Speaker 1: Many people think that happiness is simply a matter of luck.
Speaker 1: And they think if you're happy, you're just lucky. You
Speaker 1: got lucky, you had happy circumstances, and so congratulations for you.
Speaker 1: But actually, happiness can be learned. It is a quality
Speaker 1: that you can learn. There are certain qualities that if
Speaker 1: you learn them, your happiness in life is going to
Speaker 1: go up exponentially. If you don't have these qualities in
Speaker 1: your life, your unhappiness will go up exponentially. Now, you
Speaker 1: probably never thought about this, but if I mention it
Speaker 1: to you, you automatically know what I'm talking about because
Speaker 1: you could instinctively pick out qualities that cause you to
Speaker 1: be happy and qualities that cause you to be unhappy.
Speaker 2: For instance, if we made two columns, the.
Speaker 1: Happiness column and the unhappiness column, and I said, now,
Speaker 1: which column would impatience go in? Unhappiness, yeah. Impatient people
Speaker 1: tend to be unhappy people.
Speaker 2: Would you agree with that?
Speaker 1: And the more patient you are, if you learn patience,
Speaker 1: you're gonna be happier in life. That obviously makes sense.
Speaker 1: If I said, for instance, cruelty, that would go in
Speaker 1: the unhappiness column. Kindness would go in the happiness column.
Speaker 1: This is kind of obvious and we could make an
Speaker 1: entire list. If I said, if I'm arrogant, I'm going
Speaker 1: to tend to be unhappy. And if I am humble,
Speaker 1: I'm going to tend to be more happy. So what
Speaker 1: we're going to do this weekend as we go through
Speaker 1: the book of Philippians is look at four very important
Speaker 1: qualities you need to build within your life. Now, happiness
Speaker 1: is a serious business. And if you really want to
Speaker 1: be happy, then you need to build these qualities in
Speaker 1: your life. We're starting in chapter two of Philippians, verses
Speaker 1: 19 down to verse 30. Let me read it to
Speaker 1: you and then we'll look at it. Paul says this,
Speaker 1: I hope in the Lord Jesus to send Timothy to
Speaker 1: you soon. Now, let me stop here and remind you
Speaker 1: the background. Paul is in prison in Rome. He's writing
Speaker 1: a letter to a church in Greece in a city
Speaker 1: called Philippi. So we call it the Philippian letter. Paul
Speaker 1: is writing to these church members of a church he
Speaker 1: started in Greece and they have been sending him care packages.
Speaker 1: They've been, they actually send him an offering while he
Speaker 1: was in prison, waiting to appeal his execution before Caesar,
Speaker 1: who was Nero in Rome at the time. And, uh,
Speaker 1: Paul is writing back to the Philippians and this book
Speaker 1: is actually a thank you letter. It is a thank
Speaker 1: you letter for a financial gift. And in the middle
Speaker 1: of this letter, he gives some personal information. So let
Speaker 1: me read it again. I hope in the Lord Jesus
Speaker 1: to send Timothy to you soon so that I may
Speaker 1: be cheered when I receive news about you. I have
Speaker 1: no one else like him, this is Timothy, who takes
Speaker 1: a genuine interest in your welfare. For everybody else looks
Speaker 1: after his own interest, not those of Jesus Christ. But
Speaker 1: you know that Timothy has proved himself because as a
Speaker 1: son with his father, he has served with me in
Speaker 1: the work of the gospel, the good news. I hope
Speaker 1: therefore to send him, Timothy, as soon as I can
Speaker 1: see how things go with me. And I'm confident that
Speaker 1: I myself will come soon. In other words, I hope
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get out of jail and come back to
Speaker 1: see you in Philippi. But he says, I think it
Speaker 1: is necessary to also send back to you Epaphroditus. That's
Speaker 1: a long Greek name for a man, but that's another
Speaker 1: guy like Timothy. Epaphroditus, my brother, my fellow worker, and
Speaker 1: my fellow soldier, who is also your messenger, whom you
Speaker 1: sent to me to take care of my needs. When
Speaker 1: the Philippians sent a financial gift to help Paul while
Speaker 1: he was in prison in Rome, they sent it to
Speaker 1: a guy named Epaphroditus. And he says, I'm gonna send
Speaker 1: this guy back to you. for he longs for all
Speaker 1: of you. Because this was his home church. And he's
Speaker 1: distressed because you heard he was ill. Indeed, he was
Speaker 1: ill and he almost died in trying to get to
Speaker 1: Paul on that trip to Rome. But God had mercy
Speaker 1: on him and not only on him, but also on
Speaker 1: me to spare me sorrow upon sorrow. Therefore, I am
Speaker 1: all the more eager to send him back to you
Speaker 1: so that when you see him again, you may be
Speaker 1: glad and I may have less anxiety. So, welcome him
Speaker 1: in the Lord with great joy, and honor men like him,
Speaker 1: because he almost died for the work of Christ, risking
Speaker 1: his life to make up for the help you could
Speaker 1: not give me. Now, when I read that passage at
Speaker 1: a first glance, that doesn't seem to be a very
Speaker 1: deep passage. You're going, it sounds like Paul's talking about
Speaker 1: two guys who are with him.
Speaker 2: In Rome that he's going to send back to Greece.
Speaker 1: And when you read this letter, you might ask, why
Speaker 1: in the world did God include that in the Bible?
Speaker 2: I mean, why is that even there?
Speaker 1: It's just a personal note about two guys, the church
Speaker 1: that the Philippi knows and that Paul knows, and they've
Speaker 1: helped each other. And you might think, you know, this
Speaker 1: is one of those passages in the Bible, just kind
Speaker 1: of read over real quick.
Speaker 2: And just get to the good parts. And you would
Speaker 2: be wrong.
Speaker 1: You would be wrong. Because the Bible says everything in
Speaker 1: the Bible is there to teach us by example. And
Speaker 1: in this passage that I just read you are the
Speaker 1: examples of the four things you must build into your
Speaker 1: life if you want to really be happy, if you
Speaker 1: want to live consistently happy. Now, he has an example
Speaker 1: of these four choices that leads to happiness in these
Speaker 1: two guys named Timothy and Epaphroditus.
Speaker 2: Now, here's the background.
Speaker 1: Paul intends to send two guys who were with him
Speaker 1: in Rome while he's there in prison back to the
Speaker 1: Philippian church. And he says in verse 19, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: send you Timothy. And in verse 25, he says, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna send back to you Epaphroditus, who's a.
Speaker 2: Member of your church.
Speaker 1: And then Paul endorses these two guys as role models.
Speaker 1: He says in verse 20, of Timothy, I got nobody
Speaker 1: else like him.
Speaker 2: Now let me just stop right there for a minute.
Speaker 1: If Paul, the apostle who wrote most of the New
Speaker 1: Testament says, I don't know anybody like him in the
Speaker 1: whole world, you better.
Speaker 2: Pay attention to this guy.
Speaker 1: When Paul says, I don't have anybody in my life
Speaker 1: like Timothy, then you better pay attention to him. In fact,
Speaker 1: two of the books of the Bible are called 1
Speaker 1: and 2 Timothy written to this guy. So he's a
Speaker 1: very important character. He says, I don't know anybody like him.
Speaker 1: And then he says about the other guy, Epaphroditus, he says,
Speaker 1: I want you to welcome him when I send him
Speaker 1: and honor him because he nearly died.
Speaker 2: He nearly died for my sake.
Speaker 1: Now, Paul says, and here's the reason why we're looking
Speaker 1: at it in this series on the habits of happiness.
Speaker 1: Paul says, I'm gonna send these guys to you for
Speaker 1: three reasons. And he says this. He said in verse 19,
Speaker 1: so that I may be cheered, so that I can
Speaker 1: be happy. And then in verse 28 he says, so
Speaker 1: that you may be happy, so you may be glad,
Speaker 1: you may be happy. And then he says in verse 28,
Speaker 1: so that I may have less anxiety. So whatever these
Speaker 1: guys are doing, however they are living, it's a way
Speaker 1: that's gonna make you glad, it's gonna make me glad,
Speaker 1: and it's gonna make us all.
Speaker 2: Have less anxiety.
Speaker 1: Now as your pastor, I want you to be happy,
Speaker 1: I want me to be happy, and I want us
Speaker 1: all to have less anxiety.
Speaker 2: So we're gonna look at this passage. Does that make sense?
Speaker 1: And we're gonna say, what is it about these two
Speaker 1: guys that are so worthy? They're in the Bible in
Speaker 1: a little footnote that looks like kind of like just
Speaker 1: a personal, hey, I'm sending these guys. He says in
Speaker 1: the Living Bible, these guys will make me happy and
Speaker 1: lighten my cares. Now what this passage teaches us is
Speaker 1: that there are four qualities you need to have in
Speaker 1: your life in order for your happiness to go up
Speaker 1: and for the happiness of people around you to go
Speaker 1: up to. And the first thing that you have to
Speaker 1: learn is this. You're gonna have to learn, write this down,
Speaker 1: to shift the focus away from myself. That is the
Speaker 1: starting point for all happiness. I must shift the focus
Speaker 1: away from myself. I have to care about more than
Speaker 1: just me. I've gotta care about the needs of those
Speaker 1: around me.
Speaker 1:
Speaker 1: If I truly want
Speaker 1: to be happy in life, I've got to move the
Speaker 1: focus off myself. Now, Paul gives Timothy as an example
Speaker 1: of this. In verse 20 and 21, he says this.
Speaker 1: I have nobody else like him who takes a genuine
Speaker 1: interest in your welfare for everybody else looks out for.
Speaker 2: His own interest. Would you say that's true today of
Speaker 2: most people?
Speaker 1: Everybody looks out for their own interest? Not that many
Speaker 1: people are looking after your interest. Could you name the
Speaker 1: people who are looking after your interest? Not many. Most
Speaker 1: people are looking after their own interest, not yours. And
Speaker 1: as naturally, I tend to look at my own interest.
Speaker 1: I don't tend to look at your interest. I don't
Speaker 1: get up in the morning and think, hmm, I wonder
Speaker 1: if you're having a hard time today. No, I'm always
Speaker 1: thinking about me. You tend to think about you. Paul says,
Speaker 1: I've got nobody like this guy because he actually takes
Speaker 1: a genuine interest in you, not simply in himself. Everybody
Speaker 1: else looks out for his own interest. And notice in
Speaker 1: that phrase, there, he says, no one else, no one
Speaker 1: else is like, in other words, unselfish people are very,
Speaker 1: very rare. Nobody else is like him. He says, who
Speaker 1: takes a genuine interest. There are many people who fake
Speaker 1: interest in you, It's so funny, sometimes I go to
Speaker 1: these parties or these important diplomatic events and people are
Speaker 1: standing there talking to you and they've got one of
Speaker 1: these little, you know, toaster things and a drink in
Speaker 1: their hand. And they're talking to you, but the whole
Speaker 1: time they're looking over your shoulder like, is there anybody
Speaker 1: else more important I should be talking to? They're pretending
Speaker 1: to take an interest in me, but they're not really
Speaker 1: interested in me. They're looking over, who else could I
Speaker 1: talk to instead of this guy? because they're pretending that.
Speaker 1: He says, he takes a genuine interest. Good News translation says,
Speaker 1: he genuinely cares about you. Others care only about themselves.
Speaker 1: And then I want you to circle the phrase, it says,
Speaker 1: looks out. Everyone else looks out for his own interest.
Speaker 1: Circle that phrase, looks out. What we're talking about here
Speaker 1: is a matter of focus. The first key to happiness
Speaker 1: is you gotta change your focus. You have to shift
Speaker 1: your focus away from yourself onto other people.
Speaker 2: You gotta look out for others. Now, do you normally
Speaker 2: do that?
Speaker 1: Not normally. That's something you have to learn to do.
Speaker 1: When you walk into a room, you're not normally thinking,
Speaker 1: who in this room needs my help? You walk into
Speaker 1: the room, look in and think, how do I look?
Speaker 1: That's what you do. You walk in the room and go,
Speaker 1: how do I look? Am I put together just right?
Speaker 1: And you have to intentionally train yourself to do the opposite,
Speaker 1: to shift the focus away from myself. The Phillips translation
Speaker 1: of this verse says, people aren't interested in you. They're
Speaker 1: all wrapped up in their own affairs. Circle that phrase,
Speaker 1: wrapped up. For those of you who are single adults,
Speaker 1: let me just give you a little fatherly advice. It's
Speaker 1: better to sit at home without a date, then go
Speaker 1: date somebody who's all wrapped up in themselves. Single women,
Speaker 1: a man wrapped up in himself is no gift. Guys,
Speaker 1: a woman wrapped up in herself is no gift. He says,
Speaker 1: they're wrapped up in their own affairs, so they're not caring.
Speaker 1: They're not looking out for the needs of others. Now,
Speaker 1: I think confession's good for the soul. I have to
Speaker 1: admit to you that it saddens me how many times
Speaker 1: I have missed the needs around me of people that
Speaker 1: I love. I just totally missed them because I wasn't
Speaker 1: paying attention. I just wasn't paying attention. I wasn't looking out.
Speaker 1: I hadn't shifted the focus from me to the others
Speaker 1: in the room. And when I wasn't looking out for
Speaker 1: their needs, I missed their needs. And that grieves me
Speaker 1: a lot Philippians 2, 4, we looked at this verse
Speaker 1: last week, but I love it in the message paraphrase.
Speaker 1: It says here, don't be so obsessed with getting your
Speaker 1: own advantage. Forget yourself long enough to lend a helping hand.
Speaker 1: If you did that, you think you'd be happier? Yes,
Speaker 1: you would. Yes, you would. You see, this isn't easy
Speaker 1: to do because everything in our culture and everything in
Speaker 1: our nature teaches us to be self-centered. And America is
Speaker 1: becoming more and more self-centered. I read a report this
Speaker 1: week in a psychology, a scientific journal that said they
Speaker 1: studied 1 million books in print over the last 200
Speaker 1: years in American history. And they compared the words that
Speaker 1: were used then and the words that are used now.
Speaker 1: And the words that have increased in number today are I, me, my, choice, unique,
Speaker 1: These words are being overused today. Words you don't hear
Speaker 1: much today are responsibility and prayer. Okay, those are words
Speaker 1: that were used a lot in the past. We're increasingly
Speaker 1: becoming more self-centered. Number two, the second thing you're gonna
Speaker 1: need to learn to be happy is this. If you
Speaker 1: wanna be happy, you're gonna have to become someone that
Speaker 1: people trust. You're going to have to become someone that
Speaker 1: people trust. Proverbs 13, 15 says, those who can't be
Speaker 1: trusted are on the road to ruin. Now, it's really
Speaker 1: obvious that the more people trust you, the happier you're
Speaker 1: gonna be. And if people don't trust you, you're not
Speaker 1: gonna be happy. If nobody trusts you, you're living a
Speaker 1: pretty miserable life. So, Here's another quality you can learn.
Speaker 1: If you learn to be trustworthy, you learn to be reliable,
Speaker 1: you learn to be consistent, you learn to be dependable,
Speaker 1: and you develop that quality in your life, you're gonna
Speaker 1: be a whole lot happier than people who aren't worthy
Speaker 1: of trust. If you want to be happy, you've got
Speaker 1: to become somebody that people trust. Now again, Paul uses
Speaker 1: Timothy as an example of this. Verse 22. He says,
Speaker 1: Timothy has proven himself because as a son with his father,
Speaker 1: he served with me in the work of the gospel. Now, again,
Speaker 1: he's giving this guy as an example. He says, I've
Speaker 1: watched this guy in action. I've seen this Timothy. I've
Speaker 1: seen him in all kinds of circumstances. And he says,
Speaker 1: this guy, Timothy, he's the real deal. He's the real McCoy.
Speaker 1: He's authentic. He's genuine. He's reliable. You can count on
Speaker 1: this guy. God's word translation says, you know what kind
Speaker 1: of person Timothy proved to be. Do people know what
Speaker 1: kind of person you really are? And are you trustworthy?
Speaker 1: If you're not, then you're not very happy because the
Speaker 1: more people trust you, the more your happiness goes up.
Speaker 1: Now he says about this guy, Timothy, he's proven trustworthy.
Speaker 1: He has been proven. He has been proved over time, tested, verified,
Speaker 1: checked out.
Speaker 2: He is credible. He is creditable.
Speaker 1: You know, anytime you go to a bank for a loan,
Speaker 1: before they loan you any money, they're going to do
Speaker 1: a thing on you called a credit check, a credit check.
Speaker 1: And they're gonna say, are you worthy of being trusted
Speaker 1: with credit? Are you creditable? Do you pay your bills back?
Speaker 1: Are you paying them back on time? Do you have
Speaker 1: a track record of keeping your word? Do you have
Speaker 1: a track record of doing what you say? Can you
Speaker 1: be dependent on that if we loan you this money,
Speaker 1: you're not gonna flake out on us and we're gonna
Speaker 1: lose it. They do a credit check on you to
Speaker 1: see if you are credible or credit worthy. Now I
Speaker 1: want to tell you a little secret. Everybody around you
Speaker 1: is doing a credit check on your life every moment
Speaker 1: of your life. Not just the banks, but everybody around
Speaker 1: you is constantly doing a credit check on you. Are
Speaker 1: you what you say you are? Are you the real deal?
Speaker 1: Or are you just some phony baloney, you wear a
Speaker 1: mask here and wear a mask over here? You know,
Speaker 1: that's what they used to do in the Greek theater.
Speaker 1: One actor would play many parts and he'd come out
Speaker 1: and he'd wear a mask and he'd play a part,
Speaker 1: and then he'd go back behind the stage.
Speaker 2: This is in the days of Plato.
Speaker 1: He'd get another mask, he'd come out, and he'd wear
Speaker 1: that mask, and he'd play a part, and he'd go back.
Speaker 1: And so he's wearing, he's being different roles to different
Speaker 1: groups of people, playing different parts. Same guy, but wearing
Speaker 1: different masks. And the word for that guy in Greek
Speaker 1: is called a hypocritos. That's where we get the word hypocrite.
Speaker 1: Hypocrite means somebody who he acts this way on the
Speaker 1: golf course and this way with his kids and this
Speaker 1: way at church and that way with his wife. And
Speaker 1: you don't really know. It's what you see, what you get.
Speaker 1: He's saying, you know the kind of person Timothy was.
Speaker 1: He proved, he was checked out. He got a credit
Speaker 1: reference done. Now, if you're gonna be happy, you gotta
Speaker 1: learn to be consistent. You gotta learn to be dependable, trustworthy, reliable.
Speaker 1: How do you develop a reputation for reliability. Two things,
Speaker 1: write them down. The Bible tells us. Number one, live
Speaker 1: with integrity. Live with integrity. And what I mean by
Speaker 1: that is make sure that my actions match my words.
Speaker 1: I don't talk a good game and then live another
Speaker 1: different way. No, he says, what you see is what
Speaker 1: you get. Integrity doesn't mean you're perfect. If perfection was
Speaker 1: required for integrity, none of us have integrity because nobody's perfect.
Speaker 1: We're all flawed. But integrity means what you see is
Speaker 1: what you get. It's the real deal. Make sure my
Speaker 1: actions match my words. Proverbs 25, 13 says this, reliable
Speaker 1: friends who do what they say are like cool drinks
Speaker 1: in sweltering heat, refreshing.
Speaker 2: Isn't that a great verse?
Speaker 1: Can people count on you? Do you flip-flop? Are you two-faced?
Speaker 1: You're wishy-washy. Look at the opposite. Proverbs 25, 19 says this.
Speaker 1: Putting confidence in an unreliable person is like chewing with
Speaker 1: a toothache or walking on a broken foot.
Speaker 2: I like that. What is he saying?
Speaker 1: The greatest ability is dependability. It's more important than any
Speaker 1: other ability in life. The greatest ability is dependability. Are
Speaker 1: you dependable? Are you credit worthy? Are you worthy of trust?
Speaker 1: If you are, then you're going to be a happy
Speaker 1: person because the more people who trust in you, the
Speaker 1: more happy you're going to be. The greatest ability is dependability.
Speaker 1: Proverbs 28, 20 says, honest people will lead a full,
Speaker 1: happy life. You wanna be happy? Honest people will lead
Speaker 1: a full, happy life. Number two, not only do I
Speaker 1: live with integrity, I keep my promises. This is the
Speaker 1: other way you learn this second quality, keep my promises.
Speaker 1: Psalm 15, four talks about, these people always do what
Speaker 1: they promise, no matter how much it may cost them.
Speaker 1: I actually like this verse better in the King James
Speaker 1: English where it says, God blesses the person who sweareth
Speaker 1: to his own hurt. Sweareth to his own, what does
Speaker 1: that mean? He means you keep a promise and then
Speaker 1: you find out it's gonna cost me more than I
Speaker 1: thought it was gonna cost me, but I still keep
Speaker 1: my promise. I said I'd do it for that price
Speaker 1: and I'm gonna take a bath on it, but I'm
Speaker 1: gonna do it because I keep my word. and I'm
Speaker 1: gonna keep my promise no matter how much it costs. So,
Speaker 1: if I want to be happy, then I've gotta first
Speaker 1: shift the focus away from myself, it's not about me,
Speaker 1: and second, I've got to become somebody that people trust,
Speaker 1: and we see those from Timothy. Now, Paul is a superstar.
Speaker 1: I mean, this is the guy who wrote most of
Speaker 1: the New Testament part of the Bible. Paul is a superstar,
Speaker 1: yet Paul knows that we get more done by working together.
Speaker 1: So here's the third skill that you gotta learn in
Speaker 1: order to be happy in life, and that is this.
Speaker 1: Number three, learn how to work well with others. And
Speaker 1: you know what? They don't teach you that anymore. And
Speaker 1: if parents don't teach their kids this, they may not
Speaker 1: learn it in school, You must learn how to work well.
Speaker 1: By the way, parents, these are four things you need
Speaker 1: to teach your kids. If you want your kids to
Speaker 1: be happy, they've got to learn to switch the focus
Speaker 1: away from themselves. They've got to learn to become someone
Speaker 1: that is trustworthy, and they've got to learn how to
Speaker 1: work well with others. What am I talking about here?
Speaker 1: I'm talking about the skill of being a team member,
Speaker 1: the skill of collaboration, the skill of working together. If
Speaker 1: you don't know how to work with other people, you're
Speaker 1: gonna be unhappy much in your life. Well, what do
Speaker 1: I need to learn in order to work with other people?
Speaker 1: You need to learn two things, the Bible says. Write
Speaker 1: these down. First, learn to cooperate. I need to learn
Speaker 1: how to cooperate. And that's not something you automatically do.
Speaker 1: That's one of the goals of parenting, is teaching your
Speaker 1: children how to share their toys. teaching your children how
Speaker 1: to put away the toys together, teaching your children how
Speaker 1: to cooperate often with people who are very different in personality.
Speaker 2: Learn to cooperate.
Speaker 1: And Paul gives the second guy, Epaphroditus, as an example
Speaker 1: of this quality.
Speaker 2: In verse 25, he.
Speaker 1: Says this, I send back to you, Epaphroditus, my brother,
Speaker 1: my fellow worker and my fellow soldier. Circle those three terms,
Speaker 1: we're gonna come back to it. Brother, fellow worker, and
Speaker 1: fellow soldier. Who is also your messenger, whom you sent
Speaker 1: to take care of my needs. Remember, this is the
Speaker 1: guy that the church in Philippi sent with an offering,
Speaker 1: a gift of money, financial support, to help Paul while
Speaker 1: he was in prison in Rome. Paul says, he's my brother,
Speaker 1: my fellow worker, my fellow soldier, he's worked and fought
Speaker 1: by my side. What is Paul Singer? This guy knows
Speaker 1: how to be a team member. This guy knows how
Speaker 1: to work in a group. He's not a lone ranger.
Speaker 1: He's not a prima donna. He's not a maverick. This
Speaker 1: is a guy who knows how to work with other people. Now,
Speaker 1: I just want to tell you real seriously, the better
Speaker 1: you learn this skill, the happier you're going to be
Speaker 1: in life. If you don't know how to work with
Speaker 1: people different from you, you're in deep, deep guacamole. Because
Speaker 1: let me tell you something, most of the world is
Speaker 1: different from you. And if you don't know how to
Speaker 1: work with people who are different from you, then you
Speaker 1: just shut yourself off.
Speaker 2: To most of the world.
Speaker 1: Now Paul uses here in this passage three relational metaphors.
Speaker 1: They're teamwork terms. And he says, my brother, my fellow worker,
Speaker 1: and my fellow soldier.
Speaker 2: What is he saying? He's saying that life.
Speaker 1: and ministry. Life is a family, it's a fellowship, and
Speaker 1: it's a fight. It's a family, it's a fellowship, and
Speaker 1: it's a fight. It's family, he says, he calls him
Speaker 1: my brother. The church is the family of God. That
Speaker 1: means every one of you are related to each other.
Speaker 1: If you know the Lord, the people you're sitting next
Speaker 1: to are your brothers and sisters. In fact, for thousands
Speaker 1: of years, when people went to church, they used to
Speaker 1: call each other brother and sister. Brother so-and-so, brother Bob,
Speaker 1: sister Sue, brother Tom, sister Janice. Maybe we ought to
Speaker 1: bring that back because we've kind of lost the attitude
Speaker 1: of we are family. 133 times in the Bible, God
Speaker 1: uses family terms to refer to the church. So we're
Speaker 1: a family, he says, my brother. Then he says, we're
Speaker 1: a fellowship, a fellow worker. We're to work together, we're
Speaker 1: to serve together. We've been given the same tasks. We
Speaker 1: have the same great commission. We have the same common goal.
Speaker 1: We're a family, we're a fellowship, and we're a fight.
Speaker 1: He says, my fellow soldier. Would you agree that life's
Speaker 1: a battle? Would you agree that sometimes you feel like
Speaker 1: you're at war? Yeah.
Speaker 2: And that forces are against you?
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well, he says, you know what? It's a battle.
Speaker 1: We all have the same enemy, Satan, and we need
Speaker 1: to support each other. We need to defend each other.
Speaker 1: We need to encourage each other. And there's a word
Speaker 1: for that. It's called small groups. Where do I learn
Speaker 1: to be a family, a fellowship, and to fight for
Speaker 1: each other? In a small group. You don't learn it
Speaker 1: in a big meeting like this. You learn it in
Speaker 1: a small group. We support and we defend and we
Speaker 1: encourage each other. I love what Jesus said. I love
Speaker 1: this message paraphrase of one of the Beatitudes. Jesus said,
Speaker 1: you're blessed when you can show people how to cooperate
Speaker 1: instead of compete or fight.
Speaker 2: Why?
Speaker 1: If you learn to cooperate with others, your happiness is
Speaker 1: gonna go up exponentially. Now, not only do I need
Speaker 1: to learn to cooperate, here's a second one. I need
Speaker 1: to learn to be considerate. The more considerate you are
Speaker 1: of other people in life, the happier you're going to be.
Speaker 1: The more inconsiderate you are of people in your life,
Speaker 1: including clerks and people who serve you at fast food places,
Speaker 1: the more inconsiderate you are of waiters and waitresses and
Speaker 1: people who serve you, the more unhappy you're going to be.
Speaker 1: When you see somebody in a restaurant being inconsiderate to
Speaker 1: a waiter or waitress, at that point, are they being happy? No,
Speaker 1: they are not. They are unhappy. Because those two things
Speaker 1: don't go together. And he's saying, Paul's saying, you gotta
Speaker 1: learn to be thoughtful. You gotta learn to be kind, sympathetic,
Speaker 1: and understanding of others. And again, he gives Epaphroditus as
Speaker 1: an example. Verse 26 there in your outline. He says,
Speaker 1: now I must send him, that's Epaphroditus, I must send
Speaker 1: him back to you because he longs to see all
Speaker 1: of you.
Speaker 2: And he's been worried about your distress. That's called consideration.
Speaker 1: He's worried about, not his distress, worried about your distress
Speaker 1: since you heard that he was sick. Now notice in
Speaker 1: this verse, we see two examples of consideration. Paul is
Speaker 1: considerate of his coworker's concern. And he said, Epaphroditus really,
Speaker 1: he's homesick. He wants to come back home. He longs
Speaker 1: to see you. Paul is considerate of his coworkers' concern,
Speaker 1: and Epaphroditus is considerate of the Philippians' concern. They had
Speaker 1: heard that Epaphroditus on the way to Rome had gotten sick.
Speaker 2: And nearly died, and they were afraid their friend had died.
Speaker 1: And the Bible says in the message, he wants to
Speaker 1: get back and reassure you that he's fine. This is
Speaker 1: a key to happiness. The more considerate you learn to
Speaker 1: be of other people's needs, other people's doubts, their fears,
Speaker 1: the more considerate you learn to be as a husband,
Speaker 1: as a wife, the happier your marriage is gonna be.
Speaker 1: If you are inconsiderate, you're gonna have an unhappy marriage. Now,
Speaker 1: 1 Corinthians 1.10 says this. You must, this is not
Speaker 1: an option, you must get along with each other You
Speaker 1: must learn to be considerate.
Speaker 2: Circle the word learn.
Speaker 1: You must learn to be considerate of one another, cultivating
Speaker 1: a life in common. I think every marriage ought to
Speaker 1: learn that. learn that verse. We all ought to memorize
Speaker 1: that one. You must learn to be considerate, because you
Speaker 1: are by nature not naturally considerate.
Speaker 2: And you have to cultivate, circle that word, cultivate a.
Speaker 1: Life in common. He's saying it takes work. You know
Speaker 1: I grow a garden of vegetables every year, and it
Speaker 1: takes cultivation. They don't just grow on their own. I
Speaker 1: have to go out and prepare the soil, break up
Speaker 1: the dirt clods, I have to add in the nutrients,
Speaker 1: I have to water, I have to weed, feed, I cultivate.
Speaker 1: And he's saying it takes work to cultivate a life
Speaker 1: in common. You know what the problem with most marriages today?
Speaker 1: They've stopped working. They've stopped working on the marriage so
Speaker 1: the marriage stops working. When you don't work on the marriage,
Speaker 1: then the marriage doesn't work.
Speaker 2: That's obvious.
Speaker 1: And a lot of people would rather give up on
Speaker 1: a marriage than work on a marriage. He says you
Speaker 1: gotta cultivate a common life together. And what is it?
Speaker 1: He says it's through consideration. We have to be thoughtful
Speaker 1: of the effect of our words and the effect of
Speaker 1: our actions. That does not come natural to me. Maybe
Speaker 1: it comes natural to you. It doesn't come natural to me.
Speaker 1: I don't naturally think about how my words are gonna
Speaker 1: affect you or how my actions are gonna affect you.
Speaker 1: Paul is an example, 1 Corinthians 10, 33. He says,
Speaker 1: I don't just do what I like. I don't just
Speaker 1: do what I like or what's best for me, but
Speaker 1: I do what's best for everyone so that they may
Speaker 1: be saved. Paul says, I put the conversion of others
Speaker 1: before my comfort. I put the conversion, their conversion before
Speaker 1: my comfort. Now there's a fourth quality. If I wanna
Speaker 1: be happy, I've gotta learn these things. I've gotta learn
Speaker 1: how to shift the focus away from me to others.
Speaker 1: I've gotta learn to become the person, a person that
Speaker 1: people trust by doing what I say I do, keeping
Speaker 1: my promises. Then I gotta learn how to work well
Speaker 1: with others, learning to cooperate, learning to be considerate at work,
Speaker 1: at home, in the neighborhood, whatever. And that'll increase my happiness.
Speaker 1: There's one other one, and this is a really big one.
Speaker 1: If I genuinely want to be happy in life, the
Speaker 1: fourth choice you need to make to be happy in
Speaker 1: life is to live for something worth dying for. Until
Speaker 1: you have that, you will not have ultimate happiness in
Speaker 1: your life. I must learn to live for something worth
Speaker 1: dying for. Most people are giving first class allegiance to
Speaker 1: second class causes and those causes are betraying them. I
Speaker 1: talked to one time to a guy, he said, I
Speaker 1: climbed the ladder of success when I got to the top,
Speaker 1: I found it was leaning against the wrong wall. And
Speaker 1: a lot of times we give big time commitment to
Speaker 1: small time causes that aren't gonna last. The question you
Speaker 1: need to ask yourself, that you're given all your time,
Speaker 1: all your energy, all.
Speaker 2: Your thoughts, whatever you think about.
Speaker 1: Most, and you're giving all your time and energy and
Speaker 1: money to these things, ask, how much is this gonna
Speaker 1: matter five years from today? How much is it gonna
Speaker 1: matter 10 years? How much is it gonna matter in 1,000 years?
Speaker 1: The best use of your life is to invest it
Speaker 1: in that which outlasts it. You need to live for
Speaker 1: something worth dying for, and you are not ready to
Speaker 1: live You're not ready to live, to really live, until
Speaker 1: you know what's worth dying for. If you've never figured
Speaker 1: that out, you're coasting. You're not really living, you're existing.
Speaker 1: You're not ready to live till you know what's worth
Speaker 1: dying for. Now Paul ends with these words about Epaphroditus.
Speaker 1: Verse 27 and verse 30. He says, indeed, talking about Epaphroditus,
Speaker 1: he was very ill and he almost died. He risked
Speaker 1: his life that's live for something worth dying for, risked
Speaker 1: his life for the work of Christ, and he was
Speaker 1: at the point of death while trying to do for
Speaker 1: me the things you, you my friends back in Philippi,
Speaker 1: couldn't do because you were far away. Now let me
Speaker 1: give you the background again on this. Paul is in
Speaker 1: prison in Rome. The Philippian church is in Greece. It's
Speaker 1: 800 miles away, okay? The Philippian church decides to send
Speaker 1: a care package to Paul in prison. There are no planes,
Speaker 1: there are no trains, there are no automobiles, and it's
Speaker 1: 800 miles. And there's only one way you can get
Speaker 1: to Rome, walk. It's gonna be an 800 mile walk
Speaker 1: to deliver this offering that the Philippians have decided to take. Paphroditus,
Speaker 1: a member of that church, raises his head, I'll do it.
Speaker 1: I'll do it. I'll walk 800 miles through thick and thin,
Speaker 1: through robbers, thieves, battling armies.
Speaker 2: And all kinds of things like that.
Speaker 1: I'll walk 800 miles just to take a gift from
Speaker 1: our church to a guy who's in prison 800 miles away.
Speaker 1: It says he risked his life. The Greek there literally
Speaker 1: says he hazarded his life. It's a gambling term. Epaphroditus
Speaker 1: is God's godly gambler. He gambled his life for Jesus Christ. Now,
Speaker 1: on this 800-mile walk to take this offering to Rome,
Speaker 1: it doesn't tell us what he got or what kind
Speaker 1: of disease or what happened, but he got so sick,
Speaker 1: he nearly died.
Speaker 2: And that's what everybody was worried about. He nearly died.
Speaker 1: But in spite of persistent pain, he completes his mission
Speaker 1: and he finishes what he starts. Now let me ask
Speaker 1: you two very personal questions for you this year, 2,000
Speaker 1: years later. Here are my two questions for you. What
Speaker 1: commitment have you started that you haven't yet finished? What
Speaker 1: if Epaphroditus in the middle got sick and just said,
Speaker 1: I give up, I'm going back to Philippi?
Speaker 2: He wouldn't have completed his mission.
Speaker 1: What commitment have you made that you need to keep?
Speaker 1: Maybe it's a commitment that to your spouse, a commitment
Speaker 1: you made to your husband, a commitment you made to
Speaker 1: your wife that I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna work
Speaker 1: on this, but you haven't. Maybe a commitment you made
Speaker 1: to one of your children or to a friend. Maybe it's,
Speaker 1: I don't know, a commitment you made to God What
Speaker 1: have you started that you need to complete? What have
Speaker 1: you begun? You made a commitment to God and you
Speaker 1: need to keep that commitment. You need to finish it.
Speaker 1: You need to be consistent and you need to be reliable.
Speaker 1: Let me ask you a second question. Is your commitment
Speaker 1: to Christ deep enough to cause you to risk your life?
Speaker 1: This is why these people Timothy and Epaphroditus is so rare.
Speaker 1: There aren't many people like this. I mean, if your church,
Speaker 1: if Saddleback Church asked you to walk 800 miles to
Speaker 1: deliver a gift, would you do it? Would you do it?
Speaker 1: There aren't many people like this guy. Sure, I'll do it.
Speaker 1: I'll go walk 800 miles to take a gift to
Speaker 1: a guy in need. Would you do that?
Speaker 2: Would you do that?
Speaker 1: There aren't many people like this, it's rare. That's why
Speaker 1: the Bible says, honor them. He says, you're to honor, Timothy,
Speaker 1: you're to honor men like this. See, most people say, well,
Speaker 1: I'll live for Christ as long as it's convenient. But
Speaker 1: right now, there's a good game on, excuse me. Most
Speaker 1: people will be happy to live for Christ as long
Speaker 1: as it's convenient and it's comfortable. Are you willing to
Speaker 1: live for Christ at work when it's inconvenient and it's uncomfortable? Well, no,
Speaker 1: then you're not much of a Christian. This is why
Speaker 1: God says honor people like this. God says honor those
Speaker 1: who take risks sharing the gospel. God is not finished
Speaker 1: testing your faith.
Speaker 2: So get ready.
Speaker 1: You think God's gonna let you just coast the rest
Speaker 1: of your life, really? You think God's gonna say, oh,
Speaker 1: all of the big risks in your life are behind
Speaker 1: you now.
Speaker 2: Are you kidding me?
Speaker 1: As long as you're alive, God's gonna keep testing you
Speaker 1: with risky decisions for his sake to test your faith.
Speaker 1: God is gonna call you to be a part in
Speaker 1: some way to play some role of what he wants
Speaker 1: to do through this church. I'm absolutely certain of it
Speaker 1: or he wouldn't have called you here. And all I'm
Speaker 1: asking you to do is to pray this week. Say, God,
Speaker 1: the most dangerous prayer in the world.
Speaker 2: Remember, it's two words. Use me. I dare you to
Speaker 2: pray the most dangerous prayer in the world.
Speaker 1: Use me. I'm afraid to pray that prayer. Pray it.
Speaker 1: Use me because it is the secret of happiness. You
Speaker 1: don't know really how to live until you know what's
Speaker 1: worth dying for.
Speaker 2: I want you to write this down. The last thing
Speaker 2: you write down.
Speaker 1: Happiness comes from putting service before security. Happiness comes from
Speaker 1: putting service before security. God blesses those who serve him
Speaker 1: even when it's inconvenient and uncomfortable. Happiness comes from putting
Speaker 1: service before security. Not doing the safe thing, but doing
Speaker 1: the thing that stretches your faith. And if you say, God,
Speaker 1: use me, he'll figure out what that is for you,
Speaker 1: and he'll let you know. And we'll end with Jesus'
Speaker 1: secret of happiness, which sums up what we've looked at
Speaker 1: this weekend. Mark 8, 35, Jesus said this. Only those
Speaker 1: who give away their lives for my sake and for
Speaker 1: the sake of the good news will ever know what
Speaker 1: it means to really live. Only those who give away
Speaker 1: their lives live for something worth dying for. For my
Speaker 1: sake and for the sake of the good news will
Speaker 1: ever know what it means to really live. You're just
Speaker 1: existing until you have a purpose greater than yourself to
Speaker 1: get out of bed for in the morning.
Speaker 2: Now let me summarize.
Speaker 1: The happiest people on earth are caring, consistent, cooperative, considerate,
Speaker 1: and courageous.
Speaker 2: That's what we just looked at. They're caring.
Speaker 1: They get the focus off themselves. They're consistent. They learn
Speaker 1: to be trustworthy. They're cooperative and considerate. They know how
Speaker 1: to work with other people on a team. And they're courageous.
Speaker 1: They're willing to take risks in faith. Let's bow our heads.
Speaker 1: If you wanna be happy, I invite you to pray
Speaker 1: this prayer with me. Dear God, I wanna be like
Speaker 1: these guys. I want to learn to be happy. I
Speaker 1: realize that happiness isn't a matter of luck, it's a
Speaker 1: matter of learning. That I can choose to be happy.
Speaker 1: I can make decisions to be happy. I can develop
Speaker 1: character that will make me happy. So help me to
Speaker 1: get the focus off myself, Lord. I'm really sick and
Speaker 1: tired of looking at me. Help me to become somebody
Speaker 1: that people can trust. Reliable, dependable, trustworthy. Help me to
Speaker 1: do what I say I do. Help me to keep
Speaker 1: my promises. And Lord, I need to learn how to
Speaker 1: get along better with others. I need to learn how
Speaker 1: to cooperate and I need to learn how to be considerate.
Speaker 1: I need to learn how to be a team member.
Speaker 1: how to work with people who are different from me.
Speaker 1: I wanna be like Paul who said, I don't just
Speaker 1: do what's best for me, what's best for everybody.
Speaker 2: If you're married, say, Lord, help me.
Speaker 1: To cultivate a life in common with my spouse. Say, Lord,
Speaker 1: help me to learn to be considerate of my spouse
Speaker 1: and my kids. And Lord, help me to live for
Speaker 1: something worth dying for. I'm going to pray the most
Speaker 1: dangerous prayer right now, Lord. Use me. I don't know
Speaker 1: what that means, but I'm open. And I trust that
Speaker 1: you'll show me what you want to do in my
Speaker 1: life that will stretch my faith. Use me the way
Speaker 1: you plan. Not the way somebody else planned, but your plan.
Speaker 1: If you've never invited Jesus Christ in your life, say,
Speaker 1: Jesus Christ, come into my life and save me. Forgive
Speaker 1: my sins. Change me. Make me the person you want
Speaker 1: me to be. Father, I thank you for these who've
Speaker 1: prayed this prayer today. We know that holiness leads to happiness.
Speaker 1: That happiness actually comes from holiness. And as we become
Speaker 1: more like you, we become more happy. I pray a
Speaker 1: blessing on every person here that whatever you've called us
Speaker 1: to do, we will do. Whatever commitments we've made, we
Speaker 1: will keep. And I pray this blessing in the name
Speaker 1: of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.