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Speaker 1: The best way to support this podcast is by going

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to patreon dot com slash softcore History, where each week

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you get two additional episodes on Wednesday and Friday. And

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at this point we have a three year evergreen back

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catalog of content that'll take you at least months to

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get through, So go ahead and check out Patreon dot

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com slash softcore History. Thank you. On today's episode of

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Softcore History, we're talking more mints.

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Speaker 2: And how it's a miracle they ever escaped Missouri.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about Bring Them Young specifically, and their journey

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west to Utah and why that was an.

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Speaker 2: Issue with the US government and how America's worst president

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ever somehow couldn't deal with a couple thousand creepy Colt

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Hill people.

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Speaker 1: We're talking, of course, about the Utah War. So sit back, relax,

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and listen about the real life American primeval.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to soft Core History.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to Softcore History. I'm your host Food Week damagester,

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joined as always by Rob Fox.

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Speaker 2: What's up?

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Speaker 1: Hey did early morning pod? I know?

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Speaker 2: Sick of working before noon. It's bullshit. I don't like it.

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I just want to be laying on my couch right

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now while my children play and are liked play with us.

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I'm like, no, I can't. I can't.

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Speaker 1: And we're joined again by the one and only mister America. Yeah,

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Scott Lopez, what's going on everybody.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's the first time I've woken up before noon

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in like a year. I'm doing great night shift. Dude,

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this is you have an excuse.

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Speaker 1: You're not like a open mic comedian.

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Speaker 2: Right, yeah, true, it's just like a piece of shit.

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He's like, yeah, it's my job. I go to open

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miccause I don't wake up before one o'clock. I do

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cocaine all night, so it's a living.

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Speaker 3: And then yeah, I do five mics and don't work

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on material. I'm garbage because I moved to Austin for

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KILTONI and had one shot and I bombed on that.

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But everyone wants to book me because I was on

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a podcast.

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Speaker 2: And then that what, dude, I want to like murder.

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I have to actively like say not interested in stand

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up clips on like Instagram and shit now because it's

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all just crowd work. And I'm like, you lazy piece

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of shit. Yep, tell a Jouke write a fucking joke.

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I can't stand it if you're if your fucking stand

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up Instagram page is like mostly crowd work, you suck

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in your garbage.

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Speaker 1: Isn't that to kind of keep your material secretive? Isn't

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that the idea?

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Speaker 2: I mean, just be writing constantly, write jokes. If your

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whole job is to write material, keep writing new material,

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don't you be? Like that's where you're from.

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Speaker 1: Old school comedians from like the eighties, like a dice

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he could get an hour, he'd have an hour of

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material and it would last him like two decades.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, true, yeah, yeah, but like still, it's just like

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it's so lazy. It's so lazy. I can't watched crowd

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works coast off it Baby, it's the dumbest ship.

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Speaker 1: Imagine if we had a crowd for the podcast.

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Speaker 2: I would hate that.

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Speaker 1: Like there's no topic today. We're just gonna be like

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you look like that.

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Speaker 3: You look like that, you sir, tell me history things right?

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Speaker 2: History is a mystery for you. Look like if if

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if Teddy Roosevelt was gig, I did it. That's kind

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of like all kill Tony or Tony Hinchcliff does. I

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feel like though, it's just every someone comes up and

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he's just like you look like a black guy be

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up there and be like, you look like if Michael

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Jordan was in the Holocaust, and then everyone was like,

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oh he said the Holocaust. It so eddric. Then a

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fat guy comes up and he's like, you look like

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you were at Auschwitz, but you ate everyone, and everyone's like.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's a spot on impression show.

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Speaker 2: Just like it's the teeth you look like you look

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like if you look like you were you guarded a concentration.

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Speaker 1: Can this show is really just about Rob Venton. Yeah,

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about anyone that's more successful than right now.

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Speaker 2: He's so angry, right he.

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Speaker 3: Woke up and shows violence.

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Speaker 1: Dude, Well today we're going to talk about people more

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successful than Rob.

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Speaker 2: Wow, could be anyone.

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Speaker 1: It's a it's an open wide fast.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, today we're talking about Merrimons. Okay, the Mormons because

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you watched the show, Yeah, American prime eval who hasn't

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watched it?

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Speaker 2: I have it yet. Actually I still need to watch it.

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Speaker 1: It's incredibly violent, so keep your kids away.

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Speaker 2: Is it like Bone Tomahawk level of violence?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Hell, I haven't seen Bone Tomahawk, but I imagine a

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dude gets scalped and survived.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Bone tomahawk goes hard.

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Speaker 1: It's pretty hard. Dudes are just catching arrows and bullets

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out of nowhere.

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Speaker 2: I love that.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, it's about bring them young. The Mormon Church,

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the Wild West.

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Speaker 2: Steve Young's great great grandfather. Yeah, NFL legend, Steve Young.

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We overlooked that quite a bit. Yeah, it really is odd.

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It's like, so you're the direct descendant of a cult

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leader whose cult is still quite successful.

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Speaker 1: They're bucking. Yeah, probably never better and honestly one of

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the better cults because every Mormon I've ever met incredibly nice.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, nice people, and they're good. They're smart religion. They're

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like Catholicism in that they just by by real estate,

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you know what I mean, And they and say what

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you want about the Mormons, great churches.

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Speaker 1: And low key. They run a lot of like local

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politics in Arizona, Utah. It's still in that West.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, that's why Trey Parker says he's obsessed with

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Mormon because there's like a million in Colorado, like a

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Utah is obviously the hub, but it you know, it

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spreads a little to the other.

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Speaker 1: And of course we have a common thread. We love Orlando.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you have that in common with them.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like Mormon Paradise. Yeah, Orlando, Florida, Disney.

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Speaker 2: I mean it's like I said before many times, there's

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a whole song and Book of Mormon about loving Orlando.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, they nail it, Yeah they do.

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Speaker 2: They know what they're talking they know what they're talking about.

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Speaker 1: But no, we're gonna talk about specifically their Utah settlement

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and the Utah War. Okay, in eighteen fifty seven and

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eighteen fifty.

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Speaker 2: Eight, Utah War against what the youths, the US government? Oh,

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against the US guy.

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Speaker 3: I think it was against everyone.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, there's whoever was in Utah. You just got murdered.

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Speaker 1: You could get it. Yeah yeah, yeah, you cross the Mormons,

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you could get it.

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Speaker 3: As soon as they got there. This is my land. Dude,

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They're like what.

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Speaker 2: I feel like, I already I don't know much about

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this war, but I feel like in general, the US

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government was probably like eventually like whatever, it's Utah, Like, yeah,

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they're not taking California, you know, like fuck it.

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Speaker 1: Some presidents were One president specifically was not. And it's actually, uh,

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his blunder, Buchanan's blunder.

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Speaker 2: This is Buchanan's blunder. Boy on a long list that's

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at the top.

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Speaker 1: James Buchanan has a long, long, just like CVS list

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of failures.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, just one after the.

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Speaker 1: Worst US president by far By Mile.

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Speaker 2: There's any any anyone like Joe Budden's worst.

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Speaker 1: President in history Nowald Trump's.

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Speaker 2: You are an unserious person if you believe that. Read

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a book, read a book, read a book. But uh it, yeah,

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he's suck It. Also just is funny to me like that. Uh,

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we don't know for sure, but he was probably gay

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and gay, but gay. He was a bachelor rob Yeah,

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confirmed bachelor.

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Speaker 1: Maybe he was just crushing Puss in the White House.

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Speaker 2: We don't know, we don't have those records.

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Speaker 1: Probably not Yeah, probably gay.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, but it's just funny like that. He'll never get.

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Speaker 1: Claimed, No, dude, he'll be a gay icon. Yeah, we

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should put that on the gaze. Yeah, like you ran

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the country once.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, if you're serious, and look what happens to a

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civil war. Yeah, it is just just dis honest though,

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like you could you're not being an honest person if

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you're not claim if you're like you want to like

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call Lincoln gay or something like you need to claim

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Buchanan or you're not being an honest.

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Speaker 1: Person, right. And also, Lincoln's not gay, He's not. He

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was just wrestling with his boys, you know. And those

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Lincoln log cabins.

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Speaker 3: Nothing's gay between the boys, dude. No, Not that you

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can do with the boys is ever gay.

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Speaker 1: No, Well bring him young and the Mormon sellers first

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set foot in Salt Lake Valley in July of eighteen

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forty seven, after seventeen turbulent years after the founder of

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the Church of Latter day Saints by Joseph Smith in

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New York. Mormon polygamy and behavior was uncouth for most

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American society, and they were treated as social prize. Chased

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off to the Rocky Mountain Wilderness from Missouri.

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Speaker 2: They tried to settle in Missouri, and we were like,

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get the fuck out.

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Speaker 1: Well, that's my next bullet point in here, you see.

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In eighteen thirty eight, Missouri Governor Lilburn Boggs issued Order

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forty four proclaiming the Mormons an enemy of the state

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then must be pushed out and exterminated all together, now,

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making it legal to kill anyone of the LDS on site.

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That law was in effect until nineteen seventy six.

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Speaker 3: The bogs dogs, dude. Yeah, just going out there killing people.

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Speaker 2: You don't want to ask my dad what he was

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doing in nineteen seventy five.

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Speaker 1: We gotta get Scalps.

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Speaker 2: We gotta get him while we can. But I wonder

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if this is probably easy to look up, but I'm

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not going to and who cares. But I wonder if

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Order forty four, because we were talking about Star Wars

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before this and General grievous to Order sixty six.

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Speaker 1: Yes, star Wars. You think that was the kind of

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influence for Star Wars for George Lucas he steals everything.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it makes sense. Yeah, come on now, Order

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forty four, Order sixty six going after a religious order?

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Speaker 3: Whoa Jedi is our religion?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 1: What what if Mormon's had Jedi powers?

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Speaker 3: All the more reason to kill them because you're scared.

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Speaker 1: That's why they're so powerful.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and think about it, they all live like obi

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Wan out in the fucking desert.

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Speaker 1: Huh. Can we just crack that Star Wars is actually

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about the Church of Latter Day States.

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Speaker 2: It's like, all right, it's Dune, but we'll throw Mormon

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in and what else. I don't know he really did.

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It's just such a ripoff.

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Speaker 1: Why don't Jedis have like twenty seven lives then?

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Speaker 2: I don't know. But they all fuck and they're not

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supposed to they're not supposed to write, Yeah, but they

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all do.

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Speaker 1: Joseph Smith and his followers set up shop in Illinois

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after being chased out of Missouri. A Mormon paper in

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their new settlement criticized leadership. This again, a guy in

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their own church criticized Joseph Smith and his leaders for

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polygamy as ungodly and that the church had gone a

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little too far from their roots. Their roots, which you know,

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it was like an eight year old religion at this point.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Joseph Smith didn't take kindly to this criticism, and he

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literally burned the press to the ground. State officials had

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to come in and arrest Smith and his brother for

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inciting a riot and acts of treason against the state

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of Illinois.

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Speaker 2: Now, can you still get treason against a state? Can

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you make treason against Nevada?

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Speaker 3: Like? I hope? So I want to find out.

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Speaker 2: I really want to find that out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I think if you go into the strip and

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just take the casinos for too much money, yeah, they

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charge you trees against Nevada.

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Speaker 2: We need to come up with a list of just

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like what gives you trees and for every state, you

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know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: I would choose like North Dakota because why would I

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ever go there. Yeah, you can probably just steal a

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bunch of cows and then that's treason enough, I think. Yeah,

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that's one of the states where there's more cows than people.

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So if you just take a bunch of cows, that's

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kind of all they got.

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Speaker 1: I believe all our missiles are up there too.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I'll be fine. Yeah, whatever they can't see me. Dude,

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I can wear like a poncho's are really good against

250
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thermals and stuff.

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Speaker 1: You start flying drones up in North Dakota. We doing

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up there?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, just a dronist, just a hobbyist.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, drone boy trying to get footage.

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Speaker 1: If your beautiful land.

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Speaker 2: In these silos, I'm gonna paint them.

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Speaker 1: They knew right away it was a lie. It's not

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beautiful land.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly. That guy's here to commit treason.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Specifically, during their transportation to prison, a local mob rises

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up in Both Joseph and his brother are gunned down

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before ever seeing their day in court. On June twenty seventh,

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eighteen forty four, a succession crisis for church leader arises

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in a certain sect splits off, but most except the

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leadership of Brother Bring Them Young.

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Speaker 2: And we did an episode on another sect.

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Speaker 1: August of fury four. I'm gonna get to it, okay,

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Young plan to move a group in April of eighteen

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forty six, but had to leave a little bit earlier

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in February to cross the cold Mississippi River when local

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Illinois and militia's forced them out by gunpoint. Yeah, like, hey,

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time to go pack up.

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Speaker 3: You're across that cold ass river right now.

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Speaker 1: Dude.

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Speaker 2: Fuck that. Although actually, I mean it depends on the year.

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It doesn't really do it anymore. But there's pictures from

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Saint Louis back in the day of the Missisippi River

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like frozen over and people just going out and walking

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on it and shit like that. I've never seen that.

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I would never do that.

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Speaker 1: Play hockey on the Mississippi River.

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Speaker 2: The ice is a little too jagged. It's like all

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these like like the ice flow just like jams up

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against each other and you can just kind of like

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walk out on that. It feels like an easy way

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to die.

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Speaker 1: Oh, they couldn't have like a mystery Alaska situation where

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they played the New York Rangers.

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Speaker 2: No, no, Now, the Blues aren't playing a pond game

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on the Mississippi River anytime soon to my knowledge. That

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would be sweet though, And they're just like, oh no, no, no,

293
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that to play it dead in the ice, like falling through.

294
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That's the hockey I would to watch.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, every sport should have the danger of dying.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, hockey's the closest. Hockey is the only

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sport where I've seen someone die on the ice. Football

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you still always happened.

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Speaker 1: But Teddy Roosevelt, Oh yeah, yeah, but that was a

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long time ago.

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Speaker 2: Hockey. That happened two years ago.

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Speaker 1: With well, I mean you have literal knives on your feet. Yeah,

303
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that fucking footage. I forget who the Florida Panther goalie was,

304
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but he has his throat slash. It still haunts me

305
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to this day.

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Speaker 3: And he like survived. He was so much blood it

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was crazy.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but everyone saw that clip.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's the word. I'd rather get tortured then get

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my throat slit.

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Speaker 1: That sounds terrible, That is honestly, I I do have

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a fear of getting my throat slit, Like, if I

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can go the rest of my life without that happening,

314
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that'd be ideal. I don't want to go out with

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my throat.

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Speaker 2: Have great news for you, probably gonna achieve that goal.

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Speaker 1: You can't promise me that I'm gonna go out violently

318
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and that might happen.

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Speaker 3: Okay, dude, you have to keep the beard forever now

320
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:02,679
as a dis protection.

321
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Speaker 1: So where's the neck? Where's the jug?

322
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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: I don't know. They might just find an easier way.

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Speaker 1: I also have to keep the beard forever because I

325
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have no chin at this point. Yeah, who knows what

326
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it looks like.

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Speaker 3: It could be glorious.

328
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Speaker 1: The thirteen hundred mile Mormon Trail took the church out

329
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of US territory into ungoverned Mexican land and gave hope

330
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to an isolation that would allow them to practice their

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religion in peace. What you was this was forty seven Okay,

332
00:15:31,919 --> 00:15:37,600
So yeah, well that was till a year later when

333
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the Treaty of Guadalupe Hidalgo, with the land that they

334
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set up shop on to get away from American persecution

335
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became property of the US.

336
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Speaker 2: Gilment, but By the way, they're doing this while the

337
00:15:50,679 --> 00:15:54,200
war's going on, so they had to know, like there's

338
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a decent chance this is America next year.

339
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Speaker 1: They're really cheering for the Mexican.

340
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Speaker 2: Literally like, oh please God, Mexico, pull it out.

341
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Speaker 1: Oh pull it out, because like Mexico doesn't even want

342
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to bother with us up there.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, they're like.

344
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Speaker 1: Too far out of reach.

345
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Speaker 2: I just really hoping Scott can't land his fleet march

346
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to Mexico City. Come on, man.

347
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Speaker 1: There's also a little thing that happens the same year

348
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that pops off the California gold rush in eighteen forty eight. Yep,

349
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even though bad timing for them.

350
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Speaker 2: Even though forty nine is I guess when everyone started

351
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moving out there.

352
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Speaker 1: I guess yeah, But if the forty eight is where

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they find gold, let's say the forty nine ers they

354
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go out, But forty eight is actually the year.

355
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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, so got a word's gotta spread, right, But

356
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I think the population influx wasn't forty nine, which is

357
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why people who moved there were the forty they're forty

358
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nine ers.

359
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Speaker 1: So a bunch of get rich quick bros passed through

360
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and calls quite a disturbance to the Mormon Church.

361
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Speaker 2: I feel like they could just make money off him

362
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:57,200
little waypoint. You know, here's more stuff, like.

363
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Speaker 1: A Jim Bridger would do that, yeah, at his at

364
00:17:00,799 --> 00:17:04,359
Fort Bridger. Okay, But the Mormons, they just wanted to

365
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practice their.

366
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Speaker 2: Little religion, just be left alone in the desert kind

367
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of to have they ought there. It's funny that they

368
00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:16,200
wanted to turn into hills have eyes people. They just

369
00:17:16,279 --> 00:17:19,039
kept trying to keep civilization away, like no, no, no,

370
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we want to live in the hills. We want to

371
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have what's going to eventually be incest if it's if

372
00:17:23,400 --> 00:17:25,799
it isn't already, just because there's so many wives, you're

373
00:17:25,839 --> 00:17:27,480
not gonna be banging your sister at one point.

374
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Speaker 1: I'm here to tell you the Mormon Church were actually

375
00:17:31,799 --> 00:17:33,839
the original libertarian party.

376
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Speaker 2: I guess kind of kind of just leave you alone

377
00:17:37,839 --> 00:17:41,039
to do whatever I want. Don't ask what it is. Yeah, yeah,

378
00:17:41,079 --> 00:17:45,160
there is such a thing as too libertarian, right, Like

379
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:48,160
I guess that just bleeds into anarchists eventually.

380
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Speaker 3: Or the sovereign citizen people.

381
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Speaker 2: With their navy flags and shit.

382
00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:53,559
Speaker 3: Yeah, the worst.

383
00:17:54,240 --> 00:17:57,119
Speaker 2: I don't even I don't even understand how broken your

384
00:17:57,119 --> 00:18:00,000
brain has to be to believe that, yeah, like you

385
00:18:00,119 --> 00:18:02,559
have to. It is funny too, because you'll just be

386
00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:05,640
like like someone who's like probably failed high school history,

387
00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:08,200
and then they're like, oh, but I I figured it out,

388
00:18:08,519 --> 00:18:11,079
figured out history now figured out Like I didn't. I

389
00:18:11,119 --> 00:18:14,200
skip government class every day to smoke cigarettes and take pills.

390
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:18,920
But uh, yeah, this brain knows how a government works. Yep, sure, buddy.

391
00:18:19,160 --> 00:18:20,960
Speaker 1: Well I also read the book nineteen eighty four.

392
00:18:21,440 --> 00:18:22,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you know a lot.

393
00:18:23,480 --> 00:18:24,359
Speaker 1: I know how this ends.

394
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:27,440
Speaker 3: I never read that one in school. I just completely

395
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:28,920
skipped it and never did the book report.

396
00:18:29,039 --> 00:18:31,200
Speaker 1: No one's ever actually read that book. They just said

397
00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:33,839
they did. Yeah, I'll go they quote it. They like me,

398
00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:34,400
that makes sense.

399
00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:34,599
Speaker 2: Then.

400
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, I've always felt left out, but it feels good

401
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:38,240
now knowing.

402
00:18:38,160 --> 00:18:39,920
Speaker 2: I think of all the books I was assigned to

403
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:41,759
read in or high school, I probably.

404
00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:46,279
Speaker 1: Read like four Sam spark Notes cover to cover saved

405
00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:48,440
my ass in so many situations.

406
00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:51,759
Speaker 2: You better believe I had no interest in cracking open

407
00:18:51,799 --> 00:18:55,119
the grapes of Wrath. That just wasn't happening.

408
00:18:55,559 --> 00:18:58,000
Speaker 3: They tried making me read two books and do two

409
00:18:58,039 --> 00:19:02,279
book reports over the summer from sophomore junior year. Yes, sweet,

410
00:19:02,359 --> 00:19:05,440
they wanted me to do homework, not in school hours.

411
00:19:05,279 --> 00:19:07,079
Speaker 2: It was insane bullshit, I did.

412
00:19:07,119 --> 00:19:09,440
Speaker 1: I did you think I'm gonna read that French rag

413
00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:11,799
known as The Stranger? I do, thank you.

414
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:13,680
Speaker 2: That is one of the books I read cover to cover.

415
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:16,119
I did read The Stranger all the way through.

416
00:19:16,200 --> 00:19:17,440
Speaker 1: I got the gist of it.

417
00:19:17,559 --> 00:19:19,559
Speaker 2: It was just so interesting, like, oh.

418
00:19:19,519 --> 00:19:23,279
Speaker 1: I don't I killed him on I smoked cigarettes killed me.

419
00:19:23,359 --> 00:19:24,119
Speaker 2: I feel nothing.

420
00:19:24,920 --> 00:19:27,359
Speaker 3: Why the only one I read was of Mice and

421
00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:30,200
Men because it's like twelve page.

422
00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:32,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, some of those, So that's the thing. Like Grapes

423
00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:35,119
of Wrath is a steinback book that's like volumes, but

424
00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:36,960
all those other books are like they're pamphlets.

425
00:19:37,279 --> 00:19:40,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, the Holocaust book Night Noisel.

426
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,079
Speaker 2: I think I read a chapter though.

427
00:19:43,119 --> 00:19:44,319
Speaker 3: That was like forty pages.

428
00:19:44,400 --> 00:19:44,559
Speaker 1: Yeah.

429
00:19:45,400 --> 00:19:47,200
Speaker 2: Really sure he was a little kid, though, what's he

430
00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:48,640
going to remember exactly?

431
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:51,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, those numbers are misreported.

432
00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:54,880
Speaker 2: Trying to think I definitely didn't do uh. I didn't

433
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:58,519
do uh. What do you call it? That stupid JD.

434
00:19:58,599 --> 00:20:00,640
Sounder catching the Rye didn't read that one?

435
00:20:00,680 --> 00:20:03,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, same now, thankfully. Actually, one of the books I

436
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:06,039
read in high school was a Banded Brothers that was cool.

437
00:20:06,279 --> 00:20:08,319
Speaker 2: I read that on my own, and I read black

438
00:20:08,359 --> 00:20:11,400
Hawk Down like on my own. Uh. The other one

439
00:20:11,400 --> 00:20:15,480
I read was a separate piece and uh a Farewell

440
00:20:15,519 --> 00:20:17,839
to Arms. Those are like the only ones where I

441
00:20:17,839 --> 00:20:19,000
read it all the way through.

442
00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:22,160
Speaker 1: And then of course summer rad in like in elementary

443
00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:27,359
and middle school. Johnny Tremaine, Yeah, what happened to your hand? Johnny?

444
00:20:27,519 --> 00:20:29,359
Speaker 2: It's also just like sucks like I have to. I mean,

445
00:20:29,359 --> 00:20:30,880
I'm sure a lot of these books like classics, but

446
00:20:30,880 --> 00:20:33,000
I was like, I want to read Jurrassic Park. Like

447
00:20:33,000 --> 00:20:34,279
when I was in the tenth grade, I was reading

448
00:20:34,319 --> 00:20:35,839
like Drassic Park. I want to read that. I don't

449
00:20:35,839 --> 00:20:39,559
want to read some stupid book about a boy in

450
00:20:39,559 --> 00:20:43,880
the American Revolution. Okay, where are you marching on Boston?

451
00:20:44,079 --> 00:20:47,920
Speaker 3: Shut the fuck up, I don't care, fuck you little kid.

452
00:20:48,000 --> 00:20:49,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, Johnny Tremaine.

453
00:20:51,319 --> 00:20:54,960
Speaker 1: So Young sent his advisors to DC to negotiate with

454
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:59,480
the White House, proposing a giant state of Desert Rat,

455
00:20:59,720 --> 00:21:04,359
which would cover Utah, Nevada, Arizona, parts of California, and Oregon,

456
00:21:04,759 --> 00:21:06,480
just a huge territory the desert.

457
00:21:06,559 --> 00:21:08,319
Speaker 2: I like that as a state named Desert Rat.

458
00:21:09,319 --> 00:21:12,359
Speaker 1: I think after what they believed was their kind of

459
00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:14,359
unofficial mascot, the desert rat.

460
00:21:14,480 --> 00:21:22,920
Speaker 4: Okay, they did so for food, rat meat and then

461
00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:25,640
make love to five women It's life.

462
00:21:26,519 --> 00:21:29,079
Speaker 1: They did so hoping they could at least govern themselves

463
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:32,960
rather than have an outsider come in. President Millard Fillmore

464
00:21:33,039 --> 00:21:35,880
laughed at this request, but figured there was no harm

465
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:39,839
in appeasing them and these religious weirdos with a much

466
00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:42,839
smaller and less desirable area of Utah. So you can

467
00:21:42,920 --> 00:21:44,400
have this fucking part of it.

468
00:21:44,839 --> 00:21:45,119
Speaker 2: Take it.

469
00:21:45,160 --> 00:21:46,200
Speaker 1: You can't have California.

470
00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:49,920
Speaker 2: Or yeah, you absolutely can't have California. That's off the table.

471
00:21:50,000 --> 00:21:55,400
Speaker 1: Take the fucking actual desert exactly. He also pointed young Governor.

472
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:59,119
Because someone had to keep these freaks in line, it

473
00:21:59,200 --> 00:22:00,880
might as well be their own leader.

474
00:22:01,480 --> 00:22:03,319
Speaker 2: See. I think that's what happened with I don't know

475
00:22:03,359 --> 00:22:04,759
if it says on the show before, but I feel

476
00:22:04,759 --> 00:22:08,240
like I've told you before where like that's how Texans

477
00:22:08,319 --> 00:22:11,359
viewed Austin for the longest time. It's like so weird

478
00:22:11,400 --> 00:22:13,759
that the state capital of a very conservative state is

479
00:22:13,759 --> 00:22:16,359
so like liberal and weird. And I honestly I think

480
00:22:17,039 --> 00:22:20,960
like textan like boots boots with their suits. Republicans were

481
00:22:21,000 --> 00:22:24,359
just like, hey, let the weird queers have their little fun.

482
00:22:26,279 --> 00:22:26,400
Speaker 1: Too.

483
00:22:26,519 --> 00:22:27,319
Speaker 2: It'll mean nothing.

484
00:22:27,599 --> 00:22:29,519
Speaker 1: What the middle of the state. There's nothing here.

485
00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:32,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, there wasn't there fucking wasn't like it was just

486
00:22:32,440 --> 00:22:36,559
a little weird like, yeah, whatever, these little freaks do whatever.

487
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:38,920
They won't And then by then too many people started

488
00:22:38,920 --> 00:22:41,880
moving here, and now they're like, we gotta lock this down,

489
00:22:41,920 --> 00:22:44,680
and they started getting paddle boards and becoming too powerful.

490
00:22:44,839 --> 00:22:48,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're fucking celebrating e Or's birthday.

491
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:52,839
Speaker 3: Naked out of the park for e Or. Yeah, those

492
00:22:52,839 --> 00:22:55,400
are wild though. Everyone smells bad there though.

493
00:22:55,599 --> 00:22:57,079
Speaker 1: Yeah, no one wears the utterrant there.

494
00:22:57,119 --> 00:22:57,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't like it.

495
00:22:58,039 --> 00:23:01,000
Speaker 2: Yeah that is also weird, Like naked park. I like,

496
00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:04,440
what where the where a kid is?

497
00:23:04,519 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 1: Yeah? Just dog out like.

498
00:23:06,519 --> 00:23:09,880
Speaker 2: I'm just like, god, damn it. It's for a children's

499
00:23:10,799 --> 00:23:11,480
character too.

500
00:23:12,079 --> 00:23:15,519
Speaker 3: Yeah, children don't know what it is like birthday. Hell yeah,

501
00:23:15,559 --> 00:23:18,279
your parents don't know either. They show up. Yeah, oh

502
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:18,680
my god.

503
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:21,759
Speaker 1: A bunch of like California people move here. They're like,

504
00:23:21,799 --> 00:23:24,160
oh yeah, dude, thing for the kids. He or his birthday?

505
00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:28,920
Speaker 2: Oh god, just dongs everywhere.

506
00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:32,039
Speaker 3: A bunch of naked white people with dreadlocks.

507
00:23:32,000 --> 00:23:34,079
Speaker 2: Like I hate this like I hate this place, so

508
00:23:34,200 --> 00:23:36,200
fuck A bunch moved to Dallas.

509
00:23:36,920 --> 00:23:39,640
Speaker 1: The Utah Territory was created in the Compromise of eighteen

510
00:23:39,720 --> 00:23:44,559
fifty thanks to a little thing called popular sovereignty, Utah

511
00:23:44,599 --> 00:23:48,359
past legislation that made black and Indian slavery legal in

512
00:23:48,400 --> 00:23:56,119
eighteen fifty two. Whoo, twenty five percent of the Mormons

513
00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:59,480
in that territory practice polygamy, including Young who over his

514
00:23:59,519 --> 00:24:04,279
lifetime fifty six wives. Man's too many ladies. There's too

515
00:24:04,279 --> 00:24:05,400
many women. You have to hear.

516
00:24:06,119 --> 00:24:07,880
Speaker 3: I think back then, you just didn't have to listen

517
00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:08,200
to them.

518
00:24:08,279 --> 00:24:09,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I guess you still don't.

519
00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:13,400
Speaker 3: But being being the governor, have governor shit to do?

520
00:24:13,680 --> 00:24:15,759
Speaker 1: Or you just delegate a couple of your wives to

521
00:24:15,759 --> 00:24:16,680
handle the other wives.

522
00:24:16,920 --> 00:24:19,599
Speaker 2: You literally do you have like wive madams. That's the

523
00:24:19,960 --> 00:24:23,079
U in Big Love, Like, that's the thing. The oldest

524
00:24:23,079 --> 00:24:25,720
wife is like the head wife. She's in charge, the

525
00:24:25,759 --> 00:24:28,440
main bitch. Yeah, I forget what it's called, but you know,

526
00:24:28,559 --> 00:24:30,839
and they're all sister wives, but she's in charge, she

527
00:24:31,079 --> 00:24:32,960
runs everything.

528
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:37,759
Speaker 1: The rest of the country saw this as gross immorality.

529
00:24:37,960 --> 00:24:40,039
Speaker 3: Whe Mormons are gross for.

530
00:24:40,160 --> 00:24:43,759
Speaker 1: Stealing all the hose, and it became a contentious political

531
00:24:43,799 --> 00:24:46,640
talking point in the eighteen fifty six presidential election.

532
00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:51,160
Speaker 2: What do you do though, don't I don't understand. Just like, okay,

533
00:24:51,359 --> 00:24:55,440
all right, buddy, you've got seven wives, great for you,

534
00:24:55,839 --> 00:24:58,880
but now there's six other dudes who have no wives.

535
00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:02,160
It feels like.

536
00:25:02,160 --> 00:25:05,039
Speaker 1: It's a good ratio. What that's kind of ratio you

537
00:25:05,039 --> 00:25:05,759
want in a party?

538
00:25:05,839 --> 00:25:06,640
Speaker 2: What's seven to one?

539
00:25:06,839 --> 00:25:07,200
Speaker 1: Yeah?

540
00:25:07,279 --> 00:25:09,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, but the problem is that there's another party

541
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:10,680
where it's six to zero.

542
00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:13,559
Speaker 3: Just down the road.

543
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:18,599
Speaker 1: Yeah, great party ratio. Terrible for any type of warfare.

544
00:25:19,039 --> 00:25:20,960
All right, all right, Dan, pick up a rifle.

545
00:25:21,359 --> 00:25:23,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's not not what you want.

546
00:25:25,200 --> 00:25:28,200
Speaker 1: Republicans use this to their advantage, spinning the narrative of

547
00:25:28,319 --> 00:25:32,279
popular sovereignty, which was a concept for new territories to

548
00:25:32,319 --> 00:25:36,200
avoid the hot button issue of the time, slavery, from

549
00:25:36,319 --> 00:25:39,640
entering the national discourse, and instead using it to attack

550
00:25:39,680 --> 00:25:42,039
the Democratic Party for protecting polygamy.

551
00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:45,119
Speaker 2: Hell yeah, so they're like, oh, yeah, they just want

552
00:25:45,119 --> 00:25:46,839
it because they're perves.

553
00:25:46,920 --> 00:25:49,440
Speaker 1: Kind of, I mean like they're like, yeah, you want

554
00:25:49,839 --> 00:25:52,319
they kind of like mix polygamy and slavery into the

555
00:25:52,319 --> 00:25:53,000
same issue.

556
00:25:53,119 --> 00:25:56,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, smart, it's good politics, because nobody's gonna be like, oh,

557
00:25:57,480 --> 00:25:59,960
woke pussies, you're talking about slavery again. They like, no,

558
00:26:00,279 --> 00:26:03,119
try about that. They're like that sex cult. That's what

559
00:26:03,160 --> 00:26:06,200
they're They're helping a sex cult. That's we don't care

560
00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:09,920
about slavery. Sex. But they're all freaks. They help the freaks.

561
00:26:12,039 --> 00:26:16,559
Speaker 1: Democrats scrambled to disassociate from the Mormons, believing the entanglement

562
00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:19,920
of issues could derail all the momentum for their sweet,

563
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:22,160
sweet slavery.

564
00:26:22,400 --> 00:26:26,880
Speaker 3: How many Mormons were there, like ten, there's.

565
00:26:26,640 --> 00:26:28,720
Speaker 1: More than what. There's a lot of Mormons.

566
00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:30,519
Speaker 2: There's a lot, but I feel like they are still

567
00:26:30,559 --> 00:26:34,359
a small sect, like all things considered.

568
00:26:35,559 --> 00:26:38,960
Speaker 1: James Buchanan ultimately won the election for the Democrats, but

569
00:26:39,079 --> 00:26:42,119
it was very much on his radar that he had

570
00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:47,400
a Mormon problem. Young had an accumulated a vast amount

571
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:49,960
of power in his short time in Utah and had

572
00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:54,079
his own paramilitary group called the Danites.

573
00:26:54,839 --> 00:26:58,599
Speaker 2: I mean, he's basically just Timothy Shallow magn dude at

574
00:26:58,599 --> 00:27:02,599
this point out in the desert. Kind of a religious prophet. Yep,

575
00:27:03,680 --> 00:27:04,559
he's Paul Trades.

576
00:27:05,720 --> 00:27:09,160
Speaker 1: Young echoed the opinion of many Latter day Saints when

577
00:27:09,160 --> 00:27:11,960
he declared I loved the government and the constitution of

578
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:15,039
the United States, but I do not love the damn

579
00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:17,440
rascals that administered the government.

580
00:27:17,519 --> 00:27:19,920
Speaker 2: Want to cop out, well, I love America, I just

581
00:27:19,960 --> 00:27:21,839
hate every single person who runs it.

582
00:27:21,880 --> 00:27:23,400
Speaker 1: But saying rascals is pretty cool.

583
00:27:23,440 --> 00:27:23,759
Speaker 2: That is good.

584
00:27:23,839 --> 00:27:25,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, bring that back.

585
00:27:27,599 --> 00:27:31,119
Speaker 1: Papers around the country were sensationalizing about the Wild West

586
00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:35,279
polygamy cult that threatened the very fabric of democracy. And

587
00:27:35,319 --> 00:27:39,039
it didn't help that other Mormon offshoots like James Strange

588
00:27:39,079 --> 00:27:41,119
and Michigan, which we did an episode on. Go ahead

589
00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:44,640
and check that out back in the catalog were proclaiming

590
00:27:44,680 --> 00:27:46,680
themselves king on American soil.

591
00:27:46,839 --> 00:27:50,799
Speaker 2: Yeah, that ideal, not to mention.

592
00:27:50,880 --> 00:27:54,039
Speaker 1: A number of federal officials, claiming that they feared for

593
00:27:54,119 --> 00:27:58,400
their physical safety, left Utah appointments for the East and

594
00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:01,240
came back with stories saying to the new president that

595
00:28:01,279 --> 00:28:05,160
the Mormons were nearing a state of rebellion against the country.

596
00:28:05,880 --> 00:28:07,839
Speaker 2: Why not they want to build their own little religious

597
00:28:07,880 --> 00:28:12,839
fucking like the Theocratic like Homeland. That doesn't surprise me

598
00:28:12,839 --> 00:28:14,480
at all. They're a weird cult like you don't think

599
00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:17,240
scientologists would do that if they could do that like

600
00:28:17,279 --> 00:28:21,359
if they just like fortified Clearwater Florida, they wouldn't try

601
00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:23,240
to make a Scientology city state.

602
00:28:23,839 --> 00:28:27,119
Speaker 1: They should build a wall, they should around Clearwater.

603
00:28:27,759 --> 00:28:28,240
Speaker 2: And you don't.

604
00:28:28,319 --> 00:28:29,799
Speaker 1: I mean, you have a lot of water too to

605
00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:32,920
like it's Tampa and Clearwater. That whole area is pretty

606
00:28:32,920 --> 00:28:34,920
spread out, so it's easy. There's a lot of bridges

607
00:28:34,960 --> 00:28:36,680
you just kind of fence off.

608
00:28:36,720 --> 00:28:40,920
Speaker 2: And I mean, if you think you know Muslim uh

609
00:28:41,519 --> 00:28:48,359
extremists or wild just storming that Scientology compound will be

610
00:28:48,480 --> 00:28:50,599
a absolute nightmare if.

611
00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:53,839
Speaker 3: Scientologists are second walk inside.

612
00:28:54,640 --> 00:28:59,720
Speaker 1: What if they're right though, Scientologists, that's the biggest goof

613
00:28:59,799 --> 00:29:00,480
of reality.

614
00:29:00,559 --> 00:29:02,759
Speaker 2: Like they they send a beam in like the US

615
00:29:02,799 --> 00:29:06,039
militari receiving clearwater, and they send a beam into space

616
00:29:06,119 --> 00:29:09,759
to to ask for help. And like the the Marines

617
00:29:09,759 --> 00:29:11,960
are like cloak like landing on the beach and just

618
00:29:12,039 --> 00:29:14,359
as they do, like a fleet of DC nines enters

619
00:29:14,359 --> 00:29:18,200
the atmosphere and just starts lasering all these fucking US

620
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:20,240
troops to take Washington.

621
00:29:20,359 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 3: General comes out of nowhere.

622
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:25,400
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah yeah, fucking slices up Donald Trump and declares

623
00:29:26,119 --> 00:29:29,960
declares fucking victory. L Ron Hubbard like a like a

624
00:29:30,000 --> 00:29:32,480
mist or like a light beam. That's just l Ron

625
00:29:32,519 --> 00:29:34,400
Hubbard is. That's the funniest.

626
00:29:34,519 --> 00:29:36,319
Speaker 1: He reassembles like he's the mummy.

627
00:29:36,519 --> 00:29:40,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the uh the no he What they said

628
00:29:40,359 --> 00:29:43,119
with l Ron Hubbard was that he like just entered

629
00:29:43,160 --> 00:29:45,119
a higher level of consciousness. Have you ever seen that

630
00:29:45,200 --> 00:29:47,079
video of them announcing l Ron Hubbard's death?

631
00:29:47,160 --> 00:29:49,160
Speaker 1: He fucking he's in the five D now.

632
00:29:49,279 --> 00:29:53,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, they there's a video of uh Miskovic announcing l

633
00:29:53,359 --> 00:29:58,359
Ron Hubbard's death. He's like, at twelve oh nine pm today,

634
00:29:59,079 --> 00:30:03,519
our glorious leader decided that there was nothing more in

635
00:30:03,680 --> 00:30:07,160
his human form that he could achieve, and he transcended

636
00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:10,640
his human body to a higher plane of exist like

637
00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:13,480
he was choosing to do it. Would you rather cancer?

638
00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:15,519
Speaker 1: I hang out on earth as an old man or

639
00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:17,200
chillin Atlanis as a god?

640
00:30:17,279 --> 00:30:20,160
Speaker 2: And then people in the crowd are like you hear.

641
00:30:20,039 --> 00:30:24,640
Speaker 3: Like, oh, I hope someone says that at my funeral.

642
00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:29,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, Scott Lopez didn't die. He just found no more

643
00:30:29,359 --> 00:30:32,200
use for his fleshy body here on earth.

644
00:30:32,599 --> 00:30:36,680
Speaker 3: Alcohol did nothing to him anymore. He must ascend to

645
00:30:36,839 --> 00:30:38,519
higher consciousness.

646
00:30:39,599 --> 00:30:43,039
Speaker 1: Buchanan could not let this fester under massive popular and

647
00:30:43,079 --> 00:30:47,680
political pressure, he decided to take decisive action against the Mormons.

648
00:30:47,759 --> 00:30:51,799
Soon after his inauguration on March fourth, eighteen fifty seven,

649
00:30:52,759 --> 00:30:55,279
Buchanan first decided to appoint a new governor in place

650
00:30:55,279 --> 00:30:58,039
to bring him Young. The position was offered to several

651
00:30:58,079 --> 00:31:02,000
individuals who refused in The president finally settled on Alfred

652
00:31:02,119 --> 00:31:03,240
Cumming during the summer.

653
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:06,880
Speaker 2: They're all just like that place sucks and those people

654
00:31:06,920 --> 00:31:09,279
are creepy. It's gonna be like eighty blonde people out there.

655
00:31:09,359 --> 00:31:11,240
Speaker 1: Gonna murder me, ready to murder? Would I want to

656
00:31:11,279 --> 00:31:11,640
go out there?

657
00:31:11,640 --> 00:31:13,279
Speaker 2: You're just gonna like it's just like a Children of

658
00:31:13,319 --> 00:31:14,279
the Corn situation.

659
00:31:17,119 --> 00:31:19,359
Speaker 1: While Young became aware that he lost his job through

660
00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:23,920
press reports, he received no official notification of his replacement

661
00:31:24,000 --> 00:31:26,839
until coming arrived in the territory in November of eighteen

662
00:31:26,839 --> 00:31:29,759
fifty seven along with a nice little force of twenty

663
00:31:29,799 --> 00:31:32,759
five hundred army troops. Yeah, to build a post in Utah.

664
00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:36,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, you mean you're not kick alone. No, you just

665
00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:40,400
like show up. You're like, hello, you're fired, I'm the governor. Now.

666
00:31:40,680 --> 00:31:41,759
Speaker 3: You don't do that to a cult.

667
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:46,640
Speaker 1: No, that dude's being hung from a tree immediately. Yeah, Yeah,

668
00:31:46,759 --> 00:31:50,119
young in the Mormon community feared a renewed persecution and

669
00:31:50,160 --> 00:31:54,640
possibly annihilation by a larger body of federal troops. Fearing

670
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:58,279
the worst, Young ordered residents throughout Utah Territory to prepare

671
00:31:58,319 --> 00:32:01,160
for evacuation, make them plans to burn their homes and

672
00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:05,759
property in stockpile food and stock feed. Guns were handed out,

673
00:32:05,759 --> 00:32:09,799
and ammunition was ready to go. So it's like, everybody,

674
00:32:09,839 --> 00:32:12,680
pick up your arms, we might have to fight.

675
00:32:13,359 --> 00:32:17,559
Speaker 2: Yeah. So, by the way, you said, twenty five hundred

676
00:32:17,559 --> 00:32:21,960
men went to Utah, you soldiers. For those who don't

677
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:25,799
know or don't remember, there was not really much of

678
00:32:25,839 --> 00:32:28,759
a standing US army at this point, like we didn't

679
00:32:28,759 --> 00:32:30,200
have it like we do now, or there's a million

680
00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:32,680
people in the standing army at all times. Whatever. They

681
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:39,200
really only mobilized major forces for wars right in eighteen sixty.

682
00:32:39,279 --> 00:32:40,559
It's when I looked it up because it would be

683
00:32:40,599 --> 00:32:43,200
easier to find. So the year before the Civil War,

684
00:32:44,480 --> 00:32:47,880
there were basically fifteen thousand people in the US Army

685
00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:50,359
and they sent twenty five hundred to them to Utah.

686
00:32:50,359 --> 00:32:50,920
Speaker 1: It's a good bit.

687
00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:56,960
Speaker 2: It's a huge percentage of the army went to Utahs.

688
00:32:56,960 --> 00:33:00,960
Are gonna need all of us there, man, or that's

689
00:33:01,279 --> 00:33:02,559
fifteen thousand. If I don't know, if it might have

690
00:33:02,559 --> 00:33:06,519
said fifteen hundred fifteen thousand, yeah, yeah, so yeah, like

691
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:09,839
an eighth of the army or what I like, went

692
00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:11,640
to fucking That's.

693
00:33:11,640 --> 00:33:16,680
Speaker 1: Why Young responded by reactivating the Nauvoo Legion, Oh God,

694
00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:20,359
which was the Mormon militia created during the conflict in Illinois.

695
00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:21,839
Speaker 2: Dude, what how do you spell that?

696
00:33:22,480 --> 00:33:26,480
Speaker 1: Nau vo Nauvu? I don't know.

697
00:33:27,359 --> 00:33:30,720
Speaker 2: Naboo v there's a V. There's no a V, but

698
00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:34,559
naboo naboo navoo. How much was George Lucas taking?

699
00:33:36,559 --> 00:33:39,079
Speaker 1: It was under the command of Daniel H. Wells and

700
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:41,839
consisted of all able bodied men between the ages of

701
00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:45,720
fifteen and sixty. Young ordered the legion to harass federal

702
00:33:45,759 --> 00:33:48,119
troops and cause delays in their movement, as he planned

703
00:33:48,119 --> 00:33:50,240
to buy time for the Mormon settlements to prepare for

704
00:33:50,279 --> 00:33:54,400
either battle or evacuation. An alliance with the Indians was

705
00:33:54,440 --> 00:33:58,880
central to young strategy if they were to go to war. Uh,

706
00:33:58,920 --> 00:34:02,440
they decided to enter marry between the Natives and the Mormons.

707
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:05,079
Speaker 2: Well, that's how you solve the six guys with no

708
00:34:05,119 --> 00:34:05,799
wives problem.

709
00:34:05,839 --> 00:34:08,079
Speaker 1: I guess get yourself an Indian wife.

710
00:34:08,159 --> 00:34:10,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, like I took all the white ones.

711
00:34:10,400 --> 00:34:17,639
Speaker 1: So tensions high. This is kind of where the majority

712
00:34:17,679 --> 00:34:20,960
of the deaths happened. Not actually between the US Army

713
00:34:21,000 --> 00:34:24,079
and the Mormons, but anyone that kind of was passing

714
00:34:24,119 --> 00:34:26,760
through caught got some Like.

715
00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,599
Speaker 2: You were just like wandering through. You're like, well, trying

716
00:34:29,599 --> 00:34:33,119
to make it in California, got a forny way and.

717
00:34:33,400 --> 00:34:38,400
Speaker 1: Wrong time, buddy, Yeah, wrong time, wrong place. Because tensions

718
00:34:38,440 --> 00:34:41,599
were high and the Mormons were a little trigger happy

719
00:34:41,639 --> 00:34:43,559
at first, you.

720
00:34:44,199 --> 00:34:47,000
Speaker 2: Get spooked, you know they were. And when you give

721
00:34:47,000 --> 00:34:49,760
a fifteen year old a gun and they've already and

722
00:34:49,880 --> 00:34:51,400
you're like, hey, the apocalypse is coming.

723
00:34:51,480 --> 00:34:54,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, they've already moved like four times. Yeah, they're like

724
00:34:54,559 --> 00:34:55,880
all right, this is gonna happen again.

725
00:34:56,280 --> 00:34:58,400
Speaker 2: What a nightmare of being in an army with like

726
00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:01,800
you're fifteen and like you just like have old old

727
00:35:02,199 --> 00:35:05,119
First off, every situation is like a YMCA locker room.

728
00:35:05,119 --> 00:35:08,320
You just see an old dick and balls everywhere. It's secondly,

729
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:12,079
like can you imagine just like watching an old man

730
00:35:12,159 --> 00:35:14,719
bleed out from a bullet wound, Like it's like it

731
00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:17,039
just feels it would just be somehow even grosser than

732
00:35:17,039 --> 00:35:19,800
like a healthy person doing it like old miner, like

733
00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:26,719
an old liken mining for ghost. She's like, ah, and

734
00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:32,079
you're just like barely in puberty, like blood. Just I

735
00:35:32,119 --> 00:35:34,400
don't know why that would It would bother me more

736
00:35:34,440 --> 00:35:37,920
to watch an old gross person bleed out than a young,

737
00:35:38,039 --> 00:35:38,800
healthy person.

738
00:35:42,880 --> 00:35:49,920
Speaker 1: Heavens with tension high, this unfortunate group of immigrants, known

739
00:35:49,960 --> 00:35:55,360
as the Baker Fancer Wagon caught a lot of hostility

740
00:35:55,400 --> 00:36:00,719
from the Mormons. Uh. They believed that the Mormons at

741
00:36:00,760 --> 00:36:04,119
least believed this group was ingrained with the military Scouts,

742
00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:09,719
and the local Mormon militia agreed to a former plan

743
00:36:09,800 --> 00:36:13,000
of attack on this group as they rested in the

744
00:36:13,039 --> 00:36:18,079
mountain meadows. The Mormon militia wanted to give the impression

745
00:36:18,119 --> 00:36:21,519
of tribal hostilities rather than Mormon.

746
00:36:21,679 --> 00:36:23,360
Speaker 2: You know, they want to make it look like Indians.

747
00:36:23,440 --> 00:36:24,440
Speaker 1: Yes, okay.

748
00:36:24,280 --> 00:36:26,840
Speaker 2: They persuaded the.

749
00:36:26,679 --> 00:36:28,920
Speaker 1: Local tribe to join them with a larger group of

750
00:36:29,039 --> 00:36:33,679
Lds disguised as natives in the attack on the wagon train.

751
00:36:33,719 --> 00:36:35,719
Speaker 2: What a fun little Boston tea party. But once again,

752
00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:38,280
just like in Star Wars where the stormtroopers tried to

753
00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:40,199
make it look like it was saying people that took

754
00:36:40,239 --> 00:36:44,599
out Luke's aunt and uncle. I think that George Lucas

755
00:36:44,639 --> 00:36:48,440
just read this and read Dune and was.

756
00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:52,760
Speaker 1: Like, with lazer but lasers, Oh you didn't know about

757
00:36:52,760 --> 00:36:53,960
the Mormon lasers.

758
00:36:55,159 --> 00:36:55,679
Speaker 2: Enlightened me.

759
00:36:55,760 --> 00:36:55,800
Speaker 1: No.

760
00:36:56,119 --> 00:36:57,599
Speaker 3: Yeah.

761
00:36:58,320 --> 00:37:01,320
Speaker 1: During the militia's first assault, the travelers fought back in

762
00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:05,760
a five day siege ensued. Eventually, fear spread among the

763
00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:08,559
Mormon leaders that some immigrants had caught sight of the

764
00:37:08,559 --> 00:37:11,079
white men who would wear hoods. So they actually show

765
00:37:11,079 --> 00:37:14,280
this in American Primeval. They kind of look like clansmen. Yeah, yeah,

766
00:37:14,320 --> 00:37:15,800
well they have they have the bags over there.

767
00:37:15,800 --> 00:37:18,760
Speaker 2: They're like sacks of flower over It's the same thing

768
00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:21,760
as the clan scene in It's not even the clan

769
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:25,079
but Jangle unchained the lip scene, yeah, with Jonah Hill and.

770
00:37:24,840 --> 00:37:32,119
Speaker 1: Where they're cutting the eye. William H. Dam of the

771
00:37:32,159 --> 00:37:37,119
Mormon militia orders his forces that since you know, everyone

772
00:37:37,199 --> 00:37:38,760
saw them, can't leave.

773
00:37:38,800 --> 00:37:40,239
Speaker 2: Any witnesses can't.

774
00:37:40,519 --> 00:37:43,320
Speaker 1: So by this time the travelers were running low and

775
00:37:43,400 --> 00:37:48,719
water and provisions, and the Mormons were like, hey, maybe

776
00:37:48,719 --> 00:37:52,159
some of them think that it's uh the tribe still,

777
00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:55,440
let's go in as Mormons waving our white flags like, hey,

778
00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:57,480
we're here to help. Yeah, that's what they do. They

779
00:37:57,519 --> 00:38:02,920
go in wait white flags. They're like, hey, we should

780
00:38:02,920 --> 00:38:05,320
deal with the natives and you. All you have to

781
00:38:05,320 --> 00:38:07,199
do is give them some of your cattle, some of

782
00:38:07,239 --> 00:38:13,440
your supplies. They'll let you move on to California safe passage. Like,

783
00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:14,719
oh yeah, that sounds like a good deal.

784
00:38:15,079 --> 00:38:16,599
Speaker 2: That's a good deal for anything to get out of here.

785
00:38:16,679 --> 00:38:19,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, we need to get the fuck out of the meadows, right.

786
00:38:19,840 --> 00:38:21,199
Speaker 2: Yeah.

787
00:38:21,519 --> 00:38:25,360
Speaker 1: So they lay down their guns, give the guns to

788
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:29,920
the Mormons, and they march out of the area, out

789
00:38:29,960 --> 00:38:33,880
of the camp a little bit, and uh yeah, one

790
00:38:33,960 --> 00:38:38,760
hundred and twenty of those Arkansas Natives that were moving west,

791
00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:40,679
those immigrants, they're executed.

792
00:38:40,880 --> 00:38:41,159
Speaker 2: Yeah.

793
00:38:41,159 --> 00:38:42,960
Speaker 1: Perfect, Yeah, they're all executed by the Mormons.

794
00:38:43,000 --> 00:38:43,840
Speaker 2: Men, women and children.

795
00:38:45,320 --> 00:38:48,719
Speaker 1: Men, women and children over the age of six. They

796
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:51,599
allow seventeen kids under the age of six to live.

797
00:38:51,840 --> 00:38:53,239
Speaker 2: Perfect. Can you imagine?

798
00:38:53,320 --> 00:38:54,840
Speaker 3: And I believe they just kind of like, and this

799
00:38:55,000 --> 00:38:57,159
was an army scouting party.

800
00:38:56,760 --> 00:39:00,000
Speaker 1: I think they scooped the kids up for the warmons.

801
00:39:00,159 --> 00:39:03,079
Speaker 3: You realize it's not an army scout unit, and you're

802
00:39:03,119 --> 00:39:05,079
just like, let's just fucking kill him anyways, that's man.

803
00:39:05,079 --> 00:39:08,000
Speaker 2: There's a lot of uh, a lot of toddlers in

804
00:39:08,039 --> 00:39:08,920
that cavalry unit.

805
00:39:09,119 --> 00:39:14,039
Speaker 3: Uh they're getting crafted, are we sure? Uh?

806
00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:16,599
Speaker 2: But can you imagine like you're just like a seven

807
00:39:16,679 --> 00:39:19,039
year old and someone puts a fucking musket to the

808
00:39:19,119 --> 00:39:22,039
back of your head and you blast your brains out

809
00:39:22,079 --> 00:39:25,119
the front of your fucking face, and the reason is

810
00:39:25,119 --> 00:39:27,840
basically like, hey, sorry, buddy, I don't really want to

811
00:39:27,840 --> 00:39:32,079
do this, but I want to fuck eight wet pussies legally.

812
00:39:32,960 --> 00:39:35,400
And the only way I can fuck eight wet pussies

813
00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:38,480
legally is to blow your fucking head.

814
00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:41,559
Speaker 1: Off and listen, it's nothing personal. But your dad saw

815
00:39:41,639 --> 00:39:45,079
my face. Yeah, and we can't let that fly. We

816
00:39:45,119 --> 00:39:49,920
already have problems with the current US administration. Uh. If

817
00:39:49,960 --> 00:39:52,400
this got acted, then boy howdy yeah your.

818
00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:55,800
Speaker 3: Six years she's coming with us. So sorry, buddy, you

819
00:39:55,800 --> 00:39:57,360
missed the cup by how.

820
00:39:57,199 --> 00:40:00,400
Speaker 2: Old are you? Seven? Ooh, someone made a mistake. Teach

821
00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:05,039
you let account. Uh.

822
00:40:05,119 --> 00:40:08,480
Speaker 1: The next month, ODS members also arrested and lynched six

823
00:40:08,559 --> 00:40:13,199
California travelers, believe in they were US spies. This you know,

824
00:40:13,280 --> 00:40:15,880
this would happen a couple of times in total, the

825
00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:18,880
majority of the people that die in this conflict are.

826
00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:19,760
Speaker 2: Just nothing to do with it.

827
00:40:19,920 --> 00:40:20,559
Speaker 1: Nothing to do with it.

828
00:40:20,599 --> 00:40:24,679
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's only collateral damage. They're like, gosh, it's

829
00:40:24,760 --> 00:40:26,800
just I know they I know the US Army.

830
00:40:26,719 --> 00:40:28,679
Speaker 1: Because they're just bugging out over the US Army.

831
00:40:29,119 --> 00:40:32,320
Speaker 2: I know, the US Army sent a humongous percentage of

832
00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:35,880
its total force here. It's just so weird how none

833
00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:40,480
of the ones we run into ever wear uniforms. Sneaky, sneaky.

834
00:40:43,599 --> 00:40:46,079
Speaker 1: One of the big players in the lynching of the

835
00:40:46,159 --> 00:40:49,800
Six Californians was wild Bill Hickman. He's portrayed in the

836
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:50,519
show Hickman.

837
00:40:50,840 --> 00:40:52,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, not Hiccock.

838
00:40:54,079 --> 00:40:55,199
Speaker 1: No, it's wild Bill. I know.

839
00:40:55,199 --> 00:40:57,199
Speaker 2: I'm saying that. It's just funny that there was a

840
00:40:57,440 --> 00:41:00,400
wild the Hoocock was forty years later. I'm just saying funny,

841
00:41:00,400 --> 00:41:02,679
that's another wild Bill hick Yep.

842
00:41:04,039 --> 00:41:06,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, this guy, uh, well, on the show, he looks

843
00:41:07,000 --> 00:41:08,400
like he's freaky as fuck.

844
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:09,760
Speaker 2: Is that Taylor Kitch.

845
00:41:09,840 --> 00:41:13,079
Speaker 1: No, Taylor Kitsch is uh. He's he's a white that's

846
00:41:13,119 --> 00:41:15,440
adopted by natives. Yeah, kind of like he's not he's

847
00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:18,920
not a real person. He's created for the show. This

848
00:41:19,039 --> 00:41:23,440
is just a Mormon freak that has like mutton chops. Okay,

849
00:41:23,519 --> 00:41:24,760
but they don't grow very well.

850
00:41:24,960 --> 00:41:25,599
Speaker 2: Oh pache.

851
00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:30,599
Speaker 1: Yeah. In early October, Legion members burned down Fort Bridger

852
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:32,639
so it could never fall into the hands of the

853
00:41:32,719 --> 00:41:35,400
US Army and provide a comfortable base for them out west.

854
00:41:35,639 --> 00:41:36,920
This is also shown in the show.

855
00:41:38,480 --> 00:41:40,000
Speaker 2: So they take out the fort people in there.

856
00:41:40,000 --> 00:41:42,559
Speaker 1: I assume in the show they buy the fort and

857
00:41:42,559 --> 00:41:45,719
that there's kind of like it's kind of up to

858
00:41:45,760 --> 00:41:49,440
debate with historians whether or not they actually offered Jim

859
00:41:49,440 --> 00:41:51,679
Bridger money for it or if they just burn it down.

860
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:55,000
Speaker 2: I think they might have just burned it, like get out,

861
00:41:55,039 --> 00:41:55,639
we're burning it.

862
00:41:57,559 --> 00:42:02,000
Speaker 1: A few days later, three large Armies trains that were

863
00:42:02,159 --> 00:42:05,679
trailing the main army detachments were burned by Mormon calvary

864
00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:09,639
led by Lot Smith. Horses and cattle were liberated from

865
00:42:09,719 --> 00:42:13,760
the supply trains and taken west by the militia.

866
00:42:13,960 --> 00:42:16,840
Speaker 2: I'm just annoyed that I haven't heard the name Romney yet,

867
00:42:17,000 --> 00:42:19,679
Like I want like more to mitt Romney's ancestors to

868
00:42:19,760 --> 00:42:23,079
just be scalping children. I guess I don't know.

869
00:42:25,079 --> 00:42:27,280
Speaker 1: What if they were kind of like the Mormon version

870
00:42:27,280 --> 00:42:28,280
of draft Dodgers.

871
00:42:28,880 --> 00:42:31,519
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, well Romney I think grew up in Michigan,

872
00:42:31,519 --> 00:42:32,719
But I don't know if so.

873
00:42:32,800 --> 00:42:34,079
Speaker 1: Maybe it's part of James Strange.

874
00:42:34,119 --> 00:42:34,719
Speaker 2: I don't know what to do.

875
00:42:36,679 --> 00:42:39,039
Speaker 1: Few, if any, shots were fired in these exchanges, and

876
00:42:39,079 --> 00:42:41,800
the armies lack of cavalry left them more or less

877
00:42:41,800 --> 00:42:44,719
open to Mormon raids. The frustration would build.

878
00:42:45,440 --> 00:42:48,440
Speaker 2: Could they say infantry the army?

879
00:42:48,639 --> 00:42:50,320
Speaker 1: No, they just kept stealing their fucking horses.

880
00:42:50,360 --> 00:42:52,639
Speaker 3: Okay, that's embarrassing.

881
00:42:52,760 --> 00:42:55,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, you just not It's like in your tank stolen

882
00:42:55,400 --> 00:42:56,920
or something. Can't let that fucking happen.

883
00:42:57,239 --> 00:43:00,679
Speaker 1: Colonel Edmund Alexander mounted roughly one hundred men on army

884
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:04,880
mules to combat the Mormon militia in the early morning

885
00:43:04,960 --> 00:43:08,920
of October fifteenth. This jackass cavalry had a run in

886
00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:11,960
with Lotsmith's command and fired over thirty bullets at the

887
00:43:11,960 --> 00:43:15,079
Mormons from one hundred and fifty yards. No one was killed,

888
00:43:15,519 --> 00:43:17,840
but one Mormon took a bullet through his hat band

889
00:43:18,039 --> 00:43:19,559
and one horse was grazed.

890
00:43:21,039 --> 00:43:23,559
Speaker 2: Bad shots, although one hundred and fifty yards pretty tough for.

891
00:43:25,280 --> 00:43:26,679
Speaker 3: Were those smooth boars still?

892
00:43:26,760 --> 00:43:29,320
Speaker 2: But yeah, that's what I'm wondering. Yeah, I mean they

893
00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:32,000
were using rifle muskets primarily in the Civil War like

894
00:43:32,159 --> 00:43:34,440
three years later. But I don't know how prevalent it was.

895
00:43:34,840 --> 00:43:38,840
Presumably they're using a lot of old shit because typically

896
00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:41,880
like during like in World War two, at the beginning

897
00:43:41,880 --> 00:43:44,920
of World War two, the Marines, they showed this in

898
00:43:44,960 --> 00:43:46,920
the Pacific, but the Marines aquadal come out first. They

899
00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:48,800
were rocking springfields and shit, they didn't get the m

900
00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:49,639
one garrens right away.

901
00:43:49,719 --> 00:43:50,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly.

902
00:43:50,480 --> 00:43:53,800
Speaker 2: And I know the Confederates had quite a few smooth

903
00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:55,280
boys at the beginning of the war just because they

904
00:43:55,840 --> 00:43:58,840
had to get something. Yeah. I actually do wonder though,

905
00:43:58,880 --> 00:44:01,280
I'll look it up real quick. If the primary weapon

906
00:44:01,320 --> 00:44:03,800
in the Mexican War was a smooth bore musketer, if

907
00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:05,639
they had rifled it by that point, let me.

908
00:44:05,679 --> 00:44:08,000
Speaker 1: Check important detail. We need to know it.

909
00:44:08,800 --> 00:44:09,559
Speaker 2: I'm curious.

910
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:11,519
Speaker 3: I mean, how bad of shots were they?

911
00:44:11,639 --> 00:44:11,880
Speaker 2: Yeah?

912
00:44:12,000 --> 00:44:16,079
Speaker 3: If if if it's a smooth boar, okay, we allow it.

913
00:44:16,119 --> 00:44:17,599
If not, they just sucked.

914
00:44:19,239 --> 00:44:22,800
Speaker 1: I wonder if they trained a lot, Probably not, Probably not.

915
00:44:23,199 --> 00:44:24,639
Speaker 3: I mean how much do you have to like make

916
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:28,800
is it like you have to make your own ammo

917
00:44:29,599 --> 00:44:33,320
like he did in the Patriot. Yeah, melting is. They

918
00:44:33,360 --> 00:44:34,360
did do that a lot.

919
00:44:34,599 --> 00:44:36,679
Speaker 2: We did an episode that were you on the episode

920
00:44:36,679 --> 00:44:39,639
we did where they were talking about oh no, you

921
00:44:39,679 --> 00:44:41,920
weren't so for the Battle of Saint Louis. We did

922
00:44:41,920 --> 00:44:45,719
this episode on that this was revolutionary war. But at first,

923
00:44:45,880 --> 00:44:48,480
when the city was defending itself, they didn't have any AMMO,

924
00:44:48,559 --> 00:44:50,079
so they were just like, I guess we're just loading

925
00:44:50,119 --> 00:44:54,639
pebbles into our smooth bore muskets. Yeah, yep, it looks

926
00:44:54,639 --> 00:44:57,599
like they used a smooth boar in the Mexican War,

927
00:44:57,760 --> 00:44:58,079
all right.

928
00:44:58,920 --> 00:45:02,679
Speaker 1: On October sixteenth, Joseph Taylor and William Stole of the

929
00:45:02,800 --> 00:45:06,960
Nauvoo Legion encountered a camp in the fog ahead of them,

930
00:45:07,199 --> 00:45:09,119
thinking it was their men and not realizing it was

931
00:45:09,159 --> 00:45:11,960
the detachment of the US Army soldiers. They were captured

932
00:45:12,000 --> 00:45:15,800
and taken to be questioned by Colonel Alexander. Taylor and

933
00:45:15,840 --> 00:45:19,800
Stole gave exaggerated accounts of twenty five to thirty thousand

934
00:45:19,880 --> 00:45:24,239
Mormon militia men camped up in the canyon to repel

935
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:27,199
the army if they were to pass through. This spooked

936
00:45:27,199 --> 00:45:29,639
the Army. They didn't believe those numbers, but They're like,

937
00:45:30,119 --> 00:45:32,519
let's let's not even try to go this way.

938
00:45:32,599 --> 00:45:34,960
Speaker 2: These people were fucking crazy. Also, I mean, you don't

939
00:45:35,000 --> 00:45:39,079
even want to have the same number of people if

940
00:45:39,079 --> 00:45:42,840
you're attacking a different place that you're not based out of.

941
00:45:42,800 --> 00:45:45,840
Speaker 1: And you're just getting picked apart from the top of

942
00:45:45,840 --> 00:45:46,360
the canyons.

943
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:51,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, like sand people like the Tuscan Raiders, and stop

944
00:45:51,880 --> 00:45:55,239
making Star Wars references. Men. All I can picture now

945
00:45:55,440 --> 00:45:59,960
is a Mormon on top of a big rock shoe

946
00:46:00,079 --> 00:46:02,000
being at an army wagon and then going.

947
00:46:07,760 --> 00:46:11,119
Speaker 3: Their wives are like dancing and circles in the background.

948
00:46:12,480 --> 00:46:14,360
Speaker 2: The wives are the jahwas. They go in after and.

949
00:46:16,599 --> 00:46:20,679
Speaker 1: In early November, Joseph Taylor escaped Camp Scott and return

950
00:46:20,719 --> 00:46:22,920
to Salt Lake City to report conditions of the army

951
00:46:22,960 --> 00:46:27,440
to bring them young. November twenty first, Alfred Coming, the

952
00:46:27,480 --> 00:46:29,920
new governor, sent a proclamation to the citizens of Utah

953
00:46:30,039 --> 00:46:33,400
declaring them to be an open rebellion, and a lot

954
00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:35,800
of just kind of back and forth between the army

955
00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:38,599
and the more militious happened. Nothing. No one really dies

956
00:46:38,639 --> 00:46:41,000
in the conflicts. It's a lot of no one who's

957
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:43,480
supposed to do. Yeah, it's a lot of posturing yeah, yeah, yeah.

958
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:46,360
So the real deaths of this entire conflict come from

959
00:46:46,360 --> 00:46:52,239
that giant wagon raid where they executed They executed one

960
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:54,440
hundred and twenty people from Arkansas.

961
00:46:54,519 --> 00:46:56,840
Speaker 2: So that they could keep having a couple of wives.

962
00:46:57,440 --> 00:47:00,000
Speaker 1: And then they lynched six other people from California, right,

963
00:47:01,880 --> 00:47:03,280
and they burned down Fort Bridger.

964
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:08,920
Speaker 2: Yes, effective techniques, a ridiculous group of people.

965
00:47:09,480 --> 00:47:12,559
Speaker 1: President Buchannan came under pressure from Congress to end the crisis.

966
00:47:12,840 --> 00:47:16,000
In February eighteen fifty eight, Senator Sam Houston of Texas

967
00:47:16,519 --> 00:47:18,559
stated that a war against the Mormons would be one

968
00:47:18,599 --> 00:47:21,960
of the most fearful calamities that had befallen the country

969
00:47:22,320 --> 00:47:24,119
from its inception to the present moment.

970
00:47:24,320 --> 00:47:28,199
Speaker 2: I mean, the guerrilla wars against the Indians in the

971
00:47:28,239 --> 00:47:31,480
West West in the desert were bad enough, and they're

972
00:47:31,519 --> 00:47:32,840
not even religious fanatics.

973
00:47:34,760 --> 00:47:39,119
Speaker 1: The president sent an official peace commission offering a free

974
00:47:39,119 --> 00:47:41,679
pardon to the Mormons if they would submit to government

975
00:47:41,719 --> 00:47:46,639
authority bring them Young accepted Bucannon's terms and pardon, although

976
00:47:46,679 --> 00:47:49,400
he denied Utah had even rebelled against the US.

977
00:47:50,159 --> 00:47:52,800
Speaker 2: He's right, I'll take the apartment. I didn't do anything. I'll

978
00:47:52,800 --> 00:47:54,199
do it, but whatever.

979
00:47:54,280 --> 00:47:55,280
Speaker 3: I didn't kill any troops.

980
00:47:55,280 --> 00:47:58,559
Speaker 2: Technically, I didn't close a single US.

981
00:47:58,679 --> 00:47:59,519
Speaker 3: Just stole their horses.

982
00:48:00,079 --> 00:48:03,239
Speaker 2: That kid train up. There was this one kid and

983
00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:05,920
he was dressed up like a cavalry soldier, like for fun,

984
00:48:06,960 --> 00:48:07,639
you know, but.

985
00:48:07,719 --> 00:48:11,519
Speaker 1: Couldn't trust him he was a scout. Yeah, turns out

986
00:48:11,559 --> 00:48:14,480
he wasn't. Oops are bad.

987
00:48:16,119 --> 00:48:19,039
Speaker 2: Who He's probably like, where are they from? Arkansas? I

988
00:48:19,039 --> 00:48:20,360
don't even know if that's going to be part of

989
00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:22,760
America in a year, so fuck it. Yeah, here's your pardon.

990
00:48:23,039 --> 00:48:25,880
Speaker 1: But accepting this part and accepting these terms kind of

991
00:48:25,920 --> 00:48:29,039
made bring him Young a little bit more unpopular in

992
00:48:29,039 --> 00:48:31,239
his own church, kind of lost clout.

993
00:48:32,079 --> 00:48:33,880
Speaker 2: Oh, they didn't want to make a deal. There were

994
00:48:33,920 --> 00:48:35,719
hardliners that were like, how dare you?

995
00:48:35,800 --> 00:48:36,000
Speaker 3: Oh?

996
00:48:36,079 --> 00:48:38,840
Speaker 1: For sure, there's always religious fanatics like.

997
00:48:38,760 --> 00:48:43,119
Speaker 2: No, let's keep fighting, keep fucking bull. Then did you

998
00:48:43,159 --> 00:48:44,400
do secure US land?

999
00:48:44,440 --> 00:48:46,880
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, really take casualties so that they maybe

1000
00:48:46,960 --> 00:48:50,280
thought they were invincible. They're like protected by God in

1001
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,280
this land, this mountain land of Zion.

1002
00:48:53,199 --> 00:48:55,679
Speaker 2: So let's keep going. Yeah. Meanwhile, Brigham Young's like, yeah,

1003
00:48:55,679 --> 00:48:58,239
I should probably take this deal before before they actually

1004
00:48:58,320 --> 00:48:59,840
killed me, before they really try.

1005
00:49:02,480 --> 00:49:05,320
Speaker 1: In the end, negotiations between the United States and the

1006
00:49:05,400 --> 00:49:07,599
Church of Latter Day Saints resulted in a full part

1007
00:49:07,639 --> 00:49:10,599
in four the Latter Day Saints except those involved in

1008
00:49:10,639 --> 00:49:13,920
the Mountain Meadow murders. Oh good, so they got executed

1009
00:49:14,000 --> 00:49:17,159
by fire and squad like twenty years later.

1010
00:49:18,079 --> 00:49:19,280
Speaker 2: Twenty years later.

1011
00:49:19,400 --> 00:49:21,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, because there's this little thing called the Civil War

1012
00:49:21,639 --> 00:49:22,159
that happened.

1013
00:49:22,159 --> 00:49:24,199
Speaker 2: Wow, I'm surprised they even tracked him down, is all

1014
00:49:24,239 --> 00:49:24,639
I'm saying.

1015
00:49:24,639 --> 00:49:26,079
Speaker 1: The investigation takes a lot.

1016
00:49:26,119 --> 00:49:27,800
Speaker 3: All right, how did you even find them?

1017
00:49:27,920 --> 00:49:30,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It's the eighteen seventies.

1018
00:49:30,880 --> 00:49:33,519
Speaker 1: It's kind of sick though. It's like executing Nazis when

1019
00:49:33,559 --> 00:49:34,159
they're ninety.

1020
00:49:34,360 --> 00:49:38,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, going to Argentina and finding some dude.

1021
00:49:38,760 --> 00:49:40,360
Speaker 1: Flip the switch put them on the chair.

1022
00:49:40,559 --> 00:49:42,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I will say seeing.

1023
00:49:42,039 --> 00:49:42,519
Speaker 1: An old man.

1024
00:49:42,760 --> 00:49:46,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, sometimes I do feel bad for some of those Nazis.

1025
00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:48,320
Speaker 3: That parkinsonsors at the electric chair.

1026
00:49:48,440 --> 00:49:50,159
Speaker 2: Yeah, we don't know. No electair is not on yet.

1027
00:49:50,280 --> 00:49:50,400
Speaker 1: Uh.

1028
00:49:51,320 --> 00:49:53,639
Speaker 2: There there was this one, this one Nazi I did

1029
00:49:53,679 --> 00:49:56,880
feel bad for. Probably probably shouldn't, but it's just hard

1030
00:49:56,880 --> 00:49:58,760
to look. It's hard to look at like an old

1031
00:49:58,840 --> 00:50:01,239
lady and be like you bitch.

1032
00:50:01,239 --> 00:50:03,719
Speaker 1: At certain points, like you got away with it because

1033
00:50:03,960 --> 00:50:04,280
she was.

1034
00:50:04,199 --> 00:50:07,079
Speaker 2: Like a secretary. She was like a secretary or something,

1035
00:50:07,159 --> 00:50:09,639
and I was just like, like, she probably deserved it,

1036
00:50:09,719 --> 00:50:11,719
but I was just like, how much power did this

1037
00:50:11,760 --> 00:50:12,400
woman really have?

1038
00:50:12,559 --> 00:50:15,480
Speaker 1: Seeing like a ninety year old woman though swinging as

1039
00:50:15,519 --> 00:50:17,440
she's being hung exactly.

1040
00:50:17,639 --> 00:50:19,400
Speaker 2: They just they just started to jail. They didn't kill her,

1041
00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:22,639
but it's still it's just like, what what did she do?

1042
00:50:22,760 --> 00:50:26,079
What did she even have a choice in? But whatever, fucker.

1043
00:50:28,360 --> 00:50:29,880
I was just like, boy, that's rough.

1044
00:50:31,599 --> 00:50:34,320
Speaker 1: Honestly, the hardest thing you could say before you be

1045
00:50:34,400 --> 00:50:37,000
executed is what Saddam Hussein did?

1046
00:50:37,400 --> 00:50:37,559
Speaker 2: What?

1047
00:50:37,719 --> 00:50:39,360
Speaker 1: I think he just told the guy to shut up.

1048
00:50:40,840 --> 00:50:41,760
He's like, get on with it.

1049
00:50:41,840 --> 00:50:43,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's just go, dude.

1050
00:50:43,199 --> 00:50:44,760
Speaker 1: I kind of have respect for Saddam for that.

1051
00:50:45,079 --> 00:50:49,760
Speaker 3: Hell yeah, dude, Saddam fucks.

1052
00:50:52,440 --> 00:50:55,039
Speaker 1: Conflict between the Mormons and the federal government, particularly over

1053
00:50:55,079 --> 00:50:58,119
the issue of plagamy, will continue for nearly forty years

1054
00:50:58,159 --> 00:51:01,519
before Utah was finally made a state in eighteen ninety six,

1055
00:51:03,119 --> 00:51:05,880
and perhaps was not fully resolved until the smoot hearings

1056
00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:10,400
of nineteen oh four to nineteen oh seven. One consequence,

1057
00:51:10,400 --> 00:51:12,679
though kind of a little fun fact, little tidbit you

1058
00:51:12,679 --> 00:51:17,800
can take away from this, The Utah War directly created

1059
00:51:18,199 --> 00:51:23,920
the famous Pony Express. Really yeah, whoa so lot Smith

1060
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:27,760
in the Nauvoo Legion burned roughly fifty two wagons belonging

1061
00:51:27,800 --> 00:51:32,000
to the outfitters of Russell, Majors and Waddle. The government

1062
00:51:32,079 --> 00:51:34,880
would never reimburse the outfitters for their losses, and in

1063
00:51:34,920 --> 00:51:40,159
eighteen sixty they came together and formed the Pony Express.

1064
00:51:39,960 --> 00:51:41,760
Speaker 2: To just get makeup business to get their money back.

1065
00:51:42,079 --> 00:51:47,079
Speaker 1: Okay, so yeah, you get the Pony Express. From this, sweet,

1066
00:51:47,360 --> 00:51:50,960
you get one hundred and twenty dead just travelers, yeah,

1067
00:51:51,199 --> 00:51:53,320
just immigrants trying to find a better life and to

1068
00:51:53,440 --> 00:51:54,159
go get gold.

1069
00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:57,199
Speaker 3: Yeah, nope, they were scous dude, don't listen to the propaganda.

1070
00:51:57,360 --> 00:51:58,679
Speaker 2: And then the Hill people come out.

1071
00:51:59,119 --> 00:52:02,280
Speaker 1: You get a bunch of seventeen, like six or under

1072
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:05,559
kids being forced into the Mormon Church.

1073
00:52:05,599 --> 00:52:08,000
Speaker 2: I guess, uh yeah. I think they live their lives

1074
00:52:08,039 --> 00:52:09,039
as Mormons after that.

1075
00:52:09,199 --> 00:52:10,199
Speaker 1: Or maybe even natives.

1076
00:52:11,320 --> 00:52:13,519
Speaker 2: I'd prefer the native one, to be honest. If I

1077
00:52:13,519 --> 00:52:17,800
had to choose over Mormon, you'll be like, yeah, be

1078
00:52:17,880 --> 00:52:19,039
an Apache, let's go.

1079
00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:20,199
Speaker 3: Tepees are cool.

1080
00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:25,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's cool and whatever, he's weird. Yeah, I a

1081
00:52:25,480 --> 00:52:26,599
hard preference on that.

1082
00:52:27,760 --> 00:52:32,159
Speaker 1: And that is the story of the Utah War. What

1083
00:52:32,320 --> 00:52:33,400
did you guys learn today?

1084
00:52:34,239 --> 00:52:40,760
Speaker 3: I learned that even though the US pardoned the LDS,

1085
00:52:40,800 --> 00:52:42,119
Missouri was still.

1086
00:52:41,880 --> 00:52:45,159
Speaker 1: Likennk you in the old nineteen seventy it's on site.

1087
00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:50,320
Speaker 3: That's so funny, dude, that is insane. I don't care.

1088
00:52:50,360 --> 00:52:51,719
What about that pardon dude.

1089
00:52:51,840 --> 00:52:56,039
Speaker 2: I wonder if he could have gotten away with it. It's

1090
00:52:55,239 --> 00:52:59,679
like nineteen sixty three, he just blow a Mormon's brains out. Oh,

1091
00:52:59,719 --> 00:53:01,199
dude in Saint Louis.

1092
00:53:01,239 --> 00:53:03,639
Speaker 1: If it was before civil rights, one thousand percent you

1093
00:53:03,639 --> 00:53:04,119
could have and.

1094
00:53:04,039 --> 00:53:05,960
Speaker 2: Then just like that lot like your lawyers, just your

1095
00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:08,320
Lionel Huts just comes in and he's like, you're on Eh.

1096
00:53:10,199 --> 00:53:12,719
He was simply following Order forty four.

1097
00:53:14,440 --> 00:53:15,559
Speaker 3: We should praise this man.

1098
00:53:15,639 --> 00:53:18,960
Speaker 1: Actually nobody told us to stop. Yeah, there was definitely

1099
00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:22,239
one guy, like the Japanese soldier that was found years

1100
00:53:22,280 --> 00:53:24,280
later that thought World War two was still happening. Yeah,

1101
00:53:24,639 --> 00:53:27,559
there was definitely dudes in the Ozarks just being like, yeah,

1102
00:53:27,639 --> 00:53:29,079
dude is on site, just like my.

1103
00:53:29,039 --> 00:53:32,119
Speaker 2: Grandpaty told me, and need the Mormons come in.

1104
00:53:32,079 --> 00:53:35,920
Speaker 1: You collect yourself a scout. You get paid.

1105
00:53:36,840 --> 00:53:38,079
Speaker 3: That's so funny.

1106
00:53:38,559 --> 00:53:41,599
Speaker 2: All I learned is that more of what I already

1107
00:53:41,679 --> 00:53:44,239
knew is that James Buchanan soft on rebellion.

1108
00:53:46,079 --> 00:53:46,519
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1109
00:53:46,920 --> 00:53:51,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, he acted and then folded, immediately folded.

1110
00:53:51,280 --> 00:53:54,559
Speaker 2: It wasn't even losing, nothing happened, and was just like,

1111
00:53:55,159 --> 00:53:56,039
I'm sorry, here you go.

1112
00:53:56,159 --> 00:53:59,320
Speaker 1: Nothing happened in the Utah War. But that does make

1113
00:53:59,519 --> 00:53:59,880
a tree.

1114
00:54:00,119 --> 00:54:04,239
Speaker 2: That does make sense for uh, you know how the

1115
00:54:04,360 --> 00:54:06,800
when the South started succeeding too, because he was clearly

1116
00:54:06,840 --> 00:54:08,559
with Utah, he was just like, I don't want to

1117
00:54:08,559 --> 00:54:10,920
deal with this. And then like you know, Lincoln gets

1118
00:54:10,920 --> 00:54:13,039
elected but he's still president in his lame duck period

1119
00:54:13,639 --> 00:54:16,639
and States starts succeeding, and apparently he's just like, I

1120
00:54:16,679 --> 00:54:17,760
don't want to deal with this.

1121
00:54:18,519 --> 00:54:21,679
Speaker 1: Also, the fact that popular sovereignty gets kind of mixed

1122
00:54:21,679 --> 00:54:25,440
with polygamy that kind of indirectly causes the Civil War

1123
00:54:26,199 --> 00:54:29,960
because it fucks with the whole slave argument. Yeah, it

1124
00:54:30,000 --> 00:54:33,159
devalues it. Well I mean back then.

1125
00:54:33,079 --> 00:54:35,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it makes it a

1126
00:54:35,559 --> 00:54:36,239
tougher position.

1127
00:54:36,480 --> 00:54:37,360
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1128
00:54:37,679 --> 00:54:39,519
Speaker 1: Well they're like, all right, we're cool with slavery, but

1129
00:54:40,079 --> 00:54:40,920
multiple wives.

1130
00:54:42,159 --> 00:54:46,000
Speaker 2: Yeah no, I actually that's actually a fun a clever

1131
00:54:46,159 --> 00:54:48,559
argument if you're if you can't get people to be

1132
00:54:48,679 --> 00:54:52,199
against slavery, which the old school Republicans dude, because it

1133
00:54:52,280 --> 00:54:55,480
is just like it's like Pandora's box, right, It's like, okay,

1134
00:54:55,519 --> 00:54:58,000
popular sovereignty, Sure you want it for slaves, but what

1135
00:54:58,039 --> 00:55:01,000
else was it going to allow? Same thing with Like

1136
00:55:01,400 --> 00:55:03,800
it's not a great example, but like there are people

1137
00:55:03,840 --> 00:55:05,800
like when gay marriage is legalized, they'd be like, which next,

1138
00:55:05,800 --> 00:55:11,079
you can be allowed to mirror your dog? Like, no,

1139
00:55:12,920 --> 00:55:14,159
it's illegal to fuck a dog.

1140
00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:16,519
Speaker 3: Shouldn't be, but it is.

1141
00:55:17,840 --> 00:55:18,840
Speaker 1: It should be, should be.

1142
00:55:19,800 --> 00:55:21,000
Speaker 2: A dog can't consent to that.

1143
00:55:21,320 --> 00:55:23,639
Speaker 1: You can fuck a dolphin. There intellectually a.

1144
00:55:23,679 --> 00:55:25,360
Speaker 2: Dolphin can consent. Yeah, I agree with that.

1145
00:55:25,400 --> 00:55:30,519
Speaker 1: Dogs, man, dogs are not quite on dolphin or pig level.

1146
00:55:30,599 --> 00:55:31,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, can a pig consent?

1147
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:35,840
Speaker 3: Tune in next week to find.

1148
00:55:37,639 --> 00:55:40,440
Speaker 1: An elephant? Sure can. Yeah, but uh go and go

1149
00:55:40,480 --> 00:55:43,639
and try, yeah, try that.

1150
00:55:43,639 --> 00:55:46,760
Speaker 2: That's a funny if it never forget, it's a funny sketch.

1151
00:55:46,800 --> 00:55:50,039
We uh should never shoot It's like an elephant at

1152
00:55:50,079 --> 00:55:52,840
a sexual assault trial. It's like you recall the events

1153
00:55:53,719 --> 00:55:56,360
of the night of June eighth, very much so yeah,

1154
00:55:56,480 --> 00:55:58,880
they like the elephant's the rapist, so he lies like

1155
00:55:58,920 --> 00:56:02,519
I don't. I don't, I don't remember where where I was.

1156
00:56:02,800 --> 00:56:08,840
Like you, an elephant, do not recall the events, and

1157
00:56:08,920 --> 00:56:11,920
yet you boast that an elephant never forgets.

1158
00:56:14,000 --> 00:56:14,559
Speaker 3: Your honor.

1159
00:56:15,320 --> 00:56:17,599
Speaker 2: I rest my case, dude.

1160
00:56:17,599 --> 00:56:21,760
Speaker 1: There's cases in India where like an elephant murders somebody

1161
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:25,400
or like an entire village, and then as they're kind

1162
00:56:25,400 --> 00:56:28,199
of mourning and having their funerals, elephants come back.

1163
00:56:28,280 --> 00:56:31,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, the elephant crashes the funerals, just stomps the corpse.

1164
00:56:31,239 --> 00:56:34,480
That's that animal is smart enough to consent. Absolutely.

1165
00:56:36,000 --> 00:56:36,960
Speaker 1: Who's today's hittler?

1166
00:56:37,960 --> 00:56:41,079
Speaker 3: Everyone involved in the raid that killed one hundred and

1167
00:56:41,159 --> 00:56:42,440
twenty Yeah.

1168
00:56:42,679 --> 00:56:46,599
Speaker 2: Yeah, anyone anyone killing kids so they can have fucking

1169
00:56:46,679 --> 00:56:48,039
three ways. I guess.

1170
00:56:49,199 --> 00:56:51,679
Speaker 1: That's the thing too. Only twenty five percent of Mormons

1171
00:56:51,719 --> 00:56:53,280
actually practice polygamy.

1172
00:56:53,599 --> 00:56:56,519
Speaker 2: Only twenty five that's so basically, like probably a lot

1173
00:56:56,559 --> 00:56:56,920
of people.

1174
00:56:56,960 --> 00:56:57,800
Speaker 1: You're a little people.

1175
00:56:58,000 --> 00:57:00,000
Speaker 2: You're a little bitch boy if you only have one wife.

1176
00:57:00,239 --> 00:57:02,079
Being only having one wife is like being a forty

1177
00:57:02,159 --> 00:57:03,440
year old virgin, you know what I mean.

1178
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:07,840
Speaker 1: It's just yeah, fuck, it's essentially you're like Lafayette in

1179
00:57:07,880 --> 00:57:10,519
French society, Yeah, where he didn't cheat on his wife.

1180
00:57:10,559 --> 00:57:12,199
He loved his wife, and that's why he ends up

1181
00:57:12,239 --> 00:57:15,480
in America because all the French noblemen were like, we

1182
00:57:15,519 --> 00:57:17,760
don't trust you, you don't cheat on your wife.

1183
00:57:18,000 --> 00:57:21,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's mid love to one teenager in this cult.

1184
00:57:21,280 --> 00:57:22,239
What is wrong with you? Okay?

1185
00:57:24,159 --> 00:57:26,920
Speaker 1: And thank you for that France, because Lafayette, uh was

1186
00:57:26,920 --> 00:57:30,400
a big part of the American Revolution. Baller it's the man.

1187
00:57:31,719 --> 00:57:33,840
But yeah. That is today's episode on the Utah War

1188
00:57:33,880 --> 00:57:36,760
and kind of a brief overview of the Church of

1189
00:57:36,960 --> 00:57:40,760
Latter day Saints. Do you learn today? Did you learn

1190
00:57:40,760 --> 00:57:41,039
a lot?

1191
00:57:41,400 --> 00:57:43,039
Speaker 2: Yeah? I mean I learned that James you Can was

1192
00:57:43,079 --> 00:57:44,639
even more of a bitch than I thought he was.

1193
00:57:45,840 --> 00:57:50,280
Speaker 3: And R Martin stole George Lucas, same guy. Yeah, yeah,

1194
00:57:50,360 --> 00:57:53,679
fair enough, stole from Oh yeah. Star Wars is completely

1195
00:57:53,679 --> 00:57:55,519
inspired by Dune and Mormons.

1196
00:57:57,280 --> 00:58:00,480
Speaker 1: You can't disprove that, you can't all you knows out

1197
00:58:00,480 --> 00:58:03,199
there coming at me because I said General Grievous was

1198
00:58:03,199 --> 00:58:07,239
in Attack of the Clones. Look there, surely there's a

1199
00:58:07,320 --> 00:58:08,920
small part where he's mentioned.

1200
00:58:08,679 --> 00:58:11,800
Speaker 2: No no, which is why I remember watching that movie.

1201
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:14,760
He'd be who the fuck is this guy? They're like

1202
00:58:14,800 --> 00:58:16,880
general grievous, you know, and like, I don't know. He

1203
00:58:16,920 --> 00:58:18,519
wasn't in any of the other movies.

1204
00:58:18,840 --> 00:58:21,760
Speaker 1: They didn't Adam in, like yeah, deleted scene or write

1205
00:58:22,280 --> 00:58:24,400
when they redo it for the Hunters time.

1206
00:58:24,519 --> 00:58:26,679
Speaker 2: Just never mentioned once. They're like, oh, this guy's like

1207
00:58:26,679 --> 00:58:29,519
the best general in the galaxy. News to me.

1208
00:58:29,840 --> 00:58:32,519
Speaker 1: Gets fucking washed by Obi Wan in five minutes, Like

1209
00:58:33,400 --> 00:58:37,000
is a total nothing burger. Yeah, it does not matter.

1210
00:58:37,960 --> 00:58:42,760
He's in the cartoon. I guess maybe who could say,

1211
00:58:43,079 --> 00:58:45,519
I don't know. I don't care either. No, I don't either,

1212
00:58:46,360 --> 00:58:49,159
So stop chirping me, you fucking nerd.

1213
00:58:50,679 --> 00:58:52,280
Speaker 2: Go birds, Go birds.

1214
00:58:52,320 --> 00:58:54,400
Speaker 1: Today we're recording this right before the super Bowl. Hopefully

1215
00:58:54,400 --> 00:58:58,280
I'm happy as this comes out. We'll see anyway. We

1216
00:58:58,360 --> 00:59:00,960
love you guys. Make sure teck out the Patreon picture

1217
00:59:00,960 --> 00:59:05,039
on dot com plus softcore History and uh yeah, we

1218
00:59:05,119 --> 00:59:07,159
love you guys. Leave review five stars please and thank

1219
00:59:07,159 --> 00:59:08,760
you if you can. It really helps us move up

1220
00:59:08,800 --> 00:59:14,599
the charts on Apple and Spotify and Scott, we love you,

1221
00:59:14,639 --> 00:59:15,239
thanks for coming.

1222
00:59:15,320 --> 00:59:16,760
Speaker 3: Love you guys too, Thank you very much.

1223
00:59:16,840 --> 00:59:18,039
Speaker 1: Where can people find you?

1224
00:59:18,039 --> 00:59:20,519
Speaker 3: You can find me on Instagram at last ro Lopez

1225
00:59:21,000 --> 00:59:23,639
and uh, I am doing a hot dog counter for

1226
00:59:23,679 --> 00:59:25,559
the whole year, so I'm very excited for that. I've

1227
00:59:25,559 --> 00:59:26,519
had nine so far.

1228
00:59:27,199 --> 00:59:28,239
Speaker 2: Nine it's February.

1229
00:59:28,360 --> 00:59:31,760
Speaker 3: I know I'm I'm slacking, but I'm probably gonna hit

1230
00:59:31,760 --> 00:59:32,840
like two hundred.

1231
00:59:33,719 --> 00:59:34,840
Speaker 2: Hell yeah, it's gonna be allome.

1232
00:59:35,039 --> 00:59:38,280
Speaker 3: So if you want to stay tuned for hot dog content.

1233
00:59:38,559 --> 00:59:40,400
Speaker 1: What is it You're eliminating like three minutes of your

1234
00:59:40,400 --> 00:59:41,920
life every time you jest a hot dog.

1235
00:59:42,239 --> 00:59:44,159
Speaker 3: May I'll do four hundred by the end of this year,

1236
00:59:44,239 --> 00:59:47,440
let's go. You don't need to live that long. No,

1237
00:59:48,559 --> 00:59:51,239
you get a glizzy in that mouth, dude, glizzed up,

1238
00:59:51,719 --> 00:59:52,519
best feeling ever.

1239
00:59:52,920 --> 00:59:55,079
Speaker 1: You essentially want your hot your body to be a

1240
00:59:55,119 --> 00:59:56,440
hot dog by the time you die.

1241
00:59:56,639 --> 00:59:57,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, exactly.

1242
00:59:58,239 --> 01:00:00,840
Speaker 1: You be one big preservative eat me up.

1243
01:00:01,360 --> 01:00:04,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, you should have your coffin. Should be a bun

1244
01:00:04,960 --> 01:00:08,119
that closes this way genius instead of like you know,

1245
01:00:08,440 --> 01:00:10,719
lid whatever, it's a it hits hinged at the bottom.

1246
01:00:10,800 --> 01:00:13,480
Speaker 3: It should be the Winner mobile. And instead of like

1247
01:00:13,519 --> 01:00:16,679
throwing flowers when I'm very like mustard and ketch, Yeah,

1248
01:00:17,320 --> 01:00:17,960
relish on you.

1249
01:00:18,079 --> 01:00:20,119
Speaker 1: Yeah, wasn't that a whole thing with Oscar Meyer. They

1250
01:00:20,119 --> 01:00:23,360
were offering the job to drive the Winner Mobile a

1251
01:00:23,400 --> 01:00:25,320
couple of years ago. You should have got that, dude,

1252
01:00:25,320 --> 01:00:26,679
that should have that was your true calling.

1253
01:00:26,920 --> 01:00:27,199
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1254
01:00:27,280 --> 01:00:29,880
Speaker 3: I think I had to move to California for that

1255
01:00:30,000 --> 01:00:30,679
or something. Weird.

1256
01:00:31,159 --> 01:00:34,320
Speaker 1: No, you're going nationwide, You're going city to city. I'd

1257
01:00:34,360 --> 01:00:37,119
be the hot spreading the good news. Yeah, like bring

1258
01:00:37,119 --> 01:00:43,079
them on anyway, Rob, where can people find you? I

1259
01:00:43,079 --> 01:00:45,440
know you're putting out your your old school sketches.

1260
01:00:45,760 --> 01:00:48,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, Rob Fox three on Instagram.

1261
01:00:48,119 --> 01:00:49,280
Speaker 1: I want to give you a little love for that.

1262
01:00:49,840 --> 01:00:52,679
You're repurposing a lot of TFM content that I'm not in,

1263
01:00:52,800 --> 01:00:53,559
but it's fine.

1264
01:00:53,320 --> 01:00:55,199
Speaker 2: Here in some of it something you'd be in one

1265
01:00:55,280 --> 01:00:57,000
or two of them eventually.

1266
01:00:56,519 --> 01:00:58,320
Speaker 1: When they get put out as a role player.

1267
01:00:58,400 --> 01:00:58,679
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1268
01:00:59,360 --> 01:01:02,079
Speaker 2: At the time. Yeah, the sketches doing well. We're gonna

1269
01:01:02,079 --> 01:01:04,360
shoot some new sketches. At the beginning of.

1270
01:01:04,559 --> 01:01:07,000
Speaker 1: We're shooting sketches, I'm gonna show off my acting chops

1271
01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:07,519
a little bit o.

1272
01:01:08,239 --> 01:01:10,800
Speaker 2: Hell yeah. And then we're king on another audio sketch

1273
01:01:10,800 --> 01:01:12,960
for the Patreon Patreon dot com slush Soft gracery that'll

1274
01:01:12,960 --> 01:01:14,119
be out at the end of this month.

1275
01:01:13,960 --> 01:01:18,239
Speaker 1: And I might start doing some Arthur Morgan inspired sketches

1276
01:01:18,800 --> 01:01:20,679
just because that's one of the few voices I have

1277
01:01:20,760 --> 01:01:27,000
in my back pocket. Yeah, well for Scott low Pearson,

1278
01:01:28,079 --> 01:01:33,480
Rob Fox, I'm Damn Bridge Yester, and you just guess

1279
01:01:33,599 --> 01:01:34,280
I'll served