Speaker 1: Episode with two stories. First part, I hope you enjoy
Speaker 1: this story. Partner betrayed my trust because I was unable
Speaker 1: to purchase a three thousand dollars luxury handbag for her.
Speaker 1: So here's my response. That's correct. My significant other cheated
Speaker 1: on me because I couldn't meet her materialistic desires. I
Speaker 1: couldn't buy her a three thousand dollars bag. I twenty
Speaker 1: seven M was in a relationship with a woman I'll
Speaker 1: call her Luna twenty six F. We dated for more
Speaker 1: than two years when one day I found her making
Speaker 1: out in a Mercedes Benz cabriolet. This happened a week
Speaker 1: ago when I went to an office party. A few
Speaker 1: drinks later, my colleague and I went outside to get
Speaker 1: some fresh air and something caught our attention, a shiny
Speaker 1: blue Mercedes Benz cabriolet. It was parked two buildings away
Speaker 1: in front of a hotel. We thought it was just
Speaker 1: parked and no one was in there, so we casually
Speaker 1: went towards it to admire its beauty closely. As we
Speaker 1: moved closer to the car to admire her beauty, we
Speaker 1: noticed some one was in there. The car was shaking weirdly.
Speaker 1: Then we realized that a couple was making out inside it.
Speaker 1: My colleague and I stopped there and burst out in
Speaker 1: laughter that we were about to disturb someone in their
Speaker 1: private moment. We stood there for a smoke, and next
Speaker 1: what I saw gave me chills. A woman came outside
Speaker 1: of that car, fixing her hair while teasing the man
Speaker 1: with her, and they both headed inside the hotel while
Speaker 1: handing over the keys to the valet. That woman was
Speaker 1: my girl friend, Luna, who was making out with the
Speaker 1: guy in the Bends. My amusement turned into agony. My
Speaker 1: colleague knew Luna and was surprised to see her walking
Speaker 1: inside a hotel hand in hand with a man. I
Speaker 1: didn't know that guy. I had never seen him. I
Speaker 1: know I have suddenly jumped into the topic without giving
Speaker 1: any context. I'm a sales executive in an M and C.
Speaker 1: Luna and I were colleagues when I was working as
Speaker 1: a part time cashier at a supermarket. Luna was the
Speaker 1: store assistant. We became friends, but nothing panned out. At
Speaker 1: that time, I was in college and was too busy
Speaker 1: to get into a relationship. Luna also never showed any
Speaker 1: interest in me. Luna dropped out of college to support
Speaker 1: her family. She has been working two jobs since the
Speaker 1: age of nineteen, and I respect her dedication. A year ago,
Speaker 1: I bumped into her at the same supermarket where we
Speaker 1: used to work. She was promoted to floor supervisor. By then.
Speaker 1: We had met after five years, and like old friends,
Speaker 1: we went for a coffee. I asked her if she
Speaker 1: was dating someone, and she said no. She gestured at
Speaker 1: me as if I was asking her out. I was
Speaker 1: single and said I didn't mind taking her out. We
Speaker 1: exchanged our numbers and the following weekend we went for
Speaker 1: a drink. Gradually we started dating and it's been more
Speaker 1: than two years since we have been together. During our relationship,
Speaker 1: I used to suggest she completely college because the absence
Speaker 1: of one was blocking her career from growing. She said
Speaker 1: she could not afford a college education since she had
Speaker 1: to look after her parents. Initially, I sympathized with her
Speaker 1: because she was sacrificing her career to take care of
Speaker 1: her family, but eventually I discovered that she was sending
Speaker 1: only twenty five percent of her income to her parents.
Speaker 1: Besides her job at the supermarket, which was stable and consistent,
Speaker 1: she used to struggle for her evening jobs. She hoped
Speaker 1: from one to another, from being a waitress to a bartender.
Speaker 1: She tried it all. Since she was working two jobs,
Speaker 1: I suggested she quit one job and join the college
Speaker 1: while the salary from one job could take care of
Speaker 1: her needs and her families. She kicked against the idea
Speaker 1: of rejoining the college. She said her income from one
Speaker 1: job was not enough for her to survive. I respected
Speaker 1: her choice and did not push her further. The thing
Speaker 1: is I wanted her to complete her college and settle
Speaker 1: for a stable day job. I was looking forward to
Speaker 1: proposing to her after a few months, and her schedule
Speaker 1: was the biggest hindrance for me to settle down with her.
Speaker 1: I loved her and was serious about her. I tried
Speaker 1: to confront her about my feelings that I wanted to
Speaker 1: marry and settle down with her within a year. Hence,
Speaker 1: I wanted her to sort out her career first. She
Speaker 1: shrugged off by saying that marriage and career are two
Speaker 1: different things. She also wanted to marry me in a
Speaker 1: year or so, but she liked her hustling career. She
Speaker 1: said she could not sign up for a monotonous day job.
Speaker 1: She considered that to be boring. For some reason, her
Speaker 1: job hopping stuff brought a thrill to her life. I
Speaker 1: don't know if that was a red flag or not,
Speaker 1: but I clearly missed reading that signal. Luna didn't believe
Speaker 1: in saving, so she used to spend all her income
Speaker 1: on her lifestyle. Like any other woman, she had a
Speaker 1: keen interest in branded clothes, bags, and sandals. For someone
Speaker 1: who doesn't know Luna's profession or background, they would assume
Speaker 1: her to be of a wealthy background because of the
Speaker 1: way she carried herself. I don't know how people would
Speaker 1: take it, but I never considered it a problem. Initially,
Speaker 1: I did try to advise her to save up, but
Speaker 1: she said she was working so hard, hence she deserved
Speaker 1: to own those stuff. Besides, she was using her own
Speaker 1: money to fulfill her expensive choices. A year ago, she
Speaker 1: asked me if she could move in with me. She
Speaker 1: was living with her friend who was moving out to
Speaker 1: a different city. Luna could not bear the expenses of
Speaker 1: the apartment alone, hence asked me if we could stay together.
Speaker 1: I was happy she was leveling up our relationship because
Speaker 1: I was also serious about her. I told her she
Speaker 1: did need not to contribute since I was already bearing
Speaker 1: the rent and other house bills alone. Instead, she can
Speaker 1: save up that money for herself. I didn't think about
Speaker 1: money a lot. Apart from the food expenses. Nothing shot
Speaker 1: up due to her moving in, so I didn't mind
Speaker 1: bearing it. Six months ago, I got a promotion at work.
Speaker 1: It was a very proud moment for me. I had
Speaker 1: worked really hard for it. To celebrate my achievement, I
Speaker 1: took Luna out for a candlelight dinner at a fancy restaurant.
Speaker 1: She was really happy to enjoy the service at a
Speaker 1: premium place where she was usually at the other end
Speaker 1: service provider as waitress or bartender. She was so pleased
Speaker 1: that she kept telling me I was raising her expectations.
Speaker 1: I wanted her to pamper her like any man does
Speaker 1: for his GF slash wife. Little did I know that
Speaker 1: I was digging my own grave. After that dinner, Luna
Speaker 1: started subtly suggesting that I'd take her out every now
Speaker 1: and then, which basically meant every weekend. Her demand was
Speaker 1: not for a regular subway, mc Donald's, or any regular eatery.
Speaker 1: She suggested a fancier place every weekend. For the past
Speaker 1: few months, I had put up with her, thinking that
Speaker 1: she would soon get over it. While her eating out
Speaker 1: habit didn't subside, a new habit of hers popped up,
Speaker 1: and it was for gifts. She started demanding gifts from me.
Speaker 1: Her request was not for any occasion, but just random
Speaker 1: and that too expensive ones. Sometimes it was for a
Speaker 1: tzar address, the latest iPhones and what not. It was
Speaker 1: her birthday last month and I casually asked her what
Speaker 1: she needed for her birthday gift. Her wishless almost choked me.
Speaker 1: It was a Chanel bag of three thousand dollars. I
Speaker 1: cracked up, taking it to be a joke, but she
Speaker 1: got offended. She said that I was judging her on
Speaker 1: her choice. I told her I wasn't judging her at all,
Speaker 1: but I seriously took it as a joke. Three thousand
Speaker 1: dollars for a bag is seriously something that I cannot
Speaker 1: wrap my head around. Instead of acknowledging her unreasonable demand,
Speaker 1: she justified it. She said that since I got a
Speaker 1: hefty raise after my promotion, I should be treating her
Speaker 1: with something fancy. Besides, I have not gifted her anything
Speaker 1: significant for them the last two years of dating each other.
Speaker 1: I was shocked when she said that I know I
Speaker 1: didn't gift her anything expensive, but I have been bearing
Speaker 1: all the household expenses for the last one year before
Speaker 1: she moved in. I was bearing all the bills for
Speaker 1: lunch and dinner whenever we went out. I deliberately didn't
Speaker 1: let her pay because she was earning less. She didn't
Speaker 1: fight with me over this, but she gaslight the situation
Speaker 1: to the extent that it made me feel guilty for
Speaker 1: not providing her with what she needed. She said that
Speaker 1: three thousand dollars was just a ten day salary for me.
Speaker 1: People spend their entire month's salary on their girlfriend. See.
Speaker 1: I know three K would be a ten day salary,
Speaker 1: but I believe spending that much money on a bag
Speaker 1: is worthless. I know there are a bunch of people
Speaker 1: out there who go crazy over these over the top
Speaker 1: brands fifty K Nike shoes or ten K Gucci belts.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, but I don't find it worth spending a
Speaker 1: dime on such short term clothing items. I told her
Speaker 1: that if she wanted, I could give her that money
Speaker 1: and she would get some vocational skills to help her
Speaker 1: improve on her work. I know I sounded boring, but
Speaker 1: I couldn't think of anything better to spend three thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: She rolled her eyes and called me stingy. She was
Speaker 1: clearly angry with me, but didn't say anything. Her attitude
Speaker 1: had definitely changed after that. I thought she was just
Speaker 1: upset because of the bag episode and would get over it.
Speaker 1: On her birthday Eve, I came home early to plan
Speaker 1: a surprise for her. I took a half day at
Speaker 1: work to buy flowers, candles, cakes, and a couple of
Speaker 1: dresses from Zara, which she had been eyeing for some time.
Speaker 1: I kept waiting for her until midnight. She usually used
Speaker 1: to return by midnight, but after that fight, she was
Speaker 1: coming late. I called her to check when she would return,
Speaker 1: but she didn't answer the call. After an hour or so,
Speaker 1: she messaged me that her colleagues had planned a surprise
Speaker 1: party for her birthday and she be spending the night there.
Speaker 1: I was utterly disappointed because I had also planned for
Speaker 1: the surprise and spent the entire evening preparing for it. However,
Speaker 1: I couldn't blame her because she didn't know about my plan.
Speaker 1: But somehow I didn't like that she spent her birthday
Speaker 1: night with her friends. I mean She could have invited
Speaker 1: me to that party, but she didn't. I was so
Speaker 1: upset and tired that I dozed off on the couch.
Speaker 1: I woke up in the morning when Luna arrived drunk
Speaker 1: from her party. She was happy to see that I
Speaker 1: had also planned something in the house. She cuddled me
Speaker 1: and apologized for ditching me all night. I told her
Speaker 1: that I had taken an off on her birthday so
Speaker 1: that we could enjoy the day together. She didn't really
Speaker 1: like the plan. She said she had to go to
Speaker 1: work as she had not taken a leave. I told
Speaker 1: her to call in sick at work, but she denied it.
Speaker 1: I really got upset at this because I had planned
Speaker 1: so much and was so excited to spend quality time
Speaker 1: with her. She ignored my request and went ahead with
Speaker 1: her schedule of showering, getting dressed up, and leaving for work.
Speaker 1: I couldn't fight with her because it was her birthday,
Speaker 1: so I let her be. I hugged her while she
Speaker 1: was leaving and asked her if she could stay back,
Speaker 1: but she said she was not in for a boring
Speaker 1: day on her birthday. I got confused and asked her
Speaker 1: what she meant. She said that she doesn't want to
Speaker 1: spend her birthday sitting at home and drinking wine. She
Speaker 1: is an outgoing person and would like to spend her
Speaker 1: birthday outside. I suggested that we go out to a
Speaker 1: resort or for a day trip near by. Her response was,
Speaker 1: my work day sounds cooler than your plan. I lost
Speaker 1: my patience by this and let her go. I was
Speaker 1: utterly frustrated by her attitude, but let it pass. I
Speaker 1: took it upon myself that I should have planned something better,
Speaker 1: knowing that Luna was an extrovert party person. Instead of
Speaker 1: just planning something for the two of us, I should
Speaker 1: have planned for a birthday bash or something. The next
Speaker 1: few days, I tried to cheer her up by primer
Speaker 1: promising that on her next birthday, I would really do
Speaker 1: something that would delight her. She said her standard of
Speaker 1: delight is nothing less than a Hawaii trip. I didn't
Speaker 1: say anything, just curled my lips and smiled. For someone
Speaker 1: who has never been outside the state to speak of
Speaker 1: such a standard, it is actually a red flag, and
Speaker 1: this time I read it. I started noticing her closely
Speaker 1: and realized that something was definitely off. While all these
Speaker 1: were going on coincidentally, last week I saw her making
Speaker 1: out in that luxurious car and then entering a five
Speaker 1: star hotel with a man. Seeing them going inside, I
Speaker 1: just couldn't help but rush inside the hotel to follow them.
Speaker 1: My colleague stopped me, saying that I would be thrown
Speaker 1: out of the lobby if I did something shady like this.
Speaker 1: I have to be careful and alert. My colleague requested
Speaker 1: that we go back to our office party, but I
Speaker 1: was not in the mood to go to the party.
Speaker 1: I just stood in front of the hotel waiting for
Speaker 1: them to come out. After a while, my friend and
Speaker 1: insisted that we leave because it could be possible that
Speaker 1: they were spending the night together and we could not
Speaker 1: stand there for the whole night, so he drove me
Speaker 1: back home. I was so distraught that I was not
Speaker 1: able to breathe. I packed all her stuff and dumped
Speaker 1: it outside the apartment. I don't know when did I sleep.
Speaker 1: I woke up to a loud, shrieking voice of Luna
Speaker 1: asking me about her packed stuff. I told her that
Speaker 1: she could go back to her rich boyfriend with whom
Speaker 1: she was effching around last night. Her response was, oh,
Speaker 1: so you know it great. It drove me insane. I
Speaker 1: yelled at her and asked when all these were going on.
Speaker 1: She said that there was no point in being dramatic.
Speaker 1: She had to hunt for these rich men because I
Speaker 1: was a miser and could not afford to buy her
Speaker 1: a Chanel bag. Her eyes were cold and unremorseful. She
Speaker 1: took her stuff and left. It's so shallow and unbelievable
Speaker 1: that people can stoop so low just for the sake
Speaker 1: of money. I don't know what I'm going to do now,
Speaker 1: but surely I won't let that woman walk over me. Update.
Speaker 1: Hi all, it's been more than six months since my
Speaker 1: original post. I didn't make an update earlier because there
Speaker 1: was nothing worth updating. I know. I closed my last
Speaker 1: post saying that I would definitely avenge the cheating, but
Speaker 1: life got the better of me. A few weeks after
Speaker 1: my break up. Coincidentally, I was sent to Seattle for
Speaker 1: a month long project by my company, and that helped
Speaker 1: a lot. The change in scenery helped me move on
Speaker 1: quite fast. After a month, when I was back from
Speaker 1: my work trip, I won't say I had completely forgotten her,
Speaker 1: but yes, I had moved on a lot. I blocked
Speaker 1: her from all social media platforms, so there was no
Speaker 1: way I could see her or know about her. A
Speaker 1: week ago, Luna showed up at my house. She looked miserable.
Speaker 1: I was no longer angry with her, so I let
Speaker 1: her in. I asked her the reason for the visit.
Speaker 1: She broke down, apologizing to me. She said she was
Speaker 1: sorry to ruin our relationship for some short term gifts.
Speaker 1: I asked her to move on because I had come
Speaker 1: ahead from my past. She told me that I was
Speaker 1: the only person who ever loved her, while every one
Speaker 1: else was just using her body. I told her that
Speaker 1: she could not label others to be users because she
Speaker 1: got those expensive gifts in return. She said that she
Speaker 1: doesn't need those fancy items, but a permanent partner to
Speaker 1: settle with because she has been hustling for the last
Speaker 1: ten years. I wished her good luck finding her man
Speaker 1: because I was no longer her man. She pleaded with
Speaker 1: me to give her another chance. She told me that
Speaker 1: she was broke and had been living on a friend's
Speaker 1: couch because she could not afford a place for herself.
Speaker 1: I told her that she had two jobs, which should
Speaker 1: be sufficient to provide her with a basic life. She
Speaker 1: started crying again and said that she never had two jobs.
Speaker 1: She had only won at the supermarket. I was shocked
Speaker 1: at the revelation because for the two years we dated,
Speaker 1: she told me that she was going out for work.
Speaker 1: She said that she used to go out with her
Speaker 1: friends every evening, hit on men at the bar, and
Speaker 1: make out with them in exchange for gifts and money.
Speaker 1: I don't want to spell it out, but that's what
Speaker 1: she meant. I was so shocked that I could barely
Speaker 1: speak a word. She added that she was about to
Speaker 1: hit her thirties, hence she is unable to juggle her
Speaker 1: day job and the night's work. She wants to settle
Speaker 1: down and lead a normal life. She pleaded with me
Speaker 1: not to judge her and take her back. She promised
Speaker 1: that she would prove to be a good wife. I
Speaker 1: assured her that I wasn't judging her at all, but
Speaker 1: it was unfair that she kept me in dark for
Speaker 1: two years. She lied to me, and she cheated on me,
Speaker 1: and I can't forget that she held my hand and
Speaker 1: cried that she was broke and needed help. I told
Speaker 1: her clearly that I could not be back with her
Speaker 1: and she should leave me alone. Her confession swirled my
Speaker 1: mind that I was dating someone who was seeing other
Speaker 1: men every other day, and I was such a fool
Speaker 1: to love her all those years. I spoke to my
Speaker 1: friend about this, the one who was with me when
Speaker 1: I saw Luna making out in that car, and he
Speaker 1: suggested that I take a STD test. Because I was
Speaker 1: with that woman for so many years while she was
Speaker 1: efching around with others, chances are there that I might
Speaker 1: have get infected. I resisted the test because I had
Speaker 1: no such symptoms, but my friend said that sometimes the
Speaker 1: symptoms take years to appear, so it's better to be safe.
Speaker 1: I have booked for the test tomorrow, hoping to come
Speaker 1: out clean. Update to Hello people. My STD reports came clean,
Speaker 1: thank god. To day, I was passing by that supermarket
Speaker 1: where I met Luna, or where she worked. Something inside
Speaker 1: me urged me to go inside. I went inside and
Speaker 1: was lurking in the food aisle when one of the
Speaker 1: tenured employees, who happened to be my colleague when I
Speaker 1: used to work there, spotted me. He came and spoke
Speaker 1: to me. He knew that I dated Luna, so I
Speaker 1: asked him if she was still working there, as I
Speaker 1: couldn't spot her. He said that Luna was fired from
Speaker 1: the job three months ago. I asked him the reason,
Speaker 1: but he said he doesn't know. I told him about
Speaker 1: my break up with Luna. Then he revealed the truth.
Speaker 1: He said that of late Luna was caught on camera
Speaker 1: trying to make advances towards male customers who looked wealthy.
Speaker 1: The security was keeping an eye on her for a
Speaker 1: long time, but since nothing was captured on the camera,
Speaker 1: they couldn't take any action. She was usually seen leaving
Speaker 1: the supermarket in their car after the shift, but three
Speaker 1: months back, she was caught making out with a customer
Speaker 1: in the secluded corner of the store. She was given
Speaker 1: a warning because she was one of the tenured employees.
Speaker 1: But a few days later, the same customer turned up
Speaker 1: at the store and created a huge scene that Luna
Speaker 1: had slipped out money from his wallet when she went
Speaker 1: to his house for the night. The management had to
Speaker 1: take action and this time she was fired. I asked
Speaker 1: him since he was working with her for so many years,
Speaker 1: did he find her shady? He said that he was
Speaker 1: shocked to know about her truth because she was very
Speaker 1: normal with her coworkers and friends. No no one knew
Speaker 1: about her dark reality. He said that Luna's reputation had
Speaker 1: gotten so bad in their working community that no one
Speaker 1: wanted to refer her or hire her. She was just
Speaker 1: using men to fund her lifestyle. I'm sharing this here
Speaker 1: so that others can be careful about the person they
Speaker 1: are dating. I feel lucky that it was just for
Speaker 1: two years. I read so many stories where the partner
Speaker 1: hid their true identity for many years, even after my marriage.
Speaker 1: Thank god I was out of it before things got
Speaker 1: too serious. Please run a background check before marrying any one,
Speaker 1: or at least spend enough time with them, meet their parents,
Speaker 1: and meet their friends before even getting serious with them.
Speaker 1: Thanks for hearing me out. That's the end of the
Speaker 1: first story. Let's begin the second one. I hope you
Speaker 1: enjoy this story. Spouse of half a dozen years requires
Speaker 1: a kidney, so I underwent testing and discovered she is
Speaker 1: my sibling. I opted to undergo testing to determine if
Speaker 1: I could offer my kidney to her wife of six years.
Speaker 1: We have two kids together for f two m My
Speaker 1: wife got sick just after our son was born and
Speaker 1: now is in need of a kidney transplant. We checked
Speaker 1: with her relatives and none were a match or a
Speaker 1: viable donor. Last week I got tested. I knew it
Speaker 1: would be a long shot, so I decided to get
Speaker 1: tested to see if I could donate. I got a
Speaker 1: call the other day saying that I was a match.
Speaker 1: The doctor then said something about wanting to do additional
Speaker 1: testing due to some information from the h l A
Speaker 1: tissue test results. I didn't think much of it and agreed.
Speaker 1: Then the results came in. I was shocked and confused.
Speaker 1: He explained that because of how DNA information is passed
Speaker 1: down through generations, apparent to a child could have at
Speaker 1: least a fifty percent match. Siblings could have a zero
Speaker 1: to one hundred percent match. It was rare to have
Speaker 1: a high match as husband and wife. I asked, what
Speaker 1: does that mean? He said that my wife and I
Speaker 1: have an apple normally high match percentage. Long stories short
Speaker 1: were related. No, I'm not kidding. I was put up
Speaker 1: for adoption before I was born, placed into a family
Speaker 1: that moved across the country. I knew I was adopted,
Speaker 1: but we didn't have any information about my bio family.
Speaker 1: It was a closed adoption. I met my wife by
Speaker 1: chance eight years ago. I was on a trip from
Speaker 1: work and she was working at the site I went to.
Speaker 1: We worked together for a week, We exchanged numbers, kept
Speaker 1: in touch. I was sent back there three more times
Speaker 1: that year, and each time we became closer, I was
Speaker 1: given the opportunity to be transferred out there in a new,
Speaker 1: higher paying position in a different department as hers. The
Speaker 1: rest is history. I don't know what to do moving forward,
Speaker 1: but I know it may be wrong. She is my
Speaker 1: wife and the mother of our kids. This post is
Speaker 1: probably going to get removed, but it is all true. Edit.
Speaker 1: Look at name. All of my family is from my
Speaker 1: adopted parents. My parents adopted me two minutes after I
Speaker 1: was born. Their name is on my birth certificate. They
Speaker 1: have not told me anything about my bio parents and
Speaker 1: don't have any info. Her family is not a match
Speaker 1: as stated above. Most of her family has low match
Speaker 1: potential or can't donate due to medical or other reasons.
Speaker 1: I am two years older than my wife. I do
Speaker 1: know that my wife was born when her parents were
Speaker 1: late teens. Update two weeks later. This is an update.
Speaker 1: The original was posted about two weeks ago. Yes, I
Speaker 1: know I misspelled the cross. Yes I do have bad
Speaker 1: grammar and spelling. Yes I am stressed and freaking out. Yes,
Speaker 1: I can play the banjo. No, there was no genetic
Speaker 1: test when we got married. Our state stopped that in
Speaker 1: the nineteen nineties. No, my wife has never been stuck
Speaker 1: in the dryer, but she once got stuck under the
Speaker 1: bed joke. The reason I did not go in too
Speaker 1: much detail is to try to not be so specific
Speaker 1: that I or my wife might be recognized. Well, the
Speaker 1: front page of Reddit didn't help with that. Thank you
Speaker 1: all for your comments and feedback. I didn't respond to them,
Speaker 1: but I did read all of them. The reason her
Speaker 1: family couldn't donate was that close relatives had some medical
Speaker 1: issues that prevent them from donating. Examples high blood pressure, diabetes, cancer,
Speaker 1: heavy drinkers, and more. The further out we tested, the
Speaker 1: less percent of a match. I wanted to be tested
Speaker 1: because we needed to find someone. The doctor said it
Speaker 1: would be unlikely, but wouldn't hurt to try. I was
Speaker 1: freaking out after I got the news and had to
Speaker 1: get outside advice. When the doc said that the percentage
Speaker 1: was abnormally high and that we might be related, I
Speaker 1: kind of zoned out and started to piece things together
Speaker 1: in my mind. My parents live a thousand miles away.
Speaker 1: They met my in laws a few times, once at
Speaker 1: my wedding and when both my children were born. My
Speaker 1: children are fine. My daughter is incredibly smart for her age.
Speaker 1: My son is a handful and healthy. The way my
Speaker 1: adoption worked was when my bio mom gave birth to me.
Speaker 1: I was checked out and put in a different room.
Speaker 1: I was there, but don't know how it officially worked.
Speaker 1: From what my parents explained, they were in that room waiting.
Speaker 1: They never met my bio mom in person. My bio
Speaker 1: mom only had a profile and picked them out of
Speaker 1: many candidates. I called my parents and told them that
Speaker 1: I needed to know everything they knew about my bio mom.
Speaker 1: They told me that they had limited knowledge. They said
Speaker 1: she was a single mom that was sixteen years old.
Speaker 1: The father was not in the picture. Also, I was
Speaker 1: born in a hospital one hour from where my wife
Speaker 1: was born. Like I said, limited knowledge. Growing up, I
Speaker 1: didn't want to find out about my bio parents. To me,
Speaker 1: my parents were always my parents. I knew I was
Speaker 1: adopted and that it was a closed adoption. I figured
Speaker 1: it wouldn't matter long term. I'm not going to do
Speaker 1: an additional at home DNA test through any of the
Speaker 1: traditional testing sites like twenty three or ancestry due to
Speaker 1: personal reasons like the possibility of the family finding out.
Speaker 1: The doc said all of this to only me, not
Speaker 1: with my wife present. Some of the additional tests were
Speaker 1: done through the doctor, which was the c M test.
Speaker 1: I'm not an expert on DNA testing. They said it
Speaker 1: was like a nineteen hundred plus c M match. This
Speaker 1: basically confirms one of my bio parents is one of hers.
Speaker 1: It can also mean first cousins or aunt slash uncle.
Speaker 1: I'm guessing her dad. When my kids were born, my
Speaker 1: parents brought photos of me as a baby and commented
Speaker 1: that I and my son looked a lot like my
Speaker 1: wife's dad. My son was easily explainable, but all three
Speaker 1: of us are a different story. I'm not going to
Speaker 1: bring this up ever. I might look at my fill differently,
Speaker 1: but nothing will hopefully change. I hope none of the
Speaker 1: family goes on Reddit and connects the docks. I am
Speaker 1: donating my kidney to my wife. We have started the
Speaker 1: full process that takes time and a lot of preparation.
Speaker 1: I plan on talking to my wife after the surgery
Speaker 1: and after recovery, we will decide what to do with
Speaker 1: our kids, if we are going to get them tested
Speaker 1: or ever tell them. I will not be leaving my wife.
Speaker 1: I love and will always be there for her. I
Speaker 1: made vows and I will keep them. I love her
Speaker 1: more than I would have sister. Edit to add I
Speaker 1: do plan on telling her after the surgery. She is
Speaker 1: not doing well and I think this will be even
Speaker 1: harder in her. I would rather know that I love
Speaker 1: her as a husband rather than flip her world upside
Speaker 1: down right before life changing in dangerous surgery if something
Speaker 1: were to happen. Telling our kids is not a decision
Speaker 1: I'm going to make on my own. It will be
Speaker 1: a joint thing after my wife knows new update Part
Speaker 1: one My wife is probably my half sister. Part one Again,
Speaker 1: English is my first language. I'm just bad at it.
Speaker 1: People still think this is fake, and that is okay.
Speaker 1: It is my life, not yours. In the long term,
Speaker 1: it only affects my life, not yours. Okay. First, my
Speaker 1: wife and I did go through with the transplant. We
Speaker 1: both are recovering. SLASH have recovered well now. My wife
Speaker 1: is the healthiest she has been since just after our
Speaker 1: son was born. My profile is all the other posts,
Speaker 1: but since I posted this on my profile, you most
Speaker 1: likely are up to date. I have tried to write
Speaker 1: this update about a gazillion times. Hopefully I can finish
Speaker 1: this one and not miss anything and try to give
Speaker 1: details in order. This will probably be my only update.
Speaker 1: Thanks to the people who reached out and shared your
Speaker 1: personal experiences and advice with the transplant. It helped so
Speaker 1: I kept to my original plan. I did not tell
Speaker 1: my wife about the possibility of us being related until
Speaker 1: after the surgery. Before the surgery, my parents came into
Speaker 1: town as soon as they could. It really helps having
Speaker 1: a big family support system like we have. The days
Speaker 1: leading up to the surgery seemed like there just wasn't
Speaker 1: enough time in the day for everything, with nine hundred
Speaker 1: doctor appointments, getting things prepared for worst case scenarios, researching,
Speaker 1: setting up my parents, another family in our house to
Speaker 1: watch our kids, and just spending time together as a family.
Speaker 1: The doctors were fantastic and laid everything out in a
Speaker 1: professional but relatable fashion. They answered all the questions and
Speaker 1: concerns we had leading up to, during and postop. There
Speaker 1: were a ton of questions. It was one of the
Speaker 1: best feelings seeing my wife hopeful for the first time
Speaker 1: in a long time. I knew I wouldn't be able
Speaker 1: to live with myself if I took that away from her.
Speaker 1: In the days leading up, I decided I was going
Speaker 1: to write a letter to my wife if things went
Speaker 1: bad for me but she survived. I wrote her six pages.
Speaker 1: I have small handwriting in it. I told her how
Speaker 1: much I loved her, how much she changed me from
Speaker 1: the moment we met, how she was my universe, but
Speaker 1: also how sorry I was for keeping a secret from
Speaker 1: her and lying to her. Went into details of what
Speaker 1: I found out over the last week, how we might
Speaker 1: be related, and all the evidence. I gave it to
Speaker 1: my parents to give to her if something were to
Speaker 1: happen to me, but if we both didn't make it
Speaker 1: then to read it with my in laws. I also
Speaker 1: made other letters. The surgery went well for both of us.
Speaker 1: They said my organs look mighty fine. The transplant worked
Speaker 1: out rather quickly for my wife, and her body accepted it.
Speaker 1: I ended up scratching my eye pretty bad and they
Speaker 1: put an eye patch on me. So when I saw
Speaker 1: my wife for the first time, her first words to
Speaker 1: me were the doctors knew we were here for the
Speaker 1: kidney right. Recovery over all sucks. There was virtually no
Speaker 1: position that was comfortable. Shout out to the persons who
Speaker 1: recommended sleeping in a recliner using stuffed animals my kids
Speaker 1: picked out as comfortable pillows and more. I felt like
Speaker 1: a baby because my wife never complained and was healing
Speaker 1: well and taking it easy. Me on the other hand,
Speaker 1: I am not so smart and decided I should go against
Speaker 1: doctor's orders and did not take it easy and ended
Speaker 1: up having to go to the er and have a
Speaker 1: secondary surgery to repair damages I caused. Please listen to
Speaker 1: your medical professionals. New update Part two, My wife is
Speaker 1: probably my half sister. Part two Now on to what
Speaker 1: y'all really care about during recovery. My wife got into
Speaker 1: tik Tok slash read it well. After a time she
Speaker 1: found a little post that made it way bigger than
Speaker 1: I ever intended. Looking back, I should have been more careful.
Speaker 1: Thanks for all the interaction and thanks to the ladies
Speaker 1: at two Hot Takes. My wife loves you guys. During
Speaker 1: this time, she started to ask more in death questions
Speaker 1: about my adoption. My parents were still at the house
Speaker 1: at this point. Parents answered all questions. My wife used
Speaker 1: the excuse of wanting to put a memory book together
Speaker 1: for our kids and wanted to include a family history
Speaker 1: of us growing up and including our parents who raised us.
Speaker 1: She knew most of this info, but wanted more details.
Speaker 1: She asked her dad about more details of his childhood,
Speaker 1: how he met my mill, if my mill was his
Speaker 1: first relationship. She knew some, but I was learning a lot.
Speaker 1: Also reminder, my wife was born when her parents were
Speaker 1: older teens im older than her. He said, no, Mill
Speaker 1: was not his first relationship. We ended up pulling out
Speaker 1: his old year books of his from high school and
Speaker 1: he showed us the girl who was his first real relationship.
Speaker 1: I knew she was probably my bio mom. I could
Speaker 1: see features that I have in her. He told us
Speaker 1: fond memories he had of her. He said their relationship
Speaker 1: ended because of her parents and he never saw her again.
Speaker 1: He tried finding out what happened to her, but couldn't
Speaker 1: before the internet. Shortly after that, he asked out my mill,
Speaker 1: and here we are. We got my phill side. Then
Speaker 1: my Mill said, now let me tell you how it
Speaker 1: really happened. Proceeded to tell us a different story that
Speaker 1: was more believable. Nothing about all of this was a
Speaker 1: red flag indicating that my wife knew my secret. But
Speaker 1: after that visit, I felt extremely guilty. She was healthier
Speaker 1: than she had been in years, out of the major
Speaker 1: danger zone, so I had no real excuse not to
Speaker 1: tell her any more. It took me two additional weeks
Speaker 1: to finally tell her. She noticed I was acting off
Speaker 1: and finally asked me if I was okay. I said
Speaker 1: I needed to talk to her about something serious, possibly
Speaker 1: life altering and potentially a relationship ending topic, but that
Speaker 1: I love her and will do absolutely everything she decided
Speaker 1: from that point forward. She told me that was not
Speaker 1: a good start to a conversation and asked if I
Speaker 1: wanted to try again. So I gave her the letter
Speaker 1: I had written before the surgery. She went from curious, happy, crying,
Speaker 1: intense concentration, unreadable. In my head, I basically her divorce
Speaker 1: papers and I would never see her or my kids again.
Speaker 1: Our life that we have built just got nuked. I'm
Speaker 1: dramatic in my head. When I get nervous, I pace
Speaker 1: back and forth. When she finished reading it, she took
Speaker 1: a moment, then came over to me stop me from pacing,
Speaker 1: said to look at her smile with a genuine smile
Speaker 1: and said, you are the dumbest smart person I know,
Speaker 1: then kissed me. This started a long conversation. She came
Speaker 1: across my first post after the surgery and found it
Speaker 1: oddly specific to our situation. Even though I changed some
Speaker 1: facts and circumstances, she connected the dots. This started her
Speaker 1: trying to find out if it was true, if I
Speaker 1: would eventually tell her or continue to her lie slash
Speaker 1: hide it from her. She reassured me that it changed
Speaker 1: nothing in our relationship. She is my wife, I am
Speaker 1: her husband. She will always have a piece of me
Speaker 1: with her at all times. She said, like a bunch
Speaker 1: of comments that she doesn't view it as wrong because
Speaker 1: we did not grow up together. We didn't know, and
Speaker 1: it is a bit too late to back out now.
Speaker 1: We decided to have our kids do genetic testing when
Speaker 1: they are more age appropriate, mainly for the unknown for
Speaker 1: me being adopted. We are not for now slash possibly
Speaker 1: ever telling anyone. We also looked up who we now
Speaker 1: suspect is my bio mom. What we found was that
Speaker 1: she ended up passing a few years ago due to
Speaker 1: drunk driver. Don't drink and drive, but I possibly have
Speaker 1: two other half sisters, so I have dating options down
Speaker 1: the road if needed. Wife hit me when I told
Speaker 1: her this. Kids are doing really well. All they know
Speaker 1: is that Mommy is doing better and enjoying spending more
Speaker 1: time with her and the extra energy slash playfulness that
Speaker 1: she hasn't had in a while. They are doing really well.
Speaker 1: So all in all, the best case scenario happened. The
Speaker 1: only things I would change is if the doctors tell
Speaker 1: you to take it easy and give you proper medical
Speaker 1: ada vice follow it. Also, if you are keeping a
Speaker 1: secret from your wife slash so don't. They probably know
Speaker 1: already and is just letting you keep digging the hole deeper.
Speaker 1: My wife and I are doing really well. We are
Speaker 1: probably the closest we have been in a long time.
Speaker 1: I asked her to marry me again. She said she
Speaker 1: would think about it, paused for like five long seconds,
Speaker 1: and of course, yes, I will marry you. I'm not
Speaker 1: as afraid as I was about family finding or seeing
Speaker 1: this post. I now have a goddess like force to
Speaker 1: have my back if I, slash we ever get questioned.
Speaker 1: We have made contingency plans. Like I said, I probably
Speaker 1: won't update again. I thank you all,