1 00:00:01,720 --> 00:00:04,799 Speaker 1: Good morning from Hell. I'm Chris, and I died a 2 00:00:04,839 --> 00:00:11,119 while punishment. What it's my turn? Okay, good morning from Hell. Dayton, 3 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:12,919 All right, go ahead, Chris, you can do your thing. 4 00:00:13,039 --> 00:00:13,919 Speaker 2: I forgot. The rest of it. 5 00:00:14,199 --> 00:00:16,879 Speaker 1: I forgot, and my eternal punishment is to do this 6 00:00:16,960 --> 00:00:22,640 podcast for all eternity. Yep, where we interview everyone in Hell, every. 7 00:00:22,399 --> 00:00:23,160 Speaker 3: Single one of them. 8 00:00:23,280 --> 00:00:23,719 Speaker 2: That's right. 9 00:00:23,960 --> 00:00:26,359 Speaker 3: I'm Clayton, the more popular of the duo. 10 00:00:26,960 --> 00:00:32,560 Speaker 2: Uh, founder of this podcast, shot up, Chris, brother of Satan. 11 00:00:32,759 --> 00:00:36,200 But you know I have other more important, prestigious titles. 12 00:00:36,399 --> 00:00:40,679 Go ahead, Chris, let's off all my accolades, go ahead. Uh, Clayton, yep, 13 00:00:40,719 --> 00:00:42,000 that's my name. That's not an accolade. 14 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:44,320 Speaker 1: That's my name, former vice president of Hell. 15 00:00:44,600 --> 00:00:47,159 Speaker 3: No, I didn't I didn't quite make the cut. 16 00:00:47,000 --> 00:00:51,119 Speaker 1: Third place in this Saturday Morning Billard's Contest. 17 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:52,679 Speaker 2: That's enough of that, Chris, that's enough of that. 18 00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:53,520 Speaker 1: Yeah. 19 00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:55,759 Speaker 2: Yeah, I give you the opportunity to curry my favor. 20 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:58,600 Which can we talk about currying favor? Because I've always 21 00:00:58,679 --> 00:01:02,240 just assumed that that was your giving someone the delicious 22 00:01:02,719 --> 00:01:04,280 South Asian dish curry. 23 00:01:04,480 --> 00:01:06,599 Speaker 1: Have there been situations in which you have just given 24 00:01:06,640 --> 00:01:08,359 people curry for centuries. 25 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:11,879 Speaker 2: I thought currying favor meant you you gave someone curry 26 00:01:12,159 --> 00:01:13,560 in order to win their heart. 27 00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:16,319 Speaker 3: Yeah. Anyways, a lot of brown stains later, it didn't 28 00:01:16,319 --> 00:01:16,760 work out. 29 00:01:17,079 --> 00:01:18,959 Speaker 1: So yeah, I starting to understand why you didn't win 30 00:01:19,000 --> 00:01:19,439 that election. 31 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:22,159 Speaker 2: Okay, all right, whoa, it's your funny man, it's your 32 00:01:22,159 --> 00:01:24,200 funny guy. You're the one that's in hell. You're working 33 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:26,719 for me, you see, what's what's what is this week? 34 00:01:26,760 --> 00:01:27,359 Speaker 3: Oh wait, whoa? 35 00:01:27,359 --> 00:01:29,959 Speaker 2: We're like a week out from Thanksgiving? Chris, Yeah, how 36 00:01:30,000 --> 00:01:32,200 do you feel about that? It's always a sad time. 37 00:01:32,280 --> 00:01:34,400 It's always a sad time, like in general, like it 38 00:01:34,439 --> 00:01:36,400 always has been. Or is it because you're in Hell? 39 00:01:36,599 --> 00:01:38,079 Speaker 1: Oh geez, that's actually a good question. 40 00:01:38,159 --> 00:01:38,480 Speaker 4: Yeah, I know. 41 00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:41,040 Speaker 3: This is a podcast is where we ask questions. 42 00:01:41,280 --> 00:01:41,480 Speaker 5: Yeah. 43 00:01:41,599 --> 00:01:45,120 Speaker 1: No, I would say it's worse than hell because I hope. So, 44 00:01:45,480 --> 00:01:48,040 you know, Thanksgiving can always be kind of hit or miss, 45 00:01:48,079 --> 00:01:50,799 depending upon how the dynamic is with family. If you 46 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:52,959 get to like arguing politics or anything like that, it's 47 00:01:52,959 --> 00:01:55,719 not as much fun. But in Hell it's never fun. 48 00:01:56,120 --> 00:01:58,680 Speaker 2: No, never. Yeah, I mean, actually, you know, if you 49 00:01:58,680 --> 00:02:01,040 could give us like a peek behind the the DeMar's curtain. 50 00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:02,519 You know, what kind of foods were you eating? What 51 00:02:02,599 --> 00:02:04,480 kind of foods you're eating now, it's a lot of that. 52 00:02:04,519 --> 00:02:08,039 Speaker 1: You know, Thanksgiving dinner from Whole Foods. Yeah, that's like 53 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:09,919 pre made uh huh, it's pretty good. 54 00:02:10,120 --> 00:02:13,439 Speaker 2: Would you say that your current meal selection for Thanksgiving 55 00:02:13,439 --> 00:02:16,280 in Hell is better or worse than what you were 56 00:02:16,520 --> 00:02:19,000 eating before you went to the Whole Foods? Yeah? 57 00:02:19,039 --> 00:02:21,120 Speaker 1: Well, I mean most of the time we'll go to 58 00:02:21,759 --> 00:02:26,080 your mom's house, Lucy for and there's a turkey. But 59 00:02:26,120 --> 00:02:28,280 a lot of times it's just you know how like 60 00:02:28,360 --> 00:02:31,400 you stuffed the turkey. It's just eating the turkey's butthole. 61 00:02:31,439 --> 00:02:33,360 So it's kind of like eating turkey butt. Yeah, but 62 00:02:33,400 --> 00:02:36,120 it's not like stuffing. It's just stuffed with it's just 63 00:02:36,199 --> 00:02:38,599 the shit of the turkey. It's just like, that's what 64 00:02:38,639 --> 00:02:40,680 I eat at the kid's table. Actually, Chris, that was 65 00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:43,360 that was my curry. That was the curry that I 66 00:02:43,439 --> 00:02:45,639 used to curry favor with. But I'm glad to know 67 00:02:45,680 --> 00:02:46,360 that you think it's shit. 68 00:02:46,439 --> 00:02:46,840 Speaker 3: That's great. 69 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:48,520 Speaker 2: That's great to know that my cooking is that bad. 70 00:02:48,639 --> 00:02:49,280 I appreciate that. 71 00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:52,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, since you know we're talking about roasting turkeys over 72 00:02:52,439 --> 00:02:55,840 and open flame? What if we roasted someone from our hatreon? 73 00:02:56,039 --> 00:02:58,680 Speaker 2: That's a great segue, Chris, that's a great segue. 74 00:02:58,719 --> 00:02:59,960 Speaker 3: Okay, let me pull up ours of bread. 75 00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:03,639 Speaker 2: So, just as a reminder, if you follow us on Patreon, 76 00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:05,439 which you can go to at good Morning from hell 77 00:03:05,479 --> 00:03:08,039 dot com, you can sign up and you can say, hey, 78 00:03:08,039 --> 00:03:10,000 I want to be roasted to ay make fun of me. 79 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:13,520 Ah and I Also, just just so that we're all clear, 80 00:03:13,960 --> 00:03:17,039 I have several steps where it's like, are you sure 81 00:03:17,039 --> 00:03:18,719 you want to get roasted? Are you sure you're not 82 00:03:18,719 --> 00:03:21,360 gonna cry and piss your pants because we're bullying you? 83 00:03:21,639 --> 00:03:23,240 Are you sure that I'm not gonna get some sort 84 00:03:23,280 --> 00:03:26,039 of lawsuit or whatever? And you know, for the most part, 85 00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:27,639 everybody's like, yeah, yeah, go for it. 86 00:03:27,680 --> 00:03:30,360 Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, the lawsuit is an important part. That's 87 00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:32,199 why everything's allegedly, yes. 88 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:34,479 Speaker 2: Exactly allegedly. All right. This week, we have someone that 89 00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:38,759 goes by the name Orange. What okay? Orange is a 90 00:03:38,800 --> 00:03:42,960 retired athlete that found games and never went back. Been 91 00:03:43,080 --> 00:03:45,560 enjoying Hell's and Everyone podcast since it began, and I'm 92 00:03:45,639 --> 00:03:48,439 excited to see where you all go after the war. 93 00:03:49,240 --> 00:03:50,840 Speaker 1: Does Orange speak in the third person. 94 00:03:51,199 --> 00:03:53,159 Speaker 3: To be honest, I read that kind of fucked up. 95 00:03:53,199 --> 00:03:54,319 I don't know if I can. 96 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:56,840 Speaker 2: I'm not fully committing to speaking in their voice, but 97 00:03:56,879 --> 00:03:59,080 I'm also not fully committing to the third person. 98 00:03:59,199 --> 00:04:02,639 Speaker 3: So that's on me. I'm going to take that roast. Chriss, 99 00:04:02,680 --> 00:04:05,400 I'm going to take that bullet for Orange. 100 00:04:05,639 --> 00:04:08,360 Speaker 2: I will point out though they're very vague about what 101 00:04:08,439 --> 00:04:11,759 kind of athletics they participated in, and the fact that 102 00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:13,919 they said, oh, I found video games and I never 103 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:15,919 went back, I'm calling bullshit. I don't think they were 104 00:04:15,960 --> 00:04:17,600 an athlete, and if they were an athlete, it was 105 00:04:17,639 --> 00:04:20,480 probably some obscure sport like quidditch or whatever that fucking 106 00:04:20,519 --> 00:04:21,399 dumb sport thing is. 107 00:04:21,920 --> 00:04:24,439 Speaker 1: I was an athlete, Oh yeah, well tell me about that. 108 00:04:24,480 --> 00:04:28,720 I played t ball, So I'm just as qualified as Orange. 109 00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:31,480 Speaker 2: I mean, they didn't specify if they were a professional athlete, 110 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:32,839 if they were like minor league. 111 00:04:32,879 --> 00:04:34,600 Speaker 3: If they were athlete, I'm. 112 00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:36,360 Speaker 2: Just gonna imagine that they were one of those kids 113 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:40,439 that run around in a football field with a broom 114 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:43,079 shoved halfway up their ass and then they're tracing around 115 00:04:43,120 --> 00:04:47,040 some balls, you know. Anyways, their hobbies include being a 116 00:04:47,079 --> 00:04:51,000 systems engineer, dungeon master, a cosplay personal assistant, and writer. Yeah, 117 00:04:51,040 --> 00:04:54,399 you're definitely not an athlete. I'm sorry you are. I'm 118 00:04:54,439 --> 00:04:55,800 so so full of shit. 119 00:04:57,240 --> 00:05:00,519 Speaker 1: Every bit more of information we get about or only 120 00:05:00,519 --> 00:05:01,720 confirms the obvious. 121 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:05,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, that they are not an athlete. Uh, what do 122 00:05:05,160 --> 00:05:06,240 you think the cosplay as? 123 00:05:07,319 --> 00:05:07,560 Speaker 5: Wait? 124 00:05:07,639 --> 00:05:09,480 Speaker 2: Okay, hold on, it's an athlete, that's what they Yeah, 125 00:05:09,680 --> 00:05:14,160 they cost say costplay personal assistant. I assumed that they 126 00:05:14,160 --> 00:05:17,720 were cosplayer com a personal assistant. You know, they just 127 00:05:17,759 --> 00:05:20,800 say that they're a personal assistant. I'm assuming for a costplayer, 128 00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:24,600 what is that? There's a lot of the mystery to 129 00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:27,600 this this century. They also say that they're a writer. Again, 130 00:05:27,720 --> 00:05:31,000 didn't specify. I'm just assuming that they write whatever the 131 00:05:31,040 --> 00:05:33,079 fuck this is, and it's not very good, So they're 132 00:05:33,079 --> 00:05:37,120 a bad writer. Okay, onto a personal confession story. For 133 00:05:37,240 --> 00:05:40,240 my sixteenth birthday party, my parents did a scavenger hunt 134 00:05:40,360 --> 00:05:42,680 where I had to do random tasks and puzzles to 135 00:05:42,720 --> 00:05:45,720 get presents. One of the tasks was to call an 136 00:05:45,759 --> 00:05:49,160 unknown number the teenage daughter of my dad's co worker 137 00:05:49,560 --> 00:05:51,959 and read through instructions on a piece of paper. I 138 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:55,360 was given the instructions was how to use a tampon. 139 00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:58,480 This was done in front of all my friends, girlfriend 140 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:01,639 and parents of my friends. My dad loves this story 141 00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:04,160 and tells it all the time. Wow, sounds like your 142 00:06:04,199 --> 00:06:04,839 parents hate you. 143 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:05,160 Speaker 4: Yeah. 144 00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:07,720 Speaker 2: It sounds like for the sixteen birthday, your parents gave 145 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:09,600 you a sexual harassment. 146 00:06:10,399 --> 00:06:14,879 Speaker 3: So wow, great, your parents really enjoyed you. 147 00:06:15,199 --> 00:06:15,800 Speaker 1: Yeah. 148 00:06:16,199 --> 00:06:18,319 Speaker 2: I'm surprised that they didn't give them instructions on how 149 00:06:18,319 --> 00:06:21,360 to use a condom because they were thinking retrospectively. Wow, 150 00:06:21,399 --> 00:06:23,600 I wish we had used one so that we didn't 151 00:06:23,600 --> 00:06:26,040 have Orange. Okay, all right, that's enough of that. Thank 152 00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:27,920 you Orange for being a patriot. I hope that that 153 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:29,439 was a sufficient scorching. 154 00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:31,279 Speaker 1: It really means a lot that we can make fun 155 00:06:31,319 --> 00:06:32,720 of you with your support. 156 00:06:32,920 --> 00:06:37,759 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, with your consent legally, not allegedly allegedly. Yeah. 157 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:40,759 Speaker 1: So, now that we're done with business, let's get down 158 00:06:40,800 --> 00:06:42,600 to business. Who are we having on this week? 159 00:06:42,959 --> 00:06:45,480 Speaker 2: Okay, well, I'm glad that you bring up business business 160 00:06:45,560 --> 00:06:49,560 because Chris, you are our store manager. 161 00:06:49,839 --> 00:06:53,240 Speaker 1: Yes, store dot Good morning from hell dot com. All 162 00:06:53,279 --> 00:06:53,920 a good merch? 163 00:06:54,079 --> 00:06:54,680 Speaker 2: Is there? 164 00:06:54,879 --> 00:06:58,000 Speaker 3: All that merch that is good? Question mark? 165 00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:00,639 Speaker 2: This is kind of an employee review on this before, 166 00:07:00,759 --> 00:07:02,480 on past episodes, but we're doing it. 167 00:07:02,439 --> 00:07:07,079 Speaker 3: Again because yeah, you've been doing a terrible job. You're 168 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:08,680 fucking terrible at your job. 169 00:07:08,920 --> 00:07:12,399 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, No, don't be proud that fucking smile off 170 00:07:12,439 --> 00:07:12,879 your face. 171 00:07:13,000 --> 00:07:14,839 Speaker 1: No, no, no, But that's how hell is. It's like 172 00:07:14,879 --> 00:07:17,800 everything's in reverse. It's like, oh yeah, except. 173 00:07:17,519 --> 00:07:19,959 Speaker 2: For when you're actually running an actual business that people 174 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:22,560 can actually find on Spotify and an actual store that 175 00:07:22,600 --> 00:07:24,439 they can actually go to at store dot Good morning 176 00:07:24,439 --> 00:07:26,680 from hell dot com. That's not a joke. 177 00:07:27,079 --> 00:07:28,000 Speaker 3: We need to do better. 178 00:07:28,279 --> 00:07:29,319 Speaker 2: You're doing terrible. 179 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:31,480 Speaker 3: Okay, you feeling me? 180 00:07:31,759 --> 00:07:36,800 Speaker 2: Okay? You launched a red shirt line that was actually pink. 181 00:07:37,120 --> 00:07:38,959 That was your first fuck up. That was early on. 182 00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:42,399 Several pinks, several, so many pinks available. Oh I'm so 183 00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:44,639 glad you got all those shades of pink. It's still 184 00:07:44,720 --> 00:07:47,680 fucking pink, it's not red. Oh we're a new business. 185 00:07:47,680 --> 00:07:50,399 We relaunched. Our store is back, and I say, Chris, 186 00:07:50,439 --> 00:07:52,279 go make me a six six six shirt. 187 00:07:52,519 --> 00:07:54,839 Speaker 3: What did you do, Chris? What did you make us? 188 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:58,319 Speaker 1: It's a six six six shirt from some perspectives. 189 00:07:58,439 --> 00:08:01,199 Speaker 2: Oh wow, that's a great way of putting that, because 190 00:08:01,240 --> 00:08:03,639 you actually had the shirt printed upside down. It says 191 00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:07,199 nine to ninety nine. It has our logo also upside down, 192 00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:09,560 So the only person that can actually read it is 193 00:08:09,600 --> 00:08:11,839 the fucking idiot wearing the shirt because they agreed to 194 00:08:11,879 --> 00:08:14,639 buy the stupid fucking shirt because you fucked up, Chris, 195 00:08:14,959 --> 00:08:17,079 You fucked up bad, Chris bad. 196 00:08:18,959 --> 00:08:19,279 Speaker 1: I don't know. 197 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:22,399 Speaker 2: Chris is terrible at his job. So this week I 198 00:08:22,439 --> 00:08:26,600 am bringing on the inventor of black Friday. Come on 199 00:08:26,720 --> 00:08:27,120 in here. 200 00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:31,079 Speaker 5: Oh, thank you for having me. That's so lovely to 201 00:08:31,120 --> 00:08:32,559 be on a podcast here. 202 00:08:32,720 --> 00:08:34,840 Speaker 3: It's so lovely to have a professional that knows what 203 00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:35,440 they're doing. 204 00:08:35,840 --> 00:08:38,399 Speaker 5: Oh yeah, I've been doing this a long time. 205 00:08:39,200 --> 00:08:41,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean Black Friday's been around for a bit. 206 00:08:41,440 --> 00:08:44,159 I mean it's it's been a global phenomenon. 207 00:08:44,279 --> 00:08:48,200 Speaker 5: Yeah, oh, global phenomenon. We're working our way into black 208 00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:52,080 Friday on a Thursday. People are having black Fridays every 209 00:08:52,200 --> 00:08:55,720 day of the week because Black Friday is such a hit, 210 00:08:56,559 --> 00:08:59,559 and also because it's not based on the day, it's 211 00:08:59,559 --> 00:09:01,799 based on my name. I'm Kurt Friday. 212 00:09:02,000 --> 00:09:05,559 Speaker 1: Oh okay, it's not even about Friday. 213 00:09:06,200 --> 00:09:09,320 Speaker 5: So when I was coming up early on in my 214 00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:12,480 health career, you know, there was black Monday. There was 215 00:09:12,679 --> 00:09:16,159 the Black plague, what you know, the Black plague from 216 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:20,639 the Middle Ages itself, all the millions of people die 217 00:09:20,759 --> 00:09:23,879 and half of Europe just created. Yeah, And I told 218 00:09:23,879 --> 00:09:26,799 my wife Edna, oh, man, I wish I had one 219 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:31,600 of those disasters with you know, black in front. And 220 00:09:31,679 --> 00:09:34,600 I said, I'll never be as big as the Black Plague. 221 00:09:35,360 --> 00:09:39,399 And Edna said, don't you give up on yourself, Kurt Wow? 222 00:09:39,519 --> 00:09:43,120 And I said, well, what if we just overcharged for 223 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:47,080 things one day of the year and then we pretended 224 00:09:47,159 --> 00:09:49,840 like it was a sale. And she said, that's it, 225 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:51,840 take that straight to Satan. 226 00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:55,200 Speaker 1: Does that share your last name, Edna Friday? 227 00:09:55,279 --> 00:09:59,600 Speaker 5: Yes. We were married and in eleven thirty seven, a 228 00:10:00,039 --> 00:10:02,519 you know, the year. 229 00:10:05,120 --> 00:10:06,519 Speaker 3: From the Black Plague. 230 00:10:06,559 --> 00:10:09,679 Speaker 5: Like you're like, oh yeah. In that era, there weren't 231 00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:13,080 a lot of opportunities for for us common folks. So 232 00:10:13,159 --> 00:10:17,639 we were both ship tasters. Yeah, we tasted the soil 233 00:10:17,720 --> 00:10:20,320 and made sure the soil was good for the crystal. 234 00:10:21,240 --> 00:10:25,159 That was a respectable vocation at that time. I looked 235 00:10:25,159 --> 00:10:28,000 at her with a mouthful of pool and I thought 236 00:10:28,000 --> 00:10:31,120 to myself, that is the woman I want to marry. 237 00:10:31,360 --> 00:10:33,679 She had a touch of leprosy at the time. 238 00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:36,200 Speaker 1: Just touch, that's how you get it. 239 00:10:36,200 --> 00:10:39,080 Speaker 5: Though, after I picked up her nose, I said, that 240 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:42,519 was the most beautiful nose I've ever seen. Wow, said, 241 00:10:43,159 --> 00:10:44,159 what a lovely woman. 242 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:45,200 Speaker 1: That's the one for me. 243 00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:46,720 Speaker 2: That's beautiful. 244 00:10:46,799 --> 00:10:49,639 Speaker 5: So she's the one that made me get into retail. 245 00:10:50,240 --> 00:10:54,080 She said, you're so good at with the ship, why 246 00:10:54,120 --> 00:10:55,159 not sell some shit? 247 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:56,759 Speaker 2: H that's beautiful. 248 00:10:57,039 --> 00:10:59,759 Speaker 1: So you invented black Friday? Is that what you were 249 00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:00,480 asked with? 250 00:11:00,840 --> 00:11:01,120 Speaker 4: No? 251 00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:03,600 Speaker 5: For a one nine hundred years or so, I was 252 00:11:03,879 --> 00:11:07,039 in charge of just when older men, when they're peeing 253 00:11:07,080 --> 00:11:09,639 at the urinal, they zip up their clothes and then 254 00:11:09,679 --> 00:11:11,799 a little bit more pea comes out. Yeah, that's a 255 00:11:12,320 --> 00:11:15,200 job making sure a little bit more pea comes. 256 00:11:14,960 --> 00:11:18,559 Speaker 2: Out a respectable position. That's a good job. You know. 257 00:11:18,679 --> 00:11:21,320 Speaker 5: I was happy doing that. I was happy being in 258 00:11:21,399 --> 00:11:24,360 charge of that, just squeezing the prostate a little bit 259 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:28,000 so the little bit of pea comes out. And I 260 00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:31,039 was doing that for about nine hundred years. Yeah, And 261 00:11:31,080 --> 00:11:33,399 I told that I got to be doing something more 262 00:11:33,440 --> 00:11:36,159 with my life, and she said, well, you're in hell. 263 00:11:36,639 --> 00:11:39,120 You know, you have your whole after life in front 264 00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:42,600 of you. No reason to be upset about it. So 265 00:11:42,919 --> 00:11:47,679 the next day I went into the front office. I said, Satan, 266 00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,440 I'd like to do more. He said, why do you 267 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:52,559 want to do more? You're already doing so well with 268 00:11:52,639 --> 00:11:55,840 the squeezing the pace. I said, give me some time 269 00:11:55,879 --> 00:11:57,799 to think about it, because I want to have my 270 00:11:57,879 --> 00:12:00,000 own I want to make my mark on the world. 271 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:01,840 I want to make my black play. 272 00:12:01,919 --> 00:12:05,039 Speaker 2: Yeah, not just mark in someone's pants. You want to 273 00:12:05,039 --> 00:12:06,120 make your mark on the world. 274 00:12:06,360 --> 00:12:09,279 Speaker 5: I know, because the marks that I was making was 275 00:12:09,360 --> 00:12:12,480 just that little tiny circle piss. 276 00:12:12,559 --> 00:12:14,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, No, Krystal's what you're talking about. Yeah, he's got 277 00:12:14,759 --> 00:12:19,039 them all the time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, so yeah, yeah, 278 00:12:19,080 --> 00:12:21,200 sometimes we play catch with my prostates. 279 00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:25,320 Speaker 5: Oh that's well, you better make that a clean catcher 280 00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:27,200 else it's going to be spraying in the face. 281 00:12:28,240 --> 00:12:29,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, we know, we know. 282 00:12:29,799 --> 00:12:33,200 Speaker 5: So yeah, I thought, well, people are shopping these days, 283 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:36,240 so why not do something around shopping? Yeah? 284 00:12:36,399 --> 00:12:38,279 Speaker 1: Who did you talk to, like, how do you go 285 00:12:38,320 --> 00:12:40,000 about starting Black Friday? 286 00:12:40,360 --> 00:12:43,879 Speaker 5: Well, you know how it's harder to get things done 287 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:48,159 on Earth when you're up in Hell. So I said, hey, 288 00:12:48,399 --> 00:12:52,399 is there anybody that would be so discontent in their 289 00:12:52,440 --> 00:12:55,960 life on Earth that they'd be willing to help out 290 00:12:56,000 --> 00:13:00,919 hell a little bit. And then they said, sure retail 291 00:13:01,039 --> 00:13:02,720 workers in big box stores. 292 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:03,679 Speaker 1: Uh huh. 293 00:13:03,799 --> 00:13:07,360 Speaker 5: Yeah, So we just sort of sent the memo out 294 00:13:07,399 --> 00:13:11,120 to everyone. Hey, how about we do this right after 295 00:13:11,320 --> 00:13:15,559 Thanksgiving so that people, you know, they're talking about how 296 00:13:15,639 --> 00:13:18,840 thankful they are, and then we can remind them that 297 00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:23,120 actually they're not. But like, because I had been looking 298 00:13:23,240 --> 00:13:27,559 for a reason to cause a stampede that wasn't a 299 00:13:27,679 --> 00:13:30,200 natural disaster or anything like that. 300 00:13:30,600 --> 00:13:31,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, and I. 301 00:13:32,039 --> 00:13:36,159 Speaker 5: Thought, wouldn't it be neat if we could cause a 302 00:13:36,240 --> 00:13:42,039 stampede inside just because people wanted the same seven to 303 00:13:42,120 --> 00:13:43,080 twenty p TV? 304 00:13:43,320 --> 00:13:47,639 Speaker 2: Yeah? Man, that's that's brilliant. You know, you're really Capitalism 305 00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:50,240 is already evil. You know, money's the root of all 306 00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:50,960 evil and all that. 307 00:13:51,039 --> 00:13:53,519 Speaker 5: Well, I don't think so. I think money is just fine, 308 00:13:53,679 --> 00:13:58,679 especially if it causes hatred within people. 309 00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:04,279 Speaker 2: Oh okay, So I mean, but what's your name against? 310 00:14:04,279 --> 00:14:08,759 Its Kurt Friday? Chris Kurt? I mean, were you always evil? 311 00:14:09,200 --> 00:14:12,799 Speaker 5: I am not evil. I'm just somebody that loves people shopping. 312 00:14:13,200 --> 00:14:17,240 I love people getting upset, I love people getting trampled. 313 00:14:17,519 --> 00:14:23,000 I love people fighting over meaningless good I'm a good person. 314 00:14:23,720 --> 00:14:27,039 Speaker 2: And if that's evil, then you know, call me Vladimir Putin, 315 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:27,480 you know. 316 00:14:27,799 --> 00:14:31,039 Speaker 1: Well, but yeah, I mean you are in hell. You 317 00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:33,279 are like a demon, so yeah, you are evil? 318 00:14:33,399 --> 00:14:34,799 Speaker 2: Like right, yeah, Well. 319 00:14:36,000 --> 00:14:38,840 Speaker 1: I'm just saying it's like, are you intentionally trying to just. 320 00:14:38,919 --> 00:14:43,320 Speaker 5: Cau the hell? Would you call yourself evil? No? 321 00:14:43,480 --> 00:14:46,399 Speaker 3: Turns, Chris, Let's talk about. 322 00:14:46,159 --> 00:14:50,960 Speaker 5: You podcast around it? Maybe you need to be kidding 323 00:14:51,039 --> 00:14:54,799 some some self love in this, Like, I'm proud of 324 00:14:54,879 --> 00:15:00,440 what I do. You do the world of service without me. 325 00:15:01,080 --> 00:15:05,919 Without me, people wouldn't be leaving their stupid Thanksgiving dinners 326 00:15:07,120 --> 00:15:10,279 to go and get ten percent off on a ninja blender. 327 00:15:10,639 --> 00:15:14,279 Speaker 1: Right, well, look, I'm proud of what I do too. 328 00:15:14,759 --> 00:15:22,039 What would the world be without podcasting? Okay? 329 00:15:24,080 --> 00:15:27,759 Speaker 5: Well, I mean that is a question like what would 330 00:15:27,799 --> 00:15:34,639 the world be without three guys just improvising comedy bits 331 00:15:34,679 --> 00:15:38,080 and laughing at themselves? Oh yeah, we need one more 332 00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:42,360 of those. You probably you're saying that I'm evil. And 333 00:15:42,440 --> 00:15:46,360 the fact that you have been able to fleece people 334 00:15:46,519 --> 00:15:50,720 out of the harder money to support this work, well, 335 00:15:51,240 --> 00:15:52,919 it shows that there's hope. 336 00:15:52,679 --> 00:15:56,080 Speaker 1: For you to consider it fleecing. And I don't exactly 337 00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:58,279 know what that means. But I don't consider it, Chris. 338 00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:00,399 Speaker 2: We got to call it for what it is. You 339 00:16:00,399 --> 00:16:02,600 We were absolutely robbing and scamming people. 340 00:16:03,200 --> 00:16:04,240 Speaker 1: No, no, we're. 341 00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:08,320 Speaker 5: Just biding a service. Well, you're talking at people, Christ 342 00:16:08,720 --> 00:16:12,159 with things that you don't even prepare. You don't even 343 00:16:12,279 --> 00:16:14,720 remember the names of the guests. 344 00:16:14,799 --> 00:16:18,200 Speaker 2: That'll get caught during the vaccine rollout during the pandemic, 345 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:23,919 they were vaccinating the frontline comedians and podcasters. Okay, we're 346 00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:27,039 not exactly an essential service. So Kurt's onto a couple 347 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:28,080 of things. Let's be real. 348 00:16:28,799 --> 00:16:31,039 Speaker 1: Well, at least no one is dying. 349 00:16:31,919 --> 00:16:35,679 Speaker 5: People are gonna die all the time, right, So why 350 00:16:35,759 --> 00:16:38,919 not in the place that they love, going after a 351 00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:42,279 video game console that they love? Well, that's what a 352 00:16:42,320 --> 00:16:43,240 good person does. 353 00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:45,919 Speaker 1: That is because do you think no one wants to 354 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:49,720 die at a department store buying some crappy merch? 355 00:16:49,879 --> 00:16:52,399 Speaker 3: What do you have for proof? How do you know that, Chris? 356 00:16:52,480 --> 00:16:56,200 Speaker 1: That's not kidding one second. 357 00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:01,480 Speaker 2: Well, I don't know where Chris ran off to you. 358 00:17:01,519 --> 00:17:05,440 But while we're already in the spirit of savings and sales, hey, 359 00:17:05,519 --> 00:17:07,720 let's talk about a word from our sponsor this week. 360 00:17:07,720 --> 00:17:10,920 Gets hero Forge that's right. 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Thank you hero Forts for sponsoring us 393 00:18:43,079 --> 00:18:45,480 this week. We also wanted to shout out another podcast 394 00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:47,079 that you should absolutely check out. 395 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:48,640 Speaker 3: It's the Cult Podcast. 396 00:18:49,000 --> 00:18:51,839 Speaker 2: Join Page Wesley and our Monotaires every Monday to hear 397 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,519 all about a new group of fanatics and they're insane leaders. 398 00:18:54,640 --> 00:18:57,279 These goofy jokes and horrifying subjects are a great way 399 00:18:57,279 --> 00:18:59,480 to remember don't drink the kool aid. We got a 400 00:18:59,519 --> 00:19:01,839 lot of friends of the show on Cult podcasts. I'm 401 00:19:01,880 --> 00:19:04,599 not talking about Paige Wesley and Armando Torres. Fuck those guys. 402 00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:08,640 I'm talking about Charles Manson. Uh, Heaven's Gate sound familiar, 403 00:19:09,079 --> 00:19:12,359 maybe the Bethel Church and all sorts of fun people 404 00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:15,559 that are actually horrifying cult leaders. And you can hear 405 00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:18,640 about their terrifying stories but from a comedic gangle, because 406 00:19:18,680 --> 00:19:22,079 Page and Hermano, despite their best efforts, are very funny. 407 00:19:22,279 --> 00:19:24,599 So you should go check them out to very well researched, 408 00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:27,480 very well produced show comes out every Monday. You can 409 00:19:27,480 --> 00:19:29,960 find it where every Fine podcasts, and you can also 410 00:19:30,039 --> 00:19:33,319 go to their web page. It's called podcastshow dot com. 411 00:19:33,359 --> 00:19:37,279 So thank you Cold Podcast and thank you hero Forge. Okay, 412 00:19:37,279 --> 00:19:38,200 all right, Chris is back. 413 00:19:38,240 --> 00:19:41,839 Speaker 1: All right, all right, I'd like y'all to meet what 414 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:42,559 was your name again? 415 00:19:43,160 --> 00:19:47,000 Speaker 4: Oh my name is chit chit Ohio, chit Ohio, Ohio. 416 00:19:47,160 --> 00:19:51,279 Speaker 1: Oh you bet you okay, chit Ohio. Tell them your story. 417 00:19:51,279 --> 00:19:54,440 Speaker 4: Oh my story. Oh it's a real horror story. Are 418 00:19:54,440 --> 00:19:55,759 you sure you're ready to hear it? 419 00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:56,400 Speaker 1: Yeah? 420 00:19:56,480 --> 00:19:58,279 Speaker 3: I mean yeah, we're a podcast we gotta fill. 421 00:19:58,559 --> 00:20:02,319 Speaker 4: Oh lordy LORDI I went out. Oh, I want to 422 00:20:02,359 --> 00:20:05,079 say a couple at least four or five years ago. 423 00:20:05,559 --> 00:20:08,960 I went out, and here's the thing. My intention was 424 00:20:09,000 --> 00:20:12,400 to get a good deal on a black Friday. So 425 00:20:12,519 --> 00:20:15,640 I went out on a Tuesday. That's the name. I 426 00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:19,279 got there on a Tuesday. I was the thirteenth person 427 00:20:19,319 --> 00:20:22,960 in line. Lucky number thirteen, I said, And so I said, 428 00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:24,640 this should be good for me. So I, you know, 429 00:20:24,759 --> 00:20:27,839 I held out. I held my urine, and I waited 430 00:20:27,839 --> 00:20:31,160 a couple of days. Oh, I missed dinner with my family. Yeah, 431 00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:34,799 got heard a word from my mother about that one. 432 00:20:34,839 --> 00:20:37,440 I'll tell you that much. But I missed. I missed 433 00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:41,880 the stuffing. I missed the turkey, I missed the potatoes. 434 00:20:42,559 --> 00:20:46,839 I missed the cranberry sauces. Yeah, I missed thank you. 435 00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:50,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I missed important time with your family. 436 00:20:50,799 --> 00:20:53,039 Speaker 4: Yeah. What was I talking about? 437 00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:53,880 Speaker 2: Friday? 438 00:20:53,960 --> 00:20:54,160 Speaker 5: Oh? 439 00:20:54,279 --> 00:20:57,119 Speaker 4: Right, like Friday. So I'm waiting in the line. You 440 00:20:57,160 --> 00:20:59,200 know what the temperature was? You know what it came 441 00:20:59,279 --> 00:21:00,519 to that Thursday day night. 442 00:21:00,839 --> 00:21:03,039 Speaker 2: I mean, I can't place your accent, but I'm imagining 443 00:21:03,079 --> 00:21:04,720 you was up north, so probably cold. 444 00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:08,799 Speaker 4: Oh no, this was in Venezuela. Oh okay, yeah, so 445 00:21:08,920 --> 00:21:13,039 it was nice actually, okay, pretty good sleep. It was 446 00:21:13,079 --> 00:21:15,720 a pretty good sleep. But then so here here we come, 447 00:21:15,799 --> 00:21:18,000 and now I see the employees. They're going into the 448 00:21:18,079 --> 00:21:19,799 door because they say they're going to open at two 449 00:21:19,880 --> 00:21:23,720 am Black Friday early. So when they see them milling 450 00:21:23,799 --> 00:21:26,799 about inside of the best Buy, we all perk up, 451 00:21:26,839 --> 00:21:28,960 the first twenty of us when we say okay, here 452 00:21:29,000 --> 00:21:31,400 we go, game time. And so we're lined up. Let 453 00:21:31,400 --> 00:21:34,160 me tell you this much. It's chaos right away. And 454 00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:36,359 there must have been yeah, there must have been at 455 00:21:36,440 --> 00:21:40,279 least twenty five hundred people behind me. Wow, twenty five 456 00:21:40,359 --> 00:21:42,440 hundred people, ridiculous. 457 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,599 Speaker 3: All shuffling into that Venezuelan best Buy. 458 00:21:44,759 --> 00:21:47,519 Speaker 4: Can you imagine it. It's like a Chapel Rowan concert, 459 00:21:48,000 --> 00:21:50,799 just rushing in on you. And I'm at the front, mom, 460 00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:53,359 at the peak of the whole line there, and I'm 461 00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:57,319 so I'm rushing in. Someone steps on my ankle. Okay, oh, 462 00:21:57,880 --> 00:22:00,559 I'm in the TV aisle and I go down like 463 00:22:00,599 --> 00:22:03,400 a sack of potatoes. Oh did I mention I didn't 464 00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:06,079 get to have any of the potatoes the night before either? Yeah, 465 00:22:06,119 --> 00:22:08,839 you didn't mention that you did, so I didn't have 466 00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:10,720 any of the potatoes. So I go down like a 467 00:22:10,759 --> 00:22:14,400 sack of potatoes and I'm screaming help, help, which is 468 00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:18,960 are you daughter? Are you daughter? In Venezuela. Right, yeah, yeah. 469 00:22:19,079 --> 00:22:22,680 So I'm screaming for help and no one's helping me. 470 00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:26,160 They're stomping me. I'm getting boots in my face. I 471 00:22:26,240 --> 00:22:30,440 got my orbital sucket crushed. I got my ankle shattered 472 00:22:30,440 --> 00:22:33,480 to a thousand pieces. He always like getting broken upon 473 00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:36,279 the wheel. You know, they took out every one of 474 00:22:36,279 --> 00:22:39,759 my joints. I'm just a hideous blob on the ground 475 00:22:39,799 --> 00:22:44,200 of this Best Buy, bleeding in every single hole. It's disgusting. 476 00:22:44,240 --> 00:22:45,799 It's a night living nightmare. 477 00:22:45,960 --> 00:22:48,200 Speaker 1: Did anyone stop even help? 478 00:22:48,519 --> 00:22:48,720 Speaker 5: Well? 479 00:22:48,759 --> 00:22:51,799 Speaker 4: I started screaming for a manager. Uh huh, I said, 480 00:22:52,160 --> 00:22:56,480 help best Buy manager. He comes by, spitz in my eye. 481 00:22:56,720 --> 00:23:00,640 Oh wow, he said, don't you know what's happening right now? 482 00:23:01,039 --> 00:23:04,559 It's Black Friday. We don't have time to help on 483 00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:08,759 Black Friday, we only have time for deals. And so 484 00:23:09,039 --> 00:23:12,400 I'm lying there a big, hideous mess. I could feel 485 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:16,960 the life draining out of my body. Everything broken, but 486 00:23:17,079 --> 00:23:21,000 still aware. The brain. The brain was strong, so I 487 00:23:21,119 --> 00:23:23,960 was still aware. You know, tough skull, well not no, 488 00:23:24,039 --> 00:23:26,559 the skull was shattered to a thousand bits. But I 489 00:23:26,680 --> 00:23:30,759 was conscious of the pain. Oh, it's conscious of the pain. Okay, 490 00:23:31,200 --> 00:23:34,920 and so there I am as I'm dying, life dripping 491 00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:38,039 out of my body. What do I see through my 492 00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:38,920 broken eyes? 493 00:23:39,279 --> 00:23:39,960 Speaker 1: Your family? 494 00:23:40,279 --> 00:23:40,359 Speaker 5: No? 495 00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:44,880 Speaker 4: Hidden beneath the bottom shelf, A forty seven inch plasma 496 00:23:44,880 --> 00:23:45,960 that no one noticed. 497 00:23:46,680 --> 00:23:47,079 Speaker 5: WHOA. 498 00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:51,920 Speaker 4: And so with my broken fingers, I reach out and 499 00:23:51,960 --> 00:23:55,160 I get my hands around it, and I pull it 500 00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:58,559 towards me. And you know what I see? What shaid 501 00:23:58,799 --> 00:24:02,880 a Black Friday Rebate. I could get this forty seven 502 00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:07,640 inch plasma for only seventy nine to ninety nine retail 503 00:24:08,240 --> 00:24:11,160 four hundred and ninety nine dollars. 504 00:24:11,920 --> 00:24:12,440 Speaker 1: Wow? 505 00:24:12,680 --> 00:24:16,240 Speaker 4: Yeah, And I hold it tight as I slowly pass away, 506 00:24:16,279 --> 00:24:19,200 And you know what I'm thinking my final thoughts. 507 00:24:19,079 --> 00:24:22,519 Speaker 1: Family, I don't know, family, And how how tragic it 508 00:24:22,559 --> 00:24:24,119 is that you died this way? 509 00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:24,920 Speaker 5: No? 510 00:24:24,920 --> 00:24:28,720 Speaker 4: No, no, it's the TV. It's the TV. And how 511 00:24:28,799 --> 00:24:31,960 worth it this all was? No? Wow? 512 00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:35,799 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's chet. That was a harrowing story. But you 513 00:24:35,920 --> 00:24:37,680 just proved our poets my case. 514 00:24:37,839 --> 00:24:38,839 Speaker 4: Best night of my life. 515 00:24:38,920 --> 00:24:41,359 Speaker 5: Yeah, I read my cave. But you know, like just 516 00:24:41,640 --> 00:24:44,920 asking you what was the resolution of that TV? Oh? 517 00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:48,160 Speaker 4: It was probably seven twenty I think seven twenty P 518 00:24:48,519 --> 00:24:54,160 seven twenty's HD, not full HD, but HD nonetheless. 519 00:24:54,519 --> 00:24:56,839 Speaker 1: Yeah, but like what about your family? 520 00:24:57,160 --> 00:25:00,039 Speaker 4: Oh, family comes and goes, but Black Friday, y, it 521 00:25:00,319 --> 00:25:01,680 only happened once per year. 522 00:25:02,400 --> 00:25:05,240 Speaker 2: That's right, that's right man. 523 00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:06,240 Speaker 4: Yeah. 524 00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:08,880 Speaker 2: Wow, imagine the garage. You could have stuck that forty 525 00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:09,640 inch in screen. 526 00:25:09,799 --> 00:25:12,279 Speaker 4: Oh I can, I can see it. I can see 527 00:25:12,279 --> 00:25:17,000 it when I close my shattered eyelids. Yeah, ripped to shreds. 528 00:25:17,200 --> 00:25:19,960 Speaker 2: No, you still kept your form. You still look like 529 00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,279 the way you came in. Sure you'd been broken. Yeah, 530 00:25:23,319 --> 00:25:26,440 but my god, you got that TV right there, don't you. Chet? 531 00:25:26,680 --> 00:25:26,880 Speaker 5: Oh? 532 00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:29,039 Speaker 4: I brought it with me, you bet you. They say 533 00:25:29,079 --> 00:25:31,720 you can't take it with you, but I'd argue you can. 534 00:25:32,079 --> 00:25:34,519 If you get it on Black Friday, you can. 535 00:25:35,240 --> 00:25:38,160 Speaker 3: Incredible story, Chet, incredible incredible Chet. 536 00:25:38,720 --> 00:25:42,720 Speaker 5: Kurt Friday, the inventor of Black Friday. And I just 537 00:25:42,759 --> 00:25:46,599 wanted to say, you are the reason I do what 538 00:25:46,759 --> 00:25:47,039 I do. 539 00:25:47,279 --> 00:25:49,440 Speaker 4: Oh, Kurt, that means so much of. 540 00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:53,440 Speaker 5: You for your support. I was watching your funeral and 541 00:25:53,480 --> 00:25:58,039 I watched them slide that seven forty eight inch or 542 00:25:58,079 --> 00:26:02,400 into your casket as they buried you. Yep, And I 543 00:26:02,640 --> 00:26:07,400 just wanted to say it, I you make everything worth it. 544 00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:08,200 Speaker 4: Well, I you. 545 00:26:08,160 --> 00:26:12,599 Speaker 5: Know, I've a lot of people have been trampled for 546 00:26:12,759 --> 00:26:16,440 the do in the history of Black Friday. But your 547 00:26:16,599 --> 00:26:20,160 trampling just brought a little tear to my eye because 548 00:26:20,200 --> 00:26:22,920 I was like, that's why I do it. Well, that's 549 00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:23,640 why I do it. 550 00:26:23,680 --> 00:26:26,400 Speaker 4: Can I just say I thank you to YouTube, because 551 00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:29,319 there's no way I would have been able to afford 552 00:26:29,359 --> 00:26:32,039 that casket if I hadn't saved so much on the TV. 553 00:26:33,079 --> 00:26:35,359 They would have just rolled me right into the ditch, 554 00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:36,039 that's for sure. 555 00:26:36,759 --> 00:26:39,200 Speaker 2: Yeah. You know they say don't meet your heroes, but 556 00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:41,759 look at this, this beautiful moment. Chris, thank you for this. 557 00:26:41,839 --> 00:26:43,079 I don't know what your intent was. 558 00:26:43,200 --> 00:26:46,599 Speaker 5: Got a great casket and a great deal longa zen 559 00:26:46,680 --> 00:26:48,440 it it was. 560 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:53,000 Speaker 2: The brand incredible Zi good brand good brand sponsored. But wow, 561 00:26:53,160 --> 00:26:54,839 way to go, Chris. This is beautiful. 562 00:26:55,759 --> 00:26:59,000 Speaker 4: Thanks thanks, oh thank you for letting me shear my story. 563 00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:03,359 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeh know, really helped my point. 564 00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:06,119 Speaker 4: Yep, And I can't wait for the next one. 565 00:27:06,559 --> 00:27:08,160 Speaker 2: It's you know, it's in two It's in like a 566 00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:10,160 week and a half, so you better start going lining up. 567 00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:10,440 Speaker 1: Chit. 568 00:27:10,599 --> 00:27:13,000 Speaker 4: Okay, oh, I got my launchair ready to go. 569 00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:13,799 Speaker 1: All right. 570 00:27:13,920 --> 00:27:16,519 Speaker 2: That's awesome, Chit, what a beautiful story. Chris, I don't 571 00:27:16,519 --> 00:27:19,440 know what the intent was you bringing uh chd in but. 572 00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:22,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, either yeah, I don't know. That didn't play out 573 00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:25,319 the way I thought it didn't. 574 00:27:25,079 --> 00:27:30,640 Speaker 5: Did you know? It is awfully rude to bring podcast 575 00:27:30,759 --> 00:27:34,640 guests on and then with all of the gotcha questions 576 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:36,240 of aren't you the most devil? 577 00:27:36,920 --> 00:27:39,240 Speaker 1: Well, I would then saying the most see what the 578 00:27:39,279 --> 00:27:42,960 work I do? I I'm you put the words most 579 00:27:43,200 --> 00:27:46,559 I said. It's kind of evil, I think, Chris, I 580 00:27:46,559 --> 00:27:48,519 don't know what this TMZ bullshit is. 581 00:27:48,559 --> 00:27:51,920 Speaker 2: You're trying to pull with this gotcha journalism, but I'm 582 00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,519 not gonna have it on my podcast. 583 00:27:53,759 --> 00:27:55,119 Speaker 3: Okay, I'm not gonna have it. 584 00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:57,640 Speaker 5: Why you're having such a hard time getting. 585 00:27:57,400 --> 00:28:01,960 Speaker 2: Guests exactly exactly? So anyways, Kurt, let's talk about how 586 00:28:02,000 --> 00:28:05,400 we can make more sales on our Black Friday store. Huh? 587 00:28:05,480 --> 00:28:08,039 Speaker 5: Okay, let me take a look at the store. What 588 00:28:08,160 --> 00:28:11,799 do you got here? First of all, yeah, you don't 589 00:28:11,839 --> 00:28:16,440 have any TVs. No, so you gotta sell at least 590 00:28:16,680 --> 00:28:17,519 five TVs. 591 00:28:17,759 --> 00:28:21,240 Speaker 1: Okay, all right, five like five different types or just 592 00:28:21,359 --> 00:28:22,160 five TVs. 593 00:28:22,640 --> 00:28:28,039 Speaker 5: No, they're five individual TVs, so that you create scarcity. 594 00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:28,920 Speaker 1: H huh. 595 00:28:29,400 --> 00:28:33,000 Speaker 5: And then these shirts. They all just look like the 596 00:28:33,599 --> 00:28:35,960 price is the price, you have to cross out the 597 00:28:36,079 --> 00:28:41,079 price and then put a new price below. And there's 598 00:28:41,079 --> 00:28:43,240 so much fucking yellow on this store. 599 00:28:43,359 --> 00:28:45,640 Speaker 3: Yeah, it does look like it's just been drenched in piss. 600 00:28:46,079 --> 00:28:50,319 Speaker 5: That's just nobody likes the yellow store, okay, or yellow shirt. 601 00:28:51,279 --> 00:28:55,039 And also, why don't you have any blenders? 602 00:28:55,559 --> 00:28:55,759 Speaker 4: Yeah? 603 00:28:55,839 --> 00:28:58,640 Speaker 2: Blenders? Okay, we need to get on that blenders. Write 604 00:28:58,640 --> 00:28:59,079 that down. 605 00:28:59,279 --> 00:29:01,880 Speaker 5: No video games on sale here. 606 00:29:01,799 --> 00:29:04,359 Speaker 1: Nobody's there's buttons and pins. 607 00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:09,400 Speaker 5: Also, I would stop branding it with good morning from hell. 608 00:29:09,759 --> 00:29:13,160 I would put different words on these shirts. 609 00:29:13,200 --> 00:29:14,839 Speaker 2: What kind of words are we talking to here, Kurt? 610 00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:18,720 Like on sale okay, okay. 611 00:29:18,480 --> 00:29:22,160 Speaker 5: If you put the branding it says on sale, everyone 612 00:29:22,200 --> 00:29:25,160 will know that they got the shirt on sales. 613 00:29:25,240 --> 00:29:27,119 Speaker 2: So to be clear, you're saying, we need to put 614 00:29:27,119 --> 00:29:29,599 a shirt in the store that says on sale and 615 00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:30,799 put it on sale. 616 00:29:31,559 --> 00:29:35,400 Speaker 5: Yes, put the shirt on sale, got it? Because the 617 00:29:35,480 --> 00:29:38,680 thing about the seille is it's not just the bargain, right, 618 00:29:38,839 --> 00:29:41,440 it's people knowing that you got the bargain. 619 00:29:41,720 --> 00:29:42,920 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's a huge flex. 620 00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:46,480 Speaker 5: So yeah, and all this stuff looks like craps, So 621 00:29:46,559 --> 00:29:49,680 that's a good stuff because you don't want to sell 622 00:29:49,759 --> 00:29:52,519 the good stuff. You only sell the crap, right, So 623 00:29:52,599 --> 00:29:54,119 you guys don't have that issue. 624 00:29:54,240 --> 00:29:56,240 Speaker 1: Okay, good, And. 625 00:29:56,519 --> 00:29:59,680 Speaker 5: It seems like you got the most basic mug, none 626 00:29:59,720 --> 00:30:03,960 of the craft munds. It's just a random cup eat 627 00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:07,759 with your logos. That's good. Yeah, But you should always 628 00:30:07,759 --> 00:30:12,799 say one of however many and then just have more. 629 00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:18,440 But you say one of fifty limited edition, Okay, all right, 630 00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:22,680 you'll never sell fifty, not with that stuff. But and 631 00:30:22,720 --> 00:30:26,119 then you should also say you know, because what you 632 00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:29,839 really want, what Black Friday is all about, is tearing 633 00:30:30,039 --> 00:30:35,240 families apart, right, so that they can pursue their real love, 634 00:30:35,359 --> 00:30:36,240 which is stuff. 635 00:30:36,839 --> 00:30:39,599 Speaker 3: Right, Kurt, these are some great ideas. You're you're generating 636 00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:40,359 some gold here. 637 00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:43,400 Speaker 5: You know what we're doing this year. Yeah, if you 638 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:46,319 take a picture of the Thanksgiving meal where you haven't 639 00:30:46,359 --> 00:30:48,720 eaten any of it, and you get a video of 640 00:30:48,759 --> 00:30:51,880 your crying grandmother, will give you an extra two percent off. 641 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:54,319 Speaker 2: Incredible, that's right. 642 00:30:54,440 --> 00:30:57,559 Speaker 5: And also if you bring a video to the Star 643 00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:03,119 of you leaving the delivery room of your own child 644 00:31:03,480 --> 00:31:07,720 mm hmm, we will give you forty dollars off one 645 00:31:07,759 --> 00:31:11,119 of those stick vacuums. Wow, not a Dyson, but it 646 00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:11,759 looks like. 647 00:31:11,839 --> 00:31:15,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like a Tyson or something. It's like adjacent, 648 00:31:15,359 --> 00:31:16,240 but not Dyson. 649 00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:16,680 Speaker 5: Yeah. 650 00:31:16,960 --> 00:31:17,839 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's great. 651 00:31:18,039 --> 00:31:19,359 Speaker 1: The company that makes chicken. 652 00:31:19,839 --> 00:31:21,359 Speaker 5: Yes, it's a to Nikol. 653 00:31:21,960 --> 00:31:23,559 Speaker 2: Oh yeah that's good. 654 00:31:23,799 --> 00:31:27,799 Speaker 5: But Black Friday, Remember the key is raise the price, 655 00:31:28,440 --> 00:31:32,000 but make them feel like you've lowered the price. 656 00:31:32,279 --> 00:31:36,400 Speaker 2: Like you've lowered the price. Wow, I've written all this down, Kurt. 657 00:31:36,559 --> 00:31:40,480 This is incredible. You've given us some very valuable information. 658 00:31:41,039 --> 00:31:44,200 I cannot thank you enough for stopping by the show always. Chris, 659 00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:45,519 do you have anything nice to say to Kurt? 660 00:31:45,759 --> 00:31:48,880 Speaker 1: Thank you for your Don't like that, Chris contributions to 661 00:31:49,079 --> 00:31:51,200 I don't like that. Trill like that, Chris, don't I 662 00:31:51,240 --> 00:31:53,039 don't like you. Don't like that, Chris, don't like that? 663 00:31:53,119 --> 00:31:56,480 Speaker 2: Chris Well listeners at home. If you want some merchandise, 664 00:31:56,519 --> 00:31:58,720 some good morning from merchandise. Kurt watched this. 665 00:31:59,079 --> 00:32:01,039 Speaker 3: We're having a Black Friday sale. 666 00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:04,160 Speaker 2: Whoa so go to store dot good morning from hell 667 00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:08,440 dot com. We've got TVs, we've got blenders, we've got 668 00:32:08,440 --> 00:32:12,559 a sale shirt that's on sale. Really yeah, no, we're 669 00:32:12,599 --> 00:32:15,240 having all that stuff. Just play along, Chris, well, we're 670 00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:17,160 gonna have all this stuff at our store. So go 671 00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:19,920 to store dot Goodway from hell dot com and check 672 00:32:19,960 --> 00:32:21,279 out our awesome merchandise. 673 00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:22,960 Speaker 5: You're a kidnap bargain. 674 00:32:23,319 --> 00:32:26,359 Speaker 2: You're getting up a big bargain, a big bargain. All right, 675 00:32:26,400 --> 00:32:29,200 Well that's it for this week. Like I said, store 676 00:32:29,200 --> 00:32:31,200 dot can wave from hell dot com. Support the show, 677 00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,960 follow us on Patreon. You can get that at good 678 00:32:33,960 --> 00:32:37,240 Morning from Hell dot com six dollars and sixty six cents. 679 00:32:37,240 --> 00:32:40,079 It's awfully low price to be a cool supporter. 680 00:32:40,880 --> 00:32:41,039 Speaker 5: Man. 681 00:32:41,160 --> 00:32:44,519 Speaker 1: Remember when it was nine to ninety nine. That's the spew. 682 00:32:44,599 --> 00:32:46,400 It's smart down to six sixties. 683 00:32:46,920 --> 00:32:47,839 Speaker 2: That's the spirit. 684 00:32:47,960 --> 00:32:49,000 Speaker 3: Chris, you're getting it. 685 00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:52,279 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's on sale three dollars and thirty three cents off. 686 00:32:52,480 --> 00:32:56,000 Wink wink, So go check us out Hell Clayton. 687 00:32:58,160 --> 00:33:00,960 Speaker 1: Thank you so much, Zach Anner for coming on once again. 688 00:33:01,119 --> 00:33:04,119 Are I would say annual, but we stopped doing the 689 00:33:04,119 --> 00:33:07,000 show for several years. But Thanksgiving guests. 690 00:33:06,799 --> 00:33:10,000 Speaker 5: I was still on. I still did it. 691 00:33:09,920 --> 00:33:11,680 Speaker 2: By my Sempty podcast room. 692 00:33:12,039 --> 00:33:15,519 Speaker 1: Yeah, so, Zach, you were on Sigmund Freud. You were 693 00:33:15,559 --> 00:33:20,640 also on as the President of Turkeys and then and then. 694 00:33:20,519 --> 00:33:23,799 Speaker 5: I just came for the supposed finale before you guys 695 00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:27,279 went for this new cash grad that's true. 696 00:33:28,119 --> 00:33:29,680 Speaker 1: So Zach, where can people find you? 697 00:33:29,799 --> 00:33:29,839 Speaker 2: Or? 698 00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:33,559 Speaker 1: Actually you have been making some really really good videos 699 00:33:33,599 --> 00:33:35,000 on social media. 700 00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:37,880 Speaker 5: You've been telling me to go on the TikTok. Yeah, 701 00:33:37,960 --> 00:33:41,839 I haven't figured that out. Yeah, and it's fun just 702 00:33:41,960 --> 00:33:45,680 telling little stories that inspire people and then coming on 703 00:33:45,799 --> 00:33:47,880 and doing this hell podcast. 704 00:33:49,279 --> 00:33:57,359 Speaker 1: Uh and it's Zach Aner like, Yeah, you're tag typically. 705 00:33:58,680 --> 00:34:01,519 Speaker 2: Zach Anner, which I believe is your username? Is that correct, Zach? 706 00:34:01,680 --> 00:34:04,680 Speaker 5: Yes, Zach dot and or on Instagram? 707 00:34:04,720 --> 00:34:06,400 Speaker 2: I think, okay, but I don't know. 708 00:34:06,319 --> 00:34:08,679 Speaker 5: Who got Zach Anner. I can't get it anymore. 709 00:34:09,039 --> 00:34:12,039 Speaker 1: Yeah, and you're on YouTube and Facebook and everything like that. 710 00:34:12,360 --> 00:34:16,480 Speaker 5: Yeah, but you know your patrons can follow me, but 711 00:34:16,519 --> 00:34:17,239 they don't have to. 712 00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:18,480 Speaker 2: He should follow you. 713 00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:21,880 Speaker 5: If you like this, you probably won't like the stuff 714 00:34:21,920 --> 00:34:22,519 that I make. 715 00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:26,800 Speaker 2: To confirm it is at Zach dot Anner. We also 716 00:34:26,800 --> 00:34:29,679 want to shout out James Williams. He stopped by as 717 00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:33,280 a chet Ohio and his riveting story really funny. 718 00:34:33,599 --> 00:34:36,599 Speaker 5: That James really funny. You should get him on as 719 00:34:36,639 --> 00:34:37,360 the main guests. 720 00:34:37,480 --> 00:34:37,840 Speaker 4: Yeah. 721 00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:40,400 Speaker 2: Maybe maybe someday. I don't know if he'll make the cut. 722 00:34:40,480 --> 00:34:43,400 Also shout out that James is over at Instagram at 723 00:34:43,519 --> 00:34:46,159 James dot Willams, so you should just check him out, 724 00:34:46,199 --> 00:34:46,719 and he's. 725 00:34:46,559 --> 00:34:50,159 Speaker 5: Doing live shows now. He's doing the live shows at 726 00:34:50,199 --> 00:34:54,840 the Dynasty Typewriter. The answer for it trivia show. 727 00:34:55,480 --> 00:34:56,239 Speaker 2: You're on one. 728 00:34:56,119 --> 00:34:59,800 Speaker 5: Really really funny. Yeah, I was on the first one. 729 00:35:00,199 --> 00:35:02,960 But if you can, you can get in person tickets 730 00:35:02,960 --> 00:35:07,119 if you're in LA, or online tickets to stream it 731 00:35:07,199 --> 00:35:09,760 and watch it with the global audience. 732 00:35:10,079 --> 00:35:13,119 Speaker 1: It's a lot of fun and it's really really fun. 733 00:35:13,519 --> 00:35:15,400 Speaker 2: Maybe someday we'll come to me or Chris will be 734 00:35:15,440 --> 00:35:16,960 on it and joined the rinks. 735 00:35:17,199 --> 00:35:18,679 Speaker 5: I highly doubt. 736 00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:24,639 Speaker 2: Oh, thank you, Zach. I appreciate that vote of confidence. 737 00:35:25,119 --> 00:35:27,679 Speaker 1: Next week you can check out more of Zach on 738 00:35:27,800 --> 00:35:30,840 why We're going to Hell for our Patrons Only, where 739 00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:33,239 we're going to talk about some of our sins. So 740 00:35:33,719 --> 00:35:36,360 thank you Zach for coming on, and stay tuned next 741 00:35:36,360 --> 00:35:37,360 week for more Zach. 742 00:35:37,639 --> 00:35:38,760 Speaker 5: Bye bye bye.