WEBVTT 1 00:00:01.800 --> 00:00:04.960 PEP Radio is a part of the Pennsylvania Equality Project 2 00:00:04.960 --> 00:00:08.919 that plays music, news and weather actively advocating for the 3 00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:12.880 LGBTQ plus and disabled. Since twenty twenty. 4 00:00:12.560 --> 00:00:16.679 Four, PEP Radio available on Live three sixty five, Roku, 5 00:00:17.199 --> 00:00:23.199 Alexo and ATPA Quality dot Com. 6 00:00:23.199 --> 00:00:27.199 Here at gay SA Radio, we're very happy to welcome 7 00:00:27.519 --> 00:00:32.320 the Otherring Podcast to our airwaves. Catch the show every 8 00:00:32.399 --> 00:00:38.719 Thursday at noon Caighten, bringing fresh voices and compelling conversations 9 00:00:38.759 --> 00:00:39.399 straight to you. 10 00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.119 Head over to GSA radio dot stream to find out 11 00:00:43.119 --> 00:00:45.439 how you can tune in and become part of our family. 12 00:00:45.880 --> 00:00:49.200 Don't miss it only on gay SA Radio, where you 13 00:00:49.520 --> 00:00:50.159 are family. 14 00:00:54.200 --> 00:00:58.640 One mayor and one woman joined forces to rid the world. 15 00:01:00.119 --> 00:01:06.280 What are you doing of inequality and fascism? Seriously, I'm trying. 16 00:01:07.079 --> 00:01:08.920 I'm trying to do a promo here for. 17 00:01:10.480 --> 00:01:11.280 What are you doing? 18 00:01:12.959 --> 00:01:16.120 Welcome to the Othering Podcast with my Candori. 19 00:01:27.560 --> 00:01:27.920 All Right. 20 00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:31.239 Today we are talking to Jermaine Greeves, the founder of 21 00:01:31.599 --> 00:01:35.079 Black Disabled Lives Matter. He has a creative powerhouse with 22 00:01:35.159 --> 00:01:40.079 skills and event planning, marketing and artist manager. While being 23 00:01:40.079 --> 00:01:43.680 a promoter, Germaine volunteered for the Afro Punk and Brooklyn 24 00:01:43.760 --> 00:01:47.959 Music Festival as well as for in store festivals. He 25 00:01:48.079 --> 00:01:51.400 also partnered with Not Like the Other Kids clothing line 26 00:01:51.400 --> 00:01:54.760 brand that gives back a portion of proceeds to kids 27 00:01:54.760 --> 00:02:00.000 with disabilities. Experienced in putting together sponsorship packages, Germaine has 28 00:02:00.120 --> 00:02:06.239 industry contacts and was featured on Good Morning America, NBC four, Telemundo, 29 00:02:06.920 --> 00:02:11.039 and BuzzFeed, as well as other social media. Germaine has 30 00:02:11.199 --> 00:02:15.199 also performed for the Lincoln Center and a fan made 31 00:02:15.319 --> 00:02:18.360 music video for Beyonce Welcome Jermaine. 32 00:02:18.360 --> 00:02:19.280 It's welcome you. 33 00:02:19.759 --> 00:02:22.120 Hi, welcome. That was a great introduction. 34 00:02:23.520 --> 00:02:24.319 You gave it to us. 35 00:02:24.520 --> 00:02:29.680 Yeah, I didn't realize I did that my stuff? Wow 36 00:02:30.080 --> 00:02:35.560 it is. I mean yeah, I'll even tell you I've 37 00:02:35.560 --> 00:02:38.439 done a bit more even after that. But we're gonna 38 00:02:38.479 --> 00:02:42.400 get there eventually. So what's going on with me as 39 00:02:42.400 --> 00:02:46.039 a vlade? So as of late, for about a year now, 40 00:02:46.159 --> 00:02:50.400 I've developed a documentary called GERMANE Gave Documentary and it's 41 00:02:50.439 --> 00:02:56.360 one of few awards AESO Berlin Berlin Short Film Festival 42 00:02:56.840 --> 00:03:02.520 that's an international award, and I've won something in America already. 43 00:03:02.560 --> 00:03:07.840 We did have a deal that was offered to me. 44 00:03:08.520 --> 00:03:12.199 They're still shopping the film around. That deal has not 45 00:03:12.319 --> 00:03:15.719 expired yet. I can't think too much on what was 46 00:03:15.719 --> 00:03:19.360 in it or not right now because it's not expired. 47 00:03:19.479 --> 00:03:22.400 But there is something. You know, people have been asking me, 48 00:03:22.479 --> 00:03:25.879 what's going on with the film, folks. We are shopping 49 00:03:25.919 --> 00:03:30.840 it around to the high Spindder. That's what's been going on. 50 00:03:30.879 --> 00:03:32.719 That's why you haven't seen a lot of promo for it, 51 00:03:32.759 --> 00:03:35.000 because I've been shopping it around. 52 00:03:35.599 --> 00:03:39.759 The film so love was that like making the film 53 00:03:39.960 --> 00:03:43.319 being disabled, and I. 54 00:03:43.319 --> 00:03:47.960 Made it with a filmmaker known as Gil Rios, and 55 00:03:48.120 --> 00:03:52.240 we worked together in twenty twenty four when I shot 56 00:03:52.280 --> 00:03:55.639 the film, and my reason for making it was because 57 00:03:55.759 --> 00:03:59.199 at the time, three years before this, I developed a 58 00:03:59.280 --> 00:04:02.520 chronic illness. I was already disabled with superb palsy, but 59 00:04:02.599 --> 00:04:07.280 I developed a chronic illness known as hydrotei supertiva. I 60 00:04:07.439 --> 00:04:11.639 was in chronic pain. Well, you couldn't touch me. I 61 00:04:11.800 --> 00:04:14.560 was yelling, I was screaming all the things you could 62 00:04:14.599 --> 00:04:17.279 think of. I was also in a rehab on top 63 00:04:17.319 --> 00:04:20.560 of the CPE, which it was I was already born with. 64 00:04:21.519 --> 00:04:23.439 There was so much going on in my body. I 65 00:04:23.560 --> 00:04:27.480 became so fatigued because I had another disability I had 66 00:04:27.519 --> 00:04:30.720 to deal with. That was where I had open wounds 67 00:04:31.120 --> 00:04:33.800 and I had to like close the wounds, and I 68 00:04:33.839 --> 00:04:36.920 had to eat differently. I had to change my diet 69 00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:44.560 a whole lot of stuff. I went to thirty five rehabs. Obviously, 70 00:04:44.680 --> 00:04:46.639 I called some people hell because I went to so many. 71 00:04:49.560 --> 00:04:52.160 You know, I did curse out some doctors. I did, 72 00:04:52.519 --> 00:04:54.680 you know, raise hell where I needed to be raised, 73 00:04:55.560 --> 00:04:58.639 just because I was tired of their bullshit. And what 74 00:04:58.839 --> 00:05:01.800 I have learned about Dedicaide and insurance is if you 75 00:05:01.839 --> 00:05:05.240 don't fight like hell, you don't get shipped exactly. So 76 00:05:05.639 --> 00:05:09.000 I have had to fight with insurance for something as 77 00:05:09.040 --> 00:05:12.399 simple as womb here. Right now, I'm getting three days 78 00:05:12.439 --> 00:05:14.879 of womb here, and I should really be inn seven days, 79 00:05:15.160 --> 00:05:18.480 but insurance can only give me three, said, winging into 80 00:05:18.560 --> 00:05:21.839 my next thing. I'm currently doing a fundraiser. 81 00:05:21.600 --> 00:05:24.360 Before you get Before you get there, I want to 82 00:05:24.360 --> 00:05:27.959 ask about that real quick. If you don't mind, you 83 00:05:28.680 --> 00:05:31.120 said you only get three days instead of seven. Now, 84 00:05:31.279 --> 00:05:34.040 does that mean that your pain is a lot worse 85 00:05:34.199 --> 00:05:36.399 because you're not getting to help with me throughout the week. 86 00:05:36.480 --> 00:05:39.040 Oh no, no, my pain's better. 87 00:05:39.160 --> 00:05:40.600 Actually, Okay, that's good. 88 00:05:41.519 --> 00:05:45.360 I have to backtrack a little bit. So, so before well, 89 00:05:45.439 --> 00:05:48.040 in the beginning of my HS journey, I was in 90 00:05:48.120 --> 00:05:52.000 a lot of pain and chronic illness. Then I discovered 91 00:05:52.160 --> 00:05:58.040 infusions that saved my life, that control my symptoms, that 92 00:05:58.279 --> 00:06:01.839 reduce the pain level, that reduced the amount of infections 93 00:06:01.879 --> 00:06:05.680 I would get monthly or daily. It's almost non existent 94 00:06:05.759 --> 00:06:10.160 at this point. I barely get infections. The only two. 95 00:06:10.800 --> 00:06:15.439 I feel like. I got the infection more recently because 96 00:06:15.439 --> 00:06:19.240 the weather was changing and like it's winter and my 97 00:06:19.360 --> 00:06:22.279 body in the winter time is not the best, so 98 00:06:22.600 --> 00:06:25.439 I think. And also, just you know, I been you know, 99 00:06:26.079 --> 00:06:27.639 I work, I go to school, I do a lot 100 00:06:27.680 --> 00:06:30.120 of things. Maybe I was very busy also just running 101 00:06:30.160 --> 00:06:35.079 back and forth as a New Yorker, So that may 102 00:06:35.120 --> 00:06:37.600 have been the reason I got my latest infection. But 103 00:06:37.839 --> 00:06:39.759 there's a tip that I'm going to share with everybody 104 00:06:39.800 --> 00:06:44.600 on this podcast. Before I went to the hospital in 105 00:06:44.680 --> 00:06:49.680 the emergency room for four days, ten days before, I 106 00:06:49.839 --> 00:06:53.360 told my doctors I had an infection and they refused 107 00:06:53.360 --> 00:06:57.600 to give me medication. Guys, Wow, So I went to 108 00:06:57.800 --> 00:07:00.759 the emergency room for no reason though I told them 109 00:07:00.759 --> 00:07:03.480 I had an infection, and I told them the medication 110 00:07:03.639 --> 00:07:09.600 I needed. So I am I'm tempted to almost so Medicaid. 111 00:07:09.680 --> 00:07:12.079 I really want to do it. Something in me really 112 00:07:12.199 --> 00:07:14.639 wants to do it, just because it's like, I keep 113 00:07:14.759 --> 00:07:19.160 hearing stories about people going to their primary care asking 114 00:07:19.279 --> 00:07:23.879 for meds and insurance not approving it. It's a travesty. 115 00:07:24.240 --> 00:07:27.879 It is bullshit. There's too many elderly and disabled people 116 00:07:27.920 --> 00:07:32.079 that are suffering under the system of Medicaid and Medicare 117 00:07:32.759 --> 00:07:35.560 that's not really serving them. There's no reason I should 118 00:07:35.560 --> 00:07:37.399 have been in the emergency room in the first place, 119 00:07:37.759 --> 00:07:39.720 if my doctors would have just given me the meds 120 00:07:39.720 --> 00:07:42.560 I asked for ten days before I had to go 121 00:07:42.639 --> 00:07:43.680 to the emergency room. 122 00:07:44.120 --> 00:07:47.000 Yeah, because, I mean, you would have been able to 123 00:07:48.319 --> 00:07:51.839 have the insurance pay less by getting the meds that 124 00:07:51.920 --> 00:07:54.639 you needed when you needed them instead of going to 125 00:07:54.680 --> 00:07:56.879 the er, because that just ends up costing more. 126 00:07:57.639 --> 00:08:00.560 And you know, the funny thing is the doctor acts me, oh, 127 00:08:00.639 --> 00:08:03.759 do you have the antibiotics at home? I said, no, 128 00:08:03.920 --> 00:08:07.040 I haven't taken antibiotics in three years, but I know 129 00:08:07.160 --> 00:08:10.959 I have an infection because my body feels different, and 130 00:08:11.279 --> 00:08:13.720 why are you not listening to me? I literally was like, 131 00:08:13.839 --> 00:08:16.079 what the hell is wrong with you, lady. I have 132 00:08:16.160 --> 00:08:20.800 an infection and it needs to be dealt with. I 133 00:08:20.959 --> 00:08:24.879 was kind of you know, I always have. I always 134 00:08:24.959 --> 00:08:26.639 end up being the villain and a lot of my 135 00:08:26.800 --> 00:08:30.560 doctor's stories because I give them hell every time. It's 136 00:08:30.759 --> 00:08:34.159 just for me as a disabled person. I've been disabled 137 00:08:34.240 --> 00:08:38.639 since before my second condition, So like when I see them, 138 00:08:39.279 --> 00:08:42.679 and I always tell people that adults treat people like 139 00:08:42.799 --> 00:08:49.279 disabilities like children not and we deserve respect, we deserve 140 00:08:49.360 --> 00:08:52.679 to be treated like human beings. We're not kids. Even 141 00:08:53.320 --> 00:08:57.159 even at my workplace, people kind of baby me and 142 00:08:57.240 --> 00:09:00.159 I said, tell them, no, don't do that. And I 143 00:09:00.240 --> 00:09:03.080 feel like remind people to it to remember I'm an 144 00:09:03.080 --> 00:09:06.360 adult still and I'm not a kid. And I think 145 00:09:06.559 --> 00:09:09.759 for me what I have noticed, the old I've gotten, 146 00:09:10.360 --> 00:09:12.480 the more people try to do little things to get 147 00:09:12.559 --> 00:09:15.279 over on me, and it's like, no, you can't, No, 148 00:09:15.360 --> 00:09:18.600 I'm not gonna let you. And you know, I think 149 00:09:18.679 --> 00:09:21.639 for me being in business and having to do business 150 00:09:22.159 --> 00:09:25.440 with other people, I've cussed people out. I've ran down 151 00:09:25.480 --> 00:09:29.080 on people in my wheelchair for money. I am that crazy. 152 00:09:29.960 --> 00:09:33.679 And I do not play. It's it's I don't play 153 00:09:33.720 --> 00:09:36.200 a lot of games, and anybody that knows me knows 154 00:09:36.279 --> 00:09:39.480 that the games will not be played with. And I'm 155 00:09:39.679 --> 00:09:42.159 very serious about who and what I am and what 156 00:09:42.320 --> 00:09:44.399 I'm trying to do. So if you think you're gonna 157 00:09:44.399 --> 00:09:48.679 play me, you're gonna play yourself. I don't really play 158 00:09:48.840 --> 00:09:51.120 like that, and I don't you know, And I know 159 00:09:51.320 --> 00:09:53.000 that a lot of people try to play me because 160 00:09:53.039 --> 00:09:55.000 I'm in the chair and I think I won't do anything. 161 00:09:55.320 --> 00:09:57.320 Oh honey, I'm gonna do something you won't like. 162 00:09:57.679 --> 00:10:02.120 It's because of the infantile ze that we get when 163 00:10:02.480 --> 00:10:05.600 we become disabled, even though they it could be from 164 00:10:05.679 --> 00:10:08.600 birth and you know that they're adults or they're an 165 00:10:08.600 --> 00:10:13.519 adult that becomes disabled, and they still infantilize you, assuming 166 00:10:13.679 --> 00:10:17.039 that you know, all of a sudden are mental acuity 167 00:10:17.639 --> 00:10:21.200 lowers and you know, as well as our physical acuity, 168 00:10:21.840 --> 00:10:24.200 and so they want to take advantage of that. They 169 00:10:24.519 --> 00:10:27.600 think that's how you do it. And unfortunately, there are 170 00:10:27.639 --> 00:10:30.240 a lot of people that are disabled that have been 171 00:10:31.000 --> 00:10:32.679 brutally taken advantage of. 172 00:10:33.559 --> 00:10:36.799 I don't play that. I gave them Helen the nursing home, 173 00:10:36.799 --> 00:10:38.960 I gave them her in the hospital. I give them 174 00:10:39.000 --> 00:10:42.399 Hell at home, like anybody that knows me knows I'm 175 00:10:42.440 --> 00:10:50.240 going to give them hell, you know. And myself advocacy 176 00:10:50.440 --> 00:10:53.759 developed because of my mother, Like she's the main reason 177 00:10:53.799 --> 00:10:56.600 I'm such a strong self advocate because honey, she did 178 00:10:56.639 --> 00:10:58.720 not play with anybody when it came to me. So 179 00:10:59.320 --> 00:11:03.000 I learned from early on I should not play with 180 00:11:03.279 --> 00:11:07.200 myself when it came to me. I am also a 181 00:11:07.320 --> 00:11:11.759 queer person who dates, and the men try it, but 182 00:11:11.960 --> 00:11:14.000 they don't get very far because I don't play either, 183 00:11:15.120 --> 00:11:18.879 you know, I've you know, it's a lot of get 184 00:11:18.919 --> 00:11:21.440 the fuck away from me if I hit you or 185 00:11:22.480 --> 00:11:26.399 or or I'm gonna do something before something happens to you, 186 00:11:27.000 --> 00:11:30.440 Like I'm so the way, I am so protected and 187 00:11:30.519 --> 00:11:33.320 I do not play, and I set my boundaries and 188 00:11:33.399 --> 00:11:36.799 I live my life. Is should be studied. I feel 189 00:11:36.879 --> 00:11:40.759 like more disabled people should be okay with setting boundaries. 190 00:11:40.799 --> 00:11:43.919 I think there's a fear of like if I say no, 191 00:11:44.720 --> 00:11:47.600 or if if something's gonna happen to me. No, nothing's 192 00:11:47.600 --> 00:11:50.080 happened to me because I said no. I'm still here. 193 00:11:51.399 --> 00:11:53.840 Some people don't like it, but I'm still here though, 194 00:11:53.919 --> 00:11:57.759 And I think for me, I want more disabled people 195 00:11:57.840 --> 00:12:01.039 to stand in their bondness, and then they disability and say, 196 00:12:01.080 --> 00:12:03.879 you know what, I'm not going to be treated this way. 197 00:12:04.120 --> 00:12:07.519 This is not okay. Whether it's in business, in life, 198 00:12:07.679 --> 00:12:10.759 or just in existing, You're not going to treat me 199 00:12:11.039 --> 00:12:14.600 like I'm just there, like that's not okay. 200 00:12:15.279 --> 00:12:18.279 So yeah, yeah, that's great. And that's so hard to do, 201 00:12:18.480 --> 00:12:22.159 even as able bodied or non disabled however you want 202 00:12:22.200 --> 00:12:24.519 to word it. It's hard to do that and to 203 00:12:24.639 --> 00:12:27.080 fight back because there is that fear I've always had. 204 00:12:27.279 --> 00:12:30.559 I feel like, I feel like, because I'm disabled, I 205 00:12:30.639 --> 00:12:33.919 don't have a choice but to fight back. And for me, 206 00:12:34.559 --> 00:12:36.559 you know, when I think about the stuff I've created, 207 00:12:36.639 --> 00:12:40.960 Black Disabled Lives, Mather the clothing brand, all these different 208 00:12:41.000 --> 00:12:45.039 things I've done, it's forced me to say, you know what, 209 00:12:45.120 --> 00:12:48.399 I'm here, even if you don't want me here, I'm 210 00:12:48.440 --> 00:12:51.559 still here. And also I've been in a couple of 211 00:12:51.720 --> 00:12:56.600 museums internationally and in the United States as well. Right now, 212 00:12:56.799 --> 00:12:58.879 I'm in the Museum of New York City for an 213 00:12:58.919 --> 00:13:02.320 exhibit with you do You that's ongoing. 214 00:13:02.960 --> 00:13:04.279 That's awesome, it's really cool. 215 00:13:04.960 --> 00:13:07.840 No, So so it's stuff like that that's cool, and 216 00:13:08.559 --> 00:13:12.120 I've done. I was on PBS in twenty twenty four 217 00:13:13.480 --> 00:13:16.679 or COVI for long COVID stuff. Then I went to 218 00:13:16.799 --> 00:13:20.000 Congress in twenty twenty four as well. That was interesting. 219 00:13:20.440 --> 00:13:22.879 I don't know if I liked it, but it was interesting. 220 00:13:24.480 --> 00:13:25.879 Was that going to Congress. 221 00:13:26.440 --> 00:13:30.320 It was a lot of Hi, my name is Jermaine, 222 00:13:30.480 --> 00:13:32.679 this is what I do, I'm part of this, A 223 00:13:32.759 --> 00:13:36.639 lot of brown nosing and just getting to know congressional leaders. 224 00:13:37.080 --> 00:13:39.000 I don't know if they were really listening, but they 225 00:13:39.120 --> 00:13:43.399 know who I am now, so hey, you know, it's 226 00:13:43.559 --> 00:13:46.080 just you know. And I went with the advocacy group 227 00:13:46.159 --> 00:13:49.679 and it was interesting to be there again. I met 228 00:13:49.720 --> 00:13:54.279 some amazing people on that trip and it changed my life. 229 00:13:56.279 --> 00:14:00.159 Here at Gaysa Radio, we're very happy to well The 230 00:14:00.799 --> 00:14:05.320 Other Ring podcast to our airwaves. Catch the show every 231 00:14:05.440 --> 00:14:10.519 Thursday at noon C eight, bringing fresh voices and compelling 232 00:14:10.600 --> 00:14:12.399 conversations straight to you. 233 00:14:13.039 --> 00:14:16.120 Head over to GSA Radio dot stream to find out 234 00:14:16.159 --> 00:14:18.399 how you can tune in and become part of our family. 235 00:14:18.919 --> 00:14:22.200 Don't miss it only on gay SA Radio where you 236 00:14:22.559 --> 00:14:23.120 are family. 237 00:14:26.279 --> 00:14:28.039 Sorry I lost my train of thought, but like show 238 00:14:28.200 --> 00:14:32.159 our faces, show our disabilities, and show them that we're 239 00:14:32.200 --> 00:14:35.279 not just lumps on a log. Or something like that. 240 00:14:35.440 --> 00:14:37.519 Like they like to think of there that they think 241 00:14:37.639 --> 00:14:40.840 that we're invisible. We're very visible. 242 00:14:41.480 --> 00:14:44.559 I think a lot of people don't know how amazing 243 00:14:44.679 --> 00:14:46.879 we are and what we bring to the table. So 244 00:14:47.559 --> 00:14:50.919 I think that the lack of awareness of what we 245 00:14:51.000 --> 00:14:53.440 bring to the table and who we are can make 246 00:14:53.519 --> 00:14:56.200 them feel like we don't exist. But there's you know, 247 00:14:56.399 --> 00:14:59.639 I was a dancer previously, I performed that place is. 248 00:15:00.039 --> 00:15:03.120 I still dance a little bit here and there. I'm 249 00:15:03.159 --> 00:15:06.960 still an actor. I've acted, I've done commercials. You know. 250 00:15:07.200 --> 00:15:11.320 The visibility. You know, I can say that visibility comes 251 00:15:11.360 --> 00:15:14.799 at a cost because I've been hyper visible in multiple 252 00:15:14.879 --> 00:15:20.519 platforms spaces. I've been cyberbully multiple times. It was actually 253 00:15:20.639 --> 00:15:23.200 worse when I was sick because people were like, if 254 00:15:23.240 --> 00:15:26.320 you're so sick, why can't you do this? Or why 255 00:15:26.440 --> 00:15:28.399 can't you do that? And I have to explain people, 256 00:15:28.879 --> 00:15:32.840 you know, sickness looks different for everybody, even like for 257 00:15:33.120 --> 00:15:35.320 this month, I took like a month off from my 258 00:15:35.600 --> 00:15:38.320 job because of the infection I just had. I was like, 259 00:15:38.360 --> 00:15:40.799 I'm going to go back in January and do the 260 00:15:40.919 --> 00:15:43.320 job and again, but I was like, this month, I'm 261 00:15:43.399 --> 00:15:46.240 resting I'm to bring our body because I just came 262 00:15:46.279 --> 00:15:48.519 out to the hospital and I want to just rush 263 00:15:48.639 --> 00:15:53.840 back into life and adulting and being responsible just so immediately. 264 00:15:54.000 --> 00:15:57.720 So I made a you know, I made a post 265 00:15:57.799 --> 00:16:01.960 online about you know, like nine months of won't care 266 00:16:02.080 --> 00:16:05.000 support guys. I could you know, there's been only coming 267 00:16:05.080 --> 00:16:07.120 for three days. I have to cover four other days 268 00:16:07.559 --> 00:16:10.360 that they're not covering. So everyone's like, why do you 269 00:16:10.480 --> 00:16:13.039 need all that money for You're using it for trips. 270 00:16:13.080 --> 00:16:16.279 I was like, no, I'm not. I have to take 271 00:16:16.360 --> 00:16:17.279 care of myself. 272 00:16:17.919 --> 00:16:22.480 Yes, yeah, there's nothing wrong with wanting money. I want money, and. 273 00:16:22.600 --> 00:16:23.759 There's nothing wrong with earning it. 274 00:16:25.519 --> 00:16:25.679 You know. 275 00:16:26.320 --> 00:16:28.600 I tell people I have a job, but it's not 276 00:16:28.960 --> 00:16:31.480 making enough money for me to do everything I need 277 00:16:31.519 --> 00:16:33.399 to do. It's just it's just the job I have 278 00:16:33.600 --> 00:16:36.360 is part time. It's not full. It's like I'm not 279 00:16:36.559 --> 00:16:40.919 making enough to cover everything, Like genuinely, I'm not so. 280 00:16:41.639 --> 00:16:43.399 And then people get mad at me because I want 281 00:16:43.440 --> 00:16:48.159 to raise twenty thousand dollars to invest in my short film. 282 00:16:49.000 --> 00:16:53.039 It's not cheap to get my film out there. You 283 00:16:53.120 --> 00:16:56.120 think it's cheap to win these awards. It's expensive as hell. 284 00:16:57.320 --> 00:17:01.120 I mean being disabled is expensive already, so trying to 285 00:17:01.200 --> 00:17:05.839 add on, you know, showing up and being a representative 286 00:17:06.880 --> 00:17:09.680 with the movie and having to market the movie, Yeah, 287 00:17:09.720 --> 00:17:12.240 that's going to be very expensive, you know. 288 00:17:12.359 --> 00:17:15.000 And I don't have like an agent or a manager 289 00:17:15.279 --> 00:17:18.359 or anything like that. I mean, I've been signed to 290 00:17:18.480 --> 00:17:20.200 stuff and I had to drop from them because they 291 00:17:20.240 --> 00:17:24.480 weren't really helping me, right, Like I've signed with people before, 292 00:17:24.680 --> 00:17:26.559 but they helped me for a little bit, but it 293 00:17:26.680 --> 00:17:28.920 wasn't like they had like a lot of connections. A 294 00:17:28.960 --> 00:17:31.559 lot of stuff I found I found on my own 295 00:17:31.640 --> 00:17:33.839 and I had to like really work for it. So 296 00:17:34.839 --> 00:17:38.799 it's so funny how people like you're this and you're that, 297 00:17:39.079 --> 00:17:41.839 and you don't you know. Also, you know, me being 298 00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:45.039 queer and like dating that it was this whole whole 299 00:17:45.119 --> 00:17:47.799 experience too. But you know, a lot of things I 300 00:17:47.960 --> 00:17:52.960 have enjoyed as a black, disabled queer person. It's so 301 00:17:53.440 --> 00:18:00.880 much like ables masogyny, people telling me, trying to other me. 302 00:18:01.480 --> 00:18:04.400 Then people trying to infantilize me, like you said earlier, 303 00:18:04.960 --> 00:18:07.640 maybe like this kid in their mind, when I'm a 304 00:18:07.759 --> 00:18:11.079 grown adult who pays bills, and then people are okay 305 00:18:11.240 --> 00:18:14.039 with not paying me for my services, and I'm like, 306 00:18:14.160 --> 00:18:16.759 that's so weird to me. So you're okay with me 307 00:18:16.880 --> 00:18:18.200 being broke, That's. 308 00:18:18.240 --> 00:18:21.759 Like, yeah, they would be if nobody paid. 309 00:18:21.599 --> 00:18:22.400 Them, right. 310 00:18:22.720 --> 00:18:25.680 So it's just like I've had to run down on 311 00:18:25.759 --> 00:18:27.680 people for money and they're like, you really ran down 312 00:18:27.720 --> 00:18:32.000 on me? Yes, I did in my chair? What so 313 00:18:32.519 --> 00:18:35.839 I you know? People are like, you did not play, 314 00:18:36.000 --> 00:18:38.839 said I never played, but you play with me. So 315 00:18:39.039 --> 00:18:41.559 now that you know you can't play with me, it changed. 316 00:18:41.680 --> 00:18:44.119 And I feel like I wish I didn't have to 317 00:18:44.200 --> 00:18:46.559 go to crazy to get people to respect me. But 318 00:18:46.839 --> 00:18:49.920 every time I have to go to crazy for them 319 00:18:50.000 --> 00:18:52.079 to listen to what I got to say. I feel 320 00:18:52.160 --> 00:18:57.240 like being disabled is constantly having to prove to people 321 00:18:57.759 --> 00:19:01.920 you're not a psychopath yep, unfortunately, And it's just like 322 00:19:02.599 --> 00:19:05.440 every time you do something then they want to other 323 00:19:05.599 --> 00:19:07.920 you and make you feel like you're crazy. I am 324 00:19:08.000 --> 00:19:11.920 not crazy because of something you did. I am insane 325 00:19:12.079 --> 00:19:15.640 because you're putting me in a position that's unsafe. Exactly 326 00:19:16.400 --> 00:19:18.319 when people ask why, they say people don't have a 327 00:19:18.359 --> 00:19:21.960 lot of people around them, it's because I can't trust you. What. 328 00:19:23.759 --> 00:19:26.759 Yeah, it's kind of hard to trust certain people because again, 329 00:19:27.359 --> 00:19:31.640 there's so many horror stories of people being taken advantage 330 00:19:31.680 --> 00:19:37.519 of because they assume, you know, undisabled people assume that 331 00:19:38.319 --> 00:19:44.799 disabled people are automatically with the lower acuity of understanding 332 00:19:44.960 --> 00:19:48.160 and things like that, so they insist upon trying to 333 00:19:48.240 --> 00:19:52.559 take advantage, you know, stealing their money, their homes and everything. 334 00:19:53.400 --> 00:19:56.359 I'm pursuing my second and third degree right now, so 335 00:19:56.519 --> 00:19:57.480 like I'm not dumb. 336 00:19:58.240 --> 00:20:01.279 Oh no, of course not. What degrees are you looking for? 337 00:20:01.880 --> 00:20:08.160 I'm doing a bachelor's degree in journalism and communications and 338 00:20:08.359 --> 00:20:14.559 media right now at this online school. But everyone like, 339 00:20:15.119 --> 00:20:17.519 it's so weird how people think I'm so stupid. And 340 00:20:17.559 --> 00:20:21.440 then my mother are like, oh, you're really intelligent. Was 341 00:20:21.519 --> 00:20:25.920 I stupid before or after the thought process? Because I 342 00:20:26.079 --> 00:20:32.000 want to know? And then my medicaids are service service coordinators, 343 00:20:32.119 --> 00:20:35.960 Like You're always figuring things out because nobody in the 344 00:20:36.079 --> 00:20:39.000 system has helped me. So I've had out myself every time. 345 00:20:39.519 --> 00:20:42.160 I wish for the day that we have a community 346 00:20:42.440 --> 00:20:46.880 of disabled people or just allies who step in and 347 00:20:47.039 --> 00:20:50.920 stop questioning us, because I feel like disabled people are 348 00:20:51.000 --> 00:20:54.680 constantly questioned about what they're doing with their funds, what 349 00:20:54.759 --> 00:20:58.599 they're doing with their money, Like last like in October 350 00:20:58.720 --> 00:21:03.599 into November, I had to pay background. I wasn't partying 351 00:21:03.680 --> 00:21:09.559 with that money. We partyization. I like, I don't think 352 00:21:09.599 --> 00:21:13.279 people understand disabled people are not going online asking for 353 00:21:13.440 --> 00:21:16.680 help just to ask for help. We are actually struggling. 354 00:21:16.799 --> 00:21:20.920 We're not getting opportunities like able body folks. And when 355 00:21:21.000 --> 00:21:24.079 we shut up into our room, people are already sizing 356 00:21:24.200 --> 00:21:28.759 us up. We don't have a fair fight from the beginning, 357 00:21:28.920 --> 00:21:32.680 so we have to prove ourselves constantly and it's so 358 00:21:32.920 --> 00:21:33.960 dreading it is. 359 00:21:34.519 --> 00:21:37.759 And then when you have the intersectionality of you know, 360 00:21:38.839 --> 00:21:43.960 being a person of color or a female or you know, gay, 361 00:21:44.200 --> 00:21:51.359 things like that, queer, it just compounds that impression that 362 00:21:51.759 --> 00:21:54.799 you know, we're not worthy or that we're less than. 363 00:21:56.200 --> 00:21:58.920 And then on top of being disabled, it's like a 364 00:21:59.079 --> 00:21:59.799 triple whammy. 365 00:22:00.759 --> 00:22:03.240 True. I feel like, you know, what people don't talk 366 00:22:03.279 --> 00:22:07.200 about is constantly waking up every day and having to 367 00:22:07.319 --> 00:22:10.559 show up in the world and hoping that people see 368 00:22:10.599 --> 00:22:14.759 you for you. Yeah, that is something we don't talk 369 00:22:14.799 --> 00:22:17.319 about in disability, Like will people see me when I 370 00:22:17.440 --> 00:22:20.400 get up today? While people look at me and respect 371 00:22:20.519 --> 00:22:23.039 me without looking for a way to take advantage of me. 372 00:22:23.559 --> 00:22:26.839 We don't talk about what it's like to be constantly 373 00:22:26.960 --> 00:22:31.279 disabled and be dismissed, like the dismissal of it all, 374 00:22:31.400 --> 00:22:34.200 and they're trying to like do things and people will 375 00:22:34.400 --> 00:22:40.279 completely ignore you. It's not fair that we have to 376 00:22:40.359 --> 00:22:42.880 pretend like we're okay with all this. We are not okay. 377 00:22:43.400 --> 00:22:46.279 The disabled community is not okay with them trying to 378 00:22:46.359 --> 00:22:50.839 make cuts to Medicaid, the recent government shut down, all 379 00:22:51.000 --> 00:22:56.000 these things. People are using GoFundMe to pay for rent 380 00:22:56.240 --> 00:23:00.160 and their basic needs. It is very serious, and I 381 00:23:00.319 --> 00:23:05.039 don't think people understand that, Like nobody that is going 382 00:23:05.200 --> 00:23:09.200 on go fundme or any of the fundraising platforms is 383 00:23:09.279 --> 00:23:13.559 doing it because they want to. They necessarily have to. Yeah, right, 384 00:23:14.480 --> 00:23:17.640 So when people are talking about dissing people online who 385 00:23:17.720 --> 00:23:21.039 are fundraising or raising money, I don't think you should 386 00:23:21.119 --> 00:23:24.599 because you could be next your one paycheck away from 387 00:23:24.680 --> 00:23:28.559 being broke, homeless, losing your house, or not having anything. 388 00:23:29.039 --> 00:23:31.079 I was not working for two and a half years 389 00:23:31.119 --> 00:23:34.240 before I got my job. For a year and seven months. Again, 390 00:23:34.720 --> 00:23:38.359 I was those people who were using go fund me 391 00:23:38.519 --> 00:23:41.480 to raise money for rent practically every month because I 392 00:23:41.519 --> 00:23:43.480 didn't have nowhere to go where was I about to 393 00:23:43.559 --> 00:23:46.240 go in the pandemic, and then I had to look 394 00:23:46.279 --> 00:23:49.480 for resources when I was sick to make sure I 395 00:23:49.519 --> 00:23:52.359 stay kept my place. Luckily, I was in New York 396 00:23:52.400 --> 00:23:54.559 and they had a number of resources that allowed me 397 00:23:54.680 --> 00:23:57.559 to pay my rent months ahead and I was still 398 00:23:57.640 --> 00:24:00.480 in rehab and they still paid it down and they 399 00:24:00.599 --> 00:24:03.279 found a way to help me to stay in my place. 400 00:24:03.400 --> 00:24:04.920 But it was not easy. I had to do so 401 00:24:05.039 --> 00:24:08.799