Speaker 1: You're watching Chewing the Cud.
Speaker 2: We've missed Kinsman and Mike Ben in Rome.
Speaker 3: Do you remember when William Shatner World course it.
Speaker 2: No, I'm not as old as you, rude.
Speaker 3: It is very ruly. Hello, welcome to Chewing the Cards.
Speaker 3: You're always horrible to me. You are not always horrible.
Speaker 2: Absolutely are horrible if you think about like last year, right,
Speaker 2: I was nice to here for about thirty seconds.
Speaker 3: I suffer. I genuinely I suffer. What have we got
Speaker 3: for us this week, Mike?
Speaker 2: If you don't enjoy it, well, this week I've got
Speaker 2: a story that I can relate to. And then we
Speaker 2: get all scientific in that science that is ooh, and.
Speaker 3: We even have a game to play, in our game
Speaker 3: of the week. But on screen now you can see
Speaker 3: our social media contact infoe just look for at the
Speaker 3: Cud TV.
Speaker 2: And as the names of people who have dropped us
Speaker 2: a lang all on the bottom of the screen. We
Speaker 2: ignore the fact that we've got a dog licking a vagina,
Speaker 2: and we go over to mister the show business.
Speaker 3: Is it ready for the show biz?
Speaker 2: What if I said no? What if I with draw consent,
Speaker 2: Well we wouldn't have much of a show, Okay, I
Speaker 2: suppose I have to say, yes.
Speaker 3: Well, I've got some very interesting things.
Speaker 2: Okay, So.
Speaker 3: Billie eilishh we've spoken about her before. She was a
Speaker 3: little bit coy about being asked about sexuality.
Speaker 2: And it wasn't a surprise to me when when she
Speaker 2: answered the question.
Speaker 3: Well, no, she did kind of make that point, didn't
Speaker 3: She was like, didn't you know? And it's nobody's business
Speaker 3: but her own, un as she wants it to be.
Speaker 3: And she's been quite vocal about that since, saying that
Speaker 3: she felt very annoyed that people were interested about that
Speaker 3: and how they were interested about that, and the pressures
Speaker 3: about it all. However, now it is out there, she's quite.
Speaker 2: Vocal, she's opened somewhat, she's bloomed as whole bloom artist.
Speaker 3: Well, it's all out there now. Yes, we've spoken another
Speaker 3: week about her new song that's from her third album,
Speaker 3: which she's not gonna The interesting thing for me, she's
Speaker 3: not going to release any singles from this album, just
Speaker 3: releasing the album, so that is going to be out
Speaker 3: there there.
Speaker 2: She is looking at it very chirpy.
Speaker 3: Well, she's getting quite gothy but sophisticated in billy stylish.
Speaker 2: Wednesday Adams.
Speaker 3: Yes, absolutely, well as sylish as she looks now. The
Speaker 3: way she's talking about things to confirm that she is
Speaker 3: Lisbion is, well, I can't say it.
Speaker 2: What's she saying?
Speaker 3: There? You go, why can't you see it? Because it's
Speaker 3: very explicit, and I'm a gentleman. I don't use such language.
Speaker 3: You're not pointed out what I'm supposed to be reading,
Speaker 3: because this.
Speaker 2: Just like facts.
Speaker 3: Well, her new song Lunch is very explicit in its language,
Speaker 3: and she said that she wrote it before even doing
Speaker 3: anything with a girl and then wrote the rest after. Okay,
Speaker 3: she's been in love with girls her whole life, but
Speaker 3: she just didn't understand until last year that she just
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry, wanted her face and a vagina.
Speaker 2: Okay, NaN's not watching. It's okay, by none might be watching.
Speaker 3: She's dead. They're both they're both long long dead. But yeah,
Speaker 3: it's she's she's not pulling any punches, is she. She's
Speaker 3: just laying it all out there.
Speaker 2: She's not laying it all out there. No, No, she's
Speaker 2: a bit like this, Doug.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's I think that Pug might be called Billy. Yeah,
Speaker 3: it's it's really going to town.
Speaker 2: Isn't it after the lips at the minute, so's Billy.
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry, but yeah, it's we We don't go
Speaker 3: for her explicit language on this show.
Speaker 2: This show is ninety.
Speaker 3: Yeah basically anyway. The third album will be released on
Speaker 3: the seventeenth of May.
Speaker 2: Okay, cool, not long to wait at all?
Speaker 3: That Nope, not as long at all. Moving on to
Speaker 3: other news. We haven't got long to wait for Eurovision yeay.
Speaker 2: So I think that Eurovision is very much like a
Speaker 2: first date. You build up to all this excitement, you
Speaker 2: get ready, you have a couple of drinks, and then
Speaker 2: it comes within thirty seconds and you're massively disappointed.
Speaker 3: What a misery. I love it. It's great.
Speaker 2: It's great until the very end, when you're watching us
Speaker 2: slowly droop.
Speaker 3: Well, that is like a first date for you, isn't it. Yeah?
Speaker 3: I love it. I am difficult working in my world.
Speaker 3: I'm usually very hammered.
Speaker 2: Why the writing erections wherever I go.
Speaker 3: I love Eurovision all that. I love the Eurovision. The
Speaker 3: only problem is I tend to get absolutely hammered by
Speaker 3: the time of scoring happens. So that whole thing about
Speaker 3: feeling disappointed about how well England I've accepted that the
Speaker 3: UK is always going to do awful, so I'm not a.
Speaker 2: Part from the town. We didn't win but still managed
Speaker 2: to host it.
Speaker 3: Well, yes, but we we did all right. Came second then,
Speaker 3: but I think that's because of the politics as well.
Speaker 2: I always believe that the person that comes seconds is
Speaker 2: the winner.
Speaker 3: Again, we're not talking about your sex life.
Speaker 2: I was referring to a date.
Speaker 3: Hmm. Anyway, the news about eurovisions, we're rapidly coming up
Speaker 3: to it happening. The odds if you are you a
Speaker 3: betting person, not really well, I mean I put money
Speaker 3: on the lottery m that's might still the wallow in it.
Speaker 3: That's more of a raffle than really like betting on
Speaker 3: the outcome or something, because you think you might have
Speaker 3: an insight on which horse is doing well and healthy. Anyway, anyway,
Speaker 3: the reason the what do you call them bookies? They
Speaker 3: are improving the odds on all the gay entrance or
Speaker 3: the LGBT entrance in apart from Russia. They're not all gay,
Speaker 3: they're very all gay friendly. But no, these particular entrants,
Speaker 3: our own Olio Alexander as well. It's not Bim and e. No,
Speaker 3: this I've heard the track for this one. It's going
Speaker 3: to be the anti anti Brexiteers anthem Europapa. It's have heard, yeah,
Speaker 3: it's if you ever get the chance to Its definitely
Speaker 3: the Camp Stupid entry of this year, apart from another
Speaker 3: one called rint In from Croatia, which is also kind
Speaker 3: of a banging, rave anthem, but very stupid lyrics. The
Speaker 3: lyrics are daft, stupid lyric Well. The video for Europapa
Speaker 3: and that, if it's in any indication about what's going
Speaker 3: to happen with the live performance, that's going to be
Speaker 3: the big Camp hit. It's just freaking daft. Oliex Alexander.
Speaker 2: I have loved Oli Alexander for years and years.
Speaker 3: Well, he's a bit of a dish. And if you've
Speaker 3: heard the song Dizzy, it's it's not bad. It's a
Speaker 3: bit of a banger, it's all right. The odds for them, though,
Speaker 3: are not looking good. He's only twelve favorite to win,
Speaker 3: so twelve. Let's go on to a different topic before
Speaker 3: this is completely derailed by my co host here, so
Speaker 3: a little a little fashion for you. The Olympics twenty
Speaker 3: twenty four in Paris are coming up and they have
Speaker 3: released the British uniform. Oh now, I'll not bother you
Speaker 3: with all the different looks and stuff like this. It'll
Speaker 3: be it'll be white. And there's been a lot of
Speaker 3: fuss recently about fashion houses releasing the Union Jack flag
Speaker 3: in a stylistic way because apparently that's not patriotic and
Speaker 3: might be a little bit too woke. That was from
Speaker 3: Kiss Starmer, who could jog on?
Speaker 2: He's having to try and plead towards the right.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but just to give you a taste, shall we
Speaker 3: have a look at Tom Daily?
Speaker 2: Is this just a way of looking at a twink
Speaker 2: in a swimming costume?
Speaker 3: Absolutely it is. Can we have a look at the twink? Please?
Speaker 3: There we go.
Speaker 2: Oh what I never like about Tom Daily in the
Speaker 2: swimming trunks is they always smooth his area in posts?
Speaker 3: Well they have to. Well why, I will tell you
Speaker 3: for why.
Speaker 2: At the Olympics it's there, you can see it. Hello.
Speaker 3: They they have to wear them two sizes smaller than
Speaker 3: they should do, and and Tom Daily does handily tell
Speaker 3: us about this. We've always been working on the fit
Speaker 3: and the material to make sure they're as comfy as possible.
Speaker 3: I don't think that's true when they're that tight so
Speaker 3: that we can perform at our best. For diving, you
Speaker 3: want to make sure that everything's in place and that
Speaker 3: you don't need anything going awry, especially when you're spinning around.
Speaker 3: You hit the water at thirty five miles per hour,
Speaker 3: so you don't need anything in weird places. Basically, you
Speaker 3: don't want to chop your cock off when you're diving
Speaker 3: into the water.
Speaker 2: Dropping from bathtub of razor blades.
Speaker 3: Chopping the cockoff is what if it got you know,
Speaker 3: slipped out the side, slipped side in them. But that's
Speaker 3: the point. You've got a were room tight.
Speaker 2: What I'm saying is the fact that they are that tight.
Speaker 2: When you're watching the Olympics right as I do all
Speaker 2: the time, you can see a definite imprint of people.
Speaker 3: That's because he's hanging around the pool with the similarly
Speaker 3: beautiful boarder here.
Speaker 2: It's too smooth. They smooth it too. They actually smooth
Speaker 2: it in pictures because it's otherwise it's it's porn. I
Speaker 2: can't wait to watch the wrestling.
Speaker 3: Again, the singlets anyway, that's everything from the show is nice.
Speaker 2: And for those people are watching Olympics, I would recommend
Speaker 2: watching Georgia in the Olympics.
Speaker 3: Anyway, stick around because next it's Mike in the Buzz.
Speaker 3: You're watching Chewing the Card with Mist and Mike. Now
Speaker 3: let's go into the disgusting parts of the Internet. As
Speaker 3: it's Mike with the Buzz my search history, he said,
Speaker 3: the discuss sting bits of the Internet. Wow, I look
Speaker 3: at nothing but porn. What you're looking for is porn.
Speaker 3: I don't I google nice wholesome things. Wholesome, wholesome, wholesome
Speaker 3: one that might be a yeah on trains.
Speaker 2: Do you believe in ghosts?
Speaker 3: Yes? I do?
Speaker 2: Oh good, this is handy. When have you Have you
Speaker 2: ever heard a ghost? No, I haven't seen a ghost.
Speaker 3: I think so, but not for definitely. You think you
Speaker 3: saw a ghost? Yeah, but not in a way that
Speaker 3: I can go. Oh, ghosts are definitely real. I believe
Speaker 3: that there must be something, but I can't. I can't
Speaker 3: put It'd be wrong of me to say his evidence,
Speaker 3: because nobody can really do that.
Speaker 2: Well. One man thought he could. Oh right, as he
Speaker 2: thought he could. Hear voices and sometimes people sing and
Speaker 2: talking coming from his electric fan, so he would have
Speaker 2: his electric When it was warm, he'd pop his fan
Speaker 2: on to cool him. To waft him a bit of
Speaker 2: wafting wafted, and he could hear people talking and sometimes shouting,
Speaker 2: sometimes music, sometimes singing. It's weird.
Speaker 3: It was the window not just open and distorting NELT
Speaker 3: sounds from outside.
Speaker 2: Nope, it was actually the fact it was a quite
Speaker 2: cheap fan and not very well insulated. And the way
Speaker 2: that we're going to bit that sciense radio waves right
Speaker 2: were being transmitted by the by the fan because the
Speaker 2: coil inside was picking up a frequency of a radio
Speaker 2: station and when it was on, it wasn't actually it
Speaker 2: wasn't the blades making the noise. It was actually the
Speaker 2: motor in the back picking up the radio waves. So
Speaker 2: he thought he was growing slightly but raving mad. But
Speaker 2: it was actually the fan. Okay, it can happen with
Speaker 2: any electronic device if the electronics aren't very well insulated.
Speaker 2: So we don't make that much in this country because
Speaker 2: the regulations we've got, or within Europe because of the
Speaker 2: same regulations.
Speaker 3: Because it breaks, it.
Speaker 2: Happen and then but like in other parts of the
Speaker 2: world where the regulations aren't that strong, they can actually
Speaker 2: do this quite often.
Speaker 3: Wow.
Speaker 2: So yeah, if you're ever in a far f long country,
Speaker 2: and you can hear somebody talking, maybe singing. Turn off
Speaker 2: your electrics. M don't turn off the electrics if there's
Speaker 2: a gas leak.
Speaker 3: Yeah, now I think. I think when it comes to
Speaker 3: haunted things making noises, if they are electrical or or
Speaker 3: functional in some way, then that's less believable that it's
Speaker 3: actually a spirit moving on. How do you deal with
Speaker 3: creepy crawlies? It depends. Sometimes I freak out. Sometimes I'm
Speaker 3: perfectly fine, like a spider move out savior that can
Speaker 3: be very humane. Sometimes I'm depends. There's no rhyme or
Speaker 3: reason to it.
Speaker 2: Okay, so we don't know how you're interact with a spider.
Speaker 2: If they're big and horrible and airy, you'll try and
Speaker 2: date them. I don't have a spider in there. Well,
Speaker 2: if you're not a fan of a Racketd's right. There's
Speaker 2: places that you shouldn't go on holiday because they've released
Speaker 2: a map places where you can find the underwater Cannibal Spider.
Speaker 3: That's a horrible title. There is, Oh no, that would
Speaker 3: scare the hell out of me.
Speaker 2: We wouldn't say it. It's underwater, right, so it hangs
Speaker 2: upside down underwater, right, and then we'll eat anything that moves.
Speaker 3: That's upside down.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's the top of the water there, right, So
Speaker 2: if you look carefully, it's actually a bubble of air.
Speaker 2: Then reason it doesn't drown, right, But it's actually upside down,
Speaker 2: So that's the top. It hangs at the bottom.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like it's crawlinal ceiling and it's the surface
Speaker 3: of the water exactly.
Speaker 2: And then something comes along and it goes I'll have amble.
Speaker 3: And nibbles. Well that's ingenious but horrifying. Yes, that is
Speaker 3: a spider I would be scared of.
Speaker 2: Okay, So would you like to know when not to
Speaker 2: go on holiday to see this?
Speaker 3: Yes? Can I avoid it? Please? Okay?
Speaker 2: France, Germany, Switzerland, Slovenia, Europe. It's not a far flng
Speaker 2: tropical because you think it's going to be a far from.
Speaker 3: Well yeah, whenever I think about big scary spiders are
Speaker 3: usually thinking about Australia exactly freaking huge Europe. How big
Speaker 3: is this bad boy? How big is this bad boy?
Speaker 3: That one? It's about that big. That's not a life
Speaker 3: stivee twitch, that's.
Speaker 2: A lifesize picture of the spader.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think size has something to do. Yeah, people
Speaker 3: say matters, especially when it comes to big, horrible airy things.
Speaker 2: So they're not yet in the UK by and I
Speaker 2: use the word yet because they could come.
Speaker 3: Is it a bit like the fire ants in Australia.
Speaker 3: They're not supposed to be there, but they've got there
Speaker 3: and now they're there, they're they're there. This global warming
Speaker 3: thing needs to be stopped warming.
Speaker 2: This is this is migration.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but isn't a lot of migration because of like
Speaker 3: a lot.
Speaker 2: Of Japanese not weed. It was brought over originally as
Speaker 2: a plant. Oh that's pretty. Now it's a pest and
Speaker 2: you get it in your guard.
Speaker 3: The same with the ruddy squirrels, the ruddy squirrels, the
Speaker 3: gray squirrels, the gray squirrels.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all squirrels, not all squirrels. But I don't like
Speaker 2: the look of the red ones. They're two tofty. And
Speaker 2: if if you don't like things that are tofty, why
Speaker 2: not share that with us? They could TV on social media. Nuts.
Speaker 2: I love people seeing them my nuts. That brings us
Speaker 2: nicely to our story of the week.
Speaker 3: Now, now he needs to stick to the script.
Speaker 2: I was part way through saying something. Right now I'm
Speaker 2: gonna have to ask you to just try and imagine
Speaker 2: this problem. Okay, Right, So there has been an interview
Speaker 2: on this Morning, because that's still TV show apparently with
Speaker 2: a gentleman about his life problems.
Speaker 3: Right, That's something they do on the show.
Speaker 2: Because people are assuming that his life is great, right
Speaker 2: and everything's brilliant.
Speaker 3: Not a former presenter at all, it's okay.
Speaker 2: But I think everything's going wonderful and that sort of thing.
Speaker 2: And he's opened up about some of the unseen expectations
Speaker 2: and realizations of having this particular problem. Now I completely
Speaker 2: empathize with him on this and sympathize with him. Okay,
Speaker 2: as the man with the UK's world's biggest penis has
Speaker 2: told people how much of a horror it is to
Speaker 2: have the world's biggest penis. Yeah, he's saying that he
Speaker 2: has to he has to bring it up. He has
Speaker 2: to mention it because if when you're dating someone, if
Speaker 2: you just take make it into the bedroom as it were,
Speaker 2: and they then see it, most people are shopped and scared. Right,
Speaker 2: So you have to mention it at some point that
Speaker 2: I have a massive penus.
Speaker 3: Right, Is this the actual gentleman? Or can I see this?
Speaker 2: Man?
Speaker 3: I want to see that.
Speaker 2: I don't need like so, so for his protection, I've
Speaker 2: purposely not put a picture up or will I mention
Speaker 2: his name because someone has Google and tendencies? Right, bit
Speaker 2: stork ray, you're thinking about that?
Speaker 3: Absolutely got on Instagram?
Speaker 2: Why because he finds the female form of nuring. But
Speaker 2: he says, you can't like mention it like within the
Speaker 2: first ten minutes because that sounds pervy.
Speaker 3: I love, I've got yeah exactly.
Speaker 2: So it's like the problems coming in because of it's
Speaker 2: not classic. And then he says, when you do actually
Speaker 2: get to it as well, penetry of sex is very difficult.
Speaker 2: It's not as enjoyable because the person has to be
Speaker 2: very relaxed, right, I'm not everybody's interfisting, right. The part
Speaker 2: has to be relaxed and they have to be prepared
Speaker 2: for it, and it can be more of a journey.
Speaker 3: Whack on some men. You bring out the gun oil.
Speaker 2: We all know he just used the spit use the loop,
Speaker 2: playing a triangle down?
Speaker 3: There? Can we go to break? I might need a minute, got.
Speaker 2: A minute, you might need a minute? Thirty seconds? Actually
Speaker 2: rolling a cigarette? It's not wrong there?
Speaker 3: How big actually is it?
Speaker 2: It's thirteen and a half inches.
Speaker 3: But but length is one thing.
Speaker 2: What they didn't talk about the girth that we're talking
Speaker 2: about the length because it wasn't a let's see if
Speaker 2: it will wake your appetite show.
Speaker 3: It was this is the situation, like you don't put
Speaker 3: a man with a huge on daytime TV for it
Speaker 3: not to be titulating a housewives sat there doing their
Speaker 3: knitting and drinking their cups of tea or stay at
Speaker 3: home husband's all go or missed Kinsman, I'm busy at work,
Speaker 3: our professional I've got a job today.
Speaker 2: Did you know you can watch this morning on replay?
Speaker 3: No? Can you?
Speaker 2: I've got a job.
Speaker 3: I've got a job. Well, they don't usually have anything
Speaker 3: on there that i'd be into. You know who stands
Speaker 3: these magazine shows where it's just a few people chatting
Speaker 3: away and interviewing random people and talking about rubbish. What's
Speaker 3: the show like that?
Speaker 2: Nobody? But that's all from the buzz this week.
Speaker 3: Stick around as coming up, we have a game to
Speaker 3: play in our game of the week, Welcome back, and
Speaker 3: yes you are watching Chewing the Cut and we're going
Speaker 3: to play Who's a Kazoo? And this one is for
Speaker 3: the man who has found something interesting under his bed,
Speaker 3: has he it's Mike offfee pop.
Speaker 2: Not my bed, not my bed, day of the week.
Speaker 3: Who's bed have you been looking on? Better? Not be mine? Anyway,
Speaker 3: I believe you have a kazoo ready at hand.
Speaker 2: I do, but I'm going to tell you this story
Speaker 2: first because it's brilliant. So, as you are aware, I
Speaker 2: am recently bereft m So I've not spoken to my
Speaker 2: father in twenty one years.
Speaker 3: Yes, we're not particularly sad about his passing.
Speaker 2: Are well, Well, we're sad about the passing. We're just
Speaker 2: not going to miss him that much. It was very homophobic,
Speaker 2: called me the F word. Yeah, made a screen call.
Speaker 3: No, we all have difficult relationships with Yes.
Speaker 2: But unfortunately I've had to clean out his flat. I
Speaker 2: was under his bed. Oh no, what did you find? A?
Speaker 2: And and what I'm going to call a very impressive
Speaker 2: personal aid.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 2: So, ladies and gentlemen, you hear it here first bottom
Speaker 2: in his genetic So are you ready for the first
Speaker 2: one missed?
Speaker 3: After all that he gave you, I've heard some stories,
Speaker 3: ladies and gentlemen, and this was not a nice person.
Speaker 3: And ah.
Speaker 2: Wow mm hmmm. Yes, I've also found a couple of
Speaker 2: VHS's and I'm not sure whether I want to watch them.
Speaker 2: So the first song, are you ready?
Speaker 3: That's that's that's not me? For sake? That has I'm
Speaker 3: not so could you?
Speaker 2: I couldn't imagine I was there, missed. Have to imagine
Speaker 2: I lived it going on?
Speaker 3: What's this?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 3: Oh oh oh?
Speaker 2: Silicon lube as well? So he knew what he was doing,
Speaker 2: right the first one?
Speaker 3: Maybe maybe that was his way of trying to understand
Speaker 3: you better, just like bottle was actually empty, he was
Speaker 3: just trying to little experiment you mentioned you.
Speaker 2: Mentioned already today, right, first song? Mm hmmm, I can't
Speaker 2: give you a midche of you do?
Speaker 4: I'm sorry again?
Speaker 3: Sorry, yeah, please try that song again because I'm rather
Speaker 3: distracted now. H No, ladies and gentlemen, this man is
Speaker 3: recently bereathed.
Speaker 2: I am recently bereathed.
Speaker 3: I genuinely don't have a clue about that one.
Speaker 2: There's atomic kit in hole again? Why is that funny?
Speaker 2: Best thought that was a good rendition? Hold again?
Speaker 3: Uh, excuse me, I'm feeling a bit chesty.
Speaker 2: Don't know what happened there, But okay, next.
Speaker 4: One, could you do that again?
Speaker 3: Because I didn't quite get it? And do it with
Speaker 3: the dance routine this time. That's the wrong dance routine.
Speaker 3: You said a dance routine. I said the dance routine.
Speaker 3: And you know, damn well, ideas if you like you,
Speaker 3: you should have put a ring on it, be on tie.
Speaker 2: Yes, exactly correct.
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, I'm I'm o FA with the Great American
Speaker 3: Gay Song Book. Okay, that's that's that's good handy for
Speaker 3: this game. Really.
Speaker 5: M m hmmmm mm hmmm mm hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm mm hmmm mm
Speaker 5: hmmmm m m mm hmmm.
Speaker 3: I'm liking the little old shoulders shimmy that you're doing.
Speaker 3: It's a bit of a shoulders going on there. I
Speaker 3: nearly got that midnight. Oh god, I've got the lyrics
Speaker 3: coming in my head.
Speaker 2: But the lyrics, say the lyrics.
Speaker 3: Can you do it again? Please, just a little, a little.
Speaker 5: M hm mm hmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to yourself. No, I'm not getting it. I
Speaker 3: vaguely recognize it. You're doing a good job. It's it's
Speaker 3: my memory that's failing me. Okay.
Speaker 2: It's Pony Pony, Pony Pony Pony by by genuine.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, I was thinking of an entirely different song
Speaker 3: than that was a terrible performance in an awful job.
Speaker 2: Pony.
Speaker 3: No, that's that's entirely the wrong one.
Speaker 2: What what so do you think I was doing?
Speaker 3: It wasn't genuine's pony that song I know very well
Speaker 3: from watching Magic Mike far too many times.
Speaker 2: Yeah, who has to leave the cinema? Okay, the next
Speaker 2: one I have.
Speaker 3: Gone to a cinema. We already give long mac.
Speaker 5: M h m hmmm.
Speaker 3: You sound like a bee furiously wanking.
Speaker 2: Okay, never heard of bee feurish? Well, they only make
Speaker 2: that noise when they're flying. So what you're saying there
Speaker 2: is that the bees like start stop flying then they
Speaker 2: go because the wings are beating.
Speaker 3: And they've got other limbs still available to them. I'm
Speaker 3: sure they can have an im flight wang if they want.
Speaker 2: Did you know every time a bee rest its wings
Speaker 2: and picks them all the hairs got slightly hooks, and
Speaker 2: so every time they land or they take off, they
Speaker 2: rip a little bit of their wing and that's what
Speaker 2: actually kills them. Over the time, the wings been torn
Speaker 2: to shreds.
Speaker 3: What a horrible fact.
Speaker 2: I didn't say. It was a lovely, very morbid I'm
Speaker 2: recently bereft, it was.
Speaker 3: It was.
Speaker 2: I would have thought you'd got this one. It's untouched
Speaker 2: by the Veronicas.
Speaker 3: I have never I'm gonna have to google that one.
Speaker 2: It's good, just good tune. It's very very mid two
Speaker 2: thousands kind of in a like LaRue kind of era.
Speaker 3: Any song after the millennium music died after the millennium.
Speaker 2: Beyonce, that was after the millennium, Okay, this one was
Speaker 2: before the millennium then, mm hmmm.
Speaker 3: Natalie and Broodly Tom it is. Yeah, that's that's good.
Speaker 2: Music's actually a cover song as well.
Speaker 3: It is a cover song. Yeah.
Speaker 2: I was singing the original because of fancy.
Speaker 3: Okay, it did like a little little bit of that.
Speaker 3: That is a good song, okay, mm hmmm.
Speaker 5: H m.
Speaker 3: I don't know. I'm not doing very well this week.
Speaker 2: I think face l G B t Q I a
Speaker 2: plus alternative slash ally listen who was named after a color?
Speaker 3: Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: Think of a song of singers who were named after
Speaker 2: a color? What color of the lips behind you?
Speaker 3: Purple?
Speaker 2: No, that's the lighting.
Speaker 3: I am color blind.
Speaker 2: I think spiky blonde hair, arial artist pink Yes, name
Speaker 2: a pink song?
Speaker 3: U cover me in sunshine. That's quite pretty. I like
Speaker 3: that song just like a pill, just like a pill
Speaker 3: that that was your just like a pill that was meant,
Speaker 3: just like a pill. Sometimes I think me not doing
Speaker 3: very well in this show isn't down to me.
Speaker 2: Always nice to be wrong. I suppose they missed. I'm done.
Speaker 2: I'm underappreciated in my lifetime, and I'm recently berecked.
Speaker 3: I've appreciated art.
Speaker 2: Art's a bit strong.
Speaker 3: Well, stick around as next, it's Mike in that science
Speaker 3: that is Welcome back to cheering the card and now
Speaker 3: we're going to be educated beyond recognition as it's Mike
Speaker 3: in that science.
Speaker 1: That is that science that is.
Speaker 2: Me. You know, when you're going to the meal deal
Speaker 2: selection on your lunch, what choices do you make?
Speaker 3: I go for what I want at the time. That's
Speaker 3: probably not good for me, like what like like lots
Speaker 3: of sandwiches and carbs and eggs and meats.
Speaker 2: Eggs. Now there's what I was hoping for, Okay, because
Speaker 2: you ever noticed how they're always perfectly peeled, hard boiled eggs. Yes,
Speaker 2: you ever wondered how they do that? No answer again,
Speaker 2: you ever wondered how they do that?
Speaker 3: It's baffled me for years. Correct, it's been a source
Speaker 3: of intense dilemma that I do not know the answer
Speaker 3: to this, all.
Speaker 2: Right, back of it, all right, So we're going to
Speaker 2: do it today on a small individual scale. But we're
Speaker 2: going to basically peel an egg without using our hands
Speaker 2: on the egg.
Speaker 3: Oh, okay, I usually have to. I do eat a
Speaker 3: lot of of boiled eggs. I know, smash a lot
Speaker 3: of shells up. I know, usually a lot of boiled eggs.
Speaker 3: We can tell from the smell. Protein farts are the
Speaker 3: sign of a good exercise regimen.
Speaker 2: It's the aura of egg you have around you all
Speaker 2: times that I was preferred to anyway. So the first
Speaker 2: thing we would choose is a jar. Okay, have a
Speaker 2: lovely mason jar. No, the reason why we use a
Speaker 2: mason jar is because it has a seal.
Speaker 3: Yes, I like a mason jar.
Speaker 2: I like it. I like a seal almost as much
Speaker 2: as I like a sea lad. So you're going to
Speaker 2: take your water and you're going to fill the mason
Speaker 2: job about halfway halfway about halfway.
Speaker 3: Why do you always do that science that is with
Speaker 3: liquids where you're nowhere near electrics and I.
Speaker 2: Am because if you want to come and do that science.
Speaker 2: That is, You're more than welcome to come over and
Speaker 2: do that science.
Speaker 3: That is. Well, we both know that I'm not the
Speaker 3: intelligent one of the pair. Even I can admit that. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I'm just acknowledging the fact you're trying to kill me.
Speaker 3: Oh god ya.
Speaker 2: Okay, so about halfway.
Speaker 3: I'm not so stupid that I can't recognize the murder.
Speaker 2: It's not murder if you accidentally die, not my okay.
Speaker 2: So that is, believe it or not, highly abrasive water water.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 2: What you now need to do. You need to get
Speaker 2: your egg. Okay, I've got my dad here because they're
Speaker 2: in a little green box. Okay, and then ever so gently,
Speaker 2: ever gently op it in.
Speaker 3: You've done that with your run before, haven't you? And
Speaker 3: so have you.
Speaker 2: Stuck? There we go, That's what he says to all
Speaker 2: the boys. Right now, what we're going to do is
Speaker 2: we're going to seal up the masoner, making sure that
Speaker 2: it's on very tight, because we don't want to drippy drippy.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 2: Now, this is going to choose centrifugal force.
Speaker 3: Do you mean swishing about a bit?
Speaker 2: Swishing about a lot? And all we're going to do
Speaker 2: is literally swill okay, and then we're going to swirl
Speaker 2: this way, and this is what the big machines do.
Speaker 3: It's like a washing machine.
Speaker 2: Like a washing machine, okay, and as it spins around,
Speaker 2: the egg is going to peel itself.
Speaker 3: Oh wow, actually this is the best size ever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I was going to start.
Speaker 3: I mean, it's kind a bit.
Speaker 2: You didn't hard boil your egg, you monster.
Speaker 3: That properly came apart. Then I was getting all excited
Speaker 3: then and now I've just got a frothy You've.
Speaker 2: Got very very thin mayonnaise is what you've got there. Oh,
Speaker 2: try to get with a different egg.
Speaker 3: Then it's you've got.
Speaker 2: A bowl to you empty your jar into your bowl.
Speaker 3: I feel like I've been made a fall of I
Speaker 3: should do that. It's all a little bit now. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I so excited. I was already getting quite excited.
Speaker 2: I noticed.
Speaker 3: I thought I found a solution to all my boiled
Speaker 3: egg needs.
Speaker 6: Your boiled egg needs. You planned this monster, almost like
Speaker 6: a planning.
Speaker 3: You know, you're right, almost ruddy did You're not the
Speaker 3: evil mastermind you think you are.
Speaker 2: You know, same thing I do every night, try and
Speaker 2: take over the world.
Speaker 3: Hang on, if you're the brain. Does that make me pinky? Hmm?
Speaker 3: What are we doing tonight, Brian? Same thing we do
Speaker 3: every night, Pinky. We're trying to take over the world.
Speaker 2: World.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I think we've just found the baseline
Speaker 3: of our double act here. Now.
Speaker 2: The problem is, this is a lot of energy for
Speaker 2: my little arms. I would have peeled this myself by now.
Speaker 3: Yes, but I do find and I do peel a
Speaker 3: lot of bags. It does take a long time. It
Speaker 3: will not take it. It's just getting every bit of
Speaker 3: it off.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but this is how they do it in industries.
Speaker 2: They have big, big barrels that just rush them around
Speaker 2: and there's no there's no grating or anything because I've
Speaker 2: just damaged the eggs.
Speaker 3: See, it's not working as well now.
Speaker 2: As it's sad boiled there. I were to agitate a
Speaker 2: different way now just because I can. What are you
Speaker 2: doing to that poor egg?
Speaker 3: This is this is the most sex life I've had
Speaker 3: an agent. M Oh yeah, baby baby, m h If
Speaker 3: you just cut if you just cut out everything from
Speaker 3: the shoulders down, there's people who pay money for this
Speaker 3: on only fans, not a lot yeah.
Speaker 2: Hm. Well, and then what you start to see is
Speaker 2: it'll just at one point it'll just come off in
Speaker 2: a big clumpy bit. So I think man's actually done.
Speaker 3: So it's not as exciting now, is that I've got
Speaker 3: a perfectly central Google force using long words to pretend
Speaker 3: he's clever. I want this egg now, I might as
Speaker 3: well have just cracked it.
Speaker 2: They cracked the first one.
Speaker 3: Oh well, I'm giving up. I'm having the egg.
Speaker 1: That's science.
Speaker 3: That is did you cook this egg all the way through?
Speaker 3: It's a bit spongy?
Speaker 2: Did I cook the egg all the way through?
Speaker 3: I boiled the egg? Well?
Speaker 2: Yeah, the twenty five minutes, twenty five minutes, twenty five
Speaker 2: minutes still rough like this. What happened was I put
Speaker 2: it in the pan? Did you start the off cold?
Speaker 2: Put me in a pan of cold water, then turn
Speaker 2: the heat on and just leave it right. The thing
Speaker 2: is I then went, oh, I need a pooh, So
Speaker 2: I went for a pool.
Speaker 3: Have you washed your hands as well?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 2: Because what I do is after I is out, I
Speaker 2: have a shower. So that's my morning routine. Pool, then shower.
Speaker 3: The right I'm finding more about you than I needed
Speaker 3: to know.
Speaker 2: I don't pull in the shower saying and so then
Speaker 2: I came down. I went the negs. So they've been
Speaker 2: boiling for like a good twenty five minutes. But it
Speaker 2: will be cooked all the way through.
Speaker 3: It just it just.
Speaker 2: It's it's an overcooked boiled egg.
Speaker 3: This is an overcooked boiled egg. I don't think this was.
Speaker 2: I do not.
Speaker 3: I do not think this was successful. That's a quite
Speaker 3: a difficult word, you know. Successful for you. Yeah, I
Speaker 3: think it's successful.
Speaker 2: You just bite into it.
Speaker 3: Usually I put a little little salt and pepper on garnish.
Speaker 2: That's almost the end of the ship seasoning. That's all.
Speaker 2: Was the end of the show for now. Remember Jos
Speaker 2: on social media at the cood TV in all the
Speaker 2: usual places, including egg fans.
Speaker 3: Thank you for watching. We're very soon.
Speaker 2: Bye, Mom, keep the bigger things in the most than that. Before,
Speaker 2: I wanted to take you to swallow. You have not
Speaker 2: heard that before, have you? I usually goggle probably Other
Speaker 2: than that, though, build a minute