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Speaker 1: Good morning from Hell. This is Chris and Clayton.

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Speaker 2: I died recently, and my eternal punishment is to do

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a podcast for all eternity where we interview.

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Speaker 3: Other people in Hell and for all attorney. We all

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know the pitch.

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Speaker 1: Chris, how was hate sgiving for you?

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Speaker 3: Terrible? But not in like the fun hell kind of

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terrible way. He was awful.

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Speaker 2: My mom invited a bunch of dudes over, slept with

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them all on the dinner table.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I took pictures. Yeah, I know, yeah you were there.

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I don't know how you got the invite, but I

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guess my mom.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: There's a lot of a lot of talk about politics.

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Oh that's pretty typical for those kind of gatherings.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, how did it go? Not great?

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Speaker 2: Because there's only two political parties here in Hell. My

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brothers in my party, yeah, and I have he has

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the superior political campaign.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, let me know it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, because there's all how many people are in

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your party? Leave it for me, right, I mean I

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didn't know there was a vote. Let's just say two

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we're gonna get all right?

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Speaker 3: Maybe three? Two or three?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sure stalling through me vote. Maybe I don't know. Yeah,

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well I.

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Speaker 1: Don't know if he votes either, he's more dictatorship.

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Speaker 3: Yeah that's true.

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Speaker 2: Okay, two, we got to two supporters, all right, so yeah,

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you know, it's an uphill battle, but it's it's kind

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of like a grassroots kind of campaign. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

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we're we're gonna after this. I think you and I

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can go canvas the neighborhood and uh and.

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Speaker 3: Get some more voters. How does that sound?

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Speaker 1: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: When's the election six hundred and sixty six years from now? Okay, yeah,

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they got some time. Yeah, we got some time, but

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we can get some fundraisers. See what happens.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, who knows, guys.

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Speaker 2: I got a question on Twitter? Where do you put

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this is from persona Wolf? Where do you put gingers

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if they have no soul? Asking for a friend? Oh well,

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persona Wolf? That's actually highly offensive making fun of gingers.

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Wait wait, so yeah, that's it's terribly offensive to make

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fun of people with red hair.

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Speaker 3: They can't control that.

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Speaker 1: So mean. But I thought they didn't have souls.

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Speaker 2: No, they have souls. It's a shitty joke. It's really rude. Yeah, okay,

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you you should be you should feel bad. I didn't

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even make the joke.

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Speaker 3: Well, you perpetuated it, You're you're just as much to blame.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry.

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Speaker 2: Anyways, if a ginger does go to hell, though, we

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actually have special punishment for them. They we have a

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more intense sun because of their pale, pasty skin. We

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make fun of them for their freckles. We call them weasleys,

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you know, like Harry Potter. They're just normal people. We

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all hate them, but you know, they're normal people, so

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you shouldn't be offensive.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: The people that don't have souls actually are the ones

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that dye their hair red or blue or green. Those

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are the people that don't have souls. They don't have no, no, yeah,

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they gave them up, just like their creativity.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Is it a thing where they don't have souls to

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begin with, or they lose their soul whenever they dye

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their hair. Yeah, it's like signing a pact with Satan.

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They dye their hair, lose their soul. Oh yeah.

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Speaker 1: Is it just the fine print of the dye.

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Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 2: Next time you check your mabe Lean bottle or whatever, Yeah,

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it says at the very bottom, made in China, unfortunately,

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and uh, you're selling your soul to Satan.

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Speaker 3: What else you got either?

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Speaker 2: We have a request from a Steven he wrote into

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hot mail. Can we get Blaine Gibson on the show?

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Speaker 3: Who's that?

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Speaker 2: Well?

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Speaker 3: I never heard of him?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, kind of a nobody.

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Speaker 3: Oh, I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I mean with a name like that, I mean he

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sounds he sounds like somebody.

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Speaker 1: No, he's the kind of a nobody.

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Speaker 4: No.

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Speaker 3: Well, I'm sure he's a nice guy.

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Speaker 1: I don't know.

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Speaker 3: Do you know him? Is any relation to you or yeah?

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I know Earth friend?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I know him back on Earth. I wouldn't call

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him a friend.

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Speaker 3: Noll would you call him?

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Speaker 1: Uh? Just kind of one of those people that you

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have to know because you work closely with him?

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Speaker 3: Interesting?

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Speaker 2: Any like specific traits that you know describe him? Handsome, funny, annoying, muscular,

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obsessed with his physique? Interesting, Yeah, yeah, that's that. Actually

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that means right, yeah yeah, and then uh, very insecure.

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M I don't know about that. That's kind of presumptuous there, Chris,

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I don't I don't know. So yeah, I don't think

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we'll ever have him on the show. Yeah, yeah, just

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because he's probably really busy and he sounds really popular

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and you probably just can't put him.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Probably Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Another question got one more? Yeah, one more, one more

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from the hot mail. This is from fi More. This

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question to Clayton. Do you get furries in Hell? Oh? Yeah, absolutely,

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if you are a furry, it's instant sentence down here.

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Really Yeah, and we turn up the heat wherever you are,

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really crank it. They're basically wearing a full body sweater.

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We make them roast inside that thing.

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Speaker 1: So there's never any in heaven. No.

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Speaker 3: No.

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Speaker 2: Do you think you'd see some guy yiffing or whatever

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it is up in heaven? I think so. I don't

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think being a furry makes you a bad person. I

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do I think it makes you a weird person.

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Speaker 1: I don't think so. I mean, I think it'd be

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really cool to see someone up in heaven and a squirrel.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm sure.

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Speaker 1: Sure, a squirrel mascot with flying Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I'm sure Jesus is up there prancing around, you know,

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holding Princess Diana's hand in one and then some fucking

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squirrel in the other.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, singing Kumbaya. I don't know. That kind of ruins

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my vision of heaven personally.

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Speaker 1: I don't know. If you're the target audience, it's.

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Speaker 2: True, but I don't see I don't remember anything in

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the Bible about furries.

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Speaker 1: Well that means it's not necessarily wrong.

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Speaker 3: It doesn't mean it's right.

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Speaker 1: All right.

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Speaker 2: Well, they get chocked up with the body pillow kids, okay, yeah,

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the kids that worn't carry those like body pillows around.

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Speaker 3: We actually issue those out whenever you come to hell.

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You got yours, right, my body pillow? Yeah? What printed

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you get on yours?

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Speaker 4: Uh?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I got James Gandalfini.

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Speaker 2: Ohrano collect that's a limited edition one. Yeah, yeah, no,

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because it also smells like James Gundelfini. Oh yeah, that's

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that's yeah. We stuff it with the body hair of

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James Gundelfini.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, rest in peace? Is he in Heaven or hell?

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Speaker 3: He's in Heaven's great? All right?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you see he's on the Sopranos, right yeah, yeah,

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that's a great show.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I think they're making a movie really yeah with his son.

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Oh I thought you meant in Heaven. No, no, on Earth,

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the Earth rom they're the ones that make them. That's Hollywood.

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This is actually true. They're making they're making it. They're

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making a Serrano's movie. I don't know what else to say,

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there's no there's no comedy behind that.

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Speaker 3: That's just I'm breaking news here on Good Morning from Here.

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Speaker 2: You heard it first, Yeah, well you didn't hear it

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first because I read it in like a variety article.

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But I'm just repeating what I said. I guess, I

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guess We're not gonna open up that movie podcast that

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we talked about. We're just gonna stick to our guns

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on Good Morning from Hell. All right, So I'm really

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excited about this next segment because we have our first

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ever Good Morning from Hell unboxing.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, we got our merchandise available for purchase.

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Speaker 2: That's right, I said, Chris, I want some awesome badass shirts.

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I want them to like be red, like the blood

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of the Infidels, and like in like super metal cool

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badass texts, say like hal Clayton, and then like all

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of our demons and all of our followers are gonna

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wear them. I'm so excited to see what you came

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up with. Yeah, all right, give me that box, give

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me here, Okay, hit me here, all right, give my

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box cutter.

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Speaker 3: We'll put it up. And uh, the fuck? Is this?

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What is this?

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Speaker 1: That's that's red?

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Speaker 3: This is this is pink Chris, this is pink. It's

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clearly not red. No, that's that is that's red. I'm

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holding it up to the light and it look pink.

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You what is it? What is that fought? Is that

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the gut milk fought?

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Speaker 4: Now?

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Speaker 3: I don't know what fun I just Chris, what what

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did you do? You fucked the whole thing up. No,

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it's a nice shirt. It's nice.

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Speaker 2: And this shirt sucks, Chris, I had you order six million,

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six hundred sixty six thousand, six hundred and sixty six

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of these.

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Speaker 3: How are we gonna sell pink shirts? Chris?

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Speaker 2: People like pink shirts? No, No one likes pink shirts.

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Got No, it's a good shirt. It's a good it's

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a good shirt.

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Speaker 3: Okay.

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Speaker 1: And look, you're the one who told me to order

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six hundred and sixty six million of all six million.

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Speaker 2: Six hundred and sixty six six sex six ex Chris,

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what that okay? We have to destroy all of them. No,

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look on the order site it looked red. That are

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you your color blinds? You're color blind? I'm looking at

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it right now. That's pink, it says right there.

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Speaker 1: It's just pink.

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Speaker 3: Why didn't read the fine print on the T shirt. Oh,

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these are never gonna see the light to day. I

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don't want these souls. The monks turned out really good.

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Speaker 2: But the mugs o cool. Look at the logoyat this out. Okay,

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throw these bucks at you. You're gonna be eating mug

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sharks our years. Dang.

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Speaker 3: Okay, look well those turned out good and you're breaking

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all of them are.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well it's it doesn't mean we're gonna eat all

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the costs of these things anyways, there's no way.

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Speaker 3: All right, well, they the mugs look great.

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Speaker 1: They got the show logo and they got good morning

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from Hell, and that looks great.

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Speaker 3: Pink shirts, pink my least favorite color. Slightish red.

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Speaker 2: Eat another mug, out, eat another out? All right, good,

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all right, gonna bring myself back down. Listen to what

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my psychiat said, Siegmund Freud.

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Speaker 1: Who's our guest for?

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Speaker 2: Actually, I brought on a great, great friend of ours.

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He's really popular down here in Hell. He's the lead

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chef down here in Hell. Come on in, Guy Ferrari,

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Poe Criszy Clayton, my two favorite guys.

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Speaker 3: How you doing, guys? Good, great guy? How are you wait?

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Speaker 2: Wait?

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Speaker 3: Guy Ferrari, that's my name, don't wear it out. Hell,

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what's up?

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Speaker 1: There's a guy Ferrari. You look a little different.

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Speaker 4: Well, you know, up and on earth, everybody's different off camera, dude, No, no, no,

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you must be.

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Speaker 2: Thinking a guy Fieri. Oh well no, guy, we can

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we can tell Chris. Okay, it's your it's your alter ego.

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Speaker 1: It's me.

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Speaker 3: You know, he paints himself white.

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Speaker 4: I go white face because that's cool down here. But

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totally cool with that. But you know, I make some

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trips up there.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I pop in.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I got a pretty good following up there. It's

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pretty popular.

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Speaker 2: And uh yeah, that explains the white horns. Oh yeah,

246
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you got not not a die jeb. People think it's

247
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a die job. It's not.

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Speaker 3: It's natural. It's all natural. Yeah, it's a spike tip.

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I was born that way. Yeah.

250
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Speaker 1: So you have how many horns? Is that? That's? I mean,

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you've only got just the two.

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Speaker 4: I couldn't even count them. You know, there's too many

253
00:09:49,679 --> 00:09:52,679
to count, you know. He who's to say. I'm not

254
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saying that's you know, I'm not saying that makes me better.

255
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But I'm just saying, you know, there is the thing

256
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that I have.

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Speaker 2: It was born with it it's pretty. Yeah, it's pretty cool.

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Speaker 3: It's very sick. I'm jealous. It's pretty. It's pretty sick.

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Speaker 2: I got some I got sweet shirts, and I've seen him.

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Speaker 1: You know.

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Speaker 4: I like to do flames a lot. Big fan of Hell,

262
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big fan, big fan. You know what's going on down here,

263
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and uh, you know, I like to represent.

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Speaker 3: I'm the top. They don't know. If I hadn't told

265
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you that, you probably would have had no idea.

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Speaker 2: I had sky and diskies, I would not have known.

267
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So Guy, we actually sent him up he's like in

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an agent for Hell. We wanted to make it as

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unhealthy as possible up on the Earth. Throw you guys

270
00:10:26,600 --> 00:10:28,679
are getting too healthy with this like whole vegan movement.

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So we send guy up there, and he's he's a

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great work.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, you know, I appreciate the sport that I got

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down here, you know, because up there it's crazy, you know,

275
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and people are trying, they're trying to run, you know,

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they're trying to live. You know, it's like I'm gonna

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cut out meats. So I go up there, I double down,

278
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I triple down. You know, fry this deep fry that

279
00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:48,240
you know, cover that in grease. You know, why can't

280
00:10:48,279 --> 00:10:50,159
we wrap that in a ball of cheese, you know,

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and they suck it down, you know, the humans up there,

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they just love it, you know. So it's just like

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00:10:55,919 --> 00:10:57,360
eat this, eat that, bom you're dead.

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Speaker 3: Boom. No, well you don't say boom. That's right.

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Speaker 4: Well, you know, fuck that guy. Don't even be started

286
00:11:03,279 --> 00:11:05,759
on that guy. I'm pretty sure he's a demon.

287
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Speaker 3: You know, I hate him.

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Speaker 1: Person, so he's a demon too.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, he's a piece of shit. I'll tell you that.

290
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Speaker 4: I don't know if he's a demon or not, but

291
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I fucking hate him. You know, I don't know why

292
00:11:13,720 --> 00:11:15,639
he gets all the street cred. I'm over here. How

293
00:11:15,679 --> 00:11:19,000
many TV shows he's got. People people recognize me, you know,

294
00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:20,559
they see me as everybody's making fun of me. I

295
00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:21,440
don't really understand that.

296
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Speaker 2: I don't know.

297
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Speaker 3: I'm a big joke.

298
00:11:23,000 --> 00:11:25,120
Speaker 4: This guy, he's a be He's a big chef, big

299
00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:27,320
chef guy. You know, he gets a boom bab boom whatever,

300
00:11:27,360 --> 00:11:29,799
he's gonna catch phrase. Everybody loves him. He has a

301
00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:30,519
bunch of nonsense.

302
00:11:30,919 --> 00:11:33,679
Speaker 2: I mean, if I saw a guy in Emerald in

303
00:11:33,759 --> 00:11:35,559
a crowd, I know which one I'd spot.

304
00:11:35,639 --> 00:11:39,159
Speaker 3: Quicker guy yeah, look at me. I'm on fire. You

305
00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:42,799
see my hair, I'm on fire, golden tips, flame red shirt.

306
00:11:43,320 --> 00:11:44,440
He recognize me immediately.

307
00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:47,639
Speaker 2: Boom there a yeah, always on fire. So how did

308
00:11:47,679 --> 00:11:49,919
you become the number one chef in hell?

309
00:11:50,360 --> 00:11:52,159
Speaker 3: You know it's you know, it's not that complicated.

310
00:11:52,519 --> 00:11:55,360
Speaker 4: You cook up some good dishes, you know, uh, holy

311
00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:57,600
mostrom Bowlie used to throw a bunch of stuff together.

312
00:11:58,159 --> 00:11:58,679
Speaker 3: People love it.

313
00:11:58,759 --> 00:12:01,120
Speaker 4: Get the blood and guts, Yeah, I deal mostly in

314
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:03,360
bones down here. Up there, they're like the fat and

315
00:12:03,440 --> 00:12:04,679
the grease, you know.

316
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Speaker 3: Then hopefully I filled the hole until they drop dead.

317
00:12:08,000 --> 00:12:10,519
Thank god. Yeah, not to use that word, you know,

318
00:12:10,559 --> 00:12:10,919
I'm sorry.

319
00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:13,320
Speaker 4: It's a curse word down here, but you know, fill

320
00:12:13,360 --> 00:12:16,279
themuntil they're done down here, you know it's open season.

321
00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:19,000
I do a lot of animal based food, you know

322
00:12:19,120 --> 00:12:23,360
that dog cat. You know it's uh, you know what's

323
00:12:23,399 --> 00:12:26,080
rarely used is cooking on the souls. You could sole

324
00:12:26,159 --> 00:12:29,639
up saute it. You want to a three hundred and

325
00:12:29,639 --> 00:12:33,159
fifty degrees for two to three hours a soul?

326
00:12:33,360 --> 00:12:33,519
Speaker 3: Yeah?

327
00:12:33,559 --> 00:12:36,200
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's delicious. It's absolutely delicious tasty.

328
00:12:36,279 --> 00:12:38,519
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it's just really good. What do they taste like?

329
00:12:38,679 --> 00:12:40,639
Speaker 2: It's kind of like a bread in a way that

330
00:12:40,720 --> 00:12:42,480
it's like kind of like hollow, like a kind of

331
00:12:42,519 --> 00:12:44,480
like a pocket of nice air.

332
00:12:44,799 --> 00:12:47,120
Speaker 1: Hot Pocket, Yeah, it tastes like hot pockets.

333
00:12:47,759 --> 00:12:49,519
Speaker 4: You know, we're not gonna say it's hot pocket. You know,

334
00:12:49,639 --> 00:12:51,279
it's kind of in tilting my craft a little bit,

335
00:12:52,279 --> 00:12:54,159
you know. But like if hot Pocket wanted to taste

336
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,120
like a soul, they they you know, they would copy meat.

337
00:12:56,320 --> 00:12:58,919
Speaker 3: So I feel like that's what you're experiencing. You're experiencing them.

338
00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:01,799
Speaker 4: You know, they got the h the guy Ferrari, that's

339
00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:03,960
my name, and they uh, you know, they taste the

340
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:05,399
soul and they say, how do we how do we

341
00:13:05,519 --> 00:13:06,080
recreate that?

342
00:13:06,759 --> 00:13:08,080
Speaker 2: So they go with a lot of bread and cheese.

343
00:13:08,360 --> 00:13:10,120
But you know I perfected that with human souls.

344
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:11,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

345
00:13:12,039 --> 00:13:14,279
Speaker 3: You know a lot of a lot of people up there, you.

346
00:13:14,320 --> 00:13:17,440
Speaker 4: Know, and they're you know, the these fucking vegans. You know,

347
00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:20,360
they're about you know, cage's free, you know, corn fed

348
00:13:20,960 --> 00:13:23,799
all that. Nah, I'm I go the opposite, you know,

349
00:13:23,960 --> 00:13:28,320
meat and cheese and pesticides, Oh god, pesticides, they make

350
00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:29,480
a human taste amazing.

351
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Speaker 3: Yeh.

352
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:31,159
Speaker 4: Yeah.

353
00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:33,200
Speaker 2: Guy has the smallest gages that he keeps all of

354
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his things and brings up the flavor. Yeah, they have

355
00:13:36,559 --> 00:13:38,000
to willow in their filth and then it's just kind

356
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:39,039
of tasting filth.

357
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Speaker 4: Filth is it is an unbelievable asset sugar and spice.

358
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:44,720
Filth is where it's at. You want to roll it

359
00:13:44,759 --> 00:13:46,360
in dirt, you know, maybe cover it in a little

360
00:13:46,360 --> 00:13:52,360
bit of piss and ship. I'm getting wet just thinking

361
00:13:52,360 --> 00:13:53,440
about it. I'll be honest.

362
00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:56,279
Speaker 3: He is, he is, I can see him. Pardon.

363
00:13:57,919 --> 00:14:00,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, so guys actually opened up a lot of slow

364
00:14:00,480 --> 00:14:01,519
food restaurants down here.

365
00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:02,320
Speaker 1: Food.

366
00:14:02,440 --> 00:14:05,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like fast you wait, an attornity, yeah, you know,

367
00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:07,519
and it's not worth it. It's not worth it at all.

368
00:14:07,559 --> 00:14:10,039
It really isn't. But hell so you're having what else

369
00:14:10,039 --> 00:14:12,679
are you gonna do? Bitch? Yeah, he's you know, murder

370
00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:14,000
king pizza.

371
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:18,320
Speaker 2: Slut mcdongles, mcdonals, mcdonals, Yeah, dongle do you're right?

372
00:14:19,200 --> 00:14:22,080
Speaker 3: You know I'm hating it. Yeah, you're up late. What

373
00:14:22,159 --> 00:14:25,120
are you gonna do? Donalds? Suck down a dong you know,

374
00:14:25,399 --> 00:14:26,759
That's That's what I'm playing off of.

375
00:14:27,039 --> 00:14:28,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, so what do they served at mcdonalls.

376
00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:31,679
Speaker 2: If I'm correct, you serve like only fish flats? But

377
00:14:31,879 --> 00:14:34,200
it's made from fish from the River Dicks. So it's

378
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:35,600
fish from the river Dicks.

379
00:14:35,720 --> 00:14:35,919
Speaker 1: Yeah.

380
00:14:36,120 --> 00:14:38,399
Speaker 4: Oh, they're swimming around there, they're they're biting at you.

381
00:14:39,519 --> 00:14:42,639
Enormous amount of deaths reported from the fish. I love

382
00:14:42,679 --> 00:14:45,080
it personally. That's where I get most of my most

383
00:14:45,120 --> 00:14:45,759
of my meat supply.

384
00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:46,519
Speaker 2: You know.

385
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:49,080
Speaker 4: People can buy all hours of the night. They're not

386
00:14:49,200 --> 00:14:52,360
loving it, you know, and that's uh, that's it's what's

387
00:14:52,519 --> 00:14:53,440
it's what sustains me.

388
00:14:53,559 --> 00:14:53,679
Speaker 2: Here.

389
00:14:53,879 --> 00:14:55,840
Speaker 1: Give the people what they don't want. That's that's where

390
00:14:55,879 --> 00:14:56,080
to win.

391
00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:57,600
Speaker 3: You give the people what they don't want. You know,

392
00:14:57,679 --> 00:14:59,600
it gets to be hard personally.

393
00:15:01,919 --> 00:15:04,639
Speaker 1: Oh absolutely, you know, man, I do not know much

394
00:15:04,639 --> 00:15:05,600
about demon anatomy.

395
00:15:06,519 --> 00:15:06,879
Speaker 3: What else?

396
00:15:06,960 --> 00:15:11,279
Speaker 2: What other restaurants you've opened up, jizns you've heard of nos?

397
00:15:11,399 --> 00:15:12,919
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm quite proud.

398
00:15:12,720 --> 00:15:13,679
Speaker 4: Of that, you know.

399
00:15:14,320 --> 00:15:16,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, dare I ask what you serve it? Giz knows,

400
00:15:16,919 --> 00:15:17,399
what do you think?

401
00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:20,840
Speaker 3: Yeah? You're eating it? That's exactly right.

402
00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:25,320
Speaker 4: Okay, all right, now come on in, sit down, and

403
00:15:25,399 --> 00:15:28,840
I'll fill you up fresh match every order.

404
00:15:29,120 --> 00:15:30,960
Speaker 3: People think hell's easy. It's not easy.

405
00:15:31,639 --> 00:15:31,799
Speaker 4: You know.

406
00:15:32,039 --> 00:15:36,799
Speaker 3: I'm pounding away. It's hot every order. It's hot and ready.

407
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:40,879
Speaker 2: It's fresh. Oh great sounds man, I can't wait to

408
00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:44,000
check one out. You see, we've also got a blight

409
00:15:44,159 --> 00:15:48,480
castle in ingut in in what in ingout gout So

410
00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:51,279
Pizza slut, Yeah, it's it's a it's a place that

411
00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:53,600
you go. We serve you really shitty pizza. And there's

412
00:15:53,600 --> 00:15:54,559
also a prostitution ring.

413
00:15:54,919 --> 00:15:56,440
Speaker 3: Yeah. Oh yeah, it's like.

414
00:15:56,440 --> 00:15:59,159
Speaker 2: An escort service, but pizza. Oh you can't get a

415
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:04,080
better value for one special. Yeah, drug competitor with Dominos

416
00:16:04,240 --> 00:16:04,919
domin Hose.

417
00:16:05,039 --> 00:16:05,240
Speaker 1: Yeah.

418
00:16:05,519 --> 00:16:08,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, they just totally ripped off Pizza Slut whole mess

419
00:16:08,679 --> 00:16:12,039
to just miemare. But they have the garlic bread. They

420
00:16:12,159 --> 00:16:13,720
put the garlic paste on the crust.

421
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:17,440
Speaker 1: Oh, I mean yeah, that sounds good. Tweaked it way

422
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:20,080
better than giz Nose. I'll say that you.

423
00:16:20,120 --> 00:16:22,000
Speaker 3: Went there a lot, though I don't know about that.

424
00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:24,039
Speaker 1: No, I haven't been to jizz Nos.

425
00:16:24,240 --> 00:16:27,720
Speaker 3: You have other places. We have the receipts. I got

426
00:16:27,799 --> 00:16:29,720
your credit card, got it right here, Chris.

427
00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:34,080
Speaker 4: You are loving it, loving giz Nose, catching Mitch his nose.

428
00:16:34,200 --> 00:16:37,080
That's where Chris goes. That was the jiggle for the

429
00:16:37,120 --> 00:16:40,799
whole commercial. We based it around you dins where Chris goes, Yeah,

430
00:16:41,080 --> 00:16:41,879
fills his nose.

431
00:16:42,679 --> 00:16:46,919
Speaker 3: You got a big nose. It's absolutely huge and geared

432
00:16:46,960 --> 00:16:47,399
toward hill.

433
00:16:47,559 --> 00:16:48,919
Speaker 1: Is it when you go in, you're like, instead of

434
00:16:49,039 --> 00:16:50,639
supersize me, you're like, give me the Chris.

435
00:16:51,120 --> 00:16:52,559
Speaker 3: You got it? Like you don't know.

436
00:16:52,879 --> 00:16:55,840
Speaker 2: I appreciate you being facetious, but yeah, you've ordered the

437
00:16:55,879 --> 00:16:57,840
Chris many times, like an extra Chrispy.

438
00:16:59,159 --> 00:16:59,639
Speaker 3: That's just the.

439
00:16:59,679 --> 00:17:03,480
Speaker 2: Certain where it is, oh crispy. Yeah, that's just now

440
00:17:03,559 --> 00:17:06,119
he's catching it over. Took a minute, So Chris, I

441
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:07,960
mean you you you've been around have you Are there

442
00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:09,839
any restaurants that you've seen that you might be interested

443
00:17:09,880 --> 00:17:10,759
in trying out or anything?

444
00:17:11,440 --> 00:17:14,599
Speaker 1: I did notice a taco hell that sounds okay.

445
00:17:15,119 --> 00:17:16,680
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a pretty common one down here.

446
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:21,960
Speaker 2: We got a Slugways, Lugways, poop Eyes, hoop Eyes.

447
00:17:22,079 --> 00:17:24,960
Speaker 3: You're making me hungry, so I guess I can eat.

448
00:17:25,039 --> 00:17:27,079
I don't know if you know that I can eat.

449
00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:29,319
Speaker 2: Is it just a thing where people maybe go to

450
00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:33,039
poop Eyes and then stop by giz Nose for dessert?

451
00:17:33,799 --> 00:17:36,160
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's really It's a perfect system we got going

452
00:17:36,240 --> 00:17:40,359
on here with no nutrition, no nutritional value whatsoever, but

453
00:17:40,480 --> 00:17:43,000
you always leave hungry. That's my guarantee. So you go

454
00:17:43,079 --> 00:17:46,000
from one restaurant to the next, fill you up, you know,

455
00:17:46,119 --> 00:17:49,920
hopefully endgame is you're dead. Yeah, we use a corpse.

456
00:17:50,240 --> 00:17:52,000
We cooked that into the next meal. And this is

457
00:17:52,039 --> 00:17:54,680
how we may make a successful business. You know.

458
00:17:54,759 --> 00:17:56,680
Speaker 3: We we give one customer to the next.

459
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:57,559
Speaker 1: That's great.

460
00:17:57,559 --> 00:17:58,599
Speaker 3: It's literal synergy.

461
00:17:59,000 --> 00:18:02,000
Speaker 2: Get the pink special at Poop Eyes, that's right, Yeah,

462
00:18:02,039 --> 00:18:03,440
that's there, that's her, that's our favorite.

463
00:18:03,599 --> 00:18:04,599
Speaker 1: And then what else is there?

464
00:18:05,119 --> 00:18:06,759
Speaker 3: Oh, Wendy's Wendy's.

465
00:18:06,839 --> 00:18:10,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, really, try the spicy chicken sandwhich is amazing.

466
00:18:11,359 --> 00:18:12,640
Speaker 3: It's honestly amazing.

467
00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:14,799
Speaker 1: Just as we actually have that. We have that up

468
00:18:14,839 --> 00:18:15,119
on Earth.

469
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:16,160
Speaker 3: People give me a lot of shit.

470
00:18:16,440 --> 00:18:20,119
Speaker 2: I'm an entrepreneur, Okay, it's it's it's part of his heritage,

471
00:18:20,160 --> 00:18:24,720
you know, like guys from Flavortown, from Flavortown. Yeah, it's

472
00:18:24,720 --> 00:18:27,200
an actual place down here in hell Flavortown. What Yeah,

473
00:18:27,240 --> 00:18:28,599
doesn't you talk about it in the TV show?

474
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:31,359
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, Dinners drive in and Dies. Now the GOLDI

475
00:18:31,359 --> 00:18:33,359
The end of every episode is you drop dead and

476
00:18:33,440 --> 00:18:35,279
then we send you down here and then we cook

477
00:18:35,359 --> 00:18:35,799
you and eat you.

478
00:18:36,319 --> 00:18:36,559
Speaker 1: Yum.

479
00:18:37,240 --> 00:18:41,480
Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh absolutely, that's our cats phrase, yum, question mark.

480
00:18:42,799 --> 00:18:44,440
Speaker 1: Where's Flavortown located?

481
00:18:45,079 --> 00:18:47,400
Speaker 2: It's the neighborhood next door. It's like right over here,

482
00:18:47,480 --> 00:18:50,000
it's it's across the street. Chris, Oh yeah, you're you

483
00:18:50,079 --> 00:18:51,960
live near the only bathrooms in Hell, so you you

484
00:18:52,000 --> 00:18:52,359
should know.

485
00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:54,240
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, we see you.

486
00:18:55,839 --> 00:18:57,200
Speaker 1: We're waiting, we're waiting.

487
00:18:57,279 --> 00:18:58,279
Speaker 3: Come on in, man.

488
00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:01,880
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess there's there a sponsor, so I.

489
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:04,960
Speaker 3: Wonder it's not gonna be anymore. I don't want to

490
00:19:05,000 --> 00:19:08,640
get demonized. That's why you should be in charge right there.

491
00:19:09,680 --> 00:19:11,319
That's the kind of hit comedy. Yeah.

492
00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:16,279
Speaker 2: Thanks, guy, that's a really genuine what's a very very

493
00:19:16,359 --> 00:19:18,759
genuine guy we were talking mentioned him earlier had a

494
00:19:18,759 --> 00:19:21,279
friend named Blayane Gibson, and he was so focused on

495
00:19:21,319 --> 00:19:22,720
getting Blake Gibson.

496
00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:26,160
Speaker 4: That guy was a legend up on earth, big fat fatty.

497
00:19:26,519 --> 00:19:28,400
I'd point him out all the time. You're like, look

498
00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:30,359
at that fatso fa.

499
00:19:31,200 --> 00:19:31,680
Speaker 2: What it hurt?

500
00:19:31,880 --> 00:19:32,559
Speaker 3: I loved him.

501
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:37,200
Speaker 4: That he betrayed me, well betrayed. You got a gym membership,

502
00:19:37,599 --> 00:19:39,240
and honestly, my heart shatted.

503
00:19:39,880 --> 00:19:41,880
Speaker 3: I couldn't believe it. This one Gibson guy. You guys,

504
00:19:42,039 --> 00:19:42,759
you need to ease up.

505
00:19:42,799 --> 00:19:42,960
Speaker 2: On it.

506
00:19:43,079 --> 00:19:43,559
Speaker 3: He sounds like a.

507
00:19:43,599 --> 00:19:48,359
Speaker 2: Nice guy, this guy with whom I have no relationship.

508
00:19:48,839 --> 00:19:49,839
Speaker 3: Definitely, whatever he may be.

509
00:19:50,160 --> 00:19:52,599
Speaker 1: Are there any like cooking shows down in Hell?

510
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:53,119
Speaker 4: Uh?

511
00:19:53,240 --> 00:19:56,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's there's Heck's Kitchen, Hex's Kitchen. Yeah, it's like

512
00:19:56,799 --> 00:19:58,960
Hell's Kitchen. But we didn't get the rights to Hell's

513
00:19:59,000 --> 00:20:00,799
Kitchen because asked it's Yeah.

514
00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:02,640
Speaker 1: They took the rights to help his kitchen.

515
00:20:02,759 --> 00:20:04,119
Speaker 3: Yeah, Gordon Gordon did.

516
00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:07,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. He's a cunning businessman and all of our lawyers.

517
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:12,000
Wow yeah, I mean, guy, outside of of your cooking

518
00:20:12,279 --> 00:20:14,119
and you're you know, making people unhealthy up on the

519
00:20:14,160 --> 00:20:15,240
earth round, what else do you do?

520
00:20:15,319 --> 00:20:17,039
Speaker 3: What else? We are some of your hobbies and things

521
00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:19,920
you know? Well, yeah, I appreciate that, Clayton, thank you.

522
00:20:20,119 --> 00:20:23,440
I like to I like to sit around. Oh yeah,

523
00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:26,319
oh exist, okay mildly.

524
00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:30,839
Speaker 4: I feel like, you know, humans up there, as I've observed,

525
00:20:31,039 --> 00:20:33,559
they move around too much, and they expend a lot

526
00:20:33,599 --> 00:20:34,319
of energy.

527
00:20:34,640 --> 00:20:37,480
Speaker 3: Living and breathing. So I try to make up for

528
00:20:37,559 --> 00:20:39,839
that by just uh not moving.

529
00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:42,359
Speaker 4: From a single spot. I'd like to time myself for

530
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:44,039
a period to see how long I can go.

531
00:20:44,079 --> 00:20:47,599
Speaker 2: Without actually doing anything. It's marinating, yeah, merinating, in my

532
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:50,359
own filth. That's a good it's a very good descriptor.

533
00:20:50,599 --> 00:20:52,160
Speaker 1: You know, what's your record?

534
00:20:52,880 --> 00:20:56,119
Speaker 4: My record is four years and six days. Oh, and

535
00:20:56,279 --> 00:20:58,160
I'm honestly, you know, I'm going to open up in

536
00:20:58,160 --> 00:21:00,920
here a little bit. I'm embarrassed about that because I

537
00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:02,519
feel like I could do better than that, and I

538
00:21:02,640 --> 00:21:06,519
deserve better than that. And uh, you know what's wrong

539
00:21:06,599 --> 00:21:08,039
with just laying about.

540
00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:09,519
Speaker 3: In your own waist. I believe in you.

541
00:21:09,680 --> 00:21:10,680
Speaker 1: I think you can do it.

542
00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,440
Speaker 3: Some people call it wasting time. I call it wasting time.

543
00:21:14,599 --> 00:21:16,000
Speaker 1: Do you export up to Earth?

544
00:21:16,279 --> 00:21:16,400
Speaker 2: Oh?

545
00:21:16,519 --> 00:21:17,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, O.

546
00:21:17,519 --> 00:21:21,000
Speaker 2: My main exports down here in Hell. It's mayonnaise, ranch dressing,

547
00:21:21,599 --> 00:21:22,279
sour cream.

548
00:21:23,200 --> 00:21:26,440
Speaker 3: You know, cottage cheese, mayonnaise. They love it.

549
00:21:26,519 --> 00:21:30,160
Speaker 4: Hey, here's some disgusting congealed fat. They can't get enough

550
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:34,839
of it. I put in every dish I have accelerates

551
00:21:34,880 --> 00:21:35,240
death five.

552
00:21:36,119 --> 00:21:38,720
Speaker 1: Because you're famous, your world famous? What was like before

553
00:21:38,759 --> 00:21:41,839
your Hell famous? Yeah?

554
00:21:42,079 --> 00:21:43,559
Speaker 3: Guy Ferrari? You flattering?

555
00:21:43,640 --> 00:21:44,720
Speaker 1: What was your rise to fame?

556
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:44,960
Speaker 2: Like?

557
00:21:45,200 --> 00:21:47,640
Speaker 3: It was hot and spicy? Was my rise to fame?

558
00:21:47,759 --> 00:21:49,440
Speaker 4: You know? I was sent up there with a mission

559
00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:53,319
and I saw all these disgusting meat bags, and I thought,

560
00:21:53,359 --> 00:21:56,200
what's the fastest possible way to kill these people. Send

561
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:59,359
them downstairs, you know, it makes something useful out of

562
00:21:59,400 --> 00:22:04,279
the lives in their deaths and uh, just cholesterol.

563
00:22:05,119 --> 00:22:06,720
Speaker 3: Doing a great job and then suck it down.

564
00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:07,640
Speaker 2: You know.

565
00:22:07,880 --> 00:22:09,599
Speaker 3: It's just like, hey, you want to eat this triple

566
00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:13,680
bypass whatnot? Fuck it? And they love it. It doesn't

567
00:22:13,720 --> 00:22:15,400
make any sense. Hey, this will kill you.

568
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:16,200
Speaker 2: You want to eat it?

569
00:22:16,480 --> 00:22:19,200
Speaker 3: Yes, I will, and I'll pay handsomely for it. Yeah,

570
00:22:19,359 --> 00:22:20,680
so that's what they do.

571
00:22:21,279 --> 00:22:21,480
Speaker 1: Man.

572
00:22:21,759 --> 00:22:24,599
Speaker 2: I just couldn't imagine someone like whose job it is

573
00:22:24,799 --> 00:22:27,160
just to like eat fast food or something and then

574
00:22:27,319 --> 00:22:28,160
like talk about it.

575
00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:33,359
Speaker 4: It's unbelievable. These people are Cretons, Creton's. It depends on globe.

576
00:22:33,359 --> 00:22:37,160
You'run down here. We'll just call them fuck wads. But

577
00:22:37,359 --> 00:22:41,839
these people, they'll dedicate the whole podcasts going out eating food,

578
00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:42,880
talking about the food.

579
00:22:43,359 --> 00:22:46,759
Speaker 2: Man, it's unbelievable, and people listen to it. It's they

580
00:22:46,839 --> 00:22:49,640
don't and they shouldn't, you know.

581
00:22:49,839 --> 00:22:51,480
Speaker 4: But my goal at the end of the day is

582
00:22:51,519 --> 00:22:53,920
hopefully they burned hell, you know, and then they come

583
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:56,519
to my restaurant. I feed them, they die again. I

584
00:22:56,680 --> 00:22:59,039
use the body for the bones. The next people eat them.

585
00:22:59,240 --> 00:23:02,240
It's just a cycle, circle circle.

586
00:23:04,279 --> 00:23:06,960
Speaker 1: Who's who's the most delicious person that you've eaten?

587
00:23:07,480 --> 00:23:08,039
Speaker 3: Ginghis Khan?

588
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:11,559
Speaker 1: Kings k Yeah, delicious. What's he tastes like?

589
00:23:11,839 --> 00:23:14,559
Speaker 3: It tastes like the population because he fucked everybody.

590
00:23:15,240 --> 00:23:18,359
Speaker 2: So he's kind of like how they say everyone tastes

591
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:22,240
like chicken. Everybody everyone is out there saying in health.

592
00:23:22,519 --> 00:23:24,359
He got out there, he played the game.

593
00:23:24,559 --> 00:23:26,920
Speaker 1: So it's health's chicken is ginghis Khan?

594
00:23:27,400 --> 00:23:28,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's correct.

595
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:29,039
Speaker 1: Do you have any family?

596
00:23:29,319 --> 00:23:33,200
Speaker 4: I had him at a young age. But they were delicious. Oh,

597
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:36,160
I thank them for making me what I am today.

598
00:23:36,680 --> 00:23:38,359
They were hot and ready.

599
00:23:38,920 --> 00:23:40,640
Speaker 2: I don't want to speak ill of the dead, but

600
00:23:41,079 --> 00:23:42,240
there were some wicked thoughts.

601
00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:45,440
Speaker 1: Yeah. So they kind of gave back to the world

602
00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:46,160
in their own.

603
00:23:46,039 --> 00:23:49,519
Speaker 4: Way, absolutely, you know, through methane gas. That's what it's

604
00:23:49,559 --> 00:23:49,960
all about.

605
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:52,039
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sure there's a whole special place in hell

606
00:23:52,079 --> 00:23:54,400
for the people who just want to breathe that in. So,

607
00:23:54,559 --> 00:23:57,279
are you here to promote one of your restaurants.

608
00:23:56,839 --> 00:23:58,079
Speaker 3: Or oh you know that I am.

609
00:23:58,839 --> 00:24:03,240
Speaker 4: Obviously it's just the Monday Fun Day Chris Special. Woh

610
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:04,119
that Chris Special.

611
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:04,400
Speaker 1: That's you.

612
00:24:04,559 --> 00:24:06,000
Speaker 3: Oh, I didn't tell him about a guy. I assume

613
00:24:06,039 --> 00:24:08,480
that's why he was here. Yeah, no, no, So gonna

614
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,160
be a bit of a surprise on Good Morning from Hell.

615
00:24:10,599 --> 00:24:14,599
Speaker 2: But basically, Chris guy has a Monday special and yours,

616
00:24:14,640 --> 00:24:17,000
I mean entree, like you're we're gonna serve you up.

617
00:24:17,119 --> 00:24:19,880
Speaker 4: Oh, we're gonna base you all the kind of grease

618
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:22,960
and fat and slop, you know, and then the people

619
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,160
are gonna fucking.

620
00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:24,680
Speaker 3: Tell you the shreds.

621
00:24:24,799 --> 00:24:27,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, we're got a whole packed full of demons and

622
00:24:27,799 --> 00:24:30,720
they're just gonna eat you up. You'll be okay, you'll survive,

623
00:24:30,799 --> 00:24:32,880
you'll regenerate, but then we'll serve you in the next week,

624
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:34,599
and then the following week, and then the week after that.

625
00:24:34,839 --> 00:24:38,000
Speaker 3: It'll be every Monday. You're gonna be So it's a hit. Yeah,

626
00:24:38,519 --> 00:24:40,160
you gotta get the people what they want, and then

627
00:24:40,240 --> 00:24:42,640
what they want is your you know, they want you.

628
00:24:43,039 --> 00:24:45,599
Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll start you out like it's like a special

629
00:24:45,960 --> 00:24:48,119
menu kind of thing, like, oh, it's the it's the

630
00:24:48,200 --> 00:24:49,559
mcrib's m Chris.

631
00:24:50,000 --> 00:24:51,799
Speaker 3: Mc Chris, Chris. It's limited time.

632
00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:54,359
Speaker 4: But here's the thing, it's not it's not really We're

633
00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:56,519
gonna keep bringing it back. Yeah, we're just gonna tear

634
00:24:56,599 --> 00:25:00,640
your ass to shreds. Theyre're just gonna go still on you.

635
00:25:01,759 --> 00:25:03,839
Speaker 1: I guess that's something that that'll happen.

636
00:25:03,960 --> 00:25:06,680
Speaker 3: Huh, Yeah, it's gonna happen. It's already happening. Well, we

637
00:25:06,720 --> 00:25:08,839
don't have to. We got a first customer right here. Oh,

638
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:10,079
they're lining up out the door.

639
00:25:10,799 --> 00:25:11,839
Speaker 1: Well, we don't have to end the show.

640
00:25:12,839 --> 00:25:14,799
Speaker 3: We can though. Yeah, no, this has gone long enough.

641
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:16,119
We need to serve you up. There's a bunch of

642
00:25:16,200 --> 00:25:20,960
hungry demons out there. Hey, who wants Chris made? Look

643
00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:22,960
a listening to that. I hope you're ready, Chris? Are

644
00:25:22,960 --> 00:25:23,279
you ready?

645
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:24,039
Speaker 4: No?

646
00:25:24,279 --> 00:25:26,759
Speaker 2: All right, well guy, thanks for coming by, Chris, thanks

647
00:25:26,799 --> 00:25:29,119
for having me. Yeah, this has been good morning from hell.

648
00:25:29,359 --> 00:25:31,720
Make sure you tell your friends about us. We're obviously

649
00:25:31,720 --> 00:25:34,599
a very family friendly podcast. Everyone can listen.

650
00:25:34,839 --> 00:25:41,000
Speaker 3: I guess I'll go outside now, assume the position Hall Clinton. Hey, guys.

651
00:25:41,119 --> 00:25:44,079
Speaker 2: Our special guest this week was Michael Jones, who has

652
00:25:44,160 --> 00:25:45,960
a brand new podcast called

