Speaker 1: Helping leaders motivate their people to a higher level of
Speaker 1: performance through strong human relations, team building, and golajving. This
Speaker 1: is the seven Minute Leadership Podcast with your host Paul Fellavledo.
Speaker 2: Hello everyone, and welcome to the seven Minute Leadership Podcast.
Speaker 2: It's episode six fourteen. There's an old saying in leadership
Speaker 2: listen twice, speak once. Most people hear that and nod
Speaker 2: their head. Then they walk into a meeting and do
Speaker 2: the exact opposite. They interrupt, They finish sentences, they preload
Speaker 2: their response while someone else is still talking. They talk
Speaker 2: to be heard, not to understand. Let me tell you
Speaker 2: a quick story. Years ago, I was sitting in a
Speaker 2: room with a leader everyone respected, and during the meeting,
Speaker 2: people kept talking over each other opinions where flying ego
Speaker 2: was bouncing all around the room. This leader stayed quiet,
Speaker 2: and when the room finally slowed down, someone asked, what
Speaker 2: do you think? He paused, took a breath, and then
Speaker 2: said something that landed like a hammer, clear, calm and direct.
Speaker 2: It reframed the entire conversation in about twenty seconds, and
Speaker 2: that moment stuck with me. Not because he spoke brilliantly,
Speaker 2: because he waited Listening twice and speaking once is not
Speaker 2: about being passive. It's about discipline, it's about restraint. It's
Speaker 2: about understanding that leadership presence is not measured by airtime,
Speaker 2: and most leaders struggle with this for one reason. Silence
Speaker 2: feels uncomfortable. Silence feels like weakness. Silence feels like you're
Speaker 2: losing control of the room. The reality is the opposite.
Speaker 2: Silence is where control lives. When you talk less, people
Speaker 2: lean in. When you listen, more, people reveal more. When
Speaker 2: you slow down your response, your words carry weight. And
Speaker 2: here's the trap many leaders fall into. They confuse speed
Speaker 2: with competence. They think fast answers make them look sharp.
Speaker 2: They think immediate responses show confidence. What they often show
Speaker 2: instead is impatience or insecurity. Listening twice means you are
Speaker 2: gathering information on two levels. First, you were listening to
Speaker 2: the words, facts, concerns, requests, opinions. Second, you are listening
Speaker 2: to what is underneath tone, emotion, hesitation, what someone is
Speaker 2: not saying. That second layer is where leadership lives. I've
Speaker 2: watched leaders miss this repeatedly. An employee says everything's fine,
Speaker 2: The leader hears the words and just moves on. A
Speaker 2: leader who listens twice. Here's the pause, the flat tone,
Speaker 2: the lack of eye contact. They know everything is not fine.
Speaker 2: Speaking once means your response is intentional, not reactive, not defensive,
Speaker 2: not performative. It means when you speak, you're adding clarity,
Speaker 2: not noise. So let's make this actionable. First, stop interrupting,
Speaker 2: even when you think you know where someone is going.
Speaker 2: Especially then, interrupting is a signal that you value your
Speaker 2: voice more than their input. Over time, people stop bringing
Speaker 2: you real information. Second, count to three before responding. Literally,
Speaker 2: let the other person fin let the silence breathe. That
Speaker 2: pause does two things. It shows respect, and it gives
Speaker 2: your brain time to process instead of react. Third, repeat
Speaker 2: back what you heard before you respond, not to sound polished,
Speaker 2: but to confirm understanding what I'm hearing is. This prevents
Speaker 2: misfires and shows you're actually listening, not just waiting to talk. Fourth,
Speaker 2: ask one more question than you think you need. Good
Speaker 2: leaders answer questions, great leaders ask better ones. One well
Speaker 2: placed question often does more than a long explanation. And
Speaker 2: here is the hard truth for leaders who struggle with this.
Speaker 2: If you're always the loudest voice in the room, you're
Speaker 2: probably the least informed. Your team knows things that you
Speaker 2: don't see. Problems before dashboards, do they feel shifts before
Speaker 2: reports catch up. Listening twice is how you access that intelligence.
Speaker 2: This is also a red key leadership moment. High consequence
Speaker 2: leadership shows up in conversations, mistcused, rush responses. Poor listening
Speaker 2: decisions create downstream problems that look like culture issues, morale problems,
Speaker 2: or even trust breakdowns. They often start with a leader
Speaker 2: who did not slow down long enough to hear what
Speaker 2: truly mattered. Think about your last difficult conversation. Did you
Speaker 2: listen to respond or did you listen to understand? Did
Speaker 2: you speak to fill space or did you speak to
Speaker 2: move things forward. Leadership is not a debate to win.
Speaker 2: It is a responsibility to carry. The leaders people trust
Speaker 2: most are not the ones who always have the answer.
Speaker 2: They're the ones who make people feel heard, understood, and
Speaker 2: taken seriously. When you listen twice and speak once, your
Speaker 2: words land harder, your decisions get better. Your team stops
Speaker 2: posturing and starts telling the truth. That is how trust
Speaker 2: is built quietly, consistently, intentionally. So as you head into
Speaker 2: your next meeting, your next one on one, or even
Speaker 2: your next hard conversation. Remember this, You do not need
Speaker 2: to dominate the room to lead it. You need to
Speaker 2: understand it. Listen more than you talk, Let your words
Speaker 2: earn their place when you finally speak. Make it count.
Speaker 2: This has been the seven minute Leadership Podcast, and I
Speaker 2: thank you for listening.
Speaker 1: For more Paul Fell of Alito Podcasts, visit paulfellowalito dot com.