Speaker 1: If you have small children with you right now and
Speaker 1: you're playing this over the car on the YouTube, first off,
Speaker 1: smash that subscribe button. Maybe you skip ahead about two
Speaker 1: minutes because we're about to have a real adult conversation.
Speaker 2: Oh oh boy, Okay, let's have it.
Speaker 1: So I was speaking with my wife yesterday and she
Speaker 1: said to me, how much credit do we take for
Speaker 1: the gifts that we give our son for Christmas? This year?
Speaker 1: My son is four years old? What do we claim
Speaker 1: to be ours? What do we tell him is from Santa?
Speaker 1: And I had never even thought about this. I had
Speaker 1: always just assumed through my entire life that Santa gives
Speaker 1: all the gifts.
Speaker 2: So when you were younger, your parents would write Santa
Speaker 2: on all of them. They wouldn't write from mom Orsa.
Speaker 1: That was my memory of it. And then I asked
Speaker 1: my mother and I'm like, hey, what did you do
Speaker 1: when I was a kid, And she said, I would
Speaker 1: tell you, guys every year that we got you some gifts.
Speaker 1: Santa got you some gifts, and they got mixed up.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I think that's how most parents I remember specifically,
Speaker 2: like open up stuff. Some would say Santa, some would
Speaker 2: say mom, dad, whatever. But I hears. I might have
Speaker 2: talked about this before. It had to have been around
Speaker 2: eight or nine years old where I started picking up
Speaker 2: this is a little bizarre. Why does Santa have different
Speaker 2: handwriting at every house? Like, you gotta get on the
Speaker 2: family's gotta get it if you're trying to get if
Speaker 2: you try to keep this whole charade up, you gotta
Speaker 2: have one person write all the Santa stuff or maybe
Speaker 2: type it out, I don't know, bust out your old
Speaker 2: typewriter and make make some tags. To me, that was
Speaker 2: the giveaway, Like eight or nine, I'm like, something's afoot here.
Speaker 2: There might be something going on here that that maybe
Speaker 2: Santa is not not always chocked up to be. So
Speaker 2: that's my advice to parents moreover, the deciding who, uh,
Speaker 2: you know, who gets credit for what? Figure out the
Speaker 2: Santa handwriting from day one.
Speaker 1: You know what a little old lady should do, because
Speaker 1: I've always found that little old ladies have the best handwriting, Draganana.
Speaker 1: They should start a business of writing for Santa.
Speaker 2: It's not a bad idea.
Speaker 1: My grandmother rest her soul. The best handwriting I've ever seen,
Speaker 1: beautiful cursive.
Speaker 2: My grandmother also has beautiful cursive.
Speaker 1: Beautiful cursive.
Speaker 2: Right. You know what, the only time cursive has ever
Speaker 2: helped anyone ever once on this planet planet is disguising
Speaker 2: themselves as.
Speaker 1: Santa little old ladies, best cursive in the world. So
Speaker 1: back to this, I had this question. I was like,
Speaker 1: I don't know what to do, so I asked our
Speaker 1: podcasting fathers our Fagas. I asked Rich Keef and Daddy Davey,
Speaker 1: and I said, what do you fellas do? And I
Speaker 1: believe Keith said that he would do one big gift
Speaker 1: from them to their kids, and then Santa does the rest,
Speaker 1: and then Davy will do if it's something that's more
Speaker 1: technology based, it's from them, like something that couldn't be
Speaker 1: cobbled would be from them, and then toys or clothes
Speaker 1: is from Santa. And I like, yeah, I think.
Speaker 2: The way I would play it is the one main
Speaker 2: thing they're asking for is from the parents. Everything else
Speaker 2: is from Santy.
Speaker 1: Well, what I'm gonna do now is I'm gonna let
Speaker 1: him open all of his gifts first and then whatever
Speaker 1: thing he likes the best, that's for me.
Speaker 2: Gauge the audience response, right, and we like.
Speaker 1: That's for me, not even mom. Mom didn't want to
Speaker 1: give that to you. That's for me.
Speaker 2: You got a chart it the whole time too, like, oh,
Speaker 2: yelp on that one. That's the early leader in the clubhouse.
Speaker 1: One go three, yeah, just three. King of Queen.
Speaker 3: Marl Street, entertain go and I am mac oh and
Speaker 3: all you parents out there, please tell me what you do,
Speaker 3: because I do need some advice on this.
Speaker 1: Especially as he gets old.
Speaker 2: I don't think there's a lot of advice to hand
Speaker 2: out here, think everyone.
Speaker 1: I want the best advice and the best cursive handwriting.
Speaker 1: Can everyone please write us a note in cursive. I
Speaker 1: want to see everyone's handwriting.
Speaker 2: I mean, I wonder so my younger siblings, who were
Speaker 2: twenty three twenty two in nineteen, they didn't learn cursive growing.
Speaker 1: No, I think we're the last.
Speaker 2: Each of them were last American sign linggug. So I
Speaker 2: wonder what their signatures look like. I don't think I've
Speaker 2: ever seen any of their signatures, because that's the only
Speaker 2: way I use cursive is my signature, and even then
Speaker 2: I made it my own. So there's like three letters
Speaker 2: in my signature that aren't the cursive letter. I just
Speaker 2: made them my own. So cursive was just completely useless,
Speaker 2: completely and utterly useless.
Speaker 1: First, well, it's useless.
Speaker 2: Years we're teaching people fucking cursive for no goddamn reason.
Speaker 1: It was useful when there was no computers.
Speaker 2: No, it was never useful.
Speaker 1: Tell us right now, was cursive ever useful? Mac? What
Speaker 1: are we talking about today?
Speaker 2: Uh? Dude? Today we are talking the latest entry into
Speaker 2: the Sony Spider Man universe.
Speaker 1: What the latest and last probably last?
Speaker 2: There being a little coy about this whole scenario. We're
Speaker 2: talking about craving the Hunter today. This is the sixth
Speaker 2: entry into the Sony Spider Man universe. And for my
Speaker 2: hopes and dreams, I hope, I hope, I hope this
Speaker 2: is the final entry into the Sony Spider Man.
Speaker 1: Did you see the report that they've been able to
Speaker 1: use Spider Man this entire time and they're like, we
Speaker 1: don't need them.
Speaker 2: Thank god they didn't. Thank god they didn't. They would
Speaker 2: have just butchered the whole Tom holland Spider Man.
Speaker 1: Well, but maybe maybe you could have made these villains
Speaker 1: actually villains.
Speaker 2: The other thing here, Goo is it's not technically dead
Speaker 2: because technically Goo technically speaking here you know, officially speaking,
Speaker 2: the Spider Verse movies are in this universe, yes, or
Speaker 2: in this you know playground. Additionally, we do we do
Speaker 2: have the Spider Noir series coming maybe next year, that
Speaker 2: is also in this universe, so it's not totally.
Speaker 1: Dead and fingers crossed Craven goes back in time and
Speaker 1: fights him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, hopefully they put this out out of its misery
Speaker 2: at some point. Also, there was some Spider Verse news
Speaker 2: news this past week that it's not coming out in
Speaker 2: twenty twenty five. That's delayed yet again. I don't quite
Speaker 2: understand that.
Speaker 1: I think it's hard to animate and they don't want
Speaker 1: bad reports like last time where they were like, we
Speaker 1: worked our animators to the bone.
Speaker 2: I don't think it's well, okay, that's fair. I mean,
Speaker 2: it's clearly hard to animate, but it shouldn't be hard
Speaker 2: enough that it's delayed two years. But I digress.
Speaker 1: Do you know anything about the situation?
Speaker 2: I know all of the situations, UHU, Craven, the Hunters.
Speaker 1: I'm a well read person who knows cursive. Of course,
Speaker 1: I know all about the situations.
Speaker 2: In its opening weekend, GOO eleven million at the domestic
Speaker 2: box office, one of the worst comic book openings of
Speaker 2: all time. Four million dollars less than Madam Webb. So
Speaker 2: that's really really bad worldwide goo twenty six million.
Speaker 1: Let me tell you why it deserves that. This movie,
Speaker 1: I think we all know why. Let me tell you why.
Speaker 1: The main reason why this movie is fucking lazy.
Speaker 2: This movie is bad in a way that's different than
Speaker 2: Madam Webb. It is also as much as Craven is
Speaker 2: a great Spider Man villain, he's not like the most
Speaker 2: known Spider Man villain. And on top of it, we're
Speaker 2: six movies into this Sony Spider Man universe and we
Speaker 2: don't have a Spider Man, so there's nothing holding people
Speaker 2: to this universe. We just finished our third and final
Speaker 2: Venom movie that's done, so there. This is like a
Speaker 2: hope and a dream at the end from Sony that
Speaker 2: we're like, oh, we got one last shot. We're gonna
Speaker 2: make this dark, gritty, R rated comic book movie and
Speaker 2: hopefully save this SSU And boy.
Speaker 1: That that no, but you just said, this is our
Speaker 1: sixth movie with a Spider Man villain, like a villain
Speaker 1: origin story or a villain story, And yeah, Venom makes
Speaker 1: a little bit of sense to make him more of
Speaker 1: a hero, make him an anti hero. That's what he
Speaker 1: is in the comics, that's what people kind of recognize
Speaker 1: him as. Now, it would make more sense if Spider
Speaker 1: Man was in this universe for Venom, but for the
Speaker 1: other ones, like Morbius or for Craven, they're just bad guys,
Speaker 1: and in these stories they're good guys. They're the heroes
Speaker 1: of their story.
Speaker 2: Because you're doing these villain origin stories. At some point
Speaker 2: in a in a movie and a story, you got
Speaker 2: to root for someone or root against someone, And so
Speaker 2: they've tried to make these Spider Man outright villains into
Speaker 2: anti heroes the way Venom kinda is, but these characters aren't,
Speaker 2: and it simply doesn't work because, like, to be a
Speaker 2: good villain, we don't really have to root for you,
Speaker 2: We just have to understand where you're coming from.
Speaker 1: I we just saw the fucking Penguin.
Speaker 2: Yeah, right, right, exactly.
Speaker 1: The Penguin, And like the First Joker is a pretty
Speaker 1: good example too, Like that's a villain origin story that
Speaker 1: is setting him up and we don't love it, but
Speaker 1: we understand it. Penguin, I think is perfect for you
Speaker 1: telling an in universe character story of a villain that
Speaker 1: you're kind of rooting for but also being like, I
Speaker 1: don't really like this guy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and Sony just never really understood that. So not
Speaker 2: only were they going up against the fact that these
Speaker 2: Spider Man villains are being introduced without spy Man son
Speaker 2: Spider Man, they're also oddly trying to make us root
Speaker 2: for these villains in a way that no one's ever
Speaker 2: wanted to root for a villain. So they just never
Speaker 2: they dropped the ball from the beginning. And you know,
Speaker 2: Venom comes out in twenty eighteen, which sort of jump
Speaker 2: starts this universe, which they were planning to jump start
Speaker 2: four or five years earlier after the amazing Spider Man two.
Speaker 2: They're planning this since yeah, yeah, and it just never
Speaker 2: came to fruition. And then we end up with with
Speaker 2: with Venom four or five years later, and Venom does
Speaker 2: really well. Critics hate it, but it does really well
Speaker 2: with audiences, and so they're like, oh shit, we got
Speaker 2: to capitalize on this this theme we've picked up here.
Speaker 2: And from that point Goo like Venom. I didn't mind.
Speaker 2: I somewhat enjoyed. It's not the greatest movie in the world.
Speaker 2: From that point on, they never made one more good movie.
Speaker 2: It was all bad after that, and it was like, Okay,
Speaker 2: you would have thought that they're they're kicking off this
Speaker 2: Sony Spider Man universe. Maybe they didn't think they were.
Speaker 2: You would have thought they had this overatching plan. And
Speaker 2: it's clear now that the I never had an overarching plan,
Speaker 2: never had this diagram of where they're gonna go. They
Speaker 2: were just like, oh, Venom did, well, now we have
Speaker 2: to jumpstart other shit.
Speaker 1: You could argue that these movies have gotten worse, each
Speaker 1: movie worse than the last. Now I would say that
Speaker 1: Madam Webb is a worse movie than this, but I
Speaker 1: also love Madam Webb. I would also argue that Venom
Speaker 1: three is better than Venom two, but I don't care. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this movie really reminds me of Morbius, and that's an
Speaker 1: easy one to link to where it is. It's really bad,
Speaker 1: but it's incredibly boring and not fun in a bad way.
Speaker 1: Morbius might have some more of that because Jared Leto
Speaker 1: is just chewing shit up, but this is very similar.
Speaker 1: They just slapped an R rating on it and they're like,
Speaker 1: y'all like cgi blood.
Speaker 2: I actually think Morbius is like significantly better WOWS movie and.
Speaker 1: Put that on the DVD for Morbius significantly better than Craven.
Speaker 2: What you were saying about this movie, you know, before
Speaker 2: recording and we were texting a little bit, is I
Speaker 2: feel about Marius. It's lazy, There's really not much there.
Speaker 2: It's boring. This movie's outright bad, like really bad. Ida.
Speaker 2: I don't feel that way about.
Speaker 1: Morbi This movie's really bad, but I had no fun
Speaker 1: watching it. Like I enjoy watching bad movies because there's
Speaker 1: usually some fun stuff in there. This one did have
Speaker 1: like one or two lines that were borderline there. But
Speaker 1: this had no fun to it at all. Even the kills,
Speaker 1: they weren't that good.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, come on, Craven. The Hunter is an
Speaker 2: R rated action in thriller subgenre. Here, goo, we get
Speaker 2: another new one that I'm gonna add to the top
Speaker 2: of the list. Here one person army action. Oh, it's
Speaker 2: like Predator, yeah the thing? Yeah yeah. Also, of course,
Speaker 2: superhero comic book subgenre.
Speaker 1: I would also say for the genre of superhero this
Speaker 1: is the worst kind of superhero movie. How do you
Speaker 1: mean in the fact that it came out in twenty
Speaker 1: twenty four and you could watch it and say this
Speaker 1: came out in two thousand and six, like there's no
Speaker 1: progress from the last twenty years of I'll say filmmaking.
Speaker 1: You don't have to, you know, use that literally, but
Speaker 1: like from the last twenty years of movies that we
Speaker 1: got and even our rated comic book movies that we got,
Speaker 1: where you have a blueprint, this is the laziest, just
Speaker 1: joyless piece of garbage that you could possibly watch, where
Speaker 1: there's nothing to it. And the last twenty minutes, Am
Speaker 1: I wrong? It felt like twenty minutes. It was a
Speaker 1: twenty minute sequel setup.
Speaker 2: I So I think what you're saying sort of encapsulates
Speaker 2: this whole universe, even going back to Venom, which I
Speaker 2: liked more than most, this whole Sony Foray into comic
Speaker 2: book movies, these last six you could say they all
Speaker 2: came out in two thousand and six and people would
Speaker 2: believe you. And in two thousand and six, I don't
Speaker 2: even know if people would like them, you know, like
Speaker 2: that's that's how bad this universe ended up being.
Speaker 1: How does it compared to the Fantastic four? How does
Speaker 1: it compare to Fantastic four Silver Surfer?
Speaker 2: Right right, it's in that it's in that same saying.
Speaker 1: The cgi in this the animals all looked like trash.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, I couldn't believe it.
Speaker 1: This is a superhero. I'm gonna call him a hero
Speaker 1: because he's a hero in this fucking nature boy. He's
Speaker 1: Aquaman on land? Who this The animals are so disturbingly
Speaker 1: awful looking. Where did the money go?
Speaker 2: Dude? Can you explain to me and we'll I'll get
Speaker 2: into this.
Speaker 1: By the way, I wasn't even that mad about this
Speaker 1: movie talking about it right now.
Speaker 2: No, it's true. Yeah, can you explain to me why
Speaker 2: he gets mauled by a lion at one point in
Speaker 2: this movie and the lion just lets him go.
Speaker 1: It's because his father told him he's not the man.
Speaker 2: Dude. This movie's one hundred and twenty seven minutes. It
Speaker 2: feels like three hours. I started you texting, started texting
Speaker 2: you about an hour and I considered leaving during this,
Speaker 2: but I was like, you know what, I'm just gonna go.
Speaker 1: Obligated by contract, you have to finish the movie.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, that's how bad this movie is on Rotten
Speaker 2: Tomatoes fifteen percent from the critics, seventy three percent from
Speaker 2: the audience. Now to talking, compared against the rest of
Speaker 2: The Sony Spider Man Universe, second worst critic rating, third
Speaker 2: worst audience rating. To be fair, they all didn't do
Speaker 2: well outside of the Venom Movie audience wise. None of
Speaker 2: them did well critic wise on Metacritic, A thirty five
Speaker 2: tied for second worse. The only one worse is Madam Webb.
Speaker 2: This just again, like the critics hated This Sony Spider
Speaker 2: Man Universe, the audience was okay with a lot of it,
Speaker 2: which is I guess the audience is easy to please
Speaker 2: these days. This movie is written by three people, Richard
Speaker 2: Wank and then a writing team of Art Markham and
Speaker 2: Matt Holloway. Richard Wank is a writer on the Mechanic
Speaker 2: Expendables to the Equalizer Magnificent seven, Jack Reacher, Never Go Back,
Speaker 2: Equalizer two, and Equalizer three, So clearly they brought him
Speaker 2: in for the R rated action scenes here, right, That's
Speaker 2: that's where his influence came in. And I guess maybe
Speaker 2: the best thing about this movie is the R rated
Speaker 2: action scenes, but not really because there was I don't know,
Speaker 2: they were just there, just existed. There was no build
Speaker 2: up to them upcoming. If you're interested in in subpar
Speaker 2: R rated action scenes, he's doing Lethal Weapon five and
Speaker 2: something called The Last Mission. The other two here, Art
Speaker 2: Markham and Matt Holloway were writers on Ironman first Ironman movie,
Speaker 2: Goose they got one. Then they did Punisher, Warzone, Transformers,
Speaker 2: The Last Night, Men in Black International, and Uncharted. So
Speaker 2: they're really just hanging their hats on iron Man there.
Speaker 2: So in general, it's a real bad list. Yeah, these
Speaker 2: three should not write movies ever again. This movie is
Speaker 2: directed by A J. C. Shandor, who I could have
Speaker 2: swore did something. Maybe it was a television series. I
Speaker 2: swear I recognized this name, but on IMDb you may
Speaker 2: know him from Margin Call, which I think he got
Speaker 2: an Oscar for script writing like a decade or fifteen
Speaker 2: years ago, and then A Most Violent Fear, which is
Speaker 2: a movie you might recognize. That was Oscar Isaac and
Speaker 2: one of the redheads there from Hollywood, what's their name,
Speaker 2: Jessica che Stain, you know in the same vein there
Speaker 2: upcoming doing something called The Robber and the Couple television series.
Speaker 2: In general, goo, direction, I don't know. I couldn't even
Speaker 2: focus on direction and cinematography in this movie because the
Speaker 2: writing was so bad. One of the worst written movies
Speaker 2: of all time. And it's not even not even like
Speaker 2: the big picture story plot. The in between, the character
Speaker 2: to character dialogue is the worst I have seen, maybe ever,
Speaker 2: really fucking bad.
Speaker 1: They also added in so much audio and posts. Yeah,
Speaker 1: now it was slightly better than Madam Webb, but it
Speaker 1: was all very obvious and they were just trying to
Speaker 1: fill so many holes.
Speaker 2: And it had to have been because they were probably
Speaker 2: trying some accent stuff live on set and it didn't
Speaker 2: work out.
Speaker 1: Either that or the story made less sense. Yeah, even
Speaker 1: this story pretty straightforward.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a pretty simplistic story. I'll give it credit
Speaker 2: for that. Synopsis. Craven's complex relationship with his ruthless father,
Speaker 2: Nikolai Cravenoff, starts him down a path of vengeance with
Speaker 2: brutal consequences, motivating him to become not only the greatest
Speaker 2: hunter in the world, but also one of its most fears.
Speaker 1: Now I know that the awards are supposed to be
Speaker 1: the macin Goo Awards, the cinemackin Gooviy Awards. Uh, we
Speaker 1: have a category this year for dumbest name, and it
Speaker 1: was supposed to be a real person's name. I think
Speaker 1: Cravenoff has to be in there.
Speaker 2: Well, it's probably his name from the comment.
Speaker 1: I know it definitely is, but seeing it written out
Speaker 1: and spoken is really stupid.
Speaker 2: Good. This movie stars at J Aaron Taylor Johnson as
Speaker 2: SERGEI craven Off aka Craven the Hunter. Ariana Debos is
Speaker 2: calypso Azilie. Now. I don't want to speak illy about
Speaker 2: Ariana Deboe's because I'm sure it's the writing.
Speaker 1: It's definitely, it's definitely the writing.
Speaker 2: She's been a successful actress up until this point. Her character,
Speaker 2: in her acting was fucking terrible in this movie.
Speaker 1: Really fuck look at the rest of this list, and
Speaker 1: then also look at if you look at IMDb, most
Speaker 1: of the lists, I would say ninety eight percent of
Speaker 1: this movie is men, right, yeah, yep. So I feel
Speaker 1: like they added in as much of her as possible
Speaker 1: to be like, shoot, we need a woman in this.
Speaker 2: We forgot about women in how do women speak? I
Speaker 2: don't know. Also in here is Fred Heckinger as Dimitri
Speaker 2: cravenof Serge's half brother, and the whole movie I'm like,
Speaker 2: where is this guy from? How do I recognize?
Speaker 3: You?
Speaker 1: Just see him? I know.
Speaker 2: From Gladiator to it was so distracting the whole time
Speaker 2: because I'm like, I know, I know him. I couldn't
Speaker 2: place him till I was like, this.
Speaker 1: Guy plays a sniveling weasel's I'm not even sure.
Speaker 2: I don't like the polly pocket of a fella.
Speaker 1: He's a mad max.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there you go. Alessandro Novola as Alexi Sistovich aka The.
Speaker 1: Rhino spoilers spoilers.
Speaker 2: He was playing a different character.
Speaker 1: This is not my I don't know who this is
Speaker 1: favorite line in the movie, and this is a Madam
Speaker 1: Webb like line. Do you know is it called me
Speaker 1: the Rhino? And then he just takes his little feedbag
Speaker 1: out of his side. Oh do they call you the
Speaker 1: rhino because you turn into a rhino? You quite literally
Speaker 1: turn into a rhino? Is that why they call you
Speaker 1: the Rhino?
Speaker 2: I laughed. I laughed out loud at one point when
Speaker 2: he just loudly hissed about two thirds of lay through
Speaker 2: the movie. Yeah, I don't know where the fuck that
Speaker 2: came from. I don't know what decision that was.
Speaker 1: Have you ever spoken to a rhino? Do you ever
Speaker 1: read a zoo book?
Speaker 2: I was in the movie theater with three other people,
Speaker 2: a couple sitting like five seats down for me and
Speaker 2: then someone behind me. And there were two or three
Speaker 2: different points where all four of us were laughing at
Speaker 2: this movie, laughing at it, not with it at it.
Speaker 2: It was that bad at points. Not as bad as
Speaker 2: Madame Web, don't get me wrong, but it did have
Speaker 2: some terrible moments. Good Christopher Abbott, who you would recognize
Speaker 2: from the TV series Girls, plays a character called the
Speaker 2: Foreigner in here. And I don't know what this person's
Speaker 2: powers are. I don't. I've never heard of this character.
Speaker 2: I don't know what they can and can do. Apparently
Speaker 2: they can count the three and during those three seconds,
Speaker 2: they can manipulate time and movie.
Speaker 1: Okay, they can move really fast, right, that's kind of
Speaker 1: what I picked.
Speaker 2: They can move like the flash. Yeah, I don't, I
Speaker 2: don't understand it. His character was completely inconsequential. Russell Crowe
Speaker 2: plays the father, Nikolai craven Off, and then Uri bear
Speaker 2: with me on this one. Uri colokol Nikoff as Seme
Speaker 2: and Shurney. He was the gangster in the prison that
Speaker 2: craven kills in the first eight minutes here. That's all
Speaker 2: you really need to know about this movie. I actually
Speaker 2: think Aaron Taylor Johnson did like an okay job here.
Speaker 2: Just the character wasn't good. Everyone else is terrible, terrible
Speaker 2: in this movie. But particularly and again I can't really
Speaker 2: blame her because she's thrown into the fire ariana debos.
Speaker 2: Other than Dakota Johnson might have been the worst female
Speaker 2: character I've seen all year.
Speaker 1: It's once again someone being like, we need to put
Speaker 1: a female in this and then realizing that they've never
Speaker 1: spoken to one.
Speaker 2: I don't know what they did do, but you hear
Speaker 2: the name Calypso one hundred and thirty five times in
Speaker 2: this movie, and this is what goes. This is what
Speaker 2: I'm talking about. The dialogue of this movie is so bad.
Speaker 2: Like you and I talking to each other, you just
Speaker 2: address each other when you're in the same wrong. I
Speaker 2: don't start every sentence someone who.
Speaker 1: Has listened to every one of our podcasts, you start
Speaker 1: every sentence with Goo. I started presentence with Mac to
Speaker 1: remind the people who we are on the podcast.
Speaker 2: They do it because it's somewhat comical when we're When
Speaker 2: you're just having a regular conversation and a room with
Speaker 2: just two people, you don't use their name.
Speaker 1: I don't do it for comic reasons.
Speaker 2: When we're introduced to Calypso in this movie Goo, her
Speaker 2: and her grandmother are having a conversation and her grandmother says,
Speaker 2: Calypso and had to have been fifteen times.
Speaker 1: While she was writing, and she wanted to spell it right.
Speaker 1: That was the main thing.
Speaker 2: Once again. About an hour into this movie, which was
Speaker 2: right about at the end of like the background, Young Day,
Speaker 2: I started texting you because I'm like, this movie is
Speaker 2: fucking bad. I nearly walked out. My phone was out
Speaker 2: and I didn't even care. It is unequivocally some of
Speaker 2: the worst movie dialogue of all time.
Speaker 1: The flashback is the worst origin story anything that we
Speaker 1: have seen on film. The flashback was trash back or.
Speaker 2: Does he get no? The lion gets shot and then
Speaker 2: the lion's blood drips into the wound from the lion.
Speaker 1: Yeah to then he gets talking out, talking out, yeah yeah.
Speaker 2: Then he gets a little potion from Clipso, who apparently
Speaker 2: wasn't afraid of the lion that just waltzed away, and
Speaker 2: that's how he becomes craven. That was that was he.
Speaker 1: Becomes nature boy. He becomes a little lion boy, the
Speaker 1: little lion man that the that band sings about come
Speaker 1: on Mufford sense, and I had to double check after
Speaker 1: the movie, being like, I don't think that's what Craven
Speaker 1: is supposed to be.
Speaker 2: Not as brave as you were at the start.
Speaker 1: Craven is supposed to be this huntsman. His brother's name
Speaker 1: is Mike, who what he was always sir ching for
Speaker 1: the Ultimate Game? His main thing is in the comic
Speaker 1: is that he wants to hunt Spider Man.
Speaker 2: Well, you saw in here it's his big as fears.
Speaker 1: Right, No, but it would have made more sense if
Speaker 1: it was the other way around. Where the Rhino was
Speaker 1: in complete fear of Craven, not because he's on a list,
Speaker 1: because Craven has that thirst for hunting and he knows
Speaker 1: that there's a human rhino hybrid and that seems like fun,
Speaker 1: so like he needs to have fun while hunting, not
Speaker 1: because oh he stole my brother. Whatever the fuck it is.
Speaker 2: This portrayal of the Rhino is like demonstrably worse than
Speaker 2: Paul Giamatti's Rhino at the end of Amazing Spider Man two.
Speaker 2: This iteration is so fucking bad. But I don't even
Speaker 2: want to talk about that yet. I will save that.
Speaker 1: I am a rhino. Now it's because your father told
Speaker 1: me I was the elk men, so I went with
Speaker 1: this doctor. He made me a monster.
Speaker 2: The most frustrating thing about this movie is they get
Speaker 2: the R rating, right, so you're like, okay, they can
Speaker 2: have fun. But them giving this movie the R rating
Speaker 2: and not doing it to any of the three Venom movies,
Speaker 2: which had a chance to be really good if it
Speaker 2: had gotten an R rating, it's so fucking frustrating because
Speaker 2: what they did instead with this is like, all right,
Speaker 2: we got the R rating. We're gonna say fuck a
Speaker 2: bunch of times, and there's gonna have like three scenes
Speaker 2: of brutal kills. We don't know what the rest of
Speaker 2: the movie is gonna be, but we got we got
Speaker 2: the R. We can't do that. Then they built it
Speaker 2: out from there and you can tell that's what they did,
Speaker 2: and it's it's incredibly frustrating, really really frustrating.
Speaker 1: Am I crazy? Or was Russell Crowe the best character
Speaker 1: in this movie?
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure Russell Crowe was drunk the whole time.
Speaker 1: Possibly he was drinking a lot of what looked like vodka.
Speaker 1: It might have been real vodka.
Speaker 2: He just drank did a Russian accent or a pseudo
Speaker 2: Russian accent, and then he left set.
Speaker 1: And just constantly what thought you a woman, men, a
Speaker 1: strong women, weak? And Russia?
Speaker 2: It was it was like I just I couldn't believe that,
Speaker 2: like in the year twenty twenty four Goo, the Year
Speaker 2: of Our Lord, Yeah, six movies into this universe, that
Speaker 2: the writing was this bad writing again, Madam Webb's writing
Speaker 2: is bad story wise, what happens the events and the
Speaker 2: dialogue's bad there.
Speaker 1: The dialogue is more fun.
Speaker 2: Though the dialogue in this movie, like the story and
Speaker 2: the plot here somewhat makes sense. The dialogue is so
Speaker 2: fucking bad. It's like it was written by like a
Speaker 2: twelve year old boy that like didn't like, Oh this
Speaker 2: is how adults talk like. The people that wrote this
Speaker 2: movie have never been involved in an adult conversation in
Speaker 2: their lives.
Speaker 1: Oh why is he running fast because a lion bled
Speaker 1: into him? You fucking idiot? Shall we get into the
Speaker 1: nanagon the nonsense agon fun factor? There's none, There is
Speaker 1: no fun.
Speaker 2: I started having fun when I realized the other three
Speaker 2: people in the movie were laughing at the same things
Speaker 2: I were. But it was only like two or three things.
Speaker 1: It was group fun.
Speaker 2: It was, yeah, we had it was a group effort
Speaker 2: and I was thinking about laughing, but I also was like,
Speaker 2: I don't like making noise in the theater, even though
Speaker 2: I had already taken my phone out. And then the
Speaker 2: female my pants off. The female like six seats down,
Speaker 2: couldn't contain it. After one of the things, she just
Speaker 2: like burst out and laughter, and then I was like,
Speaker 2: all right, we can have some fun here.
Speaker 1: Borometer wildly boring.
Speaker 2: The first hour of this movie is incredibly boring.
Speaker 1: And I'll say, let me let me stop you right
Speaker 1: there after that first hour though more bore, but.
Speaker 2: It was more. There is more bore, but it was
Speaker 2: more boring the first hour.
Speaker 1: Okay, we're looking at the bell curve of boring. First
Speaker 1: hour No, like I said, the origin story in it
Speaker 1: fucking horrible.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And it wasn't even like and I guess we'll
Speaker 2: get to.
Speaker 1: This and spoilers sad as factor. I was not satisfied
Speaker 1: by this movie at all, and if anything, it made
Speaker 1: me sad, sad that I had wasted my time.
Speaker 2: Yeah for an R rated comic book movie with Aaron
Speaker 2: Taylor Johnson, who I really like it to be this
Speaker 2: bad did make me saddy.
Speaker 1: Like they should have thrown him a bone here because
Speaker 1: they had so much adr. Anyways, that's audio that you
Speaker 1: add in post that they should have let him, say,
Speaker 1: go watch Nusferatu in two weeks. I'm better in that.
Speaker 2: They should have let him fuck around with the Russian accent. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you might. If it's the movie's gonna be this bad,
Speaker 2: Let him have a bad.
Speaker 1: Let him do Yakov spear enoff, let him do what
Speaker 1: I've been doing this whole time. Halloween. I will never
Speaker 1: ever watch this again. I've rewatched Madam Webb. I have
Speaker 1: rewatched Madam Web twice now. I watched it on a plane.
Speaker 1: It was a palate cleanser on the plane.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this movie is terrible. There's nothing to rewatch in here, nothing.
Speaker 1: Water World, the aquater World. Is this better or worse
Speaker 1: than nineteen ninety five classic water World? And it is
Speaker 1: way worse.
Speaker 2: Yeah, if Madam Webb's at the center of the earth,
Speaker 2: so then maybe you have fun again with the lava.
Speaker 2: This is sitting at the bottom of the ocean floor.
Speaker 1: This the action from the nineteen ninety five movie, better
Speaker 1: than action in the twenty twenty four movie.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and Admittedly I did like the the bear Trap kill,
Speaker 2: but that was about it.
Speaker 1: In this movie Plemonade. When life gives you plemings, you
Speaker 1: make Plemonade. And Russell Crowe was the best actor in
Speaker 1: this movie.
Speaker 2: He didn't make Plemingade though.
Speaker 1: No one made Plemonade. No one did.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 1: Remember what he was getting shot at and he picked
Speaker 1: up that smaller, weaker man than he used him as
Speaker 1: his shield. I like that. I guess, like, actually, you
Speaker 1: know bullets. You understand how you understand how fucking weaponry works.
Speaker 1: If you hold up someone while being shot at, will
Speaker 1: they block the bullets or will the bullets go through
Speaker 1: them and then hit you?
Speaker 2: It depends what bullet is being fired and what gun
Speaker 2: is firing them a lot of variables.
Speaker 1: Those look like pretty high caliber guns.
Speaker 2: It could definitely rip through and then it maybe might
Speaker 2: hurt you. I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 1: You told me at the beginning of this episode that
Speaker 1: you know everything, and so far you've known nothing.
Speaker 2: There's nothing to know in this movie.
Speaker 1: The guys go on X right now, go on Instagram,
Speaker 1: tell us can you block bullets with the human body
Speaker 1: without being affected?
Speaker 2: Some you can?
Speaker 1: Yes, you are just you don't tear your goots. Okay,
Speaker 1: get off the fence? Yes or no? Can you eat
Speaker 1: the moon if it's made out of barbecue spare rooms?
Speaker 1: Or would you not? Could you? The answer is obviously
Speaker 1: yes you could. You can eat the moon right now
Speaker 1: if it's made out of rocks. I'm not gonna tell
Speaker 1: you too, but you could. Max credit Union, who are
Speaker 1: you giving credit to?
Speaker 2: I guess Aaron Taylor Johnson for trying trying his darness.
Speaker 1: No, he wasn't trying. I don't think he was trying.
Speaker 2: Dude, did you see his fucking abdomen?
Speaker 1: Come on, he's obviously he looked great. But what I'm
Speaker 1: saying so you are under selling him and his talent
Speaker 1: by saying that he's trying in this don't do that.
Speaker 2: I think he tried. I think when he when when
Speaker 2: he signed up for this movie, he thought he thought
Speaker 2: there'd be something here.
Speaker 1: He turned it at first. Mac thinks that Aaron Taylor
Speaker 1: Johnson is a shitty actor.
Speaker 2: No, I think he tried. The writing goo writing again.
Speaker 1: Look, the writing deserves all of the blame. Sony Pictures
Speaker 1: deserves all of the blame. Spam deserves all of the blame,
Speaker 1: but don't give people credit for being.
Speaker 2: Shore No no, because in direct contrast, the co star
Speaker 2: aren't in a Debo's notable. Trier doesn't try in this movie.
Speaker 2: She's fucking terrible.
Speaker 1: That's because she can't. She can't try in this I mean,
Speaker 1: you might be right, you might be pants ten City
Speaker 1: Excite bike Mania, And I will say that the builds
Speaker 1: up to finally getting the rhino. I'm like, Okay, let's
Speaker 1: fucking see this rhino. Let's see this stupid battle that's
Speaker 1: been teased a couple times.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this stupid fuck and rhino that we saw on
Speaker 2: the trailer. Yet somehow they're saving for the final.
Speaker 1: Fifteen And then finally they showed it, and they showed
Speaker 1: the battle, and I'm like, this is what we've been
Speaker 1: building toward this entire time. This is it.
Speaker 2: Yikes again. I liked the guy taking the bear trap
Speaker 2: to the head. That was That was solid. That was
Speaker 2: about the only time the R rating was worth it.
Speaker 2: Everything else was There's no credit to be delved out here. This,
Speaker 2: this is this movie is terrible.
Speaker 1: Did you get a little you know, a little pants tent?
Speaker 1: What do you put on the vest at the end
Speaker 1: and He's like, maybe I'm not the good guy. Maybe
Speaker 1: I am a bad guy because.
Speaker 2: I am like some people drive, you know.
Speaker 1: I go, I drive with two hands on the wheel.
Speaker 2: Like this, going two miles per hour below the speed limit.
Speaker 1: Well, you don't want to go too fast, too furious?
Speaker 1: Yeah right, Mac. For those of you tarty to the
Speaker 1: Mac and Goo party, we rate everything on a forty
Speaker 1: hot dog rating system. Mac, there was uh the animal CGI.
Speaker 1: I thought that was complete. Douchie, you mentioned the action,
Speaker 1: the R rated action. The editing on the action was nauseating.
Speaker 1: I hated it. It looked terrible. It's an uninteresting story,
Speaker 1: it's poorly paced, and there's no humor. Where's the fun
Speaker 1: in this? It's a comic book movie. What are we doing?
Speaker 1: And it's not bad enough to be fun. If you're
Speaker 1: gonna be bad, be bad, just accept it. Be shitty.
Speaker 1: It reminds me a lot, and I'm saying, like, Black
Speaker 1: Adams better than this, but it reminds me how just
Speaker 1: cookie cutter. And they're like, well, I think the people
Speaker 1: will like this, let's just do this shit. And it
Speaker 1: doesn't pay off at all. No, this is the worst
Speaker 1: of what comic book movies have to offer. There's nothing new,
Speaker 1: it thinks it's edgy, and it makes a fan favorite
Speaker 1: villain a hero. Why not let's have people cheer for them, right,
Speaker 1: And then the last twenty ish minutes I don't know
Speaker 1: how fucking time works anymore, is just to set up
Speaker 1: a sequel to what what are we setting up a
Speaker 1: sequel to?
Speaker 2: Right? Yeah, the Chameleon solo movie.
Speaker 1: I can't wait to see that snibbling weasel back on.
Speaker 2: Screen, which, by the way, you talk about the CGI
Speaker 2: with the animals, the CGI Chameleon some of the worst
Speaker 2: we've ever seen.
Speaker 1: That was couldn't you tell the entire time he could
Speaker 1: do voices? He was doing the voices the entire time.
Speaker 1: I'm like, this is a like a young fucking Bill
Speaker 1: Hayter up there.
Speaker 2: He is so distractingly little that you think they that
Speaker 2: he's cgi'ed little.
Speaker 1: And for some reason, and I don't know if his
Speaker 1: hands are small, but my eyes were really just drawn
Speaker 1: to his hands because I felt like they were tiny,
Speaker 1: like Uncle Jack and it's always sunny. He should have
Speaker 1: put giant fake hands on good.
Speaker 2: What is your hot talk creating for this?
Speaker 1: I don't know. I watched this a week ago. And
Speaker 1: I hate it, but I still like it more than
Speaker 1: Kinds of Kindness and Joker because of the promise that
Speaker 1: I was given with those movies.
Speaker 2: Okay, so definitively, you have three worst movies than this
Speaker 2: on the year.
Speaker 1: Right, But my final movie, Madam Webb, I would take
Speaker 1: over almost any movie on the year, over percent of
Speaker 1: the movies on the year, I'll say twelve hot Dogs.
Speaker 1: Oh thirteen, motherfuck no, No, I'm gonna go one higher
Speaker 1: than you because you hated it more than me. You
Speaker 1: texted me at the time being like, this is the
Speaker 1: worst fucking thing ever. I think I think it's better
Speaker 1: than worse, but also worse than better done. Put that
Speaker 1: on the DVD cover.
Speaker 2: Kil This is everything. This is fucking everything. I have
Speaker 2: to use your name, Calypso, this is everything everything I've
Speaker 2: always been worried about with R rated comic book movies,
Speaker 2: they thought just having a few gory scenes and some swears.
Speaker 1: And not even al Gore.
Speaker 2: So they built this movie around the few action set
Speaker 2: pieces and some swears and just filled in the restroom there,
Speaker 2: resulting in one of the worst written movies ever.
Speaker 1: Do you imagine a giant craven timeline where they'll like
Speaker 1: action set piece, action set piece, and then fuck fuck
Speaker 1: fuck throughout the timeline they're like, okay, guys, we gotta
Speaker 1: fill in the rest.
Speaker 2: That's pretty much what happened here. Wow, pretty much. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I'm not even talking about like worst written movie of
Speaker 2: the year. It's one of the worst movies, written movies
Speaker 2: of the decade, of all time, of the millennium. Again,
Speaker 2: I agree with you. Madam Webb is worse. Don't get
Speaker 2: me wrong. The characters in Madam Webb do so many
Speaker 2: incredibly dumb things that isn't quite present here. They just
Speaker 2: talk stupid here. This movie is more like what the
Speaker 2: characters are saying is written again by a child. So
Speaker 2: the overall plot isn't as dumb as something like Madam Webb,
Speaker 2: but the in between shit, Yes, maybe worse. It's awful.
Speaker 2: Aaron Taylor Johnson is Aaron Taylor Johnson. I really don't
Speaker 2: have too many issues with things he did, but everything
Speaker 2: else in this movie is bad. Arianna Debosa's Clipso is
Speaker 2: fucking terrible. Every single thing that's even involving her is terrible.
Speaker 2: The new spin on the House.
Speaker 1: Stop blaming her, stop bringing up her name, Just bring
Speaker 1: up the character's name and blame the writers for it.
Speaker 1: I don't think no one could have done it. You
Speaker 1: could add Meryl Street play fucking Calypso and it wouldn't matter.
Speaker 2: Russell crowz here guz so how about that? Uh? I
Speaker 2: have it at twelve hot Dogs in honor of how
Speaker 2: many abs Aaron Taylor Johnson shows us in this movie.
Speaker 2: It's my second worst movie of twenty twenty four. Only
Speaker 2: Madam Webb is below this. But good riddance, right, good
Speaker 2: riddance to the Sony Spider Man in universe something unpredictable,
Speaker 2: but in the end there's right. I hope you had
Speaker 2: the time of your life. Fucking put a bullet either
Speaker 2: in my brain or whoever is creating these movies' brains.
Speaker 2: This is like, like at least the last Venom movie,
Speaker 2: there's some like fun to be had. There's all sorts
Speaker 2: of suits and powers. This movie is so devoid of fun,
Speaker 2: like it just sucked the will to live out of me,
Speaker 2: Like it's it just truly put a stamp on the
Speaker 2: end of this fucking universe.
Speaker 1: You know who you couldn't put a bullet into. Spoilers
Speaker 1: spoiler spoilers. The Rhino but you know what you could do.
Speaker 1: You could death star them and then foss at him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so he has this one glaring weakness. He's gonna
Speaker 2: put his fucking.
Speaker 1: He's gonna giant hole. You can put your finger into.
Speaker 2: His hole, into his abdomen. So I that was pretty glaring.
Speaker 2: You knew that was gonna play up. But so yeah,
Speaker 2: the way he goes out is dumb, obviously, But the
Speaker 2: characters at that point you don't even care what happens
Speaker 2: to them.
Speaker 1: He gets hit by trucks, he gets blasted by guns,
Speaker 1: and then what happens wilderbeast.
Speaker 2: I have some things here. So one of the laugh
Speaker 2: out loud moments is when you think that Craven is
Speaker 2: about to die at the hands of the Foreigner, and
Speaker 2: then Clipso he's counting, goes one, two, as he does
Speaker 2: in the movie, and then Clipso goes three and shoots
Speaker 2: him in the face with it with an arrow.
Speaker 1: She foreshadowed, you said, the writing sucks. They foreshadowed with
Speaker 1: the writing that she had used a bow and arrow before.
Speaker 2: Somehow goo Yes, we find out in this movie that
Speaker 2: Craven's mom went nuts. And one of the big reveals
Speaker 2: in this movie is that she went nuts because of
Speaker 2: spy spiders drove her insane. And this is also somehow
Speaker 2: Craven's biggest fear.
Speaker 1: That was the time. And I'm not saying don't introduce
Speaker 1: Spider Man. Let's go all out, let's get fucking nuts.
Speaker 1: Introduce Madam Webb into this movie, or introduce Madam Webb's
Speaker 1: mom who went to the jungle to study spiders.
Speaker 2: No, give me a Wild West spider. How about that?
Speaker 1: What is it?
Speaker 2: Give me a big wild Wild West spider?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's even better. Have a giant mechanical
Speaker 1: spider in here. And will Smith Popson as well.
Speaker 2: The major easter egg we get in here at Goou
Speaker 2: is the doctor in New York that turns rhino into
Speaker 2: rhino and ultimately turns Chamellion into chameleon, which again the
Speaker 2: Chameleon CGI at the end was fucking terrible. Is Mike
Speaker 2: Warren or Miles Warren aka the Jackal, who was also
Speaker 2: another character in comic books. No one cares about that.
Speaker 2: I had a real issue, and again the writing spad
Speaker 2: but I had a real issue. What do we get
Speaker 2: a time jump of what like ten years in this movie?
Speaker 2: So the cram when they go on that hunting trip
Speaker 2: with their father in Africa. Meet the guy that plays
Speaker 2: Rhino eventually turns into the Rhino, and it's not like
Speaker 2: they're six years old and wouldn't remember this fellow. He
Speaker 2: looks exactly the same, and they're like, they would have
Speaker 2: clearly remembered who the fuck.
Speaker 1: Let me stop you right there. That was the day
Speaker 1: that Craven was attacked by a lion. I feel like
Speaker 1: that would have been the focus of my day. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have remembered this weak men who was not strong
Speaker 1: enough to be like my father.
Speaker 2: So cut to the ten year time jump right, alexi
Speaker 2: Aka of the Rhino and his men kidnap Dmitri. Serget
Speaker 2: was not in the building. They kidnapped Dmitri, and Dmitri's like, oh,
Speaker 2: I don't remember you. I don't know who you.
Speaker 1: Are because his brother was attacked by a lion on
Speaker 1: that day. That would be the tenth pole moment of
Speaker 1: that day for me.
Speaker 2: Rhino says in response to I don't remember you. You
Speaker 2: wouldn't my hair was different. Then there's a good.
Speaker 1: Joke in the movie. Don't you snivel at their jokes
Speaker 1: at me?
Speaker 2: And my three friends were laughing. We had a good
Speaker 2: old time at that point. Dude, this movie is so bad.
Speaker 2: There's no post credits, is nothing. This universe is dead hopefully.
Speaker 2: I just I'm glad it's over.
Speaker 1: Fourteen hot dogs. Fourteen hot dogs. I forgot this. Thank
Speaker 1: you for bringing this up. No post credits scene. Don't
Speaker 1: get me wrong, I had to sit through the credits anyways,
Speaker 1: but there were no post credit scenes. Thumbs up, fourteen
Speaker 1: hot dogs.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, I'm still at twelve. This movie is fucking terrible,
Speaker 2: but somehow still better than Madam Webb.
Speaker 1: Good. Let's get into Mac Sack and mack Sack could
Speaker 1: be anything. It could be a boat, and this week,
Speaker 1: since we just got Craven that it could be the
Speaker 1: last of the spam movies, the Sony Pictures in association
Speaker 1: with Marvel, which is still the funniest logo ever where
Speaker 1: they put Marvel up first and then very small in
Speaker 1: association with I will ask you Mac to please rank
Speaker 1: the six live action shitty movies.
Speaker 2: So once again, there was a plane at some point
Speaker 2: a decade ago to tie this into the Garfield movies.
Speaker 2: They never did that and instead we got this, So
Speaker 2: we get Venom twenty eighteen, Venom Let Their Big Connage
Speaker 2: twenty twenty one, Morbius twenty twenty two, and then we
Speaker 2: got three this year, Madam Webb. Venom, The Last Dance
Speaker 2: in Craven the Hunter to me, head and shoulders above
Speaker 2: everything else in this universe is the first Venom movie.
Speaker 2: I think I gave it thirty originally might be down
Speaker 2: a couple of dogs, but still head and shoulders above
Speaker 2: everything else in this universe. Then I think we have
Speaker 2: a second or middle tier, where you have Morbius and
Speaker 2: the two Venom sequels that are they exist. There's some good,
Speaker 2: there's some bad. Well, Morbias is just kind of there.
Speaker 1: No Morbius brought the Vulture into this universe and then
Speaker 1: destroyed them because now we can't come back to.
Speaker 2: Those movies are not good. They're not as bad as
Speaker 2: the two terrible movies in this universe, Web and Craven.
Speaker 2: Actually you could even have them in their own tiers.
Speaker 2: But these two movies, to me, are so far below
Speaker 2: even those shitty movies of Morbius, The Last Dance and
Speaker 2: Let There Be Carne. It's like I just I can't,
Speaker 2: I cannot believe that three of these movies came out
Speaker 2: this year, and two of them are two of the
Speaker 2: worst movies I've ever seen.
Speaker 1: And you know what, they should have really leaned in
Speaker 1: on a post credit scene of Michael Keaton showing up
Speaker 1: and being like, how the fuck do I keep showing
Speaker 1: up in these things? Like let them swear and make
Speaker 1: a joke?
Speaker 2: I just like, because this movie is so boring and
Speaker 2: so forgettable, I'm not gonna remember it in the pantheon
Speaker 2: of all time bad movies like I will Madam Webb,
Speaker 2: but it deserves mentioned. It definitely deserves mention. This movie
Speaker 2: is fucking tremendously bad.
Speaker 1: Okay, so if I'm gonna make my tears at the top,
Speaker 1: the most rewatchable, best movie of the bunch is Madam Webb.
Speaker 1: I love that movie. Nothing in this universe even comes
Speaker 1: close to making me want to watch again, So no
Speaker 1: thank you to that. I would then Venom of like
Speaker 1: it's a cromulent movie. It's not great. It definitely has
Speaker 1: a lot of holes. It really does need Spider Man
Speaker 1: for a for an origin story for Venom, but it's
Speaker 1: it's It's Goovy Goo, so how could Goo pass up
Speaker 1: on that? Then I would put the last Dance after that,
Speaker 1: because we're just getting into a pile of shit. Now.
Speaker 1: Last Dance had fifteen minutes that I enjoyed of him
Speaker 1: doing a buddy cop road trip through Vegas. I would
Speaker 1: take that. Then I go with let there Be Carnage,
Speaker 1: and keep this in mind. Let there Be Carnage, I
Speaker 1: think is the loudest movie of all time, and I
Speaker 1: do not. I just I don't like it, but here
Speaker 1: we are sure. Then I go Morbius because Morbius is bland, boring,
Speaker 1: but Jared Leto walked with crutches off the set just
Speaker 1: to try to be like this character and annoyed the
Speaker 1: entire crew by doing it. And then we go to Craven,
Speaker 1: the Hunter that I believe has nothing to offer.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't agree with you. Looking forward, if this
Speaker 2: universe does somehow still exist going forward, you still have
Speaker 2: that third Spider Verse movie. Really interesting thing here, So
Speaker 2: they are still making the Spider Noir series, starting the
Speaker 2: Cage that's gonna be coming to MGM. Plus why the
Speaker 2: fuck are they that no one has that? Like that?
Speaker 2: That is so fucking annoying? Like what like yet again,
Speaker 2: let's make yet another bad decision, Like how the fuck
Speaker 2: does that end up on MGM plus like where else
Speaker 2: would over like? And Sony has built up so much
Speaker 2: goodwill with the video games in the PlayStation.
Speaker 1: You paused for too long there first, I'm like, where
Speaker 1: is this good will coming from?
Speaker 2: And even the two Garfield movies I like more than
Speaker 2: most people. And obviously you have the original Reimi movies,
Speaker 2: but holy shit, if they are they fucking shooting themselves
Speaker 2: in the foot with these movies. Just just quit it.
Speaker 2: Just quit it. Let let Marvel do their thing, let
Speaker 2: the MCU do their thing, and just reap some of
Speaker 2: the benefits from that. You don't need to do your
Speaker 2: own thing.
Speaker 1: Oh. I introduced my son to the Spider Man game
Speaker 1: that came out for the PS four and then remastered
Speaker 1: for PS five, and god damn it does it look good.
Speaker 2: It's so fun.
Speaker 1: It's so fun. There was a bit too many restrictions
Speaker 1: on it at the beginning for him, because he just
Speaker 1: wanted to swing around New York. He's four years old.
Speaker 1: He just wanted to go to Times Square, he wanted
Speaker 1: to go to the Zoo, but he had to go
Speaker 1: on a mission. He didn't want to go on a mission. Luckily,
Speaker 1: Astro Boy is free on the PS five and astrobought sorry.
Speaker 1: He had the time of his life for the next
Speaker 1: three hours.
Speaker 2: There's a second game too. Where are you playing? The
Speaker 2: first of the second game?
Speaker 1: The whicheveryone's free on the system.
Speaker 2: There's two astroboch games. Yeah, they came out with the
Speaker 2: second one. So the second one?
Speaker 1: What where is that?
Speaker 2: There's two games? Is it also I think the first
Speaker 2: one came out with PS four?
Speaker 1: Maybe is it also free?
Speaker 2: Yeah? They're all free. They're all free all the time.
Speaker 2: My god, the second one. So I was watching. My
Speaker 2: nephew played the other who's five a year old than Raffi.
Speaker 2: He loves Astrobot loves it, and he's at which I'm
Speaker 2: sure at Rafi will be at in a year. I
Speaker 2: watched him play Spider Man two. He doesn't look up
Speaker 2: or look down. He's playing like it's intuitive for him.
Speaker 2: He can actually play the game, which blows my mind.
Speaker 1: As opposed to me where I'm looking down and using
Speaker 1: my fingers like this and pointing like that like I'm
Speaker 1: trying to type something. Dear Sony, I did not like
Speaker 1: your movie Crave. No, it's Craven with a K.
Speaker 2: I don't know why. I'm so upset with this movie
Speaker 2: because I shouldn't have expected it to be good. But
Speaker 2: I guess them holding back stuff from us and me
Speaker 2: loving Aaron Taylor Johnson set my expectations, I guess way
Speaker 2: too like expecting a twenty four dog movie was apparently
Speaker 2: way too fucking high for this.
Speaker 1: I think what I'm most upset about is that there
Speaker 1: are more movies coming out now, like movies around Christmas
Speaker 1: time where I need to tell my or ask my wife.
Speaker 1: I'm like, hey, there's a movie coming out, there's a
Speaker 1: screening coming out. I would like to go and see it,
Speaker 1: and then she'd be like, well, you went to that
Speaker 1: one two weeks ago, and I'm like, fuck, I wasted
Speaker 1: my screening on Morbius. I wasted my away time on Morbius.
Speaker 2: You also, just to throw an adendum on this whole thing,
Speaker 2: you wouldn't shut the fuck up about Hot frost the
Speaker 2: other day, so I watched it. Oh, how was it
Speaker 2: better than this movie?
Speaker 1: You would take? Actually, I have Hot Frosty above it too.
Speaker 1: Did you laugh at anything?
Speaker 2: I That movie's fucking terrible too, But at least that
Speaker 2: movie is bad in the way Netflix movie should be bad.
Speaker 1: But didn't you feel bad seeing all of our forgotten
Speaker 1: heroes of sitcom pasted up on screen like pulling teeth
Speaker 1: trying to make you laugh, and none of them are funny.
Speaker 2: Pushed it up a little bit over this, as you
Speaker 2: have notable actors trying a little bit. You also fucking
Speaker 2: lied to meet. Craig Robinson plays keyboard like ten minutes
Speaker 2: into the movie.
Speaker 1: I drove by Max House the day after that, and
Speaker 1: he he had snow on his front lawn and he's
Speaker 1: tried making this real big booty snowman to come to life,
Speaker 1: theme to life, this giant rack of a snowman.
Speaker 2: I will say. I think it's because she does thirty
Speaker 2: five Hallmark movies a year. Lacyshebert looks tired not to
Speaker 2: bring someone down.
Speaker 1: Have you seen the Lindsay Lohan one yet?
Speaker 2: I have not. Did you see the nod? Did you
Speaker 2: see the nod to that movie? In this movie? No,
Speaker 2: She's like, oh, that looks like a girl I went
Speaker 2: to high school with.
Speaker 1: I think that you would actually like that movie, Okay,
Speaker 1: because you're stupid.
Speaker 2: Well that's true, all right? Mac.
Speaker 1: Where can the people find us?
Speaker 2: You can find us on Twitter and on Instagram. At
Speaker 2: Mac and gooo podcast. Every other platform we are Mac
Speaker 2: Ampersango that's max Shift seven Goo That includes Facebook, Stitcher tuning,
Speaker 2: and Cashbucks pre Google Play, I Art Radio. We were
Speaker 2: on Spotify, but more importantly we're on Apple Podcast. Get
Speaker 2: on their rate review subscribe five stars. If you do that,
Speaker 2: we'll get you a free Mac and Goo T shirt
Speaker 2: from the folks over at Watertown sports Where. That's Watertown
Speaker 2: Sports Where thirty four mod Auburn Street in Watertown, Watertownsportswar
Speaker 2: dot com expert screenprinting and embroidery.
Speaker 1: Teapublic dot Com. Merged Still time to buy Merged. I
Speaker 1: think you can still get it before Christmas. Don't quote me,
Speaker 1: but just go buy stuff. Who cares. That's what the
Speaker 1: holidays are all about. Buy yourself stuff. Check us out
Speaker 1: at the end of the week for news dump. We
Speaker 1: have tons of Chris Ever coming back, we have Superman trailer.
Speaker 1: There's a lot that's gonna be happening before the end
Speaker 1: of the week, so please join us. Then then I
Speaker 1: don't know what we're gonna do after that. Next week
Speaker 1: is Christmas, but it's in the middle of the week
Speaker 1: so it shouldn't affect our schedule too much.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll have Yeah, maybe it'll be a double double
Speaker 2: box thumbs up, mago weeek. I don't know. We've got
Speaker 2: movies in the pipeline here, we might Is there screen tonight?
Speaker 1: But I already told you that I've wasted my screening
Speaker 1: time on Craven, so I'm not allowed to see any
Speaker 1: more movies this year.
Speaker 2: I know, and I've missed like three of four. So
Speaker 2: now I'm itching to get to a screen. So we're
Speaker 2: on op.
Speaker 1: So there is a screening today. It's for Sonic three,
Speaker 1: but we or I can't make it because it starts
Speaker 1: at five.
Speaker 2: Oh that is frustrating. Yeah, but that might mean less?
Speaker 2: Is it with real people?
Speaker 1: I don't know right what is that? It doesn't help
Speaker 1: me at all. I wanted to bring my son. My
Speaker 1: son loves Sonic. Tuesdays are goosdays. I abuse Kangaroos tea.
Speaker 2: Please flip the cassette over to side B to continue
Speaker 2: the adventure.
Speaker 1: Now it's time for girls jumping on trampolines.