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Speaker 1: I'm starring Red Skelton with David Forster and his orchestra

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are singing Star Anita Alis, G G. Pearson, Vernon Felton,

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Pat McGee and Wonderful Smith and yours Truleard O'Connor. It's

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moisturiizes the new all new rolling nine oh three cigarette.

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Speaker 2: Listen.

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Speaker 1: That jet of fresh pure moisture stands for the new

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different moisturized Rowing nine oh three, new blend, new taste,

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new freshness. It's the new all new moisturized Rolling nine

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o three. It's a pleasure to bring him out with

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Bola Mare's popular coming in in the Star Cigarette program L.

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Speaker 3: Thank you very much in good evening, ladies and gentlemen,

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and thanks to Radio Mirror for that wonderful ride up

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and to Walter Winchell.

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Speaker 4: He had me tonight too. It was good.

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Speaker 1: O RN.

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Speaker 2: What's news? H what's news?

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Speaker 5: Oh?

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Speaker 4: I got a letter about.

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Speaker 3: That wish guy says wish she'd cut it out, No kidding.

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Speaker 6: The guy was driving home the other night, almost wrecked

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these carries and he was listening to the PROGRAMM and

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he fought all four tires out.

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Speaker 4: You know, mister Rawley gets mad when I kid likes

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you last week. I got a telegram from him in Louisville.

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Speaker 2: You know, was it anything serious?

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Speaker 4: Serious?

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Speaker 3: The Western Union boy that delivered the message brought along

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an extra cap in case I wanted to.

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Speaker 4: Go to work.

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Speaker 2: Well, you don't have to worry, Red, I don't have

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to worry, dude. That game is getting to be a

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new national pass.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, the game will help me out.

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Speaker 2: I must get one from my little boy, Ricky. Yeah.

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What do they sell the games for? Red?

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Speaker 4: What do they sell the games for?

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Speaker 2: That's what I asked.

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Speaker 4: Yes, Well I don't know, mister O'Connor.

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Speaker 3: Maybe just because they make more money that way.

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Speaker 6: There's a brilliant question in and oh.

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Speaker 2: Red, Speaking of games, didn't you have a wonderful time

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at the ice hockey game last week?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 4: I get a big kick out of that. Sitting up

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in the stand, what you know is full is knock

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each other all over that ice WA's for me? Mean

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you like to play, no, sup and stand and watch them?

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Speaker 2: Well, those ice hockey players are really rough, aren't they.

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Speaker 7: Yeah, they're just California drivers on ice skates.

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Speaker 6: You know what, a good California pedestrian could walk right

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through a hockey game and never look up from his racing.

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Speaker 1: Why do you know it's strange to see an ice

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hockey game in Hollywood.

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Speaker 5: I wonder where they get all that ice?

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Speaker 4: Yes, it would uh huh. Would you mind repeating that

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question again? I'm dying to win a box of Snickers.

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Speaker 1: Yes, I'll repeat, but I repeat one time and one

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time only.

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Speaker 4: You know I get a kick out of that guy on.

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Speaker 3: The radio, He says, I will say this one time

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and one time only.

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Speaker 4: Mal says to Paul, how do you aall? And you

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all says to Paul. Then he says, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

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I'm afraid you'll find it was. Maul says to Paul.

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But give that man a box of retread bubblegum. Let

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him blow out. You know those quiz masters, they're always

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so kind. You know, they sound so you can put

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it down. We're not going to read it anyway.

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Speaker 3: They all those quiz masters, they always sound so kind.

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Speaker 7: They say, oh, I'm so sorry.

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Speaker 4: Down even our hearts. They're saying, oh, you're stupid, bummy.

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Well we only knew what goes on in this business.

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Speaker 5: Well, I wonder where they get all that ice.

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Speaker 4: Well we're going back to that again.

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Speaker 3: Well, I know this is an imposition, but would you

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build that joke up again?

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Speaker 4: Please?

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Speaker 1: I wonder where they find all the ice in California

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to play hockey.

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Speaker 3: They just don't light the smudgepots for a couple of days.

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Maybe Florida will take those posters down of me, he

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says one a dead or alive.

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Speaker 1: Listen, that jet of fresh, pure moistures stands for the

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new all new Rollly nine o three cigarette. It's moisturized

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to stay fresh longer. It's moisture eyes to taste better.

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It's moisture eyes to smoke milder. Smoke this new modern

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Roly nine oh three. See for yourself that it's far

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better than any cigarette ever made before because it's moisturized

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for the revolutionary new nine oh three process, the greatest

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advance in cigarette making in twenty five years. It's the

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new all new Rolly nine oh three. I remember this

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about the new moisturized Rawly nine oh three. Medical science

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offers proof positive no other leading cigarette gives less nicotine,

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less throat irritating tars. Smokers follow the lead of Hetty Lamar,

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star of the new film Dishonored Lady Smoke the new

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moisturized rolling nine oh three. It's so much smoother, rich,

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you're better tasting, and you blend you freshness, you taste.

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You'll see the number nine o three on the government stamp.

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This rolling nine oh three is new, all new.

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Speaker 2: It's moisture eyes.

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Speaker 7: Anita Ellis sings, I can't help loving that man of mind.

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Speaker 8: Fish gotta see it, It's gotta fly. I've got a.

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Speaker 9: Love long night till I die.

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Speaker 8: Love him, mad man of mine. Tell me he's laves,

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tell me he's slow, Tell me I'm crazy. Maybe I

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know and love a mad man of man.

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Speaker 1: When he goes away, that's a rainy day.

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Speaker 4: When he comes back that.

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Speaker 8: Fall shut he can come o.

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Speaker 9: The lads confused.

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Speaker 8: Without love bad man.

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Speaker 3: The Skelton scrap Book of Satire. We're not good boy,

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We're a loud.

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Speaker 5: Chapter one careless driving.

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Speaker 4: Way, be careful, hush, I'm driving this day.

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Speaker 8: Well, let's get out of the back seat.

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Speaker 3: We must be getting into town. The pedestrians are getting

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a little trickier.

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Speaker 10: Really, watchat balk in the middle of the roat.

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Speaker 4: Oh no, they're right, yes there is Oh no, oh yes,

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sah All right, now, can you be so stupid? Really?

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Don't you love me? I think they're a most beautiful

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woman in the world. Now, I bet you hate me

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for saying that, don't you? Oh why should I hate you?

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You told me one time because you couldn't stand the liar.

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You certainly have changed when you first started courting me.

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You lovely used to bring me flout because I thought

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you were dead.

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Speaker 3: Here's the.

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Speaker 4: Road horn? What kind of for your road hole? How

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to make that road?

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Speaker 9: Holly?

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Speaker 10: It's like the little bacon off though, really, you'll kill

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yourself that way.

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Speaker 4: I don't have to look so happy about it, you.

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Speaker 2: Hear that?

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Speaker 4: Yeah? The police he's coming.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think there's gonna be a little trouble, So

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keep your big nose out of it.

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Speaker 8: Well, my nose isn't so bad.

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Speaker 4: Oh No, how come you have to part it in

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the mid see your face? Good evening?

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Speaker 5: Friends.

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Speaker 1: Didn't you see us signaling you at that intersection back there?

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Speaker 4: Just yeah, I might say that you're the only thing

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I missed all night.

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Speaker 5: And you any idea how fast you were driving? Bug?

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Speaker 4: Well? My speed armor thory zero that goes all the

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way around.

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Speaker 5: You're going eighty five. I don't think you even know

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how to drive.

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Speaker 4: Oh yes, I do you know what the break is? Yeah?

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I in the breaks day? Where is it in the

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repair shot?

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Speaker 1: But don't you realize you're endangering your life speeding in

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a knockout?

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Speaker 5: You're leppy like this?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm gonna get more new one. You know, I'm

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gonna stay in one of the womens. My favorite brunette

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will be old and gray before Bob Hope gives me

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a chivalry. What is this? This is a This is

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a forty sixth model I'm driving. It's right on a

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registration card there, eighteen forty six.

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Speaker 5: I suppose you have an alibi for being in such

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a hurry that I have.

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Speaker 4: I'm hurrying home. I'm a very sick man. This world

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ain't long for me. It's sick.

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Speaker 5: Eh. What's the matter with you?

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Speaker 4: Haven't been able to grieve for a month?

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Speaker 1: Oh?

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Speaker 5: Come now, how can you live without breathing?

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Speaker 4: I don't know.

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Speaker 5: How?

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Speaker 4: A lot of willpower?

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Speaker 5: Again, let me see your driver's lascense.

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Speaker 1: There is wait a second, This isn't a driver's license,

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that's a dog license.

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Speaker 4: I also drive a greyhound, Bud.

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Speaker 5: How come you don't have a driver's last.

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Speaker 4: But say, don't give him for driving on the sidewalk.

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Speaker 5: Ask you why only a jerker drive on the side.

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Speaker 4: Well, now you know.

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Speaker 5: What's your name?

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Speaker 3: Pudding team asked me again. I'll tell you the tame

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tattood right there on the forehead.

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Speaker 1: You want to know, Oh, Willie Lumplin, will you up

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plump William plump?

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Speaker 4: Here on my driving permit? There?

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Speaker 1: Hey, it says here not valid unless wearing glasses. Where's

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the glasses?

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Speaker 4: Every time I put them on the liking before.

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Speaker 5: You're supposed to wear them? Dope, let's see here.

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Speaker 4: I didn't get it at rehearsal.

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Speaker 5: Say, your face looks awfully wrinkled in this picture.

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Speaker 4: You hacked up my picture. That's my thumb bred.

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Speaker 1: On confe of speeding, Do you realize you were weaving

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all over the street and you didn't have your lights on,

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and it has no license plates and no registration.

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Speaker 4: Card practically a pedestrian.

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Speaker 5: Does this car belong to you?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Three more payment night, drive it in the daytime. No

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more payments than I'm only two years behind.

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Speaker 5: I'll have to give you a ticket for speeding. And

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here's another for going through a stop land.

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Speaker 1: It's not another for making a left turn without a

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signal and another ticket for arguing with an office?

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Speaker 4: Would you just give me those tickets? Now? Show you

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what I'm going to do with them? There, delinquent, I

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ain't going to help you pick them up. With you,

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we'll know you be arrested and throwing jail.

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Speaker 5: And with this drive on, you'll get high days.

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Speaker 4: Don't go give them I days. We what are you

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gonna do with him?

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Speaker 5: I'd like to punch him.

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Speaker 4: You ain't who out?

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Speaker 1: Just me myself and I oh ganging up on me.

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You know it's a good thing. I'm an officer. For

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two cents, i'd punch you in the nose.

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Speaker 4: I got two cents here there now I gave you

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to punch me.

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Speaker 5: No oh, pipe down, hey, pipe me?

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Speaker 4: I dare are you? I double d you do it?

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Speaker 2: Well?

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Speaker 4: Don't I get a receipt?

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Speaker 2: Listen?

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Speaker 1: Black Jet of Fresh pure Moisture stands for the new,

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all new Rolling nine oh three cigarette. It's moisture eyes

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to stay fresh longer. It's moisture eyes to taste better.

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It's moisturized to smoke.

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Speaker 2: Milders.

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Speaker 1: Smoke this new modern moisturize Rolling nine o three see

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for yourself that it's far better than any cigarette ever

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made before. It's new, all new, you blend you freshness,

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00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:18,679
you taste, and remember this about the new moisturized Rolling

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nine oh three Medical Science offers proof positive tests certified

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by a jury of fourteen doctors based on a method

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used by the United States government, prove that no other

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leading cigarette gives you less nicotine, less throat irritating tars

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smoke than.

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Speaker 2: You all new rolling nine o three. It's moisturizes.

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Speaker 4: David Forster and his Roly Cigarette Orchestra play mamsell j

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In Dent in.

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Speaker 9: Games S.

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Speaker 4: Chapter two, The Cat of Distinction sing a Dixpene A

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puppet for your life. Nah, I know where Grandpa got

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his blood?

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Speaker 8: God, I.

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Speaker 4: Where have you been? I went over courtiou street mister

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and missus Chard thought. You know, they just moved in

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acrostious street. What did they think of you? You're gonna

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move out? What you mean? Well, they told me to

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come in and make me skill for you. Oh, some

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people never learned that that was your wrong thing to say. Boy,

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I taking the men one jor You didn't do that.

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You're kidding me. You keep laughing. You know you wait

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till you get a bill from them. More. You say

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what you're doing?

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Speaker 6: You?

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Speaker 10: Oh, I'm just straightening up, cleaning out some of the

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j Oh, that's a good idea.

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Speaker 4: Can I had this big black book.

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Speaker 10: Oh that's my old picture album. I haven't looked through

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it in the look through it. D look at all

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these old faded snapshots like, oh, who is pretty widow girl?

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Speaker 4: Oh that's me when I was eighteen?

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Speaker 10: Boy, you with some kick jor that's what I get

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for letting you listen to Dennis Day.

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Speaker 4: I put this up on my own. He had nothing

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to do it.

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Speaker 7: Boy, you shoe had not your hair on him. Look,

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but you had to climb on a step ladder the

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Cormon Union.

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Speaker 4: That wasn't all real hair.

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Speaker 10: Every woman wears rolls in her hair, your imitation hair rolls,

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and they're.

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Speaker 4: Called rats nowadays. Shoes you got washing your hair? Boy,

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ain't you gonna say blessed me with a what? Oh? No, yeah,

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you boy? What a family I got?

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Speaker 5: Boy?

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Speaker 4: And my grandma's got watching her hair. My grandfather's got

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batching a belfry. Now, don't just hit me.

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Speaker 7: Hey, who's this guy here with a handobar mustache and

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the bicycle body?

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Speaker 10: Lets Your grandfather and he was courting me. This picture

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was taken long long ago.

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Speaker 7: Oh he should look different standing there all by himself,

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nobody holding him up.

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Speaker 4: Now that's enough. Now, hey, who's this funny? Looking further?

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Look at them bluck teeth on him.

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Speaker 7: Boy, he looked like he swallowed a piano and is

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trying to spit out the keys by them some choppers, ain't.

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Speaker 10: Now, that's no way to talk about your uncle Jim Howton.

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He was well known all over the country.

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Speaker 4: He was what's he wearing that striped shoe for? He

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looked like a gebra Don't he stop asking questions?

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Speaker 11: Why?

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Speaker 4: What's the matter? He's got his gebra shoes? You he

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must have been awful busy. Look he's he telephone number

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on his Jack Junior.

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Speaker 7: Look at me.

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Speaker 4: Yes, you must never mention your uncle Jim to anyone

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a jail bird.

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Speaker 7: Huh Hey, look picture, Look, Look look grandpa out in

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front of which shall loo look lo?

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Speaker 4: I'll look later. You better look now from the person

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on his face, I think he's going to go back

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in a minute. You're just too smart for a child

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your side. Oh no, no, don't hit me. What you're

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trying to do is shorten't me?

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Speaker 3: You hear me.

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Speaker 4: Yes, you didn't hurt me. No, you didn't like me. Well,

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if I didn't hurt you, why are you crying? Well,

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I don't want you to think I don't appreciate your efforts.

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Come on, get away from that trunk now, I'll close

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the lid for you.

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Speaker 10: Jenior, be careful, you might get your fingers causing that

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trunk and then it won't lack.

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Speaker 4: Yes, Oh, you sure do love me, don't you.

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Speaker 6: Huh?

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Speaker 4: Go on downstairs, Okay, I'm going there. Go down there.

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That's hiding down the many. What happened you know that?

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That you with no arms on her? Yes, you got

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laid in ahead the mash. Now why do you do

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things like that?

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Speaker 7: Because I got nothing to occupy me with a delinquent life.

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That's why you no jury drive to help me with me? Probably,

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but I just had so money.

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Speaker 4: You know, I got what to do. So go up, Grandma.

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If I had your camera, I could take him. But

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you didn't have me own album like you got. You

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still got a nice camera, but you know you take

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pictures of me. You don't why we've got lots of

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pictures of you.

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Speaker 10: Look, here's a picture taken two days after you were born.

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Speaker 4: That's your father arguing with the doctor in the background.

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You get a picture of the start that brought me. Yes,

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and we turned it over to the FBI. I no

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one picture. You don't have no more. Boy. That shing

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of me on that bare rug, you don't have that

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sing no more? Did you tear it up? Yes? I did?

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Speaker 7: Oh goodness, that was so embarrassing. You know I had

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nothing none but me handcuffs and her smile.

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Speaker 4: Look, Junior, will you please go out and play? Can

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you take some pictures? Oh?

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Speaker 10: Yes, here, here's my old box car. Boy, you can

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play like you're taking pictures with that.

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Speaker 4: It's broken, but what he doesn't know won't hurt it.

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I know who broke it, and what she doesn't know

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won't hurt me either.

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Speaker 11: I've got to take some tic A going to take

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00:25:40,559 --> 00:25:48,880
swing with here? Will or there's mister Jan Fowler, the

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man next door.

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Speaker 4: I'm gonna go over with you. Well, Junior, Hello, Hello, Hello,

355
00:25:56,440 --> 00:25:59,000
put the work in your gardener? Where are you carrying

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00:25:59,039 --> 00:25:59,359
that box?

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Speaker 2: Camera?

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Speaker 4: Not when he takes the picture? Would you like for

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me to take your pure Oh?

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Speaker 2: I'd be flattered.

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Speaker 7: What do you want me to stand stand right over

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there now, oh there, Now, I look to your singing

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00:26:07,640 --> 00:26:08,440
focus here in there?

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Speaker 4: Now now back up? Yes, they're worry a bit more.

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00:26:11,039 --> 00:26:13,279
I wait them more more look at me, don't look

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00:26:13,319 --> 00:26:15,079
in your back. You just keep backing up there.

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Speaker 1: Well, I don't want to get too close to the

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fish pond.

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Speaker 4: I'll let you know. I let you know. Yes, back

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up one more step or two?

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Speaker 5: Well, how's there now?

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00:26:24,599 --> 00:26:27,160
Speaker 7: I mean good shelf says, lett him stay there, but

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00:26:27,400 --> 00:26:29,079
mean bad shelf says one more step?

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00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:29,680
Speaker 4: Should do it?

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Speaker 7: Well, I'll think it over after I get this picture here, Junior.

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00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:41,880
I'm waiting in the second you'll be waiting. Just back

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00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:43,160
up a couple of more steps.

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00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,119
Speaker 4: Now, Oh boy, wait a minute, what's behind that boy?

379
00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:49,759
Where I don't you know you? Oh what your cat? Good?

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00:26:49,839 --> 00:26:50,920
Speaker 2: Heavens fall cat?

381
00:26:52,480 --> 00:27:00,200
Speaker 4: Oh cat? Maybe I had more bird bought in back boy? Yeah,

382
00:27:00,279 --> 00:27:03,279
pretty cat you it boy? You can? Oh boy? Look

383
00:27:03,359 --> 00:27:05,799
at super streak down his back that's where that's where

384
00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:13,160
wall I gonna take you. Sh what kind of how

385
00:27:13,240 --> 00:27:17,480
did you yo? You better get down? Now get over

386
00:27:17,559 --> 00:27:22,079
there with you. Don't get too close to me. I'm

387
00:27:22,119 --> 00:27:27,559
gonna make you the feature album by you think you

388
00:27:27,759 --> 00:27:30,599
know joy?

389
00:27:30,759 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 2: He boiled he is.

390
00:27:33,440 --> 00:27:40,680
Speaker 4: He won't keep till morning. Joy there what about Look

391
00:27:40,720 --> 00:27:41,559
if you're gonna.

392
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:47,440
Speaker 3: Partner, shut off your motor, I think got I talked

393
00:27:47,480 --> 00:27:48,759
to Karl Jarman about you.

394
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:51,759
Speaker 4: He already knows summer. But look, look, I gonna give

395
00:27:51,759 --> 00:27:53,799
you a bashed boy. I can't sand you no more.

396
00:27:56,440 --> 00:28:02,680
Speaker 10: Here, I ask no more but here, come down, Okay,

397
00:28:03,079 --> 00:28:04,079
get you going, go home?

398
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:08,839
Speaker 4: Tack you get him go. He's trying to get away

399
00:28:08,880 --> 00:28:12,519
from himself. I wonder if he ever heard your fill

400
00:28:12,599 --> 00:28:16,039
now number five? Boy, he's going, but that's milk. You're here?

401
00:28:17,079 --> 00:28:19,000
Speaker 5: Who wait?

402
00:28:19,039 --> 00:28:25,599
Speaker 4: That poor cat forgot something myself? You come here to me? Okay, no, no,

403
00:28:25,799 --> 00:28:30,000
don't set away, Camra. What do you hold your nose?

404
00:28:30,039 --> 00:28:33,000
You mightn't from me for Nemo open your door and

405
00:28:33,079 --> 00:28:37,599
have money, Nema, no more, y'all, please open the door.

406
00:28:39,400 --> 00:28:40,880
Your widow stinker is waiting.

407
00:28:51,160 --> 00:28:53,240
Speaker 5: We hope you like our program, wauf you will have

408
00:28:53,240 --> 00:28:55,079
forgot like going lex.

409
00:28:55,079 --> 00:28:57,680
Speaker 7: Yarram missus Red skelt and saying goodbye now and thanks

410
00:28:57,680 --> 00:29:00,200
for listening, and thanks for buying Rawleigh. And remember York

411
00:29:00,319 --> 00:29:02,359
is a pretty nice country. You'd better start taking care

412
00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:09,599
of it, sir.

413
00:29:09,519 --> 00:29:13,119
Speaker 12: Walter Raleigh, the pipe tobacco that raats superior on all counts.

414
00:29:13,279 --> 00:29:15,920
Check them a rich ripe, full bodied, burly blessed, Sir

415
00:29:16,039 --> 00:29:19,519
Walter Raleigh. Pipe tobacco mellowed with rum for extra smoothness,

416
00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:21,359
deep down satisfying goodness.

417
00:29:21,400 --> 00:29:23,920
Speaker 5: That's Sir Walter Raleigh. Pipe tobacco, clean.

418
00:29:23,759 --> 00:29:27,160
Speaker 2: Smoking all the way down. No soggy heel leaves, only

419
00:29:27,200 --> 00:29:28,279
a clean dry egg.

420
00:29:28,319 --> 00:29:29,839
Speaker 5: And that's Sir Walter Raleigh.

421
00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:33,680
Speaker 2: Pipe tobacco, crimp cut for slow even cool Bernie. Yes,

422
00:29:33,920 --> 00:29:35,079
Sir Walter Raleigh.

423
00:29:35,119 --> 00:29:38,960
Speaker 1: Pipe tobacco smoke, Sir Walter Raleigh, the quality pipe tobacco

424
00:29:39,079 --> 00:29:42,680
of America. They have been great Independence Day. Remember, folks,

425
00:29:42,720 --> 00:29:44,519
the Great War Relief is worthy of your support. Ronald

426
00:29:44,519 --> 00:29:46,119
Williamson and bite you bother you're listening during the week.

427
00:29:46,160 --> 00:29:47,720
Listen to People Are Funny with Art Lincoln in next

428
00:29:47,720 --> 00:29:49,880
Friday Night, and join us again with bread Scout next Tuesday.

429
00:29:50,039 --> 00:29:51,880
Red Scout is hurting his program to the courtesy of

430
00:29:51,920 --> 00:29:54,680
met Well, Go to Mayor. Red Scouts brought NBC, the

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00:29:54,799 --> 00:29:56,160
National Broadcasting Company