WEBVTT 1 00:00:01.560 --> 00:00:05.839 Welcome to Shine Delusion Shine, the radical art of dreaming 2 00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:09.599 beyond boundaries. I am Vicky Todd, and together with doctor 3 00:00:09.679 --> 00:00:12.720 Pat we will learn to push the boundaries of our minds, 4 00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.399 to think delusionally, and create fertile ground for our big 5 00:00:16.480 --> 00:00:20.679 dreams to seed, grow, and manifest. Each episode, we will 6 00:00:20.719 --> 00:00:25.079 gain more ability to think delusionally and cultivate beyond boundaries, 7 00:00:25.160 --> 00:00:29.320 faith that we can accomplish dreams which seem unreachable. Shine 8 00:00:29.320 --> 00:00:33.719 Delusion Shine is a springboard to believing, dreaming and thinking 9 00:00:33.840 --> 00:00:37.520 beyond the ordinary, and a catalyst to living a more fulfilling, 10 00:00:37.799 --> 00:00:41.079 destiny driven life. You were born with dreams, gifts, and 11 00:00:41.159 --> 00:00:43.759 talents you are meant to use to make this world brighter. 12 00:00:43.920 --> 00:00:47.920 Let your delusional dreams shine. It all starts now. 13 00:00:50.359 --> 00:00:52.600 Hey everybody, I'm doctor Pat. Thank you for joining us 14 00:00:52.640 --> 00:00:55.560 on the show because this is a really important show. 15 00:00:56.960 --> 00:01:00.920 It's extremely important in a lot of different ways. I 16 00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:05.400 talked the other day about the influence doctor Gene Houston 17 00:01:05.480 --> 00:01:09.120 had on me very early in my career, and so 18 00:01:09.319 --> 00:01:12.439 early that I attended one of the first workshops she's 19 00:01:12.519 --> 00:01:16.079 ever done on leadership, and had it not been for 20 00:01:16.159 --> 00:01:17.959 that ten day event with her which I was not 21 00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.040 going to go to, which me enabled. She enabled me 22 00:01:21.079 --> 00:01:23.480 to go to it. Without the full charge of it, 23 00:01:24.519 --> 00:01:27.519 I don't think i'd be here today. Vicky Todd is 24 00:01:27.560 --> 00:01:31.000 going to share with you how that dynamic energy works. 25 00:01:31.439 --> 00:01:34.439 What does it mean when seeds get planted? What if 26 00:01:34.439 --> 00:01:37.319 you're in the middle of a life transition, what if 27 00:01:37.359 --> 00:01:40.840 you don't know you are today? Is called feel the 28 00:01:40.920 --> 00:01:45.719 shift because whether you can cognitively think about it, whether 29 00:01:45.760 --> 00:01:50.799 you can psychologically literally explain it, there's something that's going 30 00:01:50.840 --> 00:01:54.799 on inside of you that's calling you forward. Are you 31 00:01:54.959 --> 00:01:59.040 ready to honor it? Like Vicky Todd is doing. VICKI, 32 00:01:59.159 --> 00:02:00.840 what a great topic, what a great show. 33 00:02:01.319 --> 00:02:04.480 Oh thank you well, you know, as a memoir artist, 34 00:02:04.799 --> 00:02:08.639 this topic came out of something that happened a couple 35 00:02:08.719 --> 00:02:11.199 of weeks ago, so I thought I would share it. 36 00:02:11.919 --> 00:02:15.319 But to start off, the painting behind me is called 37 00:02:15.479 --> 00:02:20.439 Inner Beauty Blooming. And this is the first memoir art, 38 00:02:20.560 --> 00:02:24.639 you know, visual memoir painting that I had done in 39 00:02:24.639 --> 00:02:27.000 two thousand and one, when I was smack dab in 40 00:02:27.039 --> 00:02:31.240 the middle of a major life shift and so I 41 00:02:31.520 --> 00:02:36.520 was two years divorced, had also begun my doctoral program 42 00:02:36.840 --> 00:02:39.800 at the same time. So two years into that and 43 00:02:40.120 --> 00:02:43.759 I was two years away from graduation, had no idea 44 00:02:44.039 --> 00:02:46.680 at the time where I would go, what my life 45 00:02:46.719 --> 00:02:48.960 was going to look like. All I knew was after graduation, 46 00:02:49.520 --> 00:02:54.719 you have to move. You can't stay here. And oh. 47 00:02:54.879 --> 00:02:59.479 I did not receive super support from my family. My 48 00:02:59.560 --> 00:03:02.159 mom literally looked at me when I finally came to 49 00:03:02.159 --> 00:03:03.759 the point where I said I'm gonna move out of 50 00:03:03.800 --> 00:03:07.520 Texas and she literally said, you must not love us anymore. 51 00:03:08.319 --> 00:03:10.199 And it was like a dagger to my heart, you know, 52 00:03:10.879 --> 00:03:14.240 pull that one out. My dad was very heavy into 53 00:03:14.280 --> 00:03:19.879 his alcoholism at the time, and he in a loving way, 54 00:03:20.400 --> 00:03:22.919 but you know, it was just not the right solution. 55 00:03:24.360 --> 00:03:26.879 He you know, in his Texas accent, and he was 56 00:03:27.360 --> 00:03:31.319 really drunk at that time, and he just slurred out, oh, well, 57 00:03:31.360 --> 00:03:33.719 you don't have to do this, VICKI stay here. I'll 58 00:03:33.759 --> 00:03:37.479 take care of you. I appreciate that, Dad, but you know, 59 00:03:37.520 --> 00:03:41.400 that's not the solution. And my brother also said, you know, 60 00:03:41.759 --> 00:03:43.800 you really took the wind out of Daddy's sales, and 61 00:03:43.919 --> 00:03:47.039 he said that you're moving out of state. Excuse me. 62 00:03:47.120 --> 00:03:50.520 So for me at that time, right in the middle 63 00:03:51.120 --> 00:03:54.840 of that transition, it was so itchy and scratchy, and 64 00:03:54.879 --> 00:03:57.000 I didn't there were so many question marks, and I 65 00:03:57.000 --> 00:04:00.039 didn't know the answers. But all I knew was you 66 00:04:00.080 --> 00:04:04.759 cannot stay here and you cannot go back. So a 67 00:04:04.800 --> 00:04:06.919 couple of weeks ago, you know, it was one of 68 00:04:06.960 --> 00:04:09.719 those nights when you're in a deep sleep, just dead sleep, 69 00:04:09.759 --> 00:04:12.560 and you wake up and you're wide away. And usually 70 00:04:12.599 --> 00:04:14.800 in those times, not every time, but I find that 71 00:04:14.919 --> 00:04:17.800 usually in those times, somebody out there wants to say something, 72 00:04:17.920 --> 00:04:21.639 you know, God, Universe, an ancestor or something. And so 73 00:04:21.720 --> 00:04:24.680 I sat up in bed and just listened. And what 74 00:04:24.720 --> 00:04:27.480 I heard so clearly in my mind was your life 75 00:04:27.519 --> 00:04:32.399 is evolving again. You cannot go back. And that's all 76 00:04:32.439 --> 00:04:34.879 I heard. And I sat there and thought about it, 77 00:04:35.279 --> 00:04:37.160 and I thought, oh my gosh, you were back in 78 00:04:37.240 --> 00:04:41.480 this inner, beauty, blooming transition again. So I think that 79 00:04:41.600 --> 00:04:47.800 is so awesome. When God the Universe prepares us, you know, 80 00:04:47.839 --> 00:04:49.720 the first one was in two thousand and one, and 81 00:04:49.720 --> 00:04:52.920 here we are in twenty twenty six, prepares us through 82 00:04:52.959 --> 00:04:58.160 previous transitions, through previous experiences that we can draw upon 83 00:04:58.240 --> 00:04:59.759 and use that experience in wisdom. 84 00:04:59.839 --> 00:05:03.680 Now. Yeah, yeah, but you know, before the break, excuse me, 85 00:05:03.720 --> 00:05:06.839 before we came on, I commented you on your new book, 86 00:05:06.839 --> 00:05:09.800 your upcoming book, and I really wanted to point out 87 00:05:09.839 --> 00:05:13.480 to you the courage. See, you know, we don't talk 88 00:05:13.600 --> 00:05:16.040 about that a lot, but the courage it takes to 89 00:05:16.079 --> 00:05:20.560 really step fully into oneself. Now, when my dad did 90 00:05:20.600 --> 00:05:22.879 that to me about moving to Florida, I looked at 91 00:05:22.879 --> 00:05:26.879 my dad and I said, the reality is, I'll always 92 00:05:26.959 --> 00:05:30.360 love you, but I do not like Florida. End of 93 00:05:30.399 --> 00:05:33.800 the story, not going. Nothing you can do. I'm a 94 00:05:33.839 --> 00:05:36.800 New York girl. It ain't happen any dad, and he 95 00:05:36.959 --> 00:05:41.360 just laughed. But those moments are what I call speak 96 00:05:41.399 --> 00:05:43.319 out moments. 97 00:05:44.240 --> 00:05:44.480 Yeah. 98 00:05:44.639 --> 00:05:47.800 Writing a book is a gigantic speakout moment. 99 00:05:49.240 --> 00:05:54.439 Yeah. And I thank you for saying that, because there 100 00:05:54.439 --> 00:05:57.199 were many times over the past year, and you know, 101 00:05:57.240 --> 00:06:01.680 now into a few months that I thought, Wow, you're 102 00:06:01.720 --> 00:06:05.120 really exposing yourself with some things. You know, some things 103 00:06:05.160 --> 00:06:11.000 about me personally. Because I always had alcohol issues as well, 104 00:06:11.319 --> 00:06:13.040 I think that I could have gone down the same 105 00:06:13.079 --> 00:06:16.600 path as my dad, and thank God, by the grace 106 00:06:16.600 --> 00:06:19.920 of God, I have not done that. But I thought, wow, 107 00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:22.319 you know, you're telling things that do you really want 108 00:06:22.360 --> 00:06:25.000 people to know that about you. But I thought, you 109 00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:27.040 know what this is the whole thing has meant to 110 00:06:27.040 --> 00:06:30.800 help people. You know, it's hard to call my mom 111 00:06:31.040 --> 00:06:34.399 an abuser. That's a hard word for me to say that. 112 00:06:34.480 --> 00:06:37.120 You know, she was emotionally and verbally abusing me during 113 00:06:37.120 --> 00:06:41.079 some of these times. And so but you know, if 114 00:06:41.120 --> 00:06:43.879 I don't speak it out and it's not in the book, 115 00:06:44.279 --> 00:06:45.879 then the book is not going to have the power 116 00:06:45.920 --> 00:06:48.800 to reach out and help others. So it does take 117 00:06:48.879 --> 00:06:50.839 courage to do that, and it takes a lot of 118 00:06:50.920 --> 00:06:52.160 vulnerability to do that. 119 00:06:53.639 --> 00:06:56.240 Yeah, it does. And you know part of this too 120 00:06:56.680 --> 00:06:59.600 is the energy of showing up the way you're showing 121 00:06:59.680 --> 00:07:03.000 up to day, not just through the book. I mean 122 00:07:03.040 --> 00:07:04.800 you show up from the first time we did our 123 00:07:04.800 --> 00:07:07.800 first show together. I love that breakthrough show because what 124 00:07:07.839 --> 00:07:10.079 we did was I said to you, Vicky, won't you 125 00:07:10.079 --> 00:07:11.680 come on and like paint during the show? 126 00:07:11.680 --> 00:07:14.480 Do you remember that I was in the books because 127 00:07:15.160 --> 00:07:19.000 I said, I literally said, because it really shook me 128 00:07:19.279 --> 00:07:21.879 when you said, you know, why don't you do something 129 00:07:21.959 --> 00:07:25.560 live with artwork live on the show? And I literally said, hell, no, 130 00:07:26.079 --> 00:07:29.319 I know. And then I think it was Linda said 131 00:07:30.319 --> 00:07:33.319 maybe you should check why you have such a strong 132 00:07:33.399 --> 00:07:36.000 reaction to this. And I was like, Okay, you're right, 133 00:07:36.519 --> 00:07:38.600 but you know, it was my fear, like, oh my god, 134 00:07:38.639 --> 00:07:40.399 you're going to look like a fraud. You can't paint 135 00:07:40.399 --> 00:07:42.560 in front of people because I'd never done that before. 136 00:07:43.000 --> 00:07:45.519 But I did it, and guess what, it was great. 137 00:07:46.160 --> 00:07:48.319 We had a blast. I mean, and that talks to 138 00:07:48.399 --> 00:07:51.959 what you're talking about here about spiders. Now, spider happens 139 00:07:51.959 --> 00:07:54.399 to be one of my totem, but until I prepared 140 00:07:54.439 --> 00:07:56.879 for this show, I had no idea what you're about 141 00:07:56.879 --> 00:07:57.720 to share with people. 142 00:07:59.160 --> 00:08:02.759 Well, I've heard that most spiders are, you know, with 143 00:08:02.800 --> 00:08:09.199 all their eyes, they are basically blind. So you know, like, 144 00:08:09.279 --> 00:08:11.160 why do we have all these eyes if you're blind? 145 00:08:11.879 --> 00:08:14.399 But basically, you know, all the hair on their legs 146 00:08:14.399 --> 00:08:17.639 and body, that's what they used to feel vibrations in 147 00:08:17.680 --> 00:08:21.399 their web And I thought, this is exactly the same 148 00:08:21.439 --> 00:08:23.879 things when they're in the middle of a life transition, 149 00:08:24.439 --> 00:08:27.319 you're basically blind. You know, the future is fuzzy, it's 150 00:08:27.319 --> 00:08:31.399 fogged over. You can't see the specifics of where you're going, 151 00:08:31.560 --> 00:08:34.440 how to get there, what's going to happen along the way, 152 00:08:34.679 --> 00:08:38.159 And after you pass that mark, and so we really 153 00:08:38.159 --> 00:08:41.919 have to be like that spider and feel out, you know, 154 00:08:42.039 --> 00:08:47.200 be very perceptive to our intuition. You know, what is God, 155 00:08:47.279 --> 00:08:50.320 the universe or higher power trying to tell us, because 156 00:08:50.320 --> 00:08:54.919 that's such valuable information and it's small, quiet voice information, 157 00:08:55.080 --> 00:08:58.440 it's not shouting at you information. And to allow that 158 00:08:58.639 --> 00:09:02.480 to break through all the loud outside voices, that is 159 00:09:02.559 --> 00:09:06.200 such a huge tool to use to make your way 160 00:09:06.320 --> 00:09:08.039 through the next part of this transition. 161 00:09:09.519 --> 00:09:11.960 Yeah, you know, let's go through this because you know, 162 00:09:12.080 --> 00:09:14.519 part of the conversation today and part of the message 163 00:09:14.559 --> 00:09:19.480 today is really to look at what happens when we 164 00:09:19.679 --> 00:09:23.480 do have that spider courage, when we do have the 165 00:09:23.679 --> 00:09:26.879 tentacles or they probably not call that, but when we 166 00:09:26.919 --> 00:09:30.720 do have the sensitivity to feel the vibrations. You know, 167 00:09:31.120 --> 00:09:36.240 spiders rely on that for clarity. Then they have to decide, 168 00:09:36.559 --> 00:09:38.919 am I going to move forward and get that little fly? 169 00:09:39.679 --> 00:09:39.840 Right? 170 00:09:39.919 --> 00:09:42.759 You understand what I'm saying. Yeah, And if I don't, 171 00:09:43.519 --> 00:09:47.039 the consequences I'm basically not going to live. So talk 172 00:09:47.080 --> 00:09:50.240 about this in terms of your journey with the book. 173 00:09:51.200 --> 00:09:56.440 Okay, Well, I love this analogy because and I've been 174 00:09:56.480 --> 00:09:58.799 reading a lot you know, with we're in the fire 175 00:09:58.840 --> 00:10:03.279 horse here, we just solstice. I keep seeing these things 176 00:10:03.320 --> 00:10:06.080 about certain timelines that started like in twenty twenty or 177 00:10:06.080 --> 00:10:09.759 twenty eighteen, that are ending now. And I read one 178 00:10:09.919 --> 00:10:14.159 beautiful thing. I was like, yes, it said, you are 179 00:10:14.240 --> 00:10:18.399 in the place where in your adult life the most 180 00:10:18.440 --> 00:10:24.759 difficult emotional trials have now passed. Oh really, Oh great. 181 00:10:24.879 --> 00:10:27.120 I'm not quite seeing the outcome of that on the 182 00:10:27.159 --> 00:10:29.919 other side. But this is part of this transition. And 183 00:10:30.000 --> 00:10:34.320 so I keep reading that all of this energy is 184 00:10:34.360 --> 00:10:38.279 asking us to participate in some way toward pulling our 185 00:10:38.360 --> 00:10:44.879 dreams in And like you said, you know, confidence, creativity, clarity, 186 00:10:44.960 --> 00:10:47.399 all that happens when we start, you know, using our 187 00:10:47.480 --> 00:10:51.960 spidy sense and using that vibration, that intuition to take 188 00:10:52.080 --> 00:10:56.120 the next step, the next movement. And it doesn't have 189 00:10:56.159 --> 00:10:59.480 to be this huge life changing leap, you know, just 190 00:10:59.639 --> 00:11:02.240 a huge, huge leap into the unknown. It could be 191 00:11:02.360 --> 00:11:06.159 one small step. But I also read yesterday it could 192 00:11:06.240 --> 00:11:09.240 just be as simple as creating space in your mind 193 00:11:09.799 --> 00:11:12.799 to say, I am sensing that a transition is here, 194 00:11:13.360 --> 00:11:16.799 something big is coming, My life is evolving. I cannot 195 00:11:16.799 --> 00:11:19.399 go back, So I'm going to create space in my 196 00:11:19.480 --> 00:11:23.360 mind to say I welcome you. I'm preparing space for you. 197 00:11:23.720 --> 00:11:25.360 I don't know who you are yet or what this 198 00:11:25.399 --> 00:11:28.159 is going to be, but you are welcome and I 199 00:11:28.240 --> 00:11:32.759 love that so much. So, you know, just taking the 200 00:11:32.879 --> 00:11:37.039 participation thing in saying I'm not going to be like 201 00:11:37.120 --> 00:11:39.519 a spider and just say, oh, something's going on. And 202 00:11:40.039 --> 00:11:41.759 they don't just sit there like you said, you know, 203 00:11:41.799 --> 00:11:43.559 they go to that fly and wrap them up and oh, 204 00:11:43.600 --> 00:11:47.639 there's my lunch. But how can we say I feel 205 00:11:47.679 --> 00:11:52.159 this very intently, I'm sensing it very intently. What's a 206 00:11:52.200 --> 00:11:54.519 good step that I can take and that is going 207 00:11:54.559 --> 00:11:56.399 to help us to move forward? 208 00:11:57.639 --> 00:12:00.440 And you know, part of this, though, is the reason 209 00:12:00.480 --> 00:12:04.600 that's become so authentic, Vicky, is because what you're talking 210 00:12:04.600 --> 00:12:07.480 about you're going through. And I think this is the 211 00:12:07.519 --> 00:12:10.840 most important part when we talk about leadership, when we 212 00:12:10.919 --> 00:12:14.240 talk about how to influence others. You know, it's extremely 213 00:12:14.279 --> 00:12:17.360 difficult sometimes to really talk to an audience when you 214 00:12:17.440 --> 00:12:20.840 haven't been to that place yourself. But not only are 215 00:12:20.879 --> 00:12:23.480 you writing the book, not only are you passing through 216 00:12:23.519 --> 00:12:26.639 your fears, but as the artwork or a piece of 217 00:12:26.720 --> 00:12:30.120 art behind you in the show, what you're doing is 218 00:12:30.159 --> 00:12:36.840 demonstrating that it isn't the fear that stops us, it's 219 00:12:36.919 --> 00:12:42.039 the shadow sense of who we're afraid to become. Yeah, 220 00:12:42.080 --> 00:12:46.279 and not know or trust that it's going to be 221 00:12:46.360 --> 00:12:50.039 amazing and magnificent. And you set it up right. 222 00:12:51.120 --> 00:12:55.480 Yeah, Oh I love that. It is so true. And 223 00:12:56.240 --> 00:12:59.120 you know part of this is for me. I can 224 00:12:59.159 --> 00:13:01.840 be very type a personality, and I've gotten much better. 225 00:13:02.600 --> 00:13:06.080 You know, I'm going through this journey of life. But 226 00:13:06.639 --> 00:13:08.879 you know, I was having an interview with a writing 227 00:13:08.919 --> 00:13:11.720 mentor the other day about the book, and you know, 228 00:13:11.840 --> 00:13:14.360 one of the big question marks that's driving me crazy 229 00:13:14.360 --> 00:13:16.399 because the first thing everybody asks, oh, is it going 230 00:13:16.480 --> 00:13:18.960 to be published? I don't know yet, sometime in the fall, 231 00:13:19.240 --> 00:13:20.840 and so you know she's going to wait to hear 232 00:13:20.840 --> 00:13:24.879 from me to post this interview. But afterward it was 233 00:13:24.960 --> 00:13:27.240 just she and I went on one and she started 234 00:13:27.320 --> 00:13:29.679 naming out because she used toill live here in Santa Fe, 235 00:13:29.720 --> 00:13:31.919 and she said, you should try here and here and 236 00:13:31.960 --> 00:13:35.279 here when the book is published, to go you know 237 00:13:35.440 --> 00:13:39.399 book book talks, you know, scheduled book talks. And it 238 00:13:39.480 --> 00:13:41.559 kind of made me lift my head up. You know, 239 00:13:41.600 --> 00:13:44.320 if I've had my nose to the grindstone, and you know, 240 00:13:44.639 --> 00:13:46.679 on kind of this fear thought of oh my gosh, 241 00:13:46.720 --> 00:13:48.720 how is this going to work out? And she kind 242 00:13:48.720 --> 00:13:50.879 of made me lift my head up and say, oh, 243 00:13:50.960 --> 00:13:54.639 there is life after this, and it will come eventually. 244 00:13:55.120 --> 00:13:58.360 But the caveat here, especially for type A people like me, 245 00:13:59.240 --> 00:14:02.960 I cannot get into that thing of striving, striving, striving 246 00:14:02.960 --> 00:14:05.360 that I'm going to force this to happen and take 247 00:14:05.399 --> 00:14:08.240 all of these actions and get out of alignment with 248 00:14:08.279 --> 00:14:11.960 my higher power. And I call that baby Bear Porridge. 249 00:14:12.000 --> 00:14:15.240 Remember the three bears. One was too old, one was 250 00:14:15.279 --> 00:14:17.960 too hot, baby Bear Porridge was just right. And so 251 00:14:18.200 --> 00:14:20.960 I think that, you know, God, Universe is wanting us 252 00:14:21.000 --> 00:14:24.960 to take this action, but it has to be aligned, 253 00:14:25.200 --> 00:14:29.000 you know, with our divine purpose, aligned to our higher power, 254 00:14:29.080 --> 00:14:30.799 and not just be doing stuff just for the heck 255 00:14:30.840 --> 00:14:33.000 of it. That I'm going to force this in. And 256 00:14:33.039 --> 00:14:35.320 so that is a lesson that I have learned, and 257 00:14:35.559 --> 00:14:39.879 I hope I'm getting better at that. Because if you strive, strive, strive, 258 00:14:40.320 --> 00:14:43.200 and keep doing all these things that are not the 259 00:14:43.320 --> 00:14:47.159 right path, it's not the right focus. You're wasting your energy, 260 00:14:47.159 --> 00:14:50.320 you're wasting your time, and I truly believe that sometimes 261 00:14:50.320 --> 00:14:53.039 God the universe will say, oh, you think you got this, 262 00:14:53.480 --> 00:14:56.000 I'm gonna sit back and let you take it. I 263 00:14:56.039 --> 00:14:59.960 don't want that. I want the supernatural favor and health. 264 00:15:00.519 --> 00:15:04.840 So baby Bear Porridge. 265 00:15:03.440 --> 00:15:05.399 Yeah, you know, there's one thing I want you to 266 00:15:05.399 --> 00:15:08.360 talk about regarding this journey, and it's something I shared 267 00:15:08.399 --> 00:15:11.440 with you before the show about myself and what I'm 268 00:15:11.480 --> 00:15:14.480 going to change personally for me. And I think you 269 00:15:14.720 --> 00:15:17.799 talk about speak out and call in supernatural favor. I 270 00:15:17.799 --> 00:15:19.840 think that's one of the things you say this in 271 00:15:19.879 --> 00:15:25.240 the show today. But what I'm strapped by for myself 272 00:15:25.440 --> 00:15:28.759 and I'm getting ready to unleash an article about something 273 00:15:28.840 --> 00:15:32.440 that I've observed which I've been very quiet about, and 274 00:15:34.000 --> 00:15:38.879 the consequences of not speaking out or sharing a story 275 00:15:39.480 --> 00:15:42.559 for me personally in the role I'm in in this lifetime, 276 00:15:43.360 --> 00:15:46.639 it's actually an injustice to the people that really need 277 00:15:46.639 --> 00:15:50.279 our help. So underneath all of this, what you're serving 278 00:15:50.360 --> 00:15:56.440 up is an actor. You're serving up a remedy for 279 00:15:56.679 --> 00:16:02.399 people that may not know what to do next. You 280 00:16:02.440 --> 00:16:03.480 see what I'm saying. 281 00:16:03.559 --> 00:16:06.440 Yes, oh, you know we have talked about that. You 282 00:16:06.559 --> 00:16:09.879 have to speak it out. Loud to call things in. Yes. 283 00:16:10.279 --> 00:16:12.720 The other day I heard a different angle on that 284 00:16:12.720 --> 00:16:15.200 that just really stopped me in my tracks because it said, 285 00:16:15.279 --> 00:16:20.480 if you stay silent, you're basically surrendering your dream, and 286 00:16:20.519 --> 00:16:23.440 not in a good way surrender, but basically you're giving 287 00:16:23.519 --> 00:16:26.120 up on it. So yemp, I don't need it. It's dead. 288 00:16:26.799 --> 00:16:31.120 So I think that it is so important even if 289 00:16:31.159 --> 00:16:34.879 we can't see the outcome, it's still fuzzy, is still vague. 290 00:16:35.600 --> 00:16:38.840 Say you know what, God, Universe, this is what I've 291 00:16:38.840 --> 00:16:41.600 heard you say to me. You know, this is part 292 00:16:41.600 --> 00:16:44.200 of my destiny project to write this book. It's a 293 00:16:44.279 --> 00:16:47.159 legacy project for me. I have no idea where we're 294 00:16:47.200 --> 00:16:49.639 going with this, but I can sense, I can feel 295 00:16:49.639 --> 00:16:52.679 that you're doing something new, God, and so I am 296 00:16:52.720 --> 00:16:57.200 making room for that. And so my prayer is, thank 297 00:16:57.240 --> 00:16:59.759 you God, you are breathing on my book. You are 298 00:17:00.120 --> 00:17:03.279 multiplying it just like those loaves and fishes and using 299 00:17:03.360 --> 00:17:05.480 it to feed the world. I don't know how that's 300 00:17:05.920 --> 00:17:07.799 what that's gonna be yet, but that's not up to me. 301 00:17:07.920 --> 00:17:10.599 The how is up to God. And also, when you 302 00:17:10.680 --> 00:17:15.359 face these really big, seemingly big mountains in your path 303 00:17:15.680 --> 00:17:20.640 along this transition. Thank you for turning this huge seaming 304 00:17:20.680 --> 00:17:25.200 mountain into a flat, easy molehill. And so just taking 305 00:17:25.279 --> 00:17:28.039 the process of saying that out loud and thanking God, 306 00:17:28.480 --> 00:17:32.880 thinking the universe along the way. That's not super specific. 307 00:17:33.640 --> 00:17:36.039 You know, use whatever He's planted in your heart and 308 00:17:36.160 --> 00:17:39.799 use those specifics, but you know, just speaking that out 309 00:17:39.839 --> 00:17:43.880 loud over and over and praising along with it. You know, 310 00:17:43.920 --> 00:17:45.960 I've heard when you praise, your raise and you can 311 00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:48.799 play and you remain and we want to move forward. 312 00:17:48.920 --> 00:17:52.119 And so I am seeing because I've gotten so much 313 00:17:52.119 --> 00:17:55.119 better at this in the past few years. And so 314 00:17:55.279 --> 00:17:57.839 in this process, when it's so uncertain, it's so vague, 315 00:17:57.839 --> 00:17:59.799 and I have all these question marks, I'm getting really 316 00:17:59.839 --> 00:18:03.000 like nervous about everything. When I stop and start that 317 00:18:03.160 --> 00:18:08.440 process of thinking, repeating, praising, that has helped move me forward. 318 00:18:09.720 --> 00:18:12.519 You know, it's so interesting they're talking about that, because 319 00:18:12.519 --> 00:18:14.359 what you're doing is we're going to talk about plant 320 00:18:14.400 --> 00:18:17.200 the seed for someone else to help your dream move forward. 321 00:18:17.559 --> 00:18:20.079 I love this because I don't know about you, but 322 00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:25.759 first half of my life was the only thing I'm 323 00:18:25.759 --> 00:18:27.519 going to say is just not going to be really 324 00:18:27.559 --> 00:18:29.599 anything any better. I wants to hear and certainly it's 325 00:18:29.599 --> 00:18:34.519 not going to be like kind enough to really transform anything. 326 00:18:35.279 --> 00:18:37.599 But I learned from that, and alcoholism is part of 327 00:18:37.640 --> 00:18:41.519 my journey, not anymore. But what I love about this 328 00:18:41.920 --> 00:18:45.319 is I love planting seeds to help other people create 329 00:18:45.359 --> 00:18:48.799 their vision. I didn't know that that that's what. Okay, 330 00:18:48.839 --> 00:18:51.000 some people have these lofty goals. I'm going to be 331 00:18:51.079 --> 00:18:55.960 a best So I'm a seed planner and I didn't 332 00:18:55.960 --> 00:18:59.000 know that that's maybe not it's going to be on 333 00:18:59.000 --> 00:19:03.359 my tombstone. That's the seed plan She was a common 334 00:19:03.440 --> 00:19:08.519 seed planner because seed planners go humbly about their business. 335 00:19:08.640 --> 00:19:11.720 Think about it. The people that plant the seeds hardly 336 00:19:11.759 --> 00:19:14.920 get noticed in the crop, you understand. 337 00:19:15.640 --> 00:19:18.000 Well, I kind of think of it like teaching, you know, 338 00:19:18.119 --> 00:19:21.400 Oh yeah it was. I talked for seventeen years and 339 00:19:21.440 --> 00:19:23.640 it was rare for a student to come to me 340 00:19:23.839 --> 00:19:25.920 and say, you know what, you really changed my life 341 00:19:25.920 --> 00:19:28.720 because of blah blah blah. You know. So it's kind 342 00:19:28.720 --> 00:19:31.000 of like you keep putting it out and you may 343 00:19:31.039 --> 00:19:33.480 not hear back from it, but it is so important 344 00:19:33.480 --> 00:19:34.359 to plant that seed. 345 00:19:35.759 --> 00:19:38.599 It's a part of that Well, you just did it. 346 00:19:38.640 --> 00:19:40.400 I mean, you had an experience he reached out to 347 00:19:40.440 --> 00:19:42.880 somebody on social media. 348 00:19:43.000 --> 00:19:46.759 So much God, so it was so specific, and so 349 00:19:46.839 --> 00:19:49.119 this is why I wanted to share it. But this 350 00:19:49.200 --> 00:19:51.559 is a karmic thing. It's a cosmic thing, is actually 351 00:19:51.599 --> 00:19:54.160 a scriptural thing that when you plant a seed for 352 00:19:54.240 --> 00:19:57.000 someone else and help them fulfill their dream, that is 353 00:19:57.039 --> 00:20:00.160 giving you more power behind your dreams, more favor or 354 00:20:00.160 --> 00:20:05.599 more resources, more oomph. And so I was looking through 355 00:20:05.599 --> 00:20:08.680 Facebook one day, and this was very recently, and I 356 00:20:08.720 --> 00:20:10.839 saw this lady who she's an acquaintance. You know, we 357 00:20:10.839 --> 00:20:12.759 here friends on Facebook, but I really don't know her. 358 00:20:13.119 --> 00:20:15.640 And she has also just written a book and hers 359 00:20:15.680 --> 00:20:18.759 is already published, and she was saying in a post 360 00:20:18.920 --> 00:20:22.400 that she would love to get it into somebody's hands 361 00:20:22.440 --> 00:20:24.720 in Hollywood, so it would go beyond the pages and 362 00:20:24.759 --> 00:20:26.880 on the screen. And you know, that's one of my 363 00:20:27.000 --> 00:20:29.519 dreams that I've mentioned. I've heard of this company called 364 00:20:29.599 --> 00:20:32.440 Voyage Media. Their whole thing is looking for stories outside 365 00:20:32.480 --> 00:20:35.720 the Hollywood bubble. And I thought, well you should I well, 366 00:20:35.759 --> 00:20:38.359 I didn't think it. I heard in my mind very 367 00:20:38.400 --> 00:20:42.000 clearly tell her about Voyage Media. And of course, the 368 00:20:42.039 --> 00:20:44.720 first thing that came to my mind was the fear ego, No, 369 00:20:44.920 --> 00:20:46.839 you can't do that, that's your dream. Why would you 370 00:20:46.880 --> 00:20:50.200 go tell her? And I thought, delete that, because you know, 371 00:20:50.480 --> 00:20:53.720 it's not a competition thing, right, And so I messaged 372 00:20:53.720 --> 00:20:55.400 her and I said, well, I've heard of this company 373 00:20:55.400 --> 00:20:57.759 and I'm thinking about doing it when my book is 374 00:20:57.759 --> 00:20:59.960 published and I get my copyright, and so I just 375 00:21:00.000 --> 00:21:02.039 through it out there. I think that she thought I 376 00:21:02.039 --> 00:21:03.880 was a little bit strange because we don't know each 377 00:21:03.880 --> 00:21:07.559 other that well. But I have no idea what she 378 00:21:07.640 --> 00:21:10.519 did with that information. That doesn't matter what when you 379 00:21:10.559 --> 00:21:14.839 plant the seed, it doesn't matter what they do with it. It's 380 00:21:14.000 --> 00:21:17.400 the thing that you planted the seed. And followed that intuition. Well, 381 00:21:17.480 --> 00:21:21.759 literally two or three days later, two super things happened. One, 382 00:21:22.079 --> 00:21:26.359 I got the finalized visual of the book cover for 383 00:21:26.480 --> 00:21:28.359 my book, because we had been going through, you know, 384 00:21:28.480 --> 00:21:32.839 various different tweaks and edits with that and I finally 385 00:21:32.839 --> 00:21:36.000 got the one and I was like, yes, that is it. 386 00:21:36.720 --> 00:21:40.960 And then I got literally a letter from the editor 387 00:21:41.319 --> 00:21:43.880 from the lady who's editing my book, and my publisher 388 00:21:43.960 --> 00:21:47.880 actually said we don't usually do this, but in your case, 389 00:21:48.319 --> 00:21:50.160 you know, since my book is a little bit different 390 00:21:50.519 --> 00:21:55.359 that it goes from reality information to you know, ancestral 391 00:21:55.440 --> 00:21:59.039 kind of mystical world. And so this lady, who I've 392 00:21:59.079 --> 00:22:01.640 never met before editor sent me this two and a 393 00:22:01.680 --> 00:22:06.519 half page beautiful letter. What she described is exactly what 394 00:22:06.640 --> 00:22:10.119 I had heard in my mind via my intuition from 395 00:22:10.119 --> 00:22:13.279 my higher power. They will not change the substance of 396 00:22:13.279 --> 00:22:16.279 your book. That is solid, that is great. It's only 397 00:22:16.519 --> 00:22:21.559 only going to be surface level changes punctuation, formatting. And 398 00:22:21.720 --> 00:22:24.759 I was like, whoa god is getting. 399 00:22:24.519 --> 00:22:28.559 That's unheard of. That's actually unheard of. I mean I understand, yeah, 400 00:22:28.599 --> 00:22:32.119 because you submitted a manuscript. 401 00:22:31.279 --> 00:22:33.160