Speaker 1: Hi, it's Devon and welcome to this bonus episode. Now
this one's a little different. You see, when I hear
people talking about conscious sensuality and tantra, it's generally misunderstood.
People assume tantra is about strange sexual positions, but it's
really not. It's about a connection with your deeper sensuality.
It's about building confidence. It's about being the person you
are and being proud of it just as you are.
The essence of conscious sensuality covers many bases. It's a
deeply powerful technique. So today I'd like to share a
story with you, one that's quietly powerful, deeply human. It's
about a woman that I will call Christie to protect
her privacy. All the details in the story are true,
So if you're in a place where you'd prefer not
to listen to stories about intimate life and sexuality, you
might want to skip this one. For everyone else, just
take a nice, deep breath and let it go with
a sigh, listening with an open hearted mind. Christy first
came to me at forty six. She'd been in a
long term relationship for many years. To the outside world,
everything looked well ordinary. They share their home routines, responsibilities,
even children. But inside she felt invisible. She felt neglected.
She told me, she felt unwanted, undesired, like the person
everyone relied on to keep the home together. She did
the dishes, but she wasn't seen as a sensual, vibrant person.
She wasn't seen as a complete human. So over time
she'd lost confidence. Not overnight, but bit by bit. The
intimacy and the relationship had dwindled. When sex did happen,
it was cold and prescriptive, something they did on a
Sunday morning, and she thought sensual pleasure was something given
by someone else. If her partner wasn't present or didn't
meet her there, she thought she had no access to it.
We began with small steps, nothing dramatic. Christie told me
later that the idea of relearning how to feel sounded
almost silly at first, as if sensation and desire were
both basic instincts that should just be there. But life
had trained to to look outward for validation, and that
inner connection had gone quiet. So that's where we started.
Central presence. That took no more than five or ten minutes.
It helped her realize that her sensuality was still there.
It had just become ignored and distant. We also worked
with her in a voice. Christie had internalized messages, small
unhelpful messages like you'll pass that, well, that's not for
people like you. We tracked those stories, named them, and
gently rewrote them. Instead of waiting for some one to
say you're desirable, she practiced saying it to herself, quietly,
one word at a time. Another gentle shift was reframing
pleasure as something that lives inside her, not granted by
someone else, something not to be embarrassed by, but to
embraces a beautiful part of her. That idea landed for
her like a door opening. Pleasure as an available, lived experience,
not a reward to be earned or reprised to be
given away. It was hers to give, to enjoy. Within
about three weeks, Christie began to notice a significant change.
It wasn't sudden fireworks at first, It was little, steady things,
she said. There were nights when she went to bed
feeling a warm glow in her body just from paying
attention to her breath. She'd find herself smiling unexpectedly, noticing
the ways sunlight looked on her arms, or how gentle
self touch felt after a long, hard day. These were
the small reclamations on the journey of conscious sensuality. And
then something she hadn't expected. She experienced her first sustained
accessible orgism at forty six. She told me she'd assumed
that that moment had passed for her. She believed those
experiences were only for other people. But through constant presence,
breath work, and giving herself permission to fill without shame
or performance, her body remembered, or perhaps learned anew how
to enjoy her deeper pleasure. She described it to me
like this, She was discovering an inner flame, not a
flash of eroticism that needed someone else to light it,
but a steady warmth could return to a resource she
could draw on when she wanted, and that resource changed
how she related to her partner, her life, everything around her.
She didn't need him to create her pleasure. She could
bring more of herself to their connection, more presence, more invitation.
The difference open new possibilities for communication and for a
tenderness between them. Now, this is important, and I want
to be clear on this. Everybody's journey is their own,
uniquely so Christie's timeline was hers. People come to this
with different histories, different bodies, different layers of nervous system response,
so how you will experience a deeper pleasure will be
uniquely yours. But I do know that by learning how
to be present your senses, by restoring your permission to
fill and deepening your connection with your natural sensuality, and
practicing simple, consistent exercises can create a meaningful shift, sometimes
sooner than we expect. So if Christie's story resonates with you,
if you recognize that feeling of being unattractive, unsexual, unsensual,
and you want to reclaim your sensuality is your own.
I have a small complimentary audio that can help you begin.
It's a gentle guided meditation called the Inner Flamegateway. It's
about fifteen minutes long, and it's designed to guide you
into a RESTful state where we can safety open your
senses to your deeper sensuality. Now, you can find the
damn link in this episode's notes, or you can come
and see me at in a Flame dot com. It's
a free invitation to give yourself a moment to focus
sensual pleasure. So if you are ready to go deeper,
then you can take your inner fire even further, as
we will take you through step by step guided audios
to reclaim your sensual presence, to indulge in a deeper
level of pleasure, not just in the bedroom, but in
daily life, in the world around you, and intensify the
pleasure that you can experience every single time. So if
you'd like to learn more, you'll find a link in
the show's notes. Remember, Christie's story is a reminder that
sensuality is not an external luxury. It's not the thing
you have to ern or be given. Is a part
of you waiting for permission to be felt. If you're
listening today, in something inside you have softened, that's the beginning.
Be kind to yourself, start small notice, breathe but for now,
thank you for listening and sharing this time with me.
And if this episode has touched you somewhere deep inside,
then the inner flame gateway is waiting for you. Or
maybe you'd like to share this episode with someone who
might need a gentle reminder that they're in a flame
is always there. The same that say Spain to Spain
and pad into add a ducted and into a taducted
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