Speaker 1: When your old career gives you lemons. Throwing some ice,
mixing some vodka in color. A podcast from the Mac
of All Trade Studio in Fairport and driven by Victor
Chrysler Dots Jeep Ram. It's Billified, the Bill Moran Podcast.
Speaker 2: Well, hello and welcome. Thanks for getting your pot on,
Thank you for telling.
Speaker 3: A friend, and so we spread the word speaking about
a friend. Dougie Fresh in the house, Whoo Manders going
on hit, shake your money, make guitar power man with
you our twenty four seven Dougie Fresh, I'm armed and
ready to go, buddy, talk up, shut up, and ready
to go, cock locking, ready to drop.
Speaker 2: Doug is a forty nine Ers fan. I am, And
uh when did they play?
Speaker 3: They're playing tomorrow after the Buffalo Bill's four o'clock in Philadelphia.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a tough game. That's a tough game. I
I don't know. Did you throw anything at your TV
after the loss? You sent me a picture of some
things you were drinking.
Speaker 3: After we just looked. I hated those jerseys. I'm very superstitious, okay,
and I'm looking at these ugly things. I'm like, we're
not going to fucking one to day. You already know,
you already have a feeling. I mean we helped kind
of tight. We had some drops. So I think we
can win this game even though we're so injured. We're
still we're twelve and four for crying out loud, right right,
I understand, Yeah, I mean yes, I believe that there's
a chance that they could when Trent Williams coming back,
Ricky Parcel Pearcell so and I think they want revenge
from a couple of years ago when they lost in
the NFC Championship game. Yeah, pretty got hurt. We were
upset and nothing and then he.
Speaker 2: So, I will say that this is being taped on
a Saturday, so by the time people here and I
I don't know if it's going to drop for Monday
or for Tuesday yet. There's just some things going on,
but you know it's always good. Now, I would say
that that you didn't get sick to like your stomach.
You know you're so angry. I don't know how passionate
you get with these games.
Speaker 3: When it gets to playoff times, I can get pretty
passionate and screaming changing jerseys.
Speaker 2: You watch alone at home or do you like to
be with other people.
Speaker 3: Well, I like to watch alone alone at home. Okay,
I mean sometimes I've had my sister over before, but
sometimes I excessively swear, and that's when I'm drinking. I've
been drinking lately, so I might.
Speaker 2: Be haven't been drinking now, you know what is lately? Dog?
I mean, come on, you lasked eight months. But yeah,
both fucking shit. I just doug don't have the urge,
for whatever reason, to drink alcohol. Yeah, but I thought
you were drinking. I thought you got all banged up.
Speaker 3: The Yeah that was one night in November, one night
in October, so not even once a month. Oh yeah, nothing,
but you were drinking. But hang on a second, you
send me pictures of you drinking. Drink it was one beer,
you know what. I had a sip of that and
I tossed it out. I try to Are you lying
to me? No? Really? Yeah? Wow? Just didn't taste good,
is it? Uh?
Speaker 2: And this has nothing to do with like wanting to
get in shape or anything like that. Doesn't taste good?
Speaker 3: The dirty martini didn't taste really good. That I wasn't
in that mood to drink. I haven't been. I just
you know, interesting, Yeah, I mean, I've been driving uber
every day, so I know if I drink, I can't
really drive the next day. I got you, you know,
even if you have a little alcohol. So for Sarah
and I mean I and I'm dog sitting this weekend. Yeah,
so I won't go out and drink. No if anything
hands the dogs and I'm drunk, you know, that's not
good to tell the owners. So well, one of these
days I'll get you know.
Speaker 2: But I just I like this side of you. I
think it's a honestly, I think it's it's a it's
a good help. You talk about wanting to get in
shape and to do those things, and I too, have
been really trying to focus my firts to what do
they call it, changing your lifestyle? Yeah, yeah, I mean
I've been.
Speaker 3: The new Year, the new resolution, I.
Speaker 2: Know, and I hate that.
Speaker 3: I am.
Speaker 2: I kind of hate that myself. I've been on a
path since the fall of last year, Like you know,
when I started the graduate program, all that everything was
starting to shift a little in my life and change things.
And uh it's continued into the new year, and uh,
I don't know, I feel like I have a little
more clarity. I started taking fiber metamucil. After my we
had the memorial service for my dad. I woke up
extremely hungover and tired, and my brother goes, try this,
and then he comes down later on and you you
literally what comes out of you is incredible.
Speaker 3: I mean it is.
Speaker 2: It's the size of tugboat rope, you know what I mean,
Like you could pull a fucking ship down to the Genesee.
Speaker 3: Does that help you lose weight? I mean, well it should, right,
it should. You're not dropping five pounds on the toilet.
Speaker 2: Oh I would love to weigh this stuff because I
and I I agree you're not. But uh so then
somebody tells me Danny on the podcast has this app
that looks like that the Health of Everything, and he's like,
you'd be better off taking just the fiber one. No,
not the metal musical with the flavoring. So I switched
to that. And the other day I had a I
had a very serious problem, like serious problem.
Speaker 3: Uh you're gonnat poop.
Speaker 2: Uh sorry, I'll watch it. Yeah, yeah, so I go,
I can't stop going, Doug. It's not stopping. It's all
twenty minutes of a Hershey factory. It's building up, building up, and.
Speaker 3: I like food poisoning. I know.
Speaker 2: No, it's just that it's just just a fiber working through.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and see I won't take this stuff because if
I go ubering, all right, we'll pulling over.
Speaker 3: And I've had to pull over with customers. I'm like, hey,
we're pulling over. I'm a real Oh yeah, wait, come on,
I had a piece so bad.
Speaker 2: Stop it.
Speaker 3: I'm like, sir, stop it, man, man, I gotta pull over.
And uh I got to use the restaurant. And I
left the car running with the guy in the back
and this phone. He's an older gentleman. I'm like, he's
not gonna carjacky, he's not gonna drive well. But uh yeah,
now what did you do?
Speaker 2: Just on the side of the road.
Speaker 3: Go. I have done that before I went. I dropped
somebody off. The other day in Henrietta there was garbage bins,
you know, so I threw out my garbage. I gotta
go so it doesn't happen all the time.
Speaker 2: But no, when it does, it does.
Speaker 3: I have go ahead with your your story though, what
why I'm heeing? So?
Speaker 2: I like, I like a nicer toilet paper, I like
a thicker continal I got a dollar store. I know,
that's fine. Everybody has their own choice. I'm not whatever.
I'm mopping up. I'm mopping up, Doug. This is like
I'm fucking mopping.
Speaker 3: I got it.
Speaker 2: I got it after the first mopping. I don't need
the visual you're mopping. Do you need one of those
bi days in your My sister has one. Yeah, my
sister has clean your mud whistle. My sister has one
of these magic toilets that it practically says hello. When
you walk in the room, it lowers the seat for you.
The seat is warm, it's heated. Then you sit down.
Speaker 3: Does she have a TV in the bathroom? No, oh wow,
she sucks. Bring your phone.
Speaker 2: Bring your phone the phone, it's fine. I think I
spent almost forty minutes in there one morning.
Speaker 4: No, I'm watching Disney.
Speaker 3: I'll be right out. It's my favorite.
Speaker 2: So I end up clogging the toilet basically basically because
of the toilet paper.
Speaker 3: Okay, so don't you flush mid um? No, you have to.
Speaker 2: I'm starting to learn this. I am starting to learn this.
I yes, yes, it's a thing that I haven't had.
Speaker 3: To do all just for that reason. Yeah, you know.
So now, Jerry Seinfeld joke time. He goes, you've ever
been in a party flusher toilet and the water starts right? Y? Yeah,
he goes, this is the most scariest your life. It is.
It's absolutely true.
Speaker 2: So and and the problem is when it starts rising,
it's only going to go to a certain level. It
is built to not overflow the toilet unless unless you
flush again, right, and this is where idiots will go.
Speaker 3: Right, So that's help, it is not. So.
Speaker 2: I am looking around. I had I had a plunger. Okay,
I can't find the plunger. No, I don't know where
it is anywhere at all. So I decide, fuck this,
And I get to remember the old plastic bags that
they used to give you your groceries. Yeah, yeah, they
don't have him anymore. Somebody gave me Kevin when he
was his mom passed. She had a box of them.
I double bag and I go in. I'm elbow deep
trying to see if I.
Speaker 3: Try to get some pressure, get the clog.
Speaker 2: Out of there, if I want to see if there's
anything there that I can reach and even pull out. Nothing,
but I try the suction thing. I mean, I'm fisting
my toilet.
Speaker 3: Did you spin on it first, you like that bitch
sol in the rim like a margarita.
Speaker 2: And now the water has already been flushed and it's there,
and I'm thinking maybe if I flush it it'll push.
Now that I've done some stuff so it'll get through.
Speaker 3: That's when you need patience and let it go down
on a stone.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it wasn't happening. It wasn't so I, but I
know what could happen. So I build like an absorption,
A damn no, an absorption all around the toilet. I
lay down towels all around the toilet, and the flush
again and they're not. Yeah, and up and over we go.
Fuck and luckily the one floater is just kind of
hanging out.
Speaker 3: What I I just once it in the center. It's
in the center.
Speaker 2: So I take my son. We go to the to
the y MCA, and we're there for like an hour
or so or whatever. We come back.
Speaker 3: You not buy a plunger.
Speaker 2: I on my way back, I go and I buy.
I made stops at Wegman's and then I went to
Ace Hardware. I got myself a really nice plunger. I'm
all set, and I'm thinking, maybe the water's gone down.
Oh no, it's right there at the rim. I mean
it is just you ever pour your coffee in the
morning or any kind of beverage, is right, it's just
a little moniscous over right. Yeah, so that's what the
water's doing. And then I plunged it one time and
I just went but what a fucking mess, right, what
a gross mess. I'm thinking that I and I know,
and I knew telling.
Speaker 3: The story to you, we gros out, Yes, yeah, but
we had better things to talk about than I just
backed up toilet. I'm misting your toilet. Yeah, but here's
the wood chipper was working.
Speaker 2: I want to know. I want to know. I'm telling you,
just try it.
Speaker 3: Just trusting a wood chipper. No, no, no, no, taking
the metal musil or whatever. See what happens. Why I'm
not gonna get caught ubering.
Speaker 2: Well, you gotta time it. Do it on a day
you're going to be home. Take it early in the morning.
See what happens. No, Now I have to think you're
you're a man who has been out in the public
for a long time. Yes, you have been a DJ
at a gentleman's clubs. You have been an uber driver,
certainly a bartender. I want to know because I was
thinking about this and then I had to look up
some things, and I just thought, this is funny because
Doug does not like gross, but I was wondering, what
is the most bizarre and grossest behavior you've ever seen
people do in public?
Speaker 3: Now?
Speaker 2: I mean, look, you're driving all over the place. You
got to notice things.
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, I think I caught somebody driving by duffecating
in public. Homeless guy.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, yeah, and that's just yeah. I heard a
great story about some guy.
Speaker 3: I saw somebody pissing on the street once in California.
I mean, me and my buddy were walking right by him.
He's like, this place is just so disgusted in the
city and this guy was just pissing on his bicycle.
I'm like, oh, you mean, like this guy right there
and he jumped. He couldn't believe it. I could. I
wasn't startled, and I had not that. We had a
woman and her child walk up to me and say,
can you give me money so I can feed my child?
And that's kind of disturbing. And that was the first
two three weeks I was there. Yeah, so but shocking,
like I have to think a little more about that,
because I saw pit bull go after another dog. WHOA, yeah,
that's sah. Yeah, they were just the dogs were just sniffing.
I'm like, oh, that's nice. I was on Monroe and
I went into a gas station, turned around for another
uber ride, and by the time I turned around, no
more than twenty seconds, the pit bull was on the dog,
and I mean on the dog and people trying to
get the pit bull off. And if you ever have
that happened to you, I think what you're supposed to
do is grab the dog's ears and squeeze really hard
and that will open him up. Oh I didn't know that. Yeah,
I did not know and pull back. I would have
thought punched him in the nose, But I don't also
want to punch the dog in the nose. You missed
the dog, your hand goes in and then just you're
fisting the dog instead of your toilet.
Speaker 2: I uh, I uh. I'm just thinking you had to
see some as somebody said this was a story, and
I can't tell if it was real or not.
Speaker 3: It was a story.
Speaker 2: I heard. Some guy said that his wife went out
with some girlfriends and she came she got so drunk.
He had to go pick her up, and she was
so so so drunk that in the car she started
like vomiting and then uh, you know, she she got
home and she's like practically wet her pants and just
a mess. The mess. He was so mad that he
and he knew she was not gonna remember a lot
of this and all he went out and he ship
next to her front.
Speaker 3: Door of her car.
Speaker 2: So when she walked out in the morning, that's what
she was greeted with. And she goes, oh my god,
did I do that?
Speaker 3: Yes? I can't believe that this is real. But I
enjoyed the story. I enjoyed the story. I'm just telling
That's fine. Yeah, people enjoy different things. Well, you wouldn't
enjoy that story. No, oh my god, because I had
somebody throw up in my car and I know the
cleanup of the mask.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, that's that's not the first sitting as a revenge,
I thought was wonderful outside.
Speaker 3: You're gonna gonna defecate. I used to when I was
in your own driveway next to your car. And does
the story end? Is she cleaned everything out? Yes, she
cleaned up, Okay everything did the poop he cleaned out
the pup the night before. I think she got it better.
It's like cleaning up dog crab.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she did get it better.
Speaker 3: Oh, I agree with that.
Speaker 2: I agree with that. He's still But I used to
climb a tree when I was a kid, and that's
how bombs Away started. I would pretend to be a
bird in the w and I would take a ship.
When I really had a shit, I would climbent tree
and take a ship. My funds were all laughing, and
so then we decided could I hit a certain target.
And then in high school we used to I used
to climb to the top in this one bathroom, the
top of all the stalls, and I would kind of
put legs on each side and I would try to shit.
Speaker 3: Into the toilet.
Speaker 2: It's called bombs away.
Speaker 3: Bombs away. Yeah, well I never thought about that.
Speaker 2: But you've heard boring.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry. I know. I just DJ strip clubs and drink.
I know, I know, you God, but you know what this?
Uh yeah, we were the big brother here in going
through reels, there is I have seen a history of
toilet paper and how people took care of poop. I
mean the old outhouse with a half moon at it. Yeah,
but in ancient times they would dig like thirty feet
forty feet down, sure, so the smell wouldn't come out.
In the medieval times they would use a rope. Mm hmmm,
so they would pull a rope to wipe themselves.
Speaker 4: Oh yoa oh, yes, you can look it up.
Speaker 2: This is not I'm not joking about it. I invention
of toilet paper.
Speaker 3: Well, now, I think a very very small percentage of
the world actually uses toilet paper that we should look
up to.
Speaker 2: I don't know, but I think a small percentage of
the world does really Yeah, well everywhere else it's sticky buns,
my friend, I don't know. I saw an otherwise normal
looking guy, this person wrote on Big Brother, as you
call it, stick his finger in a half dried puddle
of pink goo on the sidewalk and taste it. He
looked right at me and realized I'd witness it. I
almost got whiplash, turning my head away. Why, I don't know.
Here's one that you could relate to. I used to
work for a shoe company a couple of years ago.
One busy Saturday, I had a guy in his thirties
come in and ask for my help with something. He
very quickly sat down, took off his shoes and socks
in the middle of the shop, and then asked me
to inspect the massive blisters all over his feet.
Speaker 3: That's disgusting, and he wanted to tell me.
Speaker 2: He wanted me to tell him if I thought they
looked okay, or if he should go see a doctor.
It took all my self control not to throw up
then and there. When I asked him why he came
to us instead of going straight to a doctor, he
replied with something like, you guys work with shoes all day,
so I figured you know all about foot problems too.
Speaker 3: Yes, of course we would.
Speaker 2: How about when people turn you now, you have got
to be honest with this, of course. Okay, you're driving around,
driving around. Have you ever seen someone turn themselves into
a human appetizer? In other words, they're eating nails, they're
picking their nose, they're doing anything.
Speaker 3: No.
Speaker 2: I once saw a mom in an airport with a
baby that had like a really running nose, and she
I almost threw up. She put her mouth over the
nose and sucked.
Speaker 3: I've never even heard of that. I'm just telling you.
Speaker 2: I saw it.
Speaker 3: I just thought you see these good ones for when
I come in. Yeah, of course, okay, I do this
is let's not talk about NFL cheerleaders or anything like that.
Oh no, to my toilet. She's sucking the kids. Cool.
This guy is eating your crap and they got a
floater and he's coming in with blisters all over his feet.
I'm like, oh, yeah, I'm doing the I'm gonna prepare
everything next time.
Speaker 2: No, you're not.
Speaker 3: I am.
Speaker 2: Oh, You're fine.
Speaker 3: I'll be like uh Jay Leno on the Tonight Show
with Johnny Carson. You have a guy spot could be
Dougie Fresher five.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm sorry that. I just thought it was interesting.
You're a man around. I figured for sure you you made.
Speaker 3: Me worldly, but not like that. I don't make me mental.
I want to forget stuff like that. I want happiness
in my head. Yeah my brain. I get a good
laugh out of that, I know, I do. I get it.
I get a good hanging like a chimpanzee trying to
hit ship on a certain spot. I just you know,
it was a kid. I was a kid. If you
could do it now, you would, if there was if
there was stalls in there, you would have to show.
You would take one of the you would take one
of these sessions. You might not take the video, but
you would take the microphone. I am not here.
Speaker 2: Come, I'm not flexible, not flexible enough.
Speaker 3: You know. That's the problem. That's the problem.
Speaker 2: All right, Doug, we'll take a moment. There's something a
little sad that has happened in our area. Something's been canceled, canceled,
and I'm not sure how you're gonna feel about it.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, but we'll get to that right after this.
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Speaker 3: It is session number two. You lucky listeners, you got
the one, the only hipshaking money.
Speaker 5: Make a tower power Tuckie Freshman house next to me
six foot two, and as do Bill Moray.
Speaker 6: He never knows what's coming. That was a short opening
end that when I know, I know, but there's there's
you don't know what's coming. I don't tell you. Hey,
I'm going to do the song. I just and I
get such a.
Speaker 2: Check out of it I do. I'm sorry, all right now,
I didn't mean to groscyal. I know, and uh well
I did. I mean, I knew, I knew what I
was doing.
Speaker 3: But what what? What did you want to bring up?
Is there anything you want to bring up before I
bring up the cancelation? Is there anything that's bothering you
in the world.
Speaker 2: Everything, Okay, what's bothered?
Speaker 3: You just just I can't even say. I just it's
just everybody, how we interact as a society. It's just
getting crazy. It's getting crazier.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I got I hear you.
Speaker 3: I hear you. But you know what, I was just thinking.
I don't know what you were thinking with the introductions.
I should You're like, you can make money off of this.
I believe you can. I think Uh, I can put
my voice in an MPEG empty PEG yeah, sure, peg. Yeah,
and I can introduce your wedding. So even if you
give me the list of can you just sent an
MP three and I just sent an three right, that's here,
we could do.
Speaker 2: It out of here.
Speaker 3: Absolutely absolutely, I love it.
Speaker 2: Do you let me know? And uh, you get him
in enough time, we knock him out. You can do
to my buddy to make a website? Yeah, yeah, Tucky
Fresh Yeah, I mean, but you could do it an
intro for anything anything? Now, what if it was an
intro for a funeral?
Speaker 3: Could you do it? Yes? Yeah, here he comes. He's
the last one in. He said he'd be late to
his own his own funeral, and he was right. He
got six pall bears. I used that seven children, seventeen grandchildren,
Ladies and gentlemen laying down on the job for the
last time. Kenny Beacon. It's it's so uncomfortable.
Speaker 2: It's so uncomfortable.
Speaker 3: I don't think I have.
Speaker 2: I wish we had a better way.
Speaker 3: There's a background, nois there's for a celebration of life, yes.
Speaker 2: But I I and it may be yeah, it may
be better for celebration of life, like where things are
a little lighter.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 2: My father wanted both the church and the other. So
I I don't know, but I would tell you like
it's I wish we had a better And this is
gonna sound really strange, but as a society, a better relationship.
Speaker 3: With death, well, isn't hold trying to make it allowed
if you want to die.
Speaker 2: Fuck, I didn't know this, Yeah, to make it, you
know what. I'm all for it, I really am, instead
of suffering. Yes, and somebody adding.
Speaker 3: Up and adding up medical bills, taking care of.
Speaker 2: Anybody who's ever yeah, anybody who's ever worked in hospice.
You are angels. They are wonderful hospice. They do such wonderful,
wonderful things. But at the same time when somebody's kind
of lingering and they're in this and I and I've
met people ubering. Now my mom went kind of quick.
She was on a downhill for a year.
Speaker 3: I mean, yeah, but she was living by herself and
but the end it was quick. But uh, sometimes taking
people to airport. Over past six years of driving, meet
people you going to the airport. Yeah, I'm going back
to Colorado. Oh what are you doing in town? I'm
taking care of my mom. And yeah, well that's too bad. Yeah,
she's just going downhill. And I have two brothers here
and I fly in when I can, and they have
family and kids. She still wants to live at home.
But then she fell and then you know, you hear that,
and then you well.
Speaker 2: See the problem there is that that's a person who
wants to keep living.
Speaker 3: Right, but she won't move to an assistant living, That's
what I mean. And then this, I think it was
this year. Last year, somebody was holding on. She said
her her mother was holding out for ten years. Yeah,
and just yeah, well you know the thing is like
just sad.
Speaker 2: You can't you can't force someone right, right, but to
have the right there if somebody said, like she.
Speaker 3: Said it would be better and this sounds terrible. It
would be better if she passed, yes, because she's just
in constant pain.
Speaker 2: When you hear that, yes, I mean you wish that
someone would just turn the morphine drip up a little bit.
Speaker 3: So yeah, absolutely, And well that's the hospital home. Yeah,
and I've seen that my friends. You know what your
mother was paying when you need a little more morphine.
And then I asked, you know, is that aloud? And
they tell you when they give you the morphine, like
you can give more than it's needed.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, I mean the thing is that your quality
of life is over.
Speaker 3: And I don't I think.
Speaker 2: I always had trouble with people who uh talked about
Robin Williams.
Speaker 3: And I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I know people who knew Robin, and
I've never had this discussion with him. But there would
be a lot of people out there going, you know,
suicide and that's all. And I'm going he had Louis
body dementia, which is terrible. I don't even know what
that was, whole body just kind of it's really bad.
You can look up what Louis body does and I
don't need to go, but the he knew he had it,
he was diagnosed with it, and he killed himself. I
don't think he wanted people to see him that way
or remember him that way. And it's all in what
the person wants, right, It's I mean that this is
a very personal decision, but I think to have the
option that if you decide right now, there's a young
woman who's trying to get legal, uh, basically a legal
suicide because her mental health is so bad that she
just can't live anymore. And as weird as that sounds, right,
you're talking to someone in their thirties, young, a lot
of life left. Could there be something? Could there be
a cure? I haven't read the article.
Speaker 3: I want to wait it out for I would. I
would tell a couple buddies if I was Richard Dreyfus,
whose life is it? Anyway? Yeah, he was an artist.
He became a quadriplegic, and he wanted to die, and
he fought in cordiny he got the right. I don't
know if that was based off of a probably his
story probably was.
Speaker 2: But but like the mental health, sure, if you if
you get to a certain point that GS can't handle it.
One of the classes I took. We had to do
at the end a movie project. He had to watch
a movie and then you had to do a presentation
about the movie, how the diagnosis played out throughout the movie,
what was real? What did Hollywood overreact to? And then uh,
you had to find other art involving that diagnosis. So
mine was schizophrenia and it was a beautiful mind. I
don't know if you ever saw that again.
Speaker 3: Oscar winner.
Speaker 2: Yep, it was an Oscar winner, and and and.
Speaker 3: Russell crow Dien now win Best Actor.
Speaker 2: No, he did not know.
Speaker 3: He got a fight. He was fooling around with Meg
Ryan and he got in a fight with a hotel
manager and Denzel Washington ended up winning, and that's when
he should have won. He won for Gladiator, and uh,
they make it up.
Speaker 2: But so we found an artist who had the diagnosis
of schizophrenia, and he decided he didn't want to take
his medicine anymore. He was just sick of it. However,
the medicine made him feel I don't know. So he
he painted like throughout as things got worse and worse
and worse.
Speaker 3: I saw that until he killed himself.
Speaker 2: I don't yeah, I don't remember the guy's name. But
it is out there. You can see it. You can
look it up and you can see like all of
a sudden he's painting like with things coming out of
his head and you know, all this stuff and uh
and in the end he did convince suicide and it's
really it's sad. And he wondered why because he could
have kept living. You know, people do live with schizophrenia.
Speaker 3: It's not but yeah, on a l I don't know,
not a lighter know. That's sorry. What's castle in Rochester?
You're ready?
Speaker 2: I am ready due to loan due to what low enrollment,
low enrollment in the upcoming hamster ball races.
Speaker 3: This event has been canceled hamster Ball Races, Yes.
Speaker 2: And Henrietta okay, yeah, they canceled it. Now, I didn't
think this was that big a deal. I thought, oh,
that's kind of a cute thing, kind of funny. And
then I even looked up there's a you can buy
little cars with a wheel in it and it looked
like a race car built around it and the hamster goes.
Speaker 3: Hunt's around.
Speaker 2: But people, we were very upset on their facebook page,
the Town of Henrietta's facebook page, what are they happy
to hear you guys made the right choice, even if
it was an arena.
Speaker 3: Do you need I mean, don't you do this in
a parking lot?
Speaker 2: You probably could do it well, no one was coming out.
I think they were gonna maybe do it at the
town hall.
Speaker 3: And nobody's coming out, but enough people are very upset.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, very upset to hear you guys made the
right choice, even if it was canceled due to low
sign ups and not morality. You have chosen the ethical route.
Animals are living beings, not toys, especially when they have
no capacity to enjoy said racing.
Speaker 3: You know what, what what do you got? What do
you got? Dog? I'm dog sitting, yeah, and I love dogs.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: And these people that dogs have rights, I should be
able to take my treated dog right. And then you
look at their Facebook page. They got him dressed up
in thirty seven different stupid outfits and you know that
dog hates it. It's so tight his eyes are bulging out.
They got one for Christmas, Thanksgiving, Halloween, they got sparklers
coming out of his ands. To the fourth of July.
I'm like, this isn't humane.
Speaker 2: No, no, I agree with that, and.
Speaker 3: A guy in the bar last night, Can I bring
my dog? And I'm like, no, you can't say no.
But he goes in Florida, everybody can. I'm like, whoa,
I go. One of the reasons just off tip my head,
people might be allergic. Oh that's a stupid real give
me a question. I'm giving you an answer, and all
of a sudden, I'm stupid. So I just stopped talking.
I mean, and look, you have not a security dog,
but special needs animal. I mean that was a dog.
See dog, Seize your dog right now. If a seizure
dog comes up to you without the owner, you're supposed
to call the police. I don't know if you knew that.
If a dog with a special needs.
Speaker 2: Or it'll simes they say, sees your dog on them
or something.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it comes up to you and there's no owner,
you're supposed to follow the dog. But I mean, how
many didn't somebody have a peacock, especially needs peacock at
the airport tarantula? I mean, how far is it going
to go? These people are just That was when I
was working a wind jammers. This guy came up with
a dog and he came jumping in fucking booth. I'm like,
get your dog out of here. Oh no, it's a
service dog. He's got his his papers around his collar.
I'm like, I'm not going to grab your dog to
call the owner come down. And then the guy didn't
fucking leave his the owner. I'm like, what are we doing? Well.
I remember being in a very crowded bar on St.
Speaker 2: Patrick's Day and a guy had a vest on a
dog that said, uh, service dog, so.
Speaker 3: You need a beer? That bad?
Speaker 2: Nobody was stopping, so all of a sudden, the dog
is run around.
Speaker 3: It's like sniffing over his crotch, and so I go,
there is no fucking way dog ruining what should be
a priority for some people's life. Yes, yes, yes, So
you're bringing your dog to the bank. You're driving with
Tippy on your lap high the well, that drives me nuts.
Oh it does.
Speaker 2: When I see the dog on the person's lap while
they're driving right, fucking drives me crazy because the dog
isn't It's not the dog's.
Speaker 3: Fault, it's your fault. You're a shitty owner, You're a
fucking idiot. Yes, I really do. I mean, God forbid,
the dog distracts you.
Speaker 2: You drive into the person in front, your airbag goes off,
and your dog's fucking just suffocated, just suffocated in your
big buss, your big bosom as that fucking thing comes.
Speaker 3: I want that to happen right where you're driving. You
pull over and you go, and she's still grasp me
for you, and you can say, you know what, you
fucking did it to yourself? You did, you did into
some video. I'll put you in the back.
Speaker 2: I wouldn't do that, but I wouldn't. I would want
to be helpful to somebody, and I would feel terrible.
But when I had a moment to step back and go, yeah,
it's your fucking fault.
Speaker 3: You know. Having your dog on your lap drives me nuts.
It does.
Speaker 2: I think it's and it's usually little dogs and sometimes
it's old ladies, and I go, your skills are diminished.
Oh my, absolutely, what are you thinking now? You need this?
Or how about the person that's driving little dog on
the lap, window fucking down and the dogs hanging out
the driver's side. No, I don't want to do that.
I don't want to cause a problem, and I don't
want the dog.
Speaker 3: I don't want it. I would never do that. I go,
you're a fucking in about it. You're a little farther
out of that dog's side. You're just swinging in it,
leaning and all of a sudden, Tippy's head is off
and Ethel's fucking got the seven car pileup. Yes, and
you're driving away picking up Bob to take them to
the airport. Oh. Should I see solved this in the
weed now? Oh my gosh, yes, everywhere. Weed is everywhere.
Speaker 2: Well, it's legalized, yeah.
Speaker 3: So it makes it all right for everybody in the
world to smell it. Yeah, God, I do. I think
it's just pure laziness. I think that if you I
have a picture of my head that all you're doing
is sitting home smoking weed, not working, getting a check
from the government, spending it on weed' that's your fucking lazy.
That's that's what I feel. That's the first thing that
comes to mind. I'm sorry, but it's true.
Speaker 2: What if they changed Let me just take it back
to Henry and for a second, what if they changed it.
They have those giants of the hamster races, the giant
balls that humans can get in, and they had human races,
would I would I would actually want to participate.
Speaker 3: There are so many other things I would do before that.
Speaker 2: You can get the critter cruiser, by the way, creat
cruiser one, that's what I called. By the way, didn't
kia his soul. I just thought of this, that the
creater cruiser. If you have a hamster, you want to
do something funny. Although people do say I guess it
could hurt their back and they don't like it.
Speaker 3: But I don't know.
Speaker 2: I have no idea heard a hamster back.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I know a guy that the youth needed a hamster.
His daughter came up. This is years ago, and we
were meeting for breakfast or lunch, and uh, she goes,
the hamster is not doing well. Dead And he goes,
all right, let me take a look. Go talk to
your mother. And the hamster is just kind of like seizuring.
Oh and he just held his fingers over the nose.
I mean, that's almost an ethical thing to do. It
really is wanted to take it to the what so
she wanted to take it? Of course, of course, killed
a fucking hamster five in front of your daughter, which
wasn't in the room.
Speaker 2: I'm like, okay, five hundred dollars or something just to
probably look at that little hamster's guts and yeah, yeah,
you know what, it's their own. If you have a pet,
love the pet, be kind to the pet while it's here.
George Carlin used to call them a bid the pet.
It's just a future tragedy.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, She'll tell you the pet store. This is gonna
end badly. Yeah, and it's true. It's true.
Speaker 2: That's terrible.
Speaker 3: That's you know. I've been putting a part in my
act about old dogs. I can't do it right here
because it's more of a stand up. But that's one
of my that's one of my goals is to write
more comedy during the week for the new year.
Speaker 2: I I I have to say this because there was
an awful lot of comments about how unethical this is,
how the hamsters don't like.
Speaker 3: It, how they know reading hamster people.
Speaker 2: I guess that it's their anxiety. Loud noises make them scared.
Speaker 3: So you give me some let fine, you know.
Speaker 2: Meanwhile, there's this.
Speaker 4: Guy who does Michael Schumacher.
Speaker 7: These are the This is a half or in a
red car, Hemi Hamilton and last but certainly not least,
Max first stopping in the pang and.
Speaker 4: Let's race three two.
Speaker 3: What some boy scout of that.
Speaker 2: Well, I mean, let's zoom out for just a second.
We're not talking about torturing these animals. I don't think
it's a hamster rate. It's not a cage fight. We're
not setting them in there. It's not a dog.
Speaker 3: Hamsters live in the wild.
Speaker 2: I have no idea. I really, where do.
Speaker 3: We get him from? They multiply like grabbit, Yeah they do.
They're like guinea pigs. They're probably over an asia or
of that.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: It's but mean somebody's eating them somewhere in course, yes,
And it's not industrial farming, you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: It's not like we're doing anything that You're doing this
at home with your hamster. So people get together and
have a little bit of fun, and I don't know,
people wake up in the morning and the side hamster's
where the hell we're all supposed to die on on
in terms of protecting and I don't I know.
Speaker 3: Is the race on DraftKings that's like, because if is
this a big deal? Because if it is, I chicken
and in bikini, I'm going to the race. If it's not,
I was staying at home watching.
Speaker 2: The question is just why are people mad, that's the thing.
And people were like really mad at the town Henrietta.
It's what does this say about where we draw the
line between harmless fun and normalized discomfort, especially when things
being stretched out can't exactly file a complaint.
Speaker 3: Well you have both, yes, ye? Yeah?
Speaker 2: What about my father And when we were kids, we
went down to Virginia and we went crabbing. H They
rented a house and we went on the chest beak
and we went crabbing. And so you put chicken down
and we caught the crabs and we brought them back.
And uh, when you buy crabs that are live or
lobsters that are alive, they come with their claws banded. Yeah,
well these didn't have their claws banded. And my father
they decided to race them.
Speaker 3: Across the kitchen to see who would go in the
pot first.
Speaker 2: And this is what he did with his kids, right,
you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: People go traumatic, I go, it's kind of fun. I've
heard that you were going to eat it before. Like,
I don't get the big deal.
Speaker 2: I don't know, it's it's just something I don't know.
Speaker 3: If an activity doesn't surely you know, serious, throw them
in with the pot or they're going to fly out. Yes, yes,
what do you mean throw them in with the pot?
Speaker 2: We put that, Yes, we did, I think we did.
You don't boil the water first, You put the man
and boil the water as it comes up.
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, no, friend told me about that, because then
you hear him screaming in the other road. It's not screaming, no,
it's it's like the area are coming out of there.
Speaker 2: It does sound like.
Speaker 3: I was like, yeah, you can lower them in right,
you know, into the you're gonna give us the plans,
mister banger. I'm going to put you in the water.
I'm sure, dear boy can't do that. I guess you're
having lobster from the ring. What if they added at
like a really fancy restaurant said to you, boy, I've
seen that in North Carolina, and all they do is
an oven. They take the lobster put it in.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: No, no, you don't hear them. No.
Speaker 2: But what if they if they said you go over
and pick the lobster. You and a friend and they go, okay,
we're gonna decide who's first.
Speaker 3: We're gonna have a little race and a lot. That
would do better than the hamster. Do you think like
I can? But again, I can see people getting out
running lobster outraged about this. Ah can you put? You
put a long enough bar and people will be betting
on that. I know more than quick draw.
Speaker 2: Well, what if you got one of those tables like
you know, the shuffle board table that play in the bar.
Speaker 3: They and you slide the laps down and you instead
of sand, you hit butter. Perfect. It's a million dollar
business right there, buddy.
Speaker 2: I feel like we're just protecting human feelings and things.
And I don't mean to disregard. I understand what people
are saying. Fine, don't do the races. You know, everybody
should treat any animal. Any animal should be treated kindly
and fairly. You should be a good home or a
good pet owner.
Speaker 3: Please.
Speaker 2: If you don't think you can be a good pet owner,
don't get a pet. Right so I can tell you
we get all right, Well, we'll take a moment. I
have a I have something that my sister sent me. Yeah,
and she said, don't become this guy, okay, and I
will play it for you and we'll get your thoughts
on it to that. Right after this, if the new
year has you saying I did not sign up for
this like a worker's comp case, social security disability, or
a personal injury claim. Don't try to.
Speaker 3: Google lawyer your way through it. Go to Connors and Ferris.
Speaker 2: They have offices in Buffalo, New York City, Syracuse, and Rochester,
and they'll get back to you within twenty four hours.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So even when you're stress scrolling at two am, you
can call two to comp, tell them a little bit
about what's going on in your life, and within twenty
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You'll talk to real lawyers who will explain things in
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Speaker 4: Now session number three on his way this.
Speaker 3: Time keep your hands and feet inside the car till
the riot comes in complete. Stime here it comes all
the way From, Alabama, Bama. Lama my main.
Speaker 8: Man the one they only get your extinguishers, ready, ladies
he's a fire alarm fire my. Friend in your, podcast
point deck Ster Bill.
Speaker 2: Mowrey they look so young in this. Video, YEAH i
MEAN i just saw a picture of.
Speaker 3: Things it looks like THE. Cp, yeah Skinny minnie and
uh going he could use a tanning. Booth H, yeah
he's all skinning. BONES i think he's like four foot.
Speaker 2: Eleven, OH i don't. Know, yeah he's really. Short, yeah
sure that it. Was, yeah there he is in his
little knickers jumping. Around it's, uh that's your that's your favorite, Band,
yes of all, time all. Time you're gonna go THINK
i just saw him like this, YEAR i, know, yeah
so would you go? AGAIN i Guess.
Speaker 3: YEAH i Saw Bob seeker year after, year and the
first time was. BETTER i don't know, why but maybe
because there wasn't enough time, to you, know get that yearning.
Speaker 2: TO i can understand. THAT i can understand. That that's,
uh that makes a some sense. There what's going on
in the in the the lady department For dougy for?
Speaker 3: Nothing the same old. LUCK i had a hooker last.
Night she told me that on the first. Date, Really
oh my, God, Rodney i'm so sorry. THIS a girl
called me. Up she had to come on. Over there's nobody.
HOME i went over there was nobody home. Stuff you,
Know god he was SO i just Loved, roddy, loved
loved Love roger and gets young five foot, two five foot.
Speaker 2: Two you looked it. Up, yeah, okay all, right it's
not four. ELEVEN i don't know what the cutoff. Is
there's a height cut off for the jack. Rabbit, yeah
like there, IS i think for the jack, rabbit and
there will always joke you have to be this tall
to ride this. Ride BUT i thought there was a
cut off for what would be considered a dwarf or little. Person,
yeah THERE'S i believe there's a height cut, off AND
i thought it was four foot. Eleven it sounds almost
too BALL.
Speaker 3: I cut off for dwarf. Ism uh four foot ten. Inches,
okay see so we're, close, right.
Speaker 2: Could you imagine if like because usually.
Speaker 3: Dwarfs there was a midget on a dating site the other.
DAY i looked at. It stop, It i'm not stop.
IT i threw it hard on. There why?
Speaker 2: Not you're.
Speaker 3: KIDDING i am.
Speaker 2: Not you're you're making. THIS i am not making. This
you are absolutely making it. Up yes you. Are, next
you're going to tell me it was a woman with
a flat head and and.
Speaker 3: Her father owns a liquor. Store no, Okay i'm, like,
yeah good for you need some, Dick.
Speaker 2: No bigger dick would look at her little.
Speaker 3: Hand would be. Awesome, yeah taking picture and send it to.
YOU i guess WHERE i, Am, Wendy.
Speaker 2: I'm uh have a hamburgery next to my dick with her,
hands one hand on the.
Speaker 3: Hamburger you're big and. Juicy this is this is. Terrible
it's poor woman's put herself out. There you got wouldn't you?
LIKE i didn't take a. PICTURE i don't picture somebody.
Speaker 2: Else, NO i don't want you, know, Well i'm just
taking don't even know if she was In. Rochester oh
what was the dating?
Speaker 3: SITE i Think Facebook dating to that might scroll every
now and then you home watching the game Or facebook. Dating,
yeah you have to sign in to DO i think it's.
Free it's. Free Off, NO i think it's probably. Free
but did you have to sign up and put your
own profile up? There? YEAH i think you have to
do that in order to Look.
Speaker 2: How how? Okay, Esca.
Speaker 3: I'm. DOWN i went from old women to. Midgets don't
ask me the spiral in my? Life can we get old?
Midgets old. Midgets oh, gosh how long did midget live?
FOR i don't. KNOW i don't. KNOW i can't.
Speaker 2: Talk about any Humane, god.
Speaker 3: What adult one child for the? Movie, please.
Speaker 2: When you when you go on an, airport if you
don't even buy one seats in your, list that's. True
there you go.
Speaker 3: To, snuggle. Snuggle, Yes i'm all for.
Speaker 2: That put her in the.
Speaker 3: Overhead that's. TERRIBLE i wonder if you have any short.
People isn't that a short? Person that's a politically CORRECT
i would, assume, YEAH i would assume it's something like
that little little. People you don't use midget, ANYMORE i don't.
Speaker 2: Believe so, Yeah AND i don't know why.
Speaker 3: You didn't seem it didn't seem like it was that
big a.
Speaker 2: Deal BUT i don't.
Speaker 3: Know.
Speaker 2: UH i thought MG's was the car.
Speaker 3: And g's m G Mg, Yeah, BRITISH i believe they. Were,
no BUT i think the car was called a. Midget
you can put them in a ball and race against.
Amsters now that they have midget wrestling down to the,
beach this is turned into a big. Thing so, YEAH i,
know you know. WHAT i remember distinctly going TO uh
wrestling in The War memorial that now it's A Blue
Cross war. Memorial, uh midget wrestling involved in the big.
Ticket it was. Hilarious it was great as my, Dad,
No i'm.
Speaker 2: Sure and the thing is, this like if they're making
money and willing participants worth the harm in?
Speaker 3: It, right if you're not being dragging them? In and why?
Speaker 2: PEOPLE i couldn't go watch that BECAUSE i THINK i
wouldn't want to be laughing like at another human THAT
i don't. KNOW i don't know, FULLY i don't. Know
it's just there's something in my head that IS i
can't like the gross with, you that that, DISCONNECT i
have that. DISCONNECT i, can't you, know BECAUSE i feel,
like you, Know i'm making fun of somebody for something
they can't.
Speaker 3: Control and midget drag queen, Shows i'm sure They why
why look at me like? That what do you looking
at The?
Speaker 2: Facebook it's down at, traffics it's your lot which they
have a midget drag?
Speaker 3: Show, yeah where they come out and drag? It? Yeah why? Not?
Fuck they got? Wrestling you, know there's shows are.
Speaker 2: Entertainers again, AGAIN i understand, right, anybody no matter what you're,
human you should be allowed to do whatever you want to.
Speaker 3: Do, yeah why wouldn't they be allowed to do? THAT
i don't.
Speaker 2: Know i'm just and maybe it says more about me
and my Uncomfortable, well you can't like. Everything, NO i,
understand but people apologize too much for.
Speaker 3: It i'm.
Speaker 2: NOT i don't mean to. Apologize i'm not SAYING i
JUST i want to go to.
Speaker 3: That why? Not, WELL i just my feeling IS i
just don't like. IT i Don't and then you have
to explain that's one THING i hate in this. World,
well why don't you want to go because they don't want?
Speaker 2: To?
Speaker 3: Well why not because they don't fucking feel? It you
want to go and strip? Up, Yeah i'll. Go there's
something jumps up to me and, says let's go to
the strip. Club you want to see a Dragmon is. Show,
Yeah i'm gonna go to strip. Club it's just what you.
Speaker 4: Like it's who you.
Speaker 2: Are well that this is.
Speaker 3: True and people want to be a. Nurse some people
want to be a. BROADCAST i, think, YES i don't
THINK i could be a.
Speaker 2: Nurse my bigger, Thing i'm not sure.
Speaker 3: People can't be. BARTENDERS i feel.
Speaker 2: Like it's making fun of somebody for something they can
that that's WHY i. CAN'T i love busting, balls BUT
i love busting balls on Things LIKE i remember making
like fat jokes to people and they're, like that's not.
Speaker 3: BUNNY i think that's worse than going to see the.
Speaker 2: Midgets AND i, said AND i, go, Yeah BUT i
feel like for fat people it is something they can.
Control they may have gotten out of, control but they
can find help to control. It, yes, right and now
there's all kinds of stuff that are helping people.
Speaker 3: Get control of. It, yes you can take a, pill
stand yourself, something all. Right and the, ozempic, YEAH i
think it's more it's for. Diabetics, yeah but it also
affects your brain in the way that it tells you
not to, eat don't be. Hungry and you really have
to go along with it because the friend that was doing,
it she's lost a good deal amount of. Weight but
then she co works as have tried it and gave
up out of two. Weeks So i'm not losing weight
like you. Are but you're not doing it. Right you
have to give it a, chance and it's more of
your mind control of you, Know i'm, Hungry i'll have a. Snack,
well then just don't have a. Snack, WELL i agree
with you on. THAT i did. That it's partly It
you're just not going to stab yourself and all of
a sudden you're gonna be this super thin. Model it's
not going to.
Speaker 2: HAPPEN i did a diet years, ago AND i am
probably close to fifty pounds heavier THAN i was after the.
Diet now was that what would be considered a healthy.
Weight it was designed for diabetics, again and then they
started putting. It, no there was nothing to. This there
was no, pills magic, potions anything like. That it was
basically just eating better and calorie, deficit and within thirty
DAYS i did lose thirty. Pound the part.
Speaker 3: Of That i'm worried about now is, This NOW i
don't have the sagging. Gut i've got a. Gut if
you lose too, fast then it hangs. Over you see
that out in, public and that's not. Pretty, no you
know you might look thinner and get this girl. Home
and then also you got a fucking fanny. Pack, jesus, yeah,
gosh oh so it's behind my? Fanny what. Joke last
TIME i saw my dick is WHEN i was. Naked
Jac pennies in the changing, rooms three or four mirror.
Thing sometimes you had to do a. Handstand i'm not
a lot OF. J. C, Pennies, no really at. ALL
i can.
Speaker 2: Understands listen to. That my sister sent me this TikTok
and it's a. Gentleman he's from The. South we'll listen
to this and we'll Get doug's thoughts on. It my
sister said to, me don't become this. Guy do not
become this.
Speaker 9: Guy anticipating a rather large, EVENING i got a gal
coming up From South. Georgia she's From. Sylvester she's coming
up and spend the weekend with. Me AND i wrapped
up lunch with a gentleman who SAID i should stop
by a gas station and grabbed some rhinoceros pills and honey.
Pick SO i took his word for. IT i done
down to all the, ingredients and, buddy it's got my
stomach knocking like at ninety seven In. POLA i, mean
it feels like fucking boots and a dryer right. NOW
i let out a ford, earlier but it had by
thencinerated the cloth on my truck. Seating it's probably gonna
ch when it.
Speaker 3: Dries.
Speaker 9: Uh, anyhow she's not gonna be here till. SIX i
should be all cleaned up by, then and if y'all
need to holler at, me do. So i'll try to
get back with you, clearly And i'm gonna be up
for a. While oh, so guys in the, meantime y'all take.
Speaker 1: Care what is?
Speaker 2: It it's A southern guy sitting in his car filming
himself talking about all the pills he took to try
to get ready for this date because he's.
Speaker 3: Excited he's just posting this on social.
Speaker 2: Media, YEAH i CLEARLY i believe it's a bit or a.
Speaker 3: Joker he's don't it be? Funny but, no that was
a lot of.
Speaker 2: Whistling, yeah that was a lot of, whistling a lot
of loose. Answers it's A southern horny toad with loose.
Answers BUT i do want to if some guys go
and do these things thinking that something's gonna, happen but
that it doesn't happen and now you're stuck with a heart.
Speaker 3: On, yeah oh you know WHAT i. Mean but having
never tried by, agra yeah you know you should try.
It she just walk around the house with a HEART i,
MEAN i got the bill by the forty nine. Ers
IF i take it during The bills, game and by
the end of forty nine, ers it'll be. Gone walk.
Speaker 2: Around, yeah you can walk around all day with.
Speaker 3: THAT i think that's what. People you, know, guys get this.
Viager i'm gonna be thirty years younger and gonna fuck
longer and. Harder, no you're. Not you, know if you
want to run a marathon and you get brand new,
sneakers you're still only running one hundred. Yards, yeah and
you're getting get tired and. Board same way with. Viagra
you're only get fuck so long once you get to
a certain. AGE i think the planets have to come a.
Line you got to be in the. Mood she's got
to be in the.
Speaker 2: Mood. YEAH i think viagra can help some people go further.
LONGER i don't, know BUT i would think that it's
also probably not the most natural way if you're taking
a bill that, no you know What i'm, Saying.
Speaker 3: LIKE i think there's like got a pill for.
Speaker 2: Everything they'll tell you that you're supposed to do like
kegel exercise to rebuild your pelvic floor and whatever that,
is and don't do them wrong because you could cause
your damage and and who.
Speaker 3: Knows go talk to your urologists if you, GRAVING i mean. Urologists,
no have you ever seen? One? Yeah does he go
up in? There? Yeah oh he'll go up in.
Speaker 2: There.
Speaker 3: Yeah how's? That?
Speaker 2: Check your probably? Cry you've never had your prostate? Checked,
no you should probably Do, yeah you should definitely do.
THAT i MEAN i don't some of your. Fiber sorry about,
That sorry about, that my. BAD i got a doctor.
STHAN i got a prostate example. Once, yeah AND i
had khaki pants, on and this guy lubed up like looped.
Speaker 3: Up so now you put one finger to figure one finger?
ONE i don't, know, yeah, one, OKAY i never been.
EITHER i don't know how many rides are? There answer some.
Questions my dad used to always do.
Speaker 2: THIS i would always do a. Joke you would, go
uh DO i, SAID i, have don't, WORRY i have
slender fingers used. TOO i feel, like why the?
Speaker 3: Fuck what is wrong with? You? YEAH i had a
prostate exam on both his, hands, Right Jesus, christ his
hands around my.
Speaker 2: Shoulders this is, true, THOUGH i got this guy used
so much like lubricant that it was like and he
just said when he was, done you, know pull up
your pants on. Three so you pull up your pants
and THEN i go back to work and somebody's, like
what happened to?
Speaker 3: You what are you talking? About they, go you.
Speaker 2: Got like a quarter size dead center in your, ass
fucking loop loub stain like, this AND i, go oh my,
god it fucking leaks out of.
Speaker 3: You it's, nasty fucking. Nasty didn't take half a day. Off,
no we ain't got a prostate, exam went back to the.
WORLD i don't know what's gonna. Happen maybe it might
loosen something up in. There ye if he did, it DID?
Speaker 2: I but NOW i always make SURE i, go you
GET i can wipe with. Her, yeah BUT i haven't
had a prostetic examine in a. While but you should
at our. Age but with The i'll tell you, this
IT i am hearing about. More and it seems LIKE
i don't know younger and younger people with colon cancer and,
things and THEY i think now for, colonoscopies they've lowered
it to forty. Five they're putting something in the. Water
it could BE i don't, know it could. BE i,
mean it just but it is you, know kind of
a scary thing. Too uh and like you, know you
go in and you get it, done AND.
Speaker 3: I think you can just poop in a box and
send it. Back, yeah that's still is removing. It there
you go, there you should do. That then you can
do bombs away home with a. Box Perfect Bill. Moran
we're sending him another. Box it's it's week two of. This, yeah,
yeah he wants another. One, OKAY i love. IT i love.
That thank you for thinking of. ME i, uh you
should let me know how it. Goes, NO i.
Speaker 2: CAN'T i would go in and get the real thing
because if you do have, polyps they can't remove.
Speaker 3: Them but you still get to poop in a. Box
you love. That play some? Music, YEAH i could know Halftime.
Speaker 2: SHOULDER i, mean let me tell you. Something IF i
thought THAT i, could like IF i were a little
buzzed AND i was having a good, Time i'm. Not
there's nothing THAT i am not above reproach on. Anything.
Speaker 3: Right you, know you don't want to hear about it
in the, morning you know WHAT i? Mean DID i do?
THAT i can't BELIEVE i did, that Which i've heard
out of you a couple of. TIMES i don't want
to talk ABOUT i can't BELIEVE i did. This what,
okay all right for a, question what was the last
time you had that moment of what where you wake
up and you, go, oh, MAN i HOPE i didn't.
Speaker 2: Or whatever it was say something or do something long?
Time you, know.
Speaker 3: Text somebody in my twenties WHEN i Was, YEAH i call,
friends you. Know DO i do anything stupid or say anything? Stupid?
No what about nothing?
Speaker 2: Recently AND i just mean in terms of just in,
general like acting like a. FOOL i don't MEAN.
Speaker 3: I haven't acted like a fool in a.
Speaker 2: While, yeah it's a whole new dougie. Fresh, yeah what's going?
Speaker 3: On just? AGE i think. DEPRESSED i don't, know maybe a.
LITTLE i did look it up this. WEEK i Thought
i'm very fatigued and uh tired and, unmotivated depressed and
yeah and uh they said this time of year with
the weather like seasonal. Depression, yeah season, sad called it. Sad,
Yeah So, tuesday and we'll slept twelve. HOURS i don't.
OFF i ubered for a, while tired at five, o'clock
went went to, bed woke up at, nine stayed up till,
twelve went to, bed woke up at. Eight, yeah So
WEDNESDAY i was. Good maybe you just sometimes you really
need to recharge your. Batteries but oh so much fatigue at.
Once i'm, LIKE i can UNDERSTAND i have. Something i'm,
LIKE i.
Speaker 2: Don't, yeah the worry wharton me for no. REASON i
don't think there's no. Reason that sounds like a. Reason
oh my.
Speaker 3: Gosh i'm looking up On. Google soon we're.
Speaker 2: Gonna have to have a opening on the.
Speaker 3: Podcast my dad's gonna tell you. Worry oh, Pop i'll
be right, here maybe going. ON i, mean you didn't
have me in For elvis's, birthday and you know my.
SON i don't make double things like my. Son but
here you. Go i'll take a poop in a box with. You.
Speaker 2: Man the poop in a box thing is LIKE i
always go because it's so, advertised right if you are
the mail person or the service whatever it is that.
Speaker 3: Picks it, up And i'm thinking it's Like FedEx or something,
like you have To i'm sure you have to wrap.
Speaker 2: It oh you do inside of plastic?
Speaker 3: Stuff? Yeah, yeah well well, TAPED i would.
Speaker 2: Assume but, like what if you're like one of these.
Germophobes you don't know what you're picking. Up it says
right in the. Box it's one of these box with
the little member of the box talks to you in the.
Speaker 3: End good shot.
Speaker 2: Me you haven't seen that that it's just, that come shitting.
Speaker 3: Me give me A cleveland. Steamer, NO i guess you're. Right,
Yeah german, FOLKS i would find that.
Speaker 2: Weird like you, know it's a it's a brave new.
Speaker 3: World we got all kinds of. THINGS i don't think
it's too. BRAVE i think we got a bunch of.
Pussies what are you talking. About i'm just saying that
what are you work ethic and the hardness and the
fierceness that we grew up at the dirt and take a.
Lamp Oh, no everybody's traumatized and can't have. This AND
i gotta have my dog and my my latteke coffee
with a little shake of. Finnamonon and IF i don't
get that by ten, o'clock my whole day is.
Speaker 2: Ruined, Right we'll take a, Moment, OKAY i want to
hear more about these thoughts on the on the weakness
of our.
Speaker 3: Society, Oh i'm just getting what's. HAPPENING i see a
lot of. Society all, right we'll get to. That you, got,
WELL i got a new piece of. Cardboard so WHEN
i stop at a light and the guy's out there with
the cardboard Saying i'm, homeless please GIVE i show him my.
Cardboard it SAYS i work three, jobs would you like?
One and he walks the other. Way it's. GREAT i
don't get bothered. Anymore for every problem there is a, solution.
Okay and he was pooping in a. Box you hear
more about this in just a.
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Speaker 3: Com what Is? Lady don't hurt?
Speaker 4: Me don't hurt me no?
Speaker 5: More all, right, ladies here he is the wonder from
Down under With chippin', wheels.
Speaker 4: The admill of the.
Speaker 5: AIRWAVES A Poindexter, Podcasts ladies you should Love Dollars ready.
Speaker 4: Six foot two and as a blue From, Detroit.
Speaker 5: Michigan the reason they put back seats and, cars Mister
bill Ban.
Speaker 2: That's ALL i can think, of uh before we get
to Uh doug being grumpy and telling you why the
world's fucked up from his world's.
Speaker 3: Fine the world's gonna be here a long time after. Us,
yes people in, IT.
Speaker 2: I, think, so, yeah, yeah you just have no you
know what it is, like here's this, guy AND i
would often, think, like you have so much, empathy and
you have a lot of you do a lot of
a lot of wonderful. Things but then but then you
have a tolerance level that's getting lower and, lower like your.
Testosterone it's just lower and lower and. LOWER i don't understand.
Speaker 3: Just, Now I'm bill, baby the legos went, wrong so
part of the, DESIGN i JUST i don't understand what's the,
uh what's the.
Speaker 2: Thing BUT i just want to tell, you like you,
Know I'M i am both impressed and and happy that
you are not, drinking AND i know you're.
Speaker 3: Gonna start working out and all these things you're gonna be.
Speaker 2: Feeling i've been pushing myself a lot, LATELY i mean
a lot in a lot of, areas and, uh.
Speaker 3: It's been pretty.
Speaker 2: GOOD i, WENT i went and did a class today
that just kicked my. ASS i, went, no this was
a it WAS i think it was body. Pump NO
i did one like.
Speaker 3: THAT i gotta tell, you LIKE, i classes will kick your.
Speaker 2: Ass SO i did what they called upbeat strength the other.
Day AND i walk in and of Course i'm getting,
there LIKE i should probably get there ten minutes before class.
Speaker 3: Starts i'm coming in just at the last.
Speaker 2: Minute and the parking lot at the gym is just two, packed,
right you can't find. Parking everybody's got Their New york's
resolution that usually dies By Presidents. Day it's usually like,
okay yuh.
Speaker 3: Bag to be a.
Speaker 2: Fat SO i go into this class and it's all,
women and it is there is a, difference LIKE i
did boxing stuff where you you know in boxing gyms
where you would hang and they would hit you or
throw a medicine ball at your stomach to try to
get you. Ready so it's like you've done a lot
of these, things And i'm familiar with the how classes.
Were this was a class where you had to put
bands around your legs and then it as part of your.
Speaker 3: Squat it was the scoop and.
Speaker 2: Up and it's like all these asses going in, rhythm
And i'm standing there AND i, Go i've gotten over.
Rhythm i'm so uncomfortable right. NOW i don't know how
to do.
Speaker 3: This but the class kicked my. Ass like you're in
the back of the. Class, yeah, yeah you're not going
up with the front.
Speaker 2: Line, NO i don't care WHERE i go BECAUSE i
figure everybody's here doing the same Thing i've. GOTTEN i
think IT'S i think it's age Where i'm not here
to look. Good i'm here to feel. Better that's really
my main. GOAL i want to feel. BETTER i Don't
i'm not even there to necessarily lose weight or.
Speaker 3: WHATEVER i just want to feel. Better and uh, SO
i FIGURE i don't give a, ship you, KNOW i
don't give a ship IF i look foolish or. Not
And i'm SURE i. DO i, mean nobody should be
judging in. THAT i don't judge.
Speaker 2: That oh fuck that this whole idea that we don't,
judge we don't. Judge, yes the fuck we, do and
we should continue to judge because it's a safety. Thing
i'm telling, you it's like an.
Speaker 3: Acidy somebody comes out even.
Speaker 2: There, well here's HOW i judge.
Speaker 3: That fat fucking do? It, then so CAN I i'm
the grumpy old. Man somebody comes in three hundred and
four hundred pounds and they got some spie pants And i'm,
like you know, what good for? You, okay me as?
Well that's me as. WELL i guess that's WHAT i. Mean, hey, hey,
good hey this? Fuck what the fuck is this? Guy?
Speaker 2: There no good on. You i'm glad you're, here right
ALWAYS i, Succeed, yeah, yeah BUT i have a side
bet that you'll be out by.
Speaker 3: President i'm going to secretly leave a bag of, chips
like you, know like a horn of, plenty just out
just to see if you.
Speaker 2: Grab them after. Class i'm.
Speaker 3: KIDDING i, Know i'm.
Speaker 2: Kidding all, Right so what are the things that are bothering?
Speaker 3: You started?
Speaker 2: Again you got yourself all reaped up. There you're talking
about society and people not contributing and not doing their
part and blah blah.
Speaker 3: Blah and you, KNOW i DON'T i don't even know
where to start. SCHOOLS i, mean are the kids really
kids really learning? Anything AND i don't know do you have?
Kids you have a? Kid are they? Learning is?
Speaker 2: Learning?
Speaker 3: YES i think the school is. WONDERFUL i, do but
that's does get a lot of. Homework yes he. Does,
okay is it all on the?
Speaker 2: Tablet Uh, no we were actually working on worksheets and breaking.
Out they give you now more of a rubric to do,
essays WHICH i. Not my style of stuff is the new.
Way Uh so there was all these notes and things
he had to put in certain. Sections so that WAS i,
MEAN i no more.
Speaker 3: Cursive we're still on The i'm not.
Speaker 2: Sure it depends on where you.
Speaker 3: GO i THINK i mean vocabulary words anything like.
Speaker 2: That, yeah they're still spelling in vocabulary.
Speaker 3: Words.
Speaker 2: English, yeah, Yeah French, american The french And Indian, war
which always was a confusing name to me because it
was really The french and The british that were, fighting
but neither one could get over here in an effective.
Manner so they persuade on the you, know they Persuded
indians to fight on their. Behalf oh so. Took that's
that's what they did in The. French uh that was. System,
yeah it was The french And Indian. War AND i
always go it's slightly, mislabeled but uh, NO i THINK i.
DON'T i don't SEE i, MEAN i hear the. COMPLAINTS
i don't see the.
Speaker 3: Stuff the Weed i've heard everybody this past couple of,
weeks and, UH i hear FROM i picked up school,
drivers school bus, drivers and somehow we get on the
weed and, like, YEAH i mean the kids come on
the bus at seven in the mornings wreaking a weed
because their parents are parents or of themselves.
Speaker 2: THEMSELVES i, mean BECAUSE i think there's ways when it's.
Speaker 3: Well grammar schools and, smoking no hope, now but then
they come on and you're getting a secondary. High the
kids probably stolen out of his mind and the parents
think it's. Okay, YEAH i mean that was a big
thing WHEN i was driving. Around, uh teachers THROUGH, covid
you know there there's zoom. Classes they had to actually
write emails to, parents don't do drugs near the, screen
please have clothes, on don't walk around, naked don't. SMOKE
i oh, god there's like ten things they had to.
Do the parents had to do because you're the kids
are all on there and all of a sudden you
have a mother walking around naked in the. Background i'm,
like this, happens she goes all the, Time, yeah she.
Goes then we had to contact the parents and you're
like this common, Sense, yeah just not to do. IT
i and the MUSIC i hear, music, Though oh fuck
smack that. Bitch WHEN i get, Home i'm gonna give
it to your heart and a heart and a. Heart
And i'm listening to, This i'm, like this is a
fucking Downfall. AMERICA i understand free, speech but if you're
you're listening To smack that, bitch And i'm gonna fuck you.
UP i, mean the. Lyrics next TIME i come, In
i'm gonna bring in top. Ten. UH i don't even
know if IT'S r AND b or rap. Songs And
i'm gonna bring in the lyrics and we're gonna we're
gonna go through.
Speaker 2: It, okay all, right you tell me give yourself a homework? Assignment?
Speaker 3: Right? Yeah what's wrong and what's right with?
Speaker 2: This? Uh? YEAH i MEAN I i think there's there's
some things there That i'm not always in favor. OF
i don't have as strong an opinion as. YOU i
think my you, know because even a parent is.
Speaker 1: You.
Speaker 2: Can't kids are Are i'm going to say, this kids are.
WAY i was going to use the term, Smarter i'll
change that to way more aware of what is acceptable and.
Speaker 3: What is not.
Speaker 2: Acceptable and they are in terms of parental and adult.
Behavior oh, yeah oh, yeah they're fucking and they're on.
It they know, it they know.
Speaker 3: Oh, things they can get you in trouble for.
Speaker 2: You, yeah they're aware of, stuff so they're.
Speaker 3: Everything on TikTok is, like, well you should be traumatized by.
That he, said they're. Wrong you should certainly be offended by.
This MAYBE i.
Speaker 2: DON'T i. Don't i'm not. SURE i, MEAN i guess if.
Speaker 3: You go to work and you, hit you don't feel really,
good you can leave and that's. Okay, no it's. Not,
well you, know you don't work out your shift and
you feel. Sick, yeah, yeah well we'll tell you when
you're sick and then you will send you. Home see.
Speaker 2: That they don't agree with it at.
Speaker 3: All it's. Bullshit WELL i HAVE i have a tony tough.
Ships suck it up and.
Speaker 2: Work, well four hour ship, here here's my. Thing if
if it depends on what it, is, right but if
you're gonna be, touching if you're gonna be serving food or,
whatever then fucking go home and get yourself. Together you're
just not getting paid for, today.
Speaker 3: Right and kids don't. Care it sucks for with uber
how many people like uber that are lated to Work
And i'm not saying five minutes or you, know can
you hurry? UP i don't want to be late for,
work like half an hour hour and a half two.
Hours they just don't give a. Ship, yeah that's that's.
Terrible but that's somebody who doesn't want to go to that.
Speaker 4: Job which job do they want to?
Speaker 3: GO i, DON'T i don't. KNOW i, mean and they
smell a? Weed fuckers like why did you? Walk what
are your fucking? Problem but work?
Speaker 2: Ethic And i'm also thinking of jobs where you would
get sent home and you could work from, home like
if it's there are jobs where a lot of it's
just on a screen, anyway AND i would rather not
be sneezing and sniffling and all that and it if
you get the work, done if you meet the th
if you're talking.
Speaker 3: To what, loves you can wear a, mask you, know
all this stuff to protect you FROM, covid that you
can wear it. WORK i still see people with, masks
like why why do you like the smell of your own?
Breath what is? Wrong well to keep them, Yes AND
i say the same thing when they're wearing it outside
on a nice beautiful. Day THEN i don't, understand but,
yeah a little in their, car BUT i see it
with their, dog and THE.
Speaker 2: I see it in certain. Places i'll see, it you,
know if you go to a grocery store and. Stuff
and AND i often think MAYBE i should say thank
you because maybe they're not feeling. WELL i don't want
to get other people, say BUT i often, THINK i
JUST i don't know THAT i can do. THAT i
don't know THAT i can do that wear a. MASK
i don't want to have to do, it you know
WHAT i, MEAN i, Guess and so if it's a, choice,
great good for. You BUT i Don't AND i don't
want to see someone, sick AND i don't want to.
Speaker 3: Get someone, else.
Speaker 2: DON'T i don't think so we are in terms of
any restrictions and. Stuff BUT i they're selling kits, now
and this is interesting to me because it came out
you can buy at home test that'll test you for three.
Things it'll test you FOR, covid it'll test you for
FLU a or. Flub AND i think that IT i,
mean it's kind of helpful because, now let's say doctors
do a lot of telehealth. Stuff so IF i can
call my doctor and, go, hey look my kid just
got tested. Positive we did it, twice flew. A is
there something that you? Recommend and it's usually just stay,
hydrated you, Know radville tile and all every four, hours
switch them on and, off that kind of, thing and
that's about. It so you, know you gotta. Ride you
gotta ride that shit.
Speaker 3: OUT i had a. Lean this was seven years. Ago,
anyways it was right AFTER covid and, uh it was
right after my breast cancer bowling. Event and see. That
he called me and, said, HEY i tested positive FOR. Covid,
yeah and she come to find out she was. Testing
she was a tester FOR covid, tests so she was
doing it constantly and one out of fifty came back
positive and they had called bull. Roll then they had
to tell the, state and then the state called. Me they,
said did you run a? FUNDRAISER i, go, YES i. Did,
well we need the names of everybody was. THERE i,
GO i threw it, out WHAT i, go what it
was last? Week i'm, Like i'm on the next. Year
see the bad stuff is. Like and the following year
WHEN i, announced thank you everybody for. Coming and by the,
way if you GET, covid it wasn't, here and don't
call me thing out of my.
Speaker 2: Mouth, OH i like to think WITH covid in the
beginning the idea they were doing the best they could
with the. INFORMATION i just wish that there were things
like you couldn't go to, parks you shouldn't be walking
on the canal, trail you shouldn't do any of, This
and to, me that was the best. Thing AND i
think that there shouldn't Be, YEAH i think there was
times where there were certain parks you weren't allowed to
go Into State. Park this is What i'm. Understanding that's
WHAT i, mean AND I i wish that there was
more of. THAT i think that there are things that
have hung over THAT i, think and we've talked about,
it THAT i think are very very bad as a
residual of the protocols that went into. Place Like i'm
not such a fan the work from. Home, like, yeah
If i'm a sales person AND i have a cold
AND i don't know And i'm sneezing AND i can't,
say BUT i can send, emails write a commercial commercial
for them Whatever i'm or meet with my, clients check
in with them from.
Speaker 3: Home great do it from.
Speaker 2: Home right by the, way if you're in, sales it's
your shingle basically underneath whatever company you you are the.
Business so you'll suffer by not going out there and
getting you, know meeting your quotas whatever that. Is BUT
I i always think, OVERALL i thought that it's a
the remote work stuff.
Speaker 3: Is not.
Speaker 2: Mental health. Healthy and by THAT i mean we are social.
Animals AND i know that a lot of times romantic
things come out of of work. Situations there are people
that but but not all relationships are that, way and
you can have you have people missing out on mentors
or just day to day. THINGS i think that a
lot of times great ideas come out of two people
talking at the water or in the. Interaction AND i
think all that has has in some places gone. Away
and you'll see you see some companies trying to have
a mandate that you know or or did have mandates
back to back to the. OFFICE i want you in.
Here AND i remember a lot of people like, yeah
because we get looking for new. Jobs, sure and some
of them found them and did. Well But i'm not
sure THAT i couldn't do. THAT i could not do.
THAT i need to you see. PEOPLE i gotta be,
out AND i do think overall it just makes you overall,
healthy you, KNOW i really. DO i think so with. People,
YEAH i MEAN i.
Speaker 3: Even saw somebody who's GOING i mean not as social as,
us BUT i mean even go to the grocery store.
Speaker 2: And, yeah you know, right and there's somebody you, know the.
Right and there are times WHERE i, mean, LOOK i get.
IT i Have instacart that once in a WHILE i just,
GO i can't fucking get. THERE i gotta get this.
Stuff this kid's eating me out at, home AND i
need shit, now AND i don't have the. TIME i,
mean grad, SCHOOL i Got, Okay so there are things like.
That but you're, right you're a fucking one hundred percent,
right and that those are the things THAT i think
that that really hurt us when you when you look at.
It i'm not sure about the vaccine.
Speaker 3: STUFF i don't fucking. Know i'm not a.
Speaker 2: Scientist i'm not smart enough to understand that. Stuff i'm
sure there are People i've heard of horrible things happening
to some people after they got THE covid. Shot was
it a result of THE covid? Shot of, course no
one's going to ever really, know so we can draw
our own. Conclusions but your own conclusions are an, opinion
they're not based on scientific. Fact and those are the
things THAT i always GO i, DON'T i don't understand
a little mixed around.
Speaker 3: Tonight, yeah that was all right at. Last, yes it's
good to see, it good to see. YOU i ALWAYS i.
Speaker 2: WILL i won't leave it on that. NOTE i usually
don't delve into these things too it BECAUSE i think
people get so, divided and you, KNOW i.
Speaker 3: Just, god it's just so fucking.
Speaker 2: Sad that's ALL i can.
Speaker 4: Say For Dougie fresh Who I'm Bill.
Speaker 3: Moran we'll see You. Tom you un.
Speaker 4: State it seems they were Looking borough cattle With tennessee