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<v Speaker 1>Imagine the place where you can escape for a day,

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<v Speaker 1>get immersed in a world of rooms, inspiration and expertise,

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<v Speaker 1>where you can lay in luxury, accommodation and kids cam

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<v Speaker 1>fees from ninety five sets. Tickets are free to everyone

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<v Speaker 1>and include all the attractions you've just imagined a day

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<v Speaker 1>out at the Kia Tikia the Wonderful every Day.

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<v Speaker 2>Hey, it's your old wizard leathery lifeguard Ali Ward, dozing

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<v Speaker 2>under an umbrella while I should be making sure you're

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<v Speaker 2>not drowning. And I'm here for a little slice of

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<v Speaker 2>a minisode for your ologies appetite this week. Why Ward,

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<v Speaker 2>Why Well, this is a shorty around the longest day

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<v Speaker 2>of the year for a few reasons. Number one, I'm

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<v Speaker 2>working on a two part Mars episode for next week

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<v Speaker 2>that's just going to blow your rocket boosters right off.

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<v Speaker 2>And number two, and this is a little crazy and exciting,

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<v Speaker 2>but I'm shooting a brand new science show for a

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<v Speaker 2>very cool network. And I'm shooting like sixteen hour days.

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<v Speaker 2>Like I wake up at five am, rush just at

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<v Speaker 2>get home at eight pm, rush to bed. I have

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<v Speaker 2>been wearing mismatched socks for two weeks, just plucked from

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<v Speaker 2>my clean, lonely socks bag and I'm pretty much like

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<v Speaker 2>snorting way protein instead of having dinner because there's just

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<v Speaker 2>not time. So I'm putting this together to give myself

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<v Speaker 2>a little bit more time to work on next week's

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<v Speaker 2>episode because it's going to be so good, and also

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<v Speaker 2>because y'all, I love summer. I love it so much.

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<v Speaker 2>We just had the longest day of the year. It's

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<v Speaker 2>officially summer. And even as a summer goth in like

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<v Speaker 2>head to toe black secondhand wool garments as a teen,

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<v Speaker 2>I loved summer.

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<v Speaker 3>I loved it.

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<v Speaker 2>Cobalt twilight at nine pm, iced tea, sweating on a porch,

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<v Speaker 2>barbecue smoke, family reunions, and bonus points for getting out

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<v Speaker 2>of California to see weird bugs in to hear charming accents.

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<v Speaker 2>I just always loved it. So this week's minnesot is

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<v Speaker 2>all about some obscure summer disciplines and if there are

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<v Speaker 2>any of the peau your interests, tell me, tweet me whatever,

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<v Speaker 2>and maybe I can hunt down an ologists to go

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<v Speaker 2>further into one of these topics. But think of this

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<v Speaker 2>episode like a variety sampler pack, like little cereals, and

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<v Speaker 2>I'll await you're hollering, and maybe we can make one

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<v Speaker 2>or two happen if you really love them. So now

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<v Speaker 2>before we dive in, just a really big thanks to

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<v Speaker 2>all the patrons for making the show possible. I pay

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<v Speaker 2>the wonderful Stephen Ray Morris to edit it. I couldn't

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<v Speaker 2>do it without him, are you? And thank you to

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<v Speaker 2>everyone who decks themselves out in ologies wares from ologiesmerch

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<v Speaker 2>dot com and get yourself a dang tank top for summer,

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<v Speaker 2>or like a twenty dollars T shirt in any color,

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<v Speaker 2>maybe a dad hat to keep the broiling sun off

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<v Speaker 2>of your face. Now it supports the podcast and also

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<v Speaker 2>it helps you find other ologites in the wild, maybe

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<v Speaker 2>for a summer romance. You can also spread the word

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<v Speaker 2>of about the podcast just by tweeting or gramming, or

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<v Speaker 2>you can rate a review. Make sure you're subscribed, because

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<v Speaker 2>sometimes iTunes just will unsubscribe you from things. It happens

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<v Speaker 2>to me all the time. And also, as you know,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm a giant sappy creep and I love reading your

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<v Speaker 2>very sweet reviews. And you know, I didn't know you

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<v Speaker 2>could review vas Stitcher until like yesterday. So for this minisode,

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<v Speaker 2>I'm in a shout out so so so many Sara Saws,

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<v Speaker 2>who wrote if Lynn Manuel's Twitter feed was a science podcast,

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<v Speaker 2>This podcast, which features interviews with ologists in a wide

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<v Speaker 2>variety of fields, is a bright spot in a world

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<v Speaker 2>that can be a bit cynical about expertise and knowledge.

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<v Speaker 2>It's highly informative, a great resource for finding out more

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<v Speaker 2>about all kinds of fields, and inspires me to work hard,

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<v Speaker 2>learn more, and not be afraid to start by asking

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<v Speaker 2>a dumb question. Thank you so much. What a comparison, dude,

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<v Speaker 2>So thank you for leaving those reviews. I read them

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<v Speaker 2>and they make me so happy on days when I'm

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<v Speaker 2>tired and I have not washed my hair, which is

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<v Speaker 2>a lot of the days. Okay, ayist toology. Is this

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<v Speaker 2>a real word? No, it's not. It's an entirely fictitious word.

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<v Speaker 2>I just made up using the Latin aista, meaning summer,

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<v Speaker 2>the study of summer. It doesn't exist, so straight out

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<v Speaker 2>of the gate, I just served you up a big,

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<v Speaker 2>heaping bag of horse shit, and I'm sorry. Another word

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<v Speaker 2>I considered fabricating that doesn't exist, and I looked it

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<v Speaker 2>up is hydro polemology. That would be a great word

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<v Speaker 2>for this episode because it would mean the study of

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<v Speaker 2>water fighting. Okay, just in trying to find out if

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<v Speaker 2>that was a real word, it led me down this

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<v Speaker 2>rabbit hole. Is there a study of water fights? Please

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<v Speaker 2>say there is. There's not. But I did find out

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<v Speaker 2>that in Poland they have it tradition called wet Monday,

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<v Speaker 2>and it involves soaking each other just mercilessly. Now, according

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<v Speaker 2>to Wikipedia, boys throw water over girls and then they

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<v Speaker 2>spank them with pussy willows, or they sneak into girls'

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<v Speaker 2>homes at daybreak and throw containers of water over them

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<v Speaker 2>while they're still in bed, and then the screaming girls

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<v Speaker 2>would often be dragged to a nearby river or pond

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<v Speaker 2>for another drenching. Sometimes a girl would be carried out

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<v Speaker 2>still in her bed before bed and girl were thrown

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<v Speaker 2>into the water. Particularly attractive girls could be expected to

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<v Speaker 2>be soaked repeatedly during the day. This somewhat horrific and

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<v Speaker 2>very soggy tradition is known as smigus dingis and evidently,

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<v Speaker 2>and thankfully it seems to have evolved into a more

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<v Speaker 2>OMNo sexual affair involving little boys and girls soaking each

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<v Speaker 2>other and according to my getting sucked into a YouTube

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<v Speaker 2>vortex of adults running from other adults, slashing buckets in

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<v Speaker 2>the street, and children armed like tiny hydro militias super

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<v Speaker 2>soaking the fuck out of each other. It's a pretty

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<v Speaker 2>popular thing. So I was looking at YouTube videos of

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<v Speaker 2>all these weird Polish water fights, and then it led

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<v Speaker 2>me to remember if a hydro polymologist was a job.

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<v Speaker 2>I have interviewed literally the top master of this field,

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<v Speaker 2>and I totally forgot about it. So this season on

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<v Speaker 2>Innovation Nation for CBS, I flew to Atlanta to meet

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<v Speaker 2>a guy named Lonnie Johnson. He is a mechanical and

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<v Speaker 2>nuclear engineer. He worked for the Air Force and NASA's

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<v Speaker 2>Jet Propulsion Laboratory. He worked on the Galileo mission to Jupiter,

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<v Speaker 2>the Saturn Cassini mission, the Mars Observer project. He's like

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<v Speaker 2>a serial inventor, total genius. He has been since his youth.

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<v Speaker 2>But among his creations the super soaker. He invented the

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<v Speaker 2>super soaker. So one day in the early eighties he thought,

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<v Speaker 2>I want if my daughter could just smoke these neighborhood

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<v Speaker 2>jabbronis in a water fight, and when your dad is

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<v Speaker 2>a rocket scientist, what results is a PBC pipe water

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<v Speaker 2>gun with an empty Pepsi two liter as a fuel tank.

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<v Speaker 2>He tried it in his bathroom. It shot across the

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<v Speaker 2>room and he was like, well, dang, I believe I've

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<v Speaker 2>invented something very legendary. And so a few patents and

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<v Speaker 2>like decades later, the dude has made very minimum seventy

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<v Speaker 2>three million dollars off of this invention. How many patents

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<v Speaker 2>do you have?

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<v Speaker 1>Over one hundred patents.

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<v Speaker 4>Overall hundred, so this is just a tiny fraction of them.

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<v Speaker 1>There was some engineering involved in putting this whole scene together,

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<v Speaker 1>but you know, compared to a spacecraft, is pretty simple.

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<v Speaker 2>So if hydro polomology were a thing, Lonnie Johnson would

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<v Speaker 2>have another honorary degree, so says Dad Word FN podcast. Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>so that concludes the portion on fictitious ologies involving summer

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<v Speaker 2>onto some actual summer ologies, as discussed in the Fologies

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<v Speaker 2>episode in October. Aque Carpetologist knows all kinds of secret

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<v Speaker 2>shit about pumpkins, but also about melons. Were you to

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<v Speaker 2>encounter a melon specialist, like perhaps Zulinge, one of Shanghai's

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<v Speaker 2>top professional watermelon experts, you could say, cue, crepatologist, tell

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<v Speaker 2>me your melon thumping secrets. So apparently one thing to

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<v Speaker 2>look for when you're picking a watermelonna. I'm gonna dish

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<v Speaker 2>out some watermelon secrets. Okay, are you ready? Okay? You

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<v Speaker 2>have to look for the patch on the underbelly of

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<v Speaker 2>the melon. This is the light patch where it's been

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<v Speaker 2>in contact with the ground. That patch should be creamy

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<v Speaker 2>yellow in color. The lighter and white air it is,

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<v Speaker 2>it means it's not quite ripe yet. I didn't know that. Also,

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<v Speaker 2>it should feel heavy for its size. And you know

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<v Speaker 2>when you thump a melon in the store and you

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<v Speaker 2>do it just to look cool before you make off

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<v Speaker 2>with it to the checkstand, and you're like, I don't

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<v Speaker 2>know why I did that. I don't even know what

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<v Speaker 2>I'm listening for. I don't know what I'm doing. Okay.

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<v Speaker 2>According to cucrebetologists, it should have a dull, really hollow sound. Now,

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<v Speaker 2>another thing you can do is just buy from a

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<v Speaker 2>farmer's market and say, hey, you're a farmer, just pick

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<v Speaker 2>me a good melon. Also, seedless watermelons were invented by

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<v Speaker 2>a Midwestern plant specialist named ri Oj Eigsti, and nobody

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<v Speaker 2>wanted them for decades. He was like, I.

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<v Speaker 5>Invented a seedless watermelon. Cute goals enjoy spitting seeds at

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<v Speaker 5>each other. The fuck these seedless melons are? It's at folks, idiots.

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<v Speaker 2>He kept pedaling them and pedaling them, and then finally

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<v Speaker 2>they began taking off in like the nineteen eighties, and

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<v Speaker 2>according to an interview with him in the Chicago Tribune,

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<v Speaker 2>which was conducted in his nineties, he saw seedless watermelons

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<v Speaker 2>flourishing in a supermarket and he said to himself, Huh,

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<v Speaker 2>after all these years, it feels pretty good. And there's

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<v Speaker 2>something in my soul that's like so happy that the

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<v Speaker 2>seedless watermelon specialists got to see his invention really take off,

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<v Speaker 2>because it was decades of him being like, how can

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<v Speaker 2>you not want to see this watermelon? What's wrong with you?

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<v Speaker 2>We all want them. Also, don't toss those rhines, folks.

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<v Speaker 2>According to watermelon dot org, which is a website, you

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<v Speaker 2>can cut them up and then you can add them

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<v Speaker 2>to stir frize and eat them. You can also pickle

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<v Speaker 2>the rines. So at your next barbecue, just walk around

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<v Speaker 2>with an empty pillowcase and start loading up on everyone's

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<v Speaker 2>chewed up casticides and be like yemmers I'm gonna brin

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<v Speaker 2>this up and dine on it in several months. You

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<v Speaker 2>have my blessings. Speaking of barbecues, let's talk pyrotechnology. Wait, pyrotechnics,

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<v Speaker 2>isn't that? Is that fireworks? God? I hope. So when

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<v Speaker 2>I started researching this episode, I was like, what if

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<v Speaker 2>I had a pyrotechnologist on to talk about the bombs

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<v Speaker 2>bursting in air and the Fourth of July displays and

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<v Speaker 2>baseball games and sky booms and such. But I found

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<v Speaker 2>out that fireworks people are technically pyrotechnicians, not pyrotechnologists, So

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<v Speaker 2>firework talk will be limited to Uncle Ali telling you

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<v Speaker 2>don't blow your goddamn hands off this summer. Okay, just

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<v Speaker 2>be careful and if you're drunk, let someone else explode stuff.

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<v Speaker 2>Just sit back and watch. Don't say I never helped you.

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<v Speaker 2>Pyrotechnologists are actually anthropologists who study chillin and grilling, barbecues,

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<v Speaker 2>cooking with fire. But wait, what is a barbecue and

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<v Speaker 2>why can't I spell it right? Well? It comes from

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<v Speaker 2>the Spanish for barbicoa, which is derived from a Caribbean

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<v Speaker 2>word meaning a rack made of sticks. Those were used

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<v Speaker 2>for either sleeping on like a cot or for smoking meat.

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<v Speaker 2>Or fish above a fire. There you go. I think

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<v Speaker 2>Americans added the qu at the end, and you can

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<v Speaker 2>spell it either way. But let's be honest, all caps BBQ.

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<v Speaker 2>It's the easiest. No one wants to fuck around with

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<v Speaker 2>the Is there a C and also a Q in

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<v Speaker 2>it to spell it bbq? I don't care. Also, there

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<v Speaker 2>is a heated, fiery debate on the edemology of barbecue.

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<v Speaker 2>The first time it was recorded in English was in

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<v Speaker 2>sixteen sixty one by Edmund Hickeringill, who was a British

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<v Speaker 2>churchman with a shady history who was describing cannibalism in Jamaica.

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<v Speaker 2>He wrote, samos slain and the flesh full with barbicue,

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<v Speaker 2>wood and eat but barbecue historian, and yes that his job.

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<v Speaker 2>Andrew Warniz wrote a whole book on the colonist and

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<v Speaker 2>racist origins of the word and says that hickering Gill

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<v Speaker 2>was full of shit and he was making up tales,

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<v Speaker 2>and that barbecue is one of America's oldest and most

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<v Speaker 2>beloved traditions. So, going back in time a bit, humans

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<v Speaker 2>first started to learn about fire control, maybe as far

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<v Speaker 2>back as one point seven million years ago, but they

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<v Speaker 2>were really getting good at it about one hundred and

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<v Speaker 2>twenty five thousand years ago. There's the hotly talked about

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<v Speaker 2>cooking hypothesis. Now, this is a hypothesis that credits charring

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<v Speaker 2>otherwise inedible starchy food with humans' ability to grow these

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<v Speaker 2>bigger glucose hogs known as our brains. I mean, when

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<v Speaker 2>was the last time you ate a raw potato and

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<v Speaker 2>slayed it? Word with friends like never think about it.

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<v Speaker 4>Now.

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<v Speaker 2>Another thing to mole over while waiting for your melon

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<v Speaker 2>ryins to pickle is why historically have women been expected

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<v Speaker 2>to cook but men handle the outdoor grilling? What the fuck?

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<v Speaker 2>I tried to look for an answer, and I found

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<v Speaker 2>that a cultural anthropologist, Richard Swater, has written such a

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<v Speaker 2>book about many psychological societal mysteries on different continents. This

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<v Speaker 2>book is aptly titled why do Men Barbecue? I found

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<v Speaker 2>this after googling the phrase why do men barbecue? And

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<v Speaker 2>if I ever read that book, I'll report back. But

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<v Speaker 2>the consensus on the web, and I did look it up,

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<v Speaker 2>is because much of outdoor grilling just involves standing around

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<v Speaker 2>looking busy while other people are inside fussing over jello

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<v Speaker 2>and macaroni salad and icing down fruit platters, and also

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<v Speaker 2>you only have to do it for one season out

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<v Speaker 2>of the year, so you're like, sure, I'll be a

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<v Speaker 2>girl master. If you were to ask Yale researchers about pyrotechnology,

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<v Speaker 2>not only would the archaeologists talk about cooking relics, but

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<v Speaker 2>they would also point you to periods of time when

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<v Speaker 2>we really started to make firework for us. We were

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<v Speaker 2>glazing vessels, we were hardening weaponry, we were doing metallurgy things.

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<v Speaker 2>So pyrotechnology so many directions to go. So when you're

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<v Speaker 2>outside this summer gazing into a campfire, just think there

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<v Speaker 2>are people who have been indoors writing books about your hairy,

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<v Speaker 2>scared relatives gazing into a campfire. One last ology on

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<v Speaker 2>the topic of fiery summer evenings lamp puridology. What the

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<v Speaker 2>hell is that? Ward, It's the study of fireflies, which

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<v Speaker 2>are not flies at all. They're rather beetles with super

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<v Speaker 2>magic butts. Do you call them fireflies or lightning books?

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<v Speaker 2>You probably just all muttered aloud on the subway or

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<v Speaker 2>a jogging path or into your knitting lightning pace bugs,

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<v Speaker 2>peenie wallies. Okay. What One researcher, Bert Vox, who was

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<v Speaker 2>a linguistics professor at the University of Cambridge pulled ten

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<v Speaker 2>thousand Americans and found that around forty percent say both

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<v Speaker 2>words interchangeably, thirty percent just say firefly, and almost thirty

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<v Speaker 2>percent say lightning bug. Meanwhile, point two percent, this is

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<v Speaker 2>only two people and a whole study of ten thousand,

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<v Speaker 2>call these glowing summer cuties peeny wallies. I did not

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<v Speaker 2>know that was a term, but next time I see one,

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<v Speaker 2>I do know that it will be formally addressed as

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<v Speaker 2>your honor Captain Peenie Wally.

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<v Speaker 1>Now.

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<v Speaker 2>Growing up in California, I didn't encounter a peenie Wally

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<v Speaker 2>until I visited the East Coast of my twenties, and

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<v Speaker 2>I freaked out. I jumped around a lawn. I was

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<v Speaker 2>chasing them like I was four. So apparently the West Coast,

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<v Speaker 2>and oddly just Massachusetts says firefly, the South says lightning bugs.

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<v Speaker 2>But I want to find team Peniwally and see if

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<v Speaker 2>those two people know each other. They must, right, So

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<v Speaker 2>a few fun limp paradology tidbits. Firefly, larva, love to

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<v Speaker 2>eat snails, love them, It's weird, It's French. So how

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<v Speaker 2>do they make their butts glow? Well, they have a

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<v Speaker 2>light organ in their lower half. Think of it like

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<v Speaker 2>a glow crotch, and oxygen combines with calcium and ATP,

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<v Speaker 2>which carries energy to cells. Plus this luminescent chemical, it's

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<v Speaker 2>called luciferin. Also, luciferin sounds evil as hell literally, and

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<v Speaker 2>that's because it means light bringer, which the biblical lucifer

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<v Speaker 2>was named for. And I guess how lucifer became Satan

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<v Speaker 2>biblically may have been because of a translation error with

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<v Speaker 2>the Hebrew word meaning howl. But honestly, I just spent

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<v Speaker 2>fifteen minutes on so many websites trying to figure this out,

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<v Speaker 2>so biblical scholars correct me on this. I don't know

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<v Speaker 2>why Satan is called lucifer, but luciferin it's not evil.

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<v Speaker 2>It's just a raver crotch on a horny beetle flashing

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<v Speaker 2>it to say, hey, are you my species, because let's

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<v Speaker 2>get it on and make snail eating babies. But I guess,

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<v Speaker 2>in a kind of evil fact, some female fireflies mimic

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<v Speaker 2>the mating flashes of another species and then they lure

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<v Speaker 2>randy beetle dudes and they eat them. They're like, oh

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<v Speaker 2>my god, we should totally get together. I would love

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<v Speaker 2>to date you, and then they just eat them with

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<v Speaker 2>their faces. Now. According to Wikipedia, the species is referred

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<v Speaker 2>to as the theem fatale of fireflies, which seems a

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<v Speaker 2>little overly dramatic, but I'll take it so with that.

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<v Speaker 2>It doesn't take a ssarchologist, who is a person who

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<v Speaker 2>studies the muscular and fleshy parts of the body to

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<v Speaker 2>tell you to go put on some spandex underpants and

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<v Speaker 2>engage in hydro polemological warfare. Then maybe cool off with

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<v Speaker 2>a cue cur batological snack before you feast on pyrotechnologically

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<v Speaker 2>prepared cuisine. It's summer, you deserve it, So let me

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<v Speaker 2>know if you want to hear more about any of

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<v Speaker 2>these topics. I'll see who I can track down. And

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<v Speaker 2>thank you for having a mini listen to this eeny

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<v Speaker 2>peenie wally of an episode, and I'll be back next

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<v Speaker 2>week with tons of Martian gossip. Thank you Stephen Ray

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<v Speaker 2>Morris for tossing this together just hours before it goes

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<v Speaker 2>up to Aaron Talbert and Hannahlippo for being incredible admins

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<v Speaker 2>to the jolly group of very curious folks on the

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<v Speaker 2>Ologies podcast Facebook group. Get yourself some summer gear. If

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<v Speaker 2>you want at Ologiesmarch dot com, tag it ologies Merch

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<v Speaker 2>in your online posts so I can repost you on

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<v Speaker 2>merch Mondays. And thank you Shannon Feltus and Bonnie Dutch

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<v Speaker 2>for running that merch site. Thank you, as always to

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<v Speaker 2>the beloved summer mustachioed Stephen Ray Morris for editing. The

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<v Speaker 2>theme song was written and performed by Nick Thorburn of

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<v Speaker 2>the very vacation y named band Islands. And please remember

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<v Speaker 2>to ask all kinds of smart people all kinds of

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<v Speaker 2>seemingly stupid questions because they secretly love it. If you're

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<v Speaker 2>at a barbecue with someone, talk to them about beetle butts. Also,

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<v Speaker 2>speaking of secrets, I can proudly say this is like

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<v Speaker 2>a little bit of a humble bag that I've never

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<v Speaker 2>peed in a pool. I was utterly shocked. I did

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<v Speaker 2>an informal poll among friends, and most people seem to

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<v Speaker 2>pee in pools, even hot tubs. I was like, really, really,

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<v Speaker 2>you guys, I love you, but I can we not

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<v Speaker 2>pee in them? I don't know, apparently it's not that

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<v Speaker 2>bad for you. But also like, mmm, times are tough

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<v Speaker 2>out there, guys. Let's be kind to each other. Let's

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<v Speaker 2>not pee in the water that goes in each other's

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<v Speaker 2>mouths unless it's consensual. Okay either way, I love lots

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<v Speaker 2>ask smart people to questions.

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<v Speaker 4>Bye bye acadermatology, homeology, cryptozoology, lithology and technology, meteorology, bartology, nathology, zeriology.

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<v Speaker 1>Imagine in the place where you can escape for a day.

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<v Speaker 1>and include all the attractions you've just imagined a day

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<v Speaker 3>Day get value. You can't argue with fat Tesco with

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00:22:28.000 --> 00:22:31.079
<v Speaker 3>their amazing club card prices. Serve up something special with

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<v Speaker 3>our finest meal deal for two starring one main, two

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<v Speaker 3>sites and dessert for only sixteen year rows like Succulent Board,

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<v Speaker 3>be approved Virushinn the Strip loin Steaks with peppercorn butter

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<v Speaker 3>or delicious Iirous Chicken Parmesana served with creamy potato crotam

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<v Speaker 3>and a mix of rainbow root vegetables. And enjoy Goozillionaire

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<v Speaker 3>or salted caramel cheesecake can't argue with that shop in

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<v Speaker 3>store or online. Tesco. Every little helps available the most stores.

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<v Speaker 3>Prices very in express