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Speaker 1: The best way to support this podcast is by going

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to patreon dot com slash Softcore History, where every week

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you will get two extra episodes that are completely ad free,

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plus an entire back catalog of episodes spanning over two years.

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What is up, Patreon, fam, Welcome back, We love you.

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You're here for another episode on Patreon this week. You

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got me at the helm Rob Fox obviously, you got

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Jake and Dan with me, uh on the side. One

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day we'll figure out how to lead in a Patreon.

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Speaker 2: I don't care like they know us.

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Speaker 1: It's like introducing yourself to your mom, you know what

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I mean. Like it's like I do a hello, you

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know Jake.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Also, if one of us gets replaced, we should

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just never address it.

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Speaker 1: Of course, No, no, never talk about it.

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Speaker 2: Like if Jake's just not here one day, it's just like.

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Speaker 1: Some guy named Mark. Yeah, from now on, never address it.

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I agree with that. They've they do that in TV

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shows and shit like uh, what's his name faceless man

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from Game of Thrones?

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Speaker 2: Right?

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Speaker 1: Or no, he doesn't get replaced now it's uh and

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the chick or the dude who was banging a narrow Oh,

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that guy the cavalry guy him, but I liked the

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guy they.

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Speaker 2: Were place him with better. He wasn't as handsome, though

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I know he.

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Speaker 1: Was way more hands The first guy was like a mongoloid.

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It was just like some big like muscly swede that

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looked weird. The second guy was handsome.

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Speaker 2: So the first guy had a good chance.

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Speaker 1: You think of it from the male gaze, women think

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of it from a completely different gaze.

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Speaker 2: I think.

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Speaker 1: Actually, Dan just was like, this is dumb. This guy's

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not Jack like the first guy, like the Jack guy. No,

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it was like very much a point of contention amongst

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female fans that the guy got switched. Really, yeah, they

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thought the first guy was way hotter.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's bullshit. You clearly have a good taste the

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toxically straight. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that guy looked stupid, like he looked like he

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couldn't read.

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Speaker 2: He did, though. He looks like he belonged in a

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fantasy world, which exactly where he was.

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Speaker 1: The other the second guy, looked like just a good hang,

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Like he's the guy you'd go grab beers with after work.

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Speaker 2: And then he focks your wife. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: The first guy is barely act. He didn't need to.

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He's just there to be handsome. Yes, he was terrible.

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Speaker 2: Why are we going down this?

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Speaker 1: I don't know, rabbit hole, I don't know. This is

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what you paid for?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we're here on Patreon.

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Speaker 1: This is the last month of the Christmas raffle. Yeah,

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so yeah, we draw it on January. For what we'll draw, well,

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when the money comes in, or we can draw whatever,

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and we'll draw at the end of the month, and

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then when the money comes in, we'll announce.

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Speaker 2: So we'll draw it in the twenty third because that's

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our last recording day because we're gonna be on break. Yeah,

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so we'll do the draw. We'll actually make a video

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for that too, for the Patreon where we'll we won't

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announce it except on the video. Yeah. Yeah, you don't

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have to watch.

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Speaker 1: The video if you don't, if you don't have access

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to the Patreon and you win, and if if you

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don't win, if it's not claimed within twelve hours, the

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money reverts.

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Speaker 2: That's not true. But we will kind of like see

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what clears on January first, see who still pays and

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doesn't do the work around, because that's the thing.

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Speaker 1: The number you see right now, or the number you

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see other twenty third is inevitably not the number that

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actually goes.

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Speaker 2: Through, and then we will contact you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, listen, show you want receipts, We'll give you receipts.

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I will never ever ever take any guff from someone

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complaining about the amount of free money they're about to get.

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You'll be fine, trust us for giving you.

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Speaker 2: So. Also, if you're well, you know, if you want

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to pay upfront for the year, that is now an option.

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Oh really, and you save yourself six dollars ooh yep,

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So is this like sixty bucks or no, it'd be

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like five and twelve and sixty right, yeah, so yeah,

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you save yourself six dollars.

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Speaker 1: Is it's fifty four to fifty four dollars for the year.

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Speaker 2: Sick, let's go.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you can do that now. That is an option

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someone was hitting.

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Speaker 2: Because I know a lot of people are complaining that

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sometimes their card doesn't necessarily, for whatever reason, go through

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a patroon. Not our problem.

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Speaker 1: But much rather have you for the whole year.

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Speaker 2: We'd rather you pay the fifty four dollars up front. Yeah,

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you don't have to worry about that.

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Speaker 1: It makes for us, it makes us less anxious. We're

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not like where where you're gonna go. You know, we

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just want to hang.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but we're also not great with our money, so

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we're gonna get that money up front and then it's

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gonna gone.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's better to get paid monthly.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I just spent like another ya tattoo. How's

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that feeling. It feels fun.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I like your sleeve.

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Speaker 2: Let people fucking see it. Let's see the art. It's

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right there. It just ends right there.

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Speaker 1: Oh, okay, perfect whole How long until dance all the

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way to the Sternum from that arm it's going all

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the way.

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Speaker 2: You're gonna connect within the next two years. I would say,

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you're gonna You're going full arm. I still gotta go

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inside the arm.

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Speaker 1: I noticed you got the Hindenburg but neglected to put

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the swastik on it.

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Speaker 2: Now, not the Hindenburg.

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Speaker 1: Actually, it's all.

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Speaker 2: Zeppelins in the Hindenburg in my mind.

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Speaker 1: In a lot of people's mind probably, yes, there's only

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two Zeppelins, led Zeppelin in the Hindenburg, and name another one,

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the Goodyear Blimp. Well, this is just a BioShock tattoo.

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So at this point, yeah, what's the other one. I'm

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going to be Assassin's creed. Uh probably Fallout sick. Fallout

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three is like three dollars on Xbox store right now.

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Speaker 2: They need to remake New Vegas for the next yen.

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That's the best Fallout.

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Speaker 1: I haven't played any but because Fallout three is three dollars,

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I'm gonna download it on three sixty. It's great and

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playing over the holidays. Why do you have three to

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sixty NCAA fourteen. I feel like that's legitimate. No, it's fair,

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yeah one hundred. Uh, well you're on the Patreon, so

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let's get into this episode.

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Speaker 2: Oh but real quick.

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Speaker 1: Also, there should be some new content coming. I haven't

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even announced it to you guys yet.

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Speaker 2: No, well, maybe we should discuss this off.

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Speaker 1: Big at the inside track. This is like the message

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we lot a veto live.

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Speaker 2: I mean, can you can try?

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Speaker 1: But I'm doing veto But I'm doing it, okay, dang,

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all right, give us your pitch. I am just going

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to start as an extra sort of podcast video situation.

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I'm gonna start to streaming playing historical games.

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Speaker 2: And for that reason, I'm out ding. Yeah, you don't

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need you, Ding, I don't need you. What do you

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mean you're gonna stream? Do you know how to.

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Speaker 1: Oh dude, he's gonna twitch sieve, isn't He's gonna age

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em ship like that. Oh, I'm gonna buy a fucking

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PC game or gaming PC.

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Speaker 2: We're not expensing that.

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna just write off for taxes.

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Speaker 2: That's fine. Yeah, well you're W two though, you can't

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do that.

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Speaker 1: What do you mean me? No, Robs, you're talking about.

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Speaker 2: I'm ten ninety nine. I write everything off.

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Speaker 1: You can write, you can write off what you can

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write stuff as a W two as well. And also

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I'm a W two at like the main.

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Speaker 2: Job, not this fucking job. That's true.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not taking tax device from a guy with

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the fucking Zeppelin tattooed on his arm. It's sick though.

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Oh man, all right, let's get this episode. We're here

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today to talk about something super fascinating. Sell it like

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just we're getting into some wild shit today. We're talking

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about House Resolution two three two six one. Oh man,

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I love that. HR yeah HR two three two six one.

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You guys know what it's about. I'm gonna take some guesses.

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I'm gonna was proposed in nineteen ten. I'll give you

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that CONTENTT nineteen ten. It's is it racially motivated.

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Speaker 2: It's I think it's uh something with sexes, so maybe

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something with women.

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Speaker 1: Is it racially or genderly motivated? No?

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Speaker 2: No, does it have to do with alcohol.

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Speaker 1: It has to do with consuming something. Fuck, um hmmm,

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it's it's I Yeah, you're not. Yeah, I'm not gonna

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get this. Yeah, it's gonna be ridiculous.

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Speaker 2: Though.

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Speaker 1: HR two three two sixty one was more commonly known

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as the American Hippo Bill.

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Speaker 2: Okay, consuming hippos like to eat? Yeah.

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Speaker 1: The bill was proposed by Louisiana Representative Robert Brussard in

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nineteen ten and backed by several big name people, including

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the famed Scout and soldier Major Frederick Russell Burnham, who

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was the inspiration for both the Boy Scouts of America

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and Indiana Jones, Huh, that might be a DAN episode

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to do. There's like a whole side story about this

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hippo bill that I didn't include because I just wanted

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to stick to stick to the hippos. But there's a

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whole size for about him and this other guy, the

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German soldier in Big Game Hunter, Captain Fritz Duquane. And

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it was also backed by Teddy Roosevelt. The bill proposed

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to set aside two hundred and fifty thousand dollars to

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import thousands of hippos from Africa and turn the swamps

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of the American Southeast into vast hippo ranches. Oh my god,

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they were gonna do what's his name? They were Pablo. Yeah,

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they're gonna do a Pablo. Oh no, that would have

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been so bad. They thought this was the best idea.

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Speaker 2: Anyone had ever had ever.

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Speaker 1: It's just like water buffalo. Like they just wanted swamp buffalo.

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They're like, we fucked up and kill all the buffalo.

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We need more roaming shit to kill. You're not far off.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, this is solely for game purposes.

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Speaker 1: Not even game for farming. This is ranches. It wasn't like,

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I mean, you could probably get on an airboat and

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go hunt hippos if you fucking felt like it.

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Speaker 2: Mm hmm.

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Speaker 1: But Teddy Roosevelt, by the way, after he had become

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or after he was done being president, I mean he

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went immediately to Africa and merked like eight fucking hippos,

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a bunch of rhinos and shit. Right, But yeah, so

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you could have probably gone and hunted over Now, this

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invasive species OZH helps farming. Uh well, we'll get into that.

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But there was a couple of reasons why they wanted it.

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So there are reasons. Two primary reasons. The first was

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because at the time it's probably still there. I don't

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really know.

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Speaker 2: Uh.

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Speaker 1: There was an invasive water plant called the uh uh hyacinth.

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Oh hyacinth.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you actually have talking about Yeah.

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Speaker 1: It's like a it's like a flower, yep, yeah, yeah,

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uh well he said that. Yes, Oh he's in a

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water water plan and say it was a flower. It's like,

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I'm pretty sure it's like a bluish, purplish flower.

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Speaker 2: I saw pink.

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Speaker 1: Yes, it's probably more than one color. They're very It's

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one of the main flowers on animal crossing. That's the

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only reason I know what a hyacinth is. Oh that

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makes sense because it's from Japan. Oh yeah, no, that

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makes sense. And the reason it was invading the air

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Louisiana was because New Orleans hosted the eighteen eighty four

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World's Fair and the Japanese brought them over as a

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gift and everyone in New Orleans went fucking bananas for

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him and loved them. Yeah, but they reproduced and they

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reproduced a sexually. It's not even like ooh, that's bad.

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So they were just that's so many like idyllic part

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like images of the South are just riddled with very

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invasive shit. Like you know how when you see like

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old plantation shots where like the oak trees are covered

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in Spanish moss. Yeah, that shit's killing the trees constantly.

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Like Spanish moss is a huge problem. It's not good.

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But it's like the right right, Like that's kind of

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I mean, I guess that's kind of a a just

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so the trees it's very slowly being eaten a lot.

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It's like, oh my god. Yeah, it's kind of a

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nutshell description of the South really just in general, it's like,

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oh that looks pretty. Don't don't get close, like, don't

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actually look into that.

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Speaker 2: Like in Charleston, they actually have a giant saber tooth

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tiger problem, just.

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Speaker 1: Water in the streets. They always they knew that, you know,

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the sabers. The Russians brought them over and everyone's like

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these are dope.

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Speaker 2: And you know, you go around Charleston, you just want

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to have a nice time with your your lady. Maybe

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the boys hit up some of the plantations and boom,

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you get marked. They have signs for it.

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Speaker 1: I mean that is a real problem in like Alaska.

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Sometimes pullar bears are just fucking water into town and

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you gotta just take shelter like it's a tornado.

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Speaker 2: In India, there's a lot of tigers in general. Yeah,

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drag you off.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to have eyeballs, you.

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Speaker 2: Have to wear a mask on the back of your head. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So the tiger, it's it's smart even like wait, tigers

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are like ghosts and super Mario.

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Speaker 2: Yes, so as long as you face them, yeah, they

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will not charge.

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Speaker 1: Big cats don't attack from the front. They will only

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attack from the back. So you don't know you're going

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to get atacked until you're already that pretty much by

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a tiger.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: There's like videos of like little kids turning around at

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the zoo and then like the tiger like beginning to

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stalk them and running up and shit like that.

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Speaker 2: Huh. Yeah. So you can take a big cat though,

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as long as you face it head on.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I won't even fight you. You just walk right

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up to it, punch it in the face. You can

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beat it to death as long as you're looking at it. Yeah,

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it's like oo.

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Speaker 2: Going back to the ghost y Yeah, yes, yeah, boo, right,

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yeah boo the ghosts boo. Yes, it goes. They fuck

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you up, okay, bitches.

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Speaker 1: So it sucks, though. The hyacinth plant was insane, Like,

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it essentially got so bad that it started clogging up

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shipping routes on the rivers that moved millions of tons

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of cargo. It was so thick the boats couldn't get through.

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Speaker 2: Damn.

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Speaker 1: So it's like jamming up the propellers and shit like that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I guess. Yeah. I mean I have a similar

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problem when I go out in Lake Austin trying to

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paddle board garbage.

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Speaker 1: And seaweed or whatever the fucking gross shit that zebra muscles.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, all the zebra muscles killing dogs and slowing down

299
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my goddamn paddle board. Yeah, I just want to go.

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Speaker 1: Man, at this point, if you take your dog into

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any water in Austin and it dies, it's on you.

302
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I don't know what to tell you. Yeah, it's kind

303
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of shitty. I mean, like literally everywhere we liked to

304
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go with her dog, it's just like, don't do that.

305
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It just died, Yeah, do not. It's kind of hilarious.

306
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So once a week on the Austin read it. They're like, oh,

307
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I was at the fucking party paddle board thing and

308
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I jumped in the water and now I have a rash?

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What's this all about? And it's like, yeah, that's what

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happens when you get in the water there, right, You

311
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don't get in that water? Yeah, yes, that's what the

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board is for.

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Speaker 2: Fucking disgusting. I hate that lake. It's foul. You also

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can have a small dog in Austin. You shouldn't otherwise,

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like a hawk just comes and swoops it up.

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Speaker 1: They have two small dogs, it never happens. Are big

317
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enough to pick those dogs?

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Speaker 2: Well that's not true at all. Actually, I remember when

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I watched Jack and Leo, I had to fight an

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eagle lies to get Leo back.

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Speaker 1: There was of all of the two dogs, that's the worst,

322
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worst one to pick Leo maybe not so much, but

323
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Jack I think could get got. There was a there

324
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was a cat. Two cats have been gotten in my

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neighborhood from a hawk.

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Speaker 2: So Will the eagle asked for a ransom, and I

327
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:20,399
was just like, I don't negotiate with terrorists. That's fair.

328
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Speaker 1: I would I would have so here was it a

329
00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:22,840
ball eagle?

330
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Speaker 2: No, it was like a golden eagle. Golden eagle. I

331
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don't even know if they're native here seems invasive.

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Speaker 1: Do you think I'm looking up hawk weight thing? Isn't

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00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:36,960
it the golden eagle the one that kills deer?

334
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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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00:14:37,559 --> 00:14:40,039
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's in like kassacks. They'll like fucking hunt deer

336
00:14:40,039 --> 00:14:45,960
with it. That's sick. Yeah, dude, no, these Yeah, the

337
00:14:46,080 --> 00:14:49,000
average hawkweight is like two pounds. It's not enough to

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pick up a fucking dog jack is fourteen pounds.

339
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Speaker 2: They have to.

340
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Speaker 1: They can't pick up anything that weighs more than them.

341
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That's how flight works.

342
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Speaker 2: That's not true. What they're like ants. Ants can pick

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up like I don't know, a hundred times there body weight.

344
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It don't fly. I'm saying strength wise.

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Speaker 1: Sure, you know what if that ever happens, fine, I'll

346
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I just have to give it to the hawk at

347
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that point, yeah, like, well you got him, I'll tell you.

348
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Speaker 2: Yeah.

349
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Speaker 1: He'd just be like, yeah, don't worry about it. Yeah,

350
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:23,080
that's funny. The other thing that the hyacinths, did.

351
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Speaker 2: You think he could like murk a hawk out of

352
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the sky if he was just like he comes down

353
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at you.

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Speaker 1: And you just get to throw a punch at it.

355
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You're taking damage though, right, You're taking damage in any

356
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animal fight.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, except for like, I don't think Rob could

358
00:15:36,799 --> 00:15:37,240
be the hawk.

359
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Speaker 1: I will fuck a hawk up, especially if I get

360
00:15:40,679 --> 00:15:41,799
to like take a tennis racket out.

361
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Speaker 2: No, no weapons, Still not worried about it because it

362
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:49,000
weighs two pounds. He's going to like take your eyes out.

363
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Probably not with his talons, you know.

364
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Speaker 1: I'll probably just grab its feet and then just.

365
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Speaker 2: Out of the sky and just slam them down like

366
00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:03,600
a fucking hulk with Loki just going boom. Yeah. I mean,

367
00:16:03,600 --> 00:16:05,200
I've been trying to get to my eyes. It's gonna

368
00:16:05,240 --> 00:16:06,000
be right there.

369
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Speaker 1: It's the perfect spot to have the most hand eye

370
00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:10,519
coordination if that's where it's going.

371
00:16:11,960 --> 00:16:13,279
Speaker 2: And you know what, if it gets one eye and

372
00:16:13,279 --> 00:16:14,720
I have to wear an eye patch, final.

373
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:16,759
Speaker 1: That's pretty rad. Yeah, both eyes on and you have

374
00:16:16,799 --> 00:16:18,519
two eye patches, that's even cooler.

375
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:19,039
Speaker 2: That is cool.

376
00:16:19,080 --> 00:16:23,159
Speaker 1: It's twice as cool both my eyes plucked out. I

377
00:16:23,200 --> 00:16:26,840
would wear too, Ray Charles should have. Yeah, the sunglasses

378
00:16:26,879 --> 00:16:29,679
are stupid. Two eye patches, but obviously they have to

379
00:16:29,679 --> 00:16:32,759
be individual. You know what, I mean, oh no, you

380
00:16:32,799 --> 00:16:34,240
can't sleeping mask.

381
00:16:34,159 --> 00:16:36,799
Speaker 2: And then you know you when you're getting or obviously

382
00:16:36,840 --> 00:16:38,320
you're married right now, but you would just feel your

383
00:16:38,320 --> 00:16:41,559
wife's wrist and make sure she's not getting fat.

384
00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:43,840
Speaker 1: I don't think the wrist is a good gauge. I

385
00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,360
think the ankle is probably a better.

386
00:16:45,159 --> 00:16:48,200
Speaker 2: But that's what Ray did. Oh really, according to the movie,

387
00:16:48,679 --> 00:16:51,399
Jamie Fox would just feel up the woman's wrist and

388
00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:52,960
see if they're obese or not.

389
00:16:53,879 --> 00:16:56,279
Speaker 1: Well, just because he's blind doesn't mean, you know.

390
00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:57,480
Speaker 2: It's gotta have standards.

391
00:16:57,559 --> 00:17:01,240
Speaker 1: Just hey, it's actually offensive of you to think, you know, well,

392
00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:03,519
you're blind, so you can't tell the difference between a

393
00:17:03,559 --> 00:17:06,240
burger and a steak because you're blind, Like, come on, man,

394
00:17:07,279 --> 00:17:08,759
taste still exist.

395
00:17:09,119 --> 00:17:09,359
Speaker 2: Yeah.

396
00:17:10,640 --> 00:17:13,799
Speaker 1: The other thing is the highacinths did where they sucked

397
00:17:13,839 --> 00:17:15,599
up so much oxygen out of the river.

398
00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:16,839
Speaker 2: Is that they just killed all the fish.

399
00:17:17,039 --> 00:17:20,039
Speaker 1: Oh no, So like all these areas where the hyacinths

400
00:17:20,079 --> 00:17:23,920
grew just became like stinky fish graveyards. I see where

401
00:17:23,960 --> 00:17:24,640
this is going.

402
00:17:26,359 --> 00:17:31,039
Speaker 2: Hippo's the hyacinth Yes, hungry hippos everything.

403
00:17:31,119 --> 00:17:32,720
Speaker 1: So this is kind of like the little old lady

404
00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:35,279
that swallowed the fly kind of situation we got going on.

405
00:17:35,759 --> 00:17:40,599
Speaker 2: There was a secondary reason. I thought they had exclusively marbles.

406
00:17:40,920 --> 00:17:44,440
Speaker 1: Those are actually ecstasy. Hippos just love drugs. Their attics

407
00:17:44,759 --> 00:17:47,960
their attics checks out. Yeah, welly do you think they're

408
00:17:48,079 --> 00:17:51,960
so like raved out and they're so they're fiending, they're hungry, hungry.

409
00:17:52,000 --> 00:17:55,440
Speaker 2: I mean they kill more people, like thousands more people

410
00:17:55,480 --> 00:17:56,400
than sharks do over here.

411
00:17:57,039 --> 00:18:00,880
Speaker 1: Oh yeah that's nice. And crocs they way more than crocs.

412
00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:03,279
Speaker 2: Crocs wish they could be hippos, Yeah, they really do.

413
00:18:03,559 --> 00:18:07,079
Speaker 1: I think part of it though, is that, like people

414
00:18:07,079 --> 00:18:07,720
are stupid.

415
00:18:08,559 --> 00:18:10,759
Speaker 2: That's always that's always a factor, right, you.

416
00:18:10,759 --> 00:18:13,079
Speaker 1: Know, because you know what I mean, Like nobody everybody

417
00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:16,480
knows a crocodile will fuck you up. Yeah, but the hippo,

418
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:20,359
the dumb fat lock and hippo, any animal that's larger

419
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:22,440
than me, I'm going to respect the shit out of

420
00:18:22,599 --> 00:18:24,400
just unprinciple, right, Yeah, it's.

421
00:18:24,279 --> 00:18:27,160
Speaker 2: A rhino that's gonna drag you into the water, yeah,

422
00:18:27,279 --> 00:18:30,680
for pleasure. And like those are terrifying. What are you

423
00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:33,640
talking about? Nobody thinks a hippo is like a cute animal,

424
00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:34,440
but they probably see a bit.

425
00:18:34,559 --> 00:18:37,039
Speaker 1: There are a lot of people that think hippos are

426
00:18:37,079 --> 00:18:38,559
they're stupid, and they think hppos are like cute.

427
00:18:38,559 --> 00:18:39,400
Speaker 2: It not in the wild.

428
00:18:39,640 --> 00:18:42,039
Speaker 1: They're dumber. They're dumber than things. I also think here's

429
00:18:42,079 --> 00:18:45,079
the thing. Two, We've watched a video this before on

430
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:49,079
another show. I think they underestimate hippos speed very fast,

431
00:18:49,319 --> 00:18:52,599
fast as in water. Fucking there's videos of them catching

432
00:18:52,640 --> 00:18:55,599
up to motor boats in the river. That's terrifying. Yeah,

433
00:18:55,640 --> 00:18:58,759
they're fast as fuck and they look slow as fuck.

434
00:18:59,079 --> 00:19:02,880
Speaker 2: Dude, they could run twenty miles an hour. Yeah on lands.

435
00:19:03,079 --> 00:19:07,039
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's insane. Yeah, people like, I know, there's one

436
00:19:07,039 --> 00:19:08,799
asshole listening to this. It's like, that's not that fast.

437
00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:10,720
It's like a lot of NFL players don't even.

438
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:14,079
Speaker 2: He that's us saying bolt running the one hunter. You're not.

439
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:16,359
Speaker 1: You're not getting away from this animal. It is a

440
00:19:16,480 --> 00:19:19,599
giant machine of death. And honestly, if you climb a

441
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:21,319
tree and the tree is not big enough, they might

442
00:19:21,319 --> 00:19:22,039
just knock it down.

443
00:19:22,079 --> 00:19:22,519
Speaker 2: They could.

444
00:19:22,839 --> 00:19:25,920
Speaker 1: They're giant. They are fucking huge. Do you ever see

445
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:28,480
that shit. I think it was like their drafts can

446
00:19:28,519 --> 00:19:30,559
do this too, Like they'll just pull the tree down

447
00:19:30,759 --> 00:19:33,359
more and like bend it over. You're like, maybe it's

448
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:36,000
not true. Oh bears, Like bears will if they can't

449
00:19:36,039 --> 00:19:37,920
get up to something, they'll pull a tree down if

450
00:19:37,960 --> 00:19:40,279
they can to like pick shit. Yeah, and like if

451
00:19:40,319 --> 00:19:42,039
you go and try to move that tree, you can't

452
00:19:42,039 --> 00:19:44,799
move that tree. Like they're just super strong, Like all

453
00:19:44,799 --> 00:19:47,000
these animals strong in a way that's like totally unfabolo.

454
00:19:47,039 --> 00:19:50,359
It's like I just someone compared, like they're like, how

455
00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:53,559
strong are chimpanzees? Like put it this way, like they're

456
00:19:53,559 --> 00:19:55,720
like Captain America strong, you know what I mean? Like

457
00:19:55,720 --> 00:19:58,880
they're not Superman, but they're like yeah, they're like like

458
00:19:58,880 --> 00:20:00,000
a massively inhales.

459
00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:02,920
Speaker 2: I think I'm taking the chimp over Captain America. What

460
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:05,400
do you mean in a fight, I'm taking a chimp

461
00:20:05,440 --> 00:20:08,359
over Captain and rather fight the chimp in Captain America. No,

462
00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:11,359
I am taking Captain in America to lose against the chimp.

463
00:20:11,480 --> 00:20:18,880
Speaker 1: Oh probably no shield. Yeah yeah, Chip's going bananas on him.

464
00:20:19,000 --> 00:20:22,440
Speaker 2: M M. And imagine a fucking chimp on like the

465
00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:26,359
super serum oh god game over the souper juice and

466
00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:27,319
soup juice.

467
00:20:27,640 --> 00:20:30,920
Speaker 1: He's already enhanced, and then he gets Captain America you know,

468
00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:34,000
would be the most apex predator on a teleporting chimp

469
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:38,079
just just fucking operates.

470
00:20:37,599 --> 00:20:41,799
Speaker 2: In front of you and face head. It would be

471
00:20:41,839 --> 00:20:42,559
so infuriating.

472
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:46,880
Speaker 1: It's constant fear. Well, like if the chimp just thinks

473
00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:49,240
about who you're toasted, It's like at that point, it'd

474
00:20:49,279 --> 00:20:50,839
be like being in war. You just have to accept

475
00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:53,960
you're already dead and then hope that you don't actually die, Like, yeah,

476
00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:58,240
you're just at apboard mechim, yeah, closet.

477
00:20:58,920 --> 00:21:01,759
Speaker 2: That was my strategy playing Mortal Kombat with smoke. Oh

478
00:21:01,839 --> 00:21:04,319
just boom. I would just transport with smoke back and forth,

479
00:21:04,319 --> 00:21:05,599
and I would span the hell out of it and

480
00:21:05,640 --> 00:21:09,640
I would infuriate. You could do the.

481
00:21:08,279 --> 00:21:14,720
Speaker 1: Rereading was fine with that as well. Sounds terrible, but

482
00:21:14,839 --> 00:21:18,640
so the hyacinths were a secondary reason. There was a

483
00:21:18,680 --> 00:21:23,400
more important reason for the hippos. The country was running

484
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:25,960
low on meat. Yeah, because we killed all the ship,

485
00:21:26,480 --> 00:21:29,640
specifically beef. We did what we didn't what's interesting is

486
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:32,119
we didn't kill well, I'll get to it. People thought

487
00:21:32,160 --> 00:21:34,559
that hippo might be a tasty substitute.

488
00:21:35,519 --> 00:21:36,039
Speaker 2: They're wrong.

489
00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:41,000
Speaker 1: Now, what was the cause of this meat shortage? Too

490
00:21:41,079 --> 00:21:41,759
much meat eating.

491
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:46,359
Speaker 2: Was it, you know, people going on trains and just

492
00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:50,559
unloading on the buffalo population with many guns from the trains.

493
00:21:50,559 --> 00:21:51,960
I'm trying to think of what it was after they

494
00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:53,519
insort their insert their quarter.

495
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:55,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's like the it's like the flat penny you

496
00:21:55,799 --> 00:21:58,200
get at the zoo. That was the old timey gift

497
00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,680
and you get to just unload and mercilessly kill thousands

498
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:03,799
of animals. I'm trying to think of what was going

499
00:22:03,839 --> 00:22:06,400
on in the early nineteen hundreds that would have been killing,

500
00:22:07,680 --> 00:22:09,720
that would have led to the death of too much beef.

501
00:22:10,039 --> 00:22:12,160
And I'm kind of drawing a blank here. Maybe just

502
00:22:12,400 --> 00:22:14,279
we're starting to see the beginning of the dust bowl.

503
00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:19,960
Speaker 2: No, it's just fucking immigrants. Wait, fucking irishmen, fucking Irish.

504
00:22:19,519 --> 00:22:22,000
Speaker 1: So there were too many mouths to feat. The population

505
00:22:22,119 --> 00:22:25,319
was exploding, okay, and immigrants were a part of it, uh,

506
00:22:26,799 --> 00:22:29,480
like the massive waves of European immigration, and then just

507
00:22:29,519 --> 00:22:33,000
the cities in general were exploding in population because life

508
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:36,279
had gotten pretty cushy. Yeah, you know, infant mortality was

509
00:22:36,359 --> 00:22:37,640
dropping that type.

510
00:22:37,400 --> 00:22:38,759
Speaker 2: Of shit, life finds away.

511
00:22:39,000 --> 00:22:42,759
Speaker 1: Life was finding a way big time, and uh, we

512
00:22:42,759 --> 00:22:43,519
couldn't feed them.

513
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:44,480
Speaker 2: So there were millions.

514
00:22:44,519 --> 00:22:46,839
Speaker 1: There were also, though, millions, fewer cattle than there had

515
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:49,200
been in the past, because all of the range land,

516
00:22:49,319 --> 00:22:53,640
like just the entire American West had been overgrazed. Yeah,

517
00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,359
and so cattle were dying. So it wasn't even killing

518
00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:57,319
the buffalo. Is that there were so many fucking cows

519
00:22:57,599 --> 00:23:00,319
and they overgrazed the fucking just to keep to keep

520
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:02,559
up with That's the thing too, Like people love grass

521
00:23:02,559 --> 00:23:05,119
fed beef, man, but it's actually the worst for the

522
00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:06,519
environment out of all of it.

523
00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:11,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, shut up, It is not the worst for your intestines.

524
00:23:11,079 --> 00:23:14,119
Speaker 1: No, it's great for you. It is healthier by far.

525
00:23:14,640 --> 00:23:18,079
But like, you can't be like a grass fed beef

526
00:23:18,079 --> 00:23:20,960
person and an environmentalist at the same I'm not Jacob,

527
00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:21,880
I'm not saying you are.

528
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:22,880
Speaker 2: I'm about gains.

529
00:23:23,119 --> 00:23:24,599
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know you don't give a shit what the

530
00:23:24,599 --> 00:23:24,920
cows do.

531
00:23:24,920 --> 00:23:25,920
Speaker 2: I don't want the corn though.

532
00:23:26,680 --> 00:23:28,400
Speaker 1: You don't want the corn fed cows. No, you want

533
00:23:28,400 --> 00:23:32,160
the grass fed cows, right, of course, I don't care. Yeah,

534
00:23:32,240 --> 00:23:37,039
I'm saying though grassfed beef is way more detrimental long.

535
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:39,200
Speaker 2: Term fake news. It's not.

536
00:23:40,319 --> 00:23:41,799
Speaker 1: He's literally explaining why.

537
00:23:42,039 --> 00:23:43,240
Speaker 2: That's so funny. I bet you.

538
00:23:43,279 --> 00:23:45,839
Speaker 1: There's so many fucking whole food shoppers that get out

539
00:23:45,839 --> 00:23:47,119
of their preus and go buy.

540
00:23:47,279 --> 00:23:48,240
Speaker 2: Grass fed beef.

541
00:23:48,319 --> 00:23:52,440
Speaker 1: It's the worst cut. Like as far as environmental impact, Yeah.

542
00:23:53,519 --> 00:23:54,559
Speaker 2: There's plenty of grass.

543
00:23:54,599 --> 00:23:57,559
Speaker 1: Of course, there's so much grass there, grass my lawn. Bro,

544
00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:02,240
We're fine. Yeah, just let him Grazeylan, I do find

545
00:24:02,279 --> 00:24:06,039
it weird. I guess beef is actually a pretty efficient protein.

546
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:08,640
Speaker 2: It's like the perfect protein. Yeah, but damned if you do,

547
00:24:08,759 --> 00:24:09,559
damned if you don't.

548
00:24:09,759 --> 00:24:10,160
Speaker 1: That's right.

549
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:12,680
Speaker 2: I don't want cancer. Okay, get your corn beef out

550
00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:12,960
of here.

551
00:24:13,279 --> 00:24:16,720
Speaker 1: Cornon beef. I love corn to beef. Yeah, it's gross corn.

552
00:24:16,839 --> 00:24:20,200
That's our people's meat. Corned beef. Yeah, actually corn fed

553
00:24:20,240 --> 00:24:22,920
beef that spans all of our I don't know that

554
00:24:23,039 --> 00:24:25,359
does lineages, Yes, really it really does.

555
00:24:25,519 --> 00:24:25,920
Speaker 2: Yeah.

556
00:24:25,839 --> 00:24:30,000
Speaker 1: Where we all come from a proud lineage of picklers. Yes,

557
00:24:30,440 --> 00:24:34,599
curing things, not any of our own ailments, just food

558
00:24:34,680 --> 00:24:35,440
so it can last long.

559
00:24:35,599 --> 00:24:38,359
Speaker 2: Speaking of pickling, I actually think I saw was John

560
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:42,680
Paul Jones pickled like his body what. I don't think

561
00:24:42,720 --> 00:24:45,119
I covered it in the episode, but I think I

562
00:24:45,160 --> 00:24:46,839
came across this. But I was looking for an episode

563
00:24:46,839 --> 00:24:48,759
of the Day but I think John Paul Jones his

564
00:24:48,920 --> 00:24:50,640
corpse was pickled.

565
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:54,240
Speaker 1: So is he gonna come back in like thirty years. Yes.

566
00:24:54,480 --> 00:24:57,559
In fact, Jones's body was essentially pickled in alcohol in

567
00:24:57,599 --> 00:25:00,599
the lead coffin, preserving his features and making a relatively

568
00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:01,640
easy recognition.

569
00:25:02,839 --> 00:25:03,279
Speaker 2: Huh.

570
00:25:03,359 --> 00:25:06,799
Speaker 1: Why it's gonna be like that Seth Rogan movie one day. Yes,

571
00:25:06,839 --> 00:25:08,519
that was terrible so I heard it.

572
00:25:08,640 --> 00:25:11,119
Speaker 2: Thank god. It was only like fifty minutes. Time was

573
00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:15,480
very short. Yeah. I think like they're like, we know

574
00:25:15,559 --> 00:25:18,240
this is bad. Yeah, we're not gonna waste your time.

575
00:25:18,319 --> 00:25:20,359
Speaker 1: So it's just like a fucking mini series, like a

576
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:22,160
mini so just a mini movie.

577
00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:23,440
Speaker 2: It was just an episode of TV.

578
00:25:23,759 --> 00:25:25,960
Speaker 1: Right, Was it really fifty minutes?

579
00:25:26,000 --> 00:25:28,480
Speaker 2: No, it was like sixty minutes. It was an hour.

580
00:25:28,519 --> 00:25:29,559
It was like a sixty.

581
00:25:29,279 --> 00:25:31,920
Speaker 1: Seven minute runtime. If I'm not necessarily funny, let me see,

582
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:32,839
though it might be longer.

583
00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:34,720
Speaker 2: I mean it felt like an eternity.

584
00:25:35,000 --> 00:25:37,279
Speaker 1: Most comedy scripts are like ninety pages, which would be

585
00:25:37,319 --> 00:25:39,240
an hour and a half. Yeah, so they cracked out

586
00:25:39,279 --> 00:25:42,240
it at like sixty seven sixty eight page or honestly,

587
00:25:42,279 --> 00:25:44,279
they probably had a ninety page script and it sucks

588
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:45,720
so much ass that they just cut it.

589
00:25:45,880 --> 00:25:49,279
Speaker 2: Like cut the cut, the fat cut, it's all fat. Yeah.

590
00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:52,039
Speaker 1: It was like an almost fun idea, but then it

591
00:25:52,119 --> 00:25:56,240
just seemed like it was like Seth Rogan just sucks.

592
00:25:56,279 --> 00:25:58,759
Speaker 2: Now, I'll be real, Yeah, I'm kind of over Seth

593
00:25:58,839 --> 00:26:01,000
Rogan as a as a purer and an actor.

594
00:26:01,279 --> 00:26:03,920
Speaker 1: I like is, actually he should stick to the pottery

595
00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:07,240
because he's like the stuff he makes, like home goods

596
00:26:07,240 --> 00:26:08,279
design is pretty solid.

597
00:26:09,680 --> 00:26:10,000
Speaker 2: All right.

598
00:26:10,079 --> 00:26:12,839
Speaker 1: I just feel like he's neutered himself very much. So

599
00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:16,440
what does that mean he's kind of a pussy. I

600
00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:18,000
was kind of out on Seth Rogan an hour and

601
00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:18,799
a half exactly.

602
00:26:18,839 --> 00:26:21,359
Speaker 2: It's not or whatever. I was out on Seth Rogen

603
00:26:21,400 --> 00:26:23,640
when he was like, let the people break into your cars.

604
00:26:24,240 --> 00:26:27,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, just letting your car broken into He's no

605
00:26:27,839 --> 00:26:29,519
big deal. Happens to me all the time. That's an

606
00:26:29,599 --> 00:26:33,839
insane way to live or to tell people to live. Yes, yeah,

607
00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:36,680
you should probably prosecute people that are breaking the law,

608
00:26:37,559 --> 00:26:40,920
Like I don't. That's where my like Las Affair bullshit

609
00:26:41,039 --> 00:26:43,839
ends pretty quickly, is like no, you can't just say

610
00:26:44,039 --> 00:26:44,960
let him do it.

611
00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:47,759
Speaker 2: You know, Oh you don't know, all those poor helpless people,

612
00:26:48,039 --> 00:26:48,880
all those addicts.

613
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:50,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, like all right, well, I guess I'll just spend

614
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:52,920
fucking eight thousand dollars a year on windows.

615
00:26:53,599 --> 00:26:53,880
Speaker 2: Yep.

616
00:26:54,240 --> 00:26:57,519
Speaker 1: Sure, super sick. Yeah, maybe just like we shouldn't have

617
00:26:57,559 --> 00:27:00,480
cars at all. Yeah, man, that's gonna to be it

618
00:27:00,480 --> 00:27:02,400
saysn't the drink rush o today. That's gonna be the

619
00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:04,079
next great political debate in our lifetime.

620
00:27:04,119 --> 00:27:06,079
Speaker 2: Whether or not you can actually drive with all these

621
00:27:06,079 --> 00:27:07,960
self drawn cars becomes a thing. People.

622
00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:10,640
Speaker 1: Oh people, Yes, people are gonna say that you are

623
00:27:11,240 --> 00:27:14,240
being selfish, being selfish and dangerous by wanting to drive

624
00:27:14,279 --> 00:27:16,359
your own car. I'm not going to say that I'm

625
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:20,200
also taking full advantage of not driving my car. Yeah,

626
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:23,119
I will happily have an autonomous car, but I honestly

627
00:27:23,119 --> 00:27:25,119
I might keep when I can drive, because it's going

628
00:27:25,160 --> 00:27:26,519
to be a debate about what do you mean it

629
00:27:26,680 --> 00:27:28,200
like freedom of movement essentially?

630
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:29,359
Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean? Like it's kind of

631
00:27:29,359 --> 00:27:31,599
going on right now with the electric cars, because I

632
00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:33,279
mean there's only so far you can go with like

633
00:27:33,319 --> 00:27:33,799
a Tesla.

634
00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:36,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to recharge. That's talk you for buying

635
00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:38,640
a Tesla, right, any electric car?

636
00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:40,799
Speaker 2: I like gasoline because I can literally just drive across

637
00:27:40,799 --> 00:27:42,440
the country and one one swoop.

638
00:27:42,920 --> 00:27:46,039
Speaker 1: Well you have to stop a realillion billion fucking gas stations.

639
00:27:46,079 --> 00:27:47,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's in California trying to get rid of

640
00:27:47,839 --> 00:27:49,000
like gas parer cars. I don't know.

641
00:27:49,079 --> 00:27:52,559
Speaker 1: Let them do whatever they want, like California.

642
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:56,240
Speaker 2: They're insane. They like, we don't have the infrastructure for

643
00:27:56,279 --> 00:27:57,599
it yet, but let's do it. Let them do whatever

644
00:27:57,599 --> 00:27:57,799
they want.

645
00:27:57,799 --> 00:28:00,319
Speaker 1: Hey, it's their fucking state. And that's that's a lily,

646
00:28:00,400 --> 00:28:02,359
right except for no, let's be mean.

647
00:28:02,640 --> 00:28:05,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, like that's fine, but I want to see how

648
00:28:05,440 --> 00:28:05,839
it goes.

649
00:28:05,960 --> 00:28:08,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's if it works, awesome, thanks for taking the shot.

650
00:28:08,359 --> 00:28:10,720
Speaker 2: And if it doesn't work, I get to laugh. Yeah,

651
00:28:10,799 --> 00:28:12,359
it's it's great either way.

652
00:28:12,400 --> 00:28:15,599
Speaker 1: It's California, bravest state, but bravest stake.

653
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:18,359
Speaker 2: California is a sixth state. It's just so beautiful.

654
00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:22,119
Speaker 1: It's gorgeous. It's impossible to live there comfortably. Everyone's on edge.

655
00:28:22,200 --> 00:28:25,359
Speaker 2: It's insane. How did they ruin It's a great place.

656
00:28:26,519 --> 00:28:26,920
Speaker 1: I don't know.

657
00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:27,759
Speaker 2: Is it ruined?

658
00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:30,960
Speaker 1: It feels the ruining feels overblown to me. Nature has

659
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:33,319
been ruining it for fucking one hundred years. It's always

660
00:28:33,359 --> 00:28:38,839
on fire, like oh well, yeah, we called the forest

661
00:28:38,839 --> 00:28:41,680
fires too fast and fuel kept accumulating in the forest.

662
00:28:42,400 --> 00:28:45,000
Well that and a lot like they were natural burns

663
00:28:45,039 --> 00:28:47,839
need to have that's the thing, like burns need to happen.

664
00:28:47,880 --> 00:28:50,200
I don't do they not do our experts in our

665
00:28:50,240 --> 00:28:53,039
prescription burns in California, they didn't for a long. If

666
00:28:53,039 --> 00:28:56,599
it didn't, that's fucking on them for sure. It was

667
00:28:56,759 --> 00:29:00,799
actually like the hippies like got them to stop doing

668
00:29:01,039 --> 00:29:04,559
that's a complete misunderstanding of how nature works.

669
00:29:04,559 --> 00:29:06,880
Speaker 2: But then they had what do you expect, one bad

670
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:10,240
gender reveal and the entire state went up on fire.

671
00:29:10,279 --> 00:29:11,680
Speaker 1: I think I think a lot of it has to

672
00:29:11,680 --> 00:29:14,839
do with the infrastructure too, just like they never fixed

673
00:29:14,960 --> 00:29:17,400
like old shitty power line holders and stuff. So those

674
00:29:17,440 --> 00:29:20,000
go live and burn ship. Yeah, you know, yeah, it's

675
00:29:20,000 --> 00:29:22,519
a it's a whole mess. Anyway, this is about hippos.

676
00:29:22,880 --> 00:29:24,400
What do we go grass? Red beef is how we

677
00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:26,640
got on there. So anyway, there was a There was

678
00:29:26,640 --> 00:29:29,000
also a huge demand for meat exports because the rest

679
00:29:29,000 --> 00:29:30,319
of the world was kind of getting a little more

680
00:29:30,319 --> 00:29:32,359
boogie as well, So we were exporting a shit ton

681
00:29:32,359 --> 00:29:36,640
of meat. It was the it was it was so

682
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:38,759
bad that it was called the meat question. It was

683
00:29:38,799 --> 00:29:41,319
a huge news story of the day, like the meat question,

684
00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:44,359
the meat think about like energy crisises, there was a

685
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:47,640
meat crisis in the debt fucking crazy.

686
00:29:47,799 --> 00:29:48,039
Speaker 2: Yeah.

687
00:29:48,160 --> 00:29:50,960
Speaker 1: Normally when something's the blank question, it's usually a group

688
00:29:51,200 --> 00:29:53,839
that you're trying to ostracize. Yeah, it's like the Jew question,

689
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:55,400
the Irish question.

690
00:29:56,559 --> 00:29:56,839
Speaker 2: Yeah.

691
00:29:56,839 --> 00:29:58,720
Speaker 1: But with the Jew question or the Irish questions that

692
00:29:58,759 --> 00:29:59,559
there's too much meat.

693
00:29:59,759 --> 00:30:03,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, uh yeah, we got we got an answer on

694
00:30:03,359 --> 00:30:04,039
the Jew question.

695
00:30:05,599 --> 00:30:09,680
Speaker 1: No, try again later. But what was the answer on

696
00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:14,000
the Jew question? Mm hmm, yeah, you could you say it?

697
00:30:14,240 --> 00:30:15,119
What was the answer?

698
00:30:15,200 --> 00:30:15,359
Speaker 2: Dan?

699
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:16,680
Speaker 1: I'm not going to answer it for you and make

700
00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:21,799
it easy less Mark Norman, He's like, where's my Jews out?

701
00:30:21,799 --> 00:30:24,160
Where are the Jewish people? And people started cloud He's Oh,

702
00:30:24,200 --> 00:30:28,759
that's a little too many for me. Oh fuck, it's

703
00:30:28,759 --> 00:30:30,440
the best. He posted like a really old stand up

704
00:30:30,440 --> 00:30:34,960
clip the other day. We're talking about how uh names

705
00:30:34,960 --> 00:30:41,000
of Chinese restaurants sound like Chinese slurs, walk and roll,

706
00:30:42,160 --> 00:30:43,000
Panda King.

707
00:30:43,119 --> 00:30:47,599
Speaker 2: And Golden Noodle. It was really funny, but I don't

708
00:30:47,599 --> 00:30:48,880
wanted to quote other jokes.

709
00:30:49,039 --> 00:30:50,400
Speaker 1: I know we're getting all over the place, but you

710
00:30:50,440 --> 00:30:54,160
remember I showed you that clown, Manora, Yeah, I sent you.

711
00:30:54,200 --> 00:30:59,119
I think Minora Clown is a fantastic juiceler you Manora clown.

712
00:30:59,519 --> 00:31:00,640
Speaker 2: I mean that's crusty.

713
00:31:00,839 --> 00:31:07,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's true. So it got so bad that people

714
00:31:07,519 --> 00:31:10,480
started to seriously wonder if they're gonna have to start

715
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:16,039
eating dogs like they were like, dude, yeah, it's.

716
00:31:16,000 --> 00:31:19,160
Speaker 2: Kind of a funny. I know, we haven't recorded it yet,

717
00:31:19,200 --> 00:31:24,319
but uh, Monday's episode kind of a little connection to it,

718
00:31:24,880 --> 00:31:28,279
to eating dogs, dog meat, to dog meat as a

719
00:31:28,279 --> 00:31:28,960
as a term.

720
00:31:29,160 --> 00:31:32,680
Speaker 1: Yes, okay, okay, you told me a little bit about it,

721
00:31:32,720 --> 00:31:33,920
so I kind of get where you're going with that.

722
00:31:34,359 --> 00:31:35,400
Speaker 2: Uh sounds racist?

723
00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:40,279
Speaker 1: Uh so because this is America and we only swing

724
00:31:40,400 --> 00:31:44,039
big that we only take big fucking swings, just all

725
00:31:44,119 --> 00:31:46,240
like everything we do is a moonshot, right.

726
00:31:46,359 --> 00:31:49,640
Speaker 2: I mean there was a moonshot get in here everything. Yes,

727
00:31:50,319 --> 00:31:52,839
we come from risk possible, let's take it. We come

728
00:31:52,839 --> 00:31:55,079
from people that got on a goddamn boat.

729
00:31:55,519 --> 00:31:57,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right, that's what California is the most American

730
00:31:57,559 --> 00:32:03,160
state too. Well then when it cross the countryshotting, Yeah, yeah,

731
00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:05,559
where I mean your people are the laziest.

732
00:32:05,599 --> 00:32:07,839
Speaker 2: I don't know, where you if you were always Florida.

733
00:32:07,960 --> 00:32:12,599
Speaker 1: But people, yeah, Philly, So I don't it's just like

734
00:32:12,599 --> 00:32:13,519
one of the first cities.

735
00:32:14,000 --> 00:32:16,160
Speaker 2: You just got there in stage. Oh, I see what

736
00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:18,000
you mean. It means we're loyal, Rob.

737
00:32:19,240 --> 00:32:21,440
Speaker 1: They were like, no, dude, they went on that trip

738
00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:24,039
on the fucking Mayflower. Were like, we're never moving again.

739
00:32:24,079 --> 00:32:26,960
It's like fucking seventeen sixty two. And your ancestors are like,

740
00:32:27,000 --> 00:32:29,759
should we go west? And they're like, no, fly eagles.

741
00:32:29,400 --> 00:32:29,720
Speaker 2: Fly.

742
00:32:31,400 --> 00:32:36,000
Speaker 1: Go birds, birds, Baby, West is for the birds. Like,

743
00:32:36,039 --> 00:32:38,240
why would you leave such a perfect city?

744
00:32:38,599 --> 00:32:41,279
Speaker 2: Yeah? Dan, why would you? It was the capitol, it was,

745
00:32:41,559 --> 00:32:43,920
and then they moved it. They built it.

746
00:32:44,039 --> 00:32:46,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, they were like, Philadelphia sucks so much. Ask to

747
00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:51,079
build this fucking new city on a swamp? Can we

748
00:32:51,119 --> 00:32:54,000
design it kind of sus Can we lay out the

749
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:56,839
city like with a pedagram and make people ask questions later?

750
00:32:57,200 --> 00:32:58,640
If I was ever a world leader, I would just

751
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:01,839
be I think like, at some point you just got

752
00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:03,559
to start adding stuff like that, and just to keep

753
00:33:03,599 --> 00:33:05,160
the conspiracy theory people.

754
00:33:05,200 --> 00:33:07,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, they did plenty of freemason ship.

755
00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:09,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, free mason ships all over the place. If I yeah,

756
00:33:09,839 --> 00:33:12,880
if like society collapsed and I somehow became like in

757
00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:14,440
charge of a civilization.

758
00:33:14,839 --> 00:33:16,319
Speaker 2: I'd be like, hey, uh.

759
00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:18,559
Speaker 1: Let's let's just build a mound just for like ships

760
00:33:18,559 --> 00:33:22,160
and gigs, and then uh uh, let's carvel Ryan's belt

761
00:33:22,279 --> 00:33:22,920
all over it.

762
00:33:23,200 --> 00:33:25,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, why I just do it. It's fun man. Yeah,

763
00:33:25,880 --> 00:33:27,359
so it'll be funny. It's kind of like one of

764
00:33:27,359 --> 00:33:30,160
those crypto guys that got off a few weeks ago

765
00:33:30,519 --> 00:33:35,920
or whatever. He had connections with intelligence agencies, oh yeah,

766
00:33:35,960 --> 00:33:38,240
in Puerto Rico, and then he was found in his

767
00:33:38,400 --> 00:33:40,279
like jeans in the water with his phone.

768
00:33:40,400 --> 00:33:42,880
Speaker 1: He had a whole like I'm not gonna kill myself moment,

769
00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:44,039
and then he was found dead.

770
00:33:44,079 --> 00:33:46,079
Speaker 2: And that's the perfect excuse to kill yourself and then

771
00:33:46,119 --> 00:33:47,039
blame it on the CIA.

772
00:33:47,119 --> 00:33:51,519
Speaker 1: Yeah. Sometimes those conspiracy guys like TODs fuel to the fire.

773
00:33:51,599 --> 00:33:52,000
Speaker 2: Yeah.

774
00:33:52,039 --> 00:33:53,720
Speaker 1: And look, if you're doing if you're gonna do that,

775
00:33:54,359 --> 00:33:56,799
like what I said, what you really are is a

776
00:33:56,880 --> 00:33:59,880
job creator. That's right, cause thousands of years from now

777
00:34:00,200 --> 00:34:03,559
there'd be a whole whole industries popping up around your

778
00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:06,039
stupid carvings that didn't mean anything.

779
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:08,559
Speaker 2: I would like to officially announce that I'm not on crypto.

780
00:34:09,079 --> 00:34:12,079
Oh you're out. I'm out. That's brave of you, because

781
00:34:12,079 --> 00:34:13,760
I think they're trying to kill it right now. And

782
00:34:13,840 --> 00:34:14,159
they are.

783
00:34:14,199 --> 00:34:15,559
Speaker 1: They're trying to regulate the shit out of.

784
00:34:15,559 --> 00:34:17,480
Speaker 2: It, I know, but they're really trying to kill it now.

785
00:34:17,559 --> 00:34:20,760
So I cashed out, and now I'm going to Hawaii.

786
00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:22,800
Speaker 1: Mahullo.

787
00:34:23,559 --> 00:34:25,920
Speaker 2: Are you all of your crypto stuff to just go

788
00:34:25,960 --> 00:34:27,480
to what I'm balling out in Hawaii? Yah?

789
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:29,679
Speaker 1: All right, I like that. I think that should have

790
00:34:29,719 --> 00:34:32,800
some hippo while you're there. I'll try it. I mean,

791
00:34:32,840 --> 00:34:34,480
if they allow me, if you can get it, I know.

792
00:34:34,960 --> 00:34:37,119
H It did not take long for major news outlets

793
00:34:37,159 --> 00:34:39,079
to fall in love with the idea and essentially start

794
00:34:39,199 --> 00:34:42,760
editorializing in support of it. The most important thing they

795
00:34:42,760 --> 00:34:46,519
could say, hippo tastes good? Does it?

796
00:34:47,119 --> 00:34:48,119
Speaker 2: Do we have a description?

797
00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:51,559
Speaker 1: It might that's fun. It might taste good.

798
00:34:51,960 --> 00:34:53,800
Speaker 2: So it's kind of fatty, right.

799
00:34:53,679 --> 00:34:55,679
Speaker 1: Yeah it is, so I'll get I'll here's some thing.

800
00:34:55,599 --> 00:34:59,039
Speaker 2: So little marbled U hippo. Well, I actually have a

801
00:34:59,119 --> 00:34:59,880
I'll have a quote on that.

802
00:35:00,599 --> 00:35:04,159
Speaker 1: Before So the people who hadn't eaten hippo but were

803
00:35:04,199 --> 00:35:07,639
just like advertising for it. The New York Times called

804
00:35:07,679 --> 00:35:13,280
hippo meat Uh, essentially lake cow bacon. Oh that sounds

805
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:14,840
good cow bacon.

806
00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:18,159
Speaker 2: Well, have you ever had beef bacon? No, sell the

807
00:35:18,199 --> 00:35:21,480
whole foods. I don't think I have. It's all right, Yeah,

808
00:35:21,519 --> 00:35:23,480
it's all right, but lake cow bacon.

809
00:35:23,559 --> 00:35:26,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, lake cow bacon. Another report noted that the toughness

810
00:35:26,840 --> 00:35:29,039
was only skin deep. The meat was quite good and

811
00:35:29,079 --> 00:35:34,960
tender underneath the hippo's tough skin. The Washington Post argued

812
00:35:35,239 --> 00:35:37,360
that if we could eat oysters and suck crab meat

813
00:35:37,400 --> 00:35:39,400
out of crab legs and we could get used to hippo,

814
00:35:40,079 --> 00:35:44,960
it's fucking fair Like. Yeah, oysters and crab meat, they're

815
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:47,480
only good because we know they're good. Well, and I

816
00:35:47,519 --> 00:35:50,000
don't know about crab, but lobster, and I wouldn't surprise

817
00:35:50,039 --> 00:35:52,599
me if oysters was the same way lobster was food

818
00:35:52,599 --> 00:35:53,679
for prisons. Yeah, I was prisoner.

819
00:35:54,199 --> 00:35:54,639
Speaker 2: Roaches.

820
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:58,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're little bottom feeding fucking yeah spiders at them.

821
00:35:59,039 --> 00:35:59,880
Crowds are spiders.

822
00:36:00,039 --> 00:36:02,239
Speaker 2: That's why whenever I find a roach in my place,

823
00:36:02,320 --> 00:36:09,760
I just cook it. Yeah it starts to scream, Yeah,

824
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:10,159
just a.

825
00:36:10,159 --> 00:36:13,360
Speaker 1: Little bit, just a human thing before you boil it.

826
00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:15,159
Speaker 2: But no one figures they don't have any They can't

827
00:36:15,199 --> 00:36:15,760
feel anything.

828
00:36:17,280 --> 00:36:20,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, I like to feel everything. Probably do you care? No?

829
00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:25,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, well that before I eat every lobster, I usually

830
00:36:25,559 --> 00:36:28,000
try to have like a three to four month relationship

831
00:36:28,039 --> 00:36:30,039
with it and really break its heart.

832
00:36:29,840 --> 00:36:33,480
Speaker 1: Take care of it, give it warm baths throughout the months,

833
00:36:33,519 --> 00:36:35,440
just like, oh, this is your routine, little warm baths,

834
00:36:35,480 --> 00:36:36,440
and then they get used to it. It's like, oh

835
00:36:36,440 --> 00:36:39,559
it's a little hot. It's like no, no, good night,

836
00:36:39,599 --> 00:36:42,760
swoopy over. Soon you'll be in my stomach.

837
00:36:43,079 --> 00:36:44,440
Speaker 2: Man. That reminds me of the.

838
00:36:44,440 --> 00:36:46,119
Speaker 1: Movie The Lobster. Did you ever watch that?

839
00:36:46,360 --> 00:36:46,599
Speaker 2: Yeah?

840
00:36:46,599 --> 00:36:47,599
Speaker 1: I have to watch it.

841
00:36:47,599 --> 00:36:48,119
Speaker 2: It was weird.

842
00:36:48,880 --> 00:36:52,559
Speaker 1: That's that was the person that did Dog Tooth as well.

843
00:36:52,800 --> 00:36:56,639
Speaker 2: Right, it's joaquinan that or is it a Calm Farrell it's.

844
00:36:56,559 --> 00:36:59,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, John c Riley, John c Riley, Yeah, who gets

845
00:36:59,199 --> 00:37:03,079
in trouble for master bathing. Yeah, it's like really into it. Yeah,

846
00:37:03,239 --> 00:37:05,400
it's has a weird move like the people if they

847
00:37:05,400 --> 00:37:06,760
don't find a mate, they end up like.

848
00:37:09,400 --> 00:37:10,679
Speaker 2: His brother got turned into a dog.

849
00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:14,760
Speaker 1: Basically, it's just metamorphosis, kind of like if you don't

850
00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:15,880
mate forever.

851
00:37:16,239 --> 00:37:17,280
Speaker 2: That book sucked.

852
00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:22,159
Speaker 1: Oh is it metamorphosis? No, it's not that. The only

853
00:37:22,199 --> 00:37:26,719
thing a beatle. That's the whole thing is about turning

854
00:37:26,760 --> 00:37:28,920
into a beetle like this is that's just a.

855
00:37:28,880 --> 00:37:31,119
Speaker 2: Consequence of things. Someone threw an apple at me right

856
00:37:31,159 --> 00:37:34,039
now it's stuck in my back. What is that? It's

857
00:37:34,119 --> 00:37:36,599
metamorphos again, I don't care. Never read it.

858
00:37:36,840 --> 00:37:38,679
Speaker 1: Uh, there is we I do have at least one

859
00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:45,679
though actual uh. Review of hippo meat's the hunter. Uh

860
00:37:46,440 --> 00:37:52,280
Peter Capstick said it's a fake name. Is Peter Hathaway Capstick?

861
00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:54,960
This is a quote. It is my personal opinion that

862
00:37:55,039 --> 00:37:57,360
hippo meat is one of the finest game foods. The

863
00:37:57,400 --> 00:38:00,079
taste is mild, less than lamb and more than be

864
00:38:00,599 --> 00:38:04,719
slightly more marble than usual venison. It tastes exactly like well,

865
00:38:05,159 --> 00:38:09,039
hippo sick and apparently the brisket of hippo is good,

866
00:38:09,239 --> 00:38:10,199
really fatty and good.

867
00:38:10,519 --> 00:38:13,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, marbled venison, though, that's a pretty good that's good meat.

868
00:38:13,960 --> 00:38:18,639
Speaker 1: That's a good match, right, Yeah, normally venison little gamy no.

869
00:38:18,760 --> 00:38:21,039
Speaker 2: Venison is delicious, but it is it is very.

870
00:38:20,920 --> 00:38:25,920
Speaker 1: Lean, yeah yeah, and it can be gamey. Well, sorry,

871
00:38:25,920 --> 00:38:28,719
you're a bitch, but I'm not saying it's bad. But

872
00:38:28,760 --> 00:38:31,440
this is marbled venison. Yeah right, that sounds great, that

873
00:38:31,480 --> 00:38:35,719
sounds wonderful. Uh So people were in love with this

874
00:38:35,840 --> 00:38:38,039
fucking idea as soon as they read about tons of

875
00:38:38,039 --> 00:38:42,440
people wrote Representative Brissard from Louisiana. They wrote him letters

876
00:38:42,440 --> 00:38:45,719
congratulating him on solving the problem like a goddamn American

877
00:38:46,559 --> 00:38:49,639
nice by taking a big fucking swing and getting ingenious

878
00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:52,719
with it. Hey, thanks for fixing the weird flower problem

879
00:38:52,760 --> 00:38:56,719
with this hippo importation solution, that is, and the meat,

880
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,159
the meat, the problem was the bigger one. Yeah, for sure,

881
00:38:59,199 --> 00:39:02,440
it is. It is kind of like two birds baby again.

882
00:39:02,599 --> 00:39:05,599
I'm gonna go back to like American ingenuity is very

883
00:39:05,679 --> 00:39:08,199
much the lady you swallow the fly where it's like, oh,

884
00:39:08,239 --> 00:39:10,079
I gotta get a spider in there to fix the

885
00:39:10,119 --> 00:39:12,800
fly problem. It's like, wait, you have a spider in

886
00:39:12,840 --> 00:39:15,119
there now, don't worry about it. There's no more fucking fly, bro.

887
00:39:15,199 --> 00:39:18,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, we make all our decisions by yolo and yeah,

888
00:39:19,000 --> 00:39:19,960
so far, so good.

889
00:39:20,199 --> 00:39:27,000
Speaker 1: It's going We are the Timothy Dexter of nations. We

890
00:39:27,079 --> 00:39:31,280
are What if we just keep going west? What if

891
00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:33,960
like we went to the moon.

892
00:39:35,320 --> 00:39:36,400
Speaker 2: And then never go back.

893
00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:40,880
Speaker 1: We're colonizing baby, we're going to Mars, right colonized.

894
00:39:41,039 --> 00:39:43,719
Speaker 2: This is Steve Aoki going to Mars. I hope so.

895
00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:47,679
I think he's part of the initial flight entertainment. No,

896
00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:49,719
he's initially going to Mars. I think he's part of

897
00:39:49,760 --> 00:39:54,639
the crew. Sick like twenty twenty three. Why, I don't know.

898
00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:58,679
Speaker 1: You can't leave Mars. We have people going to Mars

899
00:39:58,719 --> 00:40:00,679
next year. No, it's like next year of the year after.

900
00:40:01,119 --> 00:40:03,880
It's definitely not next year. There's no way we're going

901
00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:04,239
to Mars.

902
00:40:04,360 --> 00:40:06,079
Speaker 2: When I saw something with the crew and had Steve

903
00:40:06,119 --> 00:40:09,159
Aoki in it, it was weird. That sounds fake, probably,

904
00:40:09,960 --> 00:40:14,480
but it was on the internet. They need We ran

905
00:40:14,519 --> 00:40:16,800
into Steve Aoki multiple times at on It. Every time

906
00:40:16,840 --> 00:40:20,000
we're at On he's always there. It's a gym, not Mars.

907
00:40:21,119 --> 00:40:25,440
He's getting ready. It's okay, fine, you're right Dan, it's

908
00:40:26,079 --> 00:40:26,840
on it. Yeah.

909
00:40:27,519 --> 00:40:31,000
Speaker 1: Uh, he's going to Space with Elon Musk SpaceX told

910
00:40:31,719 --> 00:40:34,280
from this story is the story is from one day ago.

911
00:40:35,159 --> 00:40:38,639
Speaker 2: That doesn't mean he's going to Mars. He's going to Mars.

912
00:40:38,639 --> 00:40:39,440
He's gonna be the first.

913
00:40:39,559 --> 00:40:42,599
Speaker 1: Actually he said fuck it Juilation, He's aid fuck it

914
00:40:42,679 --> 00:40:45,039
one more. Yeah, he's just going up into space first,

915
00:40:45,280 --> 00:40:48,719
so we'll see, I mean you have to do that. Yeah,

916
00:40:50,360 --> 00:40:53,719
so whatever. But yeah, so people even people were so

917
00:40:53,800 --> 00:40:56,800
hyped about this fucking hippo idea that they heaped praise

918
00:40:56,840 --> 00:41:00,480
on it like it was like like it was saving

919
00:41:00,559 --> 00:41:03,440
humanity basically, Like it was like it was like it

920
00:41:03,480 --> 00:41:05,639
was like an interstellar you know, like they got the

921
00:41:05,679 --> 00:41:08,119
ship to to get like it's they were praising like that.

922
00:41:08,480 --> 00:41:11,440
Speaker 2: Well that's another American thing. We love to pat ourselves

923
00:41:11,519 --> 00:41:14,480
on the back. We do. We love to we love

924
00:41:14,519 --> 00:41:17,880
to just really celebrate our celeb or like our accomplishments.

925
00:41:18,480 --> 00:41:21,800
Speaker 1: Well people other people just isn't all nice? Yeah, isn't

926
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:22,559
that a nice thing to do?

927
00:41:22,679 --> 00:41:24,679
Speaker 2: Celebrate you're the smallest things?

928
00:41:24,679 --> 00:41:28,880
Speaker 1: Though, what small thing have we celebrated too much? I

929
00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:32,280
will say it is a straight up insane impossible like

930
00:41:33,920 --> 00:41:37,199
we should not have happened. No, it's so big, like

931
00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:40,400
there's no it is. It is not like the Roman Empire.

932
00:41:40,639 --> 00:41:43,559
It's not like Russia, not like anything like that, like

933
00:41:43,599 --> 00:41:48,800
the India, China, like the America exists in the way

934
00:41:48,800 --> 00:41:51,480
it does what the power has like when the thing's

935
00:41:51,519 --> 00:41:53,920
just done like insane insane.

936
00:41:54,559 --> 00:41:57,519
Speaker 2: Well, because all of our ancestors that came here are

937
00:41:57,639 --> 00:42:03,199
essentially the irrational confidence. Yeah, all of them sports.

938
00:42:03,239 --> 00:42:06,599
Speaker 1: They're either the two things and both essentially feed into

939
00:42:06,639 --> 00:42:10,480
the same endpoint. They're either the irrational confidence guys or

940
00:42:10,519 --> 00:42:13,960
they're like so desperate they have nothing to lose.

941
00:42:14,119 --> 00:42:17,079
Speaker 2: And you don't wanna fuck with someone that has nothing

942
00:42:17,079 --> 00:42:17,400
to lose.

943
00:42:17,519 --> 00:42:19,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't want to just get in a ship

944
00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:22,280
match with someone going full tilt, you know, like you

945
00:42:22,320 --> 00:42:25,280
can blow it. It's not gonna be good. No, we

946
00:42:25,360 --> 00:42:30,960
hit jack We hit the jackpot, fucking go Usa baby, until.

947
00:42:30,719 --> 00:42:34,679
Speaker 2: We crap out well, which is inevitable, but you know, no,

948
00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:35,719
that's the game, baby.

949
00:42:35,719 --> 00:42:39,280
Speaker 1: That's why space was so important, like the moon especially.

950
00:42:39,280 --> 00:42:42,360
It's like we need something to constantly have, like just

951
00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:46,440
out of reach secondary body. Yeah, we need Americans are

952
00:42:46,480 --> 00:42:48,559
the only ones invited. We need the green light across

953
00:42:48,599 --> 00:42:52,840
the bay, you know so. Lippincott's Monthly Magazine.

954
00:42:52,320 --> 00:42:57,320
Speaker 2: Another high school reading recommendation reference next week all reference

955
00:42:57,360 --> 00:42:58,119
a separate piece.

956
00:42:58,719 --> 00:43:02,079
Speaker 1: That book is the fuck sucks so hardly come out

957
00:43:02,079 --> 00:43:06,400
of a tree? Do we overrate Gatsby? Yeah, it's fine,

958
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:07,760
it's a fine book.

959
00:43:08,440 --> 00:43:10,079
Speaker 2: I enjoy it. I never read it.

960
00:43:10,079 --> 00:43:12,920
Speaker 1: It's it's do you like Leo as Gatsby or no,

961
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:17,480
It's fine, It's all fine. It's just like okay, okay, yeah,

962
00:43:17,519 --> 00:43:21,760
it's not bad. It's American novel. It's impossible to understand it,

963
00:43:23,199 --> 00:43:26,719
to understand Gatsby, Yeah, to understand any book that is

964
00:43:27,119 --> 00:43:31,159
supposedly like revolutionary, how was that one that's not It's

965
00:43:31,159 --> 00:43:34,679
not like it's fucking that's pretty straightforward. It's pretty clear prose.

966
00:43:34,800 --> 00:43:35,000
Speaker 2: Yeah.

967
00:43:35,000 --> 00:43:37,800
Speaker 1: But what I don't mean like it's like changed prose,

968
00:43:37,880 --> 00:43:40,840
but I mean like, it's impossible to view it the

969
00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:46,079
way the way the people who declared it, Oh yeah, classically,

970
00:43:46,239 --> 00:43:49,000
we classic viewed it. You don't experience it in the

971
00:43:49,480 --> 00:43:52,840
like as it being a modern day revolutionary book. Right

972
00:43:52,880 --> 00:43:55,440
it's a classic now, yeah, and it's not. And it's

973
00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:58,559
been built upon so much and boundaries have been pushed

974
00:43:58,599 --> 00:44:01,000
further and all that stuff that you it is impossible

975
00:44:01,079 --> 00:44:07,159
for you to look at that without superhuman level of

976
00:44:07,199 --> 00:44:10,320
empathy and knowledge. Almost. Yeah, you can't under you can't

977
00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:12,159
really under you could even appreciate it and be like,

978
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:17,239
oh it was it was exciting and pushed boundaries to

979
00:44:17,280 --> 00:44:19,760
write about that at the time. And you can see that,

980
00:44:19,840 --> 00:44:20,320
but you don't.

981
00:44:20,679 --> 00:44:21,079
Speaker 2: You won't.

982
00:44:21,320 --> 00:44:23,719
Speaker 1: It won't give you the feeling that people felt. Yeah,

983
00:44:23,719 --> 00:44:25,400
I mean yeah, for sure. Like it's a book about

984
00:44:25,400 --> 00:44:28,800
like how the great American Dream is very unattainable even

985
00:44:28,800 --> 00:44:30,559
if you have money, Like there is a level of

986
00:44:30,559 --> 00:44:32,320
status you can't ever get, right because.

987
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:34,480
Speaker 2: If you're a new money trash, yeah, you'll never.

988
00:44:34,320 --> 00:44:37,280
Speaker 1: It's about that. It's definitely throwing the American dream in

989
00:44:37,320 --> 00:44:38,960
people's faces. Me, Like, you can't have.

990
00:44:38,960 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 2: That, sorry, but yeah, you can have it. It's just

991
00:44:42,119 --> 00:44:43,760
you will still be looked down. There will still be

992
00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:45,440
another layer that will look down on you.

993
00:44:45,599 --> 00:44:47,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's always a higher class.

994
00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:50,039
Speaker 2: Than you pretty much. Yeah, but you're not.

995
00:44:50,119 --> 00:44:52,079
Speaker 1: You won't ever understand it the way the people who

996
00:44:52,159 --> 00:44:54,960
declared it a classic. I'm surprised people liked it honestly,

997
00:44:55,039 --> 00:44:55,760
now that I think about it.

998
00:44:55,800 --> 00:44:58,280
Speaker 2: And also it's just a lesson to never chase hose.

999
00:45:01,119 --> 00:45:03,039
Speaker 1: Yeah, did I ever say what Gatsby was up to?

1000
00:45:03,480 --> 00:45:05,280
Like what was his Actually he was a smuggler or

1001
00:45:05,320 --> 00:45:06,239
something or a bootlegger?

1002
00:45:07,639 --> 00:45:09,400
Speaker 2: Uh yeah, it was definitely I forget, but it was

1003
00:45:09,440 --> 00:45:10,840
something probably illegal.

1004
00:45:11,079 --> 00:45:14,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, well it's definitely illegal. I'm really detailing the hippop

1005
00:45:14,920 --> 00:45:16,559
talk today guys. Yeah whatever, I don't care.

1006
00:45:17,719 --> 00:45:20,280
Speaker 2: Only had half a page for this. Yeah, it's very grateful.

1007
00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:25,360
Speaker 1: Lippincott's Monthly magazine declared, this animal homely as a steamroller,

1008
00:45:25,719 --> 00:45:27,159
is the embodiment of salvation.

1009
00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:29,199
Speaker 2: Piece plenty and contentment.

1010
00:45:28,880 --> 00:45:31,639
Speaker 1: Lie before us, and a new life with new experiences,

1011
00:45:31,679 --> 00:45:35,519
new opportunities, new vigor, new romance folded in that golden

1012
00:45:35,559 --> 00:45:38,280
future when the meadows and the bayous of our southern

1013
00:45:38,360 --> 00:45:42,199
lands shall swarm with herds of hippopotami. He made a

1014
00:45:42,199 --> 00:45:44,960
great nickel on that one, on that right up. Yes,

1015
00:45:45,119 --> 00:45:49,119
that's a by the word article, m dude, either like literally,

1016
00:45:49,159 --> 00:45:51,400
he's like our lives. This thing is gonna be about

1017
00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:53,679
to enter and enter a new golden era of the

1018
00:45:53,760 --> 00:45:56,599
hippopotamus meat, dude, this thing's about to supplant the bald eagles,

1019
00:45:56,679 --> 00:45:58,920
like the national fucking serious. Yeah, it's like we're gonna

1020
00:45:58,920 --> 00:45:59,760
have that ship on top.

1021
00:45:59,599 --> 00:46:01,840
Speaker 2: Of flag mint. That shit on a coin, Yeah.

1022
00:46:01,639 --> 00:46:04,199
Speaker 1: The hippo coin. I would have liked the hippo coin. Yeah,

1023
00:46:04,239 --> 00:46:05,440
America would have been way more fun.

1024
00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:08,400
Speaker 2: Like we don't really like coins. That's kind of why

1025
00:46:08,800 --> 00:46:11,840
Saka Juwella got the wrong end of the stick with that.

1026
00:46:12,000 --> 00:46:14,599
Speaker 1: Really like coins in the year two thousand when it

1027
00:46:14,639 --> 00:46:16,320
came out and everyone was like, I don't want this

1028
00:46:16,400 --> 00:46:18,639
fucking gold coin. Give me a dollar. Where am I

1029
00:46:18,679 --> 00:46:20,400
supposed to put this in my pocket? I'm not supposed

1030
00:46:20,400 --> 00:46:21,960
to have twenty dollars the weight.

1031
00:46:21,800 --> 00:46:24,400
Speaker 2: Of a coin. Fucking screw. I like slamming down a coin.

1032
00:46:24,480 --> 00:46:24,960
It's weird.

1033
00:46:25,239 --> 00:46:28,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, but like the two euro coin makes total sense

1034
00:46:28,840 --> 00:46:30,039
to me. But if we had a two dollar coin,

1035
00:46:30,039 --> 00:46:32,239
it'd be like, what the fuck is that? Have you

1036
00:46:32,239 --> 00:46:33,239
ever seen a two dollar bill?

1037
00:46:33,519 --> 00:46:35,440
Speaker 2: Yeah? Those are weird.

1038
00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:38,400
Speaker 1: It's a Clemson thing. Actually, it's one of their traditions.

1039
00:46:38,400 --> 00:46:40,480
It's what they all get, a two dollar bill of graduation.

1040
00:46:40,840 --> 00:46:43,360
Speaker 2: It's bizarre. Yeah. I got a two dollar bill once

1041
00:46:43,519 --> 00:46:47,360
folded as a T shirt fun. Yeah, well, we're going

1042
00:46:47,440 --> 00:46:51,079
sounds useless, but it was pretty useless. But shouts my grandfather.

1043
00:46:51,119 --> 00:46:56,320
I guess for no door gobby, I guess we definitely

1044
00:46:56,360 --> 00:46:56,880
didn't do it.

1045
00:46:57,639 --> 00:47:01,679
Speaker 1: The head of the Forestry Service under Teddy Rooseveltford Pinchot

1046
00:47:02,199 --> 00:47:05,519
told Brussard, like these people they.

1047
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:07,000
Speaker 2: Were just on a full heat check at this point.

1048
00:47:07,639 --> 00:47:09,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, he told Brussard, the representative.

1049
00:47:09,320 --> 00:47:12,360
Speaker 2: He goes any relation to Chris, doubt.

1050
00:47:12,079 --> 00:47:18,599
Speaker 1: It unless he did something not great. Yeah, unless he's

1051
00:47:18,639 --> 00:47:24,320
on the wrong side of history. Yeah, well Chris is

1052
00:47:24,360 --> 00:47:27,920
pretty he's pretty well what Chris is pretty light skinned?

1053
00:47:27,920 --> 00:47:28,239
Speaker 2: He is.

1054
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:34,119
Speaker 1: I mean, he's definitely like has white heritage, you have

1055
00:47:34,199 --> 00:47:38,199
to but I don't care anyway, He told Broussard, uh,

1056
00:47:38,679 --> 00:47:41,440
I have talked with a good many men about the plan,

1057
00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:44,079
and no one has developed any weak points.

1058
00:47:44,159 --> 00:47:44,360
Speaker 2: Yet.

1059
00:47:44,760 --> 00:47:49,079
Speaker 1: Everyone's just all gas on this. He's like, yes, we're

1060
00:47:49,079 --> 00:47:52,320
gonna import thousands of hippos to America and we can't

1061
00:47:52,400 --> 00:47:56,159
find any any flaws with this plan at fucking hard.

1062
00:47:57,119 --> 00:48:00,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're like, we're good to go.

1063
00:48:00,360 --> 00:48:03,119
Speaker 1: I'm gonna submit this bill to fucking City Hall next.

1064
00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:06,599
It's just for fun. The guys who were developing the

1065
00:48:06,599 --> 00:48:10,079
plan were fully convinced they were geniuses. The first person

1066
00:48:10,119 --> 00:48:15,039
that Brossard had testified to Congress to propose HR whatever

1067
00:48:15,519 --> 00:48:17,960
was a man by the name of William Newton Irwin.

1068
00:48:18,719 --> 00:48:23,440
He was a veteran researcher with the USDA the Bureau

1069
00:48:23,519 --> 00:48:26,519
of Plant Industry at the USDA. Specifically, he was a

1070
00:48:26,519 --> 00:48:28,719
big fan of crazy ideas. Actually, I don't even know

1071
00:48:28,719 --> 00:48:31,159
if this idea is crazy, but he also had previously

1072
00:48:31,199 --> 00:48:35,119
advocated that Americans switched from eating chicken eggs to turkey eggs.

1073
00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:36,360
I'll be a turkey egg.

1074
00:48:36,400 --> 00:48:37,039
Speaker 2: I want to know that.

1075
00:48:37,239 --> 00:48:39,960
Speaker 1: Turkey egg is bigger and this is important for back

1076
00:48:40,000 --> 00:48:45,800
then thicker membrane, so it keeps a long long time.

1077
00:48:46,079 --> 00:48:48,239
So eggs our eggs only go bad in America because

1078
00:48:48,239 --> 00:48:49,920
they wash them and then we have to refrigerate them.

1079
00:48:49,920 --> 00:48:51,880
They wash the membrane off. You keep the membrane on.

1080
00:48:51,880 --> 00:48:54,719
You don't have to refrigerate eggs. Turkey is the far left.

1081
00:48:55,039 --> 00:48:57,679
It's right next to chicken. That is Turkey eggs also

1082
00:48:57,719 --> 00:49:00,440
make you tired. Don't know, that's a good question. Trip

1083
00:49:00,480 --> 00:49:02,280
to fan. I don't know if they're fetuses of tripped

1084
00:49:02,320 --> 00:49:04,800
a fan, if they're amniotic fluid as tripped whatever the

1085
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:07,159
fuck's in an egg? Duck eggs slaps, though I love

1086
00:49:07,159 --> 00:49:08,119
a good duck egg.

1087
00:49:08,519 --> 00:49:11,079
Speaker 2: And quail egg. Again, I don't like eggs. I love eggs,

1088
00:49:11,119 --> 00:49:12,480
I'll eat them, but I don't like them.

1089
00:49:12,719 --> 00:49:14,920
Speaker 1: It's my favorite part of ramen. I'm not in love

1090
00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:15,400
with eggs.

1091
00:49:15,400 --> 00:49:18,119
Speaker 2: The worst part of ramen. I always give away my eggmen. Oh,

1092
00:49:18,440 --> 00:49:18,719
let me know.

1093
00:49:18,760 --> 00:49:20,119
Speaker 1: Next time you're going, it's my favorite part.

1094
00:49:20,159 --> 00:49:20,559
Speaker 2: Let's do it.

1095
00:49:20,679 --> 00:49:22,639
Speaker 1: Yeah, what pisses me. The main thing I just like

1096
00:49:22,679 --> 00:49:25,760
about eggs currently is that every fucking breakfast taco place

1097
00:49:25,800 --> 00:49:26,239
in this town.

1098
00:49:26,280 --> 00:49:29,719
Speaker 2: Yep. We've definitely hashed this out.

1099
00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:31,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm usually drunker than I am right now. So,

1100
00:49:33,719 --> 00:49:35,280
but yeah, he wanted to do turkey. He wanted to

1101
00:49:35,320 --> 00:49:37,039
swap out chicken eggs for turkey eggs.

1102
00:49:38,360 --> 00:49:40,480
Speaker 2: Turkey should be the American symbol.

1103
00:49:41,039 --> 00:49:42,920
Speaker 1: It was supposed to be, yeah, Ben, I think was

1104
00:49:42,960 --> 00:49:44,000
advocated it.

1105
00:49:43,960 --> 00:49:46,039
Speaker 2: Really should be. There's so many goddamn turkeys.

1106
00:49:46,199 --> 00:49:48,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's more of an American bird. Their dicks

1107
00:49:48,840 --> 00:49:52,239
are red, white and blue. They are dicks and then they're dicks.

1108
00:49:53,440 --> 00:49:55,159
I mean they're really hard to hunt.

1109
00:49:55,360 --> 00:49:57,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. Are they like wild turkey?

1110
00:49:57,920 --> 00:50:00,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to be, like it's it's a super

1111
00:50:00,760 --> 00:50:03,039
stealthy hunt too. I'm pretty sure, Like you don't just

1112
00:50:03,079 --> 00:50:05,360
like go bul rush and kill some turkeys. Hey don't,

1113
00:50:05,360 --> 00:50:07,800
because I've been golfing where they just are fucking walking

1114
00:50:07,800 --> 00:50:09,639
around like they like they don't care about you.

1115
00:50:09,880 --> 00:50:12,119
Speaker 2: But that's like deer too, Like it's really it's harder

1116
00:50:12,400 --> 00:50:14,639
to hunt a deer when you're hunting a deer than

1117
00:50:14,679 --> 00:50:16,360
it is when you're just like out in the wild

1118
00:50:16,360 --> 00:50:17,119
and you see a deer.

1119
00:50:17,280 --> 00:50:20,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you got to nag the animal. Yes, you

1120
00:50:20,320 --> 00:50:21,639
gotta act like you don't want to kill it.

1121
00:50:21,840 --> 00:50:24,519
Speaker 2: Right, If you go on a golf course and you

1122
00:50:24,559 --> 00:50:27,639
just have a shotgun or just a rifle in your bag,

1123
00:50:27,960 --> 00:50:28,679
you will get a deer.

1124
00:50:28,719 --> 00:50:30,400
Speaker 1: You'll get a deer, you will get enough meat for

1125
00:50:30,480 --> 00:50:30,840
the year.

1126
00:50:31,079 --> 00:50:31,360
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1127
00:50:32,360 --> 00:50:34,159
Speaker 1: But if you go out, you get there at four

1128
00:50:34,199 --> 00:50:35,920
in the morning, You get up in your deer blind

1129
00:50:35,960 --> 00:50:39,679
with a fucking thermos of coffee and you're just you know,

1130
00:50:39,679 --> 00:50:40,559
ready to go, and you're sitting.

1131
00:50:40,599 --> 00:50:42,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're getting You're getting up at four in the morning,

1132
00:50:42,599 --> 00:50:46,239
going in your tree stand. Yeah. It's just a nice

1133
00:50:46,760 --> 00:50:50,039
crisp December day. And by that I mean it's raining, it's.

1134
00:50:49,920 --> 00:50:53,559
Speaker 1: Cold as shit. Ry Gray, you're with your dad. You're

1135
00:50:53,559 --> 00:50:54,480
not getting fucking shit.

1136
00:50:55,039 --> 00:50:56,960
Speaker 2: You just you just got your hunting license because you're

1137
00:50:57,000 --> 00:51:00,719
twelve and.

1138
00:50:59,159 --> 00:51:00,840
Speaker 1: It's time for you to carry on the tradition of

1139
00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:01,480
killing thing.

1140
00:51:01,360 --> 00:51:04,079
Speaker 2: Too Oddly specific, every time I went on I never

1141
00:51:04,079 --> 00:51:06,960
saw deer. They just don't exist when you when you

1142
00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:07,559
have the gun.

1143
00:51:07,559 --> 00:51:10,960
Speaker 1: Right, they exist when you're driving in the dark. Yeah,

1144
00:51:11,119 --> 00:51:13,480
where you're in a golf card that actually deer might

1145
00:51:13,519 --> 00:51:16,840
actually operate. It's a dude. There's so many deer I've

1146
00:51:16,840 --> 00:51:19,760
almost hit just driving to work here, like yeah, back

1147
00:51:19,840 --> 00:51:23,920
that rolling wood like dip oh forest. Yeah.

1148
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:26,360
Speaker 2: So I mean when you're on the golf course though,

1149
00:51:26,360 --> 00:51:30,280
when you see a deer, just amport just take dead aim,

1150
00:51:30,320 --> 00:51:32,239
just drive right into his face.

1151
00:51:32,360 --> 00:51:33,760
Speaker 1: What if you killed it with the golf ball and

1152
00:51:33,800 --> 00:51:35,960
the golf course is like, that's fine, but you have

1153
00:51:36,000 --> 00:51:39,039
to dress it. Yeah, right now the comes out with

1154
00:51:39,079 --> 00:51:40,719
a fucking knife, just like all right.

1155
00:51:40,639 --> 00:51:44,599
Speaker 2: Like you dress it right here the game commission where

1156
00:51:44,599 --> 00:51:46,000
the warden's gonna come out.

1157
00:51:46,239 --> 00:51:47,960
Speaker 1: That's why I want to go hog hunting, because you

1158
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:52,239
can just leave it like you just get to shoot ship. Well, yeah,

1159
00:51:52,280 --> 00:51:54,440
don't don't want the hogs eat the hog to probably.

1160
00:51:54,599 --> 00:51:56,679
Speaker 2: Well, I'm only going to go hog hunting if it's

1161
00:51:56,679 --> 00:52:00,440
out of a helicopter in Florida. No here, Yeah, but

1162
00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:01,800
it's got I gotta be in a helicopter.

1163
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:04,119
Speaker 1: I thought be dope at with a shotgun.

1164
00:52:04,159 --> 00:52:04,559
Speaker 2: Pretty sure.

1165
00:52:04,599 --> 00:52:07,320
Speaker 1: It's open season too, it's like all year the Yeah,

1166
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:09,599
I think that's what I'm saying. It's like always all

1167
00:52:09,639 --> 00:52:12,039
the time. There is no season, it's constant. Yeah yeah,

1168
00:52:12,079 --> 00:52:14,320
well there's no seasons in Florida anyway, so no, it's

1169
00:52:14,360 --> 00:52:18,119
just hot, yeah, or dry. In one scientific paper, Irwin

1170
00:52:18,679 --> 00:52:20,880
the guy about the turkey eggs and the first person

1171
00:52:20,920 --> 00:52:23,880
to be testifying before Congress about how we shoul bring

1172
00:52:24,000 --> 00:52:28,840
hippos again, this is how much he believed in both

1173
00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:32,639
himself and the hippo idea. Irwin compared himself to Christopher

1174
00:52:32,639 --> 00:52:36,840
Columbus being laughed at as he sailed toward what people

1175
00:52:36,880 --> 00:52:38,639
thought was the edge of the earth, but was in

1176
00:52:38,679 --> 00:52:42,440
reality a new and uh, you know, a new land.

1177
00:52:42,559 --> 00:52:46,039
And so basically Irwin was the Christopher Columbus of nutrition.

1178
00:52:47,000 --> 00:52:51,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, sure, why not, you know, just throw out wild

1179
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:54,360
accusations and proclamations.

1180
00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:57,079
Speaker 1: Yeah, I thought Christopher Columbus was sailing off the edge

1181
00:52:57,119 --> 00:53:00,639
of the earth either. They did think he wasting his time. Yeah,

1182
00:53:00,719 --> 00:53:02,960
but like they knew the earth was round. I never

1183
00:53:03,039 --> 00:53:05,360
knew how that got into the like that that parable

1184
00:53:05,400 --> 00:53:08,159
started becoming part of that because people liked to dunk

1185
00:53:08,159 --> 00:53:08,519
on people.

1186
00:53:08,880 --> 00:53:10,639
Speaker 2: Was he Italian or was he Spanish?

1187
00:53:10,760 --> 00:53:13,119
Speaker 1: Well, he was an Italian that sailed out, sailed under

1188
00:53:13,159 --> 00:53:14,000
Spain out.

1189
00:53:13,800 --> 00:53:18,039
Speaker 2: Of new evidence. Mainstream archeologists think.

1190
00:53:18,079 --> 00:53:21,239
Speaker 1: Mainstream archaeology will tech knowledge if they found out Chris

1191
00:53:21,280 --> 00:53:24,079
Columbus was like sub Saharan African. Do you think he'd

1192
00:53:24,079 --> 00:53:28,840
get his day back? Yes, probably immediately. Yeah, Like if

1193
00:53:28,880 --> 00:53:31,840
we found out Christopher Columbus was black, the Columbus day

1194
00:53:31,840 --> 00:53:37,679
would be re reviewed. I just I'm curious run it back. Yeah,

1195
00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:38,960
I think we might change.

1196
00:53:39,119 --> 00:53:45,000
Speaker 2: Well, if he is Italian, Veronica thinks, you know, it would, okay, Yeah.

1197
00:53:45,000 --> 00:53:49,519
Speaker 1: Yeah, well if he is from a certain part, if

1198
00:53:49,519 --> 00:53:52,400
he's Sicilian, Yep, there's a good chance he was perfectly

1199
00:53:52,760 --> 00:53:56,679
African in his blood. Sure, just because there was ciisically

1200
00:53:56,719 --> 00:54:00,000
was conquered by the some caliphate for a long time.

1201
00:54:00,280 --> 00:54:02,119
Speaker 2: North African situation.

1202
00:54:02,360 --> 00:54:05,800
Speaker 1: So they all share the same sea, same what sea?

1203
00:54:06,039 --> 00:54:08,280
They all share the sea? They all Yeah, they're very

1204
00:54:08,280 --> 00:54:10,119
close to each other. It's a big highway.

1205
00:54:10,159 --> 00:54:11,119
Speaker 2: Really yeah.

1206
00:54:11,320 --> 00:54:15,199
Speaker 1: Next up was Indiana Jones, who argued that it was

1207
00:54:15,239 --> 00:54:18,360
weird that Americans only eat chicken, pork, cows, and sheep.

1208
00:54:19,960 --> 00:54:22,880
Speaker 2: Indiana Jones did this, Yeah, yeah, what's Harrison Ford doing.

1209
00:54:22,719 --> 00:54:25,079
Speaker 1: That Burnham guy who was Indian. Jones was based on

1210
00:54:25,320 --> 00:54:26,679
Oh gotcha, gotcha y yeah.

1211
00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:27,400
Speaker 2: Uh.

1212
00:54:28,239 --> 00:54:32,000
Speaker 1: He said that essentially, like the only reason we eat

1213
00:54:32,039 --> 00:54:33,960
those animals is because we just kind of got used

1214
00:54:34,000 --> 00:54:36,639
to it over time. They were also imported from Europe

1215
00:54:36,840 --> 00:54:40,599
or from somewhere else, and you know, like eventually, the

1216
00:54:40,639 --> 00:54:43,719
way that we Americans felt about chicken soup and pork chops,

1217
00:54:43,719 --> 00:54:45,679
we'd feel about hippo roasts as well.

1218
00:54:45,840 --> 00:54:46,280
Speaker 2: Totally.

1219
00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:51,039
Speaker 1: I think we're past being weird about food as a

1220
00:54:51,079 --> 00:54:55,239
society just in general too. I've had kangaroo. Yeah, like

1221
00:54:55,280 --> 00:54:58,280
I count anyone that's picky now, I'm like, I kind

1222
00:54:58,320 --> 00:54:59,039
of look down on them.

1223
00:54:59,119 --> 00:55:01,360
Speaker 2: Dude. I bet there's a high end restaurant somewhere in

1224
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:02,840
this country that serves hippo.

1225
00:55:03,119 --> 00:55:05,320
Speaker 1: I guarantee you there is. I'm sure you google it. Yeah,

1226
00:55:05,400 --> 00:55:07,320
I eat hippo. I'll google it right now and I

1227
00:55:07,360 --> 00:55:09,360
will do it. If it's an Austin, I'll go eat hippo.

1228
00:55:09,440 --> 00:55:10,159
Speaker 2: Let's go eat hippo.

1229
00:55:10,320 --> 00:55:12,599
Speaker 1: What a lonesome dove just had a hippo steak hippo night.

1230
00:55:12,760 --> 00:55:15,599
Speaker 2: It's off menu. You gotta be in the now.

1231
00:55:16,079 --> 00:55:18,159
Speaker 1: You have to the waiter ask what you would like,

1232
00:55:18,199 --> 00:55:22,840
and you're like, I'm hungry, hungry.

1233
00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:27,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, those are the key words. I'm feeling hungry, hungry.

1234
00:55:27,239 --> 00:55:29,119
How hungry? Are you hungry?

1235
00:55:29,199 --> 00:55:35,800
Speaker 1: Hungry? Yes, sir say no, that would be very Austin too.

1236
00:55:35,960 --> 00:55:38,280
I feel like that's a very awestin thing, Like the

1237
00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:43,679
secret password to get into goddamn bar. Yeah, there's nothing

1238
00:55:43,800 --> 00:55:47,039
that's a bigger letdown or waste of time than speakeasy.

1239
00:55:47,079 --> 00:55:49,760
Speaker 2: You have to like know the password too. They're terrible.

1240
00:55:49,960 --> 00:55:53,000
Speaker 1: They're the worst. Is that one floppy disk? Fuck floppy disk.

1241
00:55:53,079 --> 00:55:57,360
All this company I wish the bar was attached to

1242
00:55:57,519 --> 00:55:58,159
is open still.

1243
00:55:58,239 --> 00:56:00,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, you want to spend twenty two dollars on a

1244
00:56:00,119 --> 00:56:02,239
pretty mid mid fashion Oh my god.

1245
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:04,760
Speaker 1: And it's just like tell people you went there. It's

1246
00:56:04,760 --> 00:56:05,639
so fucking dumb.

1247
00:56:06,000 --> 00:56:09,159
Speaker 2: Although I do like the speakeasy in green Light Social

1248
00:56:09,920 --> 00:56:11,599
it's behind the mayor. Yeah, that was dope because then

1249
00:56:11,599 --> 00:56:12,559
you can just look at the other.

1250
00:56:12,719 --> 00:56:15,519
Speaker 1: Like I walked in there and they were like get out.

1251
00:56:15,639 --> 00:56:18,719
I was like, why, oh you? Just like going by accident.

1252
00:56:19,159 --> 00:56:21,280
I knew there was something back there because people that

1253
00:56:21,320 --> 00:56:23,960
were not staff kept walking into like a freezer, and

1254
00:56:24,000 --> 00:56:25,960
I was like, all right, yeah, what's I went back

1255
00:56:25,960 --> 00:56:28,719
there once with Dom. It was fine. I mean, you

1256
00:56:28,760 --> 00:56:33,440
know it was whatever. Next up was Duquane, the hunter

1257
00:56:33,960 --> 00:56:36,760
he turned turns out he was a noted douchebag. Oh

1258
00:56:36,840 --> 00:56:40,159
yeah yeah. In fact, during the Boer Wars in South Africa,

1259
00:56:40,599 --> 00:56:43,079
he and Burnham were on opposite sides and it vowed

1260
00:56:43,079 --> 00:56:43,920
to murder each other.

1261
00:56:44,599 --> 00:56:44,960
Speaker 2: Damn.

1262
00:56:45,599 --> 00:56:47,480
Speaker 1: And this is the whole, the whole other story of that.

1263
00:56:47,480 --> 00:56:48,599
I didn't have time to cover.

1264
00:56:48,559 --> 00:56:50,320
Speaker 2: So not many of their words.

1265
00:56:50,599 --> 00:56:52,840
Speaker 1: Uh well, they were like it was like an honorable

1266
00:56:52,840 --> 00:56:55,360
truce so they could come together and make sure Americans

1267
00:56:55,480 --> 00:57:00,679
ate hippo. Interesting, yea, this is bigger than feuds. Huh yeah,

1268
00:57:00,840 --> 00:57:04,800
this is bigger than feuds. So du Quane had also

1269
00:57:04,840 --> 00:57:07,320
made a name for himself by advising Teddy Roosevelt on

1270
00:57:07,440 --> 00:57:10,840
that big hunting trip I told you about. Uh, Roosevelt was,

1271
00:57:10,920 --> 00:57:12,639
you know, prepping for this big game hunting trip in

1272
00:57:12,639 --> 00:57:14,440
Africo and was asking a bunch of noted hunters like

1273
00:57:14,639 --> 00:57:16,480
type of gun should I bring? How does the lion?

1274
00:57:17,079 --> 00:57:19,480
You know, what does the lion act like during the day,

1275
00:57:19,519 --> 00:57:21,880
Like when would the lion be stocking that type of whatever?

1276
00:57:22,639 --> 00:57:24,320
Where where should I shoot an elephant? I don't I

1277
00:57:24,320 --> 00:57:26,639
don't mean to be rude and interrupt. We can buy

1278
00:57:26,639 --> 00:57:32,920
a hippo for twenty nine hundred dollars gil the whole carcass. No,

1279
00:57:33,239 --> 00:57:34,280
a living hippo.

1280
00:57:34,480 --> 00:57:38,480
Speaker 2: I don't want that. Where from whom.

1281
00:57:38,760 --> 00:57:44,360
Speaker 1: Wild Animals and Pets dot com? That sounds illegal? Yeah,

1282
00:57:44,400 --> 00:57:47,000
there's no way. What's the plus? It's what's plus twenty

1283
00:57:47,079 --> 00:57:48,079
five country code?

1284
00:57:50,079 --> 00:57:54,079
Speaker 2: Uh? Hey, where are you storing the hippo? B what

1285
00:57:54,119 --> 00:57:57,599
are the hippo? Was just gonna buy the hippot, kill

1286
00:57:57,599 --> 00:58:01,239
it and then bermuda is twenty five?

1287
00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:04,880
Speaker 1: Oh this is scam? Yeah, yeah, like, oh yes, just

1288
00:58:04,880 --> 00:58:06,679
send us the money and the hippo will be on

1289
00:58:06,760 --> 00:58:10,639
the way. We will send you theippo post haste. You're

1290
00:58:10,679 --> 00:58:13,280
just like emailing you like, hey, guys, I'm sure everything's

1291
00:58:13,280 --> 00:58:14,199
crazy there right now.

1292
00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:18,039
Speaker 2: The hippo still hasn't calm. You know again, I'm sure

1293
00:58:18,360 --> 00:58:21,440
shipping hippo's crazy. I don't want to, you know, rude. Yeah,

1294
00:58:21,440 --> 00:58:23,159
but I'm just you know, wondering if they're on the

1295
00:58:23,159 --> 00:58:25,199
way to the studio on two ninety you just see

1296
00:58:25,199 --> 00:58:27,079
one of those hucks with oversized lower and just a

1297
00:58:27,159 --> 00:58:27,920
hippo on the back.

1298
00:58:28,400 --> 00:58:32,840
Speaker 1: I mean you with a two Jake Goldman courtesy of

1299
00:58:34,079 --> 00:58:35,320
Software History.

1300
00:58:35,800 --> 00:58:37,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, but then it shows up to your place. What

1301
00:58:37,199 --> 00:58:40,119
do you do with it? What's the move it goes?

1302
00:58:40,320 --> 00:58:41,440
It shows up to your house? What are you doing?

1303
00:58:41,519 --> 00:58:44,119
Kill it? Need a hippo, Yeah, it's front door. Put

1304
00:58:44,159 --> 00:58:47,960
it in my line. Just put in the back figure

1305
00:58:48,000 --> 00:58:49,000
putting like a kiddie pool.

1306
00:58:49,119 --> 00:58:52,079
Speaker 1: Yeah, I got a kiddy pool. He does. Yeah, see

1307
00:58:52,079 --> 00:58:52,960
you put the kiddie pull out.

1308
00:58:53,039 --> 00:58:55,000
Speaker 2: Let the hippo. Deal with that. Yeah, you can hop

1309
00:58:55,039 --> 00:58:57,199
in there. Give him a little ball to play with. Yeah.

1310
00:58:57,280 --> 00:59:00,719
Speaker 1: Don't let wheeler out back ever ever. Yeah, actually no

1311
00:59:00,719 --> 00:59:01,960
one's allowed out back anymore.

1312
00:59:02,039 --> 00:59:02,239
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1313
00:59:02,400 --> 00:59:05,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you're not gonna escape that hippo. I mean,

1314
00:59:05,239 --> 00:59:06,880
the hipop knocks down your fence in the first dape

1315
00:59:09,119 --> 00:59:10,880
and then some child probably gets eaten alive.

1316
00:59:12,559 --> 00:59:15,320
Speaker 2: I don't know about hip hope. I don't don't know

1317
00:59:15,320 --> 00:59:18,119
what that is, but I guess you can get a

1318
00:59:18,119 --> 00:59:20,360
baby hippo and then just train it from you good,

1319
00:59:20,440 --> 00:59:21,119
from its youth.

1320
00:59:21,840 --> 00:59:24,840
Speaker 1: That's what you think we did a I think some

1321
00:59:25,039 --> 00:59:27,079
story on that a while back, like or I at

1322
00:59:27,159 --> 00:59:30,239
least just saw it. Some fucking South African guy there

1323
00:59:30,280 --> 00:59:32,880
was like an orphaned hippo and he started taking care

1324
00:59:32,920 --> 00:59:34,280
of it and it lived in his river on his

1325
00:59:34,280 --> 00:59:36,519
farm and some farmer and he was like, oh, it's

1326
00:59:36,559 --> 00:59:37,800
my friend. It grew up with me.

1327
00:59:38,039 --> 00:59:38,480
Speaker 2: I love it.

1328
00:59:38,519 --> 00:59:40,039
Speaker 1: And he would like ride it sometimes and the hip

1329
00:59:40,119 --> 00:59:43,639
would always greet him. And then one day the hippo

1330
00:59:43,800 --> 00:59:45,360
decided to do hippo shit.

1331
00:59:46,079 --> 00:59:48,679
Speaker 2: M hmm, it'd be like that sometimes.

1332
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:50,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, however the guy apart.

1333
00:59:50,800 --> 00:59:55,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's unfortunate. However, I always see those videos of that, like,

1334
00:59:55,920 --> 00:59:59,360
you know, somebody that rescued a cub lion, right and

1335
00:59:59,360 --> 01:00:02,480
then releases out to the wild and they finally reunite

1336
01:00:02,480 --> 01:00:05,480
and lying charges him and just hugs him, and yeah,

1337
01:00:05,920 --> 01:00:08,000
exactly what I expect, Like, that's what I expect. You

1338
01:00:08,039 --> 01:00:10,880
hope you don't want him to tear you apart.

1339
01:00:11,159 --> 01:00:12,599
Speaker 1: Hippo meat's hard to find, guys.

1340
01:00:12,960 --> 01:00:15,440
Speaker 2: It might be might have to. I imagine it's probably

1341
01:00:15,480 --> 01:00:17,119
illegal after what we're about to hear.

1342
01:00:18,480 --> 01:00:22,079
Speaker 1: Uh, well it's not illegal. I don't know so anyway,

1343
01:00:22,199 --> 01:00:25,480
So to this guy was just like a fucking scam artist.

1344
01:00:25,519 --> 01:00:27,159
Speaker 2: So, oh, you know who can get us hippo meat?

1345
01:00:27,159 --> 01:00:33,519
Probably who Christina's boyfriend Jesse. Oh he could, he really could. Yeah,

1346
01:00:33,960 --> 01:00:35,239
South African.

1347
01:00:35,440 --> 01:00:39,159
Speaker 1: Christina get Jesse on the line with us.

1348
01:00:39,280 --> 01:00:42,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean he used to do some hunts for

1349
01:00:43,199 --> 01:00:46,119
Saudi Princess, Saudi Princess, so I'd imagine he has a

1350
01:00:46,400 --> 01:00:47,119
hippoc connect.

1351
01:00:47,280 --> 01:00:49,519
Speaker 1: This is gonna be a really bad rabbil hole for me,

1352
01:00:49,599 --> 01:00:54,880
guys the exotic meat market. Yeah, well, go on, Uh

1353
01:00:54,880 --> 01:00:55,480
where was I?

1354
01:00:55,519 --> 01:00:55,840
Speaker 2: Okay?

1355
01:00:55,880 --> 01:00:59,360
Speaker 1: So fucking Ducane essentially was like he was a scam

1356
01:00:59,440 --> 01:01:00,960
artist and he want to make money off of other

1357
01:01:00,960 --> 01:01:04,920
famous people. So he started writing a syndicated column talking

1358
01:01:04,960 --> 01:01:07,800
about like what Teddy Roosevelt hunt was gonna entail and

1359
01:01:07,840 --> 01:01:10,079
all this stuff and blah blah blah. But then when

1360
01:01:10,079 --> 01:01:12,440
that column started to not do so well, he got

1361
01:01:12,440 --> 01:01:15,760
boring or whatever, he pivoted to making fun of Teddy

1362
01:01:15,840 --> 01:01:18,440
Roosevelt and calling him a phony ass hunter. Oh no,

1363
01:01:18,480 --> 01:01:21,639
it's a little fucking carpetbagger or whatever the fuck, like

1364
01:01:21,639 --> 01:01:24,599
like a fancy boy. Yeah who the Africans were doing

1365
01:01:24,599 --> 01:01:27,960
the real hunting for him, Oh yeah, And he said

1366
01:01:27,960 --> 01:01:31,800
that I guess, uh, the Africans had given Roosevelt like

1367
01:01:31,840 --> 01:01:35,920
an honorary nickname or name or whatever called and it

1368
01:01:35,960 --> 01:01:38,719
was it was called Buana Tumbo, And Ducane told the

1369
01:01:38,719 --> 01:01:41,920
press that meant mister unusually large stomach. Is that where

1370
01:01:41,960 --> 01:01:45,000
tumbo buana tumbo? I don't think so, okay, but I

1371
01:01:45,039 --> 01:01:48,559
just think he was just being a dick. Kine also

1372
01:01:48,639 --> 01:01:51,480
wrote that as Roosevelt was getting ready to return in

1373
01:01:51,559 --> 01:01:54,599
nineteen ten to America, du Kane announced that he believed,

1374
01:01:54,960 --> 01:01:57,480
based on what I don't know, believe that the former

1375
01:01:57,519 --> 01:02:01,159
president might have contracted a deadly still dormant disease and

1376
01:02:01,159 --> 01:02:03,760
should not be allowed back in the country. Press hasn't

1377
01:02:03,800 --> 01:02:08,639
changed a much. Nah, Yeah, not really, uh so. Douqueane, though,

1378
01:02:08,639 --> 01:02:11,440
assured Congress that hippos tasted great, and we're super easy

1379
01:02:11,480 --> 01:02:15,519
to domesticate. Okay, so we're talking pet hippos or ranch

1380
01:02:15,559 --> 01:02:19,360
hippos probably, yeah, but yeah, but it was hot belly hippo. Yeah,

1381
01:02:19,360 --> 01:02:21,920
that's just a guinea pig. Yeah. He was just like, yeah, no,

1382
01:02:21,960 --> 01:02:24,400
they're super easy to handle. And then when asked if

1383
01:02:24,440 --> 01:02:27,559
hippos were dangerous, he said absolutely not. They're safe as

1384
01:02:27,559 --> 01:02:29,920
fuck me. Yeah, look at it, he said, you could

1385
01:02:29,920 --> 01:02:32,079
walk young ones around on a leash like a fat dog.

1386
01:02:34,639 --> 01:02:35,599
Speaker 2: That'd be kind of sick.

1387
01:02:35,800 --> 01:02:36,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, it would be thick.

1388
01:02:37,000 --> 01:02:39,159
Speaker 2: It's a lie, but it wouldn't you know.

1389
01:02:39,199 --> 01:02:41,880
Speaker 1: He chicks he'd get at first with a hippo, like.

1390
01:02:41,840 --> 01:02:43,480
Speaker 2: An infant hippo, mate, you know what I mean.

1391
01:02:43,840 --> 01:02:46,519
Speaker 1: Oh, then it's like four years later you have just

1392
01:02:46,559 --> 01:02:48,960
an entire wing of your house dedicated to keeping this

1393
01:02:49,039 --> 01:02:49,440
thing around.

1394
01:02:49,440 --> 01:02:50,320
Speaker 2: Fucking wing God.

1395
01:02:50,400 --> 01:02:53,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, and there's bones of several women that thought it

1396
01:02:53,320 --> 01:02:54,360
was adorable in your house.

1397
01:02:54,440 --> 01:02:55,159
Speaker 2: Easy breakup.

1398
01:02:55,320 --> 01:02:57,679
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, we will go swim with a hippo.

1399
01:02:58,400 --> 01:02:58,599
Speaker 2: Uh.

1400
01:02:58,679 --> 01:03:01,440
Speaker 1: The papers were more hyped than ever after this congressional hearing,

1401
01:03:02,239 --> 01:03:05,159
and they were also conspiculously presenting the news in a

1402
01:03:05,199 --> 01:03:09,360
way that favored the plan. The Chicago Tribune, in particular,

1403
01:03:10,559 --> 01:03:13,800
put their coverage of the proceedings right next to a

1404
01:03:13,840 --> 01:03:18,159
column about how Delmonico's, the famous steakhouse, had been forced

1405
01:03:18,159 --> 01:03:20,239
to raise the price of everything on its menu.

1406
01:03:20,440 --> 01:03:24,239
Speaker 2: Yeah. Interesting, one right next to the other. Like that.

1407
01:03:25,000 --> 01:03:26,320
It's almost like there was an agenda.

1408
01:03:26,440 --> 01:03:28,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's almost like the press hasn't changed.

1409
01:03:28,599 --> 01:03:28,800
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1410
01:03:29,800 --> 01:03:33,159
Speaker 1: They also presented it as an anti monopoly move, which

1411
01:03:33,159 --> 01:03:35,159
it which it kind of was, and it was a

1412
01:03:35,199 --> 01:03:40,480
hot topic at the time. The like there was something

1413
01:03:40,480 --> 01:03:42,880
called the Meat Trust. There was a real monopoly problem

1414
01:03:42,960 --> 01:03:46,840
with meat. It was like five or six companies that

1415
01:03:47,079 --> 01:03:51,920
essentially ran the entire meat packing, raising everything industry. Teddy

1416
01:03:52,000 --> 01:03:54,000
Rooseved actually took on the Meat Trust when he was present.

1417
01:03:54,079 --> 01:03:55,800
Speaker 2: I was about to say, he's about to bust them up.

1418
01:03:55,920 --> 01:03:58,039
Speaker 1: Yeah, he busted that trust as best he could, but

1419
01:03:58,039 --> 01:03:58,719
it was still there.

1420
01:03:59,239 --> 01:03:59,400
Speaker 2: Uh.

1421
01:04:00,280 --> 01:04:03,840
Speaker 1: Also, based on basically fucking nothing other than that, they

1422
01:04:03,840 --> 01:04:09,079
were really into this idea argued that hippos, unlike cows,

1423
01:04:09,960 --> 01:04:12,239
they'd be too heavy to put on trains and ship

1424
01:04:12,320 --> 01:04:13,840
to Chicago slaughter houses.

1425
01:04:14,199 --> 01:04:16,280
Speaker 2: Mmmm, that's a problem.

1426
01:04:16,480 --> 01:04:18,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, so there would have to be tons of mom

1427
01:04:18,360 --> 01:04:22,239
and pop slaughterhouses that sprung up around the hippo ranches. Yeah,

1428
01:04:22,239 --> 01:04:25,480
that's staking the small economy. Yeah, small business stuff. Literally,

1429
01:04:26,519 --> 01:04:29,800
obviously that's not true. No, it's completely made up be

1430
01:04:29,840 --> 01:04:34,480
Procter and Gamble. Hippo. It's just, of course heavier ship

1431
01:04:34,519 --> 01:04:37,559
than hippos goes on trains all the fucking time. Yeah,

1432
01:04:37,639 --> 01:04:39,760
a hippo doesn't way more than a train, so obviously

1433
01:04:39,760 --> 01:04:41,679
the train. But they were just like, well, it'd be

1434
01:04:41,719 --> 01:04:43,719
too hard to transport it.

1435
01:04:43,800 --> 01:04:44,760
Speaker 2: It was like literally just.

1436
01:04:44,719 --> 01:04:47,039
Speaker 1: Making up a point to support the fact there would

1437
01:04:47,079 --> 01:04:49,360
just be less hippos moved than cows. It's just not

1438
01:04:49,400 --> 01:04:52,440
it's a volume issue. Or it would want more train jobs.

1439
01:04:53,239 --> 01:04:55,239
You have to put more cars or more trained.

1440
01:04:55,000 --> 01:04:59,480
Speaker 2: Guys, I hear nothing wrong with hippop What happened?

1441
01:04:59,599 --> 01:05:02,639
Speaker 1: Yeah, basically not much.

1442
01:05:03,280 --> 01:05:06,960
Speaker 2: We forgot. I could see that being it we remember,

1443
01:05:08,119 --> 01:05:09,280
uh kind of?

1444
01:05:09,559 --> 01:05:11,960
Speaker 1: So headlines, by the way read are about this.

1445
01:05:12,880 --> 01:05:15,280
Speaker 2: Should we make a push to bring back hippo meet? Yeah?

1446
01:05:15,280 --> 01:05:19,039
Speaker 1: I think so. My My hypothetical title for this was

1447
01:05:19,239 --> 01:05:22,079
is a hippo It's what should have been for dinner?

1448
01:05:23,000 --> 01:05:24,000
Oh like the poor thing?

1449
01:05:24,559 --> 01:05:24,880
Speaker 2: Beef?

1450
01:05:25,119 --> 01:05:29,719
Speaker 1: Oh beef is the other way meet? That's right, But

1451
01:05:29,800 --> 01:05:34,039
the idea failed by one vote.

1452
01:05:34,480 --> 01:05:35,119
Speaker 2: Who did it?

1453
01:05:35,440 --> 01:05:38,400
Speaker 1: I don't know, but we were one vote away from

1454
01:05:38,519 --> 01:05:44,719
hippos being moved into the southeastern United States. It's probably

1455
01:05:44,800 --> 01:05:45,400
strong Therman.

1456
01:05:45,960 --> 01:05:50,119
Speaker 2: Why couldn't have been like a state's rights issue? Right? Well, no,

1457
01:05:50,360 --> 01:05:51,360
you could have still done it.

1458
01:05:51,400 --> 01:05:54,400
Speaker 1: But the bill was calling for two hundred and fifty

1459
01:05:54,400 --> 01:05:56,920
thousand dollars from the federal government. Yeah, it didn't make

1460
01:05:57,000 --> 01:05:59,639
hippos illegal. It didn't do anything. It's right, this didn't

1461
01:05:59,639 --> 01:06:01,480
get a move to ship hippos over the But they.

1462
01:06:01,360 --> 01:06:02,840
Speaker 2: Should have just done it.

1463
01:06:02,840 --> 01:06:05,599
Speaker 1: It was a stimulus bill, right, they could have done

1464
01:06:05,599 --> 01:06:06,000
it anyway.

1465
01:06:06,119 --> 01:06:07,559
Speaker 2: Just they do it on the state's level.

1466
01:06:07,599 --> 01:06:09,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, they could have just done anyway, but they didn't.

1467
01:06:09,679 --> 01:06:09,800
Speaker 2: Uh.

1468
01:06:09,920 --> 01:06:14,079
Speaker 1: And eventually we solved the meat problem through fun solutions

1469
01:06:14,159 --> 01:06:17,079
like factory farming and turning land that wasn't meant for

1470
01:06:17,119 --> 01:06:20,079
grazing into grazing land and just eating up more of

1471
01:06:20,079 --> 01:06:22,519
that ship. Hippos probably would have been more environmentally friendly.

1472
01:06:24,000 --> 01:06:27,039
In the hippos have their own environmental problems, like they

1473
01:06:27,159 --> 01:06:29,920
did get so much that it fucks up rivers and oh,

1474
01:06:30,079 --> 01:06:31,639
actually that would have been really bad for us. I'm

1475
01:06:31,639 --> 01:06:34,159
glad we didn't do that. Yeah, the African rivers, the

1476
01:06:34,199 --> 01:06:36,400
rivers that are used to it have water problems all

1477
01:06:36,440 --> 01:06:38,079
the time because of how much hippos ship.

1478
01:06:38,519 --> 01:06:40,760
Speaker 2: The sea is red with hippo shit and blood.

1479
01:06:41,400 --> 01:06:46,519
Speaker 1: All every hippo has ibs too, I'm assuming yeah, see everything.

1480
01:06:46,599 --> 01:06:50,679
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh no, maybe they clean up the rivers.

1481
01:06:51,760 --> 01:06:53,440
Speaker 1: No, actually so at the Saint Louis Zoo has a

1482
01:06:53,480 --> 01:06:58,679
really cool hippo area and they stocked the hippo cages

1483
01:06:59,239 --> 01:07:01,800
or the hippo pool not only with the hippos obviously,

1484
01:07:02,280 --> 01:07:04,840
but with all the fish from Africa. They eat their ship.

1485
01:07:05,400 --> 01:07:09,880
Speaker 2: And trash, huh and trash they just feed the hippos trash.

1486
01:07:10,159 --> 01:07:11,679
Speaker 1: They feed them like pumpkins and I don't know what

1487
01:07:11,679 --> 01:07:13,599
they feed them, you know, a bunch of just big things.

1488
01:07:13,880 --> 01:07:15,400
But they hit they like literally they have a whole

1489
01:07:15,400 --> 01:07:17,599
thing and like you can sit next to high school.

1490
01:07:17,599 --> 01:07:18,280
Speaker 2: One time, I just.

1491
01:07:18,239 --> 01:07:19,599
Speaker 1: We went there. We had like a day off of

1492
01:07:19,639 --> 01:07:21,760
school and we all got really fucking high and just

1493
01:07:21,760 --> 01:07:23,760
went to the zoo, which is glorious.

1494
01:07:23,880 --> 01:07:24,840
Speaker 2: I've went.

1495
01:07:25,280 --> 01:07:27,880
Speaker 1: I've never been to a zoo high, but the aquarium

1496
01:07:27,960 --> 01:07:31,440
high top notch. Yeah, I mean same differ really.

1497
01:07:31,400 --> 01:07:35,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, Atlanta Aquarium. I've still high and drunk. I would

1498
01:07:35,719 --> 01:07:37,840
recommend drunk there.

1499
01:07:38,199 --> 01:07:39,239
Speaker 1: You see the whale shark or whatever.

1500
01:07:39,280 --> 01:07:42,079
Speaker 2: Wouldn't You wouldn't be drunk there at an aquarium? Yeah,

1501
01:07:42,119 --> 01:07:44,280
what's gonna go wrong? Yeah? I mean the drinks were

1502
01:07:44,280 --> 01:07:48,119
actually pretty I remember them being pretty, like decently priced.

1503
01:07:48,159 --> 01:07:50,960
Oh they sold booze out the aquarium. Fuck, yeah, why

1504
01:07:50,960 --> 01:07:53,679
wouldn't they? They sell booze at the zoo. Yeah, I

1505
01:07:53,679 --> 01:07:53,960
don't know.

1506
01:07:54,039 --> 01:07:57,280
Speaker 1: The zoo feels more right because it's outside the aquarium.

1507
01:07:57,280 --> 01:07:58,960
Feels like selling booze at a library.

1508
01:08:00,639 --> 01:08:03,559
Speaker 2: You think someone's gonna crack the tanks.

1509
01:08:03,599 --> 01:08:07,159
Speaker 1: Hot jump in, don't you get enough frat socials had

1510
01:08:07,199 --> 01:08:08,639
a aquarium.

1511
01:08:09,039 --> 01:08:10,000
Speaker 2: Had a dolphin shill.

1512
01:08:10,039 --> 01:08:11,960
Speaker 1: I remember that was an episode of exec Board that

1513
01:08:12,000 --> 01:08:14,440
I actually didn't I had an idea for it, but

1514
01:08:14,440 --> 01:08:15,599
I was like, I don't know how we would ever

1515
01:08:15,599 --> 01:08:16,119
do it?

1516
01:08:16,239 --> 01:08:16,760
Speaker 2: Was it they had?

1517
01:08:16,960 --> 01:08:19,880
Speaker 1: They had their formal at the zoo, and things went

1518
01:08:20,600 --> 01:08:24,319
obviously horrifically wrong the wedding before mine, at the venue

1519
01:08:24,359 --> 01:08:27,039
we were at, people poured like beer into the fucking

1520
01:08:27,079 --> 01:08:28,720
turtle thing. Oh yeah, you told me that.

1521
01:08:28,800 --> 01:08:29,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was bad.

1522
01:08:29,800 --> 01:08:31,800
Speaker 1: Fucking idiots. I know, a bunch of assholes.

1523
01:08:31,800 --> 01:08:36,680
Speaker 2: Man. I did my community service when I got a

1524
01:08:36,720 --> 01:08:40,600
pissing in public ticket for UCF. I did fifty hours

1525
01:08:40,600 --> 01:08:44,880
at the Sandford Zooo.

1526
01:08:44,920 --> 01:08:46,359
Speaker 1: Pretty close to being a sex offender.

1527
01:08:47,279 --> 01:08:50,399
Speaker 2: No, I had to write like a five thousand word

1528
01:08:50,560 --> 01:08:52,800
essay on why you shouldn't piss in public.

1529
01:08:52,800 --> 01:08:56,039
Speaker 1: Because it's a child, because that broke the golden rule

1530
01:08:58,159 --> 01:08:59,920
doing to others what you want them to yourself.

1531
01:09:00,119 --> 01:09:03,319
Speaker 2: I guess I don't care if ucfs like conduct policy. Yeah,

1532
01:09:03,359 --> 01:09:05,840
I wouldn't care. I never actually got like in trouble

1533
01:09:05,840 --> 01:09:09,159
with the actual law. It was just the UCF student

1534
01:09:09,199 --> 01:09:10,199
guidelines or something.

1535
01:09:10,279 --> 01:09:11,359
Speaker 1: Oh that's even worse.

1536
01:09:11,680 --> 01:09:12,960
Speaker 2: So I had to write an essay and do fifty

1537
01:09:13,000 --> 01:09:15,199
hour community service and I did. I just cleaned it,

1538
01:09:15,399 --> 01:09:18,920
or I cleaned turtle cages. That is zoo. You pick

1539
01:09:19,000 --> 01:09:23,279
up turtle shit, giant like, let us just giant turtles. Yeah,

1540
01:09:23,359 --> 01:09:26,399
like tortoises. Yeah, that's cool. San francis not bad.

1541
01:09:26,520 --> 01:09:28,960
Speaker 1: But yeah, eventually, we, like I said, solve the problem

1542
01:09:29,039 --> 01:09:31,199
through factory farming and all kinds of fucked up shit.

1543
01:09:31,880 --> 01:09:37,479
And that is the story of how we almost became hippoeaters.

1544
01:09:38,000 --> 01:09:40,960
Speaker 2: We should run that bill back. I agree. Yeah, I

1545
01:09:40,960 --> 01:09:44,600
don't see why not where we place them though not Louisiana.

1546
01:09:45,039 --> 01:09:46,960
Why not? Louisiana's great for that.

1547
01:09:46,960 --> 01:09:49,000
Speaker 1: That's probably the perfect Actually, you put them in the

1548
01:09:49,000 --> 01:09:51,359
Everglades and let them eat all the pythons. Then you

1549
01:09:51,399 --> 01:09:54,079
just have a hippop That's see. The problem is none

1550
01:09:54,079 --> 01:09:55,840
of that Evergladesh. It's really that big of a deal.

1551
01:09:55,920 --> 01:09:59,560
It's that we keep developing closer and closer to the Everglades. Yeah, like, oh,

1552
01:09:59,560 --> 01:10:01,640
there's paters in my house. It's like, yeah, you live

1553
01:10:01,680 --> 01:10:03,520
by the largest bit of them.

1554
01:10:03,920 --> 01:10:08,000
Speaker 2: Like, what are you doing? I looped at the ship? Yeah,

1555
01:10:08,520 --> 01:10:11,880
cancel each other out. Yeah, although when I was in Florida.

1556
01:10:12,399 --> 01:10:15,199
When you paddle board or kayak, gators kind of leave

1557
01:10:15,239 --> 01:10:16,600
you alone. I don't think a hippo would.

1558
01:10:16,760 --> 01:10:20,760
Speaker 1: No, No hippos like that's moving food. Yeah, well it's

1559
01:10:20,800 --> 01:10:24,560
just pissed off you're near it mm hmm. And when

1560
01:10:24,600 --> 01:10:26,840
you're that big, what isn't you're a hippo. Yeah, and

1561
01:10:26,880 --> 01:10:30,119
it's I feel like you know reptiles are. They're they're

1562
01:10:30,159 --> 01:10:33,760
more conservative with their energy. Yeah, well they they're cold blooded.

1563
01:10:33,760 --> 01:10:34,159
Speaker 2: They have to be.

1564
01:10:34,199 --> 01:10:36,640
Speaker 1: They have to be like they're not just warm blood,

1565
01:10:36,800 --> 01:10:42,479
hot blooded they'll funk around. So yeah, that's all.

1566
01:10:42,520 --> 01:10:43,960
Speaker 2: I got what you learn today.

1567
01:10:44,920 --> 01:10:48,439
Speaker 1: We blew it that I really want hippo mate, I

1568
01:10:48,439 --> 01:10:49,840
want to try some hipp I want to eat it

1569
01:10:49,880 --> 01:10:50,760
to hippo brisket.

1570
01:10:51,079 --> 01:10:53,039
Speaker 2: And that means I'm in the game.

1571
01:10:53,600 --> 01:10:56,279
Speaker 1: Mm I think we are. We are all in the

1572
01:10:56,319 --> 01:11:00,079
hippo game. What if that became like the thing that

1573
01:11:00,159 --> 01:11:04,000
got us all rich, We became the hippo magnates of

1574
01:11:05,079 --> 01:11:06,000
the Southern US.

1575
01:11:06,159 --> 01:11:07,640
Speaker 2: I don't think anyone else is trying it.

1576
01:11:07,760 --> 01:11:11,680
Speaker 1: No hippo barbecue mm yeah, oh yeah.

1577
01:11:11,840 --> 01:11:13,520
Speaker 2: Kind of run this back, dude.

1578
01:11:13,720 --> 01:11:17,640
Speaker 1: Get Franklin to just like Aaron Franklin just the it's

1579
01:11:17,680 --> 01:11:21,680
popular in Africa and it's considered a delicacy. It can

1580
01:11:21,680 --> 01:11:23,479
be grilled, roasted out and open fire.

1581
01:11:24,000 --> 01:11:25,720
Speaker 2: I guarantee you can get a ship here.

1582
01:11:27,119 --> 01:11:27,760
Speaker 1: You can get anything.

1583
01:11:27,880 --> 01:11:29,960
Speaker 2: Let's just get like a couple of pounds of hippo meat.

1584
01:11:30,000 --> 01:11:32,039
Try it ourselves and see what happens.

1585
01:11:32,359 --> 01:11:34,880
Speaker 1: Do a little test kitchen action. Try like do one

1586
01:11:34,880 --> 01:11:38,039
on a smoker, maybe like one souvd and.

1587
01:11:38,039 --> 01:11:40,119
Speaker 2: Hippos, and then we pitched its all the barbecue spots

1588
01:11:40,119 --> 01:11:43,279
in Austin. We're like the middleman. Yeah, we got the

1589
01:11:43,359 --> 01:11:46,600
hippo connect. We're the hippo plug. Yeah.

1590
01:11:46,640 --> 01:11:49,760
Speaker 1: So each hippo, from an average sized hippo, you can

1591
01:11:49,760 --> 01:11:51,479
get twelve hundred pounds of edible meat.

1592
01:11:51,560 --> 01:11:53,640
Speaker 2: Holy shit, they're giants.

1593
01:11:53,680 --> 01:11:54,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're big.

1594
01:11:54,520 --> 01:11:56,119
Speaker 2: They're the size of vehicles.

1595
01:11:56,239 --> 01:11:58,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know. I guess it's just like I think

1596
01:11:58,479 --> 01:12:00,479
of their stumpy legs and stuff on, Like I'm probably

1597
01:12:00,520 --> 01:12:02,479
not eating that, but maybe you are, Like maybe hippo

1598
01:12:02,600 --> 01:12:05,520
like's good. I think hippo might be really good, and

1599
01:12:05,560 --> 01:12:07,119
we might need to go to Africa and eat hippo.

1600
01:12:08,520 --> 01:12:10,119
We'll put it, well, we'll try to work that in

1601
01:12:10,119 --> 01:12:10,520
the budget.

1602
01:12:10,600 --> 01:12:12,840
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, we'll see if we can fit that in

1603
01:12:12,880 --> 01:12:13,319
the schedule.

1604
01:12:13,359 --> 01:12:15,479
Speaker 1: We'll see what we can do. I just look lonesome, dove.

1605
01:12:15,520 --> 01:12:18,880
If you're listening, get some hippo hippo steak immediately. We'll

1606
01:12:18,920 --> 01:12:21,560
be your first customer. That's all I got. So for

1607
01:12:21,800 --> 01:12:23,880
Dan and Jake, I'm rob.

1608
01:12:24,039 --> 01:12:25,079
Speaker 2: You just got soft served.