WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>Section eleven of nineteen eighty four by George Orwell. This

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<v Speaker 1>Leagamis recording may be freely distributed and adapted for any purpose.

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<v Speaker 1>Part two, Chapter three. We can come here once again,

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<v Speaker 1>said Julia. It's generally safe to use any hide out twice,

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<v Speaker 1>but not for another month or two. Of course, as

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<v Speaker 1>soon as she woke up, her demeanor had changed. She

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<v Speaker 1>became alert and business like, put her clothes on, knotted

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<v Speaker 1>the scarlet sash about her waist, and began arranging the

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<v Speaker 1>details of the journey home. It seemed natural to leave

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<v Speaker 1>this to her. She obviously had a practical cunning which

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<v Speaker 1>Winston lacked, and she seemed also to have an exhaustive

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<v Speaker 1>knowledge of the country side round London, stored away from

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<v Speaker 1>innumerable community hikes. The route she gave him was quite

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<v Speaker 1>different from the one by which he had come, and

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<v Speaker 1>brought him out at a different railway station. Never go

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<v Speaker 1>home the same way as you went out, she said,

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<v Speaker 1>as though enunciating an important general principle. She would leave first,

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<v Speaker 1>and Winston was to wait half an hour before following her.

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<v Speaker 1>She had named a place where they could meet after

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<v Speaker 1>work four evenings. Hence, it was a street in one

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<v Speaker 1>of the poorer quarters, where there was an open market,

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<v Speaker 1>which was generally crowded and noisy. She would be hanging

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<v Speaker 1>about among the stalls, pretending to be in search of

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<v Speaker 1>shoelaces or sewing thread. If she judged that the coast

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<v Speaker 1>was clear, she would blow her nose when he approached. Otherwise,

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<v Speaker 1>he was to walk past her without recognition. But with

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<v Speaker 1>luck in the middle of the crowd, it would be

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<v Speaker 1>safe to talk for a quarter of an hour and

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<v Speaker 1>arrange another meeting. And now I must go, she said,

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<v Speaker 1>as soon as he had mastered his instructions. I'm due

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<v Speaker 1>back at nineteen thirty. I've got to put in two

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<v Speaker 1>hours for the Junior Antisex League, handing out leaflets or something,

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<v Speaker 1>isn't it bloody? Give me a brush down, would you have?

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<v Speaker 1>I got any twigs in my hair? Are you sure? Then? Goodbye,

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<v Speaker 1>my love, good bye. She flung herself into his arms,

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<v Speaker 1>kissed him almost violently, and a moment lay pushed her

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<v Speaker 1>way through the saplings and disappeared into the wood with

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<v Speaker 1>very little noise. Even now he had not found out

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<v Speaker 1>her surname or her address. However, it made no difference,

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<v Speaker 1>for it was inconceivable that they could ever meet indoors

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<v Speaker 1>or exchange any kind of written communication. As it happened,

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<v Speaker 1>they never went back to the clearing in the wood.

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<v Speaker 1>During the month of May. There was only one further

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<v Speaker 1>occasion on which they actually succeeded in making love. That

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<v Speaker 1>was in another hiding place, known to Julia, the belfry

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<v Speaker 1>of a ruinous church in an almost deserted stretch of

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<v Speaker 1>country where an atomic bomb had fallen thirty years earlier.

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<v Speaker 1>It was a good hiding place when once she got there,

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<v Speaker 1>but the getting there was very dangerous. For the rest

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<v Speaker 1>they could meet only in the streets, in a different

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<v Speaker 1>place every evening, and never for more than half an

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<v Speaker 1>hour at a time. In the street, it was usually

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<v Speaker 1>possible to talk after a fashion, as they drifted down

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<v Speaker 1>the crowded pavements, not quite abreast and never looking at

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<v Speaker 1>one another, they carried on a curious intermittent conversation which

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<v Speaker 1>flicked on and off like the beams of a lighthouse,

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<v Speaker 1>suddenly nipped into silence by the approach of a party

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<v Speaker 1>uniform or the proximity of a telescreen, then taken up

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<v Speaker 1>again minutes later in the middle of a sentence, then

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<v Speaker 1>abruptly cut short as they parted at the agreed spot,

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<v Speaker 1>then continued almost without introduction on the following day. Julia

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<v Speaker 1>appeared to be quite used to this kind of conversation,

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<v Speaker 1>which she called talking by installments. She was also surprisingly

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<v Speaker 1>adept at speaking without moving her lips. Just once in

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<v Speaker 1>almost a month of nightly meetings, they managed to exchange

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<v Speaker 1>a kiss. They were passing in silence down a side street.

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<v Speaker 1>Julia would never speak when they were away from the

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<v Speaker 1>main streets. When there was a deafening roar, the earth

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<v Speaker 1>heaved and the air darkened, and Winston found himself lying

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<v Speaker 1>on his side, bruised and terrified. A rocket bomb must

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<v Speaker 1>have dropped quite near at hand. Suddenly he became aware

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<v Speaker 1>of Julia's face, a few centimeters from his own, deathly white,

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<v Speaker 1>as white as chalk. Even her lips were white. She

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<v Speaker 1>was dead. He clasped her against him and found that

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<v Speaker 1>he was kissing a live, warm face, But there was

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<v Speaker 1>some powdery stuff that got in the way of his lips.

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<v Speaker 1>Both of their faces were thickly coated with plaster. There

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<v Speaker 1>were evenings when they reached their rendezvous and then had

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<v Speaker 1>to walk past one another without a sign because a

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<v Speaker 1>patrol had just come round the corner, or a helicopter

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<v Speaker 1>was hovering overhead. Even if it had been less dangerous,

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<v Speaker 1>it would still have been difficult to find time to meet.

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<v Speaker 1>Winston's working week was sixty hours, Julius was even longer,

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<v Speaker 1>and their three days varied according to the pressure of

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<v Speaker 1>work and did not often coincide. Julia, in any case,

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<v Speaker 1>seldom had an evening completely free. She spent an astonishing

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<v Speaker 1>amount of time in attending lectures and demonstrations, distributing literature

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<v Speaker 1>for the Junior Antisex League, preparing banners for Hate Week,

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<v Speaker 1>making collections for the Savings campaign, and such like activities.

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<v Speaker 1>It paid. She said, it was camouflage. If you kept

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<v Speaker 1>the small rules, you could break the big ones. She

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<v Speaker 1>even induced Winston to mortgage yet another of his evenings

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<v Speaker 1>by enrolling himself for the the part time munition work,

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<v Speaker 1>which was done voluntarily by zealous party members. So one

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<v Speaker 1>evening every week, Winston spent four hours of paralyzing boredom

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<v Speaker 1>screwing together small bits of metal which were probably parts

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<v Speaker 1>of bomb fuses in a drafty, ill lit workshop, where

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<v Speaker 1>the knocking of hammers mingled drearily with the music of

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<v Speaker 1>the telescreens. When they met in the church tower, the

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<v Speaker 1>gaps in their fragmentary conversation were filled up. It was

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<v Speaker 1>a blazing afternoon. The air in the little square chamber

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<v Speaker 1>above the bells was hot and stagnant, and smelt over

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<v Speaker 1>poweringly of pigeon dung. They sat talking for hours on

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<v Speaker 1>the dusty, twig littered floor, one or other of them

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<v Speaker 1>getting up from time to time to cast a glance

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<v Speaker 1>through the arrow slits and to make sure that no

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<v Speaker 1>one was coming. Julia was twenty six years old. She

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<v Speaker 1>lived in a hostel with thirty other girls. Always in

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<v Speaker 1>the stink of women. How I hate women, she said parenthetically.

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<v Speaker 1>And she worked, as he had guessed, on the novel

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<v Speaker 1>writing machines in the fiction department. She enjoyed her work,

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<v Speaker 1>which consisted chiefly in running and servicing a powerful but

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<v Speaker 1>tricky electric motor. She was not clever, but was fond

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<v Speaker 1>of using her hands, and felt at home with machinery.

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<v Speaker 1>She could describe the whole process of composing a novel

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<v Speaker 1>from the general directive issued by the planning committee, dant

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<v Speaker 1>of the final touching up by the rewrite squad, but

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<v Speaker 1>she was not interested in the finished product. She didn't

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<v Speaker 1>much care for reading. She said books were just a

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<v Speaker 1>commodity that had to be produced, like jam or boot lacers.

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<v Speaker 1>She had no memories of anything before the early sixties,

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<v Speaker 1>and the only person she had ever known who talked

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<v Speaker 1>frequently of the days before the revolution was a grandfather

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<v Speaker 1>who had disappeared when she was eight. At school, she

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<v Speaker 1>had been captain of the hockey team and had won

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<v Speaker 1>the gymnastics trophy two years running. She had been a

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<v Speaker 1>troop leader in the Spies and a branch secretary in

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<v Speaker 1>the youth league before joining the Junior Antisex League. She

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<v Speaker 1>had always borne an excellent character. She had even an

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<v Speaker 1>infallible mark of good reputation. Been picked out to work

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<v Speaker 1>in porno, the sub section of the fiction department which

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<v Speaker 1>turned out cheap pornography for distribution among the proles. It

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<v Speaker 1>was nicknamed muck House by the people who worked in it.

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<v Speaker 1>She remarked there she had remained for a year, helping

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<v Speaker 1>to produce booklets in sealed packets with titles like Spanking

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<v Speaker 1>Stories or One Night in a Girl's School, to be

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<v Speaker 1>bought furtively by proletarian youths who were under the impression

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<v Speaker 1>that they were buying something illegal. What are these books like,

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<v Speaker 1>said Winston curiously. Oh, ghastly rubbish. They're boring. Really, they

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<v Speaker 1>only have six plots, but they swap them round a bit.

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<v Speaker 1>Of course. I was only on the kaleidoscopes. I was

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<v Speaker 1>never in the rewrite squad. I'm not literary, dear, not

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<v Speaker 1>even enough for that. He learned with astonishment that all

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<v Speaker 1>the workers in Porno sec except the heads of the departments,

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<v Speaker 1>were girls. The theory was that men whose sex instincts

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<v Speaker 1>were less controllable than those of women were in greater

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<v Speaker 1>danger of being corrupted by the filth they handled. They

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<v Speaker 1>don't even like having married women there, she added. Girls

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<v Speaker 1>are always supposed to be so pure. Here's one who

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<v Speaker 1>isn't anyway. She had had her first love affair when

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<v Speaker 1>she was sixteen, with a party member of sixty who

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<v Speaker 1>later committed suicide to avoid arrest. And a good job too,

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<v Speaker 1>said Julia, Otherwise they'd have had my name out of

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<v Speaker 1>him when he confessed. Since then, there had been various others. Life,

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<v Speaker 1>as she saw it, was quite simple. You wanted a

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<v Speaker 1>good time, they meaning the party, wanted to stop you

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<v Speaker 1>having it. You broke the rules as best you could.

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<v Speaker 1>She seemed to think it just as natural that they

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<v Speaker 1>should want to rob you of your pleasures as that

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<v Speaker 1>you should want to avoid being caught. She hated the Party,

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<v Speaker 1>and said so in the crudest words, but she made

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<v Speaker 1>no general criticism of it, except where it touched upon

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<v Speaker 1>her own life. She had no interest in party doctrine.

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<v Speaker 1>He noticed that she never used new speak words except

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<v Speaker 1>the ones that had passed into every day use. She

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<v Speaker 1>had never heard of the Brotherhood and refused to believe

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<v Speaker 1>in its existence. Any kind of organized revolter against the Party,

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<v Speaker 1>which was bound to be a failure, struck her as stupid.

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<v Speaker 1>The clever thing was to break the rules and stay

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<v Speaker 1>alive all the same. He wondered vaguely how many others

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<v Speaker 1>like her there might be in the younger generation, people

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<v Speaker 1>who had grown up in the world of the revolution,

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<v Speaker 1>knowing nothing else, accepting the Party as something unalterable, like

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<v Speaker 1>the sky, not rebelling against its authority, but simply evading

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<v Speaker 1>it as a rabbit, dodge as a dog. They did

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<v Speaker 1>not discuss the possibility of getting married. It was too

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<v Speaker 1>remote to be worth thinking about. No imaginable committee would

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<v Speaker 1>ever sanction such a marriage, even if Catherine Winston's wife

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<v Speaker 1>could somehow have been got rid of it was hopeless,

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<v Speaker 1>even as a day dream. What was she like your wife,

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<v Speaker 1>said Julia. She was Do you know the new speak

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<v Speaker 1>word good thinkful meaning naturally orthodox, incapable of thinking a

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<v Speaker 1>bad thought? No, I didn't know the word, but I

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<v Speaker 1>know the kind of person. Right enough, he began telling

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<v Speaker 1>her the story of his married life, but curiate enough,

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<v Speaker 1>she appeared to know the essential parts of it already.

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<v Speaker 1>She described to him, almost as though she had seen

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<v Speaker 1>or felt it, the stiffening of Catherine's body as soon

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<v Speaker 1>as he touched her, the way in which she still

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<v Speaker 1>seemed to be pushing him from her with all her strength,

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<v Speaker 1>even when her arms were clasped tightly around him. With Julia,

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<v Speaker 1>he felt no difficulty in talking about such things. Catherine,

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<v Speaker 1>in any case, had long ceased to be a painful

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<v Speaker 1>memory and became merely a distasteful one. I could have

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<v Speaker 1>stood it if it hadn't been for one thing, he said.

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<v Speaker 1>He told her about the frigid little ceremony that Catherine

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<v Speaker 1>had forced him to go through on the same night

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<v Speaker 1>every week. She hated it, but nothing would make her

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<v Speaker 1>stop doing it. She used to call it, but you'll

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<v Speaker 1>never guess our duty to the party, said Julia promptly,

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<v Speaker 1>How did you know that? I've been at school too, Dear,

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<v Speaker 1>Sex talks once a month for the over sixteens, and

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<v Speaker 1>in the youth movement they rub it into you for years.

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<v Speaker 1>I dare say it works in a lot of cases,

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<v Speaker 1>but of course you can never tell. People are such hypocrites.

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<v Speaker 1>She began to enlarge upon the subject. With Julia, everything

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<v Speaker 1>came back to her own sexuality. As soon as this

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<v Speaker 1>was touched upon in any way, she was capable of

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<v Speaker 1>great acuteness. Unlike Winston, she had grasped the inner meaning

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<v Speaker 1>of the party's sexual puritanism. It was not merely that

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<v Speaker 1>the sex instinct created a world of its own which

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<v Speaker 1>was outside the party's control, and which therefore had to

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<v Speaker 1>be destroyed if possible. What was more important was that

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<v Speaker 1>sexual privation induced hysteria, which was desirable because it could

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<v Speaker 1>be transformed into war fever and leader worship. The way

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<v Speaker 1>she put it was, when you make love, you're using

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<v Speaker 1>up energy, and afterwards you feel happy and don't give

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<v Speaker 1>a damn for anything. They can't bear you to feel

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<v Speaker 1>like that. They want you to be bursting with energy

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<v Speaker 1>all the time, all this marching up and down and

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<v Speaker 1>cheering and waving flags as simply sex gone sour. If

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<v Speaker 1>you are happy inside yourself, why should you get excited

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<v Speaker 1>about big brother and the three year plans and the

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<v Speaker 1>two minutes hate and all the rest of them. Bloody rot.

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<v Speaker 1>That was very true. He thought there was a direct

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<v Speaker 1>intimate connection between chastity and political orthodoxy. For how could

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<v Speaker 1>the fear, the hatred, and the lunatic credulity which the

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<v Speaker 1>party needed in its members be kept at the right

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<v Speaker 1>pitch except by bottling down some powerful instinct and using

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<v Speaker 1>it as a driving force. The sex impulse was dangerous

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<v Speaker 1>to the party, and the Party had turned it to account.

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<v Speaker 1>They had played a similar trick with the instinct of parenthood.

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<v Speaker 1>The family could not actually be abolished, and indeed people

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<v Speaker 1>were encouraged to be fond of their children in almost

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<v Speaker 1>the old fashioned way. The children, on the other hand,

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<v Speaker 1>were systematically turned against their parents and taught to spy

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<v Speaker 1>on them and report their deviations. The family had become,

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<v Speaker 1>in effect an extension of the thought police. It was

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<v Speaker 1>a device by means of which every one could be

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<v Speaker 1>surrounded night and day by informers who knew him intimately. Abruptly,

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<v Speaker 1>his mind went back to Catherine. Catherine would unquestionably have

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<v Speaker 1>denounced him to the thought police if she had not

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<v Speaker 1>happened to be too stupid to detect the unorthodoxy of

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<v Speaker 1>his opinions. But what really recalled her to him at

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<v Speaker 1>this moment was the stifling heat of the afternoon, which

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<v Speaker 1>had brought the sweat out on his forehead. He began

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<v Speaker 1>telling Julia of something that had happened, or rather had

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<v Speaker 1>failed to happen, on another sweltering summer afternoon eleven years ago.

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<v Speaker 1>It was three or four months after they were married.

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<v Speaker 1>They had lost their way on a community hike somewhere

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<v Speaker 1>in Kent. They had only lagged behind the others for

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<v Speaker 1>a couple of minutes, but they took a wrong turning

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<v Speaker 1>and presently found themselves pulled up short by the edge

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<v Speaker 1>of an old chalk quarry. It was a sheer drop

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<v Speaker 1>of ten or twenty meters with boulders at the bottom.

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<v Speaker 1>There was nobody of whom they could ask the way.

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<v Speaker 1>As soon as she realized that they were lost, Catherine

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<v Speaker 1>became very uneasy to be away from the noisy mob

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<v Speaker 1>of hikers. Even for a moment, gave her a feeling

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<v Speaker 1>of wrongdoing. She wanted to hurry back by the way

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<v Speaker 1>they had come and start searching in the other direction.

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<v Speaker 1>But at this moment Winston noticed some tufts of loose

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<v Speaker 1>strife growing in the cracks of the cliff beneath them.

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<v Speaker 1>One tuft was of two colors, magenta and brick red,

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<v Speaker 1>apparently growing on the same route. He had never seen

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<v Speaker 1>anything of the kind before, and he called to Catherine

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<v Speaker 1>to come and look at it. Look, Catherine, look at

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<v Speaker 1>those flowers that clumped down near the bottom. Do you

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<v Speaker 1>see there are two different colors. She had already turned

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<v Speaker 1>to go, but she did rather fretfully come back for

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<v Speaker 1>a moment. She even leaned out over the cliff face

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<v Speaker 1>to see where he was pointing. He was standing a

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<v Speaker 1>little behind her, and he put his hand on her

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<v Speaker 1>waist to steady her. At this moment, it suddenly occurred

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<v Speaker 1>to him how completely alone they were. There was not

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<v Speaker 1>a human creature anywhere, not a leaf stirring, not even

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<v Speaker 1>a bird awake. In a place like this, the danger

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<v Speaker 1>that there would be a hidden microphone was very small,

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<v Speaker 1>and even if there was a microphone, it would only

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<v Speaker 1>pick up sounds. It was the hottest, sleepiest hour of

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<v Speaker 1>the afternoon. The sun blazed down upon them. The sweat

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<v Speaker 1>tickled his face, and the thought struck him. Why didn't

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<v Speaker 1>you give her a good shove? Said Julia. I would have, Yes, dear,

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<v Speaker 1>you would have. I would if I had been the

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<v Speaker 1>same person then as I am now. Or perhaps I would.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not certain. Are you sorry you didn't? Yes? On

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<v Speaker 1>the whole, I'm sorry I didn't. They were sitting side

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<v Speaker 1>by side on the dusty floor. He pulled her closer

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<v Speaker 1>against him, her head rested on his shoulder, the pleasant

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<v Speaker 1>smell of her hair conquering the pigeon dung. She was

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<v Speaker 1>very young, he thought, she still expected something from life.

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<v Speaker 1>She did not understand that to push an inconvenient person

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<v Speaker 1>over a cliff solves nothing. Actually, it would have made

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<v Speaker 1>no difference, he said, then, why are you sorry? You

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<v Speaker 1>didn't do it? Only because I prefer a positive to

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<v Speaker 1>a negative. In this game that we're playing, we can't win.

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<v Speaker 1>Some kinds of failure are better than other kinds, That's all.

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<v Speaker 1>He felt. Her shoulders give a wriggle of descent. She

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<v Speaker 1>always contradicted him when he said anything of this. Kind,

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<v Speaker 1>She would not accept it as a law of nature

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<v Speaker 1>that the individual is always defeated. In a way, she

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<v Speaker 1>realized that she herself was doomed, that sooner or later

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<v Speaker 1>the thought police would catch her and kill her. But

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<v Speaker 1>with another part of her mind, she believed that it

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<v Speaker 1>was somehow possible to construct a secret world in which

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<v Speaker 1>you could live as you chose. All you needed was

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<v Speaker 1>luck and cunning and boldness. She did not understand that

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<v Speaker 1>there was no such thing as happiness, that the only

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<v Speaker 1>victory lay in the far future, long after you were dead,

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<v Speaker 1>that from the moment of declaring war on the party,

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<v Speaker 1>it was better to think of yourself as a corpse.

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<v Speaker 1>We are the dead, he said. We're not dead yet,

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<v Speaker 1>said Julia, prosaically, not physically. Six months, a year, five years, conceivably.

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<v Speaker 1>I am afraid of death. You are young, so presumably

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<v Speaker 1>you're more afraid of it than I am. Obviously, we

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<v Speaker 1>shall put it off as long as we can, but

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<v Speaker 1>it makes very little difference so long as human beings

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<v Speaker 1>stay human death and life are the same thing. Oh rubbish,

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<v Speaker 1>Which would you sooner sleep with me or a skeleton?

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<v Speaker 1>Don't you enjoy being alive? Don't you like feeling. This

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<v Speaker 1>is me, this is my hand, this is my leg.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm real, I'm solid, I'm alive. Don't you like this?

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<v Speaker 1>She twisted herself round and pressed her bosom against him.

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<v Speaker 1>He could feel her breasts ripe yet firm through her overalls.

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<v Speaker 1>Her body seemed to be pouring some of its youth

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<v Speaker 1>and vigor into his. Yes, I like that, he said.

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<v Speaker 1>Then stop talking about dying, and now listen, dear, we've

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<v Speaker 1>got to fix up about the next time we meet.

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<v Speaker 1>We may as well go back to the place in

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<v Speaker 1>the wood. We've given it a good long rest, but

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<v Speaker 1>you must get there by a different way this time.

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<v Speaker 1>I've got it all planned out. You take the train,

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<v Speaker 1>but look, I'll draw it out for you. And in

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<v Speaker 1>her practical way, she scraped together a small square of dust,

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<v Speaker 1>and with a twig from a pigeon's nest, began drawing

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<v Speaker 1>a map on the floor. End of Section eleven,