Speaker 1: Justin Worship is with us, host of the Dad Podcast.
Speaker 2: We like talking parenting things.
Speaker 3: The idea of naming your kid is obviously probably step
Speaker 3: two or three of being a parent, right in terms
Speaker 3: of the responsibility.
Speaker 2: I like that sequence. I'm afraid to ask. What wanted
Speaker 2: to Number one? Is you gotta make it? There you go?
Speaker 2: Thanks Gary? Or buy it? I mean, I don't know
Speaker 2: how people get their kids the good. Yeah, that's true.
Speaker 3: But step two or three is gonna be okay, So
Speaker 3: what are we gonna call this thing?
Speaker 1: Uh And there's a lot you're setting up your kid
Speaker 1: for financial failure if if you don't pick these top
Speaker 1: five names.
Speaker 2: Yep, yeah, if you if you named your kid uh Anna, Maria, Laura,
Speaker 2: Helen or Sarah, you did good for them. They're gonna
Speaker 2: do female, Yeah, they're gonna do. They're gonna be great financially.
Speaker 2: For the guys, it's Andrew, Sam, Alex, Christopher, and Darren.
Speaker 2: Good for you.
Speaker 1: But my husband, I mean, I'm sorry, my brother. That's
Speaker 1: a weird slip. My brother's name is Andrew.
Speaker 4: Right at the time top of.
Speaker 2: The list, zoom number one, Well, guess what borrow some
Speaker 2: money from bro? He's loaded and then if you're doing poorly.
Speaker 2: Karen's taken a lot of hits in these last few years.
Speaker 2: She tops the list of struggling financially, probably because she's
Speaker 2: calling the cops on people that now deserve to be
Speaker 2: She's getting a lot of lawsuits, so's she's gonna exactly Claire, Lisa,
Speaker 2: Jennifer and Rachel, And then for guys Allie and Rob, Dan,
Speaker 2: Chris and Dominic, which is interesting because if you shorten
Speaker 2: it from Christopher, not so good financially, but if you
Speaker 2: got the full toe for going on you were, you're
Speaker 2: thriving as a guy. That's just the.
Speaker 1: Most ridiculous I've ever read that in my life. It's
Speaker 1: insane and ps. Claire is a strong, firm name.
Speaker 4: I don't think.
Speaker 1: I don't think of Claire as a financial failure. I
Speaker 1: don't see Claire as somebody who's in a gutter in
Speaker 1: financial ruin.
Speaker 4: But that's how Claire doesn't live on skid row.
Speaker 2: That's how strong Claire is. She can make you believe
Speaker 2: she's thriving when in actuality, deep down she's struggling. She
Speaker 2: needs a hug, No, she's not.
Speaker 1: Claire has a matching sweater set and a string of
Speaker 1: pearls on.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but she's financed. They're all on credit card debt. Shannon, Oh,
Speaker 2: maybe that's what I'm saying. I'm telling you Claire is
Speaker 2: not okay. If you have a friend named Claire, you
Speaker 2: need to call her and make sure she's okay and
Speaker 2: buy her lunch. She's not going to split about Claire.
Speaker 3: But they don't even there's no there's no connection, I
Speaker 3: mean right, I mean they can't establish what the connection
Speaker 3: would be between these names and film.
Speaker 2: They just basically went through and looked at social Security
Speaker 2: data and figured out who was thriving financially and what
Speaker 2: the most common names were about for those people that
Speaker 2: were thriving financially, and then technically.
Speaker 1: She should all be fired. Those people should be elon Musk.
Speaker 1: If your job is to go through social Security data
Speaker 1: and find out what your first name is successful.
Speaker 2: This is a this is a college funded study, So
Speaker 2: I don't think this is actually from the federal government.
Speaker 2: What was it. I think it was Brigham Yell.
Speaker 4: Go back to the Mormons.
Speaker 2: College closed, But they did. It's funny they did kind
Speaker 2: of what I The reason why I brought this to
Speaker 2: you guys is for just the funny of just laughing
Speaker 2: that your name has anything to do with your financial success.
Speaker 2: But I also think it's a reflection of what I
Speaker 2: feel that these anks written parents go through. That we've
Speaker 2: now added icing onto a cake, which is this is
Speaker 2: probably more of a multiple flower icing flower that's being
Speaker 2: added on top of the cake of like things you
Speaker 2: should worry about. You failed your kid because you didn't
Speaker 2: name them Anna, right, you would have just named them Anna.
Speaker 3: Listen, there's pressure in the process of naming the kid already.
Speaker 3: I think that's your point. And in terms of what
Speaker 3: we were saying, what my wife and I were saying
Speaker 3: when we were doing this exercise of what would you
Speaker 3: even begin? Would you want a family name? Would you
Speaker 3: want to name it after your grandfather? Like, what, how
Speaker 3: do you even begin? There's plenty of pressure. You got it,
Speaker 3: and you should cut down on the rules. The rules
Speaker 3: are basically for me, the rules were, I'm not going
Speaker 3: to name my son anything close to one of your
Speaker 3: ex boyfriends.
Speaker 2: That was really the only thing I didn't that is
Speaker 2: so ridiculous.
Speaker 3: That is not ridiculous because she's had so many boyfriends
Speaker 3: that the list was pretty small.
Speaker 2: See, this is why I brought this. I didn't know
Speaker 2: this was an undertended consequence. Look at how much fun
Speaker 2: we're having.
Speaker 1: It's such an early twenties thing, like I'm not what
Speaker 1: are your ex boyfriends name?
Speaker 2: The fun game I named was I played with my wife?
Speaker 2: Is that my wife had been talking about, like all
Speaker 2: the girl names, Kiara, Noel, these were all names that
Speaker 2: she was thrown around, and Kiara was my least favorite.
Speaker 2: And so when we bought our house, we adopted this
Speaker 2: kind of feral kitten that had lived in the park
Speaker 2: across the street and walk up to us, and so
Speaker 2: she was like, oh, let's keep the kitten. I was like,
Speaker 2: you know what your namebor is Kiara. That's one of
Speaker 2: the names you like. And my wife is so caught
Speaker 2: up in the emotion of her She's like, that's a
Speaker 2: great idea, and I'm like, great, we never have a
Speaker 2: daughter named Kiara now?
Speaker 3: And then an electric fence was built around the name Kiara.
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 4: That is so manipulative.
Speaker 2: I know, I know, I'm very I'm very very rarely
Speaker 2: am I good at it? That? Like?
Speaker 4: Especially my peace of who you are?
Speaker 2: I know, but it felt so strong, Oh my god,
Speaker 2: wait a minute, hold on. I've never felt more alive
Speaker 2: than that day.
Speaker 3: I don't think that's an immature thing to say, is
Speaker 3: you can't name my son after ex boyfriend.
Speaker 4: I'm not saying it's immature.
Speaker 1: I'm saying that, like in my early twenties, I was
Speaker 1: more obsessed with like like my boyfriend or now husband
Speaker 1: or whatever it was with their exes.
Speaker 2: I was more She's yeah, she's saying it was a
Speaker 2: sign of the time over your age. And you're right
Speaker 2: because because if I look, yes, because right now, if
Speaker 2: I look three years previous, I'm the only person that
Speaker 2: my wife has had sex with.
Speaker 4: I'm not even.
Speaker 1: Thinking about it in your forties or whatever, right and
Speaker 1: when I'm twenty one, yes, I may not be the
Speaker 1: only person on that list in three years.
Speaker 4: That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: That's all. I'm sorry, All right, good, you know what's
Speaker 2: funny about me? As soon as you said it, I agreed.
Speaker 2: I was just like, I'm have never thought of that.
Speaker 2: I'm so glad my naming. I dodged that bullet.
Speaker 3: And the thing is her most I think the boyfriend
Speaker 3: that she had before me was also named Andy, and
Speaker 3: if that had happened, and like we named our kid,
Speaker 3: and I know five million andy's now and they all
Speaker 3: haunt me because.
Speaker 2: They remind me of my wife's sex boyfriend. I was
Speaker 2: afraid one of them was going to be named Alvin,
Speaker 2: and so she found a loophole with Calvin or Alan
Speaker 2: or something.
Speaker 1: The best part of that is like, and I think
Speaker 1: kind of we have a magnetic quality about us, Gary,
Speaker 1: Like one of your best friend's name.
Speaker 4: Is Andy now right, Yeah?
Speaker 1: And I think also there's this weird thing that that
Speaker 1: just happens. I call you Andy sometimes. My brother's name
Speaker 1: is Andy, and.
Speaker 2: It hurts every time.
Speaker 1: And I do that sometimes. I haven't done it in
Speaker 1: a long time, But there's something to be said. When
Speaker 1: you really don't want something, sometimes the.
Speaker 2: Universe does and it hurts because you're not as financially
Speaker 2: successful ass. And the other thing is that my in laws,
Speaker 2: for the first year that my wife and I were dating,
Speaker 2: they called me in no way, absolutely no, yeah, and
Speaker 2: they wouldn't even catch on.
Speaker 3: Like I remember distinctly. We were sitting in the backseat
Speaker 3: of a car. We're going with them to I had
Speaker 3: to be dinner somewhere, and we were visiting them while
Speaker 3: they were in Seattle, and we were living in Sacramento,
Speaker 3: and and her mom my now mother in law, kind
Speaker 3: of spun around and.
Speaker 2: Was like, so, Andy, what was it like at work
Speaker 2: this week?
Speaker 3: And I mean direct eye contact and everything and no,
Speaker 3: and I was like, nobody was talking to me.
Speaker 2: Nobody on this planet is better, by the way than
Speaker 2: your Shannon. And like the comedic response take to that
Speaker 2: of just like I just imagined going stiff and just
Speaker 2: lowering her.
Speaker 3: Head at a forty and like, yeah, my wife said.
Speaker 3: My wife corrected her right away. She's like, his name
Speaker 3: is Gary, And to her credit, my mother in law
Speaker 3: now mother in law, was mortified and she said it
Speaker 3: like at dinner time, I'm really sorry for calling you
Speaker 3: that I didn't.
Speaker 2: I didn't.
Speaker 3: And my wife then again she pops up. She's like,
Speaker 3: you guys do it all the time. No we don't,
Speaker 3: and yes you do.
Speaker 4: How long were they together?
Speaker 2: Gosh, that's a great question. I don't know months.
Speaker 1: It's it's so weird. And I said, how long were
Speaker 1: Shannon and Andy together? Because my whole life it's been
Speaker 1: Shannon and Andy, Shannon and Andy.
Speaker 3: You know, we'll try living my life where I go
Speaker 3: home and they're like, who who? When I went to
Speaker 3: get notarized yesterday's signature and they're like, who's who's signing today?
Speaker 3: And I said, Gary and Shannon don't forget to download
Speaker 3: the podcast.
Speaker 4: So how long were they together?
Speaker 2: I think it was a year plus. I don't know.
Speaker 3: I honestly don't know. He just got a list. He
Speaker 3: didn't get time, praks.
Speaker 1: He just seems like it's enough time for the mother
Speaker 1: or the father to continually call the new one the old.
Speaker 2: One, and was really nice.
Speaker 4: That's what he looks similar.
Speaker 3: We have time to go into this blonde hair. He's
Speaker 3: also addicted to porn. But that's sorry. I couldn't just
Speaker 3: let that know. Yeah, you had to take a shot
Speaker 3: at him. You won, Garritt, It's okay.
Speaker 2: You won.
Speaker 3: The study that reveals that parents do have a favorite child,
Speaker 3: and to break it down, BYU and Western University looked
Speaker 3: at all of these different things. Kids who are favored
Speaker 3: tend to have better mental health, to do better in school,
Speaker 3: to have better family relationships. I'm not sure if that's
Speaker 3: the cause or the effect of being a favorite or
Speaker 3: but they also said that the older child and often girls, yes,
Speaker 3: tend to be the favorite child.
Speaker 2: Daughters predominantly are favorite. And this is what I love
Speaker 2: is bringing this in is that both of you guys
Speaker 2: have siblings that, like you have a sister, Shannon has
Speaker 2: a brother. Do you think that your sister got favorite
Speaker 2: of treatment.
Speaker 3: I think they at times did get the favorite treatment, yeah,
Speaker 3: but for different reasons. I mean, one of them was
Speaker 3: very school minded and driven and was first to graduate
Speaker 3: college because she was older. But but and then the
Speaker 3: other one was very sporty, like she was super involved
Speaker 3: in Yeah, and then I was like, hey, there's there's
Speaker 3: that guy keeps showing up at our house every day.
Speaker 2: That was the opinion on you. Yeah, Jan, do.
Speaker 1: You think that you got I think, like Gary, you're
Speaker 1: a rule follower, like before you got here. Justin we
Speaker 1: were talking about it and Gary said that his parents
Speaker 1: routinely told him that he was the favorite. And and
Speaker 1: I think that you are really good with following rules
Speaker 1: and not getting like you get into the correct amount
Speaker 1: of trouble without being a like a problem or a
Speaker 1: problem or a worry. Yeah, whereas your sisters, there was
Speaker 1: two of them. Girls are kind of tricky boys a
Speaker 1: lot of time. I think probably get the bad rap
Speaker 1: because they're little boys and they're all over the place,
Speaker 1: and they're dirty, and they're not rule followers, and they're
Speaker 1: you know, they're rambunctious, and that's just what little boys are.
Speaker 1: And I think that that's probably it. Girls are probably
Speaker 1: more self contained for the most part.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because what I've heard is that like daughters feel
Speaker 2: like they aren't that the brother always has more leeway,
Speaker 2: particularly like going out to parties and dating, because for
Speaker 2: whatever reason, parents worry less about their sons, but brothers
Speaker 2: feel like the girls get away with more because they
Speaker 2: get treated with a little bit more mittens and like
Speaker 2: and tenderly than the boy would. Right, that's like. And
Speaker 2: I think the other thing that this article kind of
Speaker 2: talks about, which I kind of agree with, is that
Speaker 2: this is really about a kid's perception. This opened my
Speaker 2: eyes because I think if you were to ask me,
Speaker 2: until recently, I would probably if I had to, like
Speaker 2: gun to my head, I had to pick a favorite kid,
Speaker 2: it would be my older son. Until recently. Now, my
Speaker 2: younger son is probably more my favorite because he's employed.
Speaker 2: I've decided that having a child two weeks. Yeah, I've
Speaker 2: decided that having a child that has a job is
Speaker 2: my new favorite thing about being a father I love it.
Speaker 1: That's the thing we were talking about too, is how
Speaker 1: it changes, like your faceite kid changes.
Speaker 2: My dad said. The way I asked him, and I
Speaker 2: know I've said this multiple times here is that I said,
Speaker 2: do you really have a favorite? And he was like,
Speaker 2: you don't have a favorite, you just always have. It
Speaker 2: rotates who you're worried about, like there's always he said,
Speaker 2: there's always one of you that your mom and I
Speaker 2: are worried about. And then when that one starts to
Speaker 2: like rally, he goes, you don't stop worrying because now
Speaker 2: you're like looking at the other two of going okay, which,
Speaker 2: what's going to happen to you two now? Because all
Speaker 2: three of you are never thriving at the same time,
Speaker 2: Like it just doesn't work out that way. Yeah, And
Speaker 2: we've used the quote before. I heard it said by
Speaker 2: Heraldo Rivera, but I.
Speaker 3: Don't know if he was the one who originated it,
Speaker 3: which is you're never as you're only as happy as
Speaker 3: your unhappiest child, and that, I mean that kind of
Speaker 3: plays into it. There you go back and forth, they
Speaker 3: go through different light and depending on how old they
Speaker 3: are too, if there's a wide age separation, they're going
Speaker 3: to go through different life stages at very different times
Speaker 3: and give you sort of the roller coaster effect of
Speaker 3: got to pay attention to this one as she's a preteen,
Speaker 3: but that guy's going to be an late adolescent, what's
Speaker 3: happening with their and vice versa.
Speaker 2: Because like like it says, the more agreeable child is
Speaker 2: also usually the more favorite, which is I think what
Speaker 2: Shannon's saying about you. I would also say that about
Speaker 2: my older son. It's just always been easier for me
Speaker 2: to talk to my older son. He's like me, he
Speaker 2: likes to talk things out. My younger son is like
Speaker 2: my wife. He holds it in if he's upset and
Speaker 2: you have to pull it out of him. But I
Speaker 2: would also argue that if you're talking about favoritism my
Speaker 2: older son, I think thinks that we favor the younger
Speaker 2: one because I have to try. I have to put
Speaker 2: in an effort to get things out of my younger son,
Speaker 2: whereas I don't have to do anything with my older
Speaker 2: son to feel like I have like that he knows
Speaker 2: that there's a connection there. I guess I don't know,
Speaker 2: but it's all perception. Nothing is real, because how do
Speaker 2: you sit down and have a sincere conversation about who
Speaker 2: do you think mom and dad love more?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 3: And when I talked about it last week, there were
Speaker 3: people who were upset that I would even entertain the
Speaker 3: thought of telling one of my children that they were
Speaker 3: my favorite, Like, what good is that?
Speaker 2: You're just going to sew division between the two of them, which.
Speaker 3: I've never tell these people shut up, Well, I would never. Also,
Speaker 3: I don't think I would ever seriously say to them, Hey,
Speaker 3: it's like sit them both down and go. You know
Speaker 3: it's been bugging me for a long time. This you
Speaker 3: I hate you, but she I like her? She or
Speaker 3: you're a moron, but he's really got his stuff together
Speaker 3: right now, listen. I'll be the first to admit that
Speaker 3: I'm not perfect or doing all this great, but I'll
Speaker 3: tell you like, we have videos of my wife telling
Speaker 3: me she was pregnant with each of our sons, and
Speaker 3: with the second one it was not a happy moment.
Speaker 3: It was definitely like we were struggling financially. And after
Speaker 3: the video, she goes, should I delete this, like basically
Speaker 3: erasing the evidence? And I said no, I said, because yes,
Speaker 3: this is kind of like a oh crap, moment, But
Speaker 3: in reality, I go, if this kid looks at this
Speaker 3: video at twenty two years of age and doesn't laugh
Speaker 3: at it because he has spent the last twenty two
Speaker 3: years of his life being loved and growing in this
Speaker 3: family and being supported, then yeah, we were hosted to
Speaker 3: begin with, and that video didn't change any of it. Like,
Speaker 3: that doesn't make any difference, I said, so, I think
Speaker 3: it is what it is. And both of my sons
Speaker 3: have listened to both all of my comedy albums, which
Speaker 3: is just me jokingly like making fun of being them
Speaker 3: and talk about how bad being a dad is and
Speaker 3: they laugh, Like I don't think it really matters. It
Speaker 3: matters when it's like when I guess it's real, Like
Speaker 3: I think if you genuinely told your kids like, oh,
Speaker 3: you're my favorite, I don't think it's really that sincere.
Speaker 2: You know what I mean exactly.
Speaker 1: That's really sweet that your kids have listened to your albums.
Speaker 2: Oh, it scared me. My dad played them when he
Speaker 2: brought him home. He played all three of them when
Speaker 2: they were like four and seven, and I'm like, Dad,
Speaker 2: did you give any context? He's like no, I just
Speaker 2: thought they get a kick out of hearing their dad
Speaker 2: do what he does, and they still to this day
Speaker 2: they like it. They think it's funny, like which I agree, Shanon.
Speaker 2: It does. It warms my heart. But your point also
Speaker 2: is they probably don't take it seriously. They don't they
Speaker 2: know how much I love them. Yeah. I cry everything
Speaker 2: they do and I hug them all the time. Again
Speaker 2: like this idea that we worry that the kids don't
Speaker 2: feel like you love them, like you start crying right now.
Speaker 2: I already am the greatest after half an hour. Thank you,
Speaker 2: Justin