WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>But when you can walk up to a woman and

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<v Speaker 1>be yourself and say, Hey, what's up. I'm Robbie. I

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<v Speaker 1>want to meet you. What do you think of my style?

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<v Speaker 1>You don't have to You don't have to be stuck

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<v Speaker 1>on the dating apps. The world becomes your dating app.

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<v Speaker 1>Welcome back to be How to Get a Girlfriend Podcast.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm your host, dating coach Connell Barrett, here to help

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<v Speaker 1>you get a great girlfriend and to do it by

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<v Speaker 1>knowing exactly what to say and flirting like you mean it.

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<v Speaker 1>And I have a really special guest today because joining

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<v Speaker 1>me is Robbie. Robbie is a former client of mine

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<v Speaker 1>who now has a girlfriend and he has absolutely crushed

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<v Speaker 1>it with me, and he is going to share some

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<v Speaker 1>of his approaching and flirting struggles he used to have

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<v Speaker 1>and then talk about some of the breakthroughs that he had,

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<v Speaker 1>including one of the most amazing nights I've ever seen

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<v Speaker 1>a client of mine have. Welcome to the podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Robbie, Thank you very much for having me.

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<v Speaker 1>Thanks for being here. Man. I cannot tell you how

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<v Speaker 1>inspiring you are to other people. So you first came

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<v Speaker 1>to me way back last year and you were struggling,

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<v Speaker 1>as I recall you were dealing with some things like

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<v Speaker 1>social anxiety, and you just wanted to be able to

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<v Speaker 1>meet women out in the real world. Flirt chat, get

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<v Speaker 1>some dates, tell us about where you were when you

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<v Speaker 1>first spoke with me person.

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<v Speaker 2>So I think I'll basically go on a tangent about

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<v Speaker 2>my life how I always dealt with low self esteem.

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<v Speaker 2>How that pretty much pretty much I wouldn't wouldn't want

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<v Speaker 2>to say ruin to my teenage life, but impacted in

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<v Speaker 2>a really bad way. So I'm the kind of kid

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<v Speaker 2>who always dealt with really bad low self esteem. I

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<v Speaker 2>never thought of someone who's good looking or is deserving.

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<v Speaker 2>On top of that, I always had like social anxiety,

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<v Speaker 2>so not just dating, even in terms of just talking

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<v Speaker 2>to people, I always struggled with that. So basically, if

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<v Speaker 2>you had social anxiety and also low self esteem, whether

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<v Speaker 2>it's your social life or your dating life, both, it's

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<v Speaker 2>going to be heavily impacted. And that's what happened to

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<v Speaker 2>me when I was in my teens. Also a kind

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<v Speaker 2>of translator over to my adulthood as well. So I

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<v Speaker 2>think till I was off a certain age, I'm in

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<v Speaker 2>my early twenties. But let's say till I was twenty

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<v Speaker 2>two or twenty one ish. I always struggled to talk

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<v Speaker 2>to anyone, just not in terms of dating, but just

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<v Speaker 2>making friends in general. And I always felt that why

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<v Speaker 2>would anyone want to talk to me. I'm not smart,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm not somewhat interesting. I don't really have any value

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<v Speaker 2>to offer. So I really had to work on myself

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<v Speaker 2>in terms of self confidence and stuff. That's when I

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<v Speaker 2>was when I turned twenty one, I had to work

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<v Speaker 2>with a therapist who helped me with whom I shared

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<v Speaker 2>pretty much everything about of my life in terms of

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<v Speaker 2>the low self esteem phase, confidence and stuff. And that's

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<v Speaker 2>when she started helping me out rebuilding my low self esteem,

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<v Speaker 2>rebuilding my confidence and self esteem. Around the same time,

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<v Speaker 2>I was introduced to this book called Law of Attraction okay,

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<v Speaker 2>and it kind of talks about how if you believe

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<v Speaker 2>in something, you are really close to turning that into reality.

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<v Speaker 2>And that was a really life changing moment to me,

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<v Speaker 2>coupled with the therapy I was going through, and that's

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<v Speaker 2>when I really started to, let's say, rebuild my image

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<v Speaker 2>or my confidence that I have in my own mind.

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<v Speaker 2>I was the kind of person who I wouldn't respect

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<v Speaker 2>myself that much.

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<v Speaker 1>Man, jump in, Robbie and ask you a question. Go ahead,

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<v Speaker 1>because self doubt is the big bad wolf of men

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<v Speaker 1>who struggle with dating, feeling like they're missing something. They're

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<v Speaker 1>not valuable, They're not worth something, not tall enough, not

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<v Speaker 1>good looking enough, not charismatic, not something enough. What was

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<v Speaker 1>the thing you doubted about yourself?

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<v Speaker 2>That's a really good point you bring now, So pretty

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<v Speaker 2>much everything, I'll just go into the details. My hide

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<v Speaker 2>was definitely one of the things I was insecure off.

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<v Speaker 2>I am about five eight, okay. I in my teen years,

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<v Speaker 2>I used to have buck teeth, so that's something I

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<v Speaker 2>really struggled with. I didn't get braces until I was

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<v Speaker 2>twenty one, okay. Then I was losing hair when I

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<v Speaker 2>was nineteen. I'm under some medication, so now my hair

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<v Speaker 2>is in okay condition. But there was a time when

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<v Speaker 2>I would say I was literally half bald. So I

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<v Speaker 2>was really with how I looked in the mirror. I

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't in the best physical condition as well. I wouldn't

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<v Speaker 2>like what I would see in the mirror.

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<v Speaker 1>Right, okay. And so when your mind is focused on

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<v Speaker 1>not tall enough, don't have the hair, what do my

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<v Speaker 1>teeth look like? It's hard to have the confidence to

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<v Speaker 1>go socialize with people, let alone go approach a beautiful woman.

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<v Speaker 2>Right, exactly, totally agree.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, yeah, I didn't want to jump in, but feel

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<v Speaker 1>like a lot of guys say, Connell, what do you say?

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<v Speaker 1>What do I say when I approach a woman? And

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<v Speaker 1>I've got all the best flirty moves in the world.

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<v Speaker 1>But if they're not if those flirtatious lines aren't coming

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<v Speaker 1>from a guy who believes in himself and knows he's

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<v Speaker 1>the shit, how well is it going to work? Right?

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<v Speaker 2>Exactly right. So I was at a position where I

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<v Speaker 2>didn't have respect for myself in the sense that I

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<v Speaker 2>wouldn't think I'm deserving of anything. And that's when my

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<v Speaker 2>my therapist came in to help me, and she would

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<v Speaker 2>emphasize on the importance of self respect self confidence, and

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<v Speaker 2>that's when, along with the book I was reading, Lulf Attraction,

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<v Speaker 2>it kind of changed my viewpoint on myself and I

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<v Speaker 2>strongly believe if you have a hard time respecting yourself,

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<v Speaker 2>there's a high chance you're going to struggle respecting someone

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<v Speaker 2>else as well. Yeah, so that's when I started working

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<v Speaker 2>on my self confidence. But I still felt there was

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<v Speaker 2>something missing and that's where mister Condall Barrett came into

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<v Speaker 2>the picture.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, I coached my younger self, and I saw so

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<v Speaker 1>much of the younger me when you and I first spoke,

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<v Speaker 1>because I used to be racked with self doubt. You

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<v Speaker 1>know my stories better than anybody. But the first night

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<v Speaker 1>I every went out to approach women first, I had

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<v Speaker 1>a panic attack in the bathroom because I was so

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<v Speaker 1>afraid that, Oh, women don't want some nerdy, shy, nice,

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<v Speaker 1>funny but not sexy, charismatic injury to come talk to them.

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<v Speaker 1>They want chads and alpha males and cool guys. So

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<v Speaker 1>I'm literally puking in the bathroom because I was so nervous.

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<v Speaker 1>That's what that fear. Self doubt basically turns an approach

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<v Speaker 1>from guy talking to a girl, which is all it

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<v Speaker 1>is to judgment day on your worth as a man. Right.

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<v Speaker 1>I remember when you and I first talked, because I

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<v Speaker 1>do these consultation calls. Anybody can chat with me and

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<v Speaker 1>tell me what's going on, see if I can help them.

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<v Speaker 1>And you told me a story that resonated with me.

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<v Speaker 1>Remind me if you would wasn't there a cashier who

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<v Speaker 1>you had a crush on where you couldn't talk to her,

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<v Speaker 1>How did you ask her out or show your interest?

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<v Speaker 1>Tell that story if you would.

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<v Speaker 2>That's a pretty embarrassing story. But now I find it

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<v Speaker 2>extremely funny now, and I think this is the embarrassing

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<v Speaker 2>situations which really sets you free and you can Once

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<v Speaker 2>you're okay with making a fool out of yourself in

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<v Speaker 2>this world, that's when you're like free literally do anything

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<v Speaker 2>I feel. And as much as I was embarrassed back

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<v Speaker 2>then and now I kind of see it at some

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<v Speaker 2>form of milestone, probably not the best one, Bud. Yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>it definitely had an impact in my life.

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<v Speaker 1>So I.

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<v Speaker 2>Remember I was during that time. I was still going

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<v Speaker 2>through a really rough breakup and I was super depressed,

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<v Speaker 2>and I would ask myself why didn't my relationship work out?

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<v Speaker 2>And ride around that time. There's the supermarket close to

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<v Speaker 2>my house. One day, one evening, I just go there

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<v Speaker 2>and I find this extremely beautiful cashier and the first

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<v Speaker 2>thought in my mind, I was like, you know what,

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<v Speaker 2>I've had a rough breakup, and I think this is

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<v Speaker 2>a sign from the world. Let me just go and

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<v Speaker 2>ask her out, okay, And coupled with my depression, my

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<v Speaker 2>little self esteem, I couldn't even look into her eyes.

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<v Speaker 2>I was so freak doubt. I just didn't have the

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<v Speaker 2>courage at all. So I remember I went back not

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<v Speaker 2>being able to talk to her, beating myself up, and

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<v Speaker 2>I was like, no, no, I have to come up

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<v Speaker 2>with a strategy. You have to come up with something

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<v Speaker 2>to finally ask her out. And I remember I had

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<v Speaker 2>literally wrote a letter, like traditional old school style. It

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<v Speaker 2>was I think I still have the letter somewhere so embarrassing.

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<v Speaker 2>I don't. I try not to look into it that much,

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<v Speaker 2>but I still have it literally in my desk, which

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<v Speaker 2>is right next to me right now.

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<v Speaker 1>What do you remember about anything that you wrote to her?

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<v Speaker 2>It was something like the moment I saw you, the

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<v Speaker 2>beauty everything. I was mesmerized by your looks and I

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<v Speaker 2>couldn't stop thinking about you. And I want to take

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<v Speaker 2>this moment to let you know that I am deeply

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<v Speaker 2>in love with you. All sorts of stuff, all sorts

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<v Speaker 2>of old school stuff that you can imagine.

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<v Speaker 1>Off to a woman you never talked to, I never

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<v Speaker 1>talked to. And did you give it and tell us

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<v Speaker 1>what happened next? Did you give her the note?

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<v Speaker 2>I tried, probably four to five times. I would just

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<v Speaker 2>go to the store by random bs for no reason,

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<v Speaker 2>just so that I could talk to this girl. And

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<v Speaker 2>the only conversation we've had till now is Hi, do

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<v Speaker 2>you need a back?

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<v Speaker 1>Yeast her and all she knows is paper of plastic

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<v Speaker 1>pretty much. So did you ever give her the actual note?

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<v Speaker 1>Or no?

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<v Speaker 2>No, I could never have enough courage to go up

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<v Speaker 2>to her and tell her that I liked her. And yeah,

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<v Speaker 2>that's that's that's one of the stories, which I wouldn't

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<v Speaker 2>call it an unfinished love story or whatever, but I'm

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<v Speaker 2>kind of glad it happened because that's one of the

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<v Speaker 2>times which really asked me, like, what's what? What's wrong

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<v Speaker 2>with me? Why can't I just go to anyone approach

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<v Speaker 2>someone whom I like? And that's around the same time

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<v Speaker 2>when I decided that no, I need someone with experience

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<v Speaker 2>to help me out.

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<v Speaker 1>Right, Well, it's an understandable question, what's wrong with me?

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<v Speaker 1>Of course? The answer is nothing is wrong with you.

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<v Speaker 1>There is something a little bit funky with the way

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<v Speaker 1>your what I call the lower self thinks about himself. Right,

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<v Speaker 1>what's wrong with me? Oh? Those stories of I'm not

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<v Speaker 1>my teeth aren't good enough, I'm not tall enough. Why

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<v Speaker 1>would she want me. That's the problem, not you. It's basically,

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<v Speaker 1>you are a state of the art computer, but you

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<v Speaker 1>had Windows ninety seven operating system. Look at me dating

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<v Speaker 1>myself Windows ninety seven. But I had a similar story

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<v Speaker 1>way before I ever got my dating life handled. I

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<v Speaker 1>had a crush on a cute Starbucks barista at the

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<v Speaker 1>Starbucks on thirty third Street and Park Avenue here in

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<v Speaker 1>New York City. I wrote her a little love note

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<v Speaker 1>on my business card at a golf magazine at the time,

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<v Speaker 1>and I walked up and I gave it to her.

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<v Speaker 1>But I didn't say a word, and I not literally,

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<v Speaker 1>but I felt like I ran out of the Starbucks like,

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<v Speaker 1>here's here's a note and it said, you know, hi,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm Connell. I've come here all the time, and you're

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<v Speaker 1>so pretty, and I wondered if you might want to

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<v Speaker 1>go on to date something like that, And shockingly, I

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<v Speaker 1>never heard from her, What a what a shock? And

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<v Speaker 1>heard right here, yeah, And so that's not the kind

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<v Speaker 1>of communication that's going to get a woman's attention, right.

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<v Speaker 1>There's nothing wrong with taking a chance. It's how we

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<v Speaker 1>do it, right. And so you and I started working together,

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<v Speaker 1>and do you remember the first approach you did while

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<v Speaker 1>we were talking together. I don't mean that night out,

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<v Speaker 1>but I know you did some approaching before we went

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<v Speaker 1>out for a fateful night that you had, which we're

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<v Speaker 1>going to get to, but tell me about how approaching

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<v Speaker 1>felt to you at first.

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<v Speaker 2>I still remember the approaches I did before the night

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<v Speaker 2>out we did. And one of the things I remember,

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<v Speaker 2>I think I was just walking down somewhere in Fidei,

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<v Speaker 2>New York, and there's this beautiful lady. I think she

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<v Speaker 2>was doing some some sort of tech talk video or something,

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<v Speaker 2>and I was like, you know what, I just want

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<v Speaker 2>to go up to and compliment her. I don't have

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<v Speaker 2>to ask her out or anything. And even then I

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<v Speaker 2>was like struggling with building up my courage and everything.

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<v Speaker 2>And I remember I went up to her. I couldn't

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<v Speaker 2>even like lock in my eyes with her eyes, and

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<v Speaker 2>I remember I was just like, this, huh, you look

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<v Speaker 2>really pretty. I just wanted to let you know about

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<v Speaker 2>I just like and I think she she thanked me,

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<v Speaker 2>but before she couldn't even reply. I just ran away

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<v Speaker 2>from that.

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<v Speaker 1>From there, I wonder who was running faster, you from

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<v Speaker 1>her or me from the cute Starbucks for Resa we

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<v Speaker 1>could have had a tube of two man foot race,

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<v Speaker 1>but at least you did it. You started right, you

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<v Speaker 1>took some kind of action, and did you find that

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<v Speaker 1>it began to get a little bit easier Because every

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<v Speaker 1>approach typically it gets at least one or two percent

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<v Speaker 1>easier every time you do it. What was your feeling

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<v Speaker 1>for the first half dozen or so any breakthrough moments,

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<v Speaker 1>not counting our night out.

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<v Speaker 2>So when I realize is every approach ends up teaching

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<v Speaker 2>you something. So from that moment specifically, I realized I

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't making eye contact. And if I'm not making eye contact,

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<v Speaker 2>sometimes even a person would be struggling to know if

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<v Speaker 2>I'm really trying to talk to them. Am I really

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<v Speaker 2>serious when I'm talking about literally anything? Yeah, maybe there's

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<v Speaker 2>a chance that that person just might not take me

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<v Speaker 2>seriously if I'm not making eye contact right.

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<v Speaker 1>Absolutely. One of the biggest mistakes our minds make when

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<v Speaker 1>we want to approach a one is we look at

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<v Speaker 1>it as win lose. Either I get her number and

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<v Speaker 1>she likes me, or I failed and I'm unworthy and

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<v Speaker 1>I should probably go marry a real doll or become

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<v Speaker 1>a monk. You know, we look at approaching as win loss,

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<v Speaker 1>and that's why it feels so high stakes. But you

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<v Speaker 1>said something great. You looked at it as win learn, Right,

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<v Speaker 1>Let's learn it. Let's approach and learn a lesson from it.

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<v Speaker 1>Better eye contact, louder voice, try a different icebreaker. And

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<v Speaker 1>that's a really smart way to do it, because if

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<v Speaker 1>we take approaching from a win loss to a win learn,

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<v Speaker 1>then we stop associating so much pain to it. Sure

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<v Speaker 1>art associating with Well, no matter what happens, I'm going

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<v Speaker 1>to get value from this. I'm either going to get

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<v Speaker 1>a Q girl's number, whichuld be amazing, or at least

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<v Speaker 1>I'll learn something about myself or grow in some way percent. Okay,

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<v Speaker 1>so let's talk about an amazing night. It's one of

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<v Speaker 1>the most incredible nights I've ever seen a client of mine.

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<v Speaker 1>Have just a planning the background here. I do something

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<v Speaker 1>about once a month called Fearless Friday, the Night of

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<v Speaker 1>a hundred Approaches, where a handful of my New York

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<v Speaker 1>City guys or anybody who's in New York who I'm coaching,

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<v Speaker 1>we go out for a night and we try to

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<v Speaker 1>as a group get to one hundred total of approaches.

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<v Speaker 1>I even brought up bring a little ticker, a little clicker.

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<v Speaker 1>You might remember that the guy who approaches the girls tonight,

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<v Speaker 1>I'll be his coach for life. I think that motivated you.

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<v Speaker 1>So talk about that night, talk about the beginning of

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<v Speaker 1>the night of what happened that night. Tell us a

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<v Speaker 1>little story about the night Friday, what happened with you?

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<v Speaker 2>The viewers are in for a ride. It was. It

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<v Speaker 2>was one of the most awesome yet strange in a

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<v Speaker 2>good way kind of a day for me. And I

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<v Speaker 2>remember I had a photoshoot session the same day.

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<v Speaker 1>Right, I'm dating, right, yes, And I.

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<v Speaker 2>Was talking to the photographer friend of mine and she's lovely,

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<v Speaker 2>she's amazing, and we're just talking about dating in general,

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<v Speaker 2>the kind of experience she's had, and she asked, someone

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<v Speaker 2>who's more experienced than me, how would she how does

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<v Speaker 2>she think about her stuff? And I was sharing my

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<v Speaker 2>insecurities and stuff with her because she's such a great friend,

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<v Speaker 2>and she was I remember she was telling me, you

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<v Speaker 2>know what, don't worry, I'm sure like you're gonna be

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<v Speaker 2>one of the better looking guys out there today, okay.

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<v Speaker 2>And I was like, okay, that that helps cut to you.

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<v Speaker 2>Myself and the other clients actually meeting up.

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<v Speaker 1>In your garden Houston Street, six or seven of us

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<v Speaker 1>take it from there.

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<v Speaker 2>So literally every guy saw just gave me a new

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<v Speaker 2>sense of insecurity. Now I'm just keeping it as raw

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<v Speaker 2>as I can. So so I so somewhere, I was

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<v Speaker 2>really shitting my pants that day because I've it's it's

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<v Speaker 2>approaching night, it's it can't be scary, and as it

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<v Speaker 2>was for me and somewhere, I don't know. I was

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<v Speaker 2>just trying to justify myself being there. And one of

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<v Speaker 2>the things I had in my mind was I just

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<v Speaker 2>tried to be one of the better looking guys that

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<v Speaker 2>night that far.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, and for stile, you mean your style or just

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<v Speaker 1>how you feel my.

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<v Speaker 2>Style, how I look naturally as well. And every guy

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<v Speaker 2>that came up that day that night I felt was

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<v Speaker 2>either taller than me, blue eyes, nice looking hair, better

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<v Speaker 2>looking beard. Yeah, I remember.

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<v Speaker 1>Taylor early, Remember Taylor. I think Taylor looks like Bradley Cooper.

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<v Speaker 1>I agree, I'm the straight dude. I'm kind of into him.

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<v Speaker 1>Let me we're going on tomorrow night. I hope we'll

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<v Speaker 1>make out anyway, Go ahead, What are you saying?

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<v Speaker 2>So I was I think there was like some I

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<v Speaker 2>think six or seven of us, right, yeah. And there

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<v Speaker 2>was a time when I was like, I have to

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<v Speaker 2>be I hope I'm just better looking ban I shouldn't

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<v Speaker 2>think like this way, but I'm just keeping it as

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<v Speaker 2>wrong as I can. And I was like, I hope

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<v Speaker 2>I can just be taller than one single guy out there,

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<v Speaker 2>be better looking than one single guy out there. And

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<v Speaker 2>I was I was literally shitting my pants every time

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<v Speaker 2>someone knew would come up and I'm like, no, there's

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<v Speaker 2>no way I'm doing anything tonight.

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<v Speaker 1>And then Ryan Gosling came up and joined us, and

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<v Speaker 1>you were like, Connell, come on, man, you're killing me.

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<v Speaker 2>That was literally my reaction.

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<v Speaker 1>That's great, You're tuning into something important because what we

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<v Speaker 1>do when we go out to a bar to approach girls,

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<v Speaker 1>we look around the room and we try to make

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<v Speaker 1>sense of where do I fit in the the what's

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<v Speaker 1>the word like the status of this bar? How confident

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<v Speaker 1>can I be? Am I better looking than him? Am

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<v Speaker 1>I taller than him? And that is what the lower self,

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<v Speaker 1>that voice of self doubt does. It fucks with us.

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<v Speaker 1>It is like pouring poison into our ears. And don't

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<v Speaker 1>we don't want to fight it. You just want to

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<v Speaker 1>be aware of it. It's like, there's this concept in

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<v Speaker 1>zen Buddhism called watching the thinker. Eckart comes from Eckart Tole.

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<v Speaker 1>I think it originates with zen Buddhism. You watch the thoughts,

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<v Speaker 1>but you don't get sucked into them. You're like, oh,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm noticing how tall and attractive all these other guys

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<v Speaker 1>are interesting, as opposed to going, oh man, I'm just

357
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<v Speaker 1>not attractive and as cool as all these other people.

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<v Speaker 1>And then that hurts your emotions and confidence, and then

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<v Speaker 1>you don't approach anybody. So, okay, you had your pre

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00:20:36.759 --> 00:20:39.920
<v Speaker 1>approach kind of nerves or moment of I'm not good

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<v Speaker 1>looking enough. By the way, you are measurably twenty seven

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<v Speaker 1>times handsomer than I am, I can say, and you

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00:20:48.799 --> 00:20:52.400
<v Speaker 1>actually have muscles. I'm like, but okay, so you're in

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<v Speaker 1>your head, you're comparing yourself to all these other guys,

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<v Speaker 1>and then it's the moment of truth. I say, all right, guys,

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<v Speaker 1>Night of one hundred approaches Fearless Friday. It starts now,

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<v Speaker 1>and then it was time for everybody to start approaching.

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<v Speaker 1>I did a quick approach, just talk to a couple

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<v Speaker 1>of girls, nearby. Nothing amazing happened. My girlfriend is with us, right,

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<v Speaker 1>I remember weird I'm approaching girls with my girlfriend there,

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<v Speaker 1>but she's cool with it, she understands. And then I

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<v Speaker 1>got a couple approaches down. Then I'm like, okay, guys,

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<v Speaker 1>now it's your turn. Do you remember what happened next

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<v Speaker 1>with you and me?

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<v Speaker 2>I one hundred percent remember go on, And I'm not

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<v Speaker 2>sure if you recall the same event, but I'm just

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<v Speaker 2>gonna say it. I don't know if you remember my

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<v Speaker 2>first approach up that night.

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<v Speaker 1>I think I do, but you tell.

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<v Speaker 2>Me, and I mean, speaking an assumption. I think that

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<v Speaker 2>was probably one of the more embarrassing situations, just probably

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<v Speaker 2>embarrassing only to me. But what happened I remember was

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<v Speaker 2>there was this group of girls, probably five or six

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<v Speaker 2>of them, and they were like dancing to some song.

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<v Speaker 2>They were like, really vibe. I remember you coming up

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<v Speaker 2>to me and you're like, so you're going to make

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<v Speaker 2>your next move now? And I was like, yes, I

388
00:22:00.799 --> 00:22:02.559
<v Speaker 2>see a group of girls and I think I'm gonna

389
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<v Speaker 2>go talk to them, and you're like, that's what I mean,

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00:22:05.880 --> 00:22:11.160
<v Speaker 2>that's right to make a move. I tried my best

391
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<v Speaker 2>to build up all the courage, and I remember I'm

392
00:22:15.000 --> 00:22:20.400
<v Speaker 2>walking past them, and I lose all my confidence, all

393
00:22:20.480 --> 00:22:25.000
<v Speaker 2>my courage. I didn't make any eye contact, and I

394
00:22:25.119 --> 00:22:28.319
<v Speaker 2>just said randomly, hey, girls, I really love the way

395
00:22:28.359 --> 00:22:31.920
<v Speaker 2>you guys were dancing. And no one looked at me

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<v Speaker 2>except one girl. Even when she looked at me, she

397
00:22:35.480 --> 00:22:38.480
<v Speaker 2>probably was thinking like, who the hell is this guy? Yeah,

398
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<v Speaker 2>and I was so embarrassed. I just kept walking. I

399
00:22:41.640 --> 00:22:45.559
<v Speaker 2>just kept walking straight, acting like, oh, I have something

400
00:22:45.559 --> 00:22:47.599
<v Speaker 2>important to do. Someone's calling me, so I'm just gonna

401
00:22:47.599 --> 00:22:51.359
<v Speaker 2>pick up this phone call on that side. But in truth,

402
00:22:52.039 --> 00:22:55.640
<v Speaker 2>nothing like that happened. They just completely ignored me, I felt,

403
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<v Speaker 2>or maybe I just didn't approach the right way.

404
00:22:59.279 --> 00:23:01.960
<v Speaker 1>Was either stay that way there watching okay, we're there,

405
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<v Speaker 1>so that I did notice, you do that right? Remember

406
00:23:04.960 --> 00:23:08.279
<v Speaker 1>what happened right before? Remember the deal I made. I

407
00:23:08.640 --> 00:23:12.000
<v Speaker 1>told the guys the headlock approach or headlocks. Hold on,

408
00:23:12.079 --> 00:23:18.000
<v Speaker 1>my cat is about to knockleck hold on, Oh say

409
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<v Speaker 1>hi to YouTube. This is this is Reggie. This is

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<v Speaker 1>my little Katie, my little ginger boy. Anyway, Okay, I

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00:23:27.119 --> 00:23:29.480
<v Speaker 1>don't want him knock this guitar over behind me. So

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<v Speaker 1>as I recall, I make a deal with my clients.

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<v Speaker 1>We go out to approach girls, I say, all you

414
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<v Speaker 1>got to do tonight is take action, and you and

415
00:23:37.680 --> 00:23:39.240
<v Speaker 1>I are going to be good. But if you don't

416
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<v Speaker 1>take action, if you don't approach a girl when I

417
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<v Speaker 1>want you to, I'll put you in a headlock and

418
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<v Speaker 1>I will walk over to you with you under my arm,

419
00:23:46.680 --> 00:23:49.759
<v Speaker 1>and I will say to these ladies, excuse me. My friend,

420
00:23:50.000 --> 00:23:53.000
<v Speaker 1>my buddy Robbie here wanted to approach you, but he

421
00:23:53.119 --> 00:23:55.960
<v Speaker 1>was too big of a pussy. Say hi, Robbie. So

422
00:23:56.000 --> 00:23:59.839
<v Speaker 1>it's either approach like a man or get a headlock approach.

423
00:24:00.400 --> 00:24:02.359
<v Speaker 1>I think you knew that, and you just said, okay,

424
00:24:02.400 --> 00:24:06.920
<v Speaker 1>it's time to start talking to women exactly. I remember,

425
00:24:07.160 --> 00:24:08.240
<v Speaker 1>Oh go ahead, I'll shut up.

426
00:24:08.599 --> 00:24:11.240
<v Speaker 2>I remember once I kept like walking straight and I

427
00:24:11.279 --> 00:24:12.960
<v Speaker 2>was acting like I was on the phone with someone.

428
00:24:13.039 --> 00:24:14.359
<v Speaker 2>You came up to your lefe.

429
00:24:16.720 --> 00:24:18.759
<v Speaker 1>And I was like ending to call.

430
00:24:20.319 --> 00:24:24.720
<v Speaker 2>Right, I was. I was so nervous at that point,

431
00:24:24.799 --> 00:24:26.079
<v Speaker 2>but yeah, I just didn't want to cut you off.

432
00:24:26.400 --> 00:24:29.160
<v Speaker 1>Well, this is a great lesson because the first approach

433
00:24:29.160 --> 00:24:32.319
<v Speaker 1>of the night is always the hardest. You're in your head,

434
00:24:32.480 --> 00:24:34.680
<v Speaker 1>you're not in the zone you've been thinking about all

435
00:24:34.720 --> 00:24:38.240
<v Speaker 1>this stuff, but I remember you doing maybe one or

436
00:24:38.240 --> 00:24:41.559
<v Speaker 1>two more approaches, and then all of a sudden, I

437
00:24:41.640 --> 00:24:43.480
<v Speaker 1>saw you talking to two women who were seated at

438
00:24:43.480 --> 00:24:48.359
<v Speaker 1>a bench, and your body language looked different. You just

439
00:24:48.400 --> 00:24:51.680
<v Speaker 1>looked really chill and relaxed. Tell us about the second

440
00:24:51.880 --> 00:24:54.720
<v Speaker 1>and third approaches and specifically what started to happen about

441
00:24:54.759 --> 00:24:57.359
<v Speaker 1>how you felt?

442
00:24:57.920 --> 00:25:00.559
<v Speaker 2>Great question, and just to give you some a bit

443
00:25:00.599 --> 00:25:03.799
<v Speaker 2>of context. I think it was Taylor or someone else

444
00:25:03.839 --> 00:25:09.039
<v Speaker 2>who approached those two girls already, okay, And I remember

445
00:25:09.160 --> 00:25:12.680
<v Speaker 2>to myself, I was like, Taylor, such an amazing, such

446
00:25:12.680 --> 00:25:15.079
<v Speaker 2>a good looking guy, and he'll already approached it. I

447
00:25:15.079 --> 00:25:18.720
<v Speaker 2>don't I don't remember him getting the number. So I

448
00:25:18.759 --> 00:25:21.240
<v Speaker 2>was like, there's no way I'm gonna get their number

449
00:25:21.279 --> 00:25:23.200
<v Speaker 2>by any means. But you know what, I'll just shoot

450
00:25:23.240 --> 00:25:26.519
<v Speaker 2>my shot. What's I mean, what can really go wrong?

451
00:25:26.640 --> 00:25:27.640
<v Speaker 1>Right? Yeah?

452
00:25:28.440 --> 00:25:31.240
<v Speaker 2>So I went up to them, and in my mind

453
00:25:31.400 --> 00:25:36.759
<v Speaker 2>I was like, instead of telling them straight up that hey,

454
00:25:36.960 --> 00:25:39.720
<v Speaker 2>you look really beautiful, emuntry number or something, let me

455
00:25:39.799 --> 00:25:42.440
<v Speaker 2>just start the conversation a slightly different way. So I

456
00:25:42.480 --> 00:25:46.079
<v Speaker 2>went up to them and I was like, Ladies, on

457
00:25:46.119 --> 00:25:47.880
<v Speaker 2>a scale of one to ten, what do you think

458
00:25:47.920 --> 00:25:53.759
<v Speaker 2>of my outfit, and I remember them taking my time

459
00:25:54.039 --> 00:25:59.319
<v Speaker 2>literally scanning top to bottom, and they they tell I

460
00:25:59.319 --> 00:26:01.960
<v Speaker 2>think I remember remember, I think they told me they

461
00:26:01.960 --> 00:26:03.119
<v Speaker 2>gave me a seven out of.

462
00:26:03.079 --> 00:26:04.599
<v Speaker 1>Ten, not bad.

463
00:26:05.119 --> 00:26:08.480
<v Speaker 2>That's also another conversation opener. So I was like, why seven?

464
00:26:08.519 --> 00:26:10.960
<v Speaker 2>Why not ten? What can I fix? Why don't you

465
00:26:10.960 --> 00:26:15.920
<v Speaker 2>guys like it? You guys are just haters, Betford. So

466
00:26:16.559 --> 00:26:19.839
<v Speaker 2>they they were really genuine or at least nice enough

467
00:26:19.880 --> 00:26:22.200
<v Speaker 2>with their explanation, and they were telling me you could

468
00:26:22.200 --> 00:26:24.279
<v Speaker 2>have add this your outfit, this or that. But it

469
00:26:24.359 --> 00:26:28.440
<v Speaker 2>was a really good conversation opener. And we were chatting

470
00:26:28.480 --> 00:26:31.319
<v Speaker 2>for like a good five minutes about it, my outfit,

471
00:26:31.440 --> 00:26:35.160
<v Speaker 2>their outfits. Then something came in my mind and I

472
00:26:35.240 --> 00:26:41.839
<v Speaker 2>was like, you know what if I guess your ethnic

473
00:26:41.920 --> 00:26:44.759
<v Speaker 2>background in the next three attempts, they're gonna give me

474
00:26:44.799 --> 00:26:45.240
<v Speaker 2>your number.

475
00:26:46.079 --> 00:26:48.559
<v Speaker 1>I didn't know this story. You became a game show.

476
00:26:49.599 --> 00:26:50.559
<v Speaker 2>I literally was.

477
00:26:50.799 --> 00:26:55.440
<v Speaker 1>I really was the ethnicity. I'm your host, Robbie. So

478
00:26:56.519 --> 00:26:57.160
<v Speaker 1>what happened next?

479
00:26:57.359 --> 00:27:01.720
<v Speaker 2>And guess what? I failed even on my fifth attempt,

480
00:27:01.920 --> 00:27:04.079
<v Speaker 2>and I think I passed probably on my seventh or eighth.

481
00:27:05.960 --> 00:27:09.279
<v Speaker 2>And I remember then they were like, you know what

482
00:27:09.319 --> 00:27:12.559
<v Speaker 2>I want to guess you're athnicity now, And they also

483
00:27:12.640 --> 00:27:15.039
<v Speaker 2>took probably like five or six attempts, but they were right.

484
00:27:16.000 --> 00:27:19.519
<v Speaker 2>And it was a funny game, I remember, And we

485
00:27:19.640 --> 00:27:22.039
<v Speaker 2>talked for a good ten to twelve minutes, and I

486
00:27:22.160 --> 00:27:24.720
<v Speaker 2>kind of felt the conversation wasn't really going anywhere and

487
00:27:24.759 --> 00:27:27.880
<v Speaker 2>I failed anyway, so I just told him, you know what,

488
00:27:27.920 --> 00:27:31.079
<v Speaker 2>it was lovely talking to you guys, so I'll just

489
00:27:31.200 --> 00:27:31.640
<v Speaker 2>do for you.

490
00:27:32.960 --> 00:27:35.359
<v Speaker 1>Did so many things well there, I the opener was great.

491
00:27:36.240 --> 00:27:40.880
<v Speaker 1>I've never seen Hey, can I get your opinion on

492
00:27:40.960 --> 00:27:44.559
<v Speaker 1>my style? Opener? Get rejected? I don't think I've ever

493
00:27:44.599 --> 00:27:46.759
<v Speaker 1>seen that in all my years coaching men with approaching.

494
00:27:46.799 --> 00:27:50.039
<v Speaker 1>That's a great go to opener. Hey excuse me, but

495
00:27:50.119 --> 00:27:51.720
<v Speaker 1>I like years better, not just what do you think

496
00:27:51.720 --> 00:27:53.960
<v Speaker 1>of my outfit scale of one to ten? That makes

497
00:27:54.000 --> 00:27:57.759
<v Speaker 1>her think And a great approach strategy is make her

498
00:27:57.839 --> 00:28:00.759
<v Speaker 1>an expert. We all like to be right. You're a

499
00:28:00.759 --> 00:28:03.640
<v Speaker 1>tech guy, right, I was gonna ask you tech questions

500
00:28:03.720 --> 00:28:07.000
<v Speaker 1>or finance tech questions. You probably feel like, oh, connall,

501
00:28:07.440 --> 00:28:10.880
<v Speaker 1>let me tell you what women love being asked what

502
00:28:10.920 --> 00:28:14.359
<v Speaker 1>they think of a man's style. So great job, and

503
00:28:14.400 --> 00:28:17.799
<v Speaker 1>then you turned it into a guess are ethnicity game,

504
00:28:17.839 --> 00:28:21.400
<v Speaker 1>which is very playful because approaching dating, so much of

505
00:28:21.440 --> 00:28:25.559
<v Speaker 1>it is about playfulness. That playful vibe is what women like.

506
00:28:27.000 --> 00:28:30.359
<v Speaker 2>And guess what. It doesn't end there go on right

507
00:28:30.480 --> 00:28:33.200
<v Speaker 2>as when I was trying to leave, she stopped me

508
00:28:33.599 --> 00:28:36.079
<v Speaker 2>and she said, so you're just gonna leave without asking

509
00:28:36.079 --> 00:28:40.279
<v Speaker 2>me for a number, And I was like, now we're talking.

510
00:28:41.240 --> 00:28:44.240
<v Speaker 2>And then she was telling me how she really appreciated

511
00:28:44.480 --> 00:28:46.559
<v Speaker 2>and she found it really brave that I came up

512
00:28:46.599 --> 00:28:48.319
<v Speaker 2>to her and talked to her, and I was like,

513
00:28:50.000 --> 00:28:54.640
<v Speaker 2>this is lovely. Just ten minutes ago, I was living

514
00:28:54.680 --> 00:28:57.039
<v Speaker 2>inside my head. I was like, this is the end

515
00:28:57.039 --> 00:29:00.640
<v Speaker 2>of the world. No one's gonna talk to me. I'm

516
00:29:00.680 --> 00:29:04.799
<v Speaker 2>done this amazing This good looking guy, Taylor, he went

517
00:29:04.920 --> 00:29:08.160
<v Speaker 2>up to them and I don't want to ex word rejected,

518
00:29:08.240 --> 00:29:09.920
<v Speaker 2>but maybe he was, which is not a big deal.

519
00:29:09.960 --> 00:29:12.240
<v Speaker 2>But I was like, if he gets rejected, there's no

520
00:29:12.319 --> 00:29:15.920
<v Speaker 2>way I would ever get their number. And here I am.

521
00:29:16.440 --> 00:29:20.519
<v Speaker 2>They are telling me how attractive they find me. They

522
00:29:20.559 --> 00:29:23.279
<v Speaker 2>are telling me how brave of stuff that I'm doing.

523
00:29:23.839 --> 00:29:26.480
<v Speaker 2>And I ended up with a number. Yeah, and she

524
00:29:26.680 --> 00:29:30.160
<v Speaker 2>takes my phone. She also puts her name on it

525
00:29:30.400 --> 00:29:32.279
<v Speaker 2>and then she also puts the name of the bar

526
00:29:32.400 --> 00:29:36.480
<v Speaker 2>in it, and she also says something I forgot the

527
00:29:36.519 --> 00:29:39.839
<v Speaker 2>exact line, but she made that assumption that I probably

528
00:29:39.880 --> 00:29:41.640
<v Speaker 2>got a lot of curls. I probably do this all

529
00:29:41.640 --> 00:29:45.559
<v Speaker 2>the time, and I'm like really popular out there or something.

530
00:29:45.640 --> 00:29:48.279
<v Speaker 1>But are you saying that You're trying to make sure

531
00:29:48.319 --> 00:29:52.480
<v Speaker 1>you remember which babe from your bevy of babes she

532
00:29:52.640 --> 00:29:59.759
<v Speaker 1>is exactly. Oh that's so funny. The Houston bar Pink.

533
00:30:00.799 --> 00:30:03.640
<v Speaker 1>You know, you remember me right what it's done.

534
00:30:05.279 --> 00:30:08.720
<v Speaker 2>And then I remember I hugged her, and then I

535
00:30:08.759 --> 00:30:10.559
<v Speaker 2>came up to you guys and I was like, got

536
00:30:10.599 --> 00:30:13.759
<v Speaker 2>her number, and you guys all are like cheering for me.

537
00:30:13.799 --> 00:30:14.720
<v Speaker 2>It was. It was lovely.

538
00:30:15.640 --> 00:30:19.119
<v Speaker 1>I love that story because she told you something powerful.

539
00:30:19.640 --> 00:30:23.799
<v Speaker 1>Women like a guy to come approach. It shows bravery.

540
00:30:24.440 --> 00:30:27.240
<v Speaker 1>It shows this guy's got options. But he's talking to me.

541
00:30:28.240 --> 00:30:30.759
<v Speaker 1>Think about the signals that sense. The very act of

542
00:30:30.799 --> 00:30:34.039
<v Speaker 1>approaching a woman tells her this guy's worthy of me.

543
00:30:35.680 --> 00:30:37.359
<v Speaker 1>And boy, did you find that out?

544
00:30:39.039 --> 00:30:41.279
<v Speaker 2>Yeah? I mean I still I was still remembering the

545
00:30:41.279 --> 00:30:43.880
<v Speaker 2>incident from time to time. But guess what, that was

546
00:30:43.920 --> 00:30:44.880
<v Speaker 2>only the beginning of that.

547
00:30:44.920 --> 00:30:47.519
<v Speaker 1>Night, right exactly, So that was your first number at

548
00:30:47.519 --> 00:30:49.720
<v Speaker 1>Houston Hall. That's where we were, right. Did you get

549
00:30:49.720 --> 00:30:50.559
<v Speaker 1>any more numbers there?

550
00:30:51.160 --> 00:30:53.799
<v Speaker 2>I think I got a couple or three more.

551
00:30:54.039 --> 00:30:56.920
<v Speaker 1>At Houston Hall. Yes, So yeah, so you're crushing it.

552
00:30:57.400 --> 00:31:00.279
<v Speaker 1>I'm with my girlfriend, I'm helping other guys who are

553
00:31:00.359 --> 00:31:02.880
<v Speaker 1>not taking nearly as much action as you. That's okay.

554
00:31:03.039 --> 00:31:06.000
<v Speaker 1>You were just in the zone. And how are you

555
00:31:06.039 --> 00:31:07.880
<v Speaker 1>feeling at that point after two or three numbers? How

556
00:31:07.880 --> 00:31:08.960
<v Speaker 1>are you feeling about yourself?

557
00:31:09.640 --> 00:31:12.720
<v Speaker 2>So I still remember that moment. I think right before

558
00:31:12.839 --> 00:31:18.160
<v Speaker 2>I made my first approach, I was constantly thinking should

559
00:31:18.240 --> 00:31:20.640
<v Speaker 2>I drink something before I go approach or that it

560
00:31:20.720 --> 00:31:22.559
<v Speaker 2>kind of like calms me down a little bit. And

561
00:31:22.559 --> 00:31:26.079
<v Speaker 2>then something just told me, you know what, No, you

562
00:31:26.400 --> 00:31:29.960
<v Speaker 2>got to phase the fear. And at that point after

563
00:31:30.160 --> 00:31:34.519
<v Speaker 2>that successful approach, I was thanking myself for not drinking

564
00:31:34.640 --> 00:31:37.279
<v Speaker 2>or being under the influence of alcohol. And I was like,

565
00:31:37.319 --> 00:31:40.079
<v Speaker 2>you know what this feels. I think this achievement feels

566
00:31:40.200 --> 00:31:43.160
<v Speaker 2>way better than compared to if I was under the

567
00:31:43.160 --> 00:31:47.559
<v Speaker 2>influence of any fornt of alcohol. Yeah, and I had

568
00:31:47.640 --> 00:31:50.160
<v Speaker 2>this high where I was like I was on the

569
00:31:50.200 --> 00:31:53.559
<v Speaker 2>top of the world. I could achieve anything. The book

570
00:31:53.559 --> 00:31:56.960
<v Speaker 2>the Law of attraction. Everything is like my manifestation is

571
00:31:57.000 --> 00:31:58.880
<v Speaker 2>coming into reality. That's what I was feeling like.

572
00:31:59.119 --> 00:32:01.720
<v Speaker 1>Well, that identity that you named yourself. When we first

573
00:32:01.759 --> 00:32:07.119
<v Speaker 1>spoke supremely confident, Robbie, you could feel that supreme confidence

574
00:32:07.200 --> 00:32:10.720
<v Speaker 1>rise right. And then we switched venues. We went to

575
00:32:10.759 --> 00:32:13.920
<v Speaker 1>a different place, a place called the Broken Shaker, and

576
00:32:14.640 --> 00:32:20.119
<v Speaker 1>that was really when I saw you floating. You were

577
00:32:20.160 --> 00:32:23.680
<v Speaker 1>like two feet off the rooftop there. You were just

578
00:32:23.759 --> 00:32:26.160
<v Speaker 1>kind of floating around the bar, walking up to different women.

579
00:32:26.640 --> 00:32:28.759
<v Speaker 1>There was such an assumption that this was going to

580
00:32:28.799 --> 00:32:30.839
<v Speaker 1>go well. There was even a moment when it was Jess,

581
00:32:30.839 --> 00:32:34.640
<v Speaker 1>my girlfriend, myself and my personal trainer Zach came with

582
00:32:34.720 --> 00:32:37.599
<v Speaker 1>us and a couple other clients. I said, everybody, watch Robbie.

583
00:32:37.799 --> 00:32:41.240
<v Speaker 1>Look at him. This is what higher self in the

584
00:32:41.319 --> 00:32:43.799
<v Speaker 1>zone looks like. And you approached. I think, I eve

585
00:32:43.880 --> 00:32:46.000
<v Speaker 1>it was the only time I told you to approach again,

586
00:32:46.839 --> 00:32:49.279
<v Speaker 1>and you did it fearlessly. But I said, dude, look

587
00:32:49.279 --> 00:32:50.920
<v Speaker 1>at those two women over there, and you just said, oh,

588
00:32:50.960 --> 00:32:53.160
<v Speaker 1>I'll be right back, and went over to the two

589
00:32:54.079 --> 00:32:57.359
<v Speaker 1>dimes of the rooftop. Other than my girlfriend, of course,

590
00:32:57.799 --> 00:33:00.960
<v Speaker 1>the two dimes, and then they were I don't know

591
00:33:00.960 --> 00:33:03.960
<v Speaker 1>what happened, but they were just like hi, and they

592
00:33:04.000 --> 00:33:05.880
<v Speaker 1>loved you. And I don't know what happened there, but

593
00:33:06.759 --> 00:33:08.880
<v Speaker 1>and what were you? What was your highlight moment from

594
00:33:09.000 --> 00:33:10.359
<v Speaker 1>the second spot.

595
00:33:11.039 --> 00:33:14.400
<v Speaker 2>So I think the first approach it went for I

596
00:33:14.440 --> 00:33:16.440
<v Speaker 2>think I talked to the ladies for a good twenty

597
00:33:16.480 --> 00:33:19.799
<v Speaker 2>to thirty minutes. That was That was really fun. I

598
00:33:19.839 --> 00:33:22.200
<v Speaker 2>remember it was probably a group of three or four people,

599
00:33:23.119 --> 00:33:26.920
<v Speaker 2>and I remember I think it was you, just myself

600
00:33:27.000 --> 00:33:30.799
<v Speaker 2>and a couple of other guys, and I was telling

601
00:33:30.839 --> 00:33:32.720
<v Speaker 2>you that, yeah, I'm kind of like scanning through an

602
00:33:32.839 --> 00:33:35.359
<v Speaker 2>entire bar, like whom to approach next? And You're like,

603
00:33:35.400 --> 00:33:37.319
<v Speaker 2>why did you start with them? And I was like,

604
00:33:37.319 --> 00:33:40.440
<v Speaker 2>you know what, I will nice. I used the same

605
00:33:40.599 --> 00:33:43.119
<v Speaker 2>opening line again, high ladies, I don't want to waste

606
00:33:43.119 --> 00:33:45.559
<v Speaker 2>your time. I don't know if I should have said that,

607
00:33:45.559 --> 00:33:48.640
<v Speaker 2>but I did just wantally let you know and right

608
00:33:48.680 --> 00:33:50.720
<v Speaker 2>to the point. And I still one to ten, what

609
00:33:50.759 --> 00:33:54.160
<v Speaker 2>do you think of my outfit? And I remember all

610
00:33:54.279 --> 00:33:57.559
<v Speaker 2>three or four of them walking on me and they

611
00:33:57.599 --> 00:34:01.160
<v Speaker 2>were like scanning top to bottom. And the girl that

612
00:34:01.279 --> 00:34:02.039
<v Speaker 2>I really liked.

613
00:34:02.160 --> 00:34:02.759
<v Speaker 1>Was in the middle.

614
00:34:02.799 --> 00:34:04.599
<v Speaker 2>She was like, why didn't you give us a spin,

615
00:34:05.039 --> 00:34:08.239
<v Speaker 2>and I remember lending my hand to her and I'm like,

616
00:34:08.280 --> 00:34:11.719
<v Speaker 2>why don't you spin yourself? Spin me yourself? And she

617
00:34:11.920 --> 00:34:15.639
<v Speaker 2>like spinned me three sixty. She was like I could

618
00:34:15.679 --> 00:34:18.960
<v Speaker 2>tell her body language or like all the girls there,

619
00:34:19.039 --> 00:34:23.519
<v Speaker 2>they were finding extremely funny. And I remember she gave

620
00:34:23.559 --> 00:34:26.039
<v Speaker 2>me some really good compliments. She also told me I

621
00:34:26.079 --> 00:34:27.840
<v Speaker 2>think it was another like a seven, seven and a

622
00:34:27.880 --> 00:34:31.000
<v Speaker 2>half out of ten. I was asking her, why what

623
00:34:31.159 --> 00:34:33.880
<v Speaker 2>am I? What did I do wrong? How can I improve?

624
00:34:34.039 --> 00:34:36.280
<v Speaker 2>And she was giving me some real good advice, actually,

625
00:34:36.639 --> 00:34:39.320
<v Speaker 2>some advices that I still followed to the state.

626
00:34:40.679 --> 00:34:44.360
<v Speaker 1>Amazing. Think about the guy you described earlier, the guy

627
00:34:44.400 --> 00:34:49.320
<v Speaker 1>who couldn't even give a love note to the grocery

628
00:34:49.360 --> 00:34:53.360
<v Speaker 1>store the cute grocery store cashier is at two venues

629
00:34:53.480 --> 00:34:56.360
<v Speaker 1>grabbing what five six phone numbers that night? Amazing?

630
00:34:56.960 --> 00:34:59.800
<v Speaker 2>I think around that six or seven is sh.

631
00:35:00.159 --> 00:35:06.760
<v Speaker 1>Or seven phone numbers from cold approaching And how many

632
00:35:06.880 --> 00:35:11.280
<v Speaker 1>did you get any mean rejections the whole night or

633
00:35:11.320 --> 00:35:13.119
<v Speaker 1>likes get away?

634
00:35:13.360 --> 00:35:14.800
<v Speaker 2>No? Not really.

635
00:35:15.719 --> 00:35:19.159
<v Speaker 1>So you went from being that in your head guy

636
00:35:19.159 --> 00:35:22.000
<v Speaker 1>who wouldn't even give that love note to the cashier

637
00:35:22.719 --> 00:35:24.920
<v Speaker 1>to the guy who was grabbing six or seven phone

638
00:35:25.000 --> 00:35:28.119
<v Speaker 1>numbers and just totally in the zone. If you could go,

639
00:35:28.199 --> 00:35:30.639
<v Speaker 1>if you could give a piece of advice to the

640
00:35:30.639 --> 00:35:33.360
<v Speaker 1>guy watching and listen or listening to this and say,

641
00:35:33.440 --> 00:35:36.719
<v Speaker 1>here's what you need to do or say to have

642
00:35:36.960 --> 00:35:39.920
<v Speaker 1>his breakthrough night out approaching What advice would you give

643
00:35:39.960 --> 00:35:43.119
<v Speaker 1>based on what you experienced that night and beyond.

644
00:35:43.440 --> 00:35:46.239
<v Speaker 2>The first thing I would recommend is to be comfortable

645
00:35:46.320 --> 00:35:51.559
<v Speaker 2>in their own skin. Anyone who is going to ask

646
00:35:51.639 --> 00:35:56.920
<v Speaker 2>out any girl you know you can cut that part.

647
00:35:57.000 --> 00:36:01.400
<v Speaker 2>I don't know what else? What do you again? So

648
00:36:02.039 --> 00:36:04.519
<v Speaker 2>great question, and the way I'm going to answer this

649
00:36:04.800 --> 00:36:08.400
<v Speaker 2>is this in my priority list, the number one thing

650
00:36:08.639 --> 00:36:11.920
<v Speaker 2>is going to be self confidence oka and being comfortable

651
00:36:11.960 --> 00:36:16.239
<v Speaker 2>in your own skin, because if you're not as self

652
00:36:16.719 --> 00:36:19.239
<v Speaker 2>if you're not that confident in your own skin somewhere,

653
00:36:19.239 --> 00:36:22.199
<v Speaker 2>you're going to feel that you're not deserving. And if

654
00:36:22.239 --> 00:36:24.760
<v Speaker 2>you're not, if you don't feel that you're deserving, you're

655
00:36:24.800 --> 00:36:28.360
<v Speaker 2>never going to go and ask that girl out right somewhere.

656
00:36:28.480 --> 00:36:32.440
<v Speaker 2>You have to think of yourself highly, and you have

657
00:36:32.519 --> 00:36:34.840
<v Speaker 2>to think yourself in the sense that you have a

658
00:36:34.840 --> 00:36:37.039
<v Speaker 2>lot of value chadded to this world. You have a

659
00:36:37.079 --> 00:36:40.280
<v Speaker 2>lot of value to add to the person you're going

660
00:36:40.320 --> 00:36:41.400
<v Speaker 2>to approach to their.

661
00:36:41.239 --> 00:36:46.800
<v Speaker 1>Life exactly, and how do we do that? Every guy's

662
00:36:46.800 --> 00:36:49.480
<v Speaker 1>got to find his own way. But I suggest to

663
00:36:49.559 --> 00:36:53.599
<v Speaker 1>the listener, when you go out, tell yourself three things

664
00:36:53.639 --> 00:36:55.960
<v Speaker 1>about yourself that you know makes you a really great catch,

665
00:36:56.199 --> 00:36:59.280
<v Speaker 1>whatever it is, and make them specific. You know, in

666
00:36:59.320 --> 00:37:02.719
<v Speaker 1>your case, it might be I have a good job,

667
00:37:03.840 --> 00:37:08.400
<v Speaker 1>I'm really good style, and you're a great personal great

668
00:37:08.400 --> 00:37:11.519
<v Speaker 1>sense of humor, great, great personality, whatever it is. It

669
00:37:11.559 --> 00:37:13.679
<v Speaker 1>gives you a little bit of oomph because what this

670
00:37:13.800 --> 00:37:16.400
<v Speaker 1>does is this takes your brain away from all that

671
00:37:16.760 --> 00:37:19.320
<v Speaker 1>why am I not as good looking as him? You're

672
00:37:19.400 --> 00:37:21.960
<v Speaker 1>just going to drag your confidence down. It makes you say, hey,

673
00:37:21.960 --> 00:37:25.039
<v Speaker 1>what do I know? I offer? Bottom line is women

674
00:37:25.079 --> 00:37:27.480
<v Speaker 1>aren't looking at you and saying why aren't you as

675
00:37:27.480 --> 00:37:30.639
<v Speaker 1>good looking as that guy over there? Yeah, women are

676
00:37:30.719 --> 00:37:32.719
<v Speaker 1>looking at you saying, okay, do you believe in yourself

677
00:37:32.800 --> 00:37:36.039
<v Speaker 1>or not? And that's pretty much all they're waiting for.

678
00:37:36.599 --> 00:37:37.519
<v Speaker 1>Makes sense to.

679
00:37:37.480 --> 00:37:39.679
<v Speaker 2>That point, it kind of reminded me of one other

680
00:37:39.760 --> 00:37:42.880
<v Speaker 2>story that happened in that same approach. Okay, so as

681
00:37:42.920 --> 00:37:45.880
<v Speaker 2>I was talking to all the girls, I think one

682
00:37:45.920 --> 00:37:49.480
<v Speaker 2>of our your friends also try to join us. And

683
00:37:49.559 --> 00:37:53.480
<v Speaker 2>I forgot the gentleman's name, but I remember this tall guy,

684
00:37:53.719 --> 00:37:57.320
<v Speaker 2>blue eyes, really good hair, and I was like, there

685
00:37:57.400 --> 00:37:59.280
<v Speaker 2>goes my chance. Now all the girls are going to

686
00:37:59.320 --> 00:38:02.159
<v Speaker 2>talk to him, they're going to forget about me. He

687
00:38:02.360 --> 00:38:04.760
<v Speaker 2>comes into the picture with the girl that I was

688
00:38:04.800 --> 00:38:07.920
<v Speaker 2>interested in. She just looked at him once and then

689
00:38:07.960 --> 00:38:11.519
<v Speaker 2>she still maintained eye contact with me. She just didn't care.

690
00:38:11.559 --> 00:38:15.480
<v Speaker 2>She was so fascinated by me and the questions I

691
00:38:15.599 --> 00:38:19.320
<v Speaker 2>was asking and my wit. So just for anyone who's

692
00:38:19.360 --> 00:38:21.599
<v Speaker 2>thinking if they're not good looking, they're not enough, I mean,

693
00:38:21.639 --> 00:38:22.599
<v Speaker 2>this is a great example.

694
00:38:22.840 --> 00:38:27.159
<v Speaker 1>That's a great moment of looks overrated. Nice to have.

695
00:38:27.199 --> 00:38:29.719
<v Speaker 1>If you're good looking, that's great. Good on you. But

696
00:38:29.800 --> 00:38:32.440
<v Speaker 1>you don't have to look like Brad Pitt. You know,

697
00:38:32.559 --> 00:38:36.960
<v Speaker 1>if you look like Brad Garrett, you can still get

698
00:38:37.000 --> 00:38:39.360
<v Speaker 1>somewhere as long as you believe in yourself. Here's why

699
00:38:39.679 --> 00:38:44.760
<v Speaker 1>every beautiful attractive woman has beautiful attractive male friends. Gay

700
00:38:44.880 --> 00:38:49.000
<v Speaker 1>friends often, and these women aren't necessarily attracted to good looks.

701
00:38:49.519 --> 00:38:54.719
<v Speaker 1>They're attracted to our presence, our personality, our ability to play, flirt,

702
00:38:54.880 --> 00:38:58.039
<v Speaker 1>have fun with them, and more than anything, that core

703
00:38:58.159 --> 00:39:00.880
<v Speaker 1>sense of your worth, that core confidence that comes from

704
00:39:01.360 --> 00:39:05.519
<v Speaker 1>understanding your authentic value. So take it from a middle

705
00:39:05.519 --> 00:39:08.719
<v Speaker 1>aged man who's you know, I look like the lead

706
00:39:08.719 --> 00:39:11.119
<v Speaker 1>singer from Weezer. I don't look like some male model.

707
00:39:11.440 --> 00:39:13.280
<v Speaker 1>And back when I was single, I dated the most

708
00:39:13.320 --> 00:39:16.320
<v Speaker 1>incredible women. They weren't hooking up with me because of

709
00:39:16.360 --> 00:39:21.159
<v Speaker 1>my one pack abs. They liked my personality, they liked

710
00:39:21.199 --> 00:39:23.320
<v Speaker 1>who I was, And the same goes for you. So yeah,

711
00:39:23.519 --> 00:39:26.760
<v Speaker 1>good looks overrated can only.

712
00:39:26.599 --> 00:39:27.119
<v Speaker 2>Go so far.

713
00:39:27.920 --> 00:39:31.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah that's nice if you have it, but overrated? Are

714
00:39:31.400 --> 00:39:33.760
<v Speaker 1>there any look? I know you're in a relationship. Now,

715
00:39:34.079 --> 00:39:35.960
<v Speaker 1>can you share how you met your girlfriend? Did you

716
00:39:35.960 --> 00:39:38.000
<v Speaker 1>meet her out in the real world? Was it an approach,

717
00:39:38.639 --> 00:39:40.679
<v Speaker 1>was it a social circle? How did you connect with

718
00:39:40.719 --> 00:39:41.639
<v Speaker 1>your now girlfriend?

719
00:39:42.519 --> 00:39:45.960
<v Speaker 2>So I'm glad you bring that up. And yeah, it's

720
00:39:45.960 --> 00:39:50.480
<v Speaker 2>a pretty beautiful story. And she's she's she's amazing. And

721
00:39:50.599 --> 00:39:54.599
<v Speaker 2>I met her through a friend. Basically, I have this

722
00:39:54.840 --> 00:39:57.000
<v Speaker 2>group of friends that we're going to go for like

723
00:39:57.079 --> 00:40:02.960
<v Speaker 2>a random dinner one night, and she's basically a friend's friend,

724
00:40:03.199 --> 00:40:05.840
<v Speaker 2>and she happened to come out the same night as well.

725
00:40:06.800 --> 00:40:11.039
<v Speaker 2>And I remember, I think the first time we met,

726
00:40:11.320 --> 00:40:13.960
<v Speaker 2>she was a bit intimidated by me. That's what she

727
00:40:14.039 --> 00:40:17.719
<v Speaker 2>tells me. And it has more to do with According

728
00:40:17.719 --> 00:40:20.880
<v Speaker 2>to her, I was so confident and I was there

729
00:40:21.039 --> 00:40:27.400
<v Speaker 2>dictating the entire conversation, and she said, this is what

730
00:40:27.440 --> 00:40:29.639
<v Speaker 2>she tells me now. But back then she would tell

731
00:40:29.719 --> 00:40:31.960
<v Speaker 2>me like she was really intimidated by me, this and that.

732
00:40:32.400 --> 00:40:34.400
<v Speaker 2>But now she tells me that she actually had a

733
00:40:34.440 --> 00:40:38.360
<v Speaker 2>crush on me, But she wasn't willing to tell me

734
00:40:38.400 --> 00:40:42.559
<v Speaker 2>at that time that she did. And that's something I've

735
00:40:42.599 --> 00:40:45.519
<v Speaker 2>noticed with a lot of girls. They wouldn't they. They

736
00:40:45.679 --> 00:40:47.480
<v Speaker 2>wouldn't want to tell you straight up that they have

737
00:40:47.519 --> 00:40:50.159
<v Speaker 2>a crush on you. They have their own way off

738
00:40:50.320 --> 00:40:54.280
<v Speaker 2>delivering letting you know at some point.

739
00:40:54.800 --> 00:40:56.119
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, they're more subtle, aren't they.

740
00:40:57.880 --> 00:40:58.039
<v Speaker 2>Yeah.

741
00:40:58.119 --> 00:41:01.440
<v Speaker 1>Women like to communicate, and more so always drop hints.

742
00:41:02.159 --> 00:41:06.639
<v Speaker 1>Most women aren't very direct. Some are, but not too many, true,

743
00:41:06.800 --> 00:41:11.880
<v Speaker 1>not too many. And so for the guy who is thinking, Okay,

744
00:41:12.079 --> 00:41:14.320
<v Speaker 1>I want to go out and I want to get

745
00:41:14.599 --> 00:41:17.679
<v Speaker 1>a couple of phone numbers, maybe five or six or seven,

746
00:41:17.760 --> 00:41:20.039
<v Speaker 1>but at least one or two. For a guy who

747
00:41:20.119 --> 00:41:24.960
<v Speaker 1>wants to approach but he's afraid, or here's the thing

748
00:41:25.000 --> 00:41:26.960
<v Speaker 1>I hear more than anything else Robbie, I don't know

749
00:41:26.960 --> 00:41:29.039
<v Speaker 1>what to say. What do I say to that woman?

750
00:41:30.119 --> 00:41:31.800
<v Speaker 1>What is your answer? What is your advice for the

751
00:41:31.880 --> 00:41:34.920
<v Speaker 1>guy who is like, help us, Robbie? What do I say?

752
00:41:35.599 --> 00:41:38.599
<v Speaker 2>That's that's a good one, and I this is just

753
00:41:38.719 --> 00:41:42.679
<v Speaker 2>my opinion, and that is just try not to sound

754
00:41:42.840 --> 00:41:47.360
<v Speaker 2>too artificial for lack of better words. Try to be

755
00:41:47.440 --> 00:41:51.480
<v Speaker 2>authentic and try to like use a topic that you

756
00:41:51.519 --> 00:41:56.559
<v Speaker 2>can talk on for minutes or hours. For me, I

757
00:41:56.639 --> 00:42:01.480
<v Speaker 2>love fashion, I love nice clues. So that's why when

758
00:42:01.519 --> 00:42:04.360
<v Speaker 2>I said or used the line what do you think

759
00:42:04.400 --> 00:42:06.239
<v Speaker 2>of my outfit? On a scle of one to ten,

760
00:42:06.760 --> 00:42:09.559
<v Speaker 2>I knew exactly what I was talking about. I knew

761
00:42:09.920 --> 00:42:13.519
<v Speaker 2>my stuff, and depending on whatever respond stay what have

762
00:42:14.119 --> 00:42:17.239
<v Speaker 2>I always knew a follow up question or things to

763
00:42:17.320 --> 00:42:21.280
<v Speaker 2>add to it. So being authentic and probably picking a

764
00:42:21.320 --> 00:42:24.400
<v Speaker 2>topic you'll love to talk about, I think it's probably

765
00:42:24.440 --> 00:42:27.199
<v Speaker 2>one of the ways to go. But at the same time,

766
00:42:27.400 --> 00:42:30.719
<v Speaker 2>you get to understand that not everyone's gonna vibe with

767
00:42:30.800 --> 00:42:33.519
<v Speaker 2>you or vibe with the things that you love all

768
00:42:33.519 --> 00:42:36.719
<v Speaker 2>the time. And that's that's how it is. We are

769
00:42:36.800 --> 00:42:41.760
<v Speaker 2>all individuals, all have our unique abilities or unique likings

770
00:42:41.800 --> 00:42:46.639
<v Speaker 2>and everything. And if you approach ten girls, probably five

771
00:42:46.800 --> 00:42:48.679
<v Speaker 2>with five of them we're not even going to vibe with.

772
00:42:48.760 --> 00:42:52.679
<v Speaker 2>And it's fine, just you're and I think it's it's

773
00:42:52.719 --> 00:42:56.000
<v Speaker 2>for the better. If you're not vibing with the person,

774
00:42:56.159 --> 00:42:58.119
<v Speaker 2>might be with the person, be with someone that you

775
00:42:59.000 --> 00:43:00.320
<v Speaker 2>have shared interests, swip.

776
00:43:01.679 --> 00:43:05.079
<v Speaker 1>Absolutely, you're not supposed to attract all of them. It's

777
00:43:05.159 --> 00:43:10.679
<v Speaker 1>cold approaching. It's it's like baseball. The best Major league

778
00:43:10.679 --> 00:43:14.679
<v Speaker 1>players in the world fail to get a base hit

779
00:43:14.760 --> 00:43:17.440
<v Speaker 1>seven out of ten times, if they'd get there three

780
00:43:17.440 --> 00:43:19.239
<v Speaker 1>out of ten times, and they do that for twenty

781
00:43:19.519 --> 00:43:22.320
<v Speaker 1>straight years, run the Hall of Fame. They're supposed to

782
00:43:22.320 --> 00:43:25.480
<v Speaker 1>fail seventy percent of the time. And with approaching, that's

783
00:43:25.599 --> 00:43:28.960
<v Speaker 1>actually a pretty close to good batting average once you get,

784
00:43:29.559 --> 00:43:32.519
<v Speaker 1>once you get in the zone, Like that night on

785
00:43:32.559 --> 00:43:35.119
<v Speaker 1>that Fearless Friday, you got six or seven numbers. Do

786
00:43:35.199 --> 00:43:37.039
<v Speaker 1>you remember about how many women you talked to?

787
00:43:38.840 --> 00:43:42.920
<v Speaker 2>I remember it was around the around twenty five ish

788
00:43:43.079 --> 00:43:43.519
<v Speaker 2>or something.

789
00:43:43.840 --> 00:43:44.960
<v Speaker 1>Okay, yeah, there you go.

790
00:43:45.039 --> 00:43:47.400
<v Speaker 2>And I think I was lucky enough to get dab

791
00:43:47.440 --> 00:43:50.000
<v Speaker 2>many numbers, because I would have been happy even if

792
00:43:50.039 --> 00:43:52.079
<v Speaker 2>I got a couple of numbers out of the twenty five.

793
00:43:53.039 --> 00:43:55.679
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, So yeah, six or seven out of twenty five,

794
00:43:55.800 --> 00:43:57.800
<v Speaker 1>So I'm bad at math. But you know what, one

795
00:43:57.840 --> 00:43:59.159
<v Speaker 1>in one and.

796
00:43:59.079 --> 00:44:01.760
<v Speaker 2>Three four, then yeah, it's kind of like three percent

797
00:44:01.880 --> 00:44:02.760
<v Speaker 2>or something. Yeah.

798
00:44:02.840 --> 00:44:05.159
<v Speaker 1>I talk about this in my book The Rule of

799
00:44:05.159 --> 00:44:07.920
<v Speaker 1>one and four. My old coaches called the rule of

800
00:44:07.960 --> 00:44:09.760
<v Speaker 1>one and three. I think one in four is closer

801
00:44:09.800 --> 00:44:12.920
<v Speaker 1>to accurate. One in four. When you are approaching, you

802
00:44:13.000 --> 00:44:15.159
<v Speaker 1>get into a good zone and you're being really genuine,

803
00:44:15.199 --> 00:44:17.159
<v Speaker 1>and you know how to flirt, know what to say

804
00:44:17.199 --> 00:44:19.880
<v Speaker 1>within reason, but you just are in touch with that

805
00:44:19.920 --> 00:44:23.079
<v Speaker 1>core worth. At a place like a bar, about one

806
00:44:23.119 --> 00:44:26.599
<v Speaker 1>in four women will be pretty darn attracted to you,

807
00:44:27.639 --> 00:44:30.800
<v Speaker 1>and that gives you permission to not have three out

808
00:44:30.840 --> 00:44:33.559
<v Speaker 1>of four be into you. You're allowed to not have

809
00:44:33.679 --> 00:44:36.760
<v Speaker 1>them into you. We almost want to be so polarizingly,

810
00:44:36.800 --> 00:44:41.000
<v Speaker 1>authentically raw and real that we're super attractive to women

811
00:44:41.000 --> 00:44:44.960
<v Speaker 1>who like Connell's type, Robbie's type, and then women who don't.

812
00:44:45.000 --> 00:44:48.039
<v Speaker 1>That's cool. It only takes one to change your life

813
00:44:48.039 --> 00:44:49.719
<v Speaker 1>as your girlfriend. It only takes a couple of phone

814
00:44:49.760 --> 00:44:51.760
<v Speaker 1>numbers to get into a really good zone.

815
00:44:51.960 --> 00:44:55.760
<v Speaker 2>Exactly the other thing. Oh sorry, go ahead, bro, Yeah,

816
00:44:55.840 --> 00:44:57.719
<v Speaker 2>I was going to say that as long as you're

817
00:44:57.760 --> 00:45:01.320
<v Speaker 2>putting in the reps you're eventually are going to get someone.

818
00:45:01.840 --> 00:45:04.360
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. Yeah, you put in reps long before that night

819
00:45:04.400 --> 00:45:08.360
<v Speaker 1>that were paid off that night exactly planted seeds that sprouted,

820
00:45:09.400 --> 00:45:11.719
<v Speaker 1>and the other thing you did that night. I didn't

821
00:45:11.719 --> 00:45:14.000
<v Speaker 1>even realize it until this conversation, but it sounds like

822
00:45:14.039 --> 00:45:16.719
<v Speaker 1>you had like that back pocket opener you were using, right,

823
00:45:17.559 --> 00:45:20.800
<v Speaker 1>the style one, and that came out of an organic

824
00:45:22.840 --> 00:45:24.880
<v Speaker 1>expression of what you were what was on your mind

825
00:45:24.880 --> 00:45:27.000
<v Speaker 1>that day. Right, you were getting new clothes with my

826
00:45:27.079 --> 00:45:30.480
<v Speaker 1>stylist Rihanne. You were looking good or wanting to know

827
00:45:30.519 --> 00:45:31.719
<v Speaker 1>what women thought of your new outfit.

828
00:45:31.800 --> 00:45:34.199
<v Speaker 2>Right. I think one of the things that helped me

829
00:45:34.599 --> 00:45:40.480
<v Speaker 2>was Rhann. She was really like complimenting my clothes that

830
00:45:40.800 --> 00:45:42.760
<v Speaker 2>I would like to think she really liked my passion

831
00:45:42.800 --> 00:45:46.519
<v Speaker 2>and someone that that really helped me out in terms

832
00:45:46.559 --> 00:45:49.840
<v Speaker 2>of with my confidence. And this is what I've realized,

833
00:45:50.039 --> 00:45:52.760
<v Speaker 2>if you can start off your day with just like

834
00:45:52.840 --> 00:45:56.800
<v Speaker 2>one or two good compliments, it really sets up your

835
00:45:56.840 --> 00:45:58.880
<v Speaker 2>day in a good way. Right, So that that's what

836
00:45:58.920 --> 00:46:03.159
<v Speaker 2>it kind of did for me. And I remember after

837
00:46:03.199 --> 00:46:07.480
<v Speaker 2>the first couple approaches when it went wrong, I was like, Okay,

838
00:46:07.519 --> 00:46:09.599
<v Speaker 2>what is The one thing that happened to me was good.

839
00:46:09.840 --> 00:46:12.039
<v Speaker 2>And I was thinking back to the time when Ryan

840
00:46:12.119 --> 00:46:15.239
<v Speaker 2>and she was giving me compliments about my clothing, and

841
00:46:15.320 --> 00:46:17.039
<v Speaker 2>I was like, you know what, let me make something

842
00:46:17.079 --> 00:46:19.239
<v Speaker 2>out of that and use that as my opening line.

843
00:46:20.280 --> 00:46:23.599
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I love it. I like how you were using

844
00:46:23.679 --> 00:46:25.800
<v Speaker 1>what was in the ether. It was it was just

845
00:46:26.159 --> 00:46:28.960
<v Speaker 1>on your mind. And a lot of guys think, oh,

846
00:46:29.000 --> 00:46:31.119
<v Speaker 1>I need to say the right thing, I need to

847
00:46:31.159 --> 00:46:33.079
<v Speaker 1>say the perfect thing. Well, why don't you just share

848
00:46:33.199 --> 00:46:35.440
<v Speaker 1>something that's on your mind right then and there, which is, Hey, ladies,

849
00:46:35.480 --> 00:46:37.280
<v Speaker 1>what do you think of my new outfit scale of

850
00:46:37.280 --> 00:46:39.639
<v Speaker 1>one to ten? Oh my god, you could do that

851
00:46:39.960 --> 00:46:42.159
<v Speaker 1>all night long. And I like that you had a

852
00:46:42.199 --> 00:46:47.079
<v Speaker 1>back pocket opener, And that's another thing that helps. If

853
00:46:47.119 --> 00:46:51.079
<v Speaker 1>you have a like break glass for approach opener in

854
00:46:51.119 --> 00:46:53.800
<v Speaker 1>your back pocket, you'll have that to lean on if

855
00:46:53.800 --> 00:46:56.320
<v Speaker 1>you need it. But then you probably won't even need

856
00:46:56.360 --> 00:46:59.519
<v Speaker 1>it that much because you have it, so you can

857
00:46:59.559 --> 00:47:01.760
<v Speaker 1>just be in the present moment. You know, women don't

858
00:47:01.760 --> 00:47:04.760
<v Speaker 1>want to be approached by a robotic guy. Hey, ladies,

859
00:47:05.599 --> 00:47:09.159
<v Speaker 1>have you ever walked up to a man? You know,

860
00:47:10.480 --> 00:47:13.079
<v Speaker 1>that's just that gets in the way. I was at

861
00:47:13.079 --> 00:47:15.039
<v Speaker 1>the same venue we went to on a different night,

862
00:47:15.400 --> 00:47:18.840
<v Speaker 1>and Jess was with me and I left her to

863
00:47:18.880 --> 00:47:21.679
<v Speaker 1>go work with another client, and this guy approached Jess

864
00:47:22.440 --> 00:47:27.199
<v Speaker 1>very very pretty blonde girlfriend, and he came up and said, Hey,

865
00:47:27.360 --> 00:47:30.480
<v Speaker 1>I'm I'm on a pirate treasure hunt. Will you help

866
00:47:30.559 --> 00:47:34.320
<v Speaker 1>me find my lost treasure? And it was just like

867
00:47:34.800 --> 00:47:38.239
<v Speaker 1>clearly something he had read on a credit for him

868
00:47:38.480 --> 00:47:40.320
<v Speaker 1>or somebody told him to say. And she looked at

869
00:47:40.400 --> 00:47:44.480
<v Speaker 1>him and said, oh, sweetie, here's my boyfriend's business card.

870
00:47:45.920 --> 00:47:47.199
<v Speaker 2>I mean she is bad as.

871
00:47:49.760 --> 00:47:54.239
<v Speaker 1>She's an amazing wing woman. Okay, so you have gone

872
00:47:54.280 --> 00:47:58.199
<v Speaker 1>from Robbie the guy who could not give the cashier

873
00:47:59.360 --> 00:48:02.480
<v Speaker 1>a little I like you note, to the guy who's

874
00:48:02.480 --> 00:48:05.719
<v Speaker 1>grabbing six seven phone numbers at a couple of different venues,

875
00:48:05.840 --> 00:48:10.719
<v Speaker 1>the lord of the club. What is your parting dating

876
00:48:10.800 --> 00:48:14.199
<v Speaker 1>advice that the guy watching or listening to this, What

877
00:48:14.400 --> 00:48:17.239
<v Speaker 1>should he go out and do in the next week

878
00:48:17.440 --> 00:48:20.599
<v Speaker 1>to get him on the path to approaching success?

879
00:48:21.320 --> 00:48:24.480
<v Speaker 2>Great question, And now I'd have to go back to

880
00:48:24.480 --> 00:48:27.360
<v Speaker 2>one of the same points that I mentioned, back to

881
00:48:27.679 --> 00:48:33.280
<v Speaker 2>self imaging in confidence again. Once that is in place,

882
00:48:33.559 --> 00:48:35.599
<v Speaker 2>I'm kind of think what else can of person to

883
00:48:36.320 --> 00:48:39.159
<v Speaker 2>I would say. Fashion can also be a great point

884
00:48:39.440 --> 00:48:45.760
<v Speaker 2>if you're well put together, no one. I mean, let

885
00:48:45.800 --> 00:48:47.880
<v Speaker 2>me put it this way. If let's say you're not

886
00:48:48.119 --> 00:48:51.239
<v Speaker 2>well put together, there's a high chance girls wouldn't want

887
00:48:51.280 --> 00:48:53.960
<v Speaker 2>to talk to you, versus if you are. Even if

888
00:48:54.000 --> 00:48:57.559
<v Speaker 2>you're not the best looking, you still look presentable and

889
00:48:57.639 --> 00:48:58.480
<v Speaker 2>girls love that.

890
00:48:59.199 --> 00:49:04.400
<v Speaker 1>Right, there's a pull I mentioned in my book. Women

891
00:49:04.400 --> 00:49:09.239
<v Speaker 1>were asked what are the five most attractive traits in

892
00:49:09.320 --> 00:49:11.840
<v Speaker 1>a man who you meet for the first time in

893
00:49:11.840 --> 00:49:15.960
<v Speaker 1>a dating context and looks good looking? Was not in

894
00:49:16.000 --> 00:49:19.239
<v Speaker 1>the top five. Number two was looking good meaning style.

895
00:49:20.079 --> 00:49:22.559
<v Speaker 1>I think that was a men's health survey of women.

896
00:49:23.039 --> 00:49:26.360
<v Speaker 1>Second most important thing women notices is this guy's style

897
00:49:26.719 --> 00:49:31.000
<v Speaker 1>relatively well put together, you know, hair, grooming, clothes. So

898
00:49:31.039 --> 00:49:33.239
<v Speaker 1>that's partially probably why you got into such a good

899
00:49:33.320 --> 00:49:35.239
<v Speaker 1>zone that night. As you look to it, you saw

900
00:49:35.280 --> 00:49:39.559
<v Speaker 1>women respond to it. And yeah, try not to dress

901
00:49:39.719 --> 00:49:44.440
<v Speaker 1>like you know, don't walk around vaping in sweatpants and

902
00:49:44.480 --> 00:49:46.679
<v Speaker 1>flip flops. That's not going to help you. That's a

903
00:49:46.719 --> 00:49:47.719
<v Speaker 1>little too authentic.

904
00:49:50.159 --> 00:49:53.159
<v Speaker 2>And I wasn't in any fancy clothes or shoots for something.

905
00:49:53.199 --> 00:49:55.519
<v Speaker 2>I think I had like a pretty basic black top

906
00:49:55.800 --> 00:49:59.159
<v Speaker 2>sports and I'm like, sneatz, that's it, and I was

907
00:49:59.199 --> 00:50:02.239
<v Speaker 2>still getting I think none of the girls gave me

908
00:50:02.280 --> 00:50:05.119
<v Speaker 2>a rating less than seven out of ten that night. Okay,

909
00:50:05.239 --> 00:50:07.159
<v Speaker 2>so it's like you don't have to like and.

910
00:50:07.119 --> 00:50:09.840
<v Speaker 1>Women will be blunt. Women will tell you if you're like,

911
00:50:09.920 --> 00:50:10.719
<v Speaker 1>ah four.

912
00:50:12.400 --> 00:50:16.039
<v Speaker 2>I remember. I think the last approach I did pray left.

913
00:50:16.559 --> 00:50:19.039
<v Speaker 2>I don't think, I mean, I don't think they were

914
00:50:19.119 --> 00:50:21.079
<v Speaker 2>necessarily being rude to me, but I think like some

915
00:50:21.159 --> 00:50:23.679
<v Speaker 2>of them were like jokingly making fun of me. Yea,

916
00:50:24.079 --> 00:50:25.760
<v Speaker 2>I would give you a two, and then like they

917
00:50:25.840 --> 00:50:29.400
<v Speaker 2>just left, like they had a smile on their face

918
00:50:29.440 --> 00:50:31.920
<v Speaker 2>and they were just like trying to be witty with

919
00:50:31.960 --> 00:50:35.480
<v Speaker 2>me or something from what I remember, But yeah, that's

920
00:50:35.519 --> 00:50:37.599
<v Speaker 2>something I agree with you. They were blunt. If they

921
00:50:37.599 --> 00:50:39.159
<v Speaker 2>have something in their mind, they're going to let you know.

922
00:50:39.960 --> 00:50:42.880
<v Speaker 1>To me, approaching is such a powerful thing to be

923
00:50:42.920 --> 00:50:45.079
<v Speaker 1>able to do because we live in a world where

924
00:50:45.079 --> 00:50:48.920
<v Speaker 1>everybody's on the apps, everybody's on social media. But when

925
00:50:48.960 --> 00:50:52.239
<v Speaker 1>you can walk up to women and be yourself and say, hey,

926
00:50:52.280 --> 00:50:54.400
<v Speaker 1>what's up. I'm Robbie, I want to meet you. What

927
00:50:54.440 --> 00:50:56.719
<v Speaker 1>do you think of my style? You don't have to

928
00:50:57.119 --> 00:50:58.800
<v Speaker 1>you you don't have to be stuck on the dating apps.

929
00:50:58.880 --> 00:51:01.440
<v Speaker 1>The world becomes your dating app app. You know, you

930
00:51:01.519 --> 00:51:03.960
<v Speaker 1>got six or seven numbers that one Friday night out.

931
00:51:04.239 --> 00:51:05.920
<v Speaker 1>It's hard to get six or seven numbers on a

932
00:51:06.000 --> 00:51:07.960
<v Speaker 1>dating app. You did it just by walking up to women,

933
00:51:08.039 --> 00:51:11.519
<v Speaker 1>and so few men do it. And I think now

934
00:51:11.639 --> 00:51:14.000
<v Speaker 1>is the best time to approach women ever because guys

935
00:51:14.039 --> 00:51:16.159
<v Speaker 1>just don't do it. And that when that woman said

936
00:51:16.199 --> 00:51:18.760
<v Speaker 1>to you, that was really brave. I'm glad you came

937
00:51:18.800 --> 00:51:20.840
<v Speaker 1>up to me. Man, that set a mouthful.

938
00:51:21.039 --> 00:51:24.719
<v Speaker 2>Great And the competition especially is so low compared to

939
00:51:24.880 --> 00:51:27.880
<v Speaker 2>I'm assuming what it was probably twenty years ago now right,

940
00:51:27.960 --> 00:51:31.360
<v Speaker 2>because pretty much every other guy is probably going with

941
00:51:31.519 --> 00:51:33.960
<v Speaker 2>some form off or like a high level of anxiety,

942
00:51:34.079 --> 00:51:37.239
<v Speaker 2>so it's like there's no one approaching at all. So

943
00:51:37.280 --> 00:51:39.079
<v Speaker 2>it's for you. The only thing you need to do

944
00:51:39.199 --> 00:51:40.920
<v Speaker 2>is to just go and talk to the person you

945
00:51:40.960 --> 00:51:41.880
<v Speaker 2>want you want to talk to.

946
00:51:43.079 --> 00:51:47.119
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, I would say the number of single men who

947
00:51:47.159 --> 00:51:52.159
<v Speaker 1>approach women would be at most four or five percent,

948
00:51:53.199 --> 00:51:56.360
<v Speaker 1>even semi regularly. And most of those guys need liquid

949
00:51:56.360 --> 00:52:01.119
<v Speaker 1>courage or some canned pick up line like the looking

950
00:52:01.119 --> 00:52:03.800
<v Speaker 1>I'm a pirate looking for my charger thing the number

951
00:52:03.840 --> 00:52:07.320
<v Speaker 1>of men who walk up vulnerably as their real, authentic

952
00:52:07.360 --> 00:52:11.079
<v Speaker 1>selves and just shoot their shot one percent at most,

953
00:52:11.199 --> 00:52:14.320
<v Speaker 1>So you are in the one percent club. Welcome to

954
00:52:14.360 --> 00:52:19.199
<v Speaker 1>the club. Not that anyway. Thank you so much for

955
00:52:19.320 --> 00:52:22.199
<v Speaker 1>joining me today, Robbie, and thanks for being such an

956
00:52:22.199 --> 00:52:26.320
<v Speaker 1>amazing client. And yeah, by the way, you listening, if

957
00:52:26.360 --> 00:52:29.960
<v Speaker 1>you would like to go out and meet women out

958
00:52:30.000 --> 00:52:32.639
<v Speaker 1>with me and approach or maybe not with me, but

959
00:52:33.000 --> 00:52:34.719
<v Speaker 1>if you're in New York City, we could do it together.

960
00:52:35.039 --> 00:52:37.480
<v Speaker 1>If you want to go out and get five, six,

961
00:52:37.559 --> 00:52:40.440
<v Speaker 1>seven phone numbers in one night, I can't promise that,

962
00:52:40.639 --> 00:52:42.599
<v Speaker 1>but if Robbie can do it, you probably can do

963
00:52:42.639 --> 00:52:45.440
<v Speaker 1>it too. And just go to my website, Dating transformation

964
00:52:45.559 --> 00:52:48.039
<v Speaker 1>dot com. You can book a free consultation to find

965
00:52:48.039 --> 00:52:51.440
<v Speaker 1>out how my coaching works and if I'm the right

966
00:52:51.440 --> 00:52:53.480
<v Speaker 1>coach for you, or if you want to hire a

967
00:52:53.480 --> 00:52:55.840
<v Speaker 1>coach to teach you how to write a creepy little

968
00:52:55.920 --> 00:52:58.840
<v Speaker 1>love note to a Starbucks barista and creep her out,

969
00:52:58.960 --> 00:53:01.760
<v Speaker 1>I can. I can do that for you too for free. Anyway,

970
00:53:01.880 --> 00:53:05.639
<v Speaker 1>go tot dating transformation dot com and Robbie, thanks for

971
00:53:05.719 --> 00:53:08.679
<v Speaker 1>joining us, and thank you for talking to you. Next

972
00:53:08.679 --> 00:53:12.280
<v Speaker 1>time all right, Audio asolutely h