1
00:00:00,240 --> 00:00:05,719
Speaker 1: A Christmas crime. Missus Tigilbert was a stately looking girl

2
00:00:05,879 --> 00:00:08,599
in a soft white gown with a scarf of the

3
00:00:08,679 --> 00:00:13,160
same material tied lightly about her shoulders. There was a

4
00:00:13,240 --> 00:00:17,039
sort of Marie an Dooinette's suggestion in her aspect, and also,

5
00:00:17,239 --> 00:00:20,440
as it were, the shadow of a brooding sorrow hanging

6
00:00:20,480 --> 00:00:24,480
over her. She was from somewhere or other. We haven't

7
00:00:24,519 --> 00:00:27,480
always time in this busy world of ours to find

8
00:00:27,559 --> 00:00:31,440
out where everybody is from. There was a general impression

9
00:00:31,519 --> 00:00:34,560
that she had lately come back from abroad. She was

10
00:00:34,679 --> 00:00:37,960
visiting in town. She was a friend of our hostess,

11
00:00:38,119 --> 00:00:42,799
Missus grumbold Or had been particularly recommended to her, and

12
00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:46,799
that lively young matron had invited her for this dinner.

13
00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:51,840
People came rather late, and Missus Grumbled, busy with about

14
00:00:51,880 --> 00:00:55,320
a hundred things at once, as was her usual custom,

15
00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:58,359
was not able to tell much about this guest in

16
00:00:58,399 --> 00:01:03,960
advance either. Mister Grasseletree, who took mister Gilbert in, was

17
00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:08,280
particularly impressed by her. Indeed, he induced the hostess to

18
00:01:08,439 --> 00:01:11,680
change the arrangement already made and give her to him.

19
00:01:12,359 --> 00:01:16,400
Towards him, on the contrary, she showed as much asperity

20
00:01:16,480 --> 00:01:20,480
as politeness permitted. If he drew from her an occasional, rare,

21
00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:23,719
pale smile, it was only by the exertion of his

22
00:01:23,879 --> 00:01:29,879
utmost powers of entertainment. Who was mister Grasseletree, Oh, Grosseletree

23
00:01:30,040 --> 00:01:32,840
was a kind of law unto himself. He was one

24
00:01:32,879 --> 00:01:35,799
of those persons such as we meet with in our

25
00:01:35,879 --> 00:01:40,200
journeys about the club and of town. In short, Grosseletree

26
00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:44,959
was Grasseletree. It was Christmas Eve. After dinner, A couple

27
00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:49,439
of standard young bunjo players of North America gave some selections.

28
00:01:50,239 --> 00:01:54,200
Miss Amy Goboy of the Amateur Comedy Company recited a

29
00:01:54,239 --> 00:01:57,359
sweet thing or two, and then we settled down upon

30
00:01:57,359 --> 00:02:00,799
the floor to tell ghost stories. We spread out a

31
00:02:00,799 --> 00:02:04,239
lot of cushions comfortably all around, and in the midst

32
00:02:04,879 --> 00:02:08,879
sat a large teen pan containing a plate in which

33
00:02:08,919 --> 00:02:13,319
burned a mixture of salt and alcohol. This cast a pale,

34
00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:16,919
flickering light over all the faces and gave the proper

35
00:02:16,960 --> 00:02:20,919
weird and ghastly effect. In spite of this, however, the

36
00:02:20,919 --> 00:02:26,319
ghost stories rather languished. Mister Grausseltrey now all at once

37
00:02:26,800 --> 00:02:30,800
drew a heavy sigh, keeping Miss Ernest and de Gilbert

38
00:02:31,319 --> 00:02:36,840
it might be noted well under observation, speaking of Christmas presents,

39
00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:39,520
said he, when nobody at all had been speaking of

40
00:02:39,599 --> 00:02:44,360
Christmas presents. Speaking of Christmas presents, fellow sufferers, I'd like

41
00:02:44,439 --> 00:02:47,560
to submit a case to you, anything up to a

42
00:02:47,599 --> 00:02:51,080
packing case. Now is your time. There are stockings here

43
00:02:51,120 --> 00:02:55,240
that will hold it. Speak for yourself, mister Chinkerton, said

44
00:02:55,280 --> 00:02:58,759
Missus grumbled. I thought it more magnanimous to speak for

45
00:02:58,800 --> 00:03:02,759
miss Gubboy or Missus ten Stroke. Both those young ladies

46
00:03:02,919 --> 00:03:07,240
uttered shrill exclamations of protest and resentment at this audacity.

47
00:03:07,759 --> 00:03:10,599
Now suppose a man had bought a present for another

48
00:03:10,759 --> 00:03:14,439
man and then yielded to the temptation of keeping it himself,

49
00:03:14,840 --> 00:03:19,120
went on Grasseltree. Mister Grasseletree has yielded to a temptation.

50
00:03:19,759 --> 00:03:22,439
I'm not surprised at it at all. I think him

51
00:03:22,520 --> 00:03:26,800
quite capable of it, said Elsie Tenstroke. Tell us all

52
00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:31,639
about it, clamored the company. Well, it's like this. You

53
00:03:31,759 --> 00:03:36,520
see before you one who whom which? But let it pass.

54
00:03:37,039 --> 00:03:40,120
Despise me if you will, but hear me. I know

55
00:03:40,439 --> 00:03:43,159
not why I speak to you of this now, but

56
00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:47,560
probably because there comes to every conscious burdened criminal, a

57
00:03:47,639 --> 00:03:51,879
moment when all considerations of prudence must be laid aside.

58
00:03:52,400 --> 00:03:56,719
Oh indeed, said Missus grumbled, and she vivaciously threw with

59
00:03:56,879 --> 00:03:59,960
him a small sopho pillow that made a convenient Missus.

60
00:04:00,840 --> 00:04:03,560
I bought the nicest thing I could think of as

61
00:04:03,560 --> 00:04:06,759
a Christmas present for a friend, and then couldn't bear

62
00:04:06,840 --> 00:04:09,360
to give it to him. I robbed him, as it were.

63
00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:13,479
He bowed his head as in gloomy remorse upon his hand,

64
00:04:14,080 --> 00:04:16,560
and I could never look him in the face again.

65
00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:20,759
It was only between you and yourself, wasn't it, asked

66
00:04:20,759 --> 00:04:24,879
Amy Goboy. He never knew it, And besides, a person

67
00:04:24,879 --> 00:04:28,040
has a right to change his mind. No, that was

68
00:04:28,079 --> 00:04:31,920
the worst of it. There was glaring testimony and proof

69
00:04:32,279 --> 00:04:35,319
witnesses could be produced to show that I had actually

70
00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:38,920
bought it for him. Well, it could be easily explained.

71
00:04:39,079 --> 00:04:42,519
And I suppose nothing came of it. My dear friend

72
00:04:42,639 --> 00:04:46,000
was ruined, and the article I had proposed to give

73
00:04:46,079 --> 00:04:49,720
him would have saved him. That's all I am, the

74
00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:54,199
cause of all his calamities. Will you stop your circumlocutions

75
00:04:54,199 --> 00:04:58,600
and go on, demanded Missus grumbled, peremptorily, I used to

76
00:04:58,639 --> 00:05:01,759
see the article in the show window day after day

77
00:05:01,759 --> 00:05:04,439
as I passed by. I thought I could get it

78
00:05:04,519 --> 00:05:08,680
at any time, and so was in no hurry. It's

79
00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:11,160
the very thing for old Fred, I used to say

80
00:05:11,199 --> 00:05:14,079
to myself and the others. It will suit him to

81
00:05:14,199 --> 00:05:17,839
a tea. Old Fred shall have it, as sure as

82
00:05:17,879 --> 00:05:21,519
my name is some grassel tree. One day it was missing,

83
00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:24,639
and I had a regular panic. But I found it

84
00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:26,839
had only been taken out of the window to be

85
00:05:26,879 --> 00:05:31,079
shined up a bit. That decided me. I bought it

86
00:05:31,120 --> 00:05:34,439
at once. Some poor devil of a mechanic had got

87
00:05:34,439 --> 00:05:37,160
it up for himself originally, and it was the only

88
00:05:37,199 --> 00:05:40,319
one of the kind. There never was a thing more

89
00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:44,680
exactly adapted to Fred's case. At the name of Fred,

90
00:05:45,079 --> 00:05:49,319
Miss di Gilbert, who had sat hitherto in dignified silence,

91
00:05:49,759 --> 00:05:53,360
had visibly started and she began to pay close attention.

92
00:05:54,439 --> 00:05:58,360
What was it? Demanded a chorus of voices. It was

93
00:05:58,399 --> 00:06:02,079
a most ingenious invention. I returned to America with it

94
00:06:02,160 --> 00:06:07,360
about three weeks afterwards. Do you want to drive us mad? Article?

95
00:06:07,639 --> 00:06:12,319
Think invention? What was it? What was it? It was

96
00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:15,920
an antoll a phobo tych is tougher on. That's what

97
00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:19,839
it was, is that all of it? Do you get

98
00:06:19,879 --> 00:06:23,600
a commission? Shall we leave orders for it at the grosses,

99
00:06:23,959 --> 00:06:28,279
the stationer's or the blacksmiths. Tell us instantly what you

100
00:06:28,439 --> 00:06:33,199
mean and seize this aggravating conduct. That's a part of it.

101
00:06:33,199 --> 00:06:38,519
It was a musical early rising without alarm clock, oh, indeed,

102
00:06:38,879 --> 00:06:44,399
only an alarm clock. No, without alarm clock. Instead of

103
00:06:44,439 --> 00:06:47,800
springing at you in a ferocious way, as those clocks

104
00:06:47,920 --> 00:06:54,160
usually do, like a kind of moral rattlesnake, it began gently, soothingly,

105
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:59,800
with soft, mellifluous notes, and gradually increased the pressure till

106
00:06:59,839 --> 00:07:02,639
you were thrilled all over with an idea of the

107
00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:05,839
grandeur and glory of getting up to breakfast and going

108
00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:09,160
about your day's work. I tell you what, when you

109
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:12,920
had once known the antol aphabot tachis staffer on, it

110
00:07:13,079 --> 00:07:17,560
was inviolable. But at first I had hesitated between that

111
00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:21,839
and a thlough pill acousticon. Is that all of it?

112
00:07:22,160 --> 00:07:25,120
And would your friend have liked that too? He was

113
00:07:25,160 --> 00:07:28,680
an amateur of all curious contrivances, and I am sure

114
00:07:28,720 --> 00:07:33,560
you would What was that curious contrivance? Oh? That was

115
00:07:33,600 --> 00:07:37,519
a combined crush hat and acoustic fan. You could use

116
00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:40,000
it at the opera, you know, or a concert for

117
00:07:40,079 --> 00:07:43,240
bringing the sounds nearer, And it might serve to fill

118
00:07:43,319 --> 00:07:46,439
up a gap in the conversation now and then, or

119
00:07:46,480 --> 00:07:50,000
a gap in one's information. Even this would have saved

120
00:07:50,079 --> 00:07:52,399
him from much of the misery into which he fell.

121
00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:57,000
I was Fred Bradstock's worst enemy. Imagine the feelings with

122
00:07:57,079 --> 00:08:00,759
which I first met him, after thus purloining his property.

123
00:08:01,959 --> 00:08:07,240
Miss Ernndstinder Gilbert started now, indeed, one would say she

124
00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:12,240
had some peculiar interest in this name. Missus grumbled, endeavored

125
00:08:12,279 --> 00:08:15,199
in the dark to kick the narrator warningly with her

126
00:08:15,240 --> 00:08:19,079
small foot, but did not succeed in reaching him. If

127
00:08:19,079 --> 00:08:22,639
it's Red Bradstock you mean here put in her husband,

128
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:26,040
you are not troubled with confronting him. Very much. Of late,

129
00:08:26,839 --> 00:08:30,560
he's been at the Antipodes or somewhere near it, for

130
00:08:30,639 --> 00:08:33,639
I don't know how long he's in the bermudas now,

131
00:08:33,759 --> 00:08:37,919
I believe with a yachting party. Happily for me, yes

132
00:08:38,399 --> 00:08:42,679
assented the narrator with a new access of mournfulness. What

133
00:08:42,799 --> 00:08:46,320
I tell you of happened a good while ago. We

134
00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:49,720
are judged by our intentions, and I felt guilty before

135
00:08:49,799 --> 00:08:53,879
him even from the first, though I little suspected then

136
00:08:54,039 --> 00:08:56,639
what genuine cause I was going to have for it

137
00:08:57,440 --> 00:09:01,240
a gasp merging into a disdainful sniff, or a disdainful

138
00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:04,799
sniff merging into a gasp came from the direction of Missigelbert.

139
00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:08,720
The worst burden on me was the witnesses who had

140
00:09:08,799 --> 00:09:12,200
known of my intentions. They all returned to this country

141
00:09:12,279 --> 00:09:14,879
at once. I had to be a whole corps of

142
00:09:14,919 --> 00:09:18,360
detectives in myself to keep them and fred apart. I

143
00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:21,240
paid the fare of one of them to Florida, got

144
00:09:21,279 --> 00:09:25,519
another away on some plausible pretexts to Montreal, and led

145
00:09:25,519 --> 00:09:28,159
the third into such a good thing in an interest

146
00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:31,399
of mine in a Montana stock ranch, that he couldn't

147
00:09:31,440 --> 00:09:34,960
possibly refuse to go there. Why not confess if you

148
00:09:35,039 --> 00:09:38,279
felt so badly about it, as you say, you do

149
00:09:38,440 --> 00:09:42,879
not know the untole Aphobo the persuader. When you talk

150
00:09:43,039 --> 00:09:46,679
like that, will you believe that I, inheriting a nervous

151
00:09:46,679 --> 00:09:51,080
temperament and almost constitutionally incapable of sleeping after seven in

152
00:09:51,120 --> 00:09:55,200
the morning, actually cultivated the habit of taking opiates to

153
00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:58,559
enjoy as much as possible, the delightful sensation of being

154
00:09:58,600 --> 00:10:01,879
waked up by the aunt all a Faubow Tackey's staffer,

155
00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:06,559
on are all your long names strictly necessary? Demanded Miss

156
00:10:06,639 --> 00:10:10,600
Amy Gobboy suspiciously. Are they really the names of the things?

157
00:10:11,320 --> 00:10:13,879
They strike me as very good names for the things,

158
00:10:14,159 --> 00:10:17,399
and I give them for what they are worth. You see,

159
00:10:17,440 --> 00:10:20,639
the case of Red was peculiar. On the one hand,

160
00:10:21,039 --> 00:10:24,039
he had some heart trouble and couldn't be called by

161
00:10:24,159 --> 00:10:28,360
any of the existing alarm clocks because their wattling metallic

162
00:10:28,440 --> 00:10:32,440
things might have scared him into an untimely grave. On

163
00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:36,240
the other hand, he needed some assistance, for he could

164
00:10:36,240 --> 00:10:39,039
not be depended upon to wake up on his own account.

165
00:10:39,679 --> 00:10:43,559
Out of these conditions developed to the possibility for evil

166
00:10:43,600 --> 00:10:48,679
in My Duplicity, in all its glaring horror. Charlie Chinkerton,

167
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:52,559
a versatile genius, had placed himself at the piano and

168
00:10:52,759 --> 00:10:56,559
was playing a slow accompaniment to the narrative. But the

169
00:10:56,639 --> 00:10:59,840
last words he struck two or three chords of heavily

170
00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:04,639
ominous import I began to trace constantly in Fred's record

171
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:08,519
the baneful influence of my theft. There was the case

172
00:11:08,519 --> 00:11:13,000
for instance where he lost the grizzly in California. His

173
00:11:13,159 --> 00:11:16,519
guide inadvertently failed to call him, and the hand was

174
00:11:16,639 --> 00:11:19,799
up and away three hours before he put in an appearance.

175
00:11:20,360 --> 00:11:23,519
It was a stuffed greasily, it is true, but if

176
00:11:23,559 --> 00:11:25,679
he had been there, he would have known it and

177
00:11:25,720 --> 00:11:28,600
saved the reputation of the party, for he had been

178
00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:32,200
taken in once with a stuffed deer in the Adirondacks

179
00:11:32,799 --> 00:11:35,159
grosseel Tree. You are up to something in all this,

180
00:11:35,559 --> 00:11:38,399
said our hostess. I don't know what it is, but

181
00:11:38,480 --> 00:11:40,879
I think I ought to throw another sofa cushion at you,

182
00:11:41,519 --> 00:11:44,519
and she proceeded to do so. You are too good,

183
00:11:44,879 --> 00:11:49,440
said the story teller, easily catching this ineffective missile. Then

184
00:11:49,559 --> 00:11:53,879
he continued the aunt. All the musical early Rising without

185
00:11:53,919 --> 00:11:58,120
alarm Persuader would have saved him from being left by

186
00:11:58,159 --> 00:12:01,720
the steam launch at the Ocean Yacht. It would have

187
00:12:01,799 --> 00:12:05,720
saved him from being left the great rockaway Stipplechases, and

188
00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:08,720
again it would have saved him from being late at

189
00:12:08,720 --> 00:12:11,799
his broker's office the day that Cage and qu stock

190
00:12:11,919 --> 00:12:15,200
jumped up twenty points in an hour. I need not

191
00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:18,200
go over the list of all the other appointments, whether

192
00:12:18,279 --> 00:12:22,960
of business or pleasure, he disastrously missed through the same cause.

193
00:12:23,720 --> 00:12:27,159
But the really tragic episode was the breaking off of

194
00:12:27,279 --> 00:12:31,919
his engagement. Chinkerton here struck a most discordant crush upon

195
00:12:31,960 --> 00:12:35,720
the keys. This is really too much, exclaimed the hostess,

196
00:12:35,879 --> 00:12:39,120
whether she meant Chickerton at the piano or some other circumstance.

197
00:12:39,759 --> 00:12:43,559
Miss Gilbert, who had shown signs of extreme restlessness for

198
00:12:43,679 --> 00:12:47,360
some time past, attempted to rise from the improvised divan.

199
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:50,879
It was not so easy a matter, however, in the

200
00:12:50,919 --> 00:12:55,440
toilet of the day and before she had progressed far Grasseltreeck,

201
00:12:55,600 --> 00:13:00,399
continuing imperturbably but more rapidly, had said, they say the

202
00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:04,000
girl he was engaged to was a perfect fascinator, just

203
00:13:04,120 --> 00:13:07,240
too pretty for anything. She was from somewhere out of

204
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:12,200
town Sprutin, Juville, Yonkers, Baltimore or something that way. She

205
00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:16,720
was rich, a scuff of indignation from Miss Gilbert, engaged

206
00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:21,919
in her efforts to get up, beautiful, refined, accomplished, most

207
00:13:22,120 --> 00:13:25,120
charming in every way. She was, as I have been

208
00:13:25,159 --> 00:13:28,679
told all that the most ardent fancy could paint, and

209
00:13:28,720 --> 00:13:33,399
I I you conceive the bitterness of this avowal was

210
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:37,399
the sole cause of this breaking of that engagement. Missus

211
00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:42,000
Gilbert settled back with a sigh upon her cushions. Missus

212
00:13:42,000 --> 00:13:47,320
grumbled telegraphed her reassuringly with eyes and lips. He does

213
00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:53,320
not know. I have not told anybody. It was apparent

214
00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:57,200
that Graustletree could not be stopped. One thing was certain

215
00:13:57,360 --> 00:14:01,240
that he held the attention of the company, particularly that

216
00:14:01,360 --> 00:14:06,559
of its most perverse member, very fixedly. The union of

217
00:14:06,600 --> 00:14:11,200
those two admirable persons exactly suited to each other was

218
00:14:11,240 --> 00:14:17,879
prevented by the Antelafo the musical early rising producer. Once more,

219
00:14:18,279 --> 00:14:23,399
poor Fred was missing at the critical moment the wedding, no,

220
00:14:23,879 --> 00:14:28,120
but almost the next thing to it. His fiance's heart

221
00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:30,559
had been set on having him appear at a certain

222
00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:34,440
dinner to meet her relatives and so on. He did

223
00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:37,600
not appear, and she threw him over, and that was

224
00:14:37,679 --> 00:14:40,200
the end of it all. But it was only the

225
00:14:40,279 --> 00:14:43,559
fault of not having the missing machine, and not his

226
00:14:43,679 --> 00:14:47,200
own in the list. I'll tell you all about it.

227
00:14:48,200 --> 00:14:52,799
One of the peculiarities of miss Er of his soffianced

228
00:14:53,759 --> 00:14:57,440
a part of her charm, showing force and real character

229
00:14:58,279 --> 00:15:02,120
was that she was implacable unchanging as the laws of

230
00:15:02,159 --> 00:15:06,120
the Meads and Persians. It is a delicate matter to

231
00:15:06,200 --> 00:15:09,519
touch upon, and I don't pretend to fathom the subtle

232
00:15:09,600 --> 00:15:13,519
mysteries of the female heart. But I have somehow gathered

233
00:15:13,879 --> 00:15:17,320
that there was another girl at the dinner who fluttered herself.

234
00:15:17,399 --> 00:15:20,600
She might have been a successful rival for Fred's affections,

235
00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:24,120
and it was thought he did not want to see

236
00:15:24,159 --> 00:15:28,159
her so publicly. Of course, it is amply demonstrated that

237
00:15:28,240 --> 00:15:31,159
there was nothing in this, if only by the fact

238
00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:34,600
that Fred has never set eyes upon that one since.

239
00:15:35,480 --> 00:15:38,639
But will you tell us what a musical alarm clock

240
00:15:38,799 --> 00:15:41,480
can have had to do with his being late at dinner?

241
00:15:42,039 --> 00:15:44,320
He don't want us to believe he slept all day.

242
00:15:44,399 --> 00:15:47,879
I suppose it was in Philadelphia, And now I think

243
00:15:47,919 --> 00:15:51,360
of it, it was in Philadelphia. They dined there in

244
00:15:51,399 --> 00:15:53,639
the middle of the day. For all I know, it

245
00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:57,440
was twelve o'clock sharp. But even if it was, considering

246
00:15:57,480 --> 00:16:00,480
the occasion and that he was visiting there ex presley

247
00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:03,279
on her account, he might have managed to get up

248
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:06,399
by noon at list once in his life. Oh he

249
00:16:06,519 --> 00:16:09,399
did in did I happened to know that he did

250
00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:12,480
a lot of things that day. Bright and early, he

251
00:16:12,559 --> 00:16:16,600
went out to bring more and attended the city troop races.

252
00:16:16,879 --> 00:16:20,039
He was on the jump from morning till night. But

253
00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:25,080
then self contradictory person cried, missus grumbled, what are you

254
00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:28,200
telling us? Why could he not have gone to the

255
00:16:28,279 --> 00:16:32,759
dinner as well as elsewhere? He mistook the day? You know,

256
00:16:33,279 --> 00:16:36,960
that's the point. He thought it was another day. But

257
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:40,799
in the name of long suffering patience, what had your

258
00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:44,799
wretched alarm clock to do with his mistaking the day? Oh,

259
00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:49,000
don't speak of it in that way, he protested, tenderly. Well,

260
00:16:49,720 --> 00:16:55,080
your absurd alarm clock, then, pardon me, not an alarm clock.

261
00:16:55,639 --> 00:16:59,840
It was a without alarm clock. It was a musical earlyer.

262
00:17:00,759 --> 00:17:05,200
But what had that do with his mistaking the day? Oh? Yes,

263
00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:09,200
it had a calendar attachment. Didn't I tell you about that?

264
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:13,319
Or did I only mention itself? Lighting candle? If he

265
00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:16,160
had seen the calendar, you know, if he had seen

266
00:17:16,200 --> 00:17:21,039
that index hand come round slowly but inexorably, pointing out

267
00:17:21,079 --> 00:17:26,279
your Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Thursdays, No such dreadful error could

268
00:17:26,319 --> 00:17:29,880
have ever a reason. With this, the company began to

269
00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:33,720
break up While the preparations for departure were going on,

270
00:17:34,400 --> 00:17:39,400
mister Grasseltree and miss Ernest Sinde Gilbert gravitated together, casually,

271
00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:42,559
as it were, and drew a little apart. How did

272
00:17:42,599 --> 00:17:46,319
you know who I was? Asked the lady, with a languid,

273
00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:51,200
proud way of poising her head from the description Yours

274
00:17:51,319 --> 00:17:55,759
were the eyes, the hair, a certain stately carriage I

275
00:17:55,799 --> 00:17:58,960
had heard of from Fred too often to be forgotten.

276
00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:02,720
There was a particular charming dimple near the left corner

277
00:18:02,720 --> 00:18:05,759
of the mouth. That will do. On that score. When

278
00:18:05,799 --> 00:18:09,759
I discovered you here, I induced missus Grumbles by special

279
00:18:09,799 --> 00:18:13,599
request to let me take you in? Did you indeed?

280
00:18:14,079 --> 00:18:17,759
I half suspected it? Well, I knew you too. You

281
00:18:17,839 --> 00:18:22,680
were one of his dissolute companions. Ha ha, laughed her auditor,

282
00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:26,680
with only a rather hollow sort of mirth. However, tell me,

283
00:18:26,839 --> 00:18:30,079
she continued, Was there a single word of truth in

284
00:18:30,160 --> 00:18:33,640
all your ridiculous story? I really mean that there is

285
00:18:34,160 --> 00:18:37,480
that there was about such a clock, And I really

286
00:18:37,559 --> 00:18:40,119
mean that Fred adores the very ground you walk on.

287
00:18:40,720 --> 00:18:44,279
He is one of the most wretched men in two hemispheres.

288
00:18:44,319 --> 00:18:48,799
Without you there, that will do. Also were you serious

289
00:18:48,839 --> 00:18:51,240
when you said that his health was not good, that

290
00:18:51,359 --> 00:18:56,640
he was disposed to heart disease. Oh, reflected Grausseletree. So

291
00:18:56,799 --> 00:19:00,119
the wind lies in that quarter. She takes a little interest.

292
00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:03,799
After all, I honestly think his heart is in no danger,

293
00:19:04,119 --> 00:19:07,279
he said aloud, except in so far as it may

294
00:19:07,279 --> 00:19:10,720
be affected by his sufferings on your account. But you

295
00:19:10,839 --> 00:19:14,480
have given him such an absurd, stupid character. He is

296
00:19:14,519 --> 00:19:17,680
not the indolent person you represent him to be. He

297
00:19:17,759 --> 00:19:21,680
occupies himself in a great many useful ways, besides in

298
00:19:21,759 --> 00:19:24,920
his sports. Go back and say something that will set

299
00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:29,039
those people right about him. It would hardly be necessary.

300
00:19:29,599 --> 00:19:32,160
I fear those people are already in the habit of

301
00:19:32,200 --> 00:19:36,920
taking Samuel Grasseltree's utterances with some grains of salt. Then

302
00:19:37,039 --> 00:19:41,279
what does this all mean, she asked, infinitely puzzled that

303
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:45,079
I would give half I possess, as the novelists say,

304
00:19:45,680 --> 00:19:49,519
to bring you and my old young friend Frederick Bradstock

305
00:19:49,920 --> 00:19:53,200
together again. If in the meantime nothing has happened to

306
00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:56,119
prevent it, why can it not be done? May I

307
00:19:56,240 --> 00:20:00,000
venture to ask, with infinite respect whether anything has happened

308
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:06,039
on your side? No, she replied, diffidently nothing then, as

309
00:20:06,079 --> 00:20:10,039
between two sensible and well disposed human beings. Frankly, why

310
00:20:10,079 --> 00:20:13,640
can it not be done? No, no, it cannot be done.

311
00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:16,720
I will not hear of it on any account. The

312
00:20:16,799 --> 00:20:19,319
fact is he did not want to go to that

313
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:22,160
dinner from the first, and I had to try and

314
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:24,960
make him. I knew I must put my foot down

315
00:20:25,000 --> 00:20:28,039
in the beginning. Now tell me the real reason why

316
00:20:28,039 --> 00:20:31,119
he stayed away. I am sure you do not really

317
00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:34,359
think old Fred would get up false ones to account

318
00:20:34,359 --> 00:20:39,200
for it, expostulated his friend Grastletree. He has never given

319
00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:42,519
any except that he forgot the day. Why not accept

320
00:20:42,559 --> 00:20:46,680
that one? Then? By way of little variety, it's gospel truth.

321
00:20:46,799 --> 00:20:50,079
I assure you Fred was in a strange town. He

322
00:20:50,160 --> 00:20:52,680
had a lot of things to do, and he's always

323
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:55,720
something of a dreamer, you know, bless you, what's the

324
00:20:55,759 --> 00:20:59,240
harm in a little absent mindedness? The greatest men have

325
00:20:59,319 --> 00:21:02,440
been troubled by way. Look at me, I left my

326
00:21:02,519 --> 00:21:07,519
best umbrella in the omnibus this very morning, All Fred bradstignits.

327
00:21:07,640 --> 00:21:11,839
My dear missus Gigilbert is an accomplished wife with just

328
00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:14,680
the right kind of wife to infuse your own method

329
00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:18,960
and precision into shall we say, his madness. He'd be

330
00:21:19,000 --> 00:21:23,759
a model of models in every particular. I daresay, rejoined

331
00:21:23,759 --> 00:21:27,279
his hearer dryly. Let us hope he may get such

332
00:21:27,279 --> 00:21:30,200
a one. I have seen him knock his head against

333
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:33,200
the wall on account of his conduct a dozen times.

334
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:36,960
It was so uncomplimentary to her, he says. It can

335
00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:40,640
be explained. She treated me just as I deserved. She

336
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:45,440
couldn't have done otherwise. Of course I could not assented

337
00:21:45,559 --> 00:21:50,119
ernest in Gigilbert, But flashing very much and almost tearful,

338
00:21:50,359 --> 00:21:54,200
why didn't he do something further? He might have persisted,

339
00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:58,000
He might have kept on trying to explain, as I

340
00:21:58,079 --> 00:22:01,480
understand it, you would not see him. And poor Fred

341
00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:05,000
was never gliped with his pen, If I am right? Also,

342
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:08,440
you returned some of his letters unopened. Am I right?

343
00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:11,920
She lowered her head a trifle, as if in haughty

344
00:22:11,960 --> 00:22:15,960
admission that this was so. But somehow the shadow of

345
00:22:16,000 --> 00:22:19,039
a brooding sorrow did not seem to hang over mister

346
00:22:19,119 --> 00:22:22,759
Gilbert half as much now as formerly. Fred got it

347
00:22:22,799 --> 00:22:25,519
into his head at last that you were glad the

348
00:22:25,599 --> 00:22:28,359
match was off, and that you liked some one else

349
00:22:28,440 --> 00:22:31,759
better on this wrong tack as we now see it

350
00:22:32,000 --> 00:22:35,160
was he tried to brace up by devoting himself to

351
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:38,680
other women, but it was all no go. I happened

352
00:22:38,720 --> 00:22:41,319
to see it for myself, and I tell you there's

353
00:22:41,400 --> 00:22:45,160
not an unhappier man in Christendom to day than that

354
00:22:45,319 --> 00:22:49,079
same Fred Bradstock. You must go at once and say

355
00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:53,000
something before all those people to set him right, exclaimed

356
00:22:53,039 --> 00:22:59,279
his hearer a little irrelevantly, Ladies and gentlemen. Thereupon began gruttletree,

357
00:22:59,400 --> 00:23:03,400
advancing in a sort of professional way, Ladies and gentlemen

358
00:23:03,440 --> 00:23:07,200
of the company. I wish to say that, while driven

359
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:11,119
by a reckless despair, who is in overburdened conscience, I

360
00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:15,119
may at the same time have seemed to depreciate another person.

361
00:23:15,759 --> 00:23:18,960
Let me say that Fred Bradstock is no inmate of

362
00:23:19,000 --> 00:23:22,440
the Castle of Indolence, and that while all the claims

363
00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:28,319
of the untol aphobo Techistafferon remain as represented, anybody has

364
00:23:28,319 --> 00:23:31,160
got to get up very early in the morning, indeed,

365
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:34,599
to catch him napping. I seem to feel too a

366
00:23:34,680 --> 00:23:37,839
certain prophetic sense that the end of his troubles may

367
00:23:37,839 --> 00:23:41,920
be near. I would withdraw no essential statement, but I

368
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:45,720
suggest that all that part of the allegations relating to

369
00:23:45,759 --> 00:23:50,079
Frederick Bradstock be stricken out or construed only in that

370
00:23:50,240 --> 00:23:54,440
Bigwikian sense so proper to these genial East thirty fourth

371
00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:59,400
Street observance at this hospitable Christmas home, that is, this

372
00:23:59,559 --> 00:24:04,319
homeless like Christmas occasion, at this observant. In short, I

373
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:08,559
am thoroughly convinced that so far from needing adventitious aids,

374
00:24:09,039 --> 00:24:12,799
the more persons you sent to waken Frederic Bradstock, the

375
00:24:12,839 --> 00:24:16,400
sounder he would sleep, whereas the fewer and the less

376
00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:20,599
don't make it worse. Hastily whispered a voice at his sleeve,

377
00:24:21,200 --> 00:24:25,799
and the next moment she began hesitatingly. Of course, if

378
00:24:25,799 --> 00:24:29,759
you say, Fred's really sorry. In the very next mail

379
00:24:30,119 --> 00:24:33,200
there went to the Bermuda's, a letter in which Frederick

380
00:24:33,279 --> 00:24:36,640
Bradstock was assured that the chances of winning back his

381
00:24:36,720 --> 00:24:40,880
old sweetheart were now most promising. I told them all

382
00:24:40,960 --> 00:24:44,640
after dinner. The letter concluded, A wild tale of a

383
00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:47,720
without alarm clock I had meant to give you by

384
00:24:47,839 --> 00:24:50,480
hook and by crook. I fixed it all up with hair,

385
00:24:50,839 --> 00:24:53,599
and it's rather a handsome piece of work on my part.

386
00:24:54,279 --> 00:24:57,319
By the way, that clock isn't a bad one. I'll

387
00:24:57,359 --> 00:25:00,160
send you the maker's name. I dare say they are

388
00:25:00,200 --> 00:25:03,880
in the market by this time. Mister Gilbert's yours, my boy,

389
00:25:04,440 --> 00:25:08,119
come home and take her, and the blessing of Samuel Grasseltree.

390
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:12,319
At the very earliest moment, too, returned an answer from

391
00:25:12,319 --> 00:25:17,920
the bermudas I'm coming home, of course, his lucky young dog.

392
00:25:18,519 --> 00:25:23,920
Why shouldn't he? Of course he is interpolated Grasseltree complacently,

393
00:25:24,599 --> 00:25:30,400
I'm I'm bless me. What's this? What's this? I'm on

394
00:25:30,519 --> 00:25:34,200
my wedding trip, married to a lovely girl I met

395
00:25:34,200 --> 00:25:38,079
in the Islands. I've fair been on some time, but

396
00:25:38,240 --> 00:25:41,559
you've been so deuced off these last few years. No

397
00:25:41,759 --> 00:25:46,079
chance to tell you about it. Comparisons are odorous, but

398
00:25:46,279 --> 00:25:50,119
the de Gilbert, well, the fact is that the Gilbert

399
00:25:50,319 --> 00:25:54,400
was a little inclined to be domineering. Excuse a short letter.

400
00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:58,839
Tell you all about it when we meet. Samuel Grasseltree

401
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:02,240
was not an accomplished whistler, but on this occasion he

402
00:26:02,279 --> 00:26:06,200
whistled for an instant. He raised his hand against the

403
00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:09,519
without alarm clock, as if to do it violent injury.

404
00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:13,079
But instead of yielding to this impulse, he took it

405
00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:15,880
down from the modest place it had occupied in his

406
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:20,240
bedroom and placed it boldly on the most conspicuous wall

407
00:26:20,319 --> 00:26:25,079
of his apartment. After that, he sat down and reflected

408
00:26:25,160 --> 00:26:27,920
on the diverse characters of the persons who had heard

409
00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:32,680
history on Christmas Eve, and particularly on certain positive traits

410
00:26:32,759 --> 00:26:36,240
in mister Gilbert. He began to think he would take

411
00:26:36,279 --> 00:26:41,839
another European trip, and of a Christmas Crime by William Henry,

412
00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:42,319
Bishop