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Speaker 1: Some lessons are best learned slowly rather than all at once,

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such as don't attempt to move rapidly indoors after darkness,

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especially if it's not your house. It has led to

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grief for numerous persons, few of whom will ever tell

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you about it, so it's a lesson you'll have to

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learn on your own, which is the best way. I,

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for example, have learned do vigorous exercise while you still can,

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because if you don't, then you can't jump jacks. For example.

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One day they're a piece of cake, and so you

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figure why waste the time, and then you try to

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do one, and it's very humorous. Same is true of running.

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One day you can lope along like an elderly but

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still respectable antelope, and then one day strangers will stop

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you and ask if there's anything they can do to help. No,

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there probably is not. There's always an excuse for not exercising,

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maybe a religious prohibition, some hereditary syndrome that makes you

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feel desperate when you breathe hard, maybe an allergic reaction

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to your own perspiration. But these can be overcome with help.

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Use is that I hated high school. Fayed hated it

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with a passion, the chin ups, the rope climb, the

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running somersault, the running dive over the horse, the wrestling,

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the ridicule, the bullying, and I despised walking naked into

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a shower with other young men. I still do. After

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I graduated, I made it a point not to join

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other naked men to take showers. When invited, I have declined.

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If this is a favorite activity of yours, I do

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not judge. For some men this may be the high

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point of their week. Don't say this is self loathing

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on my part, because it isn't. It's the other men

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I loathe, not myself, and I'm not homophobic. I have

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many gay male friends, and they do not undress when

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they come to my home. I'm perfectly okay taking a

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shower by myself or with my wife on very rare occasions,

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such as my seventieth and eightieth birthdays, and the feast

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day of the Assumption in August, and on October twenty seventh,

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the day on which Jack Morris pitched the Minnesota Twins

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to a one to nothing victory in the seventh game

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of the nineteen ninety one World Series. Nonetheless, I do

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exercises every morning and it makes me feel good, and

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feeling good is the point. Another lesson to learn over

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time is a feast should be taken in moderation and

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always followed by an effervescent sodium by carbonate people, even mature,

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intelligent people with advanced degrees, have sat down at a

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groaning board to platters of roasted wildlife and savory tubers,

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coagulated milk, protein, leafy grains and cruciferous delicacies and baked desserts,

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and in the joyfulness of the moment, perhaps someone has

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commenced from an institution other than a penal one, or

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perhaps someone has had a memoir published or been declared

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innocent by a jury of his peer years. The diners

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overestimate their capacity. Some people experience this on a regular basis,

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and I understand there is treatment for it. And I

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also feel there is such a thing as saying no,

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thank you and pushing the plate away. I'm doing that

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this morning. I love staking eggs for breakfast, and I

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am not having it this morning. I last had it

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three weeks ago. I am still living. There Usually is

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someone who can do something better than you can, and

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the time comes when you should let them do it.

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This happened to me. My wife Jenny took the car keys.

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She's terrific driver. The world is better without a man

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with poor vision careening around the roadways. I honestly believe

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this to be true. We grow wise with the years.

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This is the theory. God has blessed this country lavishly.

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Brilliant immigrants have come for freedom from the fevers of

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Europe and the grinding poverty of leftover colonial empires. And

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their ingenuity and spirit and wit, and their adoration of

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this new world have enriched us each and everyone. Diversities, diversity.

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We simply are a diverse and fascinating assemblage of wonders

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and oddities, dreamers and floaters, four h belly acres, Unitarians, Contrarians, Librarians, Egalitarians, Wagnerians.

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A person walks through town and never lacks for entertainment.

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God bless American. He has done so before, and we

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still need it. Just released a Prairie Home Companion's fiftieth

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anniversary two CD set recorded live at the Fitzgerald Theater.

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Garrison Keeler and the Gang celebrate with music, sketches, and

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of course the news from Lake Wobegon. Get to tales

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at Garrisonkeeler dot com.