Speaker 1: Hello, my love lies. I'm Roxy Callahan, and thank you
so much for listening to my erotic whispers. I created
this podcast to celebrate women's passionate sexuality through stories. You know,
hot sex can take many forms, from romantic sex with
lingering touches and breathless whispers to raw primal fucking where
the louder you moan, the better it gets. But you
know what else, I love having fun. Those fun moments
when you're both naked and smiling are so amazing. Have
you ever just laughed out loud while having sex or
try to position with your partner where you both knew
you would be laughing half the time. I love those
moments where there isn't just pleasure, but smiles and fun.
This week's episode perfectly captures that spirit. When I first
read it, I laughed out loud and it was in
the middle of the hottest part of the story, watching
a haunted dildo. Oh my god, my lovelies, that's what
I'm talking about. This story is about a woman who
just wants to masturbate to an orgasm. We all know
what that's like, right and what gets in the way.
It will make you laugh and smile, just like the
best playful sex. I found the story on the erotica
subreddit on reddit dot com and the writer is the
amazing Scarlet Wild. I'm so happy to get to create
this amazing audio version of her story for her. Our
narrator is the lovely voice Vixen, with the assistance of
Kayla and the wildly amusing Robert m. And please note
this podcast is intended for adult listeners.
Speaker 2: Emily entered the vintage shop. She loved everything unique and
loved to wear Victorian era clothes any chance she could get.
The shop was decorated with fairy lights and plants. The
scent of old books and tangy fruits filled the whole room.
The bell above the door rang, announcing her arrival. The owner,
a middle aged woman, smiled at her. Emily started browsing
the store. She noticed her reflection in a vintage mirror
with a golden boundary. She looked pretty in a pink, floral,
flowy dress. Her breasts were at the verge of spilling out,
and her curly red hair framed them from both sides.
She gave her reflection a flying kiss and walked ahead.
Her eye spotted something like a toy hidden behind a
few vases. She shifted everything aside and reached for it.
Her hands touched something silky. She pulled it out and giggled.
It was a dil do, a vintage one. It was
around eight inches long, caramel colored, curved, and had a
rose at one end. She excitedly took it to the
shop owner and placed it on the counter.
Speaker 3: I want this.
Speaker 2: The lady looked at her with a sly smile.
Speaker 3: Hmm, I don't think you should take it. That wasn't
supposed to be for sale.
Speaker 2: EMI's face dropped. But why? She gave the owner puppy eyes.
Speaker 3: I need this.
Speaker 2: Please.
Speaker 4: The lady adjusted her glasses. Okay, you can take it,
but let me warn you. The last owner said that
it was haunted. Emily laughed, haunted, please.
Speaker 3: If ghosts existed, they'd have better things to do than
linger in sex toys.
Speaker 2: The lady folded it in an old newspaper and gave
it to her. Emily walked home. I'll giddy and excited.
She couldn't wait to use it. She took a warm
bath and lit candles in her room. She wanted everything
perfect to enjoy her first vintage dildo. She put on
her soft romantic music, turned on warm lights and jumped
on her bed. She untied her robe and started touching herself.
Her body glistened with her after shower moisturizer. She brushed
her neck with her fingers, moving downwards and started playing
with her breasts. She twisted her nipples with her thumbs
and then pressed them between her fingers. While squeezing her breasts,
her mind wandered imagining a hot man in a ghost
face mask playing with her as he wished ah. She
played with them for a few minutes. As her face
started getting hot, one of her hands moved downwards and
she started touching her clit. She used her middle finger
to rub it up and down, and then in clockwise motion.
Her pussy started dripping as she imagined a man sucking
her breast while his hand played with her clit. She
couldn't take it anymore, and she pushed her fingers in.
She started moving her fingers in a come hither motion.
Her other hand picked up the vintage dildo from her nightstand.
She took her fingers out and placed the dildo at
her entrance. She figured she wouldn't need any lube as
she was wet enough and ready. The dildo vibrated as
a mysterious, thick voice came out of nowhere.
Speaker 5: Madam, unhand me at once. This is highly improper.
Speaker 2: Emily panicked, What the fuck? She threw the dildo away.
Speaker 5: That was most unladylike.
Speaker 2: Emily was panting, what the who the hell are you?
The thick noise sounded. Disgusted, such crass language. What kind
of world has this become? It also seems like there
are no traces of chivalry in modern times. She stared
at the dildo on the floor.
Speaker 3: What chivalry? You're a fucking dildo.
Speaker 5: A noble man, my lady, I am Lord Reginald, not
a toy.
Speaker 2: She moved her hands to her mouth, disappointed.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I actually bought a haunted dildo, and
he's a snob.
Speaker 5: He coughed. I shall pretend I did not hear that.
As a gentleman never eavesdrops, though I suppose I have
little choice given my current predicament.
Speaker 2: She groaned.
Speaker 3: Okay, fine, if you really are a noble man, how
did you end up in this?
Speaker 2: She pointed to the dildo.
Speaker 5: Tis a tragic tale, my lady, I was cursed by
a wicked enchantress with eyes of ice and a hot
of stone, betrayed and condemned to reside in this infernal thing?
Speaker 3: And how long has this been since?
Speaker 5: Eighteen seventy two?
Speaker 3: Oh, my, I have a Victorian snob in my dildo.
Speaker 5: My lady, please place me in a respectful place. But
Lord doesn't belong on the floor.
Speaker 2: She groaned and picked it up from the floor.
Speaker 5: Ah, my eyes, my eyes are madamed. I beg you
to wear appropriate clothing.
Speaker 2: Emily hoffed and tied her robe.
Speaker 5: Madam, I simply cannot allow such indecency without proper courtship.
Speaker 2: She rubbed her temples.
Speaker 3: You are a ghost and a dildo. What exactly do
you think courtship looks like?
Speaker 5: Why? The same as it should be for any other lady.
Letters of affection, slow and meaningful walks through the gardens,
perhaps a carriage ride under the moonlight. Broke.
Speaker 3: I live in a one bedroom apartment. My car is
a twenty thirteen Honda Civic.
Speaker 2: He cleared his throat.
Speaker 5: Nevertheless, I shall compose sonnets in your honor.
Speaker 3: No, absolutely not, he ignored her.
Speaker 5: Oh fairest, Emily, A vision so bright thy gaze doth
outshine the stars of the night.
Speaker 3: I'm begging you to stop.
Speaker 5: Thy bosom doth heave like waves on the shore.
Speaker 3: Okay, what the hell?
Speaker 5: And oh how I long to caress thee once more.
Speaker 3: You are literally a dildo, a dildo. There is no
longing you are the caress. You're a thing supposed to
be in me.
Speaker 2: He was horrified.
Speaker 5: My lady, I'm not some common scar gooundrel. I will
not be handled in such an uncivilized fashion. There must
be flowers, serenades, meaningful conversation.
Speaker 2: She put her fingertips on the bridge of her nose.
Speaker 3: Oh my god, I have to seduce my own dildo.
Speaker 2: Emily decided she had enough. She picked it up, walked
outside while he screamed, and threw it out. She was
so frustrated she blew out the candles, got under the covers,
and forced herself to sleep. The next day, it appeared
mysteriously on her nightstand.
Speaker 5: My lady, I shall not be discarded like a wench.
Speaker 2: She buried it within her clothes inside the closet and
went to work. She couldn't get him out of her head.
Even at work, she kept googling how to get rid
of ghosts from sex toys. She didn't get any answers.
Of course, as soon as she opened the door of
her house, he started reciting poetry.
Speaker 3: You're our fucking ghost inside a dildo. I want my
privacy back.
Speaker 2: She decided to ignore him and went to take a shower.
Her body relaxed as the water made contact with her body.
She lathered herself up with soap, focusing on her breasts.
She played with herself as the water dripped down her curves.
She loved showering. It made her feel so sexy. She
wanted someone to suck the water droplets from her breasts
and then moved down to eat her out while the
water showered on them like rain. Her thoughts were interrupted
by a thick voice. My lady, I want to caress
thy loins. I demand proper wooing. She came out of
the shower and stood without a towel.
Speaker 5: In her room, Madam clothes.
Speaker 2: She seductively dried herself in front of him and got
in her bed without clothes. She thought to herself, what.
Speaker 3: The hell am I doing seducing him by sleeping without clothes?
What is wrong with me?
Speaker 2: She fell asleep while Lord Reginald talked to himself.
Speaker 5: Oh fairest maiden, Your beauty doth shine like the morning
dew upon her room, his tender petals for.
Speaker 3: The love of God shut up.
Speaker 2: Soon the weekend was here. She was tired of trying
to get rid of the haunted dildo. Nothing was working
at all. She was having her breakfast when she heard
his voice.
Speaker 5: I have composed yet another sonnet in your honor, my
dearest Emily.
Speaker 2: She rolled her eyes.
Speaker 3: Please don't.
Speaker 2: He cleared his throat and said.
Speaker 5: Oh, fairest maiden, soft and divine, Thy lips like cherries
tempteth mine.
Speaker 3: She groaned, you don't even have lips. You're a sex toy.
Speaker 2: Your Reginald got offended.
Speaker 5: Madam, poetry is about spirit and longing. Shall I arrange
a string quartette beneath thy window?
Speaker 3: If you can summon a Victorian ghost band, I'll allowed,
just for historical accuracy.
Speaker 5: Ah, so you do appreciate grand romantic gestures very well.
Let me take you on a carriage ride.
Speaker 3: We don't have carriages, Reginald.
Speaker 2: He let out a traumatic sigh.
Speaker 5: What dreary love, starved times are things.
Speaker 2: She finished her meal and went to work. The weekend arrived.
It had been a whole week since all the wooing started,
Emily reached her limit. Enough was enough. She needed her
life back, She needed her privacy and especially an orgasm.
She started undressing herself and stood in front of the mirror.
Speaker 3: Fuck it, I'm so hot.
Speaker 2: She took some moisturizer and rubbed it all over her body.
She started from her neck, tracing her collarbone while looking
into her eyes in the mirror. She massaged her breasts,
squeezing them and enjoying the feel of her soft hands.
She took some more moisturizer and started massaging her inner thighs.
She was getting more and more aroused every minute. She
opened the drawer and took out the dildo. By lady,
that's it. I've tried reasoning with you, I've tried ignoring you.
I even let you court me. But if this is
the only way to get my life back, then I
am going to do it. He panicked.
Speaker 5: My lady, surely we should engage in further discourse.
Speaker 3: Nope, you had your chance. Time's up.
Speaker 2: She sat on the chair in front of the mirror.
She spread her legs wide and saw her pussy in
the mirror. It glistened with her continuing arousal. Her mind
was set in stone. She put the dildo slowly inside
her while moving her hips for easy access. Lord Reginald
screamed in terror, Good Heavens, I forbid you to continue
any further. She ignored him and started pushing him in
and out of her in a few seconds. She started sweating,
what's happening.
Speaker 5: It's so tight and wet in here.
Speaker 3: Welcome to a woman's pussy.
Speaker 2: She started doing it faster while her other hand played
with her clit. She started getting more wet. The sound
of wetness and her fucking herself. Lord Reginald filled the
whole room. Emergency, it's a flood. She ignored him and continued.
She felt herself getting closer. Her walls started tightening around
the dildo.
Speaker 5: Save me, I'm getting trapped.
Speaker 2: Her moaning was so loud that she couldn't hear him.
She continued. Her breathing got heavier with the second. She
glanced at herself in the mirror, a fucking masterpiece. Her
sexy reflection sent her over the edge. She bit her
lip to stop herself from screaming.
Speaker 5: Oh, I am ascending.
Speaker 2: Suddenly, a white light flashed in the room. She took
a few seconds to come back to her senses.
Speaker 3: Reginald.
Speaker 2: She tapped on the dildo and called his name again,
but there was no response.
Speaker 3: Holy shit, I just exercised a ghost with an orgasm.
Speaker 2: She threw herself on the bed and smiled herself to sleep.
She was proud of herself. She woke up the next
morning and noticed the dead silence in her room. No
good morning and no poetry. She sighed to herself and
looked at her nightstand. It was empty. There was no
dil Do there. She started humming in relief and went
to take a shower. She turned on the shower, but
instead of water, there was a rumbling noise. Suddenly, there
was a familiar voice of a British man with a
noble accent.
Speaker 5: My lady, shall I wet thy loins?
Speaker 2: She stared at the showerhead in horror.
Speaker 1: Oh, for Fox's sake, Thanks so much for listening to
my podcast. I'm Roxy Callahan and my Erotic Whispers are
brought to you by tenth Muse Studio.