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<v Speaker 1>This is well, good evening, folks, And apparently my co

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<v Speaker 1>hosts have gone dark on me or just left. So

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<v Speaker 1>I have made a few phone calls here and there,

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<v Speaker 1>and I am I'm proud to present.

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<v Speaker 2>Whoa what are you?

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<v Speaker 3>Whoa?

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<v Speaker 4>Whoa? Get back out of here, Clark, Get out of here, Clark.

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<v Speaker 4>You don't need to be anywhere near a microphone. You're

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<v Speaker 4>freaking idiot.

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<v Speaker 3>Move move, just moved.

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<v Speaker 1>Apparently one guest is uh not just a second hostile takeover.

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<v Speaker 3>Hang on, I've gotta I've gotta get gotta get everything

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<v Speaker 3>set up here.

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<v Speaker 5>It doesn't make me proud to type what I'm about

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<v Speaker 5>to pray type.

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<v Speaker 3>Glad to be here on the show. To shut up,

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<v Speaker 3>shut up.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, folks, as you can see, we.

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<v Speaker 5>Have uh go back to laughing at fake Glynn backless

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<v Speaker 5>one and only mister Alex Jones infra Wars.

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<v Speaker 1>Mister Jones, thank you for joining us on the Ranch

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<v Speaker 1>Show today.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I'm excited to be here. We've got a lot

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<v Speaker 3>of talk. Name Miller. I just I just have to

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<v Speaker 3>tell you admitment.

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<v Speaker 6>I am being persecuted, and I am being prosecuted unlawfully legally,

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<v Speaker 6>I don't know, but we're gonna make it for it.

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<v Speaker 3>If you'll just go to my website before it gets

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<v Speaker 3>sold and my supplements. It will make you strong, It'll

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<v Speaker 3>make you feel.

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<v Speaker 2>Like a man.

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<v Speaker 1>No, no, sir, Hold on a second, sir. We we

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<v Speaker 1>don't have the contractual agreement to name those websites, so

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<v Speaker 1>please refrain. You may slightly mention them, but until we

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<v Speaker 1>have a contractual agreement, which I don't know if I

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<v Speaker 1>want to do one way now, because.

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<v Speaker 4>We listen, if I'm I'm talking about whatever I want

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<v Speaker 4>to talk about, all right, all right, madam Bill, you're.

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<v Speaker 3>Just gonna have to We're just gonna have to just

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<v Speaker 3>shut up and let me do what I wanted to.

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<v Speaker 3>Who else is here? I don't even know why. Why

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<v Speaker 3>do we even happen?

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<v Speaker 1>Well, because we'd like a three prong approach to all topics.

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<v Speaker 1>So the other person.

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<v Speaker 2>Does somebody say three way?

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<v Speaker 1>This is going downhill really fast, folks. I'm sorry, someone

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<v Speaker 1>get on as as you can see, folks, my first

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<v Speaker 1>guest is the one and only Alex Jones, and my

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<v Speaker 1>other esteemed a guest is R F K JR.

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<v Speaker 2>Macimiller. I gotta tell you something real quick.

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<v Speaker 7>You're you ready, Absolutely, there's an article that came out

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<v Speaker 7>of media said that I grabbed New York Magazine corresponding

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<v Speaker 7>Olivia Newsy's hand during a hike.

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<v Speaker 2>I did not grab her hand. I grabbed her butt.

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<v Speaker 1>Sir, Please, we're trying to keep this family.

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<v Speaker 2>More fake news.

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<v Speaker 1>I grabbed her, Junior. This is a family.

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<v Speaker 2>I got a brain worm. This I'm making families. I

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<v Speaker 2>don't even know the kids. No, no, no, r f K.

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<v Speaker 1>R F kid Junior. Please, this is a family friendly show.

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<v Speaker 1>We got to keep it family friendly. Please refrain from

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<v Speaker 1>speaking about the female's anatomy of where you supposedly may

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<v Speaker 1>have or may have not touched or grabbed.

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<v Speaker 7>Well, I'm just trying to collect the fake or correct

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<v Speaker 7>the fake news because he said allegedly, I grabbed New

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<v Speaker 7>York Magazines correspondent to Olivia Newsy's hand. I did not

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<v Speaker 7>grab her hand.

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<v Speaker 2>I grabbed her butt.

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<v Speaker 1>Just stop stop with the hand, stop at the hand, sir.

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<v Speaker 2>So all right, let's talk about three ways. Oh no, okay,

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<v Speaker 2>Olivia Newsy is a lizard person.

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<v Speaker 7>She's part of the deep state. I know I Alex I.

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<v Speaker 2>Made a mistake.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, well, so.

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<v Speaker 5>Than to get involved with the media, s r FK

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<v Speaker 5>I loved you one time, and you you've just went

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<v Speaker 5>off in the deep end. At this point, I really

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<v Speaker 5>am disappointed in the decisions that show I have.

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<v Speaker 1>I have a question that never never.

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<v Speaker 7>Sends spicy messages to somebody of the deep space.

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<v Speaker 2>Just the brain worm was feeding. Brain worm was feeding.

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<v Speaker 1>Sorry, but but now I'm the lone host of the rancho.

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<v Speaker 1>Right now I get to ask the questions. So my

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<v Speaker 1>first question, and it's kind of a debate debate for him,

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<v Speaker 1>and we're gonna start with mister mister Jones first. But

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<v Speaker 1>the question is to both of you, So RFK be listening,

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<v Speaker 1>Who out of the two of you is the healthier one.

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<v Speaker 5>Well, clearly you look at me, and while I may

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<v Speaker 5>not be a typical body style, I have wrestled a

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<v Speaker 5>bear before.

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<v Speaker 1>Junior, Junior, this is not your time, your time, Jones, please, it.

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<v Speaker 2>Was It was.

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<v Speaker 5>It was a grizzly bear and I you know, we

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<v Speaker 5>and we fought, and it was it was a great battle.

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<v Speaker 5>It shouldn't it should have been a book made out

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<v Speaker 5>about it. That's that's what I should sell next on

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<v Speaker 5>the side to help pay for these legal phases.

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<v Speaker 3>The book of My Fight between Me and the grizzly bear.

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<v Speaker 5>And so while r f K may look may look

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<v Speaker 5>good for his age, I can tell you right now,

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<v Speaker 5>if we were to get in a fight, I would

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<v Speaker 5>absolutely rip that man limb from limb, There's no doubt

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<v Speaker 5>about it.

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<v Speaker 3>And then I would feast on his flesh.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh okay, so thank you, thank you again. Family friendly,

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<v Speaker 1>family friendly. Here where let's let's refrain from speaking of

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<v Speaker 1>ripping flesh off of our other people.

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<v Speaker 2>R f K, why don't you I didn't grab her hand.

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<v Speaker 3>I wish that's right?

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, r f K.

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<v Speaker 7>How do we know this is even I'm in the

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<v Speaker 7>dark because I'm hiding from my wife because you found

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<v Speaker 7>out I touched the kaboo.

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<v Speaker 1>I can take that. I can take that answer. Okay.

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<v Speaker 1>So mister r f K June your god, please please

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<v Speaker 1>tell us why you believe that you are the healthier

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<v Speaker 1>of the two guests right now.

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<v Speaker 2>Well, look at me.

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<v Speaker 7>I don't look like I eat Arby's every day. Here

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<v Speaker 7>I'll show you how healthy I am.

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<v Speaker 2>You're ready? Ready? Here we go? One, two, three?

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<v Speaker 1>Mister what what are you doing? Are you doing? Jumping Jack's? Okay?

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<v Speaker 1>Moving on, moving on that next question. We're gonna start

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<v Speaker 1>with mister r f K JR. Okay, so mister r

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<v Speaker 1>f k.

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<v Speaker 7>Hey, listen, listen, Maga Miller. I gotta tell you something

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<v Speaker 7>you cannot divide. You can't divide me and Alex Jones

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<v Speaker 7>in a in a petty little deep state, uh, the

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<v Speaker 7>battle of who's stronger.

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<v Speaker 2>Because I'll tell you why. We are brothers against the

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<v Speaker 2>deep space after our children, Maga Miller.

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<v Speaker 5>They're coming after our children after you, not against these

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<v Speaker 5>people because they want our kids and they want my website.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, mister k here's the next question. Between the two

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<v Speaker 1>of you, who has had more conspiracy theories become conspiracy effects.

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<v Speaker 3>Well that was clear.

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<v Speaker 2>I was gonna say, I think that's Alex Jones. That's Alex.

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<v Speaker 7>I probably I probably could remember all the conspiracy theories

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<v Speaker 7>over my lifetime, but between angry wives and brain worms,

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<v Speaker 7>I kind of forget things. So we're gonna say, we're

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<v Speaker 7>gonna we're gonna say, my good friend there, Alex Jones

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<v Speaker 7>of Texas.

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<v Speaker 5>All right, every everything, everything is a conspiracy, Nate Miller.

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<v Speaker 5>And when you think everything is a conspiracy, something that's

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<v Speaker 5>gonna stick.

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<v Speaker 7>Every once in a while, here you want to hear

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<v Speaker 7>some more Alex, I know you'll like this.

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<v Speaker 2>Cheer me on, Alex.

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<v Speaker 5>One stop you can keep going.

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<v Speaker 1>Please stop. This is a family friendly word sounds just so.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey, hey, hey, hey magamilla. Let me tell you something.

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<v Speaker 7>I know this is a family friendly show because I

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<v Speaker 7>even tell my wife that these women are just friends.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, So okay, we're gonna play a little uh wishful thinking. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>that's the game which will think.

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<v Speaker 3>Could you take off your son blasses Macanmillar? I want

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<v Speaker 3>to know if I could trust.

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<v Speaker 1>You can trust me?

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<v Speaker 2>Lizard eyes?

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<v Speaker 1>Do you have lizard I don't have lizard eyes.

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<v Speaker 2>Do you have a brain worm?

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<v Speaker 1>No? I barely have a brain to have a brain work,

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<v Speaker 1>so I don't have a brain worm. Okay, so.

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<v Speaker 3>We're an important thing you said all night?

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<v Speaker 1>My word, thank you, sir.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't like this. I don't like this deep state agent.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm against the Deep States buffoons anyway. Okay, so that's.

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<v Speaker 7>Okay, mister say would say you think the deep state

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<v Speaker 7>is gonna say Hi, I'm with the deep State.

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<v Speaker 2>Nice to meet.

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<v Speaker 7>I don't belong to They're gonna they're gonna tell you

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<v Speaker 7>I I don't like the deep State, but really they do.

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<v Speaker 2>And I'm wondering that about you.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, mister Jones, open your eyes or they're all around us.

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<v Speaker 1>If Donald J. Trump were to win the president.

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<v Speaker 2>Forget what I said six months ago about him. I'm

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<v Speaker 2>talking about today.

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<v Speaker 1>That's why I'm talking to mister Jones, Junior. Shut up.

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<v Speaker 2>He showed he told me.

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<v Speaker 1>Shut up, Jones.

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<v Speaker 7>He showed me how to do jumping. Jackson, you would

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<v Speaker 7>call on two. That was all Donnie right there. He's

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<v Speaker 7>showed me that.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, Jones. If President Trump were to be reinstated or

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<v Speaker 1>or won the election, this.

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<v Speaker 2>Qu when when your deep state hack?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, when he went when he wins in November, If

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<v Speaker 1>you had your pick of position in his cabinet, which

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<v Speaker 1>position would you like?

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<v Speaker 2>Jones?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going for Alex Jones. Now, mister Jones, what position that.

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<v Speaker 2>I want to take?

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<v Speaker 7>Any positions so I can get away from my wife

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<v Speaker 7>and closer to Olivia.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, Alex Jones, because your website and everything is being

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<v Speaker 1>sold off. What position would you like in the cabinet

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<v Speaker 1>of a Trump presidency.

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<v Speaker 5>I would lack a new position to be created, and

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<v Speaker 5>I would like it to be named.

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<v Speaker 3>Legal owner of info Wars. So then so that I

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<v Speaker 3>can tell my empirement.

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<v Speaker 5>I just I don't really care about anything but getting

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<v Speaker 5>the truth to people. So yeah, I would just I

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<v Speaker 5>would like him to create a new position called legal owner.

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<v Speaker 3>Of Info Wars forever.

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<v Speaker 5>Any Ways, until he dies, I'll go I'll go back

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<v Speaker 5>to trying to figure out who's a.

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<v Speaker 3>Lizard, who's not a lizard?

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<v Speaker 5>You know what exactly it is they're trying to do

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<v Speaker 5>to our gun sure, the downfall of humanity, this is

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<v Speaker 5>this is what the people want, That's what.

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<v Speaker 2>They want to hear.

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<v Speaker 3>The vast majority of.

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<v Speaker 5>Americans don't believe that what I speak about is conspiracies.

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<v Speaker 2>They believe that.

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<v Speaker 3>When I talk, it is the truth. And I also

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<v Speaker 3>believe that I'm a.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm a little bit of an idiot, though I can't

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<v Speaker 4>have to admit that. But but but what I.

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<v Speaker 5>Have to say is is that leads me down the

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<v Speaker 5>pathway to find things that other people won't find, and

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<v Speaker 5>to dig in places that other people won't dig. Not

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<v Speaker 5>unlike my friend Donald who dug into Laura Loover.

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<v Speaker 1>Family, the Hey why Robert Jr? Same question for you?

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<v Speaker 2>Now?

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<v Speaker 1>When President Trump went in November, what position in his

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<v Speaker 1>cabinet would you like to have or be placed in.

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<v Speaker 1>What position would you like to be placed in in

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<v Speaker 1>the cabinet of a Trump president?

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<v Speaker 2>Yes? Whatever, whatever, I need a job.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah. But see, this is the great part is you

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<v Speaker 1>know we're playing a what if so you get to

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<v Speaker 1>pick whatever position.

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<v Speaker 2>Whatever.

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<v Speaker 5>At this point, probably just needs to live in Trump's cabinet,

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<v Speaker 5>not even a questions a place to go, and.

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<v Speaker 7>We're not talking about the cabinet of guys. I'm actually

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<v Speaker 7>I would live in a cabinet in a kitchen just

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<v Speaker 7>to get away from my wife because she's really mad

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<v Speaker 7>at me.

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<v Speaker 2>Right now, what.

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<v Speaker 5>About that couch? I sleep on.

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<v Speaker 2>The couch. The couch is very sticky and stinky friendly.

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<v Speaker 7>Okay, in your question, wait, wait to answer your question.

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<v Speaker 7>Let me answer your question. All right, your deep state moron,

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<v Speaker 7>I'm ask this question. That's why I'm hosting you. I

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<v Speaker 7>don't think you are. I don't think you are. I

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<v Speaker 7>think the cabal puts.

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<v Speaker 2>You up to this.

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<v Speaker 7>I do the same people who try to take a

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<v Speaker 7>shot at my president. But hey, whatever position I get,

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<v Speaker 7>I'm gonna need a I'm gonna need an assistant because

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<v Speaker 7>I need to get my girl Olivia job since she's

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<v Speaker 7>on leave. Right now at New York Magazine. So whatever

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<v Speaker 7>position the Great President wants to give me, would be

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<v Speaker 7>an honor to have a job, and it would be

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<v Speaker 7>an honor to serve, and it would be an honor to.

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<v Speaker 2>Be close to Livia every day. Because sexting, sexting her, I'm.

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<v Speaker 1>Not going that far. That's that's not family right now,

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<v Speaker 1>So the the the hour has come as to the

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<v Speaker 1>closing of this segment of the show, and so we're

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<v Speaker 1>going to give each of you.

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<v Speaker 3>Can't coming off of you.

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<v Speaker 1>You're not kicking you off, so you can come back.

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<v Speaker 3>You can't take it from me. You can't take it

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<v Speaker 3>bull wars from me. You're not kicking me out.

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<v Speaker 5>This is my last So this is the last place

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<v Speaker 5>I can go.

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<v Speaker 1>So we're going to give each of you a ninety

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<v Speaker 1>second closing statement here on the Ranch Show. So seeing

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<v Speaker 1>some of the coin flip we never had, I am

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<v Speaker 1>going to pick RFK Junior. You may go first, with

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<v Speaker 1>mister Jones finishing up and your ninety seconds Junior begins.

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<v Speaker 2>Now that's what I say to my wife. I did

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<v Speaker 2>nothing wrong.

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<v Speaker 7>I was texting a friend, just like you text people

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<v Speaker 7>at the Roiary Club.

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<v Speaker 2>To Olivia, I miss you, baby, I love you.

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<v Speaker 7>We will conquer this together, well, Donald Trump, conquer conquer

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<v Speaker 7>the liberal media who's trying to separate us because you know,

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<v Speaker 7>like just for some stupid things like I'm married and

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<v Speaker 7>that I'm forty years older than her. But I miss

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<v Speaker 7>her a lot. And and I don't even know what

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<v Speaker 7>show I'm on right now. Just Alex sent me a

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<v Speaker 7>text and said, come on and be on my show.

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<v Speaker 7>And I thought it was an Info war show. I

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<v Speaker 7>I don't even know who you are, but I think

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<v Speaker 7>that beard looks very Cia.

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<v Speaker 2>There is Maga Miller, if that's your name.

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<v Speaker 5>This is this is gonna be. This is gonna be

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<v Speaker 5>my show after after they take it. I had to

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<v Speaker 5>have a backup plan. So this is this is what

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<v Speaker 5>mister Jones. Your ninety seconds not started. RFK, you have

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<v Speaker 5>fifteen seconds left.

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<v Speaker 2>I got that much time left.

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<v Speaker 5>You know.

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<v Speaker 7>It's hard to talk with my throat and my brain work.

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<v Speaker 7>So I will just say, Olivia, I miss you.

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<v Speaker 2>I miss you.

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<v Speaker 1>Olivia, come to dead, okay and me I'm just gonna

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<v Speaker 1>cut Nope, Okay, enough enough of the jumping jokes or

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<v Speaker 1>whatever physical activity you're doing over there.

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<v Speaker 2>They're not jumping Jacks. I'm grabbing the.

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<v Speaker 1>Buts okay, and now for the final ninety seconds of

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<v Speaker 1>this this show.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey, back up that thing, Hey, Hey, back up that thing.

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<v Speaker 1>Mister Jones. Your ninety second statement begins. Shut your ninety seconds,

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<v Speaker 1>mister Jones begins.

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<v Speaker 2>Now whatever.

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<v Speaker 5>I want to know that for years I've been targeted

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<v Speaker 5>and I've been attacked, and I've been saying that this

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<v Speaker 5>day would eventually come because we only get on here

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<v Speaker 5>and we speak the truth.

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<v Speaker 3>In the world can't handle the truth. And the reason

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<v Speaker 3>the world can't handle.

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<v Speaker 5>The truth is because the people that want to hear

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<v Speaker 5>it are not in positions of power. We have to

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<v Speaker 5>weed out the Great Cabal. We have to weed out

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<v Speaker 5>our political offices of the lizard people. If you freeze

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<v Speaker 5>frame Obama's face at just the right time, you will

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<v Speaker 5>see the slits in his eyes.

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<v Speaker 3>The man is a lizard.

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<v Speaker 5>He always has been.

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<v Speaker 2>Forget whether he's true there, that's very true.

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<v Speaker 5>Forget whether that doesn't That doesn't matter. It doesn't matter

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<v Speaker 5>whether Michelle Obama's a mean or a woman. We just

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<v Speaker 5>need to weed out the lizard people out of our government.

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<v Speaker 5>I'm sick of being having things taken from me. For

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<v Speaker 5>stuff that I did. It doesn't seem fair. We ought

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<v Speaker 5>to have free speech, We ought to have of We

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<v Speaker 5>ought to have places where we can just say anything

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<v Speaker 5>and make billions of dollars and never have to answer

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<v Speaker 5>for the things that we say.

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<v Speaker 3>In Info Wars, was that last.

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<v Speaker 1>Paradi fifteen seconds, Sir.

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<v Speaker 3>Where I could do that? You can't get me over

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<v Speaker 3>here that.

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<v Speaker 1>I it's it's my show right now because the other

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<v Speaker 1>two guys on.

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<v Speaker 5>Here, Elon, please call me, Joe Rogan, please answer my

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<v Speaker 5>text messages, please, please on Hell I thought we were friends.

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<v Speaker 1>And then that is, thankfully the time we have today

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<v Speaker 1>on this episode of the Rancho, I want to thank

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<v Speaker 1>my esteemed guest mister Alex Jones, as well as RFK

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<v Speaker 1>Junior for taking the stops of my other great hosts,

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<v Speaker 1>which I hope come back soon. But again this is

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<v Speaker 1>of the Ranch Show. Again, tune in daily.

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<v Speaker 3>This is the event's cell