Speaker 1: Stuck at home.
Speaker 2: And alone. You'd think I could have some fun on.
Speaker 1: My own, but not all. I thought if with Cecily
Speaker 1: and Stephanie, what's up, everybody, welcome to boord af It's
Speaker 1: me Stephanie Wilder Taylor, and I'm here with the beautiful
Speaker 1: Cecily Nobler.
Speaker 2: I just agree with that, super beautiful. Thank y'all. What
Speaker 2: if I pretended that you didn't think you were and
Speaker 2: I was successfully, stop you are. You're pretty?
Speaker 3: Look at this old look in the mirror. Go to
Speaker 3: a mirror right now, And I'm like, no, I'm fine.
Speaker 3: I don't think I'm not.
Speaker 2: No, I'm you are not ugly. Stop stop thinking that.
Speaker 2: That's ridiculous. You're so pretty.
Speaker 3: I had a little argument with a friend somewhat recently
Speaker 3: who we've had. We've had this argument before, and I
Speaker 3: don't try, don't try to guess who it is, Like, okay,
Speaker 3: you know, but I don't want to. But we had
Speaker 3: this little thing where we took a picture and then
Speaker 3: I was like, let me let me filter it a
Speaker 3: little bit, like not a lot. I don't do the
Speaker 3: filtering where you take out all the wrinkles and stuff,
Speaker 3: but I like to lighten it. A little and take
Speaker 3: the dark short a little bit, like not where it
Speaker 3: doesn't look like me, but just a little bit better,
Speaker 3: slightly better.
Speaker 2: I don't change my body.
Speaker 3: I don't change a lot, but sometimes I just want
Speaker 3: the light to be a little brighter before it.
Speaker 2: And so I was like, does this look okay? And
Speaker 2: my friend was like, my god, like you look how
Speaker 2: you look? Like what are you gonna do? Oh?
Speaker 3: It was so and I we got into this and
Speaker 3: I'm feeling like, okay, I don't even want to say
Speaker 3: I'm feeling sensitive, Like I'm always sensitive. I've been sensitive
Speaker 3: since I was like two years old. I have a
Speaker 3: stage mother. I'm a woman, you know, an older woman
Speaker 3: who like who is beauty?
Speaker 2: Always?
Speaker 3: Not that I'm beautiful, but like that's what you led
Speaker 3: with with my mother and with Texas and you know
Speaker 3: what I mean. And it's just and so we had
Speaker 3: this little thing and I go, you know, it would
Speaker 3: not kill you to give a compliment to your friend,
Speaker 3: Like that's what friends are for. We like build each
Speaker 3: other up. And my friend was like, you know what,
Speaker 3: You're right, and I need to work on that. But
Speaker 3: now it's just gonna be like, oh my god, you
Speaker 3: are like a model.
Speaker 2: So I'm like, okay, well you don't, and then you're
Speaker 2: gonna say you don't have to do that, and then
Speaker 2: she's gonna go, oh my god, you can't be satisfied. Wow,
Speaker 2: I'm sorry. I thought you asked me to give you more.
Speaker 2: You're like, yeah, but I just didn't want it to
Speaker 2: feel I don't want to feel forced. Oh okay, you
Speaker 2: don't want it to feel forced. Sorry, Sorry, I didn't
Speaker 2: give you compliments, right, Cecily. I mean, it really is
Speaker 2: so crazy though, to be like, oh, let me, do
Speaker 2: you think this is a cute picture? And it's just like,
Speaker 2: I mean, what are you gonna do? You like how
Speaker 2: you look like?
Speaker 3: It was insane. It's very Estyan. It's like did you
Speaker 3: take the Landmark Forum class or something like? Look, I
Speaker 3: just tell it like it is right, and I like it.
Speaker 2: Get out my god. I was literally Okay, I would
Speaker 2: have even forgotten that this could be a topic, but
Speaker 2: I don't, and I have to I have to think
Speaker 2: of carefully, like how to even bring this up. But
Speaker 2: I was at a I was at a meeting, a
Speaker 2: meeting of the minds of people that don't want to drink. Okay,
Speaker 2: st An Stan scientology was not an AA meeting, Okay, like, oh,
Speaker 2: I get it, sorry, be real, let's just tell it
Speaker 2: like it is. Anyway, afterwards, with a group of people
Speaker 2: hanging out other people that don't drink, and there was
Speaker 2: a woman there who, uh was very she was she
Speaker 2: was a older woman, you know, older than me, and
Speaker 2: because I'm also an older woman, but she's older than me,
Speaker 2: and she was very proud of the fact that she's
Speaker 2: from New York and people in New York are very
Speaker 2: she's I was like, yeah, you know, new York vibes,
Speaker 2: I go, but she's lived in LA and she's lived
Speaker 2: in New York, so but she was really proud of
Speaker 2: the fact that she's like from New York and she's
Speaker 2: from Long Island, even though island she didn't talk like that,
Speaker 2: but she was from Long Island. But anyway, I was like, yeah,
Speaker 2: you know, I love like there's a vibe of people
Speaker 2: that are from either coast, you know. And she was like,
Speaker 2: I said, it's sort of like a you know. She goes, yeah,
Speaker 2: we tell it like it is, we're blunt, and I
Speaker 2: was like, I mean, that wasn't what I was going for.
Speaker 2: And then I realized that you know these people that
Speaker 2: are super proud of the fact that they just tell
Speaker 2: like it is. And then she proceeded to be like
Speaker 2: kind of insulting, sort of cold. Yeah, but like I
Speaker 2: she had the whole vibe of like, yeah, that's who
Speaker 2: I am.
Speaker 3: Take it or live it, you know, I don't say
Speaker 3: what I said like your mom, like your mom. After
Speaker 3: she got off the phone with like your aunt, yeah,
Speaker 3: from this is who I am.
Speaker 2: Y's who I am. Yes, And then she was trying
Speaker 2: she was being political, and at first it was kind
Speaker 2: of a political that I could get behind, and we
Speaker 2: were sort of talking about like you know, the Trump
Speaker 2: and how terrible it is. But then she started she
Speaker 2: was like yeah, she just started talking about like immigrants
Speaker 2: and how like she was kind of anti She's like, yeah,
Speaker 2: we just don't need to have open borders. And I
Speaker 2: was like, okay, like I thought we were like together
Speaker 2: on this, but now we're not. But now you're really
Speaker 2: leaning into like what I just tell it like it is,
Speaker 2: you know.
Speaker 3: But also like here's the thing that bugs me about
Speaker 3: stuff like that, No, you're not saying that there should
Speaker 3: be open borders and then people should just fly Like
Speaker 3: no one's saying that that's the thing that I hate
Speaker 3: that gets like a talking point that is so twisted
Speaker 3: and not true.
Speaker 2: It makes me crazy. It just makes me absolutely crazy.
Speaker 2: It's like they just yes, she did a like the
Speaker 2: Democrats like want open borders, and I said, you know,
Speaker 2: just FYI like not trying to like, you know, start
Speaker 2: a thing at a at a thing. We were just
Speaker 2: at lunch, and I was like, but you know, Obama
Speaker 2: like deported more way more people than tell me. And
Speaker 2: then and then like that was especially so and then
Speaker 2: she was like, well they should have been more, uh
Speaker 2: had more visuals. Like my god. I was like, okay, hey,
Speaker 2: I was like, oh my god, it's been so nice
Speaker 2: talking to you. I was like, but I'm just going
Speaker 2: to go because we were at a long table. There
Speaker 2: were like, you know, twenty five people, and I was like,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go. I haven't caught up with my other
Speaker 2: friend yet on the other side of the table. So
Speaker 2: I'm so nice talking to you. Good for you. I
Speaker 2: was like, I mean, not the time right for that.
Speaker 2: But it was that that thing of like super proud
Speaker 2: of like yeah, I'm just blunt okay, but that's not
Speaker 2: like not everybody likes that you're gonna find it.
Speaker 3: It's just a weird thing to say because I would
Speaker 3: never say this because I don't believe this, but I have.
Speaker 3: I actually, like, you know, I love the East Coast
Speaker 3: vib very much, like I totally feel like I belong there.
Speaker 3: And I said that many times through the years. Yes,
Speaker 3: and I do sort of don't. I don't want someone
Speaker 3: to be like, you look ugly. But my New York
Speaker 3: friends are Jersey friends. Like they don't say that because
Speaker 3: they're my friends. That's why I've chosen them, and we're
Speaker 3: all good like that. But sometimes when people say that
Speaker 3: stuff to me, like I'm in New Yorker, you don't
Speaker 3: fuck with this shit or whatever, I want to be like, well,
Speaker 3: I'm a Texan and so we're gonna like smile at you,
Speaker 3: but I do have a gun, Like I'm not gonna,
Speaker 3: I mean, if we're just gonna lean into whatever the
Speaker 3: thing is, I'm gonna be really nice to your face,
Speaker 3: but I am packing, so.
Speaker 2: So look out. Yeah, it's it's like I have a father.
Speaker 2: I have a little a complaint. Okay, So have you
Speaker 2: noticed how out of control Evite is these days? No,
Speaker 2: the problem with the Evite, the problem with the evite
Speaker 2: right now? Is that it's not You're not just inviting
Speaker 2: somebody to your event. Okay, Uh that's how it used
Speaker 2: to be. It was like, oh cool, it's like a
Speaker 2: paperless thing, like paper. You send them an evite and
Speaker 2: then they can say like yes or no, and you
Speaker 2: can go on there and you see your little who's going.
Speaker 2: But have you tried to like RSVP to something? Next
Speaker 2: time you get you have to RSVP to something, but
Speaker 2: no first of all, or you can put yes first.
Speaker 2: The evite is then immediately all over you to buy
Speaker 2: them a present. Oh I know. I saw I just went.
Speaker 3: I just rcp'd for a Christmas party and it was
Speaker 3: like Amazon, Yeah, it's link stams and I'm like, I'm
Speaker 3: not bringing al like this is they have like eighty
Speaker 3: five people.
Speaker 2: That come to this yeah present. Yes, it's not a
Speaker 2: registry and they don't want that. That's so weird.
Speaker 3: So let's just not use evite anymore. I think that's
Speaker 3: a goody six Like what are we doing?
Speaker 2: So I got an invite to somebody to a birthday
Speaker 2: party with a lot of people are invited, Oh my god,
Speaker 2: I want to Okay, they keep the list open because
Speaker 2: that's the only reason to do that, because I want
Speaker 2: to see who's coming. I think, so, I think there
Speaker 2: was I think the list was open. Okay, so this
Speaker 2: is somebody who I'm not friends with. It's just it's
Speaker 2: somebody that I know. I would say, I haven't laid
Speaker 2: eyes on them in person in like fifteen years.
Speaker 3: Oh oh, I wait, Oh it's a birthday party. Okay,
Speaker 3: I I got invited to a Christmas party. Oh remember
Speaker 3: chip Chinery. That's a different one that.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, we all used to get invited to
Speaker 2: every Chip Chinery.
Speaker 3: Were still invited to that. Okay, maybe we'll go to that.
Speaker 3: Oh that's hilarious. Okay, And remember how we would always
Speaker 3: get in to Retta's pink party.
Speaker 2: I still get invited to that, you do. I don't
Speaker 2: think she had one this.
Speaker 3: Past year, or I'm off the list, but I think
Speaker 3: sometimes she skips. I usually make the cut on that one.
Speaker 2: But yeah, we got to go to the chip We
Speaker 2: got to go to that because was it not you? Who?
Speaker 3: Who was it? The hooked up in the bathroom of
Speaker 3: a Chip Chenery Christmas party?
Speaker 2: And we're gonna come back to evite but now probably
Speaker 2: our mutual friend.
Speaker 3: No I don't think it's who you're thinking. I think
Speaker 3: it's our other mutual friend.
Speaker 2: Oh.
Speaker 3: I don't know exactly what happened, but somebody like randomly
Speaker 3: disappeared and I swear I think you were there. And
Speaker 3: then they came out all like flustered and they're like,
Speaker 3: I just blah blah blah, somebody in the bathroom. Oh
Speaker 3: my god, it was a little out of character. Actually
Speaker 3: it wasn't. It wasn't who you're thinking. So I don't
Speaker 3: know what the fuck anyway, interesting.
Speaker 2: So okay. So here's the thing about the Evite though,
Speaker 2: So okay, yes, you can go shopping if you're going
Speaker 2: to go. Also, Evite is very annoying. After the event.
Speaker 2: They just start you for pictures, like you're really going
Speaker 2: to take pictures, and then like, listen, I'm not a
Speaker 2: professional photographer. I'm not please upload all your photos that
Speaker 2: you No, fuck off Evite. I'm busy. But here's their
Speaker 2: new thing. So I had to rs vp'd no, and honestly,
Speaker 2: I RSVP'd no. Oh, by the way, this party is tonight.
Speaker 2: That's so funny. Oh shit, Okay, I'm not going. Ok
Speaker 2: And while we're at it, since this is bored af
Speaker 2: and we can we can talk about all the aspects
Speaker 2: of this. I was feeling, you know, when you get invited,
Speaker 2: anytime you get invited to something, everybody, this is human nature.
Speaker 2: You feel a little like a little obligated because you're like, well,
Speaker 2: they took they wanted to invite me, So now I
Speaker 2: feel like I have to have a reason to not
Speaker 2: leg But yes, but I had talked to this person.
Speaker 2: Though this is a little different because I talked to
Speaker 2: this person and they said, hey, I invited you. Okay,
Speaker 2: let me go back. When I first got the invite,
Speaker 2: it was up to my text, which is always so weird,
Speaker 2: and I I kind of ignored it because I swear
Speaker 2: to God. At first I thought it was an accident
Speaker 2: because I haven't seen this person so long. I was like, oh,
Speaker 2: I know they be thinking of me. You know of
Speaker 2: this person. I'm not friends that you're not friends with them,
Speaker 2: but you know of them. But anyway, so I was like,
Speaker 2: oh huh, And then I didn't answer, and then I
Speaker 2: got another thing from their assistant saying, hey, I sent
Speaker 2: you in evite. Did you get it? And I was like, oh,
Speaker 2: I got it, but I guess can you resend it?
Speaker 2: Because I don't know what happened to it, and she
Speaker 2: said sure, and then she resent it. Then I talked
Speaker 2: to the person. She was like, I invited you to
Speaker 2: my birthday and I was like, oh, okay, dying to
Speaker 2: know who this is.
Speaker 3: I know you can't tell me this, but you will
Speaker 3: tell me off air, but like I really am sight
Speaker 3: like is it a famous person?
Speaker 2: No, they're not really famous. Here. I'm going to text
Speaker 2: it to you just so just to put you out.
Speaker 2: I know it's going to Yeah, it's gonna bug me. Okay,
Speaker 2: I'm sending it to you right now. Yeah, okay, I
Speaker 2: got it. Got it. So, so when she was talking
Speaker 2: to me and she was like, oh, I would love
Speaker 2: for you to come to this to my party, and
Speaker 2: I was like, I said, well, will I know anybody there? Like,
Speaker 2: I don't think I know any of your friends? And
Speaker 2: she was like, oh, I think you'll know like a
Speaker 2: few people, And in my mind I'm like, no, I won't.
Speaker 2: I'm only going to know her, and if I do
Speaker 2: know anybody, it's not going to be like a friend
Speaker 2: of mine. Right. So then I thought about it and
Speaker 2: I felt guilty because she invited me and was like,
Speaker 2: I really want you to come. I'd love to see you.
Speaker 2: And then just the other day, I've been going through
Speaker 2: some stuff. You know, I just lost my sweet Penelope,
Speaker 2: Penelope Pie, and I was like, you know what, I'm
Speaker 2: not going to I'm not going to a party the
Speaker 2: next night of somebody I don't know and don't want
Speaker 2: to go to. Absolutely not. And then I just was
Speaker 2: like be brave at RSVP no because I think I
Speaker 2: had RSVP'd maybe I met her inner New York and
Speaker 2: be like no, yes, like yeah from the meeting. So
Speaker 2: I wrote no, and I and I just sent it.
Speaker 2: So I get a thing back today six hours ago.
Speaker 2: Can't make it to blah blah blah's birthday party. We
Speaker 2: heard you can't make it to blah blah Blah's birthday party.
Speaker 2: Just because you won't be there in person doesn't mean
Speaker 2: you can't still send a little love that's sucking a
Speaker 2: little something from the heart. And then I got the
Speaker 2: Amazon and then and then under that, so it gives
Speaker 2: you Amazon shop now. So I'm wondering if there's if
Speaker 2: this is going to lead to a registry, and I'm
Speaker 2: going to click on it and tell you momentarily, but
Speaker 2: below that it says, everyone loves a gift card. Go
Speaker 2: fuck yourself, Go fuck yourself. Everyone loves a gift card.
Speaker 2: Fuck off, I'm not.
Speaker 3: Getting a gift cardnoxious. That is insanity. Yeah, that's absolute
Speaker 3: fucking crazy.
Speaker 2: Okay, is there a registry person doesn't need? No, I
Speaker 2: looked at it. I clicked on it and it says
Speaker 2: gift shop. And then I's just doing that ye shot
Speaker 2: by occasion, birthdays, new home, baby shower. No, no, she's
Speaker 2: not doing it. And Evite is pushing it. But it's like,
Speaker 2: stop forcing this consumerism that nobody asked for.
Speaker 3: Just because they have a deal with Amazon. Everything's one
Speaker 3: big fucking corporation. I finally get it, and I'm going
Speaker 3: to tell you something else. This right here, right now,
Speaker 3: we're going to break some news for us. Because we've
Speaker 3: been doing this show for a really long time. I
Speaker 3: have finally come around. What's today it is when we're
Speaker 3: recording this, it's November twenty second.
Speaker 2: Yes, this is the day that Kennedy died nineteen sixty three. Yeah. Oh, shape,
Speaker 2: Like I don't get it.
Speaker 3: Happy birthday Kennedy And you're like, no, no, no, that's
Speaker 3: not a birthday.
Speaker 2: Died opposite Yeah, terrible. Uh, I think that, Yeah, I
Speaker 2: get Okay.
Speaker 3: It's not that I didn't like him before, but now
Speaker 3: I totally get Bernie. It took me to this year
Speaker 3: to fully understand and appreciate Bernie Sanders.
Speaker 2: I thought we always liked him. We just didn't like
Speaker 2: the people that like him too much. We don't like Well,
Speaker 2: there's that.
Speaker 3: But I also was such a I was such a
Speaker 3: Hillary person, and I was so upset that I felt
Speaker 3: like he derailed some of that. But now as I've
Speaker 3: gotten older and life has gone on and gotten and
Speaker 3: there's a lot a couple other reasons, like he's very
Speaker 3: in bed with like the NRA. You know, he's kind
Speaker 3: of like wouldn't give up the guns because Vermont and
Speaker 3: all that. There's some stuff that I didn't like, love love,
Speaker 3: But now when I hear him speak, I like, I
Speaker 3: feel like it's just.
Speaker 2: A warm blanket around my shoulders.
Speaker 3: It's like a safe, like oh my god, like yeah,
Speaker 3: it is billions, the billionaires and the billionaires in the
Speaker 3: corporate like not that I didn't get it before, but
Speaker 3: I used to sort of think, like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: this is just how the world works.
Speaker 2: This is just our country. It's always been this like
Speaker 2: get over it, stop with this. Now, I get it.
Speaker 2: It took me a really long time, and I like,
Speaker 2: I get it, I understand, I get it, and I
Speaker 2: really and yeah, like it's not that I didn't like
Speaker 2: Bernie as it as a human, I mean, he was
Speaker 2: on the good side of things right for the most part,
Speaker 2: but like I just was sort of like, oh, you're
Speaker 2: being crazy now, and you know, yeah, the Bernie bros.
Speaker 3: Are the killery people and all that. It got confusing.
Speaker 3: But now I'm like, hmmm mm hmm. We need him
Speaker 3: on that wall. We do, we do, really do. We
Speaker 3: need someone younger on that wall. But that's very so
Speaker 3: that's guided by him, and that is just that we.
Speaker 2: Don't even get political on this show, but.
Speaker 3: We're eve got us there with their bullshit corporation nonsense.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, okay, I have one more thing. Do you
Speaker 2: want me to do do another thing? Or do you
Speaker 2: do you want to get to your story?
Speaker 3: Okay, well I'll tell you this really quick because it's
Speaker 3: good's I mean, well, you can whatever you want, whatever
Speaker 3: you'd like, all right, I'll I'll.
Speaker 2: Just do one more thing and then I'll be done,
Speaker 2: and then I'll just be on the receiving end of
Speaker 2: your stories and build on them. Don't think I'm I'm
Speaker 2: going to build on them. Okay, it's just a Remember
Speaker 2: I told you I had a song lyric thing for you. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 2: so I want to I want to bring up this
Speaker 2: song lyric thing. And I went and looked at it
Speaker 2: and brought up the lyrics to look at so we
Speaker 2: could talk about it. And I realized it's the shortest song,
Speaker 2: like it is such a dumb ass song and it
Speaker 2: only has like one one real verse. But I think
Speaker 2: you're gonna like this. Okay, so this is bread. Do
Speaker 2: you remember? This is from the seventies and the song
Speaker 2: is I want to make it with you? Remember this?
Speaker 3: Don't remember this because I think sort of a blind spoty.
Speaker 2: Have you ever tried really reaching out? All the other said,
Speaker 2: do you remember the song? Nope? Okay, keep going on,
Speaker 2: maybe climbing on rain mos. But baby here goes. And
Speaker 2: then there's another Oh it's called a pre chorus. But
Speaker 2: the chorus is I want to make it with you. Okay,
Speaker 2: I want to make it with you love. Yes, yes,
Speaker 2: I want to make it with you means I want
Speaker 2: to fuck you. And it's so it's such a gross
Speaker 2: song and I just want to I just want to
Speaker 2: talk through this beginning lyric, Hey have you ever tried
Speaker 2: really reach out for the other side? What does that mean?
Speaker 2: A person who died, like reaching out for the other
Speaker 2: side of what? And it kind of this next line
Speaker 2: sort of goes towards that, like I may be climbing
Speaker 2: on rainbows, so that means like, hey, this probably won't
Speaker 2: happen because you've already passed on to the other side.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 3: I think what it is is like this guy is
Speaker 3: trying to be like, I'm just an everyday guy. I'm
Speaker 3: just I just live in a studio apartment, and you're
Speaker 3: like a princess, You're the uptown girl. I think it's
Speaker 3: what they're saying, like would you reach out like I'm
Speaker 3: a mechanic, I'm over here doing this, I'm over here, hey, yeah,
Speaker 3: island or he's like some kind of hippie like I'm
Speaker 3: sliding around on rainbows and I know you don't like that.
Speaker 3: You've got your feet on the ground and you in
Speaker 3: your super princessy townhouse or whatever.
Speaker 2: Okay, well, well the pre courus is dreams. They're for
Speaker 2: those who sleep and life is for us to keep.
Speaker 2: And if you're wondering what this is leading to, Yes,
Speaker 2: I want to make it with you. I really think
Speaker 2: we could make it girl. Okay, then okay, trying to
Speaker 2: get money from her. He wants to borrow money. I
Speaker 2: don't even think it's have sex.
Speaker 3: I think he's like, I'd like a loan, please, so
Speaker 3: we can start that business idea that I had.
Speaker 2: I think you could be onto something. Because here's a
Speaker 2: verse two and this is this is it. These are
Speaker 2: the only other original lyrics. No, you don't know me, Well, okay,
Speaker 2: so you met somebody, so this is all that kind
Speaker 2: of free love, like you don't really know this person,
Speaker 2: but you kind of sniff out the money situation, right
Speaker 2: and you're just the guy. You're just a guy, and.
Speaker 3: She's I have a dry cleaning business and we could
Speaker 3: put both our names on it is all I'm saying.
Speaker 2: And he says, and every little thing, only time will
Speaker 2: tell what what does that even mean? If you believe
Speaker 2: the things that I do and we'll see it through.
Speaker 2: First of all, why the and it just should be
Speaker 2: if you believe the things that I do, we'll see
Speaker 2: it through. It shouldn't be if you believe the things
Speaker 2: that I do and we'll see it. What does that
Speaker 2: even mean? It's totally a business trendsit. I mean that
Speaker 2: is what it is. Like. I want to make it
Speaker 2: with you. I want to make it big. We got this.
Speaker 2: I want to be your manager. But also I may
Speaker 2: want to have sex with you with no strings. Maybe
Speaker 2: I get because life can be shorter long, and love
Speaker 2: can be right or wrong. That makes no sense. He's
Speaker 2: going against his own Oh love can be right or wrong. Okay,
Speaker 2: so this is the only other part that's different. So
Speaker 2: this is the second pre chorus is the one I
Speaker 2: just said life can be shorter long, which means like, hey,
Speaker 2: it's life is short. Let's just like have sex and
Speaker 2: give me money. Because then he says love can be
Speaker 2: right or wrong, meaning like I don't know you might
Speaker 2: be married already. I'm not worried about that. And if
Speaker 2: I chose the one, I'd like to help me through.
Speaker 2: So please support my business. Please, yes, please invest in
Speaker 2: my dry cleaning business, and I will put your name
Speaker 2: on it, even though I'll say I'm putting your name
Speaker 2: on it. But let's not get business.
Speaker 3: We'll leave your name on the loan. But maybe not
Speaker 3: on the like sidewalk right unless you want to do.
Speaker 2: Not on the building, and not on the actual legal paperwork,
Speaker 2: not on the deed, you know what I mean, just
Speaker 2: on the loan that you take for me.
Speaker 3: He's one of those certain bands that just like slipped
Speaker 3: the sub blind spot because I was too young or
Speaker 3: if my dad wasn't into it when I was in this,
Speaker 3: you know, like a child right then, I I just
Speaker 3: didn't know it's we were really it was Dolly and
Speaker 3: Willie and the Little to Beat, Like I knew the classics,
Speaker 3: but there was like some seventies hippie shit that like
Speaker 3: really upset my dad.
Speaker 2: Really like that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah he was. He was a cool dude,
Speaker 3: but he was He did not like hip. He didn't
Speaker 3: like that kind of shit. He was like, I don't
Speaker 3: understand why people don't just.
Speaker 2: Work like he was a little bit that, you know
Speaker 2: what I mean, people just sit around making love all
Speaker 2: the time.
Speaker 3: Why don't you get a job, make a job, and
Speaker 3: which I sort of became too like like a little bit.
Speaker 2: It was like, oh my god, everybody's just gonna have
Speaker 2: sex all day and it is.
Speaker 3: My dad didn't really drink. He never did drugs. It
Speaker 3: was I have no idea how my parents got together.
Speaker 3: My mom loved all the drugs, so like, I think
Speaker 3: I told you that one time where he was very,
Speaker 3: very square and I was too. And then I went
Speaker 3: to college and then I like let loose, like freshman
Speaker 3: year of college, like I would just I was so
Speaker 3: excited to be wild and totally different that I would
Speaker 3: like send pig. I would show pictures on Christmas break
Speaker 3: like this is me with Long Island iced tea. Can
Speaker 3: you believe it? And I remember my dad took me aside.
Speaker 3: He was like, do not become lack your mother.
Speaker 2: I was like very upset about it because I was like,
Speaker 2: I feel like I don't do anything fun.
Speaker 3: I didn't even have sex until I was like a junior. Like,
Speaker 3: I believe me, I'm the most controlled person, so like,
Speaker 3: let me have fun at a frat party.
Speaker 2: So I just felt like I was caught between two worlds.
Speaker 2: I think I landed somewhere sort of in the middle.
Speaker 2: I think I just sort of was like I can
Speaker 2: have fun within.
Speaker 3: You know, reason, But I'm all there's always that extra
Speaker 3: voice that's like I don't do that, don't not do much.
Speaker 2: That's probably interesting.
Speaker 3: It's totally good, I guess, but sometimes I just want
Speaker 3: to somebody just want to do mushrooms and sit on
Speaker 3: a mountain, but you have I have done that. I
Speaker 3: didn't sit on a mountain, but I did take a
Speaker 3: walk around Hollywood. Same thing, yeah, same idea. Trash, mountain, trees,
Speaker 3: garbage cans, ebbs.
Speaker 2: I feel like you went to you. I think one
Speaker 2: of your mushroom trips was like you were in nature.
Speaker 3: I've had a couple. I've had a few, and they
Speaker 3: were all wonderful. It really didn't matter. In fact, the
Speaker 3: better one was sort of Hollywood with like trash. The
Speaker 3: one that I didn't enjoy was at the beach. Yeah,
Speaker 3: the beach, That's what I didn't like that one. But
Speaker 3: I think it's it's depending on what your mood is.
Speaker 2: Witnesses. I don't think i'd be kid. Yeah, you're like,
Speaker 2: it just depends on the quality of the drugs. You know,
Speaker 2: if it's good meth, then that's like a right, you know,
Speaker 2: if it's good mouth your teeth only sort of crumble. Yeah, god,
Speaker 2: uh that's crazy bread. What other? What was their biggest song?
Speaker 2: What would I? I know the band? I just can't uh,
Speaker 2: their biggest song was Oh my God, Uh, hold on,
Speaker 2: really it's hat Jude. I'm like, I don't think so
Speaker 2: read band uh songs. Hold on I because I'm forgetting
Speaker 2: their very biggest hit, Oh Everything I Own, See Everything
Speaker 2: I Own is alone from you Own True. No, that's
Speaker 2: a different song. No, that's a different song. I was
Speaker 2: thinking of a Linda Ronstadt song, I Love Baby, I'm
Speaker 2: want you baby, I'm a meed do you You're the
Speaker 2: only one to care about you know? That song?
Speaker 3: Kind of again, the Little blind Spot I love though.
Speaker 3: I think I'm gonna love you for a long time,
Speaker 3: a long long time. That's not used to listen for.
Speaker 3: I know that one was just oh I thought you
Speaker 3: were saying. The other one was London.
Speaker 2: Okay, go when you have a story. I have a
Speaker 2: kind of a crazy story, So I go.
Speaker 3: I get invited by speaking of corporations, cair Amount Studios invited.
Speaker 3: You know, I'm in the critics thing, and we get
Speaker 3: to go to these like little parties, and I.
Speaker 2: Don't often go. I've been.
Speaker 3: I've been going a little this year, but I know
Speaker 3: the ones that I want to go to that are
Speaker 3: going to be too crowded, and the ones to go
Speaker 3: to like the George Clooney when I told you about
Speaker 3: last week, which is super fun. So this week on
Speaker 3: Thursday night, actually it was crazy. I'm like, I'm gonna
Speaker 3: fucking go to this. They had a little cocktail party
Speaker 3: at the London Hotel just in West Hollywood and went
Speaker 3: with my friend and it was too It was for
Speaker 3: the movie because they're trying to get awards, like nominations,
Speaker 3: you know, for the movie roof Man with Channing Tatum
Speaker 3: terristin duns Okay. So we're there and it was really good,
Speaker 3: like shrimp, like very nicely catered, special cock tit. I mean,
Speaker 3: I like that kind of shit. And it wasn't that
Speaker 3: crowded because it's raining and Channing Tatum comes in and
Speaker 3: it's he's supposed to be there, but there weren't that
Speaker 3: many people there.
Speaker 2: So we're excited.
Speaker 3: And usually how it works is the publicist brings the
Speaker 3: stars q one unquote around to the CIA, you know,
Speaker 3: our group and introduces like it's a very civilized thing.
Speaker 3: They'll be like, this is Cecily Nobler life from Hollywood Radio.
Speaker 3: This is Channing you know, Like that's usually how they
Speaker 3: do it. It's the best way to do it. They
Speaker 3: didn't do that this time. So Channing comes in and
Speaker 3: some scraggly people. I'm not gonna lie. Some of the
Speaker 3: people there, I don't know who they were invited through,
Speaker 3: but they some of them seemed like Papa rots. I
Speaker 3: don't know what the fuck was going on. But they descend.
Speaker 3: And this happens at premieeres. You've been to premiers, Like
Speaker 3: a star walks in and the whole room just moves
Speaker 3: like a black hole to that star, you know, it
Speaker 3: just collapses. So it's doing and I'm like embarrassed. For
Speaker 3: some reason, I get it in my head that I'm like,
Speaker 3: we're channing. This is just it's ridiculous. This town we
Speaker 3: live in, this industry.
Speaker 2: It's so stupid. It's just ridiculous, you know, so stupid.
Speaker 2: And I was even going to say, like, it's so
Speaker 2: pathetic for like Los Angeles. You think they would hear,
Speaker 2: you would think it's so people would be like, yes,
Speaker 2: we see celebrities at like seven eleven. It does we
Speaker 2: don't need to like assault them.
Speaker 3: Yes, So I'm like, okay with my friend, I'm like,
Speaker 3: let's just stay over here. If it come, If it happens,
Speaker 3: it happens. If he comes around, we'll say hi, and
Speaker 3: then if not, like, I'm not going to stand in line.
Speaker 2: I'm this just so weird. So eventually that does happen,
Speaker 2: and he's sort of shaking hands. Everybody's going up to him,
Speaker 2: and then he turns around to me and he's like, hi,
Speaker 2: sweetheart or something like that. It was sweet.
Speaker 3: I like that Texas, I like a little peachey and
Speaker 3: he's like hello, and he you know, shakes my hand,
Speaker 3: and I wasn't even like, you know, trying that hard,
Speaker 3: so it felt really good and I was like hi.
Speaker 3: And then all I could think, because I'm so in
Speaker 3: my head, all I was like, I tried to make
Speaker 3: a joke, so I go, do you know all these
Speaker 3: people like obviously that's a joke, and he goes, oh, no, no, no.
Speaker 2: I don't. I don't know. I don't know that.
Speaker 3: And I was like, oh no no. I was told
Speaker 3: I go no, no, no. I was totally kidding, like
Speaker 3: of course you wouldn't, I mean, And I didn't then
Speaker 3: want to make fun of all the like scraggly people,
Speaker 3: because not all of them were some were just journalists whatever.
Speaker 3: But I was like no, no, no, I I was
Speaker 3: just kidding. I just was sort of noting how crazy
Speaker 3: this is. I was like, is this exhausting for you?
Speaker 3: Like is it weird? And he and he stayed first
Speaker 3: of all, so cute, so nice, and he was just like,
Speaker 3: it's not really exhausting.
Speaker 2: It's just a matter of how long you do it.
Speaker 3: It's like I can do things for kind of spurts
Speaker 3: at a time, and then I get kind of drained.
Speaker 2: But he's like, I love meeting.
Speaker 3: He goes, I know a lot of the people from
Speaker 3: junkets over the years, and I love it, Like this
Speaker 3: is part of the job and it's.
Speaker 2: Actually really interesting for me to meet people. And he's like,
Speaker 2: and I used to just like build, how you know, nail?
Speaker 2: What did he say?
Speaker 3: I would nail, like put nails and boards in Florida
Speaker 3: at one point in the hot sun.
Speaker 2: He's like, this is pretty easy.
Speaker 3: Like he was he kind of kind of like really
Speaker 3: perfectly put into words what I was trying to say.
Speaker 2: But he did it in such a kind way, do
Speaker 2: you know what I mean? Like I'm making fun.
Speaker 3: Of the whole industry, and he's like kind of fun
Speaker 3: and actually I'm really appreciated.
Speaker 2: So way that's nice. I know, he was so cute.
Speaker 2: And then he was like, do you want to take
Speaker 2: a picture, and he held the picture for so long
Speaker 2: because I was like, okay, oh my teeth looked weird
Speaker 2: in that one.
Speaker 3: He goes, let's do one. We'll do one with teeth,
Speaker 3: one with no teeth, one with flash. Like he was
Speaker 3: the one guiding it. He wasn't like, oh my god,
Speaker 3: let's get it really done.
Speaker 2: I felt.
Speaker 3: I started feeling self conscious because we kept taught. We
Speaker 3: were talking about like movies we like this year, and
Speaker 3: then people were swarming around us.
Speaker 2: It was so weird. It's like when you're talking to
Speaker 2: a celebrity. That's what it feels like to be that
Speaker 2: celebrity because every all eyes are on you, you know, right.
Speaker 2: So I started getting.
Speaker 3: Self conscious and I was like, oh, I don't want
Speaker 3: to hold you whatever, and he's like, you're good, don't
Speaker 3: You're good?
Speaker 2: Like You're like I don't want to hold You're like.
Speaker 3: I do want to hold you, yes, I mean I
Speaker 3: wanted a magic mic the fuck out of me right now?
Speaker 3: Did you take your like, listen, it's been awesome that
Speaker 3: you're so cool, But what about a dance?
Speaker 2: How about a dance.
Speaker 3: But anyway, we got a really cute photo and it's
Speaker 3: not that great of a story, but it was just
Speaker 3: funny because my neurosis was on such high alert about
Speaker 3: his feelings when I was just completely projecting them, and
Speaker 3: he's like, it's all good, like this is this is
Speaker 3: a fun way to spend a couple hours, right, Like
Speaker 3: you have pain in your hand, like.
Speaker 2: You know what I mean.
Speaker 3: Like it's just like you're you're okay, and we're all okay,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, I'm not okay.
Speaker 2: What if I just started crying. I'm not okay, Channing
Speaker 2: You're okay, but I'm not. I have some stuff going on.
Speaker 2: I mean that is kind of what it felt like.
Speaker 2: Like I was just like, well, yeah, I mean but
Speaker 2: but then you think, like he's got stuff going on too.
Speaker 3: He could we don't know what his leg you know,
Speaker 3: he goes through breakups just like everybody else. He loses
Speaker 3: people in his pami, you know, like he's just a
Speaker 3: human being going to work that makes money, doing a
Speaker 3: fun thing for sure, but he just and you know that,
Speaker 3: I'm very big on not like praising someone for just
Speaker 3: being a decent person just because they're famous, Because I
Speaker 3: hate that.
Speaker 2: It's like he was amazing just because he was nice.
Speaker 2: But he was really nice, so I want to give
Speaker 2: that to him, because they're not always and his was
Speaker 2: like super genuine. Have we heard bad things about him?
Speaker 2: I don't think so.
Speaker 3: I think there was some not a great like end
Speaker 3: of marriage type thing, but I think that there's going
Speaker 3: to be a lot of ex wives and husbands, and
Speaker 3: in fact, I almost everyone I know that's been divorced
Speaker 3: that's had a shitty thing to say about an axe,
Speaker 3: So I don't.
Speaker 2: Think it's not. But anyway, that was my little, my
Speaker 2: little weird Thursday. That's sweet. Were there any other stars there?
Speaker 2: Kirsten Dunst was there, but I couldn't.
Speaker 3: She was she was swarmed too, and she kind of
Speaker 3: stayed in one place and and it was just hard
Speaker 3: to get to but she looked really pretty and really
Speaker 3: all she was very good in the movie. And I
Speaker 3: would have said that, but what I really wanted to
Speaker 3: say is your husband is so fucking amazing, but that
Speaker 3: would be that feel bad, like you're here.
Speaker 2: For my movie. Who's her husband?
Speaker 3: Her husband is Jesse Plemmons, who's just like, yeah, I
Speaker 3: have control talented. She's good she's like an she's like
Speaker 3: a B plus and he's like an A plus.
Speaker 2: Doesn't he remind you a lot of uh Seymour Hoffman.
Speaker 3: Oh, Phillip Simmerhaf, I know, I get more of like
Speaker 3: a maybe Philip Seimura Hoffman and Matt Damon had.
Speaker 2: Like a little baby, a little baby. Remember when that
Speaker 2: used to be people's stand up. I'm like, if Travolta
Speaker 2: and Pee Wee Herman got together and had a baby.
Speaker 2: My god, do you ever like when people, I mean,
Speaker 2: early days of stand up? There was there's a woman
Speaker 2: who Okay, so this woman was married to a friend
Speaker 2: of mine. So I'm not I'm not remember, I'm not
Speaker 2: making fun of her. Judy Carter. Yeah, oh yeah, oh god.
Speaker 2: So Judya Carter was married for a long time. I
Speaker 2: went to her wedding actually about this, wow, yeah, to
Speaker 2: a friend of I mean, I won't really say my
Speaker 2: friend because she's not really my friend, but she was
Speaker 2: John's John worked for her. This woman named Gina. She
Speaker 2: has the acting book or the comedy book or is
Speaker 2: that Judy to you? I know that you know that's Judy.
Speaker 2: That's Judy Carter. So Judy Carter had that and that's
Speaker 2: which is what I'm saying. Because so she wrote this
Speaker 2: book that was basically the the Comedy Bible. I think
Speaker 2: she might have called it the Comedy Bible. She had
Speaker 2: a lot of comedy jokes, like people got their jokes
Speaker 2: in there. No, that was Judy Brown was the Aspen Lady.
Speaker 2: Judy Brown's also a manager, and she wrote a book
Speaker 2: that had all these people's jokes in it. Okay, got it,
Speaker 2: got it. It was like some comedy Bible, Yes, but
Speaker 2: this is different. This was I'll tell you the Comedy
Speaker 2: Bible book by Judy Carter. Uh. I mean maybe she
Speaker 2: also did a book with but anyway, her main book
Speaker 2: was this one that was how to do stand up
Speaker 2: comedy basically, and everybody and people took her classes and
Speaker 2: the opening thing was I know what you're thinking. So
Speaker 2: that was the thing that people and it was there
Speaker 2: were be either like I look like if this person,
Speaker 2: this person had a baby. And it was so sad
Speaker 2: because around the time that, like I started, everybody opened
Speaker 2: their act that way and it was so hack and
Speaker 2: half the time it would just be so forced too,
Speaker 2: because you'd be like, what, no, you don't look like
Speaker 2: if yes, are you used to when you wrote this
Speaker 2: joke fifteen years ago. Maybe that'd be like me.
Speaker 3: Going on stage and be like, I know, alanis I
Speaker 3: see it?
Speaker 2: I got it? Calm down, Yes, yeah, we talked about that.
Speaker 2: The other thing that I hated.
Speaker 3: There's a comic that we both know. I mean, I
Speaker 3: don't know if that's this this woman used to go
Speaker 3: up And I don't want to make it too specific,
Speaker 3: but I always hated it. Be like my dad's Mexican
Speaker 3: and my mom's Swedish, so that.
Speaker 2: Means I have like a really clean you know, it
Speaker 2: was just some.
Speaker 3: Bullshit stereotype, two things put together and it just and
Speaker 3: she wasn't kidding, like she wasn't being anti comedy. It
Speaker 3: was like for real joke, Oh my god, Like remember
Speaker 3: how I told you I wanted to mine be like, ugh,
Speaker 3: my mom's blah, my dad's Polish, which means most of
Speaker 3: my family perished in Auschwitz.
Speaker 2: Anyway, what else? Like just really specific to my life
Speaker 2: and not wait what my mom's from the Ukraine?
Speaker 3: My dad was Polish, so it means they were in
Speaker 3: a shuttle together and they were probably relatives. AnyWho, what
Speaker 3: else is in the news?
Speaker 2: What? But hold on? I found this book that you're
Speaker 2: talking about. It's called Soup Judy Brown. It's joke Soup,
Speaker 2: twelve hundred and seventeen of the funniest jokes from the
Speaker 2: best comedians. It because in this outstanding comical volume. And
Speaker 2: I do remember that so many of us were like,
Speaker 2: why are my jokes in there? I know, yeah, are
Speaker 2: jokes from some of the world's funniest contemporary comedians as
Speaker 2: well as the old favorites, are gathered together to create
Speaker 2: one gigantic LaughFest. The jokes and one liners are rain
Speaker 2: according to subject, so it doubles as both the freshest
Speaker 2: joke book for fans and as a must have reference
Speaker 2: for cutting edge jokes. Oh my god, Okay, flip to okay,
Speaker 2: don't I'm gonna choose a wait. Do you have the
Speaker 2: book and you see the whole thing? Oh, because I
Speaker 2: was going to say, like, flip to page eight. See. No,
Speaker 2: I don't have the book. But it has nine ratings
Speaker 2: on Goodreads and one review, and it's got out of
Speaker 2: five stars. It has two point seven eight stars.
Speaker 3: Somebody was mad, that could be You never know how
Speaker 3: that can go. You never know who's mad at you.
Speaker 2: There's that is one review. And it's clearly from a
Speaker 2: comic because like the thumbnail, like is a person holding
Speaker 2: a mic and it just says it's three stars, which
Speaker 2: I've never understood reviewing something. If you're going to get
Speaker 2: the com stars, you gave it three stars. Like what
Speaker 2: if it's one of the comics that's jokes is in
Speaker 2: there three stars?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm not giving it five. Sorry, it's just not
Speaker 3: that good. It's just it's just a collection of nonsense,
Speaker 3: this person writes. I've read one other of her books.
Speaker 3: These are good joke books, like how they are organized
Speaker 3: by topic. I picked this up for five bucks at
Speaker 3: a US store and it was worth it. Maybe find
Speaker 3: about two out of ten jokes that are killer. But
Speaker 3: that's on par for jokes. We don't all laugh at
Speaker 3: the same things, now, do we.
Speaker 1: Also?
Speaker 3: I don't believe in jokes in the written form. I
Speaker 3: don't think that you can. They don't read the same
Speaker 3: if you don't have the comedians saying them. It's like
Speaker 3: Norm McDonald, if you read the Norm McDonald joke as
Speaker 3: on on a piece of paper, you're not going to
Speaker 3: laugh the same way as you are if he's saying
Speaker 3: it right.
Speaker 2: I saw him. There was a thing making the rounds.
Speaker 3: Okay, this is gonna be a little edgy, so I
Speaker 3: don't want people to get mad.
Speaker 2: But he could.
Speaker 3: So this was making the rounds. He Norm went, God,
Speaker 3: you know what I sent it to someone? Maybe, Oh
Speaker 3: I can't play it.
Speaker 2: Damn it. I can't play it for you because you
Speaker 2: won't hear it. Why just tell it to me.
Speaker 3: Okay, but it's not going to be as funny if
Speaker 3: I say it. Then when he said it, but he
Speaker 3: so Norm went on Larry King live right mm hmm,
Speaker 3: and he goes, is there anything that you wouldn't want
Speaker 3: the world to like know about you? Like, are there
Speaker 3: any things whatever? And he was like, well, you mean
Speaker 3: like like that. I'm in the closet and Larry's like, wait,
Speaker 3: are you coming out? And he was like, no, that
Speaker 3: would be the thing I wouldn't want people to know.
Speaker 3: You just said were the things And he's like wait,
Speaker 3: So Larry King was not really getting it, and he's like, wait,
Speaker 3: so are you saying And he's like, no judgment here,
Speaker 3: but are you saying that you're gay? And he's like, oh, Larry,
Speaker 3: I'm saying that would be the thing that I wouldn't
Speaker 3: want to talk about He's like, I'm not.
Speaker 2: It was so fucking.
Speaker 3: Brilliant, and it took finally when Larry got that he
Speaker 3: was just being absurd, you know, he finally and then
Speaker 3: like Norm kind of gave him like a little wink,
Speaker 3: you know, like the impish wink but Larry, and then
Speaker 3: Larry started laughing. I mean he got he but he
Speaker 3: didn't understand at first what was happening.
Speaker 2: That's our Larry. It's just that's our Larry King. But no,
Speaker 2: but Norm just as quick. I mean, this is so
Speaker 2: early Borday f days. But remember when you wouldn't you
Speaker 2: didn't want me to go out with Norm. It didn't
Speaker 2: matter because he never called.
Speaker 3: But I called you from a thing and he'd asked
Speaker 3: for my number and he asked me out and I
Speaker 3: called you immediately, and you were like, under no circumstances.
Speaker 2: Do you remember that? Yes, You're like you cannot go, and.
Speaker 3: You're like he's crazy, and I go, I don't care,
Speaker 3: you know, I like that, and you're like no, we're
Speaker 3: talking like Urine in Jars crazy And I was like,
Speaker 3: I don't care. I think I told you, okay, I
Speaker 3: won't go out with him. And then he just didn't call,
Speaker 3: so it didn't matter.
Speaker 2: Which because you were like, well, I won't go out
Speaker 2: with him unless he calls.
Speaker 3: Unless he calls immediately at any time, and it could
Speaker 3: be within years. I get a five year period from
Speaker 3: now into five years from now that he's allowed to call,
Speaker 3: or ten years.
Speaker 2: But he didn't. It was I was so excited. I
Speaker 2: was like, oh my god, this is so ridiculous.
Speaker 3: Was like two thousand and five, I want to say
Speaker 3: two four thou five, and you're like no. He was
Speaker 3: a strange guy, I know, but he was charming. He
Speaker 3: was cute back then too, Like he was cute, you
Speaker 3: could just.
Speaker 2: Cute, tall, dark, He was very funny. My favorite thing
Speaker 2: about Norm, which I've always told you, is that he
Speaker 2: just didn't He had this I don't give a fuck attitude.
Speaker 2: So he would do a joke. He would always leave
Speaker 2: on a down note. Yes, so he would do it.
Speaker 2: He would never almost every comedian, I've never heard of
Speaker 2: a comedian that would just be fine getting off like
Speaker 2: between jokes. He loved it. Usually loved Yeah. He'd be
Speaker 2: like good night, and you're like it. You know, it's
Speaker 2: funny that you say that.
Speaker 3: I meant to tell you this and then we'll go
Speaker 3: but this, this is interest, this is new. We've really no,
Speaker 3: it's all been pretty new today. Good for as we
Speaker 3: work hard. But I was what, you know, I love
Speaker 3: the podcast Fly on the Fly on the Wall, Fly
Speaker 3: on the Wall with David Spade and Dana Carbian. They
Speaker 3: don't give a fuck and they have mostly us and
Speaker 3: it well and they so they had Louis c.
Speaker 2: K on not too long ago, and I was like,
Speaker 2: I got to see what he has to say.
Speaker 3: First off, Louis is one of those guys that sits
Speaker 3: around at a comedy club and really wants to talk
Speaker 3: about the craftsmanship of joke writing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's really fucking annoying. He's annoying. He's already
Speaker 2: annoying for reasons that we know, but also.
Speaker 3: Just watching him just like like what's the word where
Speaker 3: you're just like, oh, yeah, yes.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, oh my god.
Speaker 3: He told a story about how he was I guess
Speaker 3: he was writing on SNL maybe I guess, yes, years ago. Yeah,
Speaker 3: and he told a story because he's like, I always
Speaker 3: wanted to thank you. The story was a compliment to himself.
Speaker 3: So he's like, Dana, I remember writing this story when
Speaker 3: you were doing some impression. Whatever the impression was.
Speaker 2: Oh, it was of like like some newscaster or whatever,
Speaker 2: like announcing that someone had died. Okay, So the joke
Speaker 2: was like so and so like da and then he
Speaker 2: was like and then there's a beat, and then you
Speaker 2: here's this another part of the joke, right, like Dana
Speaker 2: Carvey didn't already know that. So he goes, you came
Speaker 2: up to me and you killed both jokes. You did
Speaker 2: the first thing, you waited like I told you to,
Speaker 2: and then you've got a second, big laugh. And you
Speaker 2: came up to me that night and you were like,
Speaker 2: thanks for the second laugh. Awesome. So he's giving.
Speaker 3: Himself a compliment. You can's being nice and he's like,
Speaker 3: oh cool, buddy, I'm glad that I gave you a compliment.
Speaker 3: I mean, it was just so weird. And it pans
Speaker 3: over to David Spade because the show is, you know,
Speaker 3: on YouTube, and David Spade, who's also an asshole, could
Speaker 3: not be bothered to even be in this conversation. So
Speaker 3: I don't know if it's because he's embarrassed that Louie's there,
Speaker 3: I don't. I doubt it, but I don't know or
Speaker 3: if he's just so fucking checked out. But he's like
Speaker 3: he just kept David Spade just kept going, yeah, cool compliments,
Speaker 3: and I.
Speaker 2: Was like, I don't even know who to root for
Speaker 2: in this moment. I love those two guys, not Louis,
Speaker 2: but I love you know, I love that show. But
Speaker 2: I'm sort of like, is David just totally checked out?
Speaker 2: Or are we loving how sarcastic and dry he is
Speaker 2: that kind of fun too, because it's kind of sexy
Speaker 2: and fun too, right, Not that has to be sexy.
Speaker 2: We don't have to have sex with everyone's cecily. You
Speaker 2: don't have to suck to everyone. That's funny. Don't know,
Speaker 2: but like I don't know. I just thought it was
Speaker 2: just funny.
Speaker 3: I'll send I'll send you the clip because it was
Speaker 3: just so noxious.
Speaker 2: I want to see it.
Speaker 3: The Craftsman and I and I really wrote a great
Speaker 3: joke and I really believe in not thank you Dana
Speaker 3: for like telling me how much you love my joke
Speaker 3: I need. And then he had he also lastly, he
Speaker 3: had a David's story because I guess he was auditioning
Speaker 3: for something else. Oh he was, Yeah, he was auditioning
Speaker 3: for something and he had to do a showcase and
Speaker 3: John Stewart was the host, and he was like, oh,
Speaker 3: they made us. Yeah, I had to go on first.
Speaker 3: It was like all these amazing comics and I had
Speaker 3: to go on first. And so the people that were
Speaker 3: supposed to be there to watch him. I think it
Speaker 3: was snl to be like on the show because the
Speaker 3: people that were there to watch him hadn't shown up yet.
Speaker 3: So John Stewart did like twenty extra minutes trying to
Speaker 3: buy him time so that they would be in the
Speaker 3: room when he auditioned, and he was like, sorry, dude,
Speaker 3: I got to put you up, and he's like okay.
Speaker 3: So while he was up, the people piled in, all
Speaker 3: the people that were supposed to be watching them, and
Speaker 3: they were kind of talking and not even listening to him.
Speaker 3: And then he said he heard David Spade go, oh,
Speaker 3: you got to listen to this guy. You got to
Speaker 3: listen to this guy. He's amazing.
Speaker 2: So another compliment to himself, but.
Speaker 3: In the showy yeah, so again, and so again Spade
Speaker 3: was like cool, like he's what are you even talking about?
Speaker 3: So then he goes and so I didn't get it.
Speaker 3: I get a call the next day that I didn't
Speaker 3: get the job, but they said, we love this guy.
Speaker 2: He's good for Conan.
Speaker 3: That's how I got Conan, which, by the way, he
Speaker 3: drove everyone crazy on Conan. As talented as Louis was,
Speaker 3: he was also a dick in the writer's room, and
Speaker 3: obviously people know about that.
Speaker 2: I'm not breaking ground here. Oh he was a dick.
Speaker 3: And anyway, I just thought that was funny because everyone's like, cool, cool,
Speaker 3: cool story, bro what else?
Speaker 2: It was so weird. I'm like, why are you even
Speaker 2: doing this podcast if you don't care? Because he's so
Speaker 2: used to like holding court with medians that when he's
Speaker 2: on with people that are bigger than he is, that
Speaker 2: really prop we don't care that much. It's probably kind
Speaker 2: of surprising to him.
Speaker 3: That's a really really good point he did. I saw
Speaker 3: him on THEO Vaughn as well. Uh, and he was
Speaker 3: just a THEO was just hanging on every word.
Speaker 2: Like yes, write more, yes.
Speaker 3: Like okay, everybody calmed up, Please don't say the word
Speaker 3: craft anyway. I think that's I think we got it
Speaker 3: all in there.
Speaker 2: I think we did. I think we can say hello
Speaker 2: to our friends, yes please, like Carlin Bastion. Oh yeah, Silvano, Jimitti,
Speaker 2: Sandra Sandra Green. Oh yeah you waited, you got two laughs,
Speaker 2: Let's do that. Collette Rock Exact. Thanks for making that happen,
Speaker 2: right right, yes jokes, Julie turn Friend.
Speaker 3: You say Turnbull and I say Turnbull, and you know what,
Speaker 3: You're right, it's Turnbull, Turnbull.
Speaker 2: Damn it. Sorry. And Victoria Blake and Andra Heard and Dick.
Speaker 3: Frolicker, Sean Boshpey, Kerrie Maller, Karen Johnson Watson, Jacqueline Belik,
Speaker 3: Victoria Blake, bring us Home, Jill.
Speaker 2: Shaw and Athena Ginchard and Sean Price and Kate Donado. Hey, hey, listen,
Speaker 2: the holidays are coming, and you probably want to get
Speaker 2: some gifts for people. And there's nothing more fun than
Speaker 2: a gift that's personalized, like a private joke or a
Speaker 2: name or something. And and Basic Becky can make you
Speaker 2: anything you want, T shirt, bounce pad, mug, go to her,
Speaker 2: go to just basic Becky dot com and order all
Speaker 2: the stuff. Yes, yes, that's what you want to do
Speaker 2: with Basic Becky. She's not basic, but that's just the
Speaker 2: name of it. And then our friend Randy may Ames,
Speaker 2: I was thinking for you, for us, maybe like best
Speaker 2: friends animal like that.
Speaker 3: Randy uses her shout for whatever charity we can. She's
Speaker 3: chosen some and we've chosen some and an honor of people.
Speaker 2: I think you could make a gift to us or
Speaker 2: like a senior dog dog place and make it in
Speaker 2: the honor of penelopees. Yes, yes, yes, yes, please, all right, Okay,
Speaker 2: thanks everybody. We'll be back with you tomorrow for your Patreon.
Speaker 2: And I was going to say, we love you.
Speaker 3: We think you were sorry, but we do love you,
Speaker 3: we do thank you, but I have nothing to be sorry.
Speaker 3: I mean, like no, well the jokes about Poland, but
Speaker 3: that's my family.
Speaker 2: But I want to tell you guys also something and
Speaker 2: that is that on our rose Pricks feed, which some
Speaker 2: of you are not there yet due to the fact
Speaker 2: that I see a lot of number of people listening
Speaker 2: to Board, a f still on the board feed, which
Speaker 2: we'll keep throwing up there so you have it. But
Speaker 2: if you go to rose Pricks, we do a lot
Speaker 2: of our Hollywood Cringe is really like what Board Patreon is,
Speaker 2: and so we do that sometimes for free. Well it
Speaker 2: is Hollywood Cringe is free free. Last week we did
Speaker 2: a whole extra episode about the Olivia, Newsy stuff.
Speaker 3: Yeah, the the RFK junior, all that we went so
Speaker 3: deep dive kind of amazing.
Speaker 2: Us being funny. It's very bored afesque, and half the
Speaker 2: time will stop and be like this is so bored
Speaker 2: right now. Yes, sometimes we'll stop or somebody be like,
Speaker 2: save it. I did for you, guys, right, Okay, Okay,
Speaker 2: you're welcome. Goodbye guys. Bye, Hey,