WEBVTT 1 00:00:04.440 --> 00:00:05.280 You're listening to. 2 00:00:05.599 --> 00:00:08.000 Sorry for asking, Sorry for asking. 3 00:00:08.160 --> 00:00:11.599 I'm Cold Connor and I'm Adam Ramsey. This is where 4 00:00:11.599 --> 00:00:14.000 we talk, shop, ask questions. 5 00:00:13.640 --> 00:00:16.280 Tell stories, and laugh some laughs about. 6 00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.039 Being creators as well as consumers of adult content. 7 00:00:19.199 --> 00:00:20.359 You love watching too. 8 00:00:20.440 --> 00:00:24.199 We certainly do. We also discuss the impact adult films 9 00:00:24.199 --> 00:00:27.199 have had on us, on our guests, and on the 10 00:00:27.359 --> 00:00:32.880 LGBTQ community. So strap on and strap in and here 11 00:00:32.920 --> 00:00:34.000 we go. 12 00:00:41.719 --> 00:00:48.240 Hi, Hi, Hello, welcome everybody. Just sorry for asking. I'm 13 00:00:48.240 --> 00:00:51.679 Cold Connor and I'm Adam Ramsey. Hi, col what's going on? 14 00:00:51.799 --> 00:00:56.079 Oh my god, so much someday. It's a wild, wild season. 15 00:00:57.479 --> 00:01:00.520 I'm wrapping my Night of the Living. Daddy's Shirt now 16 00:01:01.039 --> 00:01:05.760 by Daddy Department from Caswell. You know Caswell DJ slash Rapper. 17 00:01:05.799 --> 00:01:08.959 Oh yeah yeah, Daddy's Apartment is his line. I love 18 00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:11.760 this shirt. I think it's so good. And this is 19 00:01:11.760 --> 00:01:14.719 a very special day. I'm very excited about today's episode. 20 00:01:15.120 --> 00:01:18.200 For those of you listening or watching, you may remember 21 00:01:18.400 --> 00:01:21.480 last episode. In the latter part of the episode, we 22 00:01:21.680 --> 00:01:25.799 mentioned a certain somebody who I was excited about knowing 23 00:01:25.840 --> 00:01:28.400 for a long time and potentially get. 24 00:01:30.120 --> 00:01:30.799 I really do. 25 00:01:31.680 --> 00:01:33.359 And we're going to get into why. 26 00:01:33.920 --> 00:01:38.519 First, let me introduce the iconic legendary Victor Belmont. 27 00:01:38.959 --> 00:01:40.280 Oh my god, Hi. 28 00:01:42.879 --> 00:01:45.280 Victor, it's so good to have you here. 29 00:01:45.480 --> 00:01:47.599 So you probably weren't listening because you have so many 30 00:01:47.599 --> 00:01:51.200 better things to do with your life. But last episode 31 00:01:50.879 --> 00:01:54.920 I sang your praises and shared a couple stories, and 32 00:01:54.959 --> 00:01:57.280 then as we were discussing some things, we both kind 33 00:01:57.280 --> 00:01:59.200 of looked at each other and we're like, you know what, 34 00:01:59.519 --> 00:02:03.040 Victor would make a great guess, And I immediately reached. 35 00:02:02.760 --> 00:02:04.959 Out and you were down and here you are, so 36 00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:05.760 thank you so much. 37 00:02:05.840 --> 00:02:08.680 Of course, welcome to the show here, Yes, that will 38 00:02:08.719 --> 00:02:09.919 be here for you anything. 39 00:02:10.080 --> 00:02:13.919 Thank you. So this is cool you guys. Of course, 40 00:02:14.039 --> 00:02:15.919 I feel like I. 41 00:02:15.840 --> 00:02:17.960 Feel like, how many times have we met where you're 42 00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:19.919 like working and dancing. 43 00:02:19.599 --> 00:02:24.159 Now, probably for like eight years, like in a in 44 00:02:24.199 --> 00:02:27.120 a real way, probably eight years. That's all I do 45 00:02:27.240 --> 00:02:27.680 is dance. 46 00:02:28.199 --> 00:02:30.080 You're a workaholic, though I am. 47 00:02:30.360 --> 00:02:33.319 If I'm not working, I can't think, you know, that 48 00:02:33.520 --> 00:02:35.560 is my thing? Thinking bad money good? 49 00:02:37.840 --> 00:02:39.240 Has that always been the case? 50 00:02:39.680 --> 00:02:43.719 You can't catch a running target right head running target, 51 00:02:43.919 --> 00:02:46.680 So and like I just feel like I don't know, 52 00:02:46.719 --> 00:02:47.560 I'm a Sagittarius. 53 00:02:47.599 --> 00:02:48.400 I'm a fire sign. 54 00:02:48.560 --> 00:02:52.080 Do you not like to like take a look in sometimes? 55 00:02:52.080 --> 00:02:56.439 Oh, I'm I'm super spiritual. I'm I actually take I 56 00:02:56.520 --> 00:02:59.879 take at least a week off every month to just 57 00:03:00.080 --> 00:03:02.120 kind of like why the fuck are you here? What 58 00:03:02.159 --> 00:03:05.120 the fuck are you doing? Like, but I take that 59 00:03:05.199 --> 00:03:09.000 week and that's my only rest. Everything else the rest 60 00:03:09.039 --> 00:03:09.680 of us is like. 61 00:03:09.639 --> 00:03:10.080 Go go go. 62 00:03:11.199 --> 00:03:13.599 Okay, so my plan, I had a plan. 63 00:03:13.680 --> 00:03:15.400 It didn't really quite work out because we are we 64 00:03:15.439 --> 00:03:17.199 are kind of on the on the over over the 65 00:03:17.319 --> 00:03:20.360 hump of the Halloween week at the time of this taping. 66 00:03:20.360 --> 00:03:22.759 Halloween is tomorrow, so it's like we're kind of in 67 00:03:22.800 --> 00:03:24.000 that in between. 68 00:03:23.879 --> 00:03:26.479 Like Halloween. I know, Halloween weekend happened. 69 00:03:26.479 --> 00:03:28.680 Now, I'm kind of focused on the stressful time that 70 00:03:28.800 --> 00:03:32.039 is election week. But I was hoping to film with 71 00:03:32.159 --> 00:03:34.199 Victory yesterday so that we could talk about that today. 72 00:03:34.199 --> 00:03:38.599 But it didn't work out, which is okay. Yeah, what happened. 73 00:03:38.879 --> 00:03:41.400 I had I had an overnight and I got home 74 00:03:41.439 --> 00:03:44.080 and like I texted him at like six thirty and 75 00:03:44.120 --> 00:03:46.159 I still had not slept, and I was like, do 76 00:03:46.240 --> 00:03:47.840 I really want to fuck this person? 77 00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:49.159 I really want. 78 00:03:48.919 --> 00:03:53.439 To fuck you know, you're filming it too. 79 00:03:53.280 --> 00:03:55.439 And like, it's so different when you go from like 80 00:03:55.560 --> 00:03:57.319 a paid I was selling you in the car. It's 81 00:03:57.360 --> 00:03:59.840 so different when you go from a paid situation where 82 00:03:59.879 --> 00:04:05.120 I am performing and like I'm completely dissociated my pussy. 83 00:04:05.240 --> 00:04:07.919 It's like shaking my hands, Like if I don't assign 84 00:04:07.919 --> 00:04:11.039 it value, it literally doesn't feel like anything to me. 85 00:04:11.639 --> 00:04:15.639 So to go from that to like wanting super pleasure 86 00:04:15.719 --> 00:04:18.040 with like somebody I actually have a crush on and 87 00:04:18.120 --> 00:04:21.480 like I actually care about, I was like, this is 88 00:04:21.560 --> 00:04:24.199 just gonna waste my time, wasting her time, And I 89 00:04:24.319 --> 00:04:25.519 waited like ten years, I can. 90 00:04:25.439 --> 00:04:26.160 Wait more week. 91 00:04:26.319 --> 00:04:27.639 Yeah, I mean that is true. 92 00:04:27.680 --> 00:04:29.879 And just to give a little bit of background, Victor 93 00:04:29.959 --> 00:04:32.079 and I met in San Francisco about ten years ago 94 00:04:32.120 --> 00:04:34.839 and when we were both living there, and this was 95 00:04:34.839 --> 00:04:37.480 when I was very early in my career in adult 96 00:04:37.519 --> 00:04:39.920 films and mister Pam who has been on the show, 97 00:04:40.199 --> 00:04:43.079 who at the time was lee director of Naked Sword Studios. 98 00:04:43.279 --> 00:04:44.879 She reached out to me and she actually kind of 99 00:04:44.879 --> 00:04:47.120 pitched this idea. She was like, hey, so, like, we 100 00:04:47.160 --> 00:04:48.839 love working with you, we love that you've been kind 101 00:04:48.839 --> 00:04:51.480 of part of the family. We have this idea. You 102 00:04:51.519 --> 00:04:54.639 remember Victor Victor Belmont and I was like, yeah, we 103 00:04:54.759 --> 00:04:57.439 just met actually, and she was like, what do you 104 00:04:57.519 --> 00:05:02.079 think of filming a scene for naked Swords with Victor? 105 00:05:02.879 --> 00:05:05.800 And I will be honest, I personally at that time 106 00:05:06.120 --> 00:05:09.199 was like not ready. I was just like not ready 107 00:05:09.240 --> 00:05:12.360 to make that plunge because I I had never had 108 00:05:12.439 --> 00:05:16.079 experience with the transman before. I was certainly fascinated by 109 00:05:16.079 --> 00:05:19.560 the idea, and I declined and like, I feel like 110 00:05:19.600 --> 00:05:21.879 it took getting to know you. It took me kind 111 00:05:21.879 --> 00:05:25.000 of coming into my own you know, you have to 112 00:05:25.040 --> 00:05:27.480 sort of evolve, you have to be open, you know 113 00:05:27.560 --> 00:05:29.720 too new experiences. We've talked about this on the show 114 00:05:29.759 --> 00:05:33.439 a lot, as somebody who recently has delved into pussy 115 00:05:33.519 --> 00:05:37.360 on his own terms, which you know we're going to 116 00:05:37.439 --> 00:05:38.079 get into two. 117 00:05:38.160 --> 00:05:39.600 Once you're there, you can't leave. 118 00:05:39.759 --> 00:05:41.240 Well, I mean, you know, it's. 119 00:05:42.959 --> 00:05:43.759 A reunion. 120 00:05:44.120 --> 00:05:46.319 It's right, that's right, that's right. 121 00:05:46.839 --> 00:05:50.439 Yeah, yeah, so second coming. 122 00:05:50.839 --> 00:05:53.360 So yeah, So I have kind of like over time 123 00:05:53.600 --> 00:05:55.519 evolved my own tastes and then you and I have 124 00:05:55.519 --> 00:05:56.920 gotten to know each other a little better over the 125 00:05:57.000 --> 00:05:58.959 last couple of years as you become part of the 126 00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:01.879 Hot Dog fold and dancing with us and. 127 00:06:01.399 --> 00:06:05.319 And yeah, my crush has developed. Yeah, and now here 128 00:06:05.360 --> 00:06:05.680 you are. 129 00:06:06.720 --> 00:06:11.319 I am pretty old school actually, so I I'm super flirty. 130 00:06:11.480 --> 00:06:14.240 I'm really really You'll know. I know I'm really flirty. 131 00:06:14.360 --> 00:06:18.720 I haven't fucked any of my coworkers, you know. 132 00:06:18.800 --> 00:06:19.800 That's icee. 133 00:06:20.160 --> 00:06:21.439 That's the thing is like, you can't. 134 00:06:21.639 --> 00:06:23.759 We can be cute, we can ki key at the function, 135 00:06:23.879 --> 00:06:26.480 we can kiss, it's cute, but like, if you want 136 00:06:26.480 --> 00:06:29.120 to legitimately get to know me, Like, I know you're acting. 137 00:06:29.360 --> 00:06:31.600 You know I'm acting. You don't fucking act like that 138 00:06:31.680 --> 00:06:34.279 all the time. You're not big bad go go daddy 139 00:06:34.279 --> 00:06:34.680 all the time. 140 00:06:34.720 --> 00:06:35.199 You're a nerd. 141 00:06:35.240 --> 00:06:37.639 I see the Pokemon shit on your backpack, you know. 142 00:06:37.839 --> 00:06:40.000 Like I want I want to I want to get 143 00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:41.600 to know and fuck that guy. 144 00:06:41.839 --> 00:06:43.199 Yeah, you know what I mean. 145 00:06:43.480 --> 00:06:46.800 And I think that because of how I perform and 146 00:06:46.959 --> 00:06:49.639 how I come off, sometimes people do get it twisted. 147 00:06:49.680 --> 00:06:51.839 So they come they come at me in a certain way, 148 00:06:51.879 --> 00:06:53.959 and I'm like, well, I'm a little bit. 149 00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:54.199 You know. 150 00:06:54.279 --> 00:06:57.839 It's like I'm patient because I want to eat what 151 00:06:57.959 --> 00:07:00.600 I want to eat. I don't want to have like snacks. 152 00:07:00.600 --> 00:07:01.519 I don't want a whole meal. 153 00:07:02.680 --> 00:07:04.439 Well, I think you made the right choice because like 154 00:07:04.720 --> 00:07:07.279 if you guys had filmed when you're tired and not 155 00:07:07.319 --> 00:07:10.240 really yeah no, absolutely you're and like it could make 156 00:07:10.279 --> 00:07:11.199 you not want to do it. 157 00:07:11.160 --> 00:07:14.720 Again, and that's not right. 158 00:07:15.160 --> 00:07:17.160 And you know, things happen as they should, and I mean, 159 00:07:17.199 --> 00:07:19.040 I just have so many questions as well. I feel 160 00:07:19.040 --> 00:07:20.360 like this is a good opportunity to just get to 161 00:07:20.360 --> 00:07:22.040 know you a little better, you know, just like what 162 00:07:22.079 --> 00:07:25.279 your journey's been like, you know, just as a person 163 00:07:25.360 --> 00:07:27.600 coming into their own transness and then as like a 164 00:07:27.639 --> 00:07:28.279 sex worker. 165 00:07:28.720 --> 00:07:29.600 I see you kind of. 166 00:07:29.519 --> 00:07:34.000 As like the foremost you know, pinnacle figure of the 167 00:07:34.399 --> 00:07:39.519 trans mail sex worker slash porn community. Tell us about 168 00:07:39.560 --> 00:07:42.399 how that's all kind of developed for you, however you 169 00:07:42.480 --> 00:07:43.480 want to tell that story. 170 00:07:44.040 --> 00:07:48.040 I think that how how i'm that is just time. 171 00:07:48.199 --> 00:07:50.959 I don't think that I'm necessarily like a better content 172 00:07:51.000 --> 00:07:53.560 creator or like a better artist than any other trans man. 173 00:07:53.800 --> 00:07:57.879 But I started posting photos of myself in two thousand 174 00:07:57.879 --> 00:08:01.759 and eight, and I started plat so in two thousand 175 00:08:01.759 --> 00:08:04.360 and eight was MySpace. 176 00:08:04.560 --> 00:08:08.399 Yeah, and then my space yeah. 177 00:08:08.399 --> 00:08:12.680 So two thousand and I was I did camming because 178 00:08:13.000 --> 00:08:16.600 as a transmit there was no place to do sex work. 179 00:08:17.120 --> 00:08:20.600 You could not sign up for a gay male website 180 00:08:21.079 --> 00:08:24.399 and perform because your ide. You could not go onto 181 00:08:24.600 --> 00:08:29.920 a women's website because you don't look like that. So 182 00:08:29.959 --> 00:08:32.759 there literally was nothing except like maybe Chatterbait and a 183 00:08:32.759 --> 00:08:37.799 couple other communities. And I started posting photos as advertising 184 00:08:38.440 --> 00:08:41.000 to get people to come to my cam show. Right, 185 00:08:41.200 --> 00:08:43.159 we all know how to We're like, And I was like, 186 00:08:43.200 --> 00:08:46.080 I'm going to create this personality and I'm going to 187 00:08:46.120 --> 00:08:48.759 perform as this personality, and I'm going to take photos 188 00:08:48.799 --> 00:08:50.799 as this personality, and I'm going to think how people 189 00:08:50.840 --> 00:08:53.840 are perceiving me, and I'm going to promote that, and 190 00:08:53.879 --> 00:08:55.200 that is how I'm going to make money. 191 00:08:55.480 --> 00:08:57.720 And that was like very early on. 192 00:08:57.639 --> 00:08:59.240 And how did you find people perceived you? 193 00:08:59.559 --> 00:09:03.600 Well, you want to become the thing that people need. 194 00:09:04.519 --> 00:09:07.759 So for me, my initial question was what do people 195 00:09:07.840 --> 00:09:11.679 need me to be? And if you look at it 196 00:09:11.759 --> 00:09:15.440 on an individual basis, I don't need ten dollars from 197 00:09:15.480 --> 00:09:19.639 five thousand people. I need five thousand dollars from ten people. Ooh, 198 00:09:19.720 --> 00:09:21.840 you know what I mean. So I've always done my 199 00:09:21.879 --> 00:09:22.639 business that way. 200 00:09:22.799 --> 00:09:24.720 So a lot of the people I talked to about 201 00:09:24.799 --> 00:09:25.600 high ticket items. 202 00:09:25.759 --> 00:09:27.440 A lot of the people I talked to on camshows, 203 00:09:27.440 --> 00:09:28.919 I wouldn't have a lot, but I'd talk to them 204 00:09:28.919 --> 00:09:31.159 every day, you know, I'd care. I'd ask them, Hey, 205 00:09:31.159 --> 00:09:33.399 what do you like what? Blah blah blah, And you 206 00:09:33.440 --> 00:09:37.000 get to know somebody and you become invaluable to them. 207 00:09:37.360 --> 00:09:41.360 That is how you create a community. That's how you 208 00:09:41.399 --> 00:09:44.679 create connections, and that's how you get better taken care of, 209 00:09:45.080 --> 00:09:47.559 you know, Like I think that it started in two 210 00:09:47.600 --> 00:09:48.159 thousand and eight. 211 00:09:48.279 --> 00:09:49.200 Then there was Tumblr. 212 00:09:49.919 --> 00:09:53.480 Tumblr was where I become super famous because I'm a photographer, 213 00:09:54.600 --> 00:09:59.480 so images and gifts and for anybody who's watching Tumblr 214 00:09:59.600 --> 00:10:06.279 was like the porn renaissance. Like sure more art came 215 00:10:06.320 --> 00:10:10.120 out of Tumbler, Like I feel erotic art. Yeah, Like 216 00:10:10.200 --> 00:10:13.279 it was just a fucking explosion. It was like everyone 217 00:10:13.440 --> 00:10:16.360 was making stuff. It was so beautiful and instead of 218 00:10:16.960 --> 00:10:19.600 trying to make art and be seen, you know on 219 00:10:19.679 --> 00:10:22.919 pornhub or whatever. No shape to porn hub, but nobody's 220 00:10:22.960 --> 00:10:27.080 looking for art on those websites. The community was looking 221 00:10:27.120 --> 00:10:29.519 for that. So you were within a community that was 222 00:10:29.559 --> 00:10:32.360 supporting your art. It was like and it was because 223 00:10:32.399 --> 00:10:35.799 of the medium of photos. That's how I became really popular, 224 00:10:36.720 --> 00:10:41.399 and it's because I had more expensive photos, because I 225 00:10:41.440 --> 00:10:45.879 had a nicer camera. And the whole reason I got 226 00:10:45.879 --> 00:10:48.240 that camera was because I just was like, if you 227 00:10:48.360 --> 00:10:51.480 want to look expensive, you're gonna have to shoot on 228 00:10:51.559 --> 00:10:55.720 something expensive. That was just like when I was nineteen twenty. 229 00:10:55.759 --> 00:10:58.799 I immediately was like, you need to get a nicer camera, 230 00:10:59.440 --> 00:11:02.200 and you need to make yourself. It's like people are like, well, 231 00:11:02.240 --> 00:11:05.559 there's no representation. We don't see trans men. It's like, okay, 232 00:11:06.039 --> 00:11:08.279 well you keep asking the people who have not put 233 00:11:08.360 --> 00:11:12.480 us on the whole time to put you on. They're 234 00:11:12.480 --> 00:11:14.279 not gonna take photos of you. They're not gonna take 235 00:11:14.360 --> 00:11:17.879 videos of you. Nobody, nobody's gonna do it. You have 236 00:11:18.000 --> 00:11:22.799 to do it. And I got so frustrated because I 237 00:11:22.840 --> 00:11:25.159 applied to munch of porn companies as a trans man. 238 00:11:25.240 --> 00:11:28.200 I had been a canboy. I had been so frustrated 239 00:11:28.679 --> 00:11:31.360 that I was just like, fuck this, I'm getting a 240 00:11:31.399 --> 00:11:33.559 nice camera. I'm gonna make myself look good. 241 00:11:34.360 --> 00:11:34.559 You know. 242 00:11:34.600 --> 00:11:36.120 I was trying to get in with so many people 243 00:11:36.120 --> 00:11:37.639 who had the equipment, and I was like, you know 244 00:11:37.679 --> 00:11:41.080 what if the only thing that's stopping me is the equipment. 245 00:11:42.039 --> 00:11:43.600 Like figure it out. 246 00:11:44.559 --> 00:11:46.240 And then that's when I blew up is I got 247 00:11:46.279 --> 00:11:51.000 the nice camera and people really responded. And I had 248 00:11:51.039 --> 00:11:56.440 just moved to San Francisco in my car, and I 249 00:11:56.480 --> 00:11:59.440 was like living in the park, as many transient trans 250 00:11:59.480 --> 00:12:01.360 people do, is so don't feel bad about that hour 251 00:12:01.399 --> 00:12:03.039 of your life because it's very short and you're going 252 00:12:03.120 --> 00:12:04.720 to get out of it. So just like put your 253 00:12:04.720 --> 00:12:06.519 head down and figure it out, right, Yeah, Like. 254 00:12:06.519 --> 00:12:07.840 Buy a nice camera, buy it. 255 00:12:07.879 --> 00:12:10.759 Buy a nice camera, go to twenty four hour fitness, 256 00:12:10.759 --> 00:12:13.440 get a gym membership, take a shower every day, make 257 00:12:13.440 --> 00:12:15.399 a two month plan, get yourself the fuck out of there, 258 00:12:15.480 --> 00:12:18.440 Like you will figure it out. I had to figure out. 259 00:12:19.240 --> 00:12:21.320 And I was living in the park and working at 260 00:12:21.320 --> 00:12:23.799 the hat shop. I was working in Gorn Brothers on 261 00:12:23.879 --> 00:12:27.159 Hate and there was this place called the Sex Exchange 262 00:12:27.639 --> 00:12:29.480 and it was right next to a gay bar and 263 00:12:29.519 --> 00:12:33.000 the sex Exchange was all used electronics and I had 264 00:12:33.159 --> 00:12:36.080 I walked past like every fucking morning coming from the park. 265 00:12:36.639 --> 00:12:39.759 I saw a Canon DSLR and it was like four 266 00:12:39.840 --> 00:12:42.240 hundred dollars and I just saw it for like two months. 267 00:12:42.919 --> 00:12:44.840 I saw it and I was like, I have to 268 00:12:44.879 --> 00:12:45.600 buy this camera. 269 00:12:45.720 --> 00:12:46.639 That's gonna be mine. 270 00:12:46.720 --> 00:12:48.039 That's going to be and I was like, my life 271 00:12:48.080 --> 00:12:49.679 is going to start when I buy this kit. I 272 00:12:49.799 --> 00:12:52.519 just remember walking past it being like I had slept 273 00:12:52.559 --> 00:12:54.480 in the park, taken the shower at twenty four hour 274 00:12:54.519 --> 00:12:57.519 fitness on Vannas, gone to work and it would be 275 00:12:57.559 --> 00:12:59.519 like I'd be walking to work. I had no money 276 00:12:59.519 --> 00:13:01.440 for food. There were some days where I went like 277 00:13:01.440 --> 00:13:04.000 two three days without eating, have to seal stuff from 278 00:13:04.039 --> 00:13:06.759 Whole Foods or the fucking I felt so bad from 279 00:13:06.759 --> 00:13:08.840 the co op down the street, but like, you know, 280 00:13:09.000 --> 00:13:10.679 like I had to figure out how to eat. I 281 00:13:10.720 --> 00:13:12.480 was in the struggle, but I was just like I 282 00:13:12.519 --> 00:13:15.480 couldn't think about anything else. I wasn't even thinking about 283 00:13:15.559 --> 00:13:17.639 being in a struggle. I just remember being at work 284 00:13:17.639 --> 00:13:19.720 all the time being like, how the fuck am I 285 00:13:19.720 --> 00:13:20.600 gonna buy this camera? 286 00:13:20.879 --> 00:13:22.720 I mean, have you always been like that? 287 00:13:22.879 --> 00:13:25.840 Like, I mean, it's everything I'm hearing you talk about 288 00:13:25.960 --> 00:13:28.440 is like, even at an early age, this blend of 289 00:13:28.519 --> 00:13:32.480 like art and commerce and eroticism as well as a 290 00:13:32.600 --> 00:13:36.120 very very unique perspective that wasn't really in the mainstream 291 00:13:36.159 --> 00:13:36.759 at that time. 292 00:13:36.879 --> 00:13:38.159 Being a trans man. 293 00:13:38.240 --> 00:13:41.879 At nineteen, you knew like every time we've spoken, you 294 00:13:41.960 --> 00:13:44.200 display this confidence of like I know what I want, 295 00:13:44.240 --> 00:13:46.039 I know I'm gonna go after it. Is that something 296 00:13:46.120 --> 00:13:48.279 you had to develop or is that like has that 297 00:13:48.399 --> 00:13:49.679 always been You're just like. 298 00:13:49.799 --> 00:13:52.360 I've and I'm I'm so lucky. I've always been that way. 299 00:13:53.039 --> 00:13:54.960 I've always been since I was a kid, I've always 300 00:13:55.000 --> 00:13:57.120 been very I take a really long time to make 301 00:13:57.120 --> 00:14:00.639 a decision. But once I had made my decision, it 302 00:14:00.759 --> 00:14:03.600 is made and move. Wow, you know, move like I 303 00:14:03.639 --> 00:14:06.039 will take years and years and years and years to decide. 304 00:14:06.080 --> 00:14:09.080 But what is that to keep yourself from making the 305 00:14:09.120 --> 00:14:10.399 wrong decision or. 306 00:14:10.519 --> 00:14:14.759 Just do you like I think some people have the 307 00:14:14.799 --> 00:14:20.240 ability to I'm a channel. It is not me, like 308 00:14:20.240 --> 00:14:23.799 like my power is not me. I'm just a really 309 00:14:23.799 --> 00:14:26.879 good receptor for it. And I feel like I get 310 00:14:26.879 --> 00:14:31.399 these inspirations that like strike me, like the camera, Like 311 00:14:31.559 --> 00:14:33.799 I didn't have a fucking place to live. Why was 312 00:14:33.840 --> 00:14:36.320 I thinking I wasn't eating? Why was I thinking about 313 00:14:36.320 --> 00:14:39.240 buying a fucking camera. That's so irrational, that is so 314 00:14:39.679 --> 00:14:40.720 not you. 315 00:14:40.679 --> 00:14:41.559 Should not do that. 316 00:14:42.200 --> 00:14:44.039 But it was like this channel told me, if you 317 00:14:44.080 --> 00:14:46.039 don't get this camera and you don't do this thing, 318 00:14:46.519 --> 00:14:48.080 you've got to figure it out, You're like you have 319 00:14:48.279 --> 00:14:49.639 you would just have to think about that. 320 00:14:50.039 --> 00:14:53.120 Yeah, but the getting the camera was a means to 321 00:14:53.639 --> 00:14:55.519 not having to worry about the things that you were 322 00:14:55.840 --> 00:14:57.000 I'm worried about at the time. 323 00:14:57.039 --> 00:15:01.120 I'm still worried about those I'm gonna hear. 324 00:15:01.039 --> 00:15:03.000 We're always going to be worried about those things. 325 00:15:03.200 --> 00:15:07.519 Porn has never paid for my life. Okay, Ever, transmen 326 00:15:07.720 --> 00:15:11.919 do not get money. Let's change that. If this makes 327 00:15:11.919 --> 00:15:15.559 you feel upset, change it. You know, if you think 328 00:15:15.559 --> 00:15:17.480 I'm wrong, prove me otherwise. 329 00:15:17.799 --> 00:15:18.480 Yeah. 330 00:15:18.759 --> 00:15:21.840 So then let's go back around that time that like, 331 00:15:22.240 --> 00:15:23.759 were you working with Naked Stored a lot? 332 00:15:23.759 --> 00:15:25.399 Were you surprised to be working for them? 333 00:15:25.480 --> 00:15:25.679 With that? 334 00:15:26.559 --> 00:15:28.919 I've maybe had like two or three studio shoots in 335 00:15:28.960 --> 00:15:29.639 my whole career. 336 00:15:29.840 --> 00:15:31.960 Okay, I'm not booked. 337 00:15:31.960 --> 00:15:34.960 Right, So that's why you're creating your own and you 338 00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:35.639 always have been. 339 00:15:35.840 --> 00:15:40.039 Yeah, that does been good experiences? Or did you not 340 00:15:40.159 --> 00:15:43.879 like it? Right? 341 00:15:44.279 --> 00:15:46.399 We get similar responses from everybody like this. 342 00:15:46.679 --> 00:15:48.240 Well, here's the deal. 343 00:15:48.480 --> 00:15:52.639 All the studios that I've shot for have been really 344 00:15:52.679 --> 00:15:55.360 good to me, and I think that part of the 345 00:15:55.399 --> 00:15:58.080 reason I'm going to preface this part of the reason 346 00:15:58.279 --> 00:16:01.639 is I'm an escort who does porn. I'm not a 347 00:16:01.679 --> 00:16:05.159 porn star who started escorting, which for the porn starts 348 00:16:05.200 --> 00:16:08.799 who are starting to escort, those boundaries you learn. 349 00:16:10.120 --> 00:16:10.879 Not in porn. 350 00:16:11.960 --> 00:16:15.720 You learn those boundaries when there's a client acting fucking crazy. 351 00:16:15.840 --> 00:16:16.279 You learned that. 352 00:16:16.799 --> 00:16:19.480 Yeah, I know that I am not a good whoror. 353 00:16:20.919 --> 00:16:21.399 Is that true? 354 00:16:21.559 --> 00:16:22.440 That is true? 355 00:16:22.679 --> 00:16:23.480 What makes you say that. 356 00:16:23.440 --> 00:16:30.679 I have to My boundaries are real icye, No, not lose. 357 00:16:31.519 --> 00:16:35.440 I get I even just like talking. I can't seal 358 00:16:35.480 --> 00:16:38.000 the deal because if someone gives me a weird anything weird, 359 00:16:38.039 --> 00:16:38.440 I'm like. 360 00:16:38.440 --> 00:16:41.279 No, Yeah, but I imagine Victor, you're kind of like 361 00:16:41.320 --> 00:16:43.759 that too. I feel like you've developed very much a 362 00:16:43.879 --> 00:16:45.759 strong sense of what you want and what you will 363 00:16:45.799 --> 00:16:47.159 tolerate and what you won't tolerate. 364 00:16:47.799 --> 00:16:50.039 Does that take away from business? I don't imagine. 365 00:16:50.519 --> 00:16:50.759 No. 366 00:16:50.919 --> 00:16:51.799 I feel like that's your. 367 00:16:51.759 --> 00:16:55.320 Draw, that is totally my draw. And I think that 368 00:16:56.240 --> 00:16:58.480 the way that I talk to people is like I've 369 00:16:58.559 --> 00:17:01.639 taken care of kids before, or I've you know, been 370 00:17:01.679 --> 00:17:05.599 a sister. And I think the approach of being really 371 00:17:05.839 --> 00:17:10.000 hyper masculine in talking to men doesn't really work. I 372 00:17:10.039 --> 00:17:14.240 think you need to talk to them like they're You're like, 373 00:17:14.319 --> 00:17:17.599 for me, I'm very like hey baby, like hey baby, 374 00:17:17.599 --> 00:17:19.400 I can't do that. I'm sorry baby, you know I 375 00:17:19.640 --> 00:17:22.880 very much. So like my domming, you have to earn 376 00:17:23.079 --> 00:17:25.759 me being mean. You kind of have to like earn 377 00:17:25.880 --> 00:17:28.839 me shutting you down because I know that people want that, right, 378 00:17:28.880 --> 00:17:30.759 so they come at me really hard, like people come 379 00:17:30.759 --> 00:17:32.599 at me really hard because they want to get punished 380 00:17:32.640 --> 00:17:33.039 for free. 381 00:17:33.839 --> 00:17:34.880 And if I'm just. 382 00:17:34.839 --> 00:17:40.880 Like no, baby, no, I can't do that, I want 383 00:17:40.960 --> 00:17:43.680 to poppy like baby, I want, I want. I want 384 00:17:43.680 --> 00:17:45.400 to give you that buy. I need money, you know, 385 00:17:45.680 --> 00:17:50.680 you know, and that draws you in and then you're like, okay, 386 00:17:50.680 --> 00:17:52.640 well I have this much, and I'm like okay, well 387 00:17:52.640 --> 00:17:55.160 what do you want baby? I'm seeking this and this 388 00:17:55.200 --> 00:17:56.240 and this, okay baby. 389 00:17:57.079 --> 00:17:58.319 And then once. 390 00:17:58.240 --> 00:18:03.720 That happens, I've softly handled the interaction with softness, so 391 00:18:03.759 --> 00:18:06.799 then I can lead with hardness safely, because if I 392 00:18:06.880 --> 00:18:09.279 lead with hardness and kink, then I'm going to get 393 00:18:09.279 --> 00:18:11.960 that same exact energy back and I'm gonna have to fight, 394 00:18:12.279 --> 00:18:13.680 and I just don't like doing that. 395 00:18:14.640 --> 00:18:18.599 Does the dom daddy side always particularly include an element 396 00:18:18.599 --> 00:18:20.960 of humiliation and punishment or is there do you like 397 00:18:21.640 --> 00:18:23.680 are you firm with a soft hand sometimes? 398 00:18:23.759 --> 00:18:27.960 Well, so I have like two domb personalities. They're actually 399 00:18:28.079 --> 00:18:31.279 very clear for me and I wear different outfits, so 400 00:18:31.319 --> 00:18:38.960 they are very actually very clear. Humiliation and shame and punishment. 401 00:18:39.759 --> 00:18:46.000