 1: going to pick RFK Junior. You may go first, with
Speaker 1: mister Jones finishing up and your ninety seconds Junior begins.
Speaker 2: Now that's what I say to my wife. I did
Speaker 2: nothing wrong.
Speaker 7: I was texting a friend, just like you text people
Speaker 7: at the Roiary Club.
Speaker 2: To Olivia, I miss you, baby, I love you.
Speaker 7: We will conquer this together, well, Donald Trump, conquer conquer
Speaker 7: the liberal media who's trying to separate us because you know,
Speaker 7: like just for some stupid things like I'm married and
Speaker 7: that I'm forty years older than her. But I miss
Speaker 7: her a lot. And and I don't even know what
Speaker 7: show I'm on right now. Just Alex sent me a
Speaker 7: text and said, come on and be on my show.
Speaker 7: And I thought it was an Info war show. I
Speaker 7: I don't even know who you are, but I think
Speaker 7: that beard looks very Cia.
Speaker 2: There is Maga Miller, if that's your name.
Speaker 5: This is this is gonna be. This is gonna be
Speaker 5: my show after after they take it. I had to
Speaker 5: have a backup plan. So this is this is what
Speaker 5: mister Jones. Your ninety seconds not started. RFK, you have
Speaker 5: fifteen seconds left.
Speaker 2: I got that much time left.
Speaker 5: You know.
Speaker 7: It's hard to talk with my throat and my brain work.
Speaker 7: So I will just say, Olivia, I miss you.
Speaker 2: I miss you.
Speaker 1: Olivia, come to dead, okay and me I'm just gonna
Speaker 1: cut Nope, Okay, enough enough of the jumping jokes or
Speaker 1: whatever physical activity you're doing over there.
Speaker 2: They're not jumping Jacks. I'm grabbing the.
Speaker 1: Buts okay, and now for the final ninety seconds of
Speaker 1: this this show.
Speaker 2: Hey, back up that thing, Hey, Hey, back up that thing.
Speaker 1: Mister Jones. Your ninety second statement begins. Shut your ninety seconds,
Speaker 1: mister Jones begins.
Speaker 2: Now whatever.
Speaker 5: I want to know that for years I've been targeted
Speaker 5: and I've been attacked, and I've been saying that this
Speaker 5: day would eventually come because we only get on here
Speaker 5: and we speak the truth.
Speaker 3: In the world can't handle the truth. And the reason
Speaker 3: the world can't handle.
Speaker 5: The truth is because the people that want to hear
Speaker 5: it are not in positions of power. We have to
Speaker 5: weed out the Great Cabal. We have to weed out
Speaker 5: our political offices of the lizard people. If you freeze
Speaker 5: frame Obama's face at just the right time, you will
Speaker 5: see the slits in his eyes.
Speaker 3: The man is a lizard.
Speaker 5: He always has been.
Speaker 2: Forget whether he's true there, that's very true.
Speaker 5: Forget whether that doesn't That doesn't matter. It doesn't matter
Speaker 5: whether Michelle Obama's a mean or a woman. We just
Speaker 5: need to weed out the lizard people out of our government.
Speaker 5: I'm sick of being having things taken from me. For
Speaker 5: stuff that I did. It doesn't seem fair. We ought
Speaker 5: to have free speech, We ought to have of We
Speaker 5: ought to have places where we can just say anything
Speaker 5: and make billions of dollars and never have to answer
Speaker 5: for the things that we say.
Speaker 3: In Info Wars, was that last.
Speaker 1: Paradi fifteen seconds, Sir.
Speaker 3: Where I could do that? You can't get me over
Speaker 3: here that.
Speaker 1: I it's it's my show right now because the other
Speaker 1: two guys on.
Speaker 5: Here, Elon, please call me, Joe Rogan, please answer my
Speaker 5: text messages, please, please on Hell I thought we were friends.
Speaker 1: And then that is, thankfully the time we have today
Speaker 1: on this episode of the Rancho, I want to thank
Speaker 1: my esteemed guest mister Alex Jones, as well as RFK
Speaker 1: Junior for taking the stops of my other great hosts,
Speaker 1: which I hope come back soon. But again this is
Speaker 1: of the Ranch Show. Again, tune in daily.
Speaker 3: This is the event's cell