Speaker 1: So you're a successful YouTuber, and you're a nice young woman,
and you're an intelligent young woman, and so one day
you confess to something that you felt you had to do,
something that's done every day in America, and then all
of a sudden, everything changes and you are under attack
from people who used to be your friends. And I
want to talk with that Nicki Philippi, who's a new
friend of mine through her dad, Dirk, and we will
maybe even ask Dirk to come on set and take
a bow. He's a very gifted speaker himself and musician.
So we'll talk with Nicky about this. And this is
with the help of Boer Capital Management, Know Your Risk
Radio dot com, and of course, with God Almighty.
Speaker 2: The Todd Herman Show is one hundred percent disapproved by
big pharma technocrats and tyrants everywhere. Now from the high
mountains of Free America. Here's the Emerald City exile God
her Man.
Speaker 1: Today is a day the Lord has made, and these
are the times to which God has decided we should live.
And I'm joined it in studio by Nicki Phillipie. I
do shake hands if I guess if that's.
Speaker 3: Okay, Well, my hand's all sweaty, but there we go.
Speaker 1: Just keep you pro welcome. You had an incredible experience
that most people will never know. Is first of all,
you became a genuine, for real YouTube star.
Speaker 3: I became a genuine, for real YouTuber. Yeah. I've been
doing it for fourteen years at this point, and it,
I mean, it changed my life. It changed my family's lives.
I've loved it the whole time, but the last few
years have been crazy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, which, yeah, we'll talk about.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So I don't want to embarrass you, but your dad
knows I said this. You remember this. The first time
I met you was at a speech I gave in
Corley and Idaho, and you came up and introduce yourself,
your dad. You guys were you? We are the same church.
Do you remember the first thing I said to you?
Speaker 3: I mean I didn't, but he shook my memory that
you asked me like if I worked in entertainment?
Speaker 2: Thing?
Speaker 1: Yeah, it was, yeah, what do you do in entertainment?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Right, And it was how you presented yourself and poise,
et cetera. And I've seen your dad speak, and maybe
this is something that he's passed on to you. But
talk about the process of getting into YouTube, how that happened,
and then we'll get into this. The only thing I
can describe it as an attack.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, So first off, I'm really bad at like
summarizing things. I'm going to try really hard, but I'm
a YouTuber, so I tend to just like glaborate on
and on and on, and then when it's like focus
on just the important parts, it's like I don't know
which part's important. It kind of all feels important. But yeah,
I had. I started off doing more like traditional entertainment
stuff in LA. I was working like indie films, commercials,
lots of theme park stuff. The irony is, I don't
know if I told you this when we talked last time.
I think I did, but I'm not sure. When I
used to drive to like my shows or being on
set or whatever, I would listen to KFI AM six
forty and so I would frequently listen to Rush Limboss.
I'm pretty confident that I had heard you back in
the day at some point, because I listened every single
I'm sure. So it's very kind of ironic, very full
circle being here hanging out with you. But that's what
I was doing first and I had worked a job
in Singapore with a theme park, came home because I
had an injury. And when I came back, I was like,
what am I going to do with my life? Like
I can't dance anymore, I'm not really that great of
an actress, Like I don't not a great singer. I
don't know, And long story short, I ended up uploading
to YouTube. It took me about six months. I kept uploading,
taking down, uploading, taking down, feeling so embarrassed, and then
I ended up uploading and just keeping it up and
deciding not to tell anyone. I'm still gonna say anything.
We'll see if anybody other than my parents watches my videos.
Kept it up and kind of slowly over the next
year or two, built my audience from there. Because I
was in LA, I started meeting a bunch of other
LA YouTubers, which this I mean fast forward. I think
this is a big part of the reason why our
whole cancelation became what it was is because from the
beginning I was very plugged in with like the LA
YouTube comunity, and I was lucky enough to be brought
in and me all of these super talented people, a
lot of them were not believers. We didn't share the
same worldview, but that wasn't necessarily a problem for me.
We bonded on a lot of the other creative things,
you know, yeah, just like making content, and that's also
a very different, like it's a different thing being a creator.
So there's even a bond in that too, like we
know what we've been through, you know what I mean. So, yeah,
I just kept making videos over the next decade. I'm
really trying to shorten here, because I could really go
off into fourteen different directions. I started off basically making
like beauty content. It's actually really funny. I'll back up
the very first video I uploaded onto YouTube. I was
so embarrassed that I opened it by being like, hey, guys,
welcome back to my channel. Long time no see. Even
that was my very first video on YouTube. I was
just I was so humiliated, and I just kind of
kept going. And so my channel really started off as
like beauty lifestyle type stuff. The irony in that is
not only did my mom say from the beginning, like
like okay, yeah, you like the beauty thing. I kind
of just liked it because of my background and entertainment,
like having to get ready to go on stage on camera,
but it's not like that was a passion of mine.
And she's like, how much can you really talk about?
Like what are you gonna run out of things to
talk about? I was like, ah no, I'll just keep going,
you know. And I had a good friend of mine
at the time who actually just texted me the other
day and was like telling me she was proud of me.
But she was like, why don't you talk more about
like political, social historical stuff. And I'm not saying this
is true, I'm just quoting her. She was like, you're
one of the most educated people I know on the topic,
like this is what you love. And I'm like, no,
that's not what I'm doing, which that also kind of
ties into once we fast forward to all the cancelation stuff.
But yeah, I just kind of kept doing beauty lifestyle
stuff because my background was dancing and singing in musical
theater as well. I was blessed enough in my journey
to be able to make a lot of really cool music.
I'm not one of those YouTubers that felt like above
doing covers, like doing covers, I think other people have
made a lot of really great music and I got
connected with some really talented musicians and producers in LA
that did a really great job at what would be
the word not re engineering, rearranging music in a way
that we would take like these songs that I liked,
and then we would make them kind of our own.
So I put out a lot of really cool songs.
My dad actually played on one of them. We did
John Mayer in the Blood and it was really cool.
And yeah, I was just kind of doing my thing
over the years. I feel like that's probably the broadest
picture I could give of the journey without getting too
far into details.
Speaker 1: So I've become a fan of your work, and that's
not a phrase I use a lot because it means fanatic.
So I appreciate your work. And one of the things
you're very clever at doing is sort of I would
describe as a soft open. You're very skilled at talking
with people, being conversational. That's hard when you are talking
to a camera to provide the illusion that you're talking
with people. Now through the years, and maybe you're the
same way you feel an audience because you get to
know them through comments and occasionally meet them at live events.
I've noticed that about you and then came this time
where you had to confess to something. And we do
this like sometimes my wife will say to me, I
learned things about you and your show. I didn't know
that happened to you, or I didn't know you felt
that way. So I want to talk about the moment
of the cancelation, how that happens, and then this discovery
of well wait a minute, So this topic is the
thing that makes me verbot and we'll talk about this
with Nikki Philippi. I'm having this morning. This would be
oh gosh, let's see twelfth twenty four. This is my
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NICKI Philippi's with me. So you have been running in
the circles of entertainment, and I've run in tho circles,
not like you, but a little bit. I used to
have a Microsoft check book down in Los Angeles. So
I was super popular because I had fifty million dollars.
Speaker 3: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Right, So I got invited to all the white parties,
to the parties, all the little white lines and all
the beautiful mirrors and seen some of that stuff.
Speaker 3: Which, by the way, I'm excited to interview you on
my podcast as well because I can't wait to hear
all of your stuff in more detail hopefully.
Speaker 1: So yeah, no, you'll get all the details you want.
You go, you get in front of the camera, and
you talked about a heartbreaking decision you had to make.
Speaker 3: Yeah. So, our dog, Bowser, we had him for he
was about ten and a half years old, and he
had shown aggression before, we had worked with a trainer
in the past. He was just I mean, he was
kind of an out of control dog in a lot
of ways, and he had actually attempted to bite people
a couple of times. There were just a few different
things that had come up, and basically he bit our
son in the face. And when that happened, and it
happened in like a blink too, I mean, and you'll
have to forgive me. I get I get us even
rethinking it, not only just my stomach kind of shudders
when I think about how grateful I am that my
son was okay. Like all he was left with he
has like a little mark on his face and that's it.
And I'm sure everyone is seen, especially in the last
few years, which I don't think this is a coincidence,
how many stories have come out of kids being either
mauled to death or just having their face ripped off.
Like it literally makes me shudder when I think about
how grateful I am that my son was okay. But
he bit our son in the face, and after that
it was like, okay, stuff has happened. Multiple things have
led up to this. We need to rehome him. And
so we had reached out to an organization to talk
about rehoming him, and they basically walked us through the
fact that they're like, you cannot rehome this dog for
a lot of different reasons, not only like do bite
laws very state by state, but he had shown aggression
before he was elderly, essentially like that breed of dog.
He was in the chapter of his life where he
was nearing the end anyways, and so I mean, once again,
trying to not go off in too many details, it
was a hard phone call. It was really devastating. I've
been with my husband for sixteen years. That was one
of the few times I've ever seen him cry. Was
when they told us, like, you cannot rehome him. So
we had to put Bowser down and we did it
in our home with an anesthesiologist, if that's the term
for it. And afterwards I felt like I had to
tell the internet, mostly because a lot of my videos
over the years, you know, I do a variety of videos,
Like I said, I've done beauty and lifestyle and music
and this and that, and I've done a lot of logs,
and so my audience that had really watched faithfully had
seen from the very beginning when we first brought Bowser
into our home, and it couldn't just be like, oh,
Bowser's just non And I didn't want to lie, not
only because I don't lie, but also because honestly, this
is ironic. I thought, oh my gosh, if I changed
the story and then someone's going to do some digging
and then they're gonna find it, you know, it's gonna
blow up in this whole thing. The best thing to
do is to just tell the truth. And so we
filmed a video just basically telling everyone what had happened,
and after I put it up, we put up an
Instagram post, you know, to say like, hey, this is
what happened, a full video out of my YouTube channel,
and it was within minutes like the post went completely viral.
I actually ended up privating my Instagram about twenty four
hours later because the post had like thirty thousand comments
on it. It was insane, and we started getting death
threats immediately. I mean that night, I remember I was
getting texts and phone calls. The next morning when I
woke up, I had texts with pictures of my house
and my address, like we're coming for you. You think
you can hide, you can't. Like I had mentioned, I'd
become friends over the years with a lot of the
LA creator community, which, like I alluded to earlier, I
think that's a big reason this blew up, because a
handful of those creators, I don't know if they had
been waiting for me to like fall or what, or
maybe it really just in their worldview, this was the
last straw, but this is the thing that really like
set them off. So a lot of them made videos
about us, and from their worldview, which I've learned a
lot since that point that like, Okay, this whole animal
were thing is a thing that runs rampant and culture
it makes sense to me now could not have foreseen it. Then.
We were completely blindsided. Like there were a lot of
people that felt we did that for views, and I'm thinking, like, man,
I would take that back if I could. And in
some ways, not like not the situation, not the fact
that we put Bowser down, but just this idea of
like doing something for views. It's like it was horrible.
In a matter of two days, we had lost all
of our sponsorships. This happened in March, I believe, and
we had at that point sponsorships booked out through Christmas,
and all of them, one by one just kept pulling
because the mob, the online mob, which that's a whole
separate thing. I do think that the online mob is
representative of culture in some ways. On the other hand,
my dad and I have talked about this a lot.
I don't know how many of these online people are
actually people. I think that like if they paid people
to show up to protests back in the day, like,
how much easier is it for there to be bots
to stick on people who don't align with your agenda.
And if I had learned one thing over the previous
decade on YouTube was that I did not necessarily align
with the agenda of YouTube corporate and a lot of
these bigger corporate entities that were involved in YouTube. So yeah,
it just it exploded really fast. And when we first
posted it, actually my manager had called me up and
she was like, you need to take that down, like
you can honor his memory without saying what happened. And
first off, I was like, well, it's already up, like
the internet doesn't forget, which on a side note, people
always ask us why we still have this video up,
and that's the reason we still have it up. A
the internet doesn't forget. What am I going to do?
Take it? It didn't happen. But B I don't feel
like we have anything to be ashamed of. Like I
said to you, if we could go back, we've thought
about it in circles over and over and over. We
would have done the exact same thing. Would we have
necessarily told everyone. I don't know about that. You know,
I think that it was supposed to play out this way.
God's done a lot in my heart and in my
husband's heart through this. It's been painful, but I think
it's been necessary. But we wouldn't have changed, Like we
still would have put Bowser down at that point. But yeah,
she'd said that to me, I'm like, dude, I'm not
going to take this down, like we've already told everyone,
it's already loose. But we eventually we parted ways as well,
so everything. We had five employees at the time, we
had to let everyone go. It all changed in the
matter of like a week. It was really depressing. It
was really scary. I think I cried from like honestly
like four months, Like not to be dramatic, get it,
but I mean at that point, I had already put
in a decade of work into this. I had poured
my heart and soul into YouTube and worked really hard
alongside other people. And it was very hard for me
to wrap my brain around how doing something that I
actually thought and still think was right could get me
in so much trouble and change things so radically, Like
it kept feeling like not reality, Like I'm not going
to wake up. What the heck is this?
Speaker 1: There's an obvious comparison that people probably been making in
their minds in the podcast family, is that okay? If
you'd come on and hey, guys, you know, my husband
and I have been together for sixteen years, we actually
got pregnant. It's not a good time for us. Yeah, exactly,
So it made the really difficult decision have an abortion. Nothing,
you'd still have sponsors, et cetera. My daughter's a vegan,
so she'd hear your story and she'd be one of
those people who's outrage. I'll just tell you that, right.
Speaker 3: Which, to be honest, those are the only my husband
gets mad when I say this, but those are the
only people who'se anger. I kind of respect because I'm like, well,
at least you're morally consistent, right, you don't eat me.
But it's like if you eat burgers, like, I'm sorry,
I don't, you're missing the consistency here.
Speaker 1: Let me share with you just a quick story of
something happened to me because you speak of the mob,
and I met the mob. I've met the mob twice.
I mean I've met the like antifat types who've come
to my studio in Seattle with the intention of intimidating
me and then when they found out, wait, you actually
do carry guns. Yeah, I remember when I said that
on the show. But I'll tell you story about a lady,
a lady who wished a painful death upon my little girl,
who at the time was kindergarten. And I'll share this
with you in a second. We're talking with Niki Philippi.
There's a link to her podcast, YouTube, vlogs, et cetera.
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code Todd. So I'll make this brief because the interviews
about you, I just will share this. I met them up.
This lady when I was the chief digital strategy at
the RNC. She found my email dress sent me this
note and she said, oh, no, she did it on
social media. That's right, she did on social media. I
hope your daughter dies slowly of a really, really painful
disease like cancer, right kidding me? No, she said this.
I just she said this, and I used this too.
I can't remember the name of the two anymore. Where
it was this incredible database. You took someone's social media
handle and that would find all their email addresses. So
I learned that she owned the jewelry store in Maryland.
So that weekends, my wife and daughter and I drove
out and my wife stayed in the car. She didn't
want to see this lady, and my daughter and I
went in. My daughter was kindergarten blonde, blue eyed, very
friendly little girl. She loved the shop and she bought
some trinkets. I bought them for her, and the lady
was so kind. You're, oh, it's such a lovely girl,
and stands, oh so in need of your daddy to
buy this to you, and oh and honey, you go
into the car with mom, And I said, you know,
I'd love to be able to know when you have
specialists coming. Let me give you my business card.
Speaker 3: Oh so she didn't even recognize you by your face.
Speaker 1: No, she looked at my business card, taught herm in
chief Digital strategist Republican National Committee. You mm hmm, that's
the little girl you wish death upon.
Speaker 4: Wow.
Speaker 1: So why don't you come to the car with me?
And why don't you say it to her face? And
she just shook, I mean shoulders shook. She started to
cheer up. I am so sorry. I can't believe what
politics does to me. I said, well, but she's right here. Well,
i'll give your money back. No, no, wow, No, that's okay.
I don't want my money back. I bought that for
my daughter. But why wouldn't you go say this to her?
Because I don't believe it. I am so sorry. This
is a real wake up call for me. I said, well,
I'm glad, that's why I came. I didn't think you
mean it. I don't really think you meant it, but
you know they mean it at the time. Because I'm
making you cry.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, it's just it's just incredible to me that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, social media for many people, and I got addicted
to this, the dopamine rush of owning the libs on Twitter.
Oh you know what I'm saying, Oh yeah, boom boom boom,
And it's very ungodly. And so I was thinking about
about the people I've burned and the old days of
talk ready to get off my phone, you idiot. And
I guess it was my chance to experience that a
little bit, to experience that that anger. But I have
a theory about you, and.
Speaker 3: God, Oh, let's hear the theory.
Speaker 1: Well, let's hear first of all, how your approach to
doing your job has changed it all. If you've kind
of come back and started to make content again. And
I've left back and looked at some of your older work,
and I see that you are weaving in so well
to your content. A little topic on medical freedom here,
just a little bit here, mention and you know, and
you do it in a very wise and YouTube safe way.
But people know what you're saying, a little food freedom here,
and then even some mentions of your faith in Jesus,
just a little bit, and you do it well enough
that I think people can take this as bits and
pieces of something they'd want to look at later like, huh,
she has this faith, maybe I should. So how did
that change for you when you started to come back
into the world.
Speaker 3: Well, it's interesting because you know, how you see yourself
versus how other people see you as always just that
very interesting because I feel like I've always kind of
had that in the mix. Like I used to kind
of joke, it wasn't really a joke, like I want
to be like a vitamin wrapped in chocolate, like I
want to know. I want to have that. I want
to be like this this goodness out there, but it's
digestible whatever that means, which my view on that has
even kind of changed. That's probably, I guess. And the
answer to your question, the biggest thing that has changed
for me since going through all of this is realizing
that I can't control how other people feel about me.
So even if I want to be a vitamin wrapped
in chocolate, it's like someone might still think like I
taste gross. You know that. It's like not, I can't
control people's reactions.
Speaker 1: An everlasting gobstopper, though, so are gross.
Speaker 3: I've never tried it ever, looks in God songer. What Wait,
I don't think I've ever tried one though, Well.
Speaker 1: They're not real joke, Okay, don't tell the kids.
Speaker 3: Yeah that's so I'm not. I'm not that clued into yeah,
junk food stuff slash. I haven't watched Wally Wonka in
a minute, but got it out.
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, wait a minute, you're dead sitting her. Hey listen,
I think you're a great father. But that's that you.
Speaker 3: No, it's it's not. Okay, it's not because I can
watch movies over and over and I don't. My husband
gets mad at me because he's like, we just watched that.
I'm like, but I won't remember.
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's an advantage.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm paying attention to different things, but I forget.
I miss like main points, like the main candy in
the movie. Apparently. Yeah, I've just realized that, like I
can't control how people are gonna take things, so I
can try to be like as nice and as sweet
as I will. And it's not that I don't think
that that's not a worthwhile endeavor. You know, all these
books like my parents did have me read growing up,
you know, like how do one friends and influence people?
It's like I think those are worthwhile skills. But my
opinion has changed in the sense that, like, I don't
think that that guarantees you anything, and ultimately, especially in
the view of like the Gospel and how God's going
to work through you and through stuff. Sometimes it's just like, oh, well,
you just got to say it, Like you're gonna be
too concerned about like, oh, hurting people. It's like sometimes
you just got to say it. So it's funny because
I feel like I've become more emboldened since the cancelation
to just say things more upfront. Versus my past content.
It was more I feel like, just like little drips
here and there. Although I did have a channel called
Asniki that was an advice channel, and I was definitely
more bold on that channel. But I still I mean,
this is me being bold now. So if I'm still
soft maybe compared to for me, it's all very bold.
Speaker 1: Well, I think because of the time I spent initially
in talk radio and what it was and how the
meetium worked at that time, you know, bold was rewarded.
Maybe there's a gender difference. And I'm not really joking
about growing up redneck. I mean, one of our solutions
in junior high in high school was I'll meet you
at the church. That's where the fist fights occurred.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm a native Angelino.
Speaker 1: Okay, so you guys, did you did the drive by
shooting some stuff? Right, it's Nikki hanging out the door
with the oh.
Speaker 3: Like a suburban Angelina. Just mean like more of like
an atheistic society.
Speaker 1: Through paint balls.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, just just different than the redneck meet
you at church society.
Speaker 1: There's advantages to that. So I I had this experience
the where when I got to fill in for Rush
Limbaugh for the first time and I was working with
that guy who you can't see on camera, Alley see this,
that's Alex and I got this word, Hey, we're gonna
ask you a film for Rush, and I did it
and cool.
Speaker 3: You guys go back that far by the way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, long time. And the when the the I went
into the studio and I was listening to the parodies
of Rush because he had these parodies that would run
down the affiliates like you know, six hunder some stations
just to make sure that everyone's getting to feed. So
the radio stations catch catch on. Okay, we're getting the
EIB feed from New York and it was fine, and
then I realized, Oh my gosh, I'm about to go
on a program with the largest radio audience that, in
all reality will ever exist twenty five million people. I
mean not all at once, but you know, five ten
million persons every fifteen minutes. And I dropped to my
knees and prayed. And when I stood up and the
parodies ended, and then there was silence, and then the
beep of the satellites. All of a sudden, I was
grossly nervous.
Speaker 3: And dry mouths.
Speaker 1: And then when I heard boom boom boom boom, boom boom,
and I believed fully in my soul that someone was
going to walk in the door and go, oh, wait
a minute. We didn't understand you're the redneck guy. No, no,
we can't have this. This is a big mistake. We
thought you were someone else. But it occurred to me
later and Alex and I talked about this that I
said to you, do you remember this? I said, you know,
it's really weird. I prayed during Russia show, but not ours,
and you and I started to pray every morning before
the show. And Alex is a very stout, firm man
of God, and the show began to change, and I
found it very difficult to not speak God's word on
a consistent basis. And pastors weren't me about this. They said,
you're going to that you find it very hard to
speak about things other than God's word. So I have
this theory with you, and I want to share this
with you. On Thursday, my friend Zach Abraham did his
last free live webinar of the year, and he's the
chief investment officer Bulwark Capital Management. Some of the questions
were fascinating having to do with the Trump economy. Here's
some things that President Trump has said on the great side,
on the make America great side, freeing up the pipeline
projects in America, particularly some of the key ones that
have been blocked down, that will initially and immediately get
us back into being a net exporter of fuels, stopping
the ridiculous attempt to stop natural gas in the country.
Perhaps being the president who gets micro nuclear plants installed
around America. If that happens, it would be the biggest,
most fundamental positive shift in our economy in hundreds of years.
He's the guy that could get this done. If you're
a buy and hold situation during the eighty twenty stock
bond mix. How do you take advantage of that? I mean,
if you're buying hold you might see an increase in
the stock market from that. But what if you could
pick specific companies and take action on them. Hundreds of
companies at a time are thousands. This is much more
like Bulwark Capital Management's approach, which is predicated upon risk management,
paying attention to world events and hedges upon hedges. Last week,
Jack provided this example. There's a company that's in the
gold business, and Zach was raised around gold mines and
their stock, he said, was operating somewhere around some really
small amount, like thirty cents, and it's just up and notice.
But the fundamentals of the company are fantastic. The cashful
is fantastic. The CEO is buying their stock. If you
took the assets they own, Hey, this is their land,
this is their minds, this is the equipment. This is
the gold that's been or silver I think it is.
It's actually silver gold silver that's confirmed to be in
the ground. It would come out at about a twenty
three dollars share price. This thing is trading at thirty
cents now, Zach made clear look there's some debt, there's
some structured and unstructured debt on the books, But twenty
three dollars for a thirty cent purchase. That's what hedging
is about. That's risk management. Eventually math will catch up
other investors will realize, oh my goodness, that sort of return.
You could go take a look at your portfolio with
Zach sit on a conference call. He'll look at your
retirement plan. He'll look at the money that you have
cash assets in otherwise land, you and your spouse can
talk with him about retirement, what you think it is
and what the math says. It can help you see
if your portfolio is being actively managed. She'll be able
to tell you that an active management of portfolio can
reduce risk and volatility. So just go get a free
conference call together with them. It's super super easy. Call
him at eight sixty six seven to seven nine RISKS
or go to Know your Risk radio dot com. You'll
put a time in a schedule. You guys can meet
face to face if you want to go fly and
see him in Seattle, or just do a video call.
It's eight sixty six seven seventy nine risk or go
to Know your Risk Radio dot.
Speaker 4: Com investment advisory services offered through Track Financial loc and
SEC Registered investment Advisor. The opinions expressed in this programmer
for general informational purposes only and are not intended to
provide specific advice or recommendations for any individual around any
specific security. Any references to performance of security, so it
thought to be materially accurate and actual performance may different.
Investments involve risk and are not guaranteed. Past performance doesn't
guarantee future results. Track twenty four to three zero eight.
Speaker 1: Here's my theory, okay, is I think you got to
see and feel persecution.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying that you're preaching the word of God
when you had to put bowser down. But God does
not call the equipped, so he equips the cold. And
I think you live in a time of persecution, and
I think your generation is going to face much more
of it than you would ever ever imagine. And the
Lord's had told us effectively, look they hated me first,
blessed are you when they persecute you in my name?
And you're uniquely able to use the platform you've been
given and the personality with which God gifted you to
begin speaking these things into a generation that they're chasing
after teachers that their itching years want to hear things.
You live in a world where pastors will say things
that simply are not in the Bible, and people don't
know fifteen percent of Americans have a biblical worldview, though
I think about sixty five percent of people call themselves Christians,
and I think it's something along the lines of seven
and a half percent of youth pastors have an actual
biblical worldview. That's creepy, right. So I have this theory
that you taste a little bit of persecution and you
live through it and you're still Nikki, and you still
have a family that loves you, and you still have
a husban who loves you. So that's my theory.
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm not going to disagree with that. I
think you know, when everything happened, which there was even
I mean there was even more that came after that,
it was kind of like a punch and then a
double punch because leading up to that time, before we
had our son. Should I even go off on.
Speaker 1: This, You go off on whatever you want. You're a professional.
Speaker 3: Sometimes I get a little parandle because, like I said,
I can go on for hours so it's like, I
don't know what I'm about to say.
Speaker 1: How I don't know what we need to do. We
took the brown end ms out of the dish. There,
we got your managements all fine with the limo and
every there.
Speaker 3: I don't get the brown Oh like diva comment, you.
Speaker 1: Don't get the van Halen thing.
Speaker 3: No, I think about it in terms of Jalo.
Speaker 1: Wait, you your dad was a successful studious You didn't
tell the van Halen stories.
Speaker 3: The van Halen story.
Speaker 1: Van Halen had a rider in their concert. Their concert
rider okay, said that they wanted bulls of Eminem's with
all the brown ems from it was just to be jerky.
Speaker 3: I did pick up on the vibe though, because while
I'm not saying this this is true, I've heard the
same thing of j Lo. So that's kind of what
I thought. Yeah, I know you're saying that's true or whatever,
but you know, picky about the foods or whatever, which
I'm picky about my foods too, it just wouldn't be
Eminem's anyways. Wow, back on focus. So after the Bowser situation,
part of the reason it was so prolonged was not
just that cancelation. And this is I guess kind of
along the lines of like the persecution and it really
feeling like it was targeted because of our faith. We
had been going on a journey for the previous like
two years prior to getting pregnant having my son, an
adoption journey. Essentially, I had thought for a long time
that I didn't want to have any biological children. This
is kind of it's fascinating to me because it's kind
of part of this whole thing as well. I think
it's kind of in the same subject vein. And the
reason I thought I didn't want to have biological children
was very layered. I dealt with chronic pain for a
long time, so that was part of it. I thought, man,
having a baby's going to like ravage my body, and
then part of it And I've actually referred to this
is probably like the biggest leftist life I fell for
because even though I was from I'm from LA I've
really kind of always been more conservative. Like I told you,
i'd be driving to like an event listening to KFI
like I've always been. I got married at twenty, you know,
I've always been more conservative, but at the time, the
kind of, like I said, the biggest leftist lie I
fell for was thinking, okay, well, over population, like there's
too many people on the planet, there's not enough resources,
and holding hands with well, what's the big deal about
my DNA? Why would I need to duplicate my own DNA?
Like if there's all these kids that need homes, that
need moms and dads, like, why would I need to
have any children? And now, to me, those are almost
you know, separate things. There obviously are orphans, kids that
need mom, moms and dads. Now, without going to conspiratorial
through our journey, our eyes were opened a lot to oh,
there is corruption in our opinion, not only within CPS
that we started kind of seeing that's almost a yeah,
separate topic, but we experienced that, but also when we
were looking at adopting internationally, we confronted or we saw
what we started to believe, like, okay, I think there
might be human trafficking going on here. And you know,
it wasn't so clear that we could get on the
internet and be like, hey, everyone, there's human trafficking happening here.
But stuff started presenting itself, and then we started reading
certain blog articles and encountering things that we were like
I think there might be trafficking going on here. Just
very weird. The whole idea of how many orphans there
actually were, the whole idea of how many kids actually
needed to be ripped out of their homes in the
States and replaced with new family it just all started
being a big, giant, confusing pot of questions. Honestly and basically,
after we had gone through this whole journey of like
looking at international adoption, looking at domestic private adoption, looking
at fostering with the possibility like fostering to adopt, we
ended up getting through the end of our journey with
this foster program, which was like it was a few
months long, full of like blood work and psychological interviews
and evaluations and letters written by family members. We had
received a call from the agency basically telling us that
if we weren't willing to change the age range that
we were willing to accept that they didn't have a
use for us. Now, on a side note, that was
a completely different story than what we had been told
the whole time through a journey. But I say all
that to say that was kind of the final thread
for me, and I was like, dude, am I sure
that I don't want to have babies, like I'm getting
to the point now where I'm starting to get older,
Are you sure, Nikki? So we ended up trying for
a child, got pregnant the first month. That decision was
made really fast. But after the cancelation happened with Bowser
about two months after that, everything reared up again. But
not in regards to Bowser. A clip from a video
that we had made when we were documenting our adoption
journey ended up going viral. They took about I think
it's like thirty seconds out of a video that was
over an hour long. Now, besides the fact that the
video was over an hour long, that one video was
part of a multi video series. As you can maybe
tell about me now from talking to me, sometimes I'm
honest to a fault. And when we were going through
looking at international adoption, we were looking at different countries.
You know, which country would be the right fit. Every
country has different requirements, different things that they allow or
don't allow, And one of the countries that we had
been looking at was Thailand, which, ironically enough, we had
actually been giving monetarily to a anti human trafficking program
in Thailand for almost a decade. My dad actually has
visited the home over there, and in the video we
had talked about like, hey, we started looking at Thailand
as an option, but now it looks like Thailand's not
going to work either. And basically what happened was when
we were going through all of the things that were
laid out, like the qualifications, one of the things on
the list was saying that the child cannot appear online
anywhere for a year or they will take them back,
or that you run the risk of them taking them back.
Now side note, I say this hesitantly. You decide whether
you want this in or not. That also smells to
me a little odd, a little bit like why wouldn't
you want the child on the internet for a year?
It is it because they're gonna look the same for
about a year, they're gonna be more recognizable. Like this
is weird to me. I'm not necessarily making that accusation,
but it smelled really weird.
Speaker 1: I never would have thought of that angle, but that's weird.
Speaker 3: Apparently a lot of people didn't. And the reason we
backed out though was not, oh man, we can't put
them in our vlogs, like this is our job for
a living, if there were layers of an onion, Yes,
we are online for a living. If they showed up
in the background or whatever, even that could be a
risk of them being taken back. Really, it was my
very level headed, my very level headed assistant who was like, Nikki,
you can't guarantee that like a full what if you're
at a birthday party? What if? And this used to
happen to me a lot back then. It doesn't happen
so much now, partially because I spend a lot of
my days at home with my newborn and being a milkmaker.
But back then, I would be out and about and
I would come home and I would open up Twitter
and someone has seen me out and taken a picture
of me, Like, oh, I saw you, but I didn't
want to say hi. I was too nervous. So that's
a picture that was taken. I mean, no big deal,
but like without my consent, I didn't okay this. And
so my assistant was like, dude, you can't. You can't
make that guarantee. You run the risk of taking a
child and then them being ripped apart from you again
because your lifestyle does not align with like the requirements
that this country has laid out. So we tried to
explain that I maybe over explained, which I might be
doing right now, but I explained that in the video,
they took a thirty second clip that made it basically
look like the reason we didn't adopt a child was
because we couldn't exploit them, quote unquote, and that blew
up into its own thing, like literally all over again.
Cover of Fox News, CNN, MSNBC. So it was two
basically two cancelations backed back within a two month period.
And so that's really, to my defense, why I cried
for four months, it's because it like it exploded, and
then we moved here actually shortly after, because when we
started getting so many death threats and had to file
police reports, my parents were like, what are you even
doing there? Like just move here now, and we moved here,
and then everything blew up again in regards to the adoption.
And it's crazy too, because the internet's like a bad
game of telephone. Like I still, I mean this last week,
I probably got this comment three to five times from
people saying like why should I listen to you the
girl who returned a handicapped child because she couldn't tell Oh,
she couldn't exploit them. I'm like, why we weren't even
in the program? What are you talking about?
Speaker 1: The things people quote know about it?
Speaker 2: Yus?
Speaker 1: It's crazy, right, there's some things that I still get
to this day. And I'll tell you about this in
a second. Nicki Philippi's with us. Mike Lindell was a
guy who sold pillows. He was a wacky guy who
sold pillows. He had pillows and all sorts of retail stores.
He'd worked up to My Pillow being in bed Beth
and beyond, as I recalled, these big stores and you
get a better price online, and you got to work
directly with Lindell at his company My Pillow. Then it
wasn't his support for Trump, it wasn't his support for
conservatism or the Lord Jesus. It was elections and that's
what made him persona on Groude, even on places like
Fox News, where he has now not really been able
to appear. So Mike keeps going. He's an energizer, Bunny,
this is a guy who's a former meth addict and
alcohol addict and a gambling addict. To talk to him
about that, But recently they did it again there's been
a pretty big setback for the company. There was a
big retail store that said, yeah, we're going to cancel,
just hitting up to Black Friday. We're just going to cancel.
It's hard to view this is anything other than a
get back at Mike Lindell. So Lindell does what he does,
is going to take this hit to his company and
offer it to us as our opportunity. Right now, you
can go to my Pillow dot com, slash todd and
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slash Todd. I was talking to you about meeting the
mob and about that experience and what you've met and
what you've been through. And let's say one more instance,
and then I want to ask you a question. Okay,
I was speaking at George Shown University and once again
they came after my daughter. So I was setting up
to speak and I had my desktop was showing on
the on the projector behind me, and there was a
picture of my daughter and this guy sitting in the
front row says and he's there early. He goes, that's
your daughter. Go yeah, yeah, So you give my speech
and afterwards he raised his hand. I said yeah, he goes, yeah.
I'm the guy who asked if that was your daughter earlier.
You know, I hope she dies of throat cancer, and
I hope there's nothing you can do for her. I
hope it's painful and it takes two or three years
and there's nothing you can do. And the place starts
to boo. I mean to the defense of these college students.
They start to boo. I said, no, no, let him talk.
He goes, well, you don't want other people to have
access to healthcare, so why should she? This is Obamacare?
Speaker 3: What in comparison?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: And I said, okay, well, she's here. She's in the room,
so she's seated up in the back row, So honey,
would you stand up? And people turned around and he
turned around and I said, yeah, I got you. She's
not really here because I wouldn't burn her in such
a place. You're threatening a little girl because you say
I don't want people have access to health care. I do.
I just don't think Obamacare will do that. I think
it will destroy access to health care. And if that
doesn't explain my position, I'm pretty sure if you're will
need to take off the contact Philip watch that your
parents give you as part of your trust fund. In
the three thousand dollars sweatsuit. I don't want it to
get dirty. You and I could go out back and
we could probably figure this out real quick. Well, I
was just saying, I say, yeah, I know you were
just saying, so meeting the mob, you met the mob,
But then Jesus met the mob. And I think about
our Savior and the things that were no doubt said
to him on the way to the cross, and save yourself.
You saved others, save yourself. Look at you now, King
of the Jews, and that thing he said just before
he died about his manors. Forgive them, father, they know
not what they do. How are you with forgiveness?
Speaker 3: Oh? I don't even know how to answer that question.
That's that was a much more profound question than I
expected you to ask. I mean, I want to say uh,
I want to say good like I'm not, you know,
but that at the same time, I know that I'm
a sinner, and I know that you know. My feelings
on the mob in general kind of change day to day.
I will say, within the last few months, more than
more than anger at people, I've felt a lot of
shame at times, and just embarrassment like I should have known,
like why Why did I share all of this? But
I feel like God's lifted a lot of that from
me recently, So I don't Yeah, I don't know. I
didn't expect you to ask that. I almost don't have
an answer.
Speaker 1: How does your heart feel?
Speaker 3: I mean depends on the day and the time.
Speaker 1: How does it feel right now?
Speaker 3: Well you asking me that, I guess it feels kind
of kind of sad. I go towards sadness more than anger,
you know. I don't you know when you said that,
like I have kind of a soft touch, I don't
tend to go towards like I don't tend to be
a fighter. I don't tend to go as much towards
like anger and rage. I tend to more like shut
down and kind of fall under the weight of people's
hate and anger.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 3: So when you've told me your stories of confronting the
mob and like how strong you've been, I'm like, man,
I want to be more like that because I kind
of tend to like melt under it.
Speaker 1: So wait, wait, you haven't melted.
Speaker 3: You're sitting right here, Thank you.
Speaker 1: You haven't melted, and you are strong in a different way.
Speaker 3: Well, I appreciate that.
Speaker 1: I don't know that it's that strong to threaten to
jack a guy up.
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, I mean you said that to me last
time too, And I was like, I'll take that. I
appreciate that. But yeah, I mean I don't I don't
sit and think about being angry at them all the time. Yeah, man,
I really don't even I feel like I'm at such
a loss for words. I don't even know what to say.
Speaker 1: But forgive. This is such a weird process. I was
talking to my daughter about this. You know, she suffered
some significant harm and we had a sermon at church
and it was about forgiveness, and she and I were
visiting about that afterwards, and she said, well, some people
just don't deserve it. I don't want to do that.
I don't want to call them and tell them. And
I said, oh wait, wait, wait, wait, you thought you
have to tell them? She said, I don't. No, no,
you tell Jesus. And let me ask you this, honey,
you forgiving them in confession to the Lord Jesus. What
does that do for them?
Speaker 2: She said?
Speaker 1: Nothing? Right, what does it do for you? And I
shared with her, he who extends mercy will receive it.
I'm not saying you're not a merciful person. I know
you to be, but that discovery to her that wait,
I'm not doing this for them, Know, you're doing this
because you love Jesus. I wonder what our world would
be like if we forgave the big things as easily
as sort of the little things. What was done to
you is not a little thing. It's a big thing.
But for instance, what if we forgive political enemies in
our heart every morning? How different would our day be
when we sit down to concern political news and in
advance say I forgive all these people for all the
evil that's being done through them. I mean, I don't
want to go too deep.
Speaker 3: But no, I mean you're making my wheels turn and
you're kind of making me think about the fact. This
is like a live on therapy or on screen therapy session. Okay,
you're making me think about the fact that like maybe
I've been sitting more in a place of like don't
be angry, like more neutrality type of thing, like let
it go. But I've I mean, yeah, you're making me
realize I've never I've never gone to the Lord in
prayer and like asked for him to give me a
feeling of forgiveness towards them, like help me to forgive them.
I've never done that. I think that's maybe why I
was caught off guard, because I've really just been trying
to sit in this camp of like, like I said,
more neutrality, like Okay, well, you know they're in the wrong,
Like I know my worldview, I know what I feel
like the Lord has called us to do. But yeah,
that's you're definitely giving me something to bring to God
in prayer. That's really good.
Speaker 1: Good. Yeah, I think we owe it to ourselves to
examine that, and I know that there's probably things I
should forgive to talk with this so close this off
for us, Like what what do you think God is
calling you to do? Specifically? I know you've been pregnant
this you might not have an answer. Maybe it's continuing
to do what you're doing. You live in the high
Mountains of Free American I.
Speaker 3: Love that you call it that, By the way, I think.
Speaker 1: That's kind of accurate, right.
Speaker 3: I think it's a radio show host thing to like
have a name for the area. I like the one
you've coined. I'm like, that's perfect.
Speaker 1: I know in a podcasting area're just supposed to start
talking with the people, but.
Speaker 3: I can't perfect.
Speaker 1: I love it, the little radio habits.
Speaker 3: I didn't mean that it's a slam. I like that
you named it.
Speaker 1: What do you think God is calling you to do? Professionally?
And I don't know that you separate that from being
don't call yourself a milkmaker. I got it.
Speaker 3: I know.
Speaker 1: I'm sure that women who have.
Speaker 3: To be It is one of my top jobs in
life right now. Which actually, you know, when I was
talking about the adoption thing, it's incredible because what that
the path that that led me down, I did not
expect in a million years. I did not realize that
that would lead me towards okay, yes, just you know,
having my own biological child. No, that led me on
the path towards this whole world of medical freedom, this
whole world of like, oh, in my opinion, I'm a
little bit radical when it comes to the birth thing.
My eyes, in my opinion, have been opened to the
fact that birth is something, and I realized there are emergencies.
This is not a shaming thing for women that have
had actual emergencies, And praise God for the hospitals when
there really are emergencies, but I think that it's something
that God made women to do that has completely been
twisted and altered and the whole experience has been I mean, dude,
I could go off on a whole thing about that.
And I did not expect that, like having my babies
at home. The minute I met them, it was such
a like almost one of my first thoughts was, this
is why they don't want people to have babies. Like,
even if I hadn't had that natural birth experience, I
think it's still the same thing. But I think that
all of it kind of builds together and holds hands
and it's like, wow, this natural birth experience in my environment,
in my home, grabbing my baby and holding them, it's like,
I mean, it's one of the closest feelings I've ever
had to God, because this person just comes out of
you and you're like what, they're looking at you, they're crying,
they're making noise, and you're like a brand new person,
Like what it's I mean, I have chills because it
was so soul altering and so yes, the milkmaker joke
is a joke, but that's a whole other thing. I
could go off on, like a rant about formula and
the lives that have been sold to women, about their
bodies not working properly, and what milk like the fact
that God made us to make that milk for our babies.
Immune systems are meant to be built a certain way,
and I think that making milk is part of that.
So I am kidding, and that I'm not kidding because
I do believe that is one of the top jobs
that God has for me right now, is establishing my
baby's lives through being a milkmaker.
Speaker 1: No, that's perfect. No, but the fake that these people
are making another run at breast milk is not healthy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, oh exactly. We're going to give you some unbelievable.
Speaker 1: And they did that early on. They did that to me.
My mom gave into that, I think because a pediatrician said, right,
and but the powder, the powder, missus Herman. I know
it's going to be so much, and I.
Speaker 3: Know you and I are on the same page in
regards to all of that. I've seen you talk enough
about this where he gets it. Yeah, oh bad, But
I didn't mean to not answer your question. To answer
your question, which is kind of still a non answer,
but it's a little bit of an answer. You know.
You had me start that book Experiencing God, and I'm
going through it slowly. It takes me a minute. I'm
also in another Bible study right now, but in I
think it was chapter one, he talks about really what
my answer is to you, which is that we don't
have to know the whole plan in order to move forward.
And what I have known for the last three years
since the cancelation happened is like, Okay, my path forward
is not super clear, but God has made it clear
to me, my husband and my immediate family that I'm
not supposed to stop. You know, we did some marriage
counseling after everything went down, and it was pastoral counseling,
and the pastor echoed the same sentiment. He's like, dude,
if your husband, your family, you are not getting because
I'm like, maybe this is a sign I'm supposed to stop.
He's like, nah, I don't think that's what's going on
if you're not getting a clear like stop. And so
at this point, I don't know where God's bringing me,
but I'm continuing to move forward. I am very passionate,
as you can tell about a lot of topics. So
I'm going to continue to share, keep creating, praying for
God's wisdom and guidance. But I don't have a clear
trajectory like this is what I'm doing. See you all
there in four years, you know, five years. So I'm
just going to keep going forward and see what where
God leads me.
Speaker 1: It will involve I'm predicting and far for me to
put God. It will evolve communicating, and involve this great
skill that He's given you, this conversational skill of people
listening feel like they're being talked with. So I appreciate
you coming on and what you're doing, and I accept
your kind offer to be on your program, which is
on YouTube much more successful than mine. But I beat
you in the audio sphere exactly. I beat you in
the audiosphere.
Speaker 3: Dude, I appreciate you bringing me on. You are the
first person, really I've had. I've had kind of a
conversation about this with my friend Abby, but I haven't
really gotten to talk about this with people. And I've
been saying since I met you, like mom, I think
he is the perfect person to talk about this with
because he gets it. So I appreciate you bringing me
on your show. I'm really excited to interview you on mine.
You're actually going to be the first episode of my
brand new, relaunched podcast, so that's gonna be exciting. And
I just I appreciate you and the work you're doing.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Nicky. Appreciate it all right, this is a
Todd Herman show. Please go, be well, be strong, be kind,
and please make every effort to walk in the life
of Christ.