Speaker 1: Creativity is an addiction unplugged because we will always say
yes to creativity, totally uncut because we all make mistakes,
So turn it into a tool. This is arrow unplugged,
Hey's aero, and this is vocal d FRAG right now,
before we hit the path, because we do what's called
a transition walk. We walk through the forest and we
listen to the atmosphere of now and we receive from
that as well as share it with anybody who's willing
to travel beside us. But before we go out there,
I've always taken notes. That's just who I am because
I have a d FRAG journal. You ask the questions,
you question the answers, And one of the things that
I wrote in the d FRAG journal today was based
on that I don't own the fuel to create the fire.
How many times have you been in a position like that?
You don't own the fuel to create the fire, nor
do you have the wood to keep that fire alive.
That's a big picture because a lot of people, as
you grow in age and in strength as well as knowledge,
they won't go back to who they once were, yet
they yearn for that moment. What would be like if
I had continued, or if they would have just believed
in me a little bit more. And so the answer
sometimes comes to us that you don't own the fuel
to create the fire, nor do you have the wood
to keep that fire alive. In my d frag journal,
I asked the question the little stuff is stuff that
you forget? And I came back with words of argument,
and I said, no, I set everything aside. I can't
forget if it's sitting in front of me. I get
so disappointed with myself when I can't find the follow through.
When do you get disappointed with yourself? Is it because
you personally can't locate the follow through? This is vocal
d frag. We're going to hit the path here in
a couple of seconds. I would love for you to
walk with us. Okay, it's Jazzy and I in this
beautiful forest in South Charlotte, North Carolina. We'll be right back. Okay,
we're out on the path. It's a beautiful spring morning
in Caroline. Words that come to me it was like,
where along the path of twenty nine years of daily
writing did I start to see strength in things that
I put on paper. First of all, I don't think
i'm a brilliant writer, because none of my books really sell.
I just do it because it's like I'm told to
do it. You know, you're moving through, moving through the anxiety,
moving through the fear, the shame, the dreams. You know
I can do this. I'm going to move through it.
We're going to see it happen. But it was when
I was putting together my first book, One man'senty twenty
one Thoughts. It was really supposed to be a book
of poetry, poetry because I challenged myself to write a
thousand pieces of poetry in a thousand days. But when
I was going back through the daily writing, what I
felt in my heart wasn't the poetry, but it was
rather the words and the messages of a creative mind
that was asking questions and then questioning answers. And so
I had to learn how to grow with that. And
when I invite you to take up writing, it's not
because I want you to instantly find your forgiveness, your compassion,
your belief in the things that you want to do.
Because writing is like meditation, it's going to take years
to trust it, to grow with it. So when words
fall out of the writing instrument, trust me. They're not
coming from me, They're coming from the writing instrument. Ah,
I'm just there. I just happen to be lucky enough
to say, all right, I'm going to write this, and
the words come out that I don't own the fuel
to create the fire, nor do I have the wood
to keep that fire alive that's supposed to reach somebody
as much as it empowered me. In that moment of writing,
I felt like that this is the subject that we
need to do. That we are always consistently moving in
the direction of other people's fuel, the fuel they need
to start the fire so their business or their personal
life can have success. And you're used as that would
to keep that fire alive. But what happens with the
wood when the storms come in, your mental storms, your
daily questions, your daily doubts. All of a sudden, that
fire begins to calm. And the reason why is because
there's not enough fuel to put a fire on that
wood if it's been raining and that wood is now damp.
Going through the motions of understanding who you are is
every reason why I started a defragged journal. Defragging is
questioning and then questioning the answers, allowing things, little thoughts
that maybe someone in my life would say, you what
fuel fire? Would what? That's kind of stupid? Why would
you even talk about something like that? And my answer
always is why not? What if? What if? And because
the thing is is I'm not ever going to get
it back because I was writing in that moment, and
I did put those words on paper, trust me, out
here in this gorgeous forest in South Charlotte, North Carolina.
Do you really think if I hadn't written it down
that we would be talking about it right now. I
guarantee inside my soul that it wouldn't be the subject
that we're talking right now if I had not written
it down. And it makes me wonder, what are you
needing to do to write things down? It's just a
sheet of paper, it's just a pencil, it's just a pin. Yeah,
but this is what I always get in return from writers. Well, yeah,
but I'm really afraid of what other people are going
to say. Yeah, you gotta get over that too, because
as a creative mind, you have to understand none of
this is for you. That was a huge bullet to bite.
When I was putting paint on a canvas, I had
all of these beautiful paintings in my art room, and
it was adding up, and it was adding up. I
was running out of room to even stand inside the
art room. What was I going to do? And then
someone said, put it in a gallery, sell it. Being
the unprofessional that I was and probably still am, I
knew nothing about that. But then the people came around me.
It was almost like the universe was saying, you release
that art. I will put leaders on your path and
it will happen. And it did. But I often wonder
when I stare at these paintings, the few that I
have left because I've sold all of them, I wonder
what would have happened if I had not listened to
that calling to put paint on a can us. The
same is true about daily writing, getting control and the
ownership of the fuel that starts the fire, and then
admitting to yourself and to others, I am the wood
that will keep that fire alive. I am the wood
that will not become damp because of my days of doubt.
It will not become damp during my days of fear.
I am the wood, and I own the fuel. But okay,
hold on second here, dude. You said something about moving
through something before you went out on the path I did.
I did. I'm the type of person I do not
like it if I forget something. If I have projects
to do, I physically put those projects in front of
me in my living room and my writing space. And
the reason why is because it serves as a reminder
of this is what you've got to do. So it's
not that I am lazy or I am forgetful in
my methods of madness, of setting things aside, putting it
over here, putting it over there. My most difficult moments
are locating that ability and that mindset to move through
my excuses of not wanting to do what's right there
in front of me. Now, I'm going to turn it
on you on d Frank. I'm gonna question you, and
I'm gonna question your answers. How many things in your
own personal life have you always wanted to do? Or
maybe you've got to do this around the house, maybe
this in the backyard. Listen, I'm not gonna lie to you.
I'm gonna be very transparent. In nineteen ninety seven, when
we planted seventeen hundred trees in this beautiful forest in
South Charlotte, North Carolina. Do you know the real reason
why I planted those trees? You can't turn on me. Okay,
the real reason is because I got tired of mowing
my lawn. I was like, well, if I turn this
into a forest and we make this natural, I don't
have to mow the lawn anymore. I mean, my land
is built out over hills. To get out there to
mow the lawn, that was not one day, that was
several days of work. And what about all those huge
rocks that are out there? How do I get rid
of that? So I went from a home depot Low's
Picture magazine yard to one of thost beautiful things I've
ever seen, a forest. But I wish I would have
done it in the way of saying, hey, replenishing the
land that man destroyed by putting all these houses here.
I can kind of say that, but when I do,
I'm not sharing the truth. What are the things that
are standing in the way of you that could be
great for someone else? Remember, it's moving through you. We're
all artists. It's got to move through you in order
to have a larger than life event beyond you. You're
just here for a moment, but you know what the
things that you create last well beyond the next two
or three generations. I would love to talk to the
future reader and or a writer that will walk through
this forest and they feel the same thing that I
did in nineteen ninety two. That it was like, Oh, no,
you gotta be kidding me. I got it right, That's
what I heard while sitting in this forest. It was
tiny at that time, it really was. It was tiny.
It was this beautiful lawn with some natural trees, Carolta
trees and even the gumball trees and things like that
that people really kind of rip down, you know, the
ugly trees. And there was like a little swarm of
trees over here that you know, people would have just
chopped down right away because it wasn't perfect like a
Low's magazine cover. But when we went in there with
honest to God, North Carolina pines and elms and we
designed this forest, it was done so in a way
of loving the land, not only in that day in
nineteen ninety seven. That day hell to plant seventeen hundred
trees took me almost a month and a half. My God,
and those packages kept coming and kept coming and kept coming.
But today, we're here in this beautiful forest as the
spring sunshine is on us. I'm overlooking this gorgeous lake.
You can hear the hawk in the distance. I've seen
the deer this morning. It's beautiful. They didn't have a
place to run to because man had ripped the land.
So we're going to go back to the original fond
And that is who owns the fuel that starts the fire,
who has the physical and mental shaping of creating the
wood that keeps that fire alive. I believe deep inside
my soul that my Defragg writing started in November of
twenty seventeen because I knew in my heart that I
was no longer the owner of the fuel to start
the fire. I knew in my heart that the people
that I was working with they made me the wood.
What they didn't see was how I became damp, tattered
and torn by termites. I was breaking down. I was
not the type of wood that was going to keep
them in a strong, strong form of energy. Because this
forest has been a part of my life since nineteen
ninety seven, I've seen a lot of trees come down.
I don't remove the stumps or the limbs, those limbs
were there to feed the soil so that future trees
could have enough nutrients to grow. The forest floor is
as natural as it can be because I know what's
required in order to reach not this generation, but several
more in front of us. Who owns the fuel that
starts your fire? How do you become the wood to
keep your fire burning? It's a tough question. And when
you get an answer, question that answer, and after coming
up with another question and another question, what is your
follow through? What is that place that you know that
the door is there, but you can no longer ignore it.
You're going to have to take a leap of faith.
You're going to have to reach out there and do
something that so many other people will probably look at
you and say, you got to be kidn me.
Speaker 2: That was a stupid bird brain idea. Yeah, but you
know what you did it, and the reason why you
did it is because it's preparing you for something even greater.
With that experience, you become stronger with the idea of
owning your wood and owning the field that becomes the fire, you.
Speaker 1: Have the strength to create the follow through. I'm presently
going up heart break heel. We've talked about this many
times on vocal d frag. It's a huge hill. Many many,
many bicyclists, walkers, joggers, and even skateboarders come here to
our breakhill. So to climb this hill, it strengthens my heart.
It's my moving through a difficult thing. It's making sure
that my heart rate is up to feed the blood
into my mind, body and soul, the blood that will
be required to become my fuel. Because we are the
wood and we own it, we now have the follow
through vocal Drag, I challenge you to do it. Ask
the questions grow a pair. Ask the real questions, not
how are you? Not? Hey, are we gonna make it?
Don't get a damn. Your body doesn't give a damn
about that. It wants real questions, and then h question
the answers. Be the fuel, be the wood, be the
follow through. Hi, Maril, and that spoke will be Frank