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Speaker 1: Scarlet Hampton my guest for the evening. You know exactly

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where you can find her at. Scarlet Hampton links to

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all of our social media the of everything in the

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episode description below. Please make sure you support the creators

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that come on our show, otherwise they stop coming on

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our show. So Scarlet, thank you so much for coming

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on with me tonight.

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Speaker 2: I appreciate it.

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Speaker 1: This is the first time a guy's gotten really sweaty

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with you and hasn't really enjoyed it. Unfortunately. I think

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I've enjoyed talking to you. I hate being fucking sweaty

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right now. And I think most of the guys on

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set who are getting sweaty with you are enjoying it

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more than I am.

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Speaker 3: And I doubt they're enjoying it because I go hard,

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like I recently was laughing. I mean, I'm not a feminist,

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and that's why I think I've been able to get

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along with some.

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Speaker 2: Boys that.

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Speaker 3: I just kind of learned more through, learn life lessons through.

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But I feel I'll always respect. But I also feel

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like in the end they tell me that.

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Speaker 2: It's my problem, not yours, you know, And that's basically

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what I heard this week. And I don't even get personal.

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Speaker 3: But I you know, that's why I think it's good

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that por styleists.

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Speaker 2: You know, we shouldn't we shouldn't fall in love.

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Speaker 3: But you know, that was the first time, and I

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feel like I never had a relationship. And I got

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into the adult industry a few months after I lost my.

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Speaker 2: I uh, you know, the forty minas twenty year old

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movie with Steve Carell. But oh, I have the college

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girl and I'm just Wisconsin.

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Speaker 1: Let me let me say this, Scarlett. Before we started recording, Scarlett,

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you said, you know, I keep it PG protecting. You're

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more than welcome to say literally any and everything you want. Okay,

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curse you, fuck, we can fuck. But I don't you know,

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I don't mean that. You do whatever you need to do,

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so you I really respect it.

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Speaker 3: Let me on the whatever podcast I said there was.

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They had to actually cut it twice during the time

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I was there, and I didn't know that it was

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a debate podcast. So the first time they cut it,

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I'm sitting in the corner and I'm just being I'm

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just feeling dejected because I don't I'm not a bully,

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and I didn't go on to a podcast and drive

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and a half hours and be excited to be there

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to support the adult industry. And then right away they're

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asking the girls around me about their relationships and what

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fake boob job they got, and and then I'm just

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sitting here like this, like I'm like a guy, almost

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like like I'm like this. And then I guess I

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got a nickname during that show. They called me Methany,

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and I thought that was hilarious because I rowed seven

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and a half hours and didn't eat, and that, you know,

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I was a bit cranky, you know, and women get

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cranky and angry, and my hangariness must have made me

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the talk of that little.

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Speaker 2: Show then, And to me, I got, I came, I left, and.

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Speaker 3: I undressed, and I redressed and I came back in

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the room and anyways, I jumped a hat a bit.

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But what happened was first time they cut that podcast,

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I was sitting like this, and when my legs crossed

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in the corner, and then none of the comments, nothing

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was happening. No one knows me. I wasn't talking, but

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I treat everyone respect and and you know, and I

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feel like they respect me too. And then at a

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certain point they say that they want to be good

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and they're trying to be good and they they can't.

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Speaker 2: They can't be around someone like me.

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Speaker 1: I think you're great to be around so far. I

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haven't been around you very long.

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Speaker 3: Actually, I think it's just like maybe I'm like Frank

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Booth and Blue Velvet when it's like names by Roy

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Orbison's playing.

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Speaker 2: And.

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Speaker 3: I was listening to the Blue Angel today. I was

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listening to Crying I'm Hurting All by Roy Orbison and

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it also a band of Stranger Shangerlas or something, and

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all that music just makes me cry the Rolly Stones,

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you know now using crying. Yeah, anyways, blah blah blah.

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I'm a huge music persontcha.

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Speaker 1: I don't know anything about music. I'm not a very

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good with.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: I hope I'm not a maniac because I know I'm

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not a sociopath or psychopath because I feel too strongly

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at certain points. But you know, when I went to

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college for a few years before I got in the industry,

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and that was right during COVID, so it was a

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good reason to leave college.

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Speaker 2: And you know, because I.

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Speaker 3: Didn't feel like I never had advisors in college, I

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never felt like I had a direction, I had no

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reason to believe in myself, and I had no.

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Speaker 2: Supportive figures.

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Speaker 3: I worked three jobs in like service, and my friends

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were people that I just worked with that would either

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boss me around or.

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Speaker 2: Or tell me I was too much of a flirt.

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And I think it's funny because I was a virgin

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all time and I never had a boyfriend, and I

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guess I was a flirt from the beginning, So you know,

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why not become a foreign stone.

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Speaker 3: I'm a Midwest polite girl, and I would just joke

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around with the Badger hockey team when they come into

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Jimmie John's at two am drunk and they would call

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me the Jimmie Johns girl. So I became the Jimmy

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Gunks girl because I still have my Jimmy John's vest

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and I put subs in the back of it. Get

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on my bicycle, and you know, I can't say bike

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because these motorcycles boys, they like to say.

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Speaker 2: That wasn't a bike. I said a paddle bike.

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Speaker 3: But I still like forty four miles a shift, so

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our INTL gas gas.

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Speaker 2: Anyways, that's totally off topic. You're good A bunch of different.

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Speaker 3: My life is like in all different weird aspects of

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weird directions, but a lot of things can inspire me

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and move me forward. And you know, the adult industry

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is always not it's not. I've been able to distinguish

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who I am and what I've done in the industry

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because I started doing just photography and it was all

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very natural, happy photos clothed just in Madison here on campus,

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just taking photos. And then one day my shirt blew

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open in the wind. And then there's these like events,

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you know, like you know in the seven year Inch

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at Me momoroe I was in trying. I was just

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wearing a Likenavy skirt and event was blown up and

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then the photographer's like, whoa, keep doing that? You should

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get in you know, the of So that's kind of

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how that started for me. I think twenty twenty, twenty

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twenty one, you know, around then.

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Speaker 1: So so you it seems like you were kind of

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all right. But at that point, are you still a

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virgin or no, like you said, you said you were

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being a flirt at the time, or were you like

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trying to feel yourself out?

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Speaker 3: And yeah, twenty one and things had change. I'm not

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no forty year old virgins. So what I did was.

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I was with this girl.

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Speaker 2: My friend.

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Speaker 3: You know, I'm just gonna say, Jay and news a

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girl and we went to the bar that I worked

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at because I was a shock girl. And that's how

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I had my first shot of anything. I never had

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any drugs but prozac. When I was a teenager, I

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was given blik and I depressed him because I grew

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up and grew will Wisconsin, and I was a perfectionist

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in sports, Like I was so hardcore an athlete.

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Speaker 2: I was doing like.

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Speaker 3: Three hundred crunches in the sauna and I waited till

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the sauna was like one hundred and thirty degrees until

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I was done, and then I would be on the

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elliptical for like thirty five minutes, hardcore, listening to music

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the entire time, and I wouldn't stop until there's a

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puddle sweat under me. But then I you know, the

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whole time, I was just like going hard and not

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thinking about any but like not friendships. I didn't prioritize

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people relationships. That's why I don't think I had boyfriends.

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And my mom said, maybe I just scared the boys

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a bit too much, because then I would go home.

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I would play guitar and I would sing like I

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call it scream.

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Speaker 2: Oh, but.

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Speaker 3: Some guys and bands say that it's more that I

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know that. They say it's more like a grunge like

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I was inspired by Courtney Love and L seven and

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of course like bands like that as a teenage, so

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I started learning to teach myself how to sing like

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a vocal fry type voice. So then I started poisting

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that and then I still have the same Instagram I

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had when I was like fourteen, so it was taken

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away when I had a photo not related to the

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adult industry, but it was related to the photography when

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I had like leaves, like I had these fall leaves.

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It was just a pretty artsy photo and the fall

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leaves were just covering my body like this, and I

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had them this and nothing was showing. And then it

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says this was flagged for underage and inappropriate content. And

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I always find it interesting, and I mean, I'm proud

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to be on barely Legal. But I was already, you know,

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it was already. I was not eighteen, and I mean

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I wasn't I was twenty twenty one, but still I'd

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been through a couple of years of college, been through

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like service jobs, learned how to work hard, we learn

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to work ethic. And both of my parents were self employed.

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So I grew up working on my dad's tree farm

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out in like ten degree weather and loaded trees on cars.

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But I learned that I became a good salesperson, you

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know what I mean, And I could talk someone into

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buying a Christmas tree. These are fresh cut, This one's

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little bushy. This the balls and further pretty were you know,

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and then the Fraser firs and then you know, and

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these ones. Don't get this one it's poky. But if

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you want a white pine in your house, go for it.

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They're nice looking trees. So I knew how to sell

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Christmas trees, you know. So like that's kind of things

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started that I have to you know, other jobs whatever.

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Speaker 2: Off topic.

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Speaker 3: But a lot of people like get it wrong about

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people in the adult industry that and I wouldn't disagree

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with them, because nowadays, I feel like the adult industry

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is changing. It's not what it has been because of

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the way of and these content creators and these TikTokers,

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and the mainstream vibe of being in the adult industry

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is now becoming so glamorized to a point where there's

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no time for anyone to pause and actually understand what

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they're doing. Where I spent a lot of time thinking

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about it because when I was in high school, I

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was reached out. There used to be one of these

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campsites that would just go find cute pictures of girls

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and they would message them. And right when I turned eighteen,

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I thought about getting on a campsite, not like what

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I didn't consider it porn, but it was just like

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talking to people on a camera. But I found that

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had to be more humiliating because the first time I

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did it, I was I was in my dorm room

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and I ended up I still have the table too.

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I ended up just using the lego of the table

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over there and just putting on a show with it.

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And I mean I was a v rig and h

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I mean I.

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Speaker 2: Made more money than I made.

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Speaker 3: Probably working at I worked at a Quick Trip here in

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the Midwest.

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Speaker 2: It's a big thing.

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Speaker 3: And I love that job because but I gained weight

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because I drank too many capsules. I love the cab,

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I love coffee, but now I barely drinking.

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Speaker 2: I drink soda.

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Speaker 3: And right now I got an Atkins Protein shake because

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I do keto like I. That's one thing too, is

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a lot of people get us wrong, is that we're

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like unhealthy people.

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Speaker 2: But I've always been a runner. And yeah, I mean like.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, let me ask, let me ask. So you played music, right?

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Have you always had like a performance aspect to you?

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Speaker 2: Like, yeah, I did.

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Speaker 1: Maybe maybe not porn, but maybe if when you were younger,

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if I met you, I would think like, oh, this

241
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girl is going to do something in front of people someday,

242
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whether it's theater or blah blah blah. Oh you always

243
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had that about you.

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Speaker 3: And I don't want to say I did, but I

245
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was a kid that I would just not want to

246
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be around people, but I would be orchestrating the games

247
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on the playground, okay, Like in I was the smart kid,

248
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Like I was a valedictorian, you know, I was the professionist.

249
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But I also was the one that was inspired by

250
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for months like it and music, and it touched me

251
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and it made me not feel so alone when you know,

252
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I grew up in a town with sixty people and

253
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we had a post office, and we had a church,

254
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and we didn't go to church. And it's not that

255
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:20,039
we weren't religious. It's just that, like I found myself

256
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:24,279
in the Wisconsin wintertime, I was I took the bus

257
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home from school, and I was always alone, and I

258
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didn't fit into a click, so I found myself alone

259
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a lot. So I got headphones and I just would

260
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spend that whole hour bus ride every night.

261
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Speaker 2: Listening to music.

262
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Speaker 3: And when I get home, I'm alone and it's dark,

263
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because in the winter time in the Midwest or anywhere,

264
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it gets dark. It for so if you get out

265
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of school at three seventeen and you're the last one

266
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off a bus ride that takes people all out here,

267
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and it's a tiresome and I found self getting depressed

268
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at that point. And I feel like the biggest issue

269
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with people and mental health is that if you're the

270
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one that has this need to express yourself, however it

271
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might be, it's the way to heal yourself, and you

272
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have to do it on your own. And I think

273
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a lot of people and parents love their children, and

274
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you know, most parents do it and like they want

275
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to help their kids by putting them in therapy or

276
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thinking that that's going to be the right thing to do,

277
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but lock them away and abandon them and put them

278
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somewhere where they're going to get right in the head.

279
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But in reality, dealing with that pain and dealing with

280
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the loneliness and finding a way through it, it allows

281
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you to find out who you are because you're alone

282
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with who you are, and you can either self destruct

283
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or you can start yet finding or realizing something, discovering

284
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something that makes you want to just you don't feel

285
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alone because you found something and it's not It doesn't

286
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:25,400
have to be a person. You don't have to fit

287
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into a click or ever be like anyone else. So

288
00:17:28,599 --> 00:17:32,240
I feel like I was more of an outcast. I

289
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:35,440
wore a Jason mass to prom, and I never had

290
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a boyfriend in high school. And I never saw myself

291
00:17:37,960 --> 00:17:42,160
as pretty or attractive or my looks is anything that

292
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made me any more or less or anything than anybody,

293
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you know what I mean.

294
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Speaker 2: The reason why is because, like you know.

295
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Speaker 3: I was told from the time I was a kid, oh,

296
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you're so pretty, you're so pretty, or is pretty?

297
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Speaker 2: You can't you shouldn't look in the mirror, don't look

298
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:03,319
in the mirror. And then it was almost like.

299
00:18:05,160 --> 00:18:08,880
Speaker 3: I almost felt like I rejected my appearance in a

300
00:18:08,920 --> 00:18:13,880
way because if you're told you're vain, or if you're

301
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told you're a narcissist by people that you thought loved you,

302
00:18:21,519 --> 00:18:25,759
and they make these harsh decisions upon you without actually

303
00:18:26,559 --> 00:18:30,920
knowing who you are inside. And I think that's why

304
00:18:31,000 --> 00:18:33,799
I escaped and I would go out to the shed

305
00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:36,079
and I would just listen to the extreme on music

306
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and I would go run like eight mile runs and

307
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just disappear. And it wasn't because I didn't let my

308
00:18:44,680 --> 00:18:47,839
families just they didn't. I felt like more like they

309
00:18:47,880 --> 00:18:52,319
always treated me like I was the one that was different.

310
00:18:53,039 --> 00:18:56,200
I was always the different kid that no one knew

311
00:18:56,240 --> 00:19:02,920
they were either intimidated by or they they you know,

312
00:19:03,200 --> 00:19:08,240
I just I don't care about making friends like that.

313
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Speaker 1: Let me say something real quick.

314
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Speaker 2: Yeah sorry, no no no, no, no.

315
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Speaker 1: No, and please no no no.

316
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Speaker 2: It's just kind of a development of how why I've

317
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:17,160
probably maybe got in the industry.

318
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Speaker 1: No, no, no. I think it's great, and I think

319
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:22,599
I think there's so many young kids who are in

320
00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:26,680
that situation where maybe they feel like they don't fit

321
00:19:26,759 --> 00:19:29,559
into their own families, you know. And what we have

322
00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:32,000
to understand as adults now and we look at it

323
00:19:32,079 --> 00:19:35,799
is it's not that maybe we were weird, it's that

324
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we were and and I think there's been too much

325
00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:40,680
of this with a lot of the younger generations being

326
00:19:40,720 --> 00:19:44,720
told this. But when you really don't fit in, I

327
00:19:44,720 --> 00:19:47,400
think you're special. You know, you just have to find

328
00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:48,920
what your path is to.

329
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Speaker 3: Now.

330
00:19:49,240 --> 00:19:51,759
Speaker 1: There are some just straight weirdos out there, right, like

331
00:19:51,799 --> 00:19:53,000
the weird kid in the family.

332
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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, of course there's a weird ones like Road Hill,

333
00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,799
Off the Road here and stuff like that.

334
00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:01,960
Speaker 2: But I was more of the kid that.

335
00:20:03,839 --> 00:20:08,559
Speaker 3: I heard like grunge music, and I well, I heard

336
00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:13,000
like when Kurticle Paint, Kurt Cole Pain and Nirvana and

337
00:20:13,079 --> 00:20:16,160
the MTV Unplugged and when he's saying like where'd you

338
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,680
sleep last night? And the last verse when you just

339
00:20:18,720 --> 00:20:22,599
scream and until his voice just fries out. Like that

340
00:20:22,680 --> 00:20:25,279
kind of stuff touched my soul in a way where

341
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:31,599
I saw truth. And I went to these like rock

342
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:34,680
camps or summer camps where every kid wanted to be

343
00:20:34,799 --> 00:20:38,039
the best guitar player and shred and do all this stuff.

344
00:20:38,359 --> 00:20:41,160
And I was sitting there in the lawn and I

345
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:46,160
could play guitar, but I wasn't showing off. I actually

346
00:20:46,440 --> 00:20:50,599
liked my classical guitar way better, and lately I really

347
00:20:50,640 --> 00:20:56,799
loved like bands like Leonard Cohen. And you know, I

348
00:20:57,279 --> 00:21:01,000
listened to a lot of good music now, but you know,

349
00:21:01,279 --> 00:21:03,920
when in that age, like when I was maybe fourteen

350
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:07,960
fifteen sixteen, I listened, I found grunge. And when I

351
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:10,680
found the nineties grunge, I think it really got me

352
00:21:11,480 --> 00:21:17,200
through my teenage years, just because teenage inks like teenage

353
00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:19,359
having inkst and if you can find a way to

354
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:24,480
take it out in a way where you feel understood

355
00:21:25,519 --> 00:21:28,640
by what you hear and you don't feel alone in it.

356
00:21:28,759 --> 00:21:32,119
And that's why I really respect art music and expression

357
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:39,960
when they're being very vulnerable to either write or express

358
00:21:40,000 --> 00:21:43,319
themselves in a way where it touches the souls of

359
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:49,200
people and it it I see value and meaning in

360
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:57,319
that more than like, you know, just getting the job

361
00:21:58,039 --> 00:22:02,000
and doing it to make money so that I can

362
00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:05,480
buy and have a picket fence and a house and whatever.

363
00:22:05,960 --> 00:22:08,400
And you know, like that's why recently I've really gotten

364
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:11,839
to Childs Mkowski over this past summer and he actually

365
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:15,079
saved my life really with he has a palm the

366
00:22:15,759 --> 00:22:21,400
Blue Bird, and it's just basically about how every person,

367
00:22:21,519 --> 00:22:25,440
and not everyone, but we all have our child, our

368
00:22:25,480 --> 00:22:29,960
inner soul and who we are, and that is part

369
00:22:29,960 --> 00:22:33,839
of us. And that is like our little bluebird if

370
00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:36,880
we don't feed it, if we say no, you can't talk.

371
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,480
You're not supposed to think that way. This is what

372
00:22:39,519 --> 00:22:43,000
everyone needs you to think. This is what society says

373
00:22:43,079 --> 00:22:46,000
is right and wrong. You can't have your own sense

374
00:22:46,039 --> 00:22:48,559
of right and wrong. You have to put you in

375
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:51,400
a cage and you have to be quiet, and we're

376
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:54,440
going to drown you. And now we're hurting too because

377
00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:56,039
we can't talk to you. So we're going to just

378
00:22:56,119 --> 00:23:00,559
keep hurting you. And then when I listen listen to that,

379
00:23:00,799 --> 00:23:03,480
I really felt touched because in a way I felt

380
00:23:03,519 --> 00:23:09,400
like it's like when I felt like since I started

381
00:23:09,400 --> 00:23:12,720
listening to that kind of stuff, I started to respect

382
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:17,599
myself more who I am on the inside and who

383
00:23:17,640 --> 00:23:23,200
I was and not what other people think and who

384
00:23:23,240 --> 00:23:23,559
I am.

385
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:28,079
Speaker 1: First off, have you ever read excuse me, Heavier than Heaven,

386
00:23:28,319 --> 00:23:33,160
the Charles Cross book, the Cobaine documentary or biography. No

387
00:23:33,319 --> 00:23:35,720
I haven't. I got to write it down. Only book

388
00:23:35,759 --> 00:23:38,880
I've ever read twice, Heavier than Heaven. It's very like

389
00:23:39,279 --> 00:23:42,200
in depth, they taught I'm a huge Nirvanica and Nirvana

390
00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:42,759
is my band.

391
00:23:42,839 --> 00:23:44,279
Speaker 2: Oh I love Nirvana.

392
00:23:44,640 --> 00:23:47,200
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, so that one is great, you.

393
00:23:47,160 --> 00:23:51,400
Speaker 2: Know, el save Babes and toiling. I mean, and I actually.

394
00:23:51,039 --> 00:23:54,559
Speaker 3: Do like Courtney Love because I start out, like, you know,

395
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:57,279
a lot of people hate her because she killed Kurt.

396
00:23:57,319 --> 00:24:00,799
And this about when I was fourteen fifteen, kind of

397
00:24:00,839 --> 00:24:04,480
between fourteen sixteen. She still had Instagram and she still

398
00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:07,359
had things, and I would post covers of her songs,

399
00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:10,799
and I postcovers in Nirvana songs. And one day I

400
00:24:10,839 --> 00:24:12,839
was out on a run, like in the middle of nowhere,

401
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:14,759
just run him, and all of a sudden, I get

402
00:24:14,759 --> 00:24:19,240
a notification on my like little like iPod iPhone type thing,

403
00:24:19,839 --> 00:24:22,480
and it says Courtney Love. Like like your post, Courtney

404
00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:28,000
Courtney Loves start following you. And then she commented on

405
00:24:28,039 --> 00:24:29,480
the posts as saying of.

406
00:24:31,039 --> 00:24:32,240
Speaker 2: Nirvana songs.

407
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:34,519
Speaker 3: So then I put them back up on my Instagram

408
00:24:34,599 --> 00:24:39,039
that I still have because even though her Instagram she

409
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:46,920
deleted it, probably because she wanted to escape. That's just

410
00:24:47,319 --> 00:24:53,599
you know, it just kept exploding into nobody knows who

411
00:24:53,599 --> 00:24:56,880
he was, but she does, and everybody all they know

412
00:24:57,079 --> 00:25:02,400
is what they hear and could make conspiracious about and

413
00:25:03,079 --> 00:25:07,119
whether whatever happened, no one could be right or wrong.

414
00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:10,519
We don't know what happened to Jim Morrison. We don't know,

415
00:25:10,759 --> 00:25:15,319
but you know it happened, and in the end, it's

416
00:25:15,440 --> 00:25:22,640
just kind of like I just really respected that a

417
00:25:22,680 --> 00:25:28,880
lot that here his wife, you know, would comment and

418
00:25:28,960 --> 00:25:32,039
follow me and say love.

419
00:25:31,839 --> 00:25:33,039
Speaker 1: It, that's awesome.

420
00:25:33,400 --> 00:25:37,480
Speaker 3: I did the cover of rape Me on my and

421
00:25:37,599 --> 00:25:39,960
I played guitar, so I was singing play guitar, and

422
00:25:40,039 --> 00:25:43,720
I was probably fifteen sixteen. I didn't know that I

423
00:25:43,799 --> 00:25:48,200
knew exactly what this song to the extent that I

424
00:25:48,359 --> 00:25:53,319
understand it now. But when I watched the video and

425
00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:57,559
when I hear what I did, I had expression. I

426
00:25:57,640 --> 00:26:04,400
express pain and feeling and compassion through through singing that,

427
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,559
and I feel like, I mean, I'm not you know,

428
00:26:08,079 --> 00:26:10,200
I mean I liked I'm right, Oh my law, my

429
00:26:10,200 --> 00:26:12,480
own music now. But covers is a great way to

430
00:26:12,519 --> 00:26:17,000
start and if you can really connect with it and

431
00:26:17,039 --> 00:26:19,000
not just do it.

432
00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:20,799
Speaker 2: To sound pretty or like.

433
00:26:20,839 --> 00:26:22,920
Speaker 3: Because I went to these rock camps, like I said,

434
00:26:22,920 --> 00:26:26,119
and there were too many kids that, oh, I'm going

435
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:29,400
to the Berkeley School of Music and I'm an opera singer,

436
00:26:29,519 --> 00:26:33,160
and the girl told me, she's like, your vocal cords

437
00:26:33,200 --> 00:26:35,480
are like this when you do that. She's like, you're

438
00:26:35,480 --> 00:26:39,200
wrecking your vocal chords. And I can talk just fine,

439
00:26:39,799 --> 00:26:45,799
and I have a good throat come in and I

440
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:49,119
work on it, and I never heard my voice doing

441
00:26:49,160 --> 00:26:52,160
it because I told my train myself, like, there's this

442
00:26:52,240 --> 00:26:56,039
bad Buck Cherry singer. He has this kind of like

443
00:26:56,119 --> 00:27:00,960
kind of crackly grally type kind of vocalist. But I

444
00:27:01,000 --> 00:27:04,359
would say, scream up, and it's not screamed like Maria

445
00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:07,039
Brinking in this moment, like I like, it's like a

446
00:27:08,079 --> 00:27:10,720
you know, like a like you know, it's taking it

447
00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:12,240
from down here and it's.

448
00:27:12,119 --> 00:27:15,160
Speaker 2: Like w you know, and it's coming out that way.

449
00:27:15,319 --> 00:27:18,880
Speaker 3: You know, it's not going like a like doing something

450
00:27:18,920 --> 00:27:22,079
that it's like wha, you know, like like you learn

451
00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:22,920
to like make a f.

452
00:27:23,200 --> 00:27:26,240
Speaker 1: From your diaphragm throat right.

453
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:29,880
Speaker 3: And it it takes time, And I guess I respect that.

454
00:27:29,920 --> 00:27:33,160
Buck Cherry even said he taught himself how to do it.

455
00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:36,119
He taught himself how to sing. And then Maria Bring

456
00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:40,759
taught herself out of sing like that, and and so

457
00:27:41,000 --> 00:27:43,400
did like Courtney Love had that kind of yell voice

458
00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:45,880
and and I really lately have been into the l

459
00:27:45,960 --> 00:27:49,079
seven I always like bathe in Toyland and like, you know,

460
00:27:49,319 --> 00:27:53,039
like seven year bitch, like like like I'm and I'm

461
00:27:53,079 --> 00:27:55,960
not a feminist, but here's the thing is I like,

462
00:27:56,799 --> 00:28:02,160
I like to hear expression in me. Like actually today

463
00:28:02,279 --> 00:28:04,920
I heard It's all over Now, Baby Blue, but the

464
00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:06,240
animals sing it.

465
00:28:07,319 --> 00:28:08,359
Speaker 2: I thought it was a Bob.

466
00:28:08,240 --> 00:28:11,240
Speaker 3: Dylan song, and then I heard Mary and Faithful sing

467
00:28:11,359 --> 00:28:13,920
It's all over Now, Baby Boom. But I heard the

468
00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:17,720
animals sing it today and I just felt I felt

469
00:28:17,759 --> 00:28:19,920
the feeling in it, you know what I mean? Sure,

470
00:28:20,000 --> 00:28:23,519
you really feel it. And that's why I think that

471
00:28:23,599 --> 00:28:26,240
means so Morston. Music is when you can really feel

472
00:28:26,279 --> 00:28:29,039
something from listen to it, and it doesn't always have

473
00:28:29,200 --> 00:28:30,920
to just sound pretty or perfect.

474
00:28:31,200 --> 00:28:33,079
Speaker 1: Sure, I agree. And a lot of grunge was that

475
00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:36,279
like I prefer in you to Row to never Mind.

476
00:28:36,680 --> 00:28:40,200
It's a little deeper, grungier, scratchier, you know.

477
00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:44,400
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Like I love to sing like Scentless Apprentice Tour,

478
00:28:44,440 --> 00:28:46,519
It's milk it Mike.

479
00:28:46,759 --> 00:28:51,160
Speaker 1: My favorite Nirvana song is such one that people are like,

480
00:28:51,279 --> 00:28:53,359
why would you like that? Because it's all noise at

481
00:28:53,359 --> 00:28:55,000
the beginning. Is radio friendly?

482
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:56,559
Speaker 2: Is it wet Vagina?

483
00:28:56,880 --> 00:29:00,240
Speaker 1: No, it's radio friendly, unit shifter from.

484
00:29:02,279 --> 00:29:06,240
Speaker 2: I mean, I like sell some Prentice like, oh, Bas's

485
00:29:06,359 --> 00:29:11,119
not like but you know what I mean, yeah, no.

486
00:29:16,440 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 1: Sex less.

487
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:21,359
Speaker 2: And then and then at the time when he's like,

488
00:29:21,519 --> 00:29:26,200
oh he didn't care, but how he sounded express his

489
00:29:26,319 --> 00:29:28,119
paint and you know, you're.

490
00:29:28,039 --> 00:29:33,160
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, a great song to come out years later.

491
00:29:33,480 --> 00:29:36,559
I mean I was expecting like junk and garbage kind

492
00:29:36,599 --> 00:29:38,799
of because I was, I was in it. I'm a

493
00:29:38,839 --> 00:29:42,000
little older than you, but he's so yeah that song

494
00:29:42,160 --> 00:29:44,359
is it was worth the wait, truthfully, you.

495
00:29:44,279 --> 00:29:46,960
Speaker 3: Know it was, yeah, And I'm glad I found them

496
00:29:46,960 --> 00:29:48,839
at my young age because I was just like this

497
00:29:48,920 --> 00:29:51,039
kid that didn't I didn't have a click, I didn't

498
00:29:51,039 --> 00:29:51,519
have friends.

499
00:29:51,599 --> 00:29:54,480
Speaker 2: I rode the bus over an hour home every night

500
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:56,759
during the winter.

501
00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:58,640
Speaker 3: Time, and it was cold and it was dark when

502
00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:00,440
you got home, and my parents came at my house

503
00:30:00,480 --> 00:30:02,680
at fifty eight degrees because of the old farmhouse.

504
00:30:03,519 --> 00:30:06,480
Speaker 2: So I would just get home, walk the dogs, slip

505
00:30:06,480 --> 00:30:07,440
on ice or be.

506
00:30:07,480 --> 00:30:10,039
Speaker 3: Out in the cold, and then get inside being the cold,

507
00:30:10,160 --> 00:30:14,920
and then just like sit there waiting for somebody to

508
00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:17,559
come home that you could talk to, you know, like

509
00:30:17,640 --> 00:30:20,880
your family. Like my sister were kind of avoided. She

510
00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:24,079
went to basketball, practiced, and I was in sports, but

511
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:30,200
not during the winter. Tried basketball, but I guess I

512
00:30:30,359 --> 00:30:34,880
was not like that kind of team player because I

513
00:30:34,920 --> 00:30:38,599
didn't like seeing like all the favoritism. So that's why

514
00:30:38,680 --> 00:30:43,200
I joined mainly. And I was a state champion across

515
00:30:43,279 --> 00:30:48,240
country at like fifteen, sixteen years old, and I wasn't

516
00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:52,599
even trying to win. I just went so hard at it,

517
00:30:52,640 --> 00:30:57,440
almost like revenge because the people that were on the

518
00:30:57,519 --> 00:31:02,400
team were the ones that the coach was favoring because

519
00:31:02,400 --> 00:31:05,720
that was his granddaughter and this and that, and.

520
00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:06,720
Speaker 2: I respect everybody.

521
00:31:06,759 --> 00:31:09,480
Speaker 3: I respected her, I liked her, but I also had

522
00:31:09,480 --> 00:31:13,119
this feeling that they put me on the bench and

523
00:31:13,160 --> 00:31:17,279
they never knew what I was capable of. So I

524
00:31:17,440 --> 00:31:20,079
was going to work all summer and I listened to

525
00:31:20,160 --> 00:31:23,559
music and that helped me dry myself. On these eight

526
00:31:23,599 --> 00:31:25,640
mile runs, I would run in the heat. I run

527
00:31:25,680 --> 00:31:28,640
in the nineteen degree snow. I ran in all the weather.

528
00:31:28,759 --> 00:31:31,160
Because my school was so small, we didn't have like

529
00:31:31,200 --> 00:31:35,000
a private gym, we didn't have like an indoor gym.

530
00:31:35,079 --> 00:31:39,160
We put ourselves out there in the elements, and then

531
00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:41,359
you learned how to deal with it, you know.

532
00:31:41,319 --> 00:31:43,480
Speaker 2: What I mean. So you weren't scared of a little

533
00:31:43,519 --> 00:31:44,680
snow and this and that.

534
00:31:45,319 --> 00:31:46,799
Speaker 3: So that's kind of I feel like how I grew up,

535
00:31:46,839 --> 00:31:49,599
and I was proud of that, even though at the time.

536
00:31:50,880 --> 00:31:52,319
Speaker 2: We all felt kind of like.

537
00:31:53,759 --> 00:31:57,559
Speaker 3: These private schools and these kids go to nice schools

538
00:31:57,640 --> 00:32:00,359
and they have nice gyms, and they have cheer leader

539
00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:04,839
clubs and dance clubs and music clubs. And I was

540
00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:08,920
taking guitar lessons from my band teacher, but first I

541
00:32:08,960 --> 00:32:12,359
was teaching myself. And I started playing when I was eight,

542
00:32:12,599 --> 00:32:18,079
so I had, you know, I played from a young age.

543
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:21,920
Speaker 2: It was always something out talking through, you know.

544
00:32:22,359 --> 00:32:23,880
Speaker 1: Not to change the focus.

545
00:32:23,920 --> 00:32:27,079
Speaker 2: But you said something that really not adult.

546
00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:29,799
Speaker 1: Not at all. But you're a fascinating person. You're an

547
00:32:29,799 --> 00:32:31,920
interesting person, kind of gets to the core. So let

548
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:34,480
me ask I get that same thing too. I don't

549
00:32:34,480 --> 00:32:37,200
call it revenge. I call it spite where you go

550
00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:41,960
that guy's PA and not redemption, but redemption's winning at

551
00:32:42,000 --> 00:32:43,519
the end, but you're building it.

552
00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:48,680
Speaker 2: On like I'm gonna, I'm gonna it gives you something

553
00:32:48,759 --> 00:32:50,519
to go out and do.

554
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 3: So, I think the people that didn't treat me with

555
00:32:56,799 --> 00:33:01,440
respect to me, actually I didn't need to respect. It's

556
00:33:01,519 --> 00:33:05,759
about how who you are to yourself and your bluebird.

557
00:33:06,279 --> 00:33:08,720
I'm going to respect my blue bird if.

558
00:33:08,680 --> 00:33:15,200
Speaker 2: I can believe in myself enough to to not not

559
00:33:15,319 --> 00:33:19,279
outrun everyone or beat anyone, or do it to win,

560
00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:24,400
but to do it to do it for myself, to

561
00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:28,039
help myself know what I'm capable of, and that I'm

562
00:33:28,640 --> 00:33:33,319
I am good enough and not good enough, but like

563
00:33:34,319 --> 00:33:37,359
I can do something on my own and I don't

564
00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:38,000
need them.

565
00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:41,119
Speaker 1: So let me ask, do you take that mindset into

566
00:33:41,160 --> 00:33:45,440
your current career where you go I want to shoot

567
00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:47,079
this type of scene. I'm going to push for it.

568
00:33:47,079 --> 00:33:49,000
I'm going to work for it because I see a

569
00:33:49,039 --> 00:33:51,519
lot of a lot of you female performers on Twitter

570
00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:54,319
are so I would expect it, and this is my

571
00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:56,960
rude misogyny from the outside. I would expect it to

572
00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:00,000
be cat fights all the time, girls going at each other.

573
00:34:00,519 --> 00:34:03,519
I see all that, but it seems it doesn't seem

574
00:34:03,559 --> 00:34:05,359
like that. You'll see that once in a while, but

575
00:34:05,400 --> 00:34:09,559
it's so supportive. It seems like, well, the way I.

576
00:34:09,519 --> 00:34:11,960
Speaker 3: Look at it is the girls that are in the

577
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:18,679
industry that do shoot the scene because you know modern

578
00:34:18,840 --> 00:34:23,440
day the you know, the adult film industry, like these

579
00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:28,400
companies that have been around for ages, their rates don't

580
00:34:28,559 --> 00:34:32,880
raise with inflation. So the girls that are really basically

581
00:34:33,000 --> 00:34:38,239
exploiting the girls that have worked in that business where

582
00:34:38,280 --> 00:34:42,360
we put ourselves out there, we get one check, we

583
00:34:42,400 --> 00:34:45,119
pay our taxes, and that's out there forever.

584
00:34:46,159 --> 00:34:48,760
Speaker 2: But I respect it.

585
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:51,199
Speaker 3: I respect the work I did in the scene I did,

586
00:34:51,239 --> 00:34:54,079
and that I put myself there, and I put myself

587
00:34:55,320 --> 00:35:00,559
in situations where I I became a stronger person and

588
00:35:00,639 --> 00:35:04,159
I respect people, and I know how to respect people,

589
00:35:05,320 --> 00:35:09,159
and I know how to work hard, and I didn't

590
00:35:09,159 --> 00:35:13,920
take advantage of somebody's somebody by selling them some fake

591
00:35:14,599 --> 00:35:18,440
idea on like the OF I actually don't really even

592
00:35:18,559 --> 00:35:21,920
use my OF anymore. I barely ever log in because

593
00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:28,239
it's like, to me, it feels like I can't talk

594
00:35:28,840 --> 00:35:32,159
to everybody on an individual basis myself. And I'm not

595
00:35:32,199 --> 00:35:36,159
going to hire a third party to message people for me.

596
00:35:36,360 --> 00:35:40,320
And I'm not going to make some AI bought to

597
00:35:40,360 --> 00:35:44,239
pretend they're me to talk to people. I'd rather go

598
00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:50,360
to the old school conventions, the exoticas and the avns

599
00:35:48,679 --> 00:35:55,559
and just talk to people and be a person with people,

600
00:35:55,639 --> 00:35:59,320
because that's how we are in the Midwest, like treated

601
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:03,719
someone like a person, because especially, you know, if you've

602
00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:07,360
worked in fast food, you've done I think there's a

603
00:36:07,440 --> 00:36:11,960
lot of times when you're just you don't feel you know,

604
00:36:12,599 --> 00:36:18,280
like you don't feel good about yourself, you don't have

605
00:36:18,360 --> 00:36:22,400
respect for yourself. And it's so it's just to me,

606
00:36:22,519 --> 00:36:28,320
it's just more like I'm not gonna to try to

607
00:36:29,519 --> 00:36:35,760
groom men basically to make some money. I would rather

608
00:36:37,199 --> 00:36:43,519
build connections with people that are real and meaningful and

609
00:36:41,360 --> 00:36:45,719
uh and I find my way through that because I'm

610
00:36:45,760 --> 00:36:51,840
breaching out and I respected industry and I never regret

611
00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:56,360
anything because I left a place where I felt.

612
00:36:56,079 --> 00:37:01,079
Speaker 2: I wasn't able to take the risks that I wanted.

613
00:37:01,079 --> 00:37:04,599
Speaker 3: And that honestly was college, right, all kind of trapped

614
00:37:04,679 --> 00:37:08,840
in college. And like nowadays, you know, in politics, all

615
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:14,840
these younger kids, these far right, you know, mega type boys,

616
00:37:14,880 --> 00:37:17,360
they're all saying, oh, college is a waste time, blah

617
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:21,119
blah blah. You know, but like I already felt that

618
00:37:21,159 --> 00:37:23,280
way when I dropped out twenty twenty.

619
00:37:23,360 --> 00:37:26,880
Speaker 1: You know, I felt that way when my film degree

620
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:29,079
was entirely useless after something.

621
00:37:29,159 --> 00:37:33,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, so it's because I had a sense of humor.

622
00:37:34,039 --> 00:37:42,039
Speaker 3: So my professors choked with me, but they ridiculed me

623
00:37:42,519 --> 00:37:45,360
in front of the class, and I wasn't hurt, but.

624
00:37:46,920 --> 00:37:51,440
Speaker 2: It was almost like they are.

625
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,960
Speaker 3: It was like an egging, like like throwing eggs at

626
00:37:56,000 --> 00:38:07,880
somebody to not ever help help them become kind, believe

627
00:38:07,920 --> 00:38:12,039
in themselves, basically try to just crush people's dreams. So

628
00:38:12,159 --> 00:38:14,639
in the in the adult industry, it's not.

629
00:38:14,639 --> 00:38:17,400
Speaker 1: Like that, really, it's it's more positive.

630
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:22,480
Speaker 3: Not when I joined it was And honestly, the agent

631
00:38:22,599 --> 00:38:25,360
I had was a very old agent and he's returned now,

632
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:32,719
I believe, so he uh, you know, he was there

633
00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:35,400
when I flew in la at like eleven thirty pm

634
00:38:35,440 --> 00:38:37,920
at night. He was there pick me up and drive

635
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:40,679
me to the modelhouse up in the valley, so I

636
00:38:40,679 --> 00:38:42,320
didn't have to pay for a one hundred dollars where

637
00:38:42,400 --> 00:38:44,239
because I have that kind of like.

638
00:38:45,519 --> 00:38:48,119
Speaker 2: He made sure we were safe.

639
00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:51,559
Speaker 3: So that's why when I get mad with people, are

640
00:38:51,599 --> 00:38:54,960
always just in the adult industry, and oh but all

641
00:38:55,000 --> 00:39:00,719
these of models can be so much better than the

642
00:39:00,719 --> 00:39:02,320
the real porn stars.

643
00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:05,039
Speaker 1: Right, let me ask you, so I won't ask you

644
00:39:05,079 --> 00:39:08,079
to name them at all, But have you been on

645
00:39:08,159 --> 00:39:11,239
a bad set and a good set, and what separates

646
00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:13,440
the difference between the two. Like you speak a lot

647
00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:15,679
about respect and this and that, have you ever had

648
00:39:15,679 --> 00:39:19,559
a bad experience on set where maybe they either didn't

649
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:24,599
trust your word on how you do something or yeah, okay,

650
00:39:24,679 --> 00:39:26,280
all right, tell me about that. But again, I'm not

651
00:39:26,360 --> 00:39:29,360
asking you to call out anyone specifically, like that's not

652
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:29,880
my intent.

653
00:39:30,119 --> 00:39:34,719
Speaker 3: I never would because in the end, I respect everybody,

654
00:39:34,920 --> 00:39:40,000
and everybody has challenges, and everybody is in a place

655
00:39:41,400 --> 00:39:44,239
in the adult industry. Of course, to be in that

656
00:39:44,360 --> 00:39:45,199
industry and to.

657
00:39:45,199 --> 00:39:48,400
Speaker 2: Face it the.

658
00:39:49,920 --> 00:39:54,280
Speaker 3: Discussed in some ways by your own family.

659
00:39:55,519 --> 00:40:00,320
Speaker 2: You know, it's how could I not?

660
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:03,199
Speaker 3: But I guess the instance I had been on that

661
00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:10,519
set was when I was doing my best and I

662
00:40:10,679 --> 00:40:17,360
was in pain, and I just they always told me

663
00:40:17,400 --> 00:40:20,880
I could call cut, So I called cut, and I

664
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:22,400
went to the bathroom to cry.

665
00:40:24,639 --> 00:40:31,920
Speaker 2: And then I guess later after the scene, my agent

666
00:40:32,039 --> 00:40:36,000
had told the director that I respected, and this wasn't

667
00:40:36,039 --> 00:40:38,920
the first agent, this wasn't he told him that I

668
00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:42,960
was in the bathroom doing drugs, and then so here's

669
00:40:43,000 --> 00:40:45,320
people I respect that I went in the bathroom to

670
00:40:45,320 --> 00:40:50,039
cry because I needed a break because it's intense. It's

671
00:40:50,079 --> 00:40:50,840
intense on.

672
00:40:50,760 --> 00:40:54,480
Speaker 3: Your body day after day to work in that industry,

673
00:40:55,519 --> 00:41:01,159
to be under the pressure where you're on a big

674
00:41:01,199 --> 00:41:05,559
set and it's an all day job, like you're there

675
00:41:05,599 --> 00:41:09,440
from the early early morning, like in a different city

676
00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:13,159
you're not used to as I'm from Wisconsin. I'm up

677
00:41:13,199 --> 00:41:16,440
in La I'm taking ubers up into the mountains and

678
00:41:17,079 --> 00:41:21,840
I'm doing my best and I'm doing the outfittings and

679
00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:24,199
I know that everything's on the line. I never want

680
00:41:24,199 --> 00:41:30,960
to let my agent down or anybody down. And that's

681
00:41:31,000 --> 00:41:33,519
why it was sad to me, because I was never

682
00:41:33,679 --> 00:41:38,880
on doing anything. I had to cry. I'm an emotional

683
00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:45,039
person and that's also why I feel like that's why

684
00:41:45,079 --> 00:41:48,079
I like to write, and I like to listen to

685
00:41:48,159 --> 00:41:51,880
music that affects me, and I like to sing and

686
00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:58,280
play music because I expressed myself. So I'll cry or

687
00:41:58,679 --> 00:42:02,800
I might pay have a payanic a moment of panic,

688
00:42:03,039 --> 00:42:06,880
and and part of those moments of panic that came

689
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:10,639
from situations where you didn't actually know.

690
00:42:12,280 --> 00:42:13,159
Speaker 2: That it was wrong.

691
00:42:13,440 --> 00:42:16,400
Speaker 3: You just said yes, because you didn't want to let

692
00:42:16,440 --> 00:42:20,360
somebody down, you know what I mean. So you didn't

693
00:42:20,360 --> 00:42:26,880
want to just be abandoned. You wanted to make the

694
00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:32,760
people that supported you. You wanted to make them proud. Sure,

695
00:42:32,920 --> 00:42:36,199
and I will not a quitter, and you know, being

696
00:42:36,199 --> 00:42:39,719
an athlete might a person from the Midwest, like you know,

697
00:42:39,840 --> 00:42:43,119
I worked on my grandpa's farm. Some we build hey,

698
00:42:43,280 --> 00:42:46,480
Like you know, just quit when you're tired or if

699
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:47,480
you're uncomfortable.

700
00:42:48,559 --> 00:42:51,079
Speaker 2: You can't say you got to do the work, so

701
00:42:51,159 --> 00:42:51,719
it's done.

702
00:42:51,920 --> 00:42:55,400
Speaker 3: And like I think that would be my only advice

703
00:42:55,480 --> 00:43:01,480
of anyone going into the industry is that there's no

704
00:43:01,599 --> 00:43:08,280
point in policing people in that way because now, I mean,

705
00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:10,519
like the last scenes I've shot and gone out in

706
00:43:10,599 --> 00:43:14,199
vased a shot, I just have fun because I have

707
00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:15,480
fun with the directors.

708
00:43:15,840 --> 00:43:19,320
Speaker 2: I have fun all day on set. We play music, and.

709
00:43:20,719 --> 00:43:23,639
Speaker 3: I don't look at it as something that if I

710
00:43:23,719 --> 00:43:29,559
don't do it right, they're gonna, you know, I'm gonna

711
00:43:29,599 --> 00:43:32,800
disappoint them. So when I didn't think of it like

712
00:43:32,840 --> 00:43:34,960
that anymore, like oh, I got to make them happy.

713
00:43:35,360 --> 00:43:39,320
I was doing it because I wanted to, and it

714
00:43:39,360 --> 00:43:41,840
wasn't much about like the sex part of the industry.

715
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:44,559
It's more about like being on set with people that

716
00:43:45,880 --> 00:43:47,760
understand you and.

717
00:43:49,239 --> 00:43:51,000
Speaker 2: Get it. You do get to express.

718
00:43:50,639 --> 00:43:54,719
Speaker 3: Yourself a lot acting wise, I mean, and they let

719
00:43:54,840 --> 00:43:57,760
you improvise a lot, so like even real you know,

720
00:43:57,920 --> 00:44:01,719
actors don't just get to improvise their whole script. So

721
00:44:02,400 --> 00:44:04,480
if I want to make it funny, I would make

722
00:44:04,519 --> 00:44:08,760
it funny. I say whatever I wanted, And sometimes it's

723
00:44:08,920 --> 00:44:14,719
very taboo and wrong and very nineteen seventies eighties movies

724
00:44:14,800 --> 00:44:17,760
where they don't make that kind of stuff anymore. But

725
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:21,360
in the adult film industry, we can still make that

726
00:44:21,440 --> 00:44:22,199
kind of stuff.

727
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:26,360
Speaker 2: And I actually that's why I'm more into like going forward.

728
00:44:26,400 --> 00:44:26,719
I want.

729
00:44:27,320 --> 00:44:31,960
Speaker 3: I'm more really figured that I actually really like enjoy

730
00:44:32,159 --> 00:44:38,119
making funny things and making not making fun of anybody

731
00:44:38,360 --> 00:44:40,360
I'm making fun of anything like that.

732
00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:42,719
Speaker 2: But like, for example, like I did.

733
00:44:42,559 --> 00:44:46,360
Speaker 3: An Amish scene and they chose me to be the

734
00:44:46,360 --> 00:44:48,599
homage person because I don't have tattoos than from the

735
00:44:48,639 --> 00:44:53,280
Midwest and I look pretty incent and it's then I guess,

736
00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:57,199
so I just didn't even know how to talk Amish,

737
00:44:57,480 --> 00:45:01,039
so I just would be like, like my sister was

738
00:45:01,039 --> 00:45:02,559
trying to take me off the farm. I would just

739
00:45:02,599 --> 00:45:06,360
be like, oh sis, sure, oh no, sister, like uh,

740
00:45:07,079 --> 00:45:08,800
like like I was there with like the guy who

741
00:45:08,880 --> 00:45:10,760
supposed to marry, but with like it was like a

742
00:45:10,800 --> 00:45:13,840
Mormon type thing where like no, no, it's like marriage.

743
00:45:14,760 --> 00:45:15,679
Speaker 2: We we can't.

744
00:45:15,840 --> 00:45:19,320
Speaker 3: We can't share a battel marriage, you know, like like

745
00:45:19,519 --> 00:45:21,480
like it's just it just put me in a position

746
00:45:21,519 --> 00:45:24,360
where I could say what I want and director didn't

747
00:45:24,360 --> 00:45:24,840
stop me.

748
00:45:25,360 --> 00:45:28,039
Speaker 2: They kept it rolling. And then at the end of

749
00:45:28,119 --> 00:45:29,239
the day we.

750
00:45:29,280 --> 00:45:33,519
Speaker 3: All are eating food or whatever, and it just felt

751
00:45:34,800 --> 00:45:37,719
there is a togetherness and I do miss that I

752
00:45:37,760 --> 00:45:42,199
don't have an agent currently. It's and that's the thing

753
00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:47,119
is is because lots of these agencies they're not even

754
00:45:47,199 --> 00:45:51,679
taking on new people. And like when your contract ends,

755
00:45:53,880 --> 00:45:57,679
it's difficult being not living in LA. And then but

756
00:45:57,800 --> 00:46:00,960
a lot of girls will live of like I'm living

757
00:46:00,960 --> 00:46:04,320
in Wisconsin and I'll buy my flight out to LA

758
00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:06,039
and I could be out there a whole month, you know,

759
00:46:06,920 --> 00:46:11,039
and it actually helps you tax wise, because that's a

760
00:46:11,119 --> 00:46:15,559
business expense, is having to buy and pay for things

761
00:46:15,599 --> 00:46:18,079
in your flights and all that. And then I can

762
00:46:18,119 --> 00:46:22,119
live where I feel safe and the people are friendly.

763
00:46:22,800 --> 00:46:26,239
And I love the food in Wisconsin, and I love

764
00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:29,800
I'm not a cheesecriped person, but I love culvers.

765
00:46:29,840 --> 00:46:30,719
Speaker 2: If you ever heard of.

766
00:46:30,679 --> 00:46:32,280
Speaker 1: Clivers, I've heard of culvers.

767
00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:35,000
Speaker 2: Yes, they got the best coals in the world. So

768
00:46:35,719 --> 00:46:39,599
enough the butter burgers call sat and quick shrip and

769
00:46:40,280 --> 00:46:42,400
quick trip. So I'm always be loyal in Wisconsin.

770
00:46:43,039 --> 00:46:46,119
Speaker 3: And lately I've been getting the egg roll and I'll

771
00:46:46,159 --> 00:46:48,559
get like a chicken sandwich. But they have a whole

772
00:46:48,559 --> 00:46:52,320
connoment bar where you lettuce tomato, onion everything where if

773
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:55,000
you go like Burger King or somewhere, it's like thirty

774
00:46:55,039 --> 00:46:55,800
cents of tomato.

775
00:46:56,280 --> 00:46:59,679
Speaker 2: So it's like Wisconsin won't rip you off, you know.

776
00:47:00,760 --> 00:47:03,519
Speaker 3: So it makes me feel loyal to your state, especially

777
00:47:03,519 --> 00:47:06,159
when you're like, there are a lot of vampire type

778
00:47:06,159 --> 00:47:09,840
people out west. But New York, on the other hand,

779
00:47:10,760 --> 00:47:14,559
I find New York more like a velvet underground lou reed,

780
00:47:14,800 --> 00:47:17,880
Like it's a wild world, wild side of the world,

781
00:47:17,920 --> 00:47:21,400
and I love being in the jungle, but it's also

782
00:47:21,599 --> 00:47:26,519
nice to leave. But it's a fun cool five days

783
00:47:26,559 --> 00:47:29,960
in New York is like a lifetime I had in

784
00:47:30,039 --> 00:47:34,159
even experienced anywhere else, like you know, but Also I

785
00:47:34,199 --> 00:47:37,480
look at it more like if I lived in New York,

786
00:47:37,559 --> 00:47:42,840
I probably at some point would feel I would miss

787
00:47:43,480 --> 00:47:47,159
the open roads of Wisconsin. And I live in like Madison,

788
00:47:47,239 --> 00:47:48,239
where I live, like in.

789
00:47:48,199 --> 00:47:52,000
Speaker 2: The most busiest area of Madison, like Street, but it's

790
00:47:52,039 --> 00:47:55,760
also a college campus, so there's just always something going

791
00:47:55,800 --> 00:47:59,119
on and it's very safe. We got the capital of

792
00:47:59,440 --> 00:48:02,920
a few blocks way, and then the university cops and

793
00:48:02,960 --> 00:48:05,880
then the Madison police, and I just feel safe here

794
00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:09,159
and then surrounded by lakes and running trails and I'm

795
00:48:09,159 --> 00:48:12,320
a runner, and the airport's fifteen minutes away, so I

796
00:48:12,360 --> 00:48:13,320
can fly anywhere.

797
00:48:15,679 --> 00:48:19,480
Speaker 1: Has anyone ever recognized you around your hometown? Though?

798
00:48:19,639 --> 00:48:24,280
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, here on State Street these college college kids. Surprisingly,

799
00:48:25,400 --> 00:48:28,159
I was at a bar here Mondays and the bartender

800
00:48:30,159 --> 00:48:36,079
are you are you scarlet? Or said hi? Can we order?

801
00:48:36,199 --> 00:48:37,880
Like I was going to order some shots or my

802
00:48:37,920 --> 00:48:40,440
friends And I'm not like a huge drinker. I'm not.

803
00:48:41,559 --> 00:48:45,039
I'm honestly not. But what I like to like go

804
00:48:45,079 --> 00:48:49,719
hang out with my friends and and just to have

805
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:52,960
a good time on's wall and like, are you scarlet?

806
00:48:53,719 --> 00:48:55,239
I know? Or you said? I know you you.

807
00:48:55,199 --> 00:48:58,679
Speaker 3: Are You're scarlet, You're scarlet here to and this was

808
00:48:58,719 --> 00:49:01,079
like my first year and I just got back to

809
00:49:01,159 --> 00:49:04,280
medicine and I didn't ever seem I don't.

810
00:49:04,639 --> 00:49:06,239
Speaker 2: I don't view myself.

811
00:49:07,320 --> 00:49:14,519
Speaker 3: Is anyway like uh, like I only view myself as

812
00:49:14,559 --> 00:49:19,000
someone that like I want to keep working hard to

813
00:49:20,159 --> 00:49:27,599
make myself proud of finding out who I am and

814
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:36,480
uh using my gifts and expressing myself the way I want.

815
00:49:37,039 --> 00:49:40,679
That'll that'll feel the best about myself, I think.

816
00:49:41,119 --> 00:49:43,480
Speaker 1: So let me ask you, actually, this is the last

817
00:49:43,559 --> 00:49:44,440
question I have for you.

818
00:49:44,519 --> 00:49:50,679
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I get super deep when I talk, and sometimes.

819
00:49:50,239 --> 00:49:54,480
Speaker 2: Like like, uh, I get lost and I tray off.

820
00:49:54,639 --> 00:49:58,599
Speaker 3: But that's also what sometimes like on some of these podcasts,

821
00:49:58,599 --> 00:50:01,239
people just like like listen to me talk.

822
00:50:01,320 --> 00:50:03,800
Speaker 1: I guess I love honestly.

823
00:50:03,559 --> 00:50:06,079
Speaker 3: I go in a different direction. But also like soda

824
00:50:06,159 --> 00:50:10,800
the President Trump, Sure yeah, And I'm not deflecting. I

825
00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:11,480
honestly am not.

826
00:50:11,840 --> 00:50:12,400
Speaker 1: I get it.

827
00:50:14,199 --> 00:50:16,719
Speaker 2: I just my brain works like that. And that's why

828
00:50:16,800 --> 00:50:18,320
they would always consider me of.

829
00:50:18,320 --> 00:50:23,519
Speaker 3: Being like like the oddball or the different one. And

830
00:50:23,519 --> 00:50:26,679
and but they said that to me since I was

831
00:50:26,719 --> 00:50:30,679
a child. So to me, it doesn't affect me, But

832
00:50:31,239 --> 00:50:33,480
it just affects me that one day on that set

833
00:50:33,519 --> 00:50:37,039
when I was crying in the bathroom and I just

834
00:50:37,159 --> 00:50:40,559
needed a hug and uh, I was in pain it

835
00:50:40,599 --> 00:50:42,400
but I knew I had to finish the scene to

836
00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:46,800
make everybody proud and do that and it was important

837
00:50:46,920 --> 00:50:51,559
and but you know, and then to be accused of

838
00:50:51,639 --> 00:50:52,559
that later.

839
00:50:52,320 --> 00:50:55,880
Speaker 1: And yeah, that's crazy, that's wrong, that's it's it's.

840
00:50:56,440 --> 00:50:59,719
Speaker 3: Times like I felt that that's the one memorable expected

841
00:51:00,000 --> 00:51:01,039
experience I hadn't set.

842
00:51:01,079 --> 00:51:02,360
Speaker 2: Actually, I could say anything.

843
00:51:02,800 --> 00:51:08,840
Speaker 3: The directors have always been amazing, and they're like the

844
00:51:08,920 --> 00:51:10,960
coolest people, and the.

845
00:51:11,360 --> 00:51:13,360
Speaker 2: Talent is great.

846
00:51:13,800 --> 00:51:18,719
Speaker 3: It's just and you know, my agents they wanted me

847
00:51:18,760 --> 00:51:21,360
to have a good career and they looked out for me.

848
00:51:22,199 --> 00:51:25,360
I think the scariest thing for some girls that start

849
00:51:25,400 --> 00:51:28,400
out is when you're in You go up on a

850
00:51:28,480 --> 00:51:31,880
mountain and this guy might own the site himself and

851
00:51:31,960 --> 00:51:35,000
he shows all the photos and you're alone with him

852
00:51:35,239 --> 00:51:40,079
for two days and he's telling you to do something and.

853
00:51:41,639 --> 00:51:42,719
Speaker 2: It's your job.

854
00:51:43,360 --> 00:51:45,119
Speaker 3: You're going to do it, and you're sent there and

855
00:51:45,119 --> 00:51:51,199
you're alone with them, and if you don't do it, do.

856
00:51:51,199 --> 00:51:52,039
Speaker 2: You have a chance?

857
00:51:53,159 --> 00:51:55,159
Speaker 1: And yeah, I mean, if you don't do it, you

858
00:51:55,320 --> 00:52:00,719
have just the regular lifetime, like the fact that you're

859
00:52:00,719 --> 00:52:03,360
with a dude you don't necessarily have access to a car.

860
00:52:03,519 --> 00:52:06,920
You have those natural fears, which is totally understandable, But

861
00:52:06,960 --> 00:52:09,800
the other side is professionally too, like you're scared if

862
00:52:09,840 --> 00:52:12,760
you don't speak up and say how you actually feel,

863
00:52:12,840 --> 00:52:15,960
or if you do do that, this guy might motherfuck

864
00:52:16,039 --> 00:52:18,760
you to Like other companies, you have done.

865
00:52:18,800 --> 00:52:23,360
Speaker 2: Things like that. And it's only just because.

866
00:52:25,079 --> 00:52:27,840
Speaker 3: There were insenses where I was worrying my health was

867
00:52:27,880 --> 00:52:33,400
at risk sure to continue a scene so I couldn't

868
00:52:33,440 --> 00:52:39,239
finish it, and instead of there's no understanding, it's just

869
00:52:40,440 --> 00:52:41,559
we're out this much money.

870
00:52:41,599 --> 00:52:46,559
Speaker 1: Now, sure, let me ask you this. Then, last question,

871
00:52:46,679 --> 00:52:50,519
where do we see your career going from here? Do

872
00:52:50,559 --> 00:52:53,760
you want to mostly just I said mostly That was

873
00:52:53,760 --> 00:52:56,519
a weird accent. Do you mostly want to just keep

874
00:52:56,519 --> 00:52:59,039
shooting mainstream stuff? Do you want to branch out into

875
00:52:59,119 --> 00:53:01,119
other stuff? You want to get your music published? Do

876
00:53:01,159 --> 00:53:02,400
you want to what do you want to do? Tell

877
00:53:02,440 --> 00:53:05,119
me what the next twenty five years of your life is.

878
00:53:05,639 --> 00:53:10,280
Speaker 3: Oh, well, I've definitely gotta finish my album because I've

879
00:53:10,280 --> 00:53:15,960
been writing since advocated and I because of the industry,

880
00:53:16,119 --> 00:53:21,360
and I'm a good practical singing person. I have built

881
00:53:21,440 --> 00:53:25,119
my music studio and i have my new logic pro

882
00:53:25,400 --> 00:53:27,760
and I've just been working on stuff today and I'm

883
00:53:27,800 --> 00:53:35,960
like starting to appreciate the person. I also the other

884
00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:40,559
parts to myself that I just put, you know, the

885
00:53:40,599 --> 00:53:42,800
little bluebirds that I put them in the little cage

886
00:53:42,840 --> 00:53:46,639
and said, no, you gotta you gotta just do this,

887
00:53:46,760 --> 00:53:48,440
and you got to do this and make money. And

888
00:53:49,079 --> 00:53:52,159
now I look at it like, you know, I've lost

889
00:53:52,199 --> 00:53:55,840
some friends, and uh, it makes me look at.

890
00:53:55,679 --> 00:53:56,119
Speaker 2: It like.

891
00:53:58,719 --> 00:54:02,320
Speaker 3: You have to not not all. You can't just make

892
00:54:02,800 --> 00:54:06,440
everyone in society proud. You have to you have to

893
00:54:06,519 --> 00:54:11,440
be who you are. And uh, that's the meaning is

894
00:54:11,519 --> 00:54:13,239
right in front of you, and it's with you, and

895
00:54:13,800 --> 00:54:19,119
it's inside of you, and it's and it's hard because

896
00:54:19,360 --> 00:54:22,000
most of the time I can't respect myself. And it's

897
00:54:22,039 --> 00:54:23,280
not because of anybody else.

898
00:54:24,000 --> 00:54:27,599
Speaker 2: It's my own obstacles.

899
00:54:28,079 --> 00:54:31,800
Speaker 3: And everybody faces that, you know, I think what other

900
00:54:31,840 --> 00:54:35,360
people can say anything, and it cannot hurt me.

901
00:54:35,320 --> 00:54:37,320
Speaker 2: As much as the way.

902
00:54:37,199 --> 00:54:41,360
Speaker 3: I allow myself to.

903
00:54:44,119 --> 00:54:45,840
Speaker 2: Not believe in myself.

904
00:54:48,679 --> 00:54:52,360
Speaker 3: And but when you have, when you give yourself a chance,

905
00:54:52,519 --> 00:54:56,559
it's just that's the hardest thing is that consistent saying

906
00:54:56,639 --> 00:55:01,440
that you're good enough and and you can do this,

907
00:55:01,880 --> 00:55:07,519
and you're worthy to do that, and this is part

908
00:55:07,519 --> 00:55:13,760
of who you are, so it doesn't matter what you

909
00:55:13,960 --> 00:55:19,119
work to deserve. It's part of you. And that's a gift.

910
00:55:20,280 --> 00:55:20,880
Speaker 1: I couldn't.

911
00:55:24,519 --> 00:55:28,119
Speaker 2: I just I talk from my heart sometimes, so.

912
00:55:30,000 --> 00:55:33,159
Speaker 3: It's hurt me too many times. But like it's just

913
00:55:33,199 --> 00:55:39,400
because a lot of people doing podcasts. Actually I feel

914
00:55:39,519 --> 00:55:43,840
very comfortable being very honest. And the reason why I

915
00:55:43,880 --> 00:55:51,840
think is because I don't I'm not targeting any anybody.

916
00:55:53,320 --> 00:55:55,199
A lot of people I know they like to make

917
00:55:55,239 --> 00:55:57,320
fun of people or they like to do this or that.

918
00:55:58,840 --> 00:56:02,039
I feel like I'm the meanest person in the world

919
00:56:02,079 --> 00:56:09,079
and myself and I respect anybody that uh can work

920
00:56:09,639 --> 00:56:11,679
just respect themselves.

921
00:56:11,760 --> 00:56:11,960
Speaker 2: You know.

922
00:56:12,760 --> 00:56:16,039
Speaker 1: I wish I could wave a magic wand and make

923
00:56:16,079 --> 00:56:17,280
you feel better, because you.

924
00:56:17,639 --> 00:56:20,360
Speaker 3: Don't know, I feel amazing. Actually, this is very sorry

925
00:56:20,480 --> 00:56:23,800
for me. I always people. It's interesting because every time,

926
00:56:23,880 --> 00:56:26,440
like if I sniffle or tear up a little bit,

927
00:56:27,000 --> 00:56:33,639
it's actually, uh, it's out of like a respect and

928
00:56:34,199 --> 00:56:37,159
appreciation and gratefulness.

929
00:56:37,920 --> 00:56:41,360
Speaker 1: Well again, I don't think you're the odd ball in

930
00:56:41,400 --> 00:56:43,920
your family I think maybe you're the special one. I

931
00:56:43,960 --> 00:56:47,360
think your career to this point, from what I've seen,

932
00:56:47,599 --> 00:56:51,320
has been filled with nothing but performance is hard and

933
00:56:51,880 --> 00:56:53,639
more industry work.

934
00:56:53,719 --> 00:56:59,159
Speaker 2: And and I'll do it, you know. I I set

935
00:56:59,199 --> 00:57:03,800
it up on my own and I show everyone respect

936
00:57:03,920 --> 00:57:07,440
that I work with, and I go if I shoot

937
00:57:07,440 --> 00:57:09,599
a scene, I go there or not.

938
00:57:09,880 --> 00:57:12,400
Speaker 3: I have fun and I do it to have fun.

939
00:57:13,159 --> 00:57:18,159
And you know, I do it because I see it

940
00:57:18,239 --> 00:57:18,599
now is.

941
00:57:20,239 --> 00:57:24,000
Speaker 2: I'm lucky to just have like a cool job. Like

942
00:57:24,079 --> 00:57:30,760
I respect the just the family feel of the industry

943
00:57:30,760 --> 00:57:34,119
because it is smaller like like I don't think I

944
00:57:34,119 --> 00:57:38,719
think of the industry is that actual performers that have

945
00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:46,119
sacrificed relationships and family and and whether it's college or

946
00:57:47,119 --> 00:57:50,199
a certain job that they might have wanted, or they're

947
00:57:51,000 --> 00:57:55,920
they're the bank they choose. Even those are the ones

948
00:57:55,960 --> 00:57:58,760
I respect versus some of these girls going out there

949
00:57:59,519 --> 00:58:03,480
that just started that are just trying to make the

950
00:58:03,599 --> 00:58:05,599
Bisiness Book of World records. You know.

951
00:58:05,960 --> 00:58:07,719
Speaker 1: You know what my favorite ones are are the new

952
00:58:07,760 --> 00:58:10,679
girls who get into the industry and immediately right off

953
00:58:10,679 --> 00:58:14,079
the bat go right to Finn Doom because it's like

954
00:58:14,239 --> 00:58:16,360
the one where they on.

955
00:58:16,320 --> 00:58:19,239
Speaker 2: The whatever podcast because they put me together with a

956
00:58:19,280 --> 00:58:22,719
lot of girls that I treat everyone respect. But I

957
00:58:22,760 --> 00:58:27,159
also had to. I had to, I had to. I

958
00:58:27,199 --> 00:58:27,840
got stern.

959
00:58:28,599 --> 00:58:31,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you know, I guess you know, my mom's

960
00:58:31,400 --> 00:58:34,199
an attorney and she's you know, she was a stamp

961
00:58:34,199 --> 00:58:36,239
where she's she's very smart.

962
00:58:36,400 --> 00:58:37,800
Speaker 2: That's partly why too, Like.

963
00:58:39,840 --> 00:58:42,039
Speaker 3: We get along now and we love each other, but

964
00:58:42,599 --> 00:58:45,000
it was hard on her when she found out and

965
00:58:45,119 --> 00:58:49,239
uh so. But also I see people in the industry.

966
00:58:49,280 --> 00:58:52,199
There's people I met through the industry that will always

967
00:58:52,239 --> 00:58:54,320
be there for me and they've saved my life.

968
00:58:54,800 --> 00:58:56,719
Speaker 1: Do you want to shout anyone out or no.

969
00:58:58,280 --> 00:59:02,519
Speaker 2: Things? And there's been a few really good people that's

970
00:59:02,559 --> 00:59:04,119
just give me a safe place to live.

971
00:59:04,559 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 1: Yes, that's the most important thing. The most important thing

972
00:59:07,559 --> 00:59:10,559
is being feeling safe. Like you said, you love living

973
00:59:10,559 --> 00:59:12,920
where you live now because it feels safe to you.

974
00:59:13,000 --> 00:59:16,159
That was something you emphasized you when your manager called

975
00:59:16,199 --> 00:59:18,480
you out and did that and lied and whatever else.

976
00:59:18,679 --> 00:59:21,000
You weren't safe in that moment. I think you're a

977
00:59:21,079 --> 00:59:24,599
total sweetheart who is looking to feel safe. You are

978
00:59:24,760 --> 00:59:28,119
very successful at the things you do. You will put

979
00:59:28,159 --> 00:59:32,880
on great performances again and you are talented. So again,

980
00:59:32,960 --> 00:59:36,280
I'm not a shrink. I'm not, and I've known you

981
00:59:36,320 --> 00:59:38,599
for an hour at this point, but I can kind

982
00:59:38,599 --> 00:59:42,159
of get that sense and feel like you're legitimately a

983
00:59:42,159 --> 00:59:44,760
good person and you just have to find that in

984
00:59:44,800 --> 00:59:48,840
yourself to never get pushed down, never get weighed down

985
00:59:49,039 --> 00:59:52,639
by any of the negativity or you know, any of

986
00:59:52,639 --> 00:59:53,159
that stuff.

987
00:59:53,400 --> 00:59:55,239
Speaker 2: Thanks. I appreciate that.

988
00:59:56,039 --> 01:00:00,960
Speaker 3: Thank you let light on the texting, and you were

989
01:00:01,079 --> 01:00:04,960
just so so professional that I'm like, shoot, I got

990
01:00:04,960 --> 01:00:08,320
to use the introduction sincerely best, like like I did

991
01:00:08,400 --> 01:00:10,320
in like school, you know, I got to go back

992
01:00:10,320 --> 01:00:13,000
to that. I can't just say uh yeah yeah whenever.

993
01:00:14,480 --> 01:00:18,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, I can't talk like like I'm Midwestern. Sometimes we

994
01:00:18,880 --> 01:00:20,719
talk like like, you know, like we.

995
01:00:20,679 --> 01:00:24,440
Speaker 1: Talked about you sent me one email that looked like

996
01:00:24,559 --> 01:00:26,960
voice detext and I was like, oh no, I think

997
01:00:27,000 --> 01:00:28,760
she's being kidnapped right now.

998
01:00:28,960 --> 01:00:32,519
Speaker 3: When I was running out of I was running out

999
01:00:32,519 --> 01:00:36,679
of patients for my uh you know, write cursive, you know,

1000
01:00:36,960 --> 01:00:38,960
and a lot of kids not they.

1001
01:00:38,800 --> 01:00:39,920
Speaker 2: Can't do it anymore.

1002
01:00:40,360 --> 01:00:44,280
Speaker 3: But my school is so small that they they made

1003
01:00:44,320 --> 01:00:46,800
us do our cursive and we got graded on it.

1004
01:00:47,039 --> 01:00:48,719
Speaker 2: So I'm proud of that that I.

1005
01:00:48,639 --> 01:00:53,079
Speaker 3: Can write cursive and uh, I like philosophy and psychology,

1006
01:00:53,159 --> 01:00:56,239
and I like poetry, and but you know, and not

1007
01:00:56,440 --> 01:00:59,119
just that, I mean I like.

1008
01:01:00,599 --> 01:01:03,000
Speaker 2: What's actually real and.

1009
01:01:04,760 --> 01:01:11,239
Speaker 3: Real and the hard reality that people don't want to

1010
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:14,320
think about. And that's why I watched the movie I said,

1011
01:01:14,880 --> 01:01:18,760
starts out with this picket fences and then all of

1012
01:01:18,760 --> 01:01:21,960
a sudden, the guy has a stroke and it's very

1013
01:01:22,039 --> 01:01:26,480
happy sunny day in the neighborhood and it's spend. There's

1014
01:01:26,559 --> 01:01:30,039
these beetles underground or whatever they are, and it's the

1015
01:01:30,159 --> 01:01:35,760
underbelly of the society, and a lot of people won't

1016
01:01:36,400 --> 01:01:36,960
put them.

1017
01:01:37,719 --> 01:01:41,519
Speaker 2: I won't know about it, or they know what they

1018
01:01:41,639 --> 01:01:44,199
don't want to know, and they won't live live in

1019
01:01:45,159 --> 01:01:46,480
they don't take the risks.

1020
01:01:47,239 --> 01:01:49,800
Speaker 3: And that's why also too, I respect the industry that

1021
01:01:49,880 --> 01:01:52,800
And then like the girls that I know and the

1022
01:01:52,880 --> 01:01:56,280
guys and the directors and the people that put work

1023
01:01:56,320 --> 01:02:02,760
into an industry where their vone because in a lot

1024
01:02:02,760 --> 01:02:07,239
of ways and it puts them at risk and they

1025
01:02:07,280 --> 01:02:08,039
take the risk.

1026
01:02:08,320 --> 01:02:12,360
Speaker 1: And yeah, can I just point this one last thing

1027
01:02:12,360 --> 01:02:16,079
out real quick? You have pointed out a million times the.

1028
01:02:16,360 --> 01:02:19,000
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go to quick trip and get some I'm

1029
01:02:19,000 --> 01:02:21,320
gonna get it. I'll get a soda up out.

1030
01:02:22,039 --> 01:02:25,719
Speaker 1: You have pointed out a million times about how you

1031
01:02:25,800 --> 01:02:28,679
admire these people because they work as hard, they committed

1032
01:02:28,800 --> 01:02:32,000
to it, they take the risks. That's you. You're in

1033
01:02:32,039 --> 01:02:35,079
that category. I just want you to recognize. I hope

1034
01:02:35,079 --> 01:02:37,079
you recognize that. I think you do. I'm not questioning

1035
01:02:37,159 --> 01:02:40,079
you on that, but all these things that you admire,

1036
01:02:40,199 --> 01:02:43,079
you're doing that too. And you can go to bed

1037
01:02:43,119 --> 01:02:46,800
at night feeling good that you are doing it. You should,

1038
01:02:47,000 --> 01:02:47,320
you should.

1039
01:02:47,519 --> 01:02:49,519
Speaker 2: I should think of it like that, because because I

1040
01:02:49,599 --> 01:02:50,119
know it's hard.

1041
01:02:50,159 --> 01:02:53,320
Speaker 3: There's so many times where you're standing there alone, you're

1042
01:02:53,360 --> 01:02:56,920
just looking to buy your groceries and then either waiting

1043
01:02:57,639 --> 01:03:02,199
for an uber or a us and or you're just

1044
01:03:02,400 --> 01:03:04,679
alone with the body that you.

1045
01:03:06,440 --> 01:03:08,079
Speaker 2: Work with and.

1046
01:03:08,760 --> 01:03:13,199
Speaker 3: You have to find out who you are still and uh,

1047
01:03:14,039 --> 01:03:15,480
you don't always feel.

1048
01:03:20,239 --> 01:03:22,039
Speaker 2: You are allowed to know who you are.

1049
01:03:23,920 --> 01:03:27,159
Speaker 1: Well you are Scarlet Hampton my guests for the evening.

1050
01:03:27,199 --> 01:03:30,239
You know exactly where you can find Scarlet at Scarlet Hampton.

1051
01:03:30,719 --> 01:03:33,719
Make sure you follow across all social media. Please link

1052
01:03:34,280 --> 01:03:36,440
I'm talking to you everything in the episode.

1053
01:03:37,559 --> 01:03:39,920
Speaker 2: I've had fun and that's not like if I want

1054
01:03:39,920 --> 01:03:42,599
to like start doing like stand up open mics, just

1055
01:03:42,599 --> 01:03:47,559
staying about like comedy, because for me, it's like a

1056
01:03:47,559 --> 01:03:51,239
lot of people don't think like, oh, how how is

1057
01:03:51,239 --> 01:03:54,559
that funny? Like, but like you, you can make people

1058
01:03:54,639 --> 01:03:57,039
laugh if you can be.

1059
01:03:57,199 --> 01:04:03,679
Speaker 3: Honest and be honest about your own insecurities, your own mistakes,

1060
01:04:04,440 --> 01:04:09,519
your own reality, and it's vulnerable and if you could

1061
01:04:09,519 --> 01:04:13,880
be honest about it, it's not trying to make somebody laugh,

1062
01:04:13,960 --> 01:04:17,320
it's just be a light about it. To just be

1063
01:04:17,440 --> 01:04:21,599
a light about the harsh, harsh stuff. And I have

1064
01:04:21,679 --> 01:04:28,599
fun doing that because when you hurt, you know, and

1065
01:04:28,639 --> 01:04:31,440
then you can just say things you know what.

1066
01:04:31,320 --> 01:04:36,639
Speaker 2: I mean, I know exactly what I mean. Thanks figuring

1067
01:04:36,679 --> 01:04:37,000
it out.

1068
01:04:37,440 --> 01:04:39,960
Speaker 1: No, we're all still figuring out. Scott. Thank you so

1069
01:04:40,039 --> 01:04:41,119
much for coming on with me tonight.

1070
01:04:41,440 --> 01:04:45,360
Speaker 3: I appreciate you. Thank you bye tonight.