Speaker 1: Coming up on this week's Chewing the Cud, I've got
Speaker 1: a story about why men like their hands in places.
Speaker 2: I'm bringing news about a nineties pinoff and then makeover.
Speaker 3: Well, then let's get going, shall we?
Speaker 1: Welcome to Chewing the Cud with me, River Scott and
Speaker 1: my good friend the delightful Mike, Benny and Rowe. Hello, Mike,
Speaker 1: how you doing?
Speaker 2: Delightful?
Speaker 1: Your groove? I do deeply dig.
Speaker 2: We're bringing you all the show business you could possibly need,
Speaker 2: as well as some fun news stories.
Speaker 1: Great things. Then okay, let's get going. What you got
Speaker 1: for us first, Mike? Yes?
Speaker 2: So, how do you feel about celebrities? Glows ups?
Speaker 1: Could not care less?
Speaker 2: Okay, that's some characteristic of you, is it? That was
Speaker 2: called sarcasm? Do you remember the nineties? Of course you do.
Speaker 1: No, I'm very young.
Speaker 2: You're older than me.
Speaker 1: There's another reason I don't remember the nineties. Nothing we
Speaker 1: can talk about before the watershed.
Speaker 2: So do you remember bay Watch?
Speaker 1: Yes? Yes? Actually yes, yeah, lots of slow motion running
Speaker 1: and things jiggling in like and Jason Momoa. This was
Speaker 1: his first acting gig. Yes, yes, his first, his first gig,
Speaker 1: and and it was delightful seeing him in such tiny,
Speaker 1: tiny shorts.
Speaker 2: Almost as good as seeing him as Target Atlantis.
Speaker 1: I did love him as random Dex with the with
Speaker 1: the with the dreadlocks and the yea, the deep voice. Anyway,
Speaker 1: Pamela Anderson, they both had cracking jobbles. Yes, yes they did.
Speaker 2: So she's appeared makeup free, okay, so sounds makeup?
Speaker 1: Is this? Has she never done that before?
Speaker 2: Well, she started to do it more, okay, including Paris
Speaker 2: Fashion Week and the met Girl and the Oscars. So
Speaker 2: that's when people are typically made up. There, they've done
Speaker 2: the slap, they.
Speaker 1: Do that, they do their Yes, they beat their face
Speaker 1: as it were.
Speaker 2: Yes, there she is from the note Christy face.
Speaker 1: And that's actually a real human person, is it? Under
Speaker 1: all that human person?
Speaker 2: The only thing that's not real at that point in
Speaker 2: the picture is all of the filler in the face
Speaker 2: and the boobs and.
Speaker 1: The hair and the lips her hair? Is that actually
Speaker 1: her hair? Yeah?
Speaker 2: All right, not well cared for, but it's there. So
Speaker 2: that's what she was about an inch of makeup, okay,
Speaker 2: exactly right. But what she doing she started to show
Speaker 2: herself without makeup, okay, And there's a very good reason
Speaker 2: for this. So this is her now without makeup. Okay, Okay,
Speaker 2: it's she's made a choice after the death of her
Speaker 2: longtime makeup artist, Alexis Vogel. Okay, and it's she says
Speaker 2: she's changing how she views beauty, aging in public identity.
Speaker 2: She wants to move away from the whole image that
Speaker 2: she was in the nineties of the pin up and
Speaker 2: every like everyone watching her and pin up posters on
Speaker 2: the wall and stuff, flumpies, the flumpies. So she went
Speaker 2: make up free after the death of her makeup artist
Speaker 2: as a tribute, right, And then she said, actually, this
Speaker 2: is really liberating to not have to worry about putting
Speaker 2: the makeup on and looking a certain way. I'm aging,
Speaker 2: you know, I'm in my late fifties. Now I accept
Speaker 2: you know, life's moving on. And so she's just embracing
Speaker 2: her natural beauty, right, which I thought was quite love
Speaker 2: love this story.
Speaker 1: And it's it's nice because that's almost like the opposite
Speaker 1: way around to how the me ja would would tell
Speaker 1: us we should be behaving like, yes, enjoy your youth
Speaker 1: while you're beautiful, and then as you get older, you've
Speaker 1: got to hide all the imperfections and the yellocks boswellocks
Speaker 1: to you too, Yeah, boswellocks for the whole thing. Really yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so that's nice. Well, good for her. I mean she
Speaker 1: looks she looks fine. Yeah, like she looks more human
Speaker 1: than she did in the previous one.
Speaker 2: She's still very pretty, yeah right, and she's definitely looking
Speaker 2: her age in a positive way. Yeah, Like she looks
Speaker 2: she looks like she's a mature woman, which is you know,
Speaker 2: and she's still sexy.
Speaker 1: Yeah. And one has to wonder how much time she
Speaker 1: saves now probably compared to like how long she had
Speaker 1: to spend.
Speaker 2: Like artists, is doing your makeup? It's not just slapping
Speaker 2: on some foundations. It's not five minutes in a way, no,
Speaker 2: it's not doing it.
Speaker 1: I mean you're going to pad your invoice exactly, even
Speaker 1: if even if it's not entirely necessary, you're gonna have
Speaker 1: an extra twenty minutes of what do they use now?
Speaker 1: Is it like salmon sperm or something that that people
Speaker 1: have started putting on their face? Yste met younger, what.
Speaker 2: Have you gettul to? Right, I'm moving on. How do
Speaker 2: you feel about Tom Hardy?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yes, oh yes, oh yes, yes a friend of Tom Hardy?
Speaker 1: Are I yes? Yes, yes, yes, yes.
Speaker 2: Similar age to you as well.
Speaker 1: No, yes, yes, yes, that seems unlikely.
Speaker 2: It's actually forty seven. So here he is the handsome
Speaker 2: devil that he is. He's a new drama Mobland, right.
Speaker 2: He's actually revealed that he's got ongoing health issues. He's
Speaker 2: had two knee knee surgeries, a hernitated disc sayattica, and
Speaker 2: what he calls General Wear and Tear.
Speaker 1: Which is the name of that charges by the hour
Speaker 1: from down near me. I think, yeah, General Wear and Tear.
Speaker 1: You have to get them so will promote the show.
Speaker 1: He's described pushing through despite feeling unwell.
Speaker 2: He's been drinking alcohol free beer, so he's not actually
Speaker 2: drinking alcohol right, to try and help ease his syn dreams.
Speaker 1: Literally anything that isn't beer if you don't want to
Speaker 1: drink alcohol.
Speaker 2: When he's like having social times with his friends is
Speaker 2: skipping alcohol beer and just having narcolic beer and stuff.
Speaker 2: He's discussed the chronic pain injuries, yeah, saying it's intense
Speaker 2: even way he's acting.
Speaker 1: Is this from the show that he's doing now or
Speaker 1: are these over the course of his career they've kind
Speaker 1: of like stacked And.
Speaker 2: He's saying that, you know, my age is catching up
Speaker 2: with me now and I'm not as lie as I
Speaker 2: used to be. I mean, still a very attractive young
Speaker 2: man young.
Speaker 1: So so he's complaining that in the course of making
Speaker 1: all these million dollar films and being incredibly famous and exciting,
Speaker 1: things have started to ache and creak as he hits
Speaker 1: and most fifty and is it embracing it? Right?
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's saying, you know, when we're looking at the
Speaker 2: idea of toughness, right, all of these toughness things have
Speaker 2: a toll to play and that sort of.
Speaker 1: Thing, resilience and a terrible tie.
Speaker 2: Oh you can take it off, no mind. Yeah, So
Speaker 2: have you found things starting to ache and as you wake.
Speaker 1: Up in the morning. No, No, everything's still in perfect
Speaker 1: working order, thanks the death.
Speaker 2: Talking of people that you're similar ages to Pope Leo
Speaker 2: this fourteenth.
Speaker 1: He's fourteen, No, the fourteenth. Right. You know what I
Speaker 1: said at the beginning, that you were that we were friends,
Speaker 1: and that you're a delight. Yeah, I might re record that,
Speaker 1: taking all that back. Yeah.
Speaker 2: So, formerly Robert Francis Provost or Prevost obviously in the
Speaker 2: First American Pope. Okay, he has been recently featured on
Speaker 2: Finding Your Roots which is which is very there is,
Speaker 2: which is the American version of who do you Think
Speaker 2: You are? Which is the whole family tree.
Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, he has found that he has relations to Donna, Okay,
Speaker 1: Justin Bieber, Angelie, the Jolie, and Hillary Clinton, right, very
Speaker 1: well connected. Yeah, so the the Illuminati or that all
Speaker 1: that back room Schnannigan's of the powerful and.
Speaker 2: Just Bieber Illuminati.
Speaker 1: That'd be great if miss Higher, Justin Bieber and Madonna
Speaker 1: are part of the illuminatie in the world secretly, you know,
Speaker 1: I can see her, Donna being Mumra Yeah, Mamra living. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she's part of the illuminati, but just because she founded
Speaker 1: it back in like the fifteenth century or whatever it was, yeah,
Speaker 1: fourth century.
Speaker 2: On a retirement party. So yeah, I don't think. But
Speaker 2: Justin Bieber's part of the illuminited because no, it's through
Speaker 2: a shared French Canadian ancestry, okay, also include heritage of Creole,
Speaker 2: Haitian and African American roots as wellsh According to the
Speaker 2: producer of the show, he was visibly moved to learn
Speaker 2: about his multicultural ancestry.
Speaker 1: Well you would be, wouldn't you. If there's a camera
Speaker 1: pointing at you. You've got to make it worthwhile, got
Speaker 1: to have some emotions going on. I can't just be like,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, cool, that's nice. It's got to be like no, really, gosh,
Speaker 1: oh golly. Foundly my granddad had known, he'd have said
Speaker 1: some very rude words.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So what do you think that here Madonna related
Speaker 2: to the pope? Do you think she'd do a living
Speaker 2: like a prayer?
Speaker 1: Now? I was, yeah, I mean her whole thing was like,
Speaker 1: got some religious overtones to it, hasn't it? With that
Speaker 1: whole Madonna thing, Madge, Madge, good old Madge. What was
Speaker 1: it she called herself when she was pretending to be
Speaker 1: an English Landon gentry person. She wanted to go by
Speaker 1: a different name, with something like Forlicity or something stupid
Speaker 1: like that. She wanted to she wanted to get called
Speaker 1: someone else, And I went calm down, all right, Yeah
Speaker 1: that was that was ay Richie days, back when they
Speaker 1: had a country estate in the.
Speaker 2: Home in London. Sure she does well when she misses
Speaker 2: the money, yeah, just in biebrand the Pope. So if
Speaker 2: we did an ancestry thing on you, what do you think
Speaker 2: would come up with?
Speaker 1: Oh? Well, I know there's been a lot I'm from
Speaker 1: a hardy northern mining stock Doncaster. All right, you won't
Speaker 1: think it to look at me, but this is how
Speaker 1: the old talk where I'm from. Yeah, ten generations of
Speaker 1: miners and miners families and then before that farmers. But
Speaker 1: they're all from around the same kind of fifty mile radius,
Speaker 1: which has some rather itchy connotations if you think about it. Webbing,
Speaker 1: the wedding, the webbing, the webbing. But yeah, apparently a
Speaker 1: little bit of inbreeding's fine because what about you, Mike.
Speaker 1: My family are very proud of you.
Speaker 2: I'm sure German and Welsh ancestry so lots of flenny languages,
Speaker 2: and we have a family in Germany in the nineteen
Speaker 2: forties that wore a lot of brown and black. So
Speaker 2: we're not going much further into that, right.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's good.
Speaker 2: That's that's that's the update from me.
Speaker 1: Thanks for that, Mike.
Speaker 2: So what you bring us after the break river, Well,
Speaker 2: I'm going.
Speaker 1: To be talking about the reason men like having their
Speaker 1: hands there, so don't go anywhere.
Speaker 2: Welcome back to chewing the cud Now River. You've been
Speaker 2: talking about hands, yes, indeed, okay that's fingers, but yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: like a demented from it.
Speaker 1: Do you know why men put their hands down your trousers?
Speaker 2: It feels lovely? It does, don't It's warm. It's not
Speaker 2: a little bit of salvinegar.
Speaker 1: Salt and vinegar. Mine's more of a freshly baked bread
Speaker 1: kind of scent. Yeasty, it's nice. It's where I keep
Speaker 1: the easty anyway. A common stereotype, often portrayed in sitcoms
Speaker 1: and observed casually. I do like casually observing is when
Speaker 1: men stick their hands down in the front of the
Speaker 1: pants while they're watching TV or relaxing or whatever. Sometimes
Speaker 1: it's considered a gross habit, but well, considering some of
Speaker 1: the other things men get up to, this is one
Speaker 1: of the isn't that bad. It's very widespread, though it's
Speaker 1: not just like a thing. It seems to be everybody.
Speaker 1: Study suggests that it can be linked to comfort or warmth,
Speaker 1: or subconscious instincts tied to protecting sensitive areas, which makes
Speaker 1: sense because evolution only works on those that breed, so
Speaker 1: if you're covering your junk so it doesn't get bitten off,
Speaker 1: you're more likely to have children.
Speaker 2: Or if you're watching TV and so comes with plaque.
Speaker 1: Others may argue they always do. Someone's always got someone anyway.
Speaker 1: Others may argue that it's a gendered behavior, judged more
Speaker 1: harshly when women do it than when men do it.
Speaker 1: But I say, stick your hand down anyone's pants? Who
Speaker 1: really cares with consent? Sure? But yeah apparently yeah? Would you?
Speaker 1: Is it something you do? Are you often having a
Speaker 1: good rummage down there? Not?
Speaker 2: Often? So. In my formative years, I worked in a
Speaker 2: local shop that had a pick and mix, and boys
Speaker 2: used to Boys used to come in with their hands
Speaker 2: down the drums of the trousers and then not use
Speaker 2: the scoop for the pick and mix, but go out
Speaker 2: and get handfuls of sweets for the pick and mix.
Speaker 1: And did you ever go and have a good sniff
Speaker 1: of the sweet? They can't?
Speaker 2: No, no, because they didn't look clean. But yeah, sorry,
Speaker 2: it's just my hands tend to rest on my thighs
Speaker 2: when I'm relaxing.
Speaker 1: Or someone's thighs.
Speaker 2: Anyway, Okay, I have someone.
Speaker 1: But then what about you? Yeah, I'm always sticking my
Speaker 1: hands down pants. Yeah, it's the best way to be good.
Speaker 1: Check it's still there, you know.
Speaker 2: Very just in case it ran away.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's very sensitive equipment. It needs a lot of adjusting.
Speaker 2: Uh Okay, I know somebody that I work with that
Speaker 2: stands up and dances in an effort not to look
Speaker 2: like the jiggling the.
Speaker 1: Drunk that just draws more attention.
Speaker 2: That's what I said. But going, well, I get that point, but.
Speaker 1: To each the rown. But then I suppose if we
Speaker 1: think about posture and where our hands are with men
Speaker 1: versus women as it were, Yeah, you don't. If you
Speaker 1: see a woman sat slumped on the sofa with her
Speaker 1: and in her pants, then it's going to be very
Speaker 1: evocative of a It's going to be telling you a
Speaker 1: lot about that person in that moment, that they're a slob,
Speaker 1: that they're not lady like, that they're okay, do you
Speaker 1: know what I mean? That's usually what that what the shorthand?
Speaker 1: This isn't. This is me saying that you see it on.
Speaker 2: This is very different river that's happening here now.
Speaker 1: When you see it on TV and in the med
Speaker 1: jar if you see a woman slumped on the sofa
Speaker 1: with a hand of the pants, it's meant to be
Speaker 1: shorthand for letting you know that she's yeah, that she's
Speaker 1: not a classy girl, she's not lady like, she's not dainty,
Speaker 1: she's low key or unrefined or missing the the company
Speaker 1: of a man as it were. I mean, who would
Speaker 1: miss the company of a man anyway?
Speaker 2: Uh?
Speaker 1: Key quotes, it's not creepy, it's comfortable. That quote is
Speaker 1: not That quote is not attributed to anyone. It's just
Speaker 1: there in my mind.
Speaker 2: So they're not mutually exclusive actions.
Speaker 1: No comfortable and creepy. But hey, should we crash on
Speaker 1: all right? Do you remember in the first night of September,
Speaker 1: back in the mists of long long ago, a shop
Speaker 1: called W H.
Speaker 2: Smith I love Smith's.
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Is it a train station?
Speaker 1: So yeah, apparently, yeah, they're they're relaunching part of their
Speaker 1: business using the name TG Jones w H. Smith's. There
Speaker 1: we go such a difference. I mean, having all that
Speaker 1: price drop in the window is like, it does make
Speaker 1: it seem like it's already on its way out of business.
Speaker 2: But okay, they've just labeled it TG Jones as a
Speaker 2: w H. Smith's.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they've even gone for a double initial and then
Speaker 1: a surname. They've gone from Smith to Jones and two
Speaker 1: very different it's it's it's hardly a big rebro letters apparently.
Speaker 1: TG Jones was a family owned stationer and bookseller that
Speaker 1: operated throughout the twentieth century in the UK and was
Speaker 1: eventually acquired and absorbed into W. H. Smith's. All right,
Speaker 1: so they've they've a company they Yeah, they've absorbed it.
Speaker 1: They've driven a company into the ground and then absorbed it. Yeah.
Speaker 1: They they stole all their customers, used all the money
Speaker 1: to buy the company. They may not kill it. They
Speaker 1: may now they've re animated the corpse for some kind
Speaker 1: of pr exercise.
Speaker 2: May not have been a hostile takeover, but it may
Speaker 2: have just been a look, we're going to buy your business.
Speaker 1: Is that all right?
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's the money painting them as malicious.
Speaker 1: The name are you? Are you? Are you on their
Speaker 1: payroll getting something out of this? The name evokes a
Speaker 1: sense of nostalgia, apparently, and it's being used in a
Speaker 1: new format focused on local goods, relaxed seating, and traditional values.
Speaker 1: So you can't go in there if you're trans or queer.
Speaker 1: Everyone will be wearing flat caps and women will only
Speaker 1: be able to buy certain products normal way smiths. This
Speaker 1: movie is aimed at reviving footfall to Britain struggling high
Speaker 1: streets where online shopping and rising rents have caused closures.
Speaker 2: How how was rising.
Speaker 1: Rents and online chap No? No, how is this gonna
Speaker 1: make people want to come back in.
Speaker 2: Because it's nostalgic and people will people will buy specifically
Speaker 2: for this.
Speaker 1: But it's not nostalgic for wh Smith because it's called
Speaker 1: tg Jones. I'd never heard tg Jones No.
Speaker 2: But I think it's because TG Jones was part of
Speaker 2: a small part of the country, right.
Speaker 1: But they're rolling it out UK wide, So there's no
Speaker 1: nostalgia for people who weren't in that small part of
Speaker 1: the country.
Speaker 2: But for those people in that's what there's going to
Speaker 2: be a nostalgic thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but.
Speaker 2: Eh, as long as I can still get maybe nineteen
Speaker 2: pounds sandwich at an airport, who cares?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, god forbid, I don't. I don't spend
Speaker 1: over the odds on a notepad or a calendar that's
Speaker 1: already three months out of date, or god knows what else.
Speaker 1: We want to bring people. We want to bring back
Speaker 1: what people loved about the high Street, says W. H.
Speaker 2: Smith, throwing up outside of Wetherspoons into a bin buskers
Speaker 2: it still exists.
Speaker 1: Well, there's emo kids on their skateboards with their skinny
Speaker 1: jeans and their floppy hair. That's what I loved about
Speaker 1: high streets. Yes, very niche. Do you think this is
Speaker 1: a sustainable move or a PR gimmick?
Speaker 2: A PR gimmick?
Speaker 1: Yeah, me too, right. British Drug Mules in Bali? Okay? Yeah,
Speaker 1: which that's that's scary. Yeah, sounds like a spin off
Speaker 1: of another TV show, Like British Drug Mules was the
Speaker 1: original and now they've got a spinoff on the beat
Speaker 1: somewhere in Bali. Two British nationals were arrested in Indonesia
Speaker 1: after being sound with being found with where you would
Speaker 1: be sound with eight kilograms of cocaine on your christ
Speaker 1: on them? Well, oh dear.
Speaker 2: Free standards.
Speaker 1: They claimed they thought the substance was angel Delight, a
Speaker 1: powdered dessert. I'm aware of it, yeah, and denied knowing
Speaker 1: it was illegal drugs. Indonesia enforces some of the toughest
Speaker 1: drug lawers in the world, including the death penalty. Although
Speaker 1: they original did face execution, the pair sentence was reduced
Speaker 1: to a life imprisonment. So is it the two guys?
Speaker 1: Is it the guy in the middle and the lady
Speaker 1: on the end, who definitely isn't on you from EA standards,
Speaker 1: got a trump? It she's got a trump? Or is
Speaker 1: it the poor white house looking guy in the background.
Speaker 2: The two gents, so the one with the fit, petching
Speaker 2: facial tattoos.
Speaker 1: Okay, but then why why are three of them wearing
Speaker 1: the same outfit because they're waiting to match? All right?
Speaker 1: Fair enough? Can you imagine cocaine angel Delight made from
Speaker 1: cocaine and mixing some milk and pop it in the
Speaker 1: fridge and wait for it to set.
Speaker 2: Oh five minutes later, you've got to treat keep you
Speaker 2: wait for hours?
Speaker 1: You see.
Speaker 2: I can go through a whole sashay of Instant Sorry
Speaker 2: angels alike?
Speaker 1: Is that the non brand version, the version.
Speaker 2: Iceland? Yeah, I'm instant pack of Instant. It goes through
Speaker 2: one of them on my own in one sitting serves forward.
Speaker 1: Would you would you even bother like mixing it into
Speaker 1: the dessert or you just get a spoon and or
Speaker 1: a credit card and just deal with it as a powder, because.
Speaker 2: You're supposed to make a pint of milk, right right,
Speaker 2: So what you do is you wait till you're halfway
Speaker 2: through a two pint of milk. I see put the
Speaker 2: power in shake. Shake, shake, shake, shake into a mouth.
Speaker 2: You're thinking, that's a great idea, like because it's a
Speaker 2: milkshake that gets thicker as you leave it. So it's
Speaker 2: not like a milkshake like you're drinking it and it
Speaker 2: goes it gets thicker. So it's a milkshake that gets thicker.
Speaker 1: Anyway, that's all we have for the show this week.
Speaker 1: Thank you for watching, and we will see you all soon.
Speaker 3: So