Speaker 1: All right, let's get started on the Minnesota Goodbye. I'm
Speaker 1: going to start off with an email from Tristan, and
Speaker 1: Tristan says, what is y'all's favorite summer activity around the area. Dave,
Speaker 1: great job on Pike's Peak and Tristan, my favorite summer
Speaker 1: activity around the area. God, that's a really good question I.
Speaker 2: Answer for you.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Please, I would say, probably you going to walk in
Speaker 3: like Lake Minwasta or something. Isn't there a spot you
Speaker 3: like going there?
Speaker 1: You know? That is is my favorite spot to hike,
Speaker 1: because it's really it's not remote at all, but when
Speaker 1: you're on the back parts of Lake Minwashta, it feels
Speaker 1: like you're in the middle of nowhere. It really is
Speaker 1: like whoa first time was out there? I thought I
Speaker 1: got lost? Yeah, and I wasn't lost at all. I
Speaker 1: just kept following the trail in pretty soon, Oh there's
Speaker 1: my car, but I felt like it was lost. I
Speaker 1: would also say motorcycling. Oh yeah, I just love riding
Speaker 1: the motorcycle. You know, we don't do it as often
Speaker 1: as we should because we've been so busy this summer.
Speaker 1: Like today, you know, I got a couple of appointments today.
Speaker 1: I gotta get this thing chopped off. Well, they canceled
Speaker 1: that right.
Speaker 2: I think that you don't have that any I had
Speaker 2: a dermatology.
Speaker 1: Appointment again, a mole or something that grew on the
Speaker 1: side of my face, so I need to get that
Speaker 1: looked at. But I'm also going to Livia later today
Speaker 1: for the B twelve LIGHTO injection for energy and weight loss,
Speaker 1: and I think that's really cool. And then tomorrow I
Speaker 1: leave for San Diego for a morning show conference and
Speaker 1: I'm going to present an award to another DJ. I
Speaker 1: won the award last year. I presented to him this year.
Speaker 1: I get there tomorrow night, present the award at noon Friday,
Speaker 1: leave at three on Friday. I don't get home until
Speaker 1: eleven pm on Friday.
Speaker 3: You're flighting at three pm. You're making me nervous with
Speaker 3: the tightness of you having to present and then.
Speaker 2: Be on a flight.
Speaker 1: It is a little bit. Yeah. That's a good point, Jenny. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I work.
Speaker 2: With radio DJs. Do you think they're going to be
Speaker 2: on time?
Speaker 1: No, good point.
Speaker 3: They'll be on time for that. They do keep a
Speaker 3: pretty strict schedule for that stuff.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you've been to this before. And then ABA's
Speaker 1: fifth birthday. Fourth birthday party is on Saturday, and then
Speaker 1: next week we're going to be at Mall of America
Speaker 1: and then after that we're going to be at a
Speaker 1: happy hour next price. So we're pretty busy.
Speaker 4: We're busy people.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, what.
Speaker 1: About you summer activity, Jenny.
Speaker 3: Mine would be probably rollerblading and biking and sometimes running,
Speaker 3: but I can't run in like super hot heat.
Speaker 4: So yeah, you and pickleball right now?
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and pickleball, but I just got into that,
Speaker 3: so I don't know if I could put that on
Speaker 3: their as favorite.
Speaker 2: I think that's going to be year round for me
Speaker 2: now too.
Speaker 4: So yeah, mine's just walking. I walk every day if
Speaker 4: I can.
Speaker 5: If the weather is nice, I could go on five
Speaker 5: six seven mile walks, and usually it's just around like
Speaker 5: the lakes and the cities, or I go up and
Speaker 5: down just streets of like Linden Hills and just look
Speaker 5: at people's houses.
Speaker 1: And that's impressive. I mean that's a long walk, it is.
Speaker 5: But when it's like seventy five degrees like yesterday, I've
Speaker 5: so it's been the Fringe festival, so I'm not getting
Speaker 5: a lot of sleep, which is my own choice.
Speaker 4: It's fine.
Speaker 5: It's once a year, but I've been trying to like
Speaker 5: prioritize going home and taking like a long nap to
Speaker 5: like get.
Speaker 4: Ahead of sleep.
Speaker 5: And yesterday it was just so beautiful out that I
Speaker 5: was just like, Wow, I guess I'm going to go
Speaker 5: on a walk instead and just sleep for twenty minutes.
Speaker 5: And yeah, but it's so nice out I can't not. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I have to, because why would I not go on
Speaker 5: a walk now when in four months I won't be
Speaker 5: going out for four months.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, so we're taking it like September, October, November,
Speaker 1: so yeah, sure enough, Yep, you're right, all right, next
Speaker 1: one does don't say my name, but I only used
Speaker 1: a first name, so I hopefully it'll be okay. I
Speaker 1: was listening to the podcast and heard you guys talk
Speaker 1: about what a porn star does when they are forty. Well,
Speaker 1: my daughter's dad took off to another state in the
Speaker 1: two thousands and came back a handful of years later
Speaker 1: and had to admit that he had been doing porn.
Speaker 1: I will go back and bleep out the name of
Speaker 1: this person because there is a little bit more identification
Speaker 1: than I would want to pass along there. He had
Speaker 1: been recognized on the Internet and the news was starting
Speaker 1: to come out. Not that it matters, but it was
Speaker 1: gay porn and that added an extra more secretive element. Well,
Speaker 1: now he's forty two and he will not discuss it.
Speaker 1: I don't know him like that anymore, but it does
Speaker 1: feel like he's struggling with big regrets that affect his
Speaker 1: life even now. I'm sure it's not like that for everybody,
Speaker 1: but he can't be the only one. I love you,
Speaker 1: thank you, we love you back. Because this came up
Speaker 1: on the show. Was it on the show or on
Speaker 1: the podcast?
Speaker 3: It was on the actual show that we talked about it,
Speaker 3: because we talked about do you regret it when you're
Speaker 3: forty or something, and we just kind of said what
Speaker 3: we thought people might think. And I think that some
Speaker 3: people probably do. But I think some people might also
Speaker 3: have the mindset of, like, no, I'm proud of like
Speaker 3: doing that when I was young and hot and whatever.
Speaker 1: I think that my logic would tell me that you
Speaker 1: will regret it because you are porn as forever. So
Speaker 1: if you make a porn now and you're young and
Speaker 1: beautiful and you're twenty two and you got a smoking
Speaker 1: body and you've got nothing to be ashamed of at all,
Speaker 1: and it's not necessarily shameful, but it's something that it's
Speaker 1: kind of like a tattoo that you kind of regret,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. If you get a tattoo of, like,
Speaker 1: I don't know, angels wings on your back, it's a
Speaker 1: bad example. But let's go with it. You might think
Speaker 1: this is really cool. I really like this. I'm twenty six,
Speaker 1: I look amazing with my you know, my big angel
Speaker 1: wing tattoo. But then you get a little bit older
Speaker 1: and now you're forty five, and you go, hm, I
Speaker 1: kind of wish I hadn't done that one.
Speaker 3: Maybe yeah, no, I mean for sure would you guys? Ever, Okay,
Speaker 3: so say you're single and you find someone you really
Speaker 3: like them. What if they had a previous like OnlyFans
Speaker 3: with their ex and they were doing like sexual things
Speaker 3: in it. Would you be able to get over that?
Speaker 3: Because I don't think I could question.
Speaker 5: Oh I think I could, because that's their past, Like
Speaker 5: I mean, they did what they wanted to do at
Speaker 5: the time, and it's like, okay, well, I'm not gonna
Speaker 5: poo poo on you for just.
Speaker 3: And I agree because I can get over like Andrew
Speaker 3: obviously has a pass. I have a pass, like I
Speaker 3: can get over things like that, but I feel like
Speaker 3: to put that on the internet, I don't know. I
Speaker 3: would probably be a tempted to see if she's better
Speaker 3: than me, and then it would like be scarred in
Speaker 3: my head and I'd probably think about that in moments
Speaker 3: I shouldn't be thinking about that, like, wait, she did
Speaker 3: this here.
Speaker 4: Don't go looking for it.
Speaker 3: But that's what I'm saying is I would be tempted
Speaker 3: to I would be so tempted.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think I would too if I were just
Speaker 1: like you said, if I were single and I met
Speaker 1: somebody who's like, yeah, you know, back in the early nineties,
Speaker 1: I did porn, and I'd be like, well, I gotta
Speaker 1: go watch. And if she said no, don't watch, I'd
Speaker 1: be like, I'm sorry, I think I have to. But
Speaker 1: I think that might be kind of a deal breaker
Speaker 1: because to me, I really do because I'm human, and
Speaker 1: I would like to say, bow, it's in the past,
Speaker 1: it doesn't bother me. It'd be kind of like if
Speaker 1: somebody got a dui. I'm trying to think as I
Speaker 1: say this, if they got maybe a series of duys
Speaker 1: and now they're like, ah, you know what, I haven't
Speaker 1: drank in a long time. I'd still be like, I
Speaker 1: don't know.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 1: There's a difference between porn and a dui. A porn
Speaker 1: is forever a dui. If you stop drinking and you
Speaker 1: have remorse and if you change your life, then I
Speaker 1: think it's a different thing.
Speaker 5: But I don't think you need remorse about doing porn,
Speaker 5: because like, what if they did porn because one they
Speaker 5: needed the money and they like, you know what, I've
Speaker 5: got a hot bot, I'm proud of it. I need money,
Speaker 5: and this is a good way to do it. I
Speaker 5: feel like it's more empowering than anything, unless they're doing
Speaker 5: like creepy, scary porn. Then I mean, I think, like, go,
Speaker 5: if someone said if I was dating someone and they
Speaker 5: were like, by the way I did porn, I'd be like, dope,
Speaker 5: can I see? And then I'd be like, Wow, this
Speaker 5: is great, look at you.
Speaker 1: And it could be a little sexism on my part
Speaker 1: because I think that guys don't want to feel like
Speaker 1: they were outperformed by another guy. Yeah, So if I'm
Speaker 1: watching porn and this guy's got a big old wang
Speaker 1: and he's like you know, and he's like just banging
Speaker 1: away and she's like screaming and going, oh my god.
Speaker 4: Yeah she's acting.
Speaker 3: Say that's super fake, stupid sex, and she's still.
Speaker 5: Choosing to be with you, even though she's had this
Speaker 5: giant wang before.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I think it's cool, But I guess.
Speaker 3: I just also want to clarify that my example wasn't
Speaker 3: about just porn in general. Mine was about you being
Speaker 3: in a relationship prior with someone that you did like
Speaker 3: and only fans with. Like, I think there's a little
Speaker 3: bit of a difference between you going and banging and
Speaker 3: doing random like stuff with people you don't have a
Speaker 3: relationship with versus you had like an only fan that
Speaker 3: was successful or something with your previous partner.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but yeah, real, Will you remind me because I'll
Speaker 1: forget to go back and put a bleep through her name,
Speaker 1: Because I want to make sure that you know, if
Speaker 1: you send in an email to the show and you
Speaker 1: want to stay anonymous, I want you to feel confident
Speaker 1: that we will respect that. Okay, somebody sent in a
Speaker 1: picture of brief jerky. It is edible meat underwear. It
Speaker 1: is underwear made out of beef jerky. Now I don't
Speaker 1: know why they sent it in.
Speaker 5: I think it's because I was talking about swimmers this
Speaker 5: morning looking like beef jerky because they're so muscly.
Speaker 1: Okay, the Olympic swimmers. Yeah yeah, okay, gotcha. Well, thank
Speaker 1: you Kate for sending that in so much.
Speaker 3: And we're so sick because all I could think about
Speaker 3: when you said swimmers was sperm just now, because we
Speaker 3: also brought that up earlier, and I was like, Jenny, swimmers, I.
Speaker 4: Was thinking of the Olympic swimmer.
Speaker 1: I know, well, we talked about the Olympic swimmers, and
Speaker 1: you know, I'm not attracted to men, but I can
Speaker 1: definitely look at a guy and go, dang, he has
Speaker 1: got the look at the swimmers. They have the most muscular,
Speaker 1: almost fat free body, and they've got the V shaped torso,
Speaker 1: but they're not overly muscular. It's like, and I told Susan,
Speaker 1: I said, would you hook up with one of those guys?
Speaker 1: And Susan is just like, she just doesn't play that way.
Speaker 1: Whereas if I asked somebody may maybe you have asked Jenny,
Speaker 1: like would you hook up with one of those guys?
Speaker 1: Hell yeah? And Susan is like, no, what.
Speaker 3: Does she say she says no, or she's trying to
Speaker 3: be respectful, or she doesn't.
Speaker 1: Like when I ask things like that. She's just like no,
Speaker 1: why gross? Stop?
Speaker 5: See I think that's I think that's weird because it's like,
Speaker 5: are you Is she trying to come off as that
Speaker 5: she doesn't find anyone attractive because she's married to you?
Speaker 4: I don't know, because that's a bunch of bull of corn.
Speaker 1: I don't know. Oh, I I'm not really sure. I
Speaker 1: mean I sit there and I say, wow, that woman
Speaker 1: is beautiful, and I when you know, I mean, nobody
Speaker 1: wants to hear about who I want to hook up
Speaker 1: with because gross. But I don't have a problem expressing
Speaker 1: that to her. But she just doesn't vibe that way.
Speaker 1: So you know, all right? Next one, don't say my
Speaker 1: name Dave van Crue. How did you process life? Change? Well,
Speaker 1: let's move on. My now ex moved out months ago
Speaker 1: and we broke up a few months ago. It was
Speaker 1: not a health relationship. We started dating young and have
Speaker 1: been together for almost a decade. Another change, I'm moving
Speaker 1: in with a relative to save money, but leaving a
Speaker 1: town that I love and have lived in for ten years.
Speaker 1: I also might be losing my job at the end
Speaker 1: of the year and trying to navigate the dating feel.
Speaker 1: Needless to say, I got a lot of life changing,
Speaker 1: got changes going on right now, and I'm reaching out
Speaker 1: if you've got any advice on how to cope or
Speaker 1: do you have any stories of a lot of life
Speaker 1: change in one year to make mine feel more normal.
Speaker 1: I'm going to go ahead and just differentiate between a
Speaker 1: positive life change and a negative life change, and I
Speaker 1: think you've got a little bit of both in here.
Speaker 1: I think a positive life change is getting a promotion
Speaker 1: or a raise, or you marry somebody that you love.
Speaker 1: That's a positive. Losing your job and moving out of
Speaker 1: a town that you love is a negative life change.
Speaker 1: I would only say it kind of goes back to
Speaker 1: my thaying no hill goes up forever. So there's been
Speaker 1: a lot of shit happening in your life, and not
Speaker 1: all of it has been good, you know, leaving the
Speaker 1: town that you love and breaking up and whatever. But
Speaker 1: I think that things will be better. I think you
Speaker 1: always have to look forward to things get being better
Speaker 1: because eventually they will get better. But I want to
Speaker 1: turn it over to you, the two of you and
Speaker 1: Bailey and find out how do you cope when you
Speaker 1: have a lot of life change your stories from a
Speaker 1: big life change.
Speaker 3: For me, I would say that I try to keep
Speaker 3: myself very busy because once you start like making yourself busy,
Speaker 3: your mind at least gets off of any kind of
Speaker 3: stressor is that you you could be sitting at home
Speaker 3: thinking about because like I know people who have gone
Speaker 3: through really rough breakups and like I have two where
Speaker 3: you just like lay in bed, but then all you're
Speaker 3: doing is literally thinking about that. Whereas like at least
Speaker 3: if you get out on a walk or something, you
Speaker 3: might get your mind off of it for a couple minutes.
Speaker 2: It's probably not going to happen.
Speaker 3: You're probably still going to be thinking about it, but
Speaker 3: it's going to help you out a little bit more.
Speaker 2: And yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 3: Like when I've gone through really hard things, I usually
Speaker 3: was working like three jobs and just kept like trucking
Speaker 3: through life and stayed really busy, and it really did
Speaker 3: help me out.
Speaker 1: That's really good advice, Jinny. I remember I was going
Speaker 1: through some awful dark shit about ten years ago, and
Speaker 1: I thought about it all the time, all the time,
Speaker 1: all the time. But I went out to doing a
Speaker 1: p and sid a haunted house somewhere up north, like
Speaker 1: in Wyoming, And I walked back to my car and
Speaker 1: I thought, God, for the last three hours, I did
Speaker 1: not think about it even once because I was busy.
Speaker 1: So I think that that's some really good advice. Stay busy,
Speaker 1: preoccupied with other positive things.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 5: I also so my last year was actually one that
Speaker 5: had a lot of changes. I ended a really long relationship,
Speaker 5: my best friend broke up with me. My job was
Speaker 5: really hard, and then I got this job, and so
Speaker 5: it's like good things bad things is very like roller Coastery,
Speaker 5: but like, in addition to staying busy, I kept a
Speaker 5: list of like blessings essentially, so like, yes, I lost
Speaker 5: out on my best friend of all time, but then
Speaker 5: I started taking notes about like the friends in my
Speaker 5: life who had really shown up for me, like since
Speaker 5: her departure from my life, and all of the time
Speaker 5: that I would have spent with her. How I started
Speaker 5: using that time and then I just started keeping notes
Speaker 5: of that where I'm like, Okay, now I've grown really
Speaker 5: close to this person and this person, and I've been
Speaker 5: my speech team is really like filling up my time
Speaker 5: and my energy. So that I'm not, you know, laying
Speaker 5: in bed and ruminating about it. But I just keep
Speaker 5: a list of things that I'm thankful for.
Speaker 1: That's a really good thing. I tried the positive journal,
Speaker 1: but every day was the same positive you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, like your daily positivity journal. And I'm like, well,
Speaker 1: I'm healthy and I got a great family and a
Speaker 1: great job. Next day, what are you thankful for today? Well,
Speaker 1: I'm healthy, got a great family, you get a great job,
Speaker 1: you get me.
Speaker 5: More specific like little bitty things like oh, I'm happy
Speaker 5: that I don't know the I can hear the breeze
Speaker 5: and the leaves today and that's like the best part
Speaker 5: of late spring eating blueberries.
Speaker 3: Andrew'll be like, how lucky are we that we get
Speaker 3: to eat blueberries. Andrew's a very grateful human. He lives
Speaker 3: pretty simple life of like happiness, and like, I don't
Speaker 3: know he it's just those little things that he'll bring
Speaker 3: up sometimes, you.
Speaker 1: Know, you think about it, and how lucky are we
Speaker 1: that we get to eat blueberries? They didn't grow around here.
Speaker 1: When somebody trucks him in from no Abilene, I think
Speaker 1: they grow an ample.
Speaker 5: Yeah, And I just get to sit here, look at
Speaker 5: you two, we do this little podcast and I just think, Wow,
Speaker 5: what a blessing.
Speaker 1: You know, what kind of is really? Seriously? All right?
Speaker 1: Next one, do not say my name. I do not
Speaker 1: want to be associated with the story that I am
Speaker 1: bringing up for discussion. Laugh emoji. First time writer, longtime listener.
Speaker 1: I told the story to a friend who said, you
Speaker 1: got to send it into the Dave Ryan Show. Last week,
Speaker 1: my neighbor had a story to share of something that
Speaker 1: happened in our typical, quiet, family friendly neighborhood. My neighbor
Speaker 1: started that at seven fifty in the morning, he was
Speaker 1: inside his house looking out toward the street and saw
Speaker 1: a naked man walking down the street. Masturbator.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, I'm really hoping it was just going to be
Speaker 2: a naked math.
Speaker 1: Nope, nope, nope, plain a day, Like what the fuck?
Speaker 1: My neighbor, being a taller, stronger guy, went out of
Speaker 1: the house, grabbed an iron rod from his truck, and
Speaker 1: confronted them. My neighbor also called the police in the
Speaker 1: process and asked and the naked man was arrested. My
Speaker 1: neighbor had video proof of said story and it was
Speaker 1: all captured on his ring camera. My discussion topic for
Speaker 1: you is. Have you ever had an encounter like this
Speaker 1: or had a ring camera capture something funny, embarrassing or shocking.
Speaker 1: I have no idea where this naked man walked in
Speaker 1: from or why, but seriously, dude, what the fuck? Sincerely,
Speaker 1: just an all right kind of dart liquor anonymous P
Speaker 1: one listener. I love that. Thank you. No, I caught
Speaker 1: a bear on my ring camera one time, and that's
Speaker 1: all I got. I got a bearing carade, No Colorado.
Speaker 1: I might have showed you a year or so ago. Yeah, No,
Speaker 1: nothing like that. I've always wondered what I would do
Speaker 1: if I was in McDonald's and somebody did one of
Speaker 1: those things where they jumped across the counter and started
Speaker 1: beating up on the cap. I always thought, because people go,
Speaker 1: I can't believe people are standing around recording this on
Speaker 1: their phone instead of breaking up the fight. I would
Speaker 1: neverver get because I'm not a big person. Yeah, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to get in the middle of it and
Speaker 1: then get charged with assault or be like, oh god,
Speaker 1: you pulled that woman off that other woman, you were
Speaker 1: abusive to that woman. I'd be like, no, I'm not
Speaker 1: I've never seen anything like that. If I do. I
Speaker 1: will record it, Jenny. I mean, have you seen anything weird?
Speaker 1: Gotten involved? Intervened?
Speaker 3: H The only thing I can think of was on
Speaker 3: a flight a few years ago Andrew got sat next
Speaker 3: to some guy who, like, I don't know if there
Speaker 3: was something mentally wrong with him, but he was just
Speaker 3: like talking to Andrew a bunch. He kept laying his
Speaker 3: head on and I remember that it was really really strange.
Speaker 3: And then like midway through the flight, he started like
Speaker 3: just causing commotion. And I was in the middle seat
Speaker 3: across the aisle from him, so I like started getting
Speaker 3: like protective of Andrew because Andrew was like not doing
Speaker 3: anything about it, and I go, hey, are you okay?
Speaker 3: And I'm like reaching out. And then finally the girl
Speaker 3: on Andrew's other side hit the buzzer to get a
Speaker 3: flight attendant and was like, hey, I think he really
Speaker 3: needs to move, like to Andrew. And then that kid
Speaker 3: wouldn't get up. He literally wouldn't get up to let
Speaker 3: Andrew out. God, it was just a very strange thing.
Speaker 3: But I started recording it because I just like, when
Speaker 3: you're on a flight and you don't really have an
Speaker 3: escape plan, I was getting really stressed about the situation, like,
Speaker 3: what is this guy gonna do? Is he gonna like
Speaker 3: pull out some kind of weapon, you know? So I
Speaker 3: did start recording that, but Andrew just kind of tried
Speaker 3: to ignore him. I would have immediately been like, let
Speaker 3: me move if that person, if he would have done
Speaker 3: that to me. And I will say that I heard
Speaker 3: him on the phone as the flight land ended and
Speaker 3: he was talking very normally, So I don't know if
Speaker 3: there was something wrong with him.
Speaker 5: Or not interesting, but it was strange. Yeah, nothing that
Speaker 5: strange to have happened to me. But my dad has
Speaker 5: a ring camera and he died. He caught the mailman.
Speaker 5: So my dad has like a couple of steps up
Speaker 5: to his front door, and you have to just like
Speaker 5: walk along, put the mail in, turn around, walk back,
Speaker 5: walk down the steps, and then go back around this
Speaker 5: little like fence kind of front porchy thing. And the
Speaker 5: guy the mailman, tried to jump the little front porchy
Speaker 5: thing got his whatst oh, Dave, I'll show you the
Speaker 5: video because you feel bad. You're like, oh, he fell,
Speaker 5: But it's so funny because he was so confidently hopped
Speaker 5: over this little fence and just fell back down and
Speaker 5: just stared at the sky for a second. He was
Speaker 5: okay though, yeah he was fine. I mean he got
Speaker 5: up and everything, but he was just like, I regret
Speaker 5: the decision that I made. I laughed so hard at
Speaker 5: that video. I've watched a million times since. Oh good times.
Speaker 1: Now, you know, I've never seen anybody walking naked masturbating
Speaker 1: down the street. I'm only going to point out you
Speaker 1: spelled masturbating wrong. Is the m A S t U
Speaker 1: r B A t I G not m A S
Speaker 1: t E r B A t I n G masturbating
Speaker 1: not masterbating a.
Speaker 2: Lot, Dave? Yeah, yeah, you search in for.
Speaker 1: Well back to my journaling.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, all right, we can move on.
Speaker 1: Spent the day mass tour basing.
Speaker 5: Okay, can I name the the title of that or
Speaker 5: no masturbating, Yes, spend the day masturbating.
Speaker 1: Spent the day master robating with a you yes, my
Speaker 1: dearest morning show gang. And this is why we love
Speaker 1: the Minnesota Goodbye, because we don't really kind of talk
Speaker 1: about this stuff on the regular show because you know
Speaker 1: what we I think one of the reasons we get
Speaker 1: a little bit spicy on the show, of course, with
Speaker 1: War of the Roses and Jenny will talk about you know,
Speaker 1: pooping or that type of thing, or we'll talk about
Speaker 1: or cousin Enel because we love the joke with cousin
Speaker 1: Enel because it sounds just like anal. So this morning
Speaker 1: we made a joke about vasileene and how my cousin
Speaker 1: Enel really enjoys vasileine. And then Jenny said.
Speaker 3: I said that, honestly, when I met cousin Enel, he
Speaker 3: didn't like vasiline back then, so I didn't like him.
Speaker 1: What did you do? Just spit on his hand and
Speaker 1: then rub it hunt?
Speaker 3: All right, too far, nous, take it back a.
Speaker 1: Stad Sorry, sorry, all right. Last one, I want to
Speaker 1: take the time to discuss the beef my father in
Speaker 1: law has with mister David Ryan. I've always talked highly
Speaker 1: of how great Dave is and has been every time
Speaker 1: we and my children have met him. But to come
Speaker 1: to find out that a long time ago, mister Dave
Speaker 1: Ryan was doing a bit on the radio where he
Speaker 1: asked people to call in with their best Rocky and
Speaker 1: Bullwinkle impressions. Okay, great bit. My father in law called
Speaker 1: with his actually really good impression of Bullwinkle. Mister Dave
Speaker 1: Ryan then proceeded to rip my father in law to Shred,
Speaker 1: stating it was the worst impression he has heard and
Speaker 1: it sounded nothing like it. So now, David, I need
Speaker 1: to hear you say the following, I'm sorry, Tim, your
Speaker 1: impression is good. I was mistaken, lol, just so I
Speaker 1: can record it and send it to him while he
Speaker 1: is still a good sport about you, since his grandson
Speaker 1: loves your children's book. I just thought you would like
Speaker 1: to know. I don't remember that bit at all. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna guess it was probably even back in the nineties,
Speaker 1: probably during the Patty Birch Lee All's MC days of
Speaker 1: the show, and I think I had a different tone
Speaker 1: that I thought it was funnier to rip people on
Speaker 1: the show. I remember one time somebody called in and
Speaker 1: her name was god, what was it, Myrtle or something
Speaker 1: like that, and I said Myrtle, and I played a
Speaker 1: canned laughter of like like laughing at this woman's name, Myrtle,
Speaker 1: and I thought it was funny, and then a friend
Speaker 1: of mine pointed out, they said, you know what, that
Speaker 1: was kind of not cool because it's the woman's name,
Speaker 1: and she realizes it's a silly name, but you know,
Speaker 1: to like put her on the radio and ask her
Speaker 1: her name and then laugh at her name, Myrtle. It's
Speaker 1: just and And I think there was a part of
Speaker 1: me when I was younger that used to think that
Speaker 1: kind of shit was kind of funny. I don't now.
Speaker 1: Like when somebody calls up now and they tell a
Speaker 1: really long, convoluted story, I never ever say, God, you're
Speaker 1: the worst storyteller ever. I turned their button off. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so it sounds like they stopped talking, and then I
Speaker 1: kind of try to say, hey, thanks a lot, that
Speaker 1: was really good. Yeah, I'm embarrassed. Anybody.
Speaker 5: Can I tell you a quick story about a time
Speaker 5: that you said something on the air you and Fallin
Speaker 5: that hurt my feelings. Yeah, this was probably right when
Speaker 5: Fallon started, and you were both making fun of women
Speaker 5: who had like one long hair like around their nipple,
Speaker 5: and I was like, but I have one long hair
Speaker 5: by my nipple, and I know a lot of people
Speaker 5: do and have to pluck it out, and I think
Speaker 5: of that every time I have to pluck that dang
Speaker 5: hair out of my nipple.
Speaker 3: Also, how times have changed, because Alim, I definitely talk
Speaker 3: about having nipple hair, we have to pluck it. So
Speaker 3: back then maybe she didn't have any app but she
Speaker 3: openly talks about that.
Speaker 5: I just remember that like clear as day, because I
Speaker 5: think about it every time I have to pluck that
Speaker 5: freaking hair off my nipple.
Speaker 1: Can I tell you about the first time I saw boobs?
Speaker 4: Sure?
Speaker 1: Tell me the reason. I was nineteen, my girlfriend was eighteen, okay,
Speaker 1: and I'd never seen I probably glimpsed my sisters or
Speaker 1: my mom's by accident there there, but to be intimately
Speaker 1: involved with the boobs. I was very disappointed that this girl,
Speaker 1: who was only eighteen, had veiny boobs, and she had
Speaker 1: a lot of veins in her Boobs're skinny?
Speaker 2: Are they big boobs?
Speaker 1: They were big ish? Yeah, And I was very disappointed.
Speaker 1: I was, like, I mean, not very disappointed, maybe more surprised.
Speaker 1: I was very happy to be.
Speaker 2: You know, in the presence, in.
Speaker 1: The presence of her boobs, but I was very surprised.
Speaker 1: I guess you could say, I didn't notice any nipple hair,
Speaker 1: but veiny boobs. And some people can live at me
Speaker 1: and like live they can be forty eight years old
Speaker 1: and not have any veins in their boobs. And this
Speaker 1: woman was eighteen, and she had veins in her boobs. Yeah,
Speaker 1: shout out Vanessa.
Speaker 4: Did you touch them? Did they feel like sand bags
Speaker 4: or something?
Speaker 1: Well, because I know what boobs feel like, they feel
Speaker 1: like big bags of.
Speaker 4: Sand, bags of sand.
Speaker 1: Yeah. Cool. Now that's a line from forty year old
Speaker 1: virgin because he doesn't know what boobs feel like. So
Speaker 1: somebody asked him and he lies and he says, they
Speaker 1: feel like big bags of sand.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that part.
Speaker 1: They feel like a water balloon.
Speaker 3: Kind of like if I hold my own boobs, it's
Speaker 3: a little different because they're like hard in.
Speaker 2: The middle, you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Really, no, like what part?
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like it's not just all like fat sitting on
Speaker 2: your chest.
Speaker 4: Mine feels like fat sitting on my chest.
Speaker 2: Like a water in the middle.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's like a water balloon where the balloon itself
Speaker 5: is like really thick feeling balloon, like a thick latex.
Speaker 1: So so the outer skin is thick latex.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, that's what feels.
Speaker 1: Sr one of what boobs feel like.
Speaker 3: I asked my mom when I was a kid what
Speaker 3: it feels like to have boobs, and she goes, well,
Speaker 3: you have a butt, don't you want to go? Yeah,
Speaker 3: She's like, it feels the same as having a butt,
Speaker 3: and I was like, oh, okay, that's true. I was
Speaker 3: like a little bit more fun than that.
Speaker 1: It's like, yeah, okay, let's move on to the next
Speaker 1: part of this. The same emailer, she says, while everybody's
Speaker 1: talking about the annoying Chumba Casino ads, why is nobody
Speaker 1: talking about the Benjamin Franklin ones. Oh my gosh, I
Speaker 1: literally have to turn off or go to another race
Speaker 1: at radio station every time I hear the unclog It
Speaker 1: is the worst impression ever. It makes me cringe every
Speaker 1: time I hear them. Uugh. I have an answer for
Speaker 1: that one. There is an absolute deliberate tendency to make
Speaker 1: those commercials memorable by making them moderately annoying. Sure they
Speaker 1: know exactly what they're doing, like, Brad, you need to
Speaker 1: call the Uncloggnator. Yes, I am the Unclaggnada. They deliberately
Speaker 1: make them annoying because they just say, hey, Northern Benfranklin
Speaker 1: dot com has a Google rating of four point nine
Speaker 1: and they can come and unclog your drains twenty four
Speaker 1: to seven snooze. So they do it very deliberately. And
Speaker 1: I learned that when I was back in college. There
Speaker 1: was a local clothing store called Gurmers in Colorado Springs
Speaker 1: and they were legendary because their commercials were the worst
Speaker 1: shit ever. There was these two young owners, probably twenty
Speaker 1: eight years old each, and they would yell at the
Speaker 1: camera and they would say stupid things. They would do
Speaker 1: it in one take, and people would say, I Girmers commercials. God,
Speaker 1: they're the fucking worst. But Girmers did great. Yeah, because
Speaker 1: everybody knew. So I think what we need to do
Speaker 1: is be more annoying, yes, so people will.
Speaker 5: Remember us, kind of like that lady that has that
Speaker 5: golf club or yeah, the golf lady in Florida that
Speaker 5: goes spidding.
Speaker 4: She's so bad, but you remember, I.
Speaker 2: Think she's good. Oh does she? She does she?
Speaker 4: I don't think it's a bit.
Speaker 3: I think that she like thinks what she's doing is
Speaker 3: good marketing, huh.
Speaker 5: I like the Northern Ben Franklin. I find their commercials
Speaker 5: comforting because they're bad, Like they just seem like Minnesotans,
Speaker 5: you know.
Speaker 1: I like them, you know, I get that, and they're
Speaker 1: definitely like they're trying to be Minnesotans. There is a
Speaker 1: woman and I can't find her right now. But she
Speaker 1: was I think on my radar a couple of weeks ago. Yes,
Speaker 1: And she's a woman who is attractive, probably fifty ish
Speaker 1: fifty five is years old, and she's like, she does
Speaker 1: the social media for this golf resort and she's so
Speaker 1: so bad, but people will go on there and praise her,
Speaker 1: and people are so nice. They never say you suck.
Speaker 1: Do you realize how bad you suck? But she's like, Hi,
Speaker 1: it's Diane from the golf resort. We're having a taco
Speaker 1: bar Tuesday night, and it's time for a twirl and
Speaker 1: she's wearing a pretty sexy dress. And you can tell
Speaker 1: that this woman knows that back in the twenties she
Speaker 1: used to be hot. Back in the nineteen twenties, during
Speaker 1: World War Two, she used to be hot. And so
Speaker 1: she will still add but you get it, yeah, you
Speaker 1: and I get it and watch it and we go
Speaker 1: it's not because she's graceful or talented, no.
Speaker 4: But it's because it's cringey.
Speaker 3: But I also think it's because she's genuinely happy in it,
Speaker 3: like it's like it's just her personality. So I think
Speaker 3: people are cheering her on because they're like, this is
Speaker 3: an attitude everyone should have.
Speaker 1: No, I think you're right, and people are really nice
Speaker 1: because nobody goes on there and says you suck you
Speaker 1: jackassd what the hell are you doing? But she really
Speaker 1: genuinely thinks that she's doing a good job.
Speaker 4: So, speaking of taco bar, and one of you guys
Speaker 4: fart something smells spice.
Speaker 1: Would never fart in the studio the studio, any must be.
Speaker 5: Something smells weird anyway, carry out? Okay, all right, I
Speaker 5: wanted to point that out in case one of you
Speaker 5: had farted, it would now.
Speaker 1: We wouldn't admit it anyway. Oh well, but no, I
Speaker 1: don't fart in the studio. I've got a personal policy.
Speaker 3: So you did fart, you just said you did. You
Speaker 3: wouldn't admit it. So you're the one who parted.
Speaker 5: Something smells like cheesy, cheesy spice spicy cheese.
Speaker 2: Well it's probably because you just ate thatch.
Speaker 4: That was like an hour I know.
Speaker 2: But isn't the wrapper in the garbage?
Speaker 4: How is that wafting all the way over here?
Speaker 2: I just got it, Like, are you pregnant?
Speaker 1: Nont Anyway, She goes on to say, key about the
Speaker 1: great work. I wass look forward to listen to one
Speaker 1: of my favorite podcasts while I drive around the city
Speaker 1: for work. Your p one listener, Jenny. I really enjoyed
Speaker 1: the emails today on the Minnesota. I thank you. I
Speaker 1: love the way you mix it up and talk about
Speaker 1: everything from bad Bullwinkle impressions to cheesy fart smells. So
Speaker 1: that was that was Paley. Yeah, appreciate that. Send your
Speaker 1: emails into Ryan Show at KDWB dot com. We'll see
Speaker 1: you next time here on the Minnesota. Goodbye.